


The Road Not Trekked: The Falling Light

by SilverShadow1711



Category: Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Death, Gen, Gore, Graphic Description, It's pretty much an R-rated retelling of Fates, Violence
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-09
Updated: 2019-04-10
Packaged: 2019-07-28 16:30:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 25
Words: 289,554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16245506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverShadow1711/pseuds/SilverShadow1711
Summary: Nerr thought that staying in Hoshido would be a temporary thing. Something that would have no lasting consequences, like a nightmare she could soon wake from. But nightmares did not relinquish their hold so easily. The war had begun in earnest, but she was on the wrong side of it. In the light, there is nowhere to hide from one's guilt... or their sins.





	1. The Falling Light

A/N- Okay, so since I've actually put a decent amount of time and effort into writing the Hoshidan branch of “The Road Not Trekked”, I've decided to post it tentatively. _Tentatively._ I may stop if the feedback is overwhelmingly negative. If you haven't read the prologue chapters of the story, you need to, because it establishes a _lot_ of the protagonist's character. Also, maybe- just _maybe_ \- you might wanna check out “The Rising Dark”, because it also has a lot of character development.

 

Here's a warning for anyone of a delicate constitution- there is going to be lots of death, lots of sadness (though really, that's already in the game), and lots of graphic violence as the story progresses (seriously, read “The Rising Dark” for an idea of how I write). The 'Fire Emblem' series is about _war_. You can try to conceal that with all the friendship rants and time-travel babies you want, but war is a dirty, violent business and I do not sugar coat what happens when you stab someone with a sword. I'm trying to make a more realistic version of Fire Emblem Fates, and reality is not a pleasant thing. If you can keep in mind that Nerr is nor Corrin, I think you'll be fine.

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“ _I look into myself, but my own heart has been changed. I can't go on like this; I loathe all I've become...”_

 

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Ch.1- “The Falling Light”

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' _Why, gods; why...?'_ Nerr's mind was a whirlwind of confusion and misery as she turned, slowly, so slowly, as if her body were turning to stone, to face Hoshido. Every step she took, away from her family, back towards her blood relatives, hurt worse than the last. Her heart, her soul, was crying, desperately pleading for her to turn around and go _home_ , but her brain, the logical aspect of her being, grimly reminded her that she had no home to go to. Not in Nohr. Not any more. Only death awaited her there now. The smug look on Ryouma's face as he smiled at her made her want to scream and vomit simultaneously, but she kept her mouth shut. Turning back to face Xander, to see the disbelief, the horror slowly overtaking his expression, made her wish she was dead.

 

“Nerr... What are you doing? This is not amusing, sister!” No. It wasn't. She inhaled shakily, opting to focus her gaze on the ground rather than at the pain in her brother's eyes.

“Xander... please. Please go back home. You... would not want a victory this way...” Not on the heels of the massacre that had just taken place, the senseless destruction that she'd unwittingly been a key part of... Her brother had too much honor to win a fight the coward's way. Behind her, Nerr could hear scoffing that sounded like Takumi, arrogant words about how the Nohrians could not win against them _any_ way. Xander was a stubborn man, however. He would not simply draw back at her request. She wondered if he would even balk at the sight of what their father had done to the innocent townspeople in the capital?

 

“Don't tell me you're siding with Hoshido, Nerr...” Siding with? It certainly looked that way, didn't it? The Nohrian girl shook her head, though it was probably imperceptible to anyone but herself.

“I... I have to stay here. It's not safe in Nohr--”

“Not safe? Nohr is your home!”

“Hoshido is her home, dastard!” Ryouma had remained silent up until that point, probably waiting to hear her denounce the wicked Nohrians, but it seemed Xander's remark sparked his ire. “Your demon king stole her away and now she is staying where she belongs!”

 

“How dare you speak that way about my father?!”

“Shut up, Ryouma!” Both Nohrian's voices overlapped, their words getting mixed up, though by their tone, the meaning was clear enough. The Hoshidan prince stared at her, aghast- perhaps he was not used to his younger siblings taking such a tone with him.

“... _excuse me?_ ” She did not care.

“You heard me. Do _not_ interrupt me when I'm speaking to my brother, Ryoma Sama.” His face flushed with anger, almost as dark as the armor he wore.

 

“That... that _man_ is not your brother!”

“I beg to differ!” Xander called out, dismounting Asmodeus. In tandem, the Hoshidan soldiers raised their weapons but he paid them no mind, his gaze focused solely on his sister. “I am well aware of your Hoshidan lineage, Nerr. I cannot imagine how betrayed you must've felt to find that out under circumstances like this, but you must believe me- the only reason we didn't tell you is because we did not want to upset you. You have been our sister since the day you arrived in Nohr, and common blood- or a lack thereof- does not change that! We are your family, we raised you- we _love_ you! Come home to us, little princess!”

 

Nerr wanted to. So desperately and more than anything in the world, she wanted to run over to Xander and throw herself into his arms and pretend that everything that had happened was simply a bad dream. She wanted to go home... But in her mind's eye, she could already see what would await her there. King Garon, staring down at her in shock and outrage for being audacious enough to survive the attack he'd so carefully orchestrated... The king, insisting that the only reason she would return after learning the truth was because she was now a Hoshidan spy dedicated to eradicating all Nohrians... The man she'd spent her whole life calling “Father” publicly executing her in the most painful way possible, because that was what they did to traitors in Nohr... She shut her eyes.

 

“I can't, Xander. I want to, but I can't. I can't go back there as long as King Garon is there- he'll kill me.”

“Don't exaggerate, Nerr. Yes, Father might see being captured by the Hoshidans as... something of a failure, but he would never kill you. You're his daughter. When you explain what happened, I'm certain he'll forgive you and we can move past all this.” Somewhere, deep within the misery and homesickness she felt, a spark of anger flared up inside of her.

 

“... _forgive_ me...?” She seethed. “As if _I_ did something wrong...!? No! This is all _his_ fault! _He's_ the one who sent me walking headfirst into a trap, _he's_ the one who sent that murderous traitor Hans with me! He _knew_ I'd get captured by the Hoshidans, that's why he gave me that damned sword, or did you not realize that I no longer have it, brother? I'd graciously return it, only it _exploded_ in the middle of a crowd of innocent people and nearly killed me. Fortunately, something blocked the brunt of the attack; _unfortunately_ , it was my MOTHER!” She could not stop her voice from cracking, with both guilt and frustration. Ryouma seemed to think he had allowed her enough time to say her piece, stepping forward, his hand resting on the gilded hilt of his sword.

 

“King Garon is a madman. What sane person uses someone they supposedly consider their 'child' to stage an attack? Admit it, Nohrian; Nerrida has been nothing but a pawn for your king to use since the day he stole her from her true family. First to keep our mother from retaliating, and then to murder her and ensure this war is fully instigated.”

“...he's right, Xander. The words may burn my tongue, but he is right. I know you, and Camilla and Leo and Elise aren't like that, you are my family through and through, but... you're not the ones who hold sway over whether I live or die. That power is in King Garon's hands alone, and that man is pure evil.” The crown prince shook his head slowly, disbelief still plain on his features. The look in his eyes... he looked like a child being told fairies were not real.

 

“Father... evil...? How can you say that, little princess...?” The hurt and betrayal in his voice cut her like paper, shallow and weak, but so much sharper and more painful than a killing blow could be.

“Because of the reasons I just told you, you stupid bastard!” She screamed at him. He wasn't listening to her- why wasn't he listening to her? Nerr already knew the answer to that question- he probably thought she had been brainwashed by the Hoshidans, that they had indoctrinated her to believe that their cause was just and Garon was evil. It made sense; Xander was fiercely loyal to their father; he would not believe harsh truths about him so easily.

“Xander, please- come with me, to the capital. You can see first hand the destruction that he has wrought. Nohr doesn't deserve to be branded with the ignominy of that coward's actions!” She held out her hands, outstretched and empty, and slowly approached her brother. He would come with her. He'd lower his sword and follow her and be horrified by what he saw, because Xander was the epitome of a Nohrian knight. He stood for justice, and mercy and honor-- She barely had time to throw herself back as he swung his Siegfried wide, the two-pronged blade scraping across her cuirass and drawing forth a shower of sparks. She landed hard on the ground, and remained there for a moment, looking up at the cold, violet eyes staring down at her.

 

“There's my answer, traitor...”

 

Traitor?

 

“ _Traitor...?!”_ What was he talking about, what was happening? Why was he walking away? Nerr scrambled to her feet, trying to chase after her brother as he returned to his steed, but something tugged her back. Looking over her shoulder, she saw that Ryouma had grabbed her tattered cape, keeping her in place. She glared at him and tried to pull free, but his grip was strong. He tugged again, pulling her back to his side.

“You can't reason with Nohrians, Nerrida. They'll kill you in a heartbeat.”

“Stop talking about things you know nothing about, Hoshidan. Xander! Wait!” The Nohrian prince had already reseated himself in his saddle, and seemed ready to return to his troops. Biting her lip, Nerr untied the Yato from her sword belt and grabbed a handful of the dark navy cloth holding her in place. The sword, despite it's ancient, battered appearance, cut through it like warm butter. She'd hate to see what it could do to a person. Before Ryouma could recover from the fact that he was no longer trapping her, the young princess ran after her brother. She just needed him to understand; she wasn't turning her back on _him_ , so why was he turning his back on _her?_

 

“Xander, _please!_ Listen to me--” He drew Asmodeus about face, one hand gripping the reins whilst the other tightened on Siegfried's grip.

“ _Enough!_ I never dreamed you would turn your back on your kingdom... on your family!! How can you believe their lies, how can you even _think_ that Father would knowingly try to hurt you?! How can you have so little faith in us?!”

“Because he would! Because he _has!_ Because he's _evil!_ ”

“You sound just like one of them now...” Xander sneered. “I bet they're _so_ proud to have their princess back, a lovely trophy to show how easily they can triumph over the evil Nohrians... You want to side with Hoshido? _Over my dead body...!”_ Snapping the reins, he spurred Asmodeus into a full gallop, closing the distance between them in seconds. Nerr barely had time to raise her sword, but even though she blocked his first strike, the force of the blow weakened her grip on the Yato. The second knocked it out of her hands completely.

 

She was not used to Xander fighting her with such intensity, such ferocity. His blows rained upon her, further denting her already ruined armor, bruising all the way down to the bones. Vaguely, she wondered why Ryouma hadn't approached, sword drawn. Wasn't he worried that this wicked Nohrian might kill his beloved sister just days after she finally returned home? No, she thought bitterly, he wasn't worried. He didn't care. Xander... if the situation were reversed, if Ryouma were the one fighting her, _Xander_ would've charged into the fray, doing everything in his power to aid her. Because he loved her. As he swung his sword again, the ebony blade cut into the part of her arm not protected by her rerebrace. It sank deep into her flesh, severing muscles and nearly striking bone, the elder magic contained within the sword making her skin crawl. As much as she would've liked to appear graceful and elegant in the face of pain, like the knights of legend she read about, the agony searing through her proved too much to ignore. Nerr screamed loudly, falling back and clutching at the wound. Hot blood seeped through her fingers, soaking into the torn fabric of her sleeve and dying the black even darker. She dropped to her knees, the pain and increasing loss of blood making her lightheaded.

 

“You have been deceived, sister. They've clearly brainwashed you. I have known you since you were a child, I watched you grow up and I know, in my heart, that you would _never_ turn against those who love you best...” Just like she thought he'd say. Xander's voice felt like an icepick in her skull. “I will not rest until I've returned you to your senses. Get up. _Get up!_ Get up and return to Nohr with me; surely there's _some_ part of you that still remembers your true family!”

 

She looked down at the grass, the tough, browning blades splattered with crimson. The same blood she always thought flowed through Xander's veins as well, the blood responsible for her being in this mess to begin with. If she had just been born Nohrian, would any of this have happened? Would Garon have still sent her to die if she had been his own flesh and blood? Such were questions not meant to be pondered on the battlefield.

 

“I can not, Xander. I'll die if I go back.”

“Gods help me, Nerr, if you don't get to your feet this instant, I'll kill you myself!” A small, sad smile tugged at her lips. That was the tone Gunther always used with her when she was refusing to do her homework. It was funny that Xander was chiding her like a small child in the middle of a battlefield. Her chest clenched as she thought about her fallen retainer; another casuality of Garon's cruelty... It further strengthened her resolve.

 

“I will _not._ Garon took away everything I cared about... You tell your father I'll see him in hell!”

“Then I shall be the one to send you there- you will NOT hurt our siblings like this!” Nerr didn't even look up, though she could tell from the creak of his armor that he was raising his blade. She did not honestly believe Xander would actually hurt her. True, he had already hurt her, but that was easily forgiven, just like when they sparred; if she had been better at defending herself, she wouldn't get hurt. The sound of feet dashing across the tough grass behind her got her attention, however, and she looked up just in time to see a blur of white and red knock her out of the way. Pain shot through her like a firebrand as the gash on her arm was furthered jarred. Ryouma had unsheathed his own sword, using it to block Xander's blow. The radiant energy of the magic imbuing both blades mingled and electrified the air. The feeling made Nerr's stomach churn.

 

“Just try it, anyan filth. I'll see you dead first.” The crown prince scoffed derisively.

“Oh, so _now_ you decide to step in and help? Where have you been all this time, watching your beloved sister get cut to shreds? Just admit it, savage; you couldn't care less about Nerr.”

“I had faith that my sister would not fall to the likes of you, but I tire of watching her try and speak peacefully to barbarians that know only death and destruction.” By this time, Nerr had pushed herself back to her feet, stumbling back to her sword. Her arm was not bleeding so profusely anymore, so she let it go, but the blood coating her fingers made gripping her sword unpleasant, to say the least.

 

“Spare me your false fraternal affection; you just enjoyed watching me get the tar beaten out of me by a Nohrian- you think that's going to convince me how 'right' you are about what monsters they are. Go to hell, Hoshidan!” The way Ryouma was looking at her, she was certain he was fighting back the urge to strike her. She lifted her chin, daring him. Inhaling deeply, the high prince looked away from her.

“I'm going to chalk that up to blood loss. You might retain some misguided affection for these people, but the feeling is not mutual. Tossing aside your sword and dying as a martyr won't do us any good!” Oh, so her dying would not do the Hoshidan cause any good? It was better to throw herself upon the sword for the glory of her country, was what he was saying. That sounded awfully familiar to what King Garon had been drilling into her head for the last decade...

 

“Drop. Dead.” Xander, as usual, was much more eloquent than she.

“Do you not hear yourself, you fiend? Be it consciously or not, you yourself admit that you see your sister as nothing more than canon fodder! I know Hoshidans have a twisted sense of 'honor', but that is just disgusting. How _dare_ you seek to take my sister from the people who truly love her?” Ryouma scoffed loudly, drawing his sword back and taking an attack stance.

 

“Spare me your mindless drivel, Nohrian; every time your lips flap, I can feel my mind seeping from my ears. Shut up and attack if you dare!”

“A splendid idea. I'll enjoy introducing your spine to my Siegfried.”

“Xander, _please_ , can't you just return home? You can't even say this is about conquering Hoshido anymore; you've spent too much time talking for me to believe such a lie.” Xander remained silent for a moment, his expression dark.

“...you are right, little princess. This _was_ about exacting our revenge, when we came back for you and saw that you had vanished... when we thought these savages had killed you... Now? ... _now_ it's about revenge for them filling your mind with their lies and stealing you away from us. Camilla! Leo! Elise! Are you ready?” Her siblings had once again climbed atop their mounts, and Camilla was already airborne, a wicked silver ax that seemed enveloped in an icy fog resting against her shoulder as she smiled serenely.

 

“Darling, I was _born_ ready. If we kill them all quickly, we can make it home in time for tea; I know how much my sweet shmoopie Nerr loves tea cakes.” Leo looked much less at ease, the darkness in his eyes enough to give their father a run for his money.

“I'll gladly cut a swath through these savages.” He locked eyes with Nerr, frowning deeply. “I know you can be a bit slow sometimes, so I'll spell it out for you. You're coming home with us; that's all there is to it. Is that simple enough for you to understand, Nerr?” If there hadn't been a group of armed soldiers locked on her, she would've dashed across the field and punched Leo right in his stupid, effeminate face. Elise, who had been sniffling despondently the whole time, seemed to perk up at her older sibling's words.

 

“Yeah... yeah! That's right! We're gonna take Nerr back home and forget all about these stinky Hoshidans! Right, Nerr? ...right?” The uncertainty in the young girl's voice tore at Nerr's heart, the urge to rush over to her baby sister and take her in her arms and assure her that of _course_ she was coming home almost too strong to resist. Ryouma must've seen that longing flickering in her eyes, because he placed his hand on her shoulder, pressing down hard enough to send the message that he would brook no attempts to flee again. Grimly, she wondered what he'd do if she tried to run; without their mother there to stay his hand, probably order her execution once and for all.

 

“Accept your defeat with _some_ semblance of grace, Nohrians. Nerrida has made her choice; all that remains is to spill your blood and wipe my Raijinto clean.” She slapped his hand away.

“Yes, the choice to not return to certain death, not stand by you and fight your battles.”

“...there is a time and place for peace, sister, but this is not it.” Was he purposefully ignoring the intent behind her words, or did he sincerely believe that she was “siding” with Hoshido? Her head was pounding sharply; she didn't have the mental capacity to ponder how his mind worked. The high prince's voice rose as he called back to his siblings as well. “Takumi, Hinoka, Azura, Sakura! Steel yourselves, because today we put these Nohrian dogs down once and for all!” There was a powerful gust as large, snowy wings kicked up a cloud of dust, Hinoka settling beside her brother. She looked down at Nerr, an expression that would've been reassuring if everything in the Norhian girl's mind wasn't screaming this was all a nightmare she needed to wake from.

 

“I'll be your shield, Nerr. They won't kidnap you again.” ' _Get away from me...!'_ Her mind screamed. How had this happened, getting trapped behind enemy lines; how had this nightmare become reality? Takumi was already lifting his massive, elegantly carved bow. There was no bowstring, but as she watched, the air seemed to swirl around him, a glowing green string materializing in his fingers. The look in his eyes was downright murderous.

“Fucking Nohrian filth...” He muttered, more to himself than aloud. “I'll kill all of you! I'll make you all pay back every drop of Hoshidan blood you spilled with interest!” Sakura alone did not seem to share her siblings' blood lust. She clutched her healing staff tightly, the handle beginning to splinter a bit under her grip.

“U-u-um... I-I'm ready t-t-too... I-I won't let them h-hurt you, n-nee-sama....” It was too much. Guilt and confusion and anger and blood loss were making her vision flicker in and out of focus. She could barely hear the heirs to each kingdom calling out for their troops to attack. The ground vibrated with the force of hundreds of feet and hooves running at full force, and soon, the clamor of battle cries and weapons hitting against one another filled the air, a deafening din. A hand on Nerr's wounded shoulder caused her to jump, instinctively pulling her blade. Azura stood behind her, her eyes widening in fear for a moment, before she withdrew her hand.

 

“You're injured, Nerr. You need to get that healed before you fight.”

“ _Fight?_ You expect me to fight my family? No. No, I'd rather _die_.” The songstress stared at her, incredulous.

“So you'd let your flesh and blood bleed for you and not even stand beside them?”

“Why don't you take _your_ ass out on the battlefield and try pulling _your_ weight instead of lecturing me, you gods damned hypocrite!” Azura's golden eyes narrowed, and she bent down, picking up one of the lances that seemed to have been dropped by one of the soldiers. She couldn't even hold it properly. Nerr wanted to laugh in her face out of spite.

 

“ _Fine_. I will, because I care about my family.”

“Yeah, you do that. I'm going to go and try to talk some sense into _my_ family.” The Hoshidan girl pushed roughly past her, and she was tempted to just watch for a while, to watch while someone sneezed on the little hypocrite and broke her in a million pieces as a result. A blur of black and purple seemed to be rushing towards them, and in Nerr's hazy, overly stressed mind, her first thought was that it was Gunther. That he had not died, and that everything _was_ a nightmare, and he was coming to wake her up and drag her to the courtyard to train. But no, this person, though decidedly Nohrian, was only wearing greaves and gauntlets, not a suit of plate, his hair silvery in the setting sun, not lilac... But still very familiar...

 

“Lady Nerr, watch out for that Hoshidan!” Automatically, she looked behind her, expecting to see a Hoshidan soldier with their sword drawn, about to sever her head from her shoulders. But there was no one there. In fact, the only person other than her not engaged in the skirmish was...

“Jakob, no!” Her feet were moving before her brain could catch up to what she was doing, and she knocked Azura out of the way just as the glinting dagger her steward held descended right where the songstress's heart would've been had she stood there. As it was, the blade made contact with Nerr's breastplate instead, the metal, already weakened by so much wear and tear, giving slightly under the force of the knife. The tip of it nicked the surface of her dragonstone, and she let out the breath she had unintentionally been holding. Jakob, however, was far from relieved. He dropped the dagger and stumbled back, eyes wide and beginning to grow misty with the start of tears.

 

“Oh gods... oh gods, what have I done...?” Wrenching the blade loose from her armor, Nerr firmly placed it back in the older man's hand.

“You haven't done a thing, Jakob. I jumped in the way of your attack--”

“And I should've stopped myself! I could have killed you! I'm a terrible steward! I deserve to be drawn and quartered for this!” He seemed close to hyperventilating, and the princess had to place her hands on his shoulders to calm him. Ever movement of her left arm felt like it had been wounded anew.

“Jakob. It's _fine_.”

“Nerr, what are you doing? He's a _Nohrian._ ” By this time, Azura had climbed back to her feet, brushing dust from her long white dress; did she even know how ridiculous she looked, waltzing onto the battlefield in that thing? Nerr shot her a cold glare.

 

“He's my retainer, so why don't you just mind your own business?” Her expression softened as she looked back to Jakob, who seemed torn between beaming with pride at his title being acknowledged, and shrinking back with shame for his apparent misstep. “Jakob, what are you doing here?”

“I am serving you as is my duty, milady. I have been beside myself with grief and guilt since your apparent demise at the Chasm. That wretched old man took off with you before I could even realize what was happening, but when I got to the fort on the opposite end of the bridge, you were gone. I assumed you had already begun descending, but before I could follow, some wicked Hoshidan ambushed me. Princess Elise had tended my wounds by the time I came to, but all of your siblings said that you were nowhere to be found...” The shadow that crossed his face looked like how she felt inside, but he quickly shook it off.

“Now that you have been found, I will be damned if I ever let you leave my sight again, milady. _I_ can keep you safe, unlike _some_ people...” The fact that he spoke so bitterly about Gunther made her stomach hurt; didn't he know how terrible it was to speak ill of the dead? But then she realized, he probably didn't know. After all, everyone thought _she_ had died, when in reality she'd been captured, so they probably thought the same for her retainer. Her throat tightened.

 

“Jakob... you need to go back. I-I can't return to Nohr; not now.”

“Then I will stay with you, milady.”

“No! You'll be branded a traitor!” The steward's deep indigo eyes narrowed and he took her hands in his own, paying no mind to the blood smears flaking off them.

“My loyalty lies with _you,_ Lady Nerr. Not some royal crest or stretch of land. _You_ are my sovereign.” He didn't question her reasons, or claim that she'd been brainwashed; clearly, he didn't care even if she had been. He accepted her decision and stayed by her side, as he was sworn to do. A part of her wished desperately that her brothers and sisters held that kind of loyalty. For a moment, a flicker of uncertainty crossed his face. “So... do I... kill the Nohrian royals now?”

 

“What? _NO!_ Do not harm them, Jakob! In fact, don't hurt anybody. I just-- I just need to talk to them, I can explain...” She was about to run off, to find her family before the Hoshidans trying to claim that position got there first, when a dark gauntlet closed over her hand.

“Milady, you are hurt. I must heal you.” Her leg bouncing with nerves, Nerr stood as still as she could while her steward waved his healing staff over her bloody arm. The feeling of skin and muscle and nerves knitting themselves back together hurt more than it did when they were severed, but she had been expecting the pain this time and managed to bite back the cries of pain that threatened to spill from her lips.

 

Quickly thanking the butler, she ran out onto the battlefield. Even from a cursory glance, the battle seemed one-sided. More Hoshidans lay injured and dying on the ground than Nohrians, their curved swords simply lacking the reach of their enemy's lances. Likewise, their armor did not cover as much as suits of plate, many of the arrows fired at them simply bouncing off. That wasn't to say the Nohrians were completely impervious to attacks. One soldier screamed as he caught a face full of those horrid throwing stars, Suzukaze pulling out a knife similar to Jakob's and slitting the writhing man's throat. Rinkah had swung her mace at another soldier's head, her bassinet flying as her skull was macerated, chunks of bone and brain splattering onto the ground. Shaking her head to try and clear it of those horrible images, Nerr ran faster, pushing past soldiers on both sides. She wanted nothing to do with this bloodbath; she just needed to find her siblings. The ground under her feet trembled, and she felt a surge of energy course through her bare soles, almost akin to a Dragon Vein, but not quite. Not trusting the energy, she threw herself to the side, rolling to a stop as the earth exploded with verdant foliage, showering the surrounding area with soil and ripping apart a group of Hoshidans who had been running behind her. They groaned and squirmed where they lay, their clothes ripped and bleeding gashes covering their bodies. The quiet clopping of hooves was almost drowned out by the cacophony of the fight going on around them.

 

“Guess you're already used to that trick. I knew I shouldn't have let you see it.” Pushing herself upright, Nerr glowered at her little brother, the haughty smirk on his face infuriating her.

“You _weren't_ aiming that attack at me...” Her voice carried an underlying threat. At once, the arrogance slipped away from his face, revealing hurt, youthful features.

“...of course I wasn't. You might be Hoshidan, but you're not one of _them._ What are you doing, Nerr? There's still time to change your mind. I know you don't believe Xander's bullshit about Father not being mad, and rightfully so; he'd be furious to hear you'd been captured by Hoshidans.” Well, that wasn't the real reason behind any anger the king felt, but the fact that Leo saw the truth of the situation gave her hope.

 

“Exactly, Leo. You see- _that_ is why I can't come back. I haven't turned my back on any of you; you're my family, blood be damned.”

“Don't worry about Father, Nerr. I'll smooth things over with him.” The innocent hope shining in his earthy eyes made him look so young; it was so easy for her to forget that, despite his grand intellect, Leo really was younger than her. “Please, sister, just come back to us.” Her hands balled into fists, ragged nails cutting into her palms. It wasn't that he didn't understand, Nerr could see that plainly; he simply didn't want to accept the truth of the situation, just like Xander.

“Do you truly think I don't _want_ to come home, Leo? Father wants me _DEAD;_ there's no 'smoothing' that out! If you and the others would just come with me to the Hoshidan capital, you can see firsthand what kind of things he's capable of.”

 

“Ha! Because _that's_ not clearly a trap.”

“Leo! This is _me_ you're talking to! I would never do anything to hurt you!”

“Maybe not on purpose, sister, but I can see these savages using your kind heart against you. Do you even hear yourself, Nerr? 'Father planted a bomb on me! Follow me back to the enemy stronghold and I'll show you!' Even your stupidity needs to have limits...” The young prince sighed deeply, flipping open the leather cover of his holy tome. The pages glowed as he channeled it's magic. “I suppose I'll just have to knock you out and drag you home while you're asleep. Know that I take no joy in this, sister.”

“Leo, don't you fucking dare!” She barely managed to squeak out a threat before he cast his spell, the razor sharp branches tearing into the flesh of her feet and scraping at her armor. She stumbled, every step a burning agony. “That didn't knock me out; it just really hurt, you bastard!”

 

“So sorry.” He didn't sound sorry at all; he was doing this to get back at her, for not making the right choice, for even hesitating in the first place, she was sure. “I'll hit you harder this time.”

“The hell you will!” She dashed forward, ignoring the pain, and struck the Nohrian prince across the ribs with her blade. The thick ebony steel deformed under the pressure of the blow, and with both his hands busy casting spell, he could not stop himself falling out of the saddle, landing in a painful looking pile of metal plates. Groaning in pain and clutching his ribs, which were possibly broken (Xander often cracked her ribs despite her armor), Leo climbed to his feet. Nerr leveled her sword at her throat. “I'm serious, Leo; don't you dare try to attack me again. I'm not fighting you.”

“Clearly you are, because if you weren't, you wouldn't be siding with the Hoshidans!” She sighed, resiting the urge to bury her face in her hands.

 

“Gods damn it, Leo--”

“Shut up and fight or get out of the way!”

“Huh?” Nerr looked behind her, just in time to see Takumi aiming his bow. A soft green arrow crackled at his fingertips, and he let it loose. It hit Leo square in the chest, knocking him back with a cry of pain, a gust of wind kicking up around them as the light dissipated. She rounded on her blood brother, furious. “Takumi! What the hell are you doing?!”

“What you're too weak to do, obviously. Everyone thinks you're _sooo_ damn special, but all you can do is run your fucking mouth. Why don't you go sit on the sidelines and sip tea with Azura; you're about as worthless as she is!” Had those words come form anyone else, thy might have been hurtful. But spewing from this hateful child's mouth, they simply bounced off her and fell to the ground, hard and sharp, but harmless. Nerr moved to stand in front of Leo.

 

“Go away, little boy. This doesn't concern you.” The Hoshidan prince sneered at her, lifting his bow and summoning another arrow.

“If you don't think I'll shoot through you, you're sorely mistaken. You might have the others convinced with your amnesia act, but I know Nohrian scum when I see it.” The princess was about to retort that if he was going to shoot her, he should do it instead of wasting time talking, but a sudden wind and large clouds of dust billowing up around them cut her off.

“Oh my, such a rude little boy. You need a spanking~!” A ball of fire hurtled towards Takumi from the sky, exploding upon impact and burning away a great deal of clothing. Dropping his bow, the Hoshidan boy tried to pat out the small flames still licking at his skin, but to no avail- didn't Hoshidans know that magical fire didn't extinguish unless the caster put it out them self? Speaking of the devil, Camilla landed her wyvern beside Leo's destrier, hopping out of the saddle and immediately rushing to her little brother's side.

“Aw, my poor baby! Did that wicked Hoshidan do this to you? _I'll murder him!”_ Tossing her fire tome aside, the eldest Nohrian princess gathered her ax from it's holster on her saddle. Nerr could feel a chill emanating from the metal. Judging by the look on her face, she was ready to reduce Takumi to a sticky crimson pulp, and while there was certainly no love lost between them, she could not simply stand by and watch her brother be murdered. Grabbing Camilla's arm, she pulled her back. The older woman was much taller than Nerr, and stronger, and could've easily ignored her, but she immediately stopped and looked down at her younger sister.

 

“Camilla, please, don't. Put him out.”

“Oh, I'll put him out, dearest; put him out of everyone's misery. This little stool threatened you! You, who's blood he shares! Why are you defending him?” That was a good question, truth be told. But deep in Nerr's heart, she knew that, despite how much she might hate someone, she would not want to see them die senselessly.

“...he's a stupid child, sister. A stupid child throwing a tantrum; I've endured enough of that to not let it affect me. _Please_ ; the Camilla I know wouldn't burn a child to death, no matter _how_ much of an insufferable brat he is.” Dark violet eyes filled with uncertainty as they looked down on her; Camilla did not suffer threats to her family. But she also usually caved when Nerr begged her for something. Heaving a long suffering sigh, the voluptuous woman closed her eyes and clenched her fist, as if crushing something. At once, the last remnants of fire were extinguished from Takumi's clothes. His skin was red and blistered where the fire had burned hottest, and his long silvery hair was singed, but he was alive.

 

“You're lucky I can't stand seeing my adorable little sister upset, Hoshidan.”

“Your mistake!” He snarled, grabbing his bow and forming an arrow quicker than Nerr would've expected. He was aiming it right for Camilla's exposed chest, the most vulnerable place and one of the only ones that wasn't covered in armor. For years, Nerr had been nagging her sister to invest in more practical armor, only for the older woman to titter and say she would understand when she got older. Fortunately, the eldest Nohrian princess had honed skills sharp enough to make up for the chinks in her (non-existent) armor. Smirking, she swung her ax like a club, hitting Takumi in the side with the flat of the massive blade.

 

“I show you mercy and _this_ is how you repay me? Naughty, naughty~” She raised her ax, whether she was intending to hack him into little pieces or else, simply bludgeon him, would remain a mystery for in that moment, a spear wreathed in magenta flames came hurtling from the sky. The razor sharp tip struck Camilla across the face and she stumbled back, crying out as she dropped her ax, her hands instinctively going up to the wound. “Augh! My beautiful face!”

 

“That's right, you ugly sow. Stay the hell away from my brother and sister!” Nerr had almost missed the sound of flapping over Camilla's cries, but quickly looked up to see Hinoka landing, tugging on the thin chain welded to the the lance's haft and drawing it back into her hands.

“Hinoka! What are you doing?!” The Hoshidan princess looked at her as if she had just asked what color the sky was.

“Protecting you, obviously. I can see you're having trouble with these sneaky Nohrians--”

“I was talking to them! They're my siblings!”

“They're the monsters that held you captive for fifteen years! But I'll make sure they never come near you again...” She readied her lance, the flames growing brighter. By this time, Camilla had gotten over the shock of the blitz attack. She looked up, the hair that usually covered the left side of her face burnt and choppy, a jagged scar gouged deep into her cheek, bright red and surrounded by oozing blisters. She drew her lips back from her teeth in a snarl.

 

“Savage _freak!_ Don't you know a lady's face is her life?! I'll rip you limb from limb!” As she once more grabbed and hefted up her lance, Nerr was certain that, left to their own devices, the royals would kill each other. Stepping between the princesses, she pointed her sword at Camilla, who faltered. Physically faltered, stumbling slightly in her effort to stop her attack before she unwittingly barreled into her younger sister.

“Nerr... What are you doing, dearest? Get out of the way.”

“No. Go home, Camilla. You and Leo and Xander and Elise and all our soldiers, you need to leave _now_.”

 

“If you would give up this ridiculous notion of siding with the Hoshidans, we might consider it.”

“In your dreams, you witch! Nerrida is finally back where she belongs, and Nohrian filth like you won't sway her so easily.”

“You are _not_ helping, Hinoka.”

“But I--” She ignored the redheaded girl and turned her attention back to Camilla.

 

“I'll return when Father dies. When Xander ascends the throne, and I don't have to fear for my life anymore.”

“That's ridiculous, sweetling! Father will probably outlive us all; he has the devil's luck as much as you do. And even if he didn't, waiting ten, twenty years just to see my precious little sister again while the Hoshidans get to keep you all to themselves? I'd rather die! No, better yet; I'd rather kill _them.”_ She began her charge anew, but Nerr was ready for that. She swung the Yato, knocking the ax aside, the brass of her blade growing icy at the contact, almost enough to freeze her skin to the grip. Caught off guard, Camilla could not block as the sword smashed into the tooth-like faulds that covered her hips. Crying out, the elder princess was knocked off balance, her tall stilettos further hindering her as she fell back. Eye wide, she stared up at Nerr, the sting of betrayal writ on her face.

“...my sweet Nerr... why are you doing this?” The honest answer was because she was a coward, because despite her misery and guilt, she still desperately wanted to cling to life. The honorable answer was because she could not bring herself to loyally serve a monster who would coldly destroy everything she held dear. She did not have the fortitude to voice either of those answers, instead repeating the easy answer she'd been saying all this time.

 

“Because I have to. If you won't believe me about Father, then... then I need you to just leave me be. Please, sister.”

“No! I refuse to leave you alone with these savages!” Camilla tried to climb back to her feet, but with a heavy heart, Nerr shoved her back to the ground, resting the point of her sword at the other woman's clavicle. The disgusted look Leo gave her did not go unnoticed, but she ignored it.

“I mean it, Camilla. Either believe me when I say that Father is a demon who will stop at nothing to see me dead... or go away.” As the Nohrians siblings stared at her, her words and actions incomprehensible, a shadow seemed to be sneaking behind them. Leo turned around just in time to meet a hay-maker to the face, blood exploding from his nose as a black steel gauntlet met with it.

“What?!” What is--” Camilla's frantic inquiry was cut short as Jakob approached her, smashing the hilt of his dagger into the back of her head. Groaning softly, the princess collapsed.

 

“Jakob, what the hell?!”

“My apologies, milady; I know you said not to hurt them, but they clearly had no intention of leaving you be. I only stunned them, I swear on my loyalty to you.” She sighed, knowing that not only did he mean well, but that he was right as well.

“Thank you, Jakob... I suppose.” Despite the active threats incapacitated, both Hoshidan royals remained on high alert, their weapons at the ready.

“I always knew Nohrians were blood thirsty, but I didn't think they'd even turn on their own kind...”

“Nerr, he still has a weapon. Take him out!” She turned to her blood relations.

 

“This is Jakob. He's my retainer.”

“He's Nohrian scum!” Takumi spat at her. Her lips twisted into a scowl.

“So am I.” Roughly pushing her younger brother out of the way, she pushed forward, looking around. Surely this was not what war looked like. While there were bodies on the ground, many more injured than dead, the able bodied soldiers seemed divided into groups, their battles coming across more like skirmishes than anything cooked up in the heat of war. She scanned the battlefield for a familiar striking figure atop a black destrier, but there were numerous cavaliers and paladins, their silver and blue armor catching the sun's rays and reflecting them back bright enough to blind. Jakob appeared beside her, and she turned her attention back to the steward.

“Jakob, have you seen Xander?”

“While I was making my way across the battlefield, I believe I saw him to the north, engaging the Hoshidan prince.”

 

“Oh, dear lord...” She felt her blood run cold. It wasn't that she honestly believed anyone could best Xander, because they could not, but what if he killed the foolish samurai? What if he was injured in the process? Her feet did not even wait for her mind to finish it's train of thought, turning and carrying her northbound. She could hardly push her way through the soldiers. More than once, a Hoshidan struck out at her, probably seeing her armor and automatically assuming she was Nohrian. _Probably_. She knocked them aside without hesitation, faltering much more when it came to striking out at the Nohrians who attacked her. Yes, they were actively trying to hurt or even kill her, but these were the people she'd longed to join all her life, the people she gave thanks to in her prayers for protecting her from the very people who's blood she shared. It was not so easy to ignore those things simply because new information had come to light...

 

Eventually, she gave up, tying the bloody hilt of the Yato back to her sword belt and reaching inside her battered armor. She could barely fit her hand inside, but she managed to wrap her fingers around the cool cerulean stone pressed against her bosom. Azura had said it contained her draconic powers and that the manaketes used it to regain their true forms, but how in the hell did one go about doing that? It seemed that, much like wondering how one's body intrinsically knew how to breathe, so too did it seem her body remembered the monstrous form contained within it's frail confines. Despite the fact that her bones were grinding and fracturing as they grew and repositioned themselves and that her organs were shifting and sliding around inside her, the pain was not nearly as horrible as it had been the first two times she experienced it. Even though the world slipped into a silvery, monochromatic haze, she did not black out once from the excruciating burning that had seared her from the inside out. Larger and stronger, she felt calmer as well. Soldiers on both sides of the battle stared at her, mouths agape in horror. The first one who charged at her, Nohrian by the look of his armor, was sent flying several feet away by a flick of her tail.

 

' _Stupid humans. Leave me alone; I have more pressing matters to deal with...'_ As she ran- or perhaps cantered, given that she now had four legs rather than two- it almost struck her as funny that she would think of the people around her derisively as “humans”; as though she herself weren't one. But then again, humans didn't sprout horns or grow tails or wings... Manaketes were “humanoid”, not “human”... thinking about herself in terms like that made her stomach hurt. Fortunately, a loud battle cry distracted her from her contemplation. Unfortunately, it sounded a great deal like Xander. She put on an extra burst of speed, coming to a halt as she saw the two eldest princes of both countries squaring off.

 

Xander had raised his sword high above his head, the deep red stone set in Siegfried's hilt shining brightly as a beam of blood red elder magic shot through the air with a crack like lightning. It would've hit Ryouma square in the chest had he not flipped backwards, proving himself more agile than he looked and putting just enough distance between himself and beam. It hit the ground, leaving a large, smoking crater of scorched earth. In retaliation, the high prince held his curved blade before his face, his left hand pressed against the false edge as it glowed white hot, crackling with thunder magic. A bolt of lightning arced from the blade to where Xander was positioned, thunder rumbling after the initial crack. Deftly, the blonde man tugged at the reins, Asmodeus reacting just as quick as Ryouma had and leaping away. The magical lightning hit a tree that had been behind his intended target, the wood bursting into flames.

 

_'Oh, damn you both. Stop this!'_ Her mind cried out in frustration, but she could not speak the words aloud no matter how desperately she wished she could; this form severely lacked a tongue or any sort of lips. To her surprise, though, both adopted and blood brother paused in their attacks to look at her. Xander's eyes widened in surprise, while Ryouma's narrowed.

 

“...Nerr? Is-- is that you?” Praying that the same trick would work, she thought as hard as she could, spurring the pain in her skull.

“ _Yes, brother, it's me.”_

“Nerrida, while it is appreciated, I do not require your assistance. Find our siblings and help _them_.”

“... _Ryoma Sama, I am_ this _close to mauling you to death...”_ Xander scoffed, rounding on her.

 

“I see you talk a big game when it comes to making threats, but you're much less eager to put your coin where your mouth is and make good on them. I raised you better than to be a coward.”

“ _Did you ever wonder why that was, Xander? Why you and Gunther had to raise me, and not my so-called 'Father'? He's been planning this form the beginning, and you're too_ stupid _to realize that!_ ” The blonde man hesitated slightly in the face of her logic, but he would not back down. That Krakenburg blood made him stubborn.

“I admit that Father wanted you on the front lines, despite my insistence that you had no place there, but I promise you, sister; he never intended for you to get hurt, not like this.”

“ _The corpse of the woman who took the attack meant for me might believe otherwise.”_

“Nerr--”

 

“The demon who spawned you killed her mother; do you truly think whatever dark magic you used to brainwash her still affects her?”

“I think it's time for you to die, savage!” Digging his spurs into the thick barding, Xander drove Asmodeus forward, his blade poised to make a killing cut. Breathing deeply to steel herself, Nerr leapt in his path, rearing up. Despite the destrier's years of training, the instinctive fear of a massive dragon roaring at it nearly had the poor horse tripping over it's hooves in it's desperation to escape. The sight of the steed she used to ride when her brother came to visit whinnying in terror, it's eyes bulging wildly, struck the princess in the heart like a blade. She settled back down.

_“Shhh... calm down, Asmodeus, it's just me...”_

“...you protect this savage who's trying to keep you from your rightful family, and then you comfort my steed... What is _wrong_ with you, Nerr?! You are acting mad; what have they done to you?”

 

“ _...what they did is not important. What King Garon did is. Return home, Xander. Ask that monster why he gifted me with a sword that tried to kill me twice. Ask him why he sent me to survey an area teeming with Hoshidans--”_

“He did not _know_ , Nerr. Our father is not omniscient. He would never--” She had grown sick of his excuses, and raised a massive claw, striking it across the crown prince's chest, shredding the violet tabard and digging deep gouges into his cuirass. If she could scar tempered steel so easily, it was a wonder Azura still had a face after she'd slapped the songstress the other day. Though he reeled back, the crown prince did not fall out of his saddle; he was much too regal for that. She glowered at him, though she could not know how well her face emoted in this form.

 

“ _He ordered that festering pus sack Hans to kill Gunther! He was the one who initiated the attack against the Hoshidans, after I told him to fall back, and while we were attempting to flee, he murdered Gunther! All under our 'father's orders! Don't you dare tell me he wouldn't hurt me, Xander; that beast has hurt me more than you'll ever know!”_ The gravity of her words seemed to sink in, but just as quickly as it seemed a revelation was dawning on him, Xander's eyes turned cold.

 

“...tragic as that may be, I'm certain there's an explanation for everything.” The cold, hard... _nonchalance_ in his voice hurt her more than hatred or anger or sorrow ever could. She just told him that their father had her dearest retainer, whom she loved above all else, _murdered_... and he simply didn't care. “I know people act irrational when they are in mourning, so I will forget your apparent 'betrayal' if you come back to us this instant. It's not too late for all to be forgiven, little princess.”

 

The only other time Nerr had ever felt such a concentrated, painful disappointment had been two years ago, at the fete, when Xander had told her that it was her duty to do as the king told her and marry who he eventually chose for her, a similar cold look in his eyes as he reminded her in as unpitying a tone he could muster that “princesses do _not_ marry peasants”. Now, once again, she was certain that she had died and gone to hell, because only there could someone who looked like her brother be so cruel and hurtful. But instead of filling her with a soul-crushing melancholy as it did back then, the crown prince's callous words instead filled her with loathing.

 

“ _...'forgiven'... As if you have the right to bear a grudge against_ me. _No... I'M the one who doles out forgiveness, and I forgive you for_ nothing, _brother...”_ She lunged at him, swinging her heavy head, her sharp horns dragging across his armor and showering him with sparks. She'd break every plate of armor he wore and trample him. She wouldn't kill him, but she'd make him suffer just like he was making her suffer. “ _You'll burn in hell for defending that monster, Xander!”_ Though he had been taken aback by her sudden fury, Xander quickly recovered from the shock, striking her across the shoulder, the edge of the holy blade barely nicking the tough scales that covered her hide. Seeing that his physical attacks weren't as much of a deterrent as he'd hoped, the crown prince held the sword aloft.

 

“No, little princess, I fear it is _you_ who might burn in hell if you don't end this madness and stop lashing out at your family. This isn't just you standing against Father; you're telling Camilla, Leo and Elise that they mean _nothing_ to you!” A crack resonating in her ears was all the warning she had before the magic struck her between the shoulder blades. It hurt, the dark energy piercing her and seeping through her body like a disgusting ooze, but it was not as painful as she knew it could be. Her tough hide probably dulled the worst of the pain. “Hell has a special place for traitors, Nerr...”

 

As Nerr reared back to strike him again, fully intent on knocking him to the ground and shaking him like a ragdoll, the air around her sizzled as an arc of lightning struck just past her ribs, hitting Xander full in the chest. She could see him seizing, could smell his flesh burning, and even when the thunder magic ceased, he continued shaking. She hesitated for a moment, but knocked him down nonetheless. Without his rider to keep him calm, Asmodeus started and took off with a frightened whiny. Even though the crown prince hit the ground hard, his armor clattering and probably bruising, his grip remained firm on his sword- she had to wonder if that was conscious, or if his muscles had simply locked into place. She put her foot- hand?- on his chest, the steel still hot from the magic that has struck it, his tabard burned away. She could hear the ebony plates groan under her weight.

 

_“Go home, brother. Call off your troops and go home. I don't want to hurt you, I don't want to fight you... but the Hoshidans do. And I can't stop them.”_ Violet eyes, misty with pain, opened slowly and seemed to take a long time to focus on her, but when they did, all she could see in their depths was loathing.

“No. I will not run like some-- some coward. The future of Nohr depends on our victory in this war, and I will _not_ let my people down.” He tried to push her foot off his chest, but she simply gripped him around the middle, her claws leaving nicks in his armor. She could probably crumple him like a piece of paper if she really wanted to. A wicked whisper in the back of her head said she was strong enough to, but she quickly cleared her mind of that thought. She was no monster. The clopping of galloping hooves gave her pause, and she looked up, at first assuming her brother's steed had returned. But no, there was a much smaller, sorrel mare approaching. Elise's long blonde hair was coming undone and her clothes covered in dust and blood, though thankfully, none of it seemed to be hers. She gasped loudly as she took in the sight before her and dug her heels into her palfrey's sides, spurring it on faster.

 

“Xander? Big brother, are you okay?!”

“Elise...” He tried to turn his head to look over at her, but considering he was pinned to the ground, his movements were restricted. Whimpering slightly, the young princess brandished her healing staff at the beast attacking her brother. Nerr saw that the crystal at it's apex was badly crack, nearly split in half.

“O-okay, you monster. You're gonna let go of my b-brother if you know what's g-good for you...!”

_“Elise... it's me...”_ The girl gasped, putting her free hand to her ear.

 

“Nerr? Oh wow, I can hear you in my head. But wait, why are you holding Xander? The Hoshidan's _behind_ you!”

“ _Elise--”_

“Come on, just... beat him up and we can go home! You're strong, you're super strong, just like Xander- you could beat up all these Hoshidans...” She remained silent, lifting her foot from Xander's chest. He inhaled deeply- she hadn't even thought she might be constricting his ability to breathe. Through her gray tone vision, she could not make out what the streaks and smears on her little sister's face were, but judging by that screwed up expression, her squinting eyes and quivering lips, it seemed likely that at least some were tears. “Once the fighting stops, you'll come home... you have to come home... you _have_ to!”

 

“The fighting will be over when your soldiers leave this place, either in defeat or as corpses, Nohrian princess. I suggest you tell your brother that, because should he attempt to continue this attack, Nohr will lose a prince as well as a princess today.” Ryouma's voice was cold and hard, but at least he had lowered his sword as he approached the younger girl. She immediately recoiled from him, eyes wide with a mix of fear and revulsion. Fearfully, lest the savage before her attack the moment she cast her gaze elsewhere, she glanced down at her brother.

“X-Xander--”

“Ignore him, Elise.” The crown prince had begun to climb to his feet, stumbling and nearly falling back down. He was still shaking, though if it was from exhaustion or the effects of the thunder magic still surging through his veins was unknown. “These Hoshidans are weak- we have more soldiers than they could dream of--”

 

“Yeah, but we've only got one of you! You're too weak to fight, Xander.”

“I will be fine, sister--”

“No, you won't! Xander, please; I'm scared! I don't want anybody else to die... Please, let's just go home...” Elise's voice cracked slightly, and she began crying quietly, her narrow shoulders shaking from the force of her sobs. Xander was clearly torn as he looked back at her, but if there was one thing Nerr knew about the prince, it was that he was a brother first, and soldier second. His fingers tightened around Siegfried's grip so strongly she could hear his knuckles cracking.

 

“...very well. If the Hoshidan savages allow it, I will order a ceasefire immediately and we will retreat to Nohr for the time being.”

“You will _stay_ in Nohr if you know what's good for you, anyan dog.” Ryouma narrowed his eyes, adjusting his grip on his own sword. “I will call off my troops attacks as well, on the condition that you do not try any of the underhanded tricks your kind is so famous for. And to ensure you don't attempt another sneak attack, any Nohrian caught in Hoshidan land will be _executed on sight_. You'd best inform your people that they are not welcome here.” Xander grit his teeth, every fiber of his being clearly wishing to challenge the man before him, but pragmatism won in the end. Curtly, he nodded and sheathed his blade. The look he gave Nerr was just as cutting as any piece of sharpened steel could be.

 

“...this is your fault, Nerr. If you'd made the right choice, we could have ended this war _today._ Every life lost from this day forward will be on _your_ head.”

“Xander!” Elise cried out in shock and dismay. “How can you say something like that to her? She's our sister!”

“Not anymore, Elise. Come, we must find out siblings, our _true_ siblings.” He turned sharply on his heel and began stalking away. The young girl hesitated, looking back and forth between her siblings. Xander looked over his shoulder, his brows furrowed so deeply even Nerr's hurt. “Elise! I won't tell you again!”

 

“I-- ...I'm coming, brother...” Sniffling softly, she scrubbed her eyes with one dirty glove and pulled on the reins, turning her mount around. Nerr swallowed hard, her mouth dry and throat tight. She could feel herself growing smaller, weaker... she hated that feeling. A part of her wished she had never turned back, that she had stayed a dragon forever just so she wouldn't have to feel like that.

 

“...Xander. Say what you will, but this war is on your father's head, not mine. You know I'm right. You know I'm right!” He did not even spare her a second glance, though Elise did. The sorrow, the uncertainty in her eyes stung sharply. “...this isn't my fault...” She whispered to herself.

“No, it isn't.” Ryouma's confirmation of what she was already completely sure of only made her feel worse somehow. “You are right, this is all King Garon's fault. But he won't succeed. We will defend our homeland, even if it costs us our lives. His tyranny will come to an end one day.” Nerr was in no mood for his motivational speeches. Dying for her “homeland” seemed a lot more heroic and glorified when that homeland had been Nohr...

000

 

The battlefield was littered with the bodies of the dead, both Hoshidan and Nohrian, though Hoshido had clearly taken more casualties. It seemed that this was the first instance the royals had ever had with fighting Nohrians, and they were disheartened to say the least. It should've been laughable, the way they were shocked that their thin swords did all of nothing against layers of thick steel plates, as Nerr sat on the dusty, trampled grass as far from the makeshift camp as she could... It should've left her doubled over in laughter, gasping for breath with tears streaming down her face, as she ran her fingers over the chinks and dents in her own armor... But it didn't. The tears streaming down her dirty, bruised cheeks held no amusement in them.

 

She felt lonelier than she did that first night in Castle Shirasagi. Back then, she could at least hold on to the thought that she was dead to Nohr because they would never know what happened to her. _Now_ , she was dead to Nohr because of her own actions and decisions. She consistently said she was staying in Hoshido because she was afraid to die by her once “father's” hands, but was living really so great when it hurt so much and left her so miserable? Drawing her knees to her chest, she wrapped her arms around them and rested her forehead against her poleyn. There were footsteps coming closer to her, but she could ignore them if she wanted to. It was probably another soldier coming towards the river to get more water to clean the wounds of the injured- they were being moved to some nearby fort or something, she wasn't paying attention... The footsteps, however, did not carry on past her like she assumed they did, stopping when the person they belonged to was a few feet behind her. She wondered grimly if someone wasn't going to just stab her through the back of her neck- it was pretty vulnerable and exposed, after all.

 

“Nerr...” Azura's voice made the feelings bubbling in the pit of her stomach all turn to anger. “We're heading to Fort Jinya to make camp. You should get up before you're left behind.”

“I've already been left behind.” She muttered to her knees. Her family, her soldiers; all gone, back home and leaving her here in Enemy Territory. Only Jakob, true to his word, had stayed. He had wanted to hover over her, but she sent him away. She wondered if he was helping the Hoshidans; Felicia probably would, just to feel useful. Flora... not so much. The realization that she'd never see Flora _or_ Felicia again made it feel as if her ribcage had suddenly become too small for her heart. The songstress behind her sighed, a sound that was laced with exasperation. She probably felt she was dealing with a stubborn, moping child.

“Nerr, I... I can understand why you're... apprehensive about this situation. The idea of fighting the people who raised you can't be pleasant. If it makes you feel better, you can leave the fighting to the rest of us.” Those words actually _did_ get a laugh from the Nohrian princess, though it came out as more of a condescending bark than anything. The fact that Azura was considering herself as part of “the rest of them” was too amusing; this frail, waif of a girl who had less combat experience than a _healer._

 

“That's funny. You're clearly the funny one of the family.” The faux smile on Nerr's face slipped away at once. “What would make me 'feel better' is if you at least went back to Nohr where you belong.”

“What?” She looked over her shoulder at the other girl, staring down at her with an incredulous expression that seemed to border on anger. Nerr got to her feet. She was an inch or so shorter than the singer, though that did nothing to make the Hoshidan princess look threatening.

“I'm here for the time being, so you're no longer needed. Go home. That's how it works, right? The Hoshidans wanted to use you to barter with the Nohrians for me; well, I'm here, so _you_ can go back to Nohr. Who knows; maybe they'll forget all about me with you there. Then _both_ our families can be happy while we're miserable.” Azura's hands balled into fists at her sides. She looked so angry, it was hard to tell if she wanted to scream or cry.

 

“Nohr is a terrible, evil place filled with terrible, evil people. I wouldn't wish that hellhole on my worst enemy...” Nerr could feel her lips curling up into a disdainful smile.

“You disgusting hypocrite... I _knew_ you were going to say something like that; I just wanted to hear it from your own mouth. I wonder if all Hoshidans are like that, or if you're just a special kind of awful- I bet you'd have kicked Mikoto to the curb in a heartbeat if anyone nicer came along.” The singer cringed, but did not back away.

 

“What about _you?_ _You're_ staying in Hoshido, _you're_ admitting what a monster Garon is; how are you any different from _me?_ ”

“The difference is, _I'm_ not throwing my hands up and calling it quits on the people who love me, the people I love, because it's easier to say 'fuck them'. _I_ have every intention of returning home where I belong one day, but in order to do so, several people need to be dealt with- I'm not going anywhere near Castle Krakenburg while that bastard Hans continues to breathe. My brothers and sisters will believe me one day; I have faith in them. They're not blind, they'll see what a monster their father is sooner or later, just as I have. Then they'll see I was right all along, then we can put all this behind us.” Azura shook her head, her long lazuline hair swaying around her like a cloak.

“If they haven't already, I doubt they ever will. You're living a dream, Nerr. And you need to wake up.”

 

“ _You_ need to shut up and go to hell! If I wanted your opinion, I'd have asked for it! Just leave me alone!” She was a few seconds from covering her ears with her hands and humming to drown out the other girl's spiteful words. Because that's what they were; spiteful. They were cruel, petty lies she was saying just to try and make it look like her brothers and sisters were evil. But she was wrong. Nerr knew she was wrong, and would hold onto that knowledge- that she was right and Azura was wrong and everything was going to work out one day- until she died. Because if she didn't, if she ever came to the realization that she had just given up her one chance to return home for _nothing..._ well, that would be the same as dying, wouldn't it?

000

 

A/N- Man, it's _hard_ rewriting 'Birthright'. I mean, seriously- when I was taking notes on the script (for scenes and dialogue to add and stuff) most of them just said “nope” and “FTS”. Seriously, 'Birthright's story is like a kick to my mind's balls- it's like 'Awakening', but worse. In 'Awakening', I don't have the option of playing as the Plegians first and seeing things from their perspective. Honestly, after Chrom explained why the Plegians hated them in the first place, my opinion of Ylisseans plummeted to 0 (Emmeryn being the only factor that kept it out of the negatives). So... maybe I'll continue? I don't want to post another story online for no one to read again...


	2. Your Best Friend

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Ch.2- “Your Best Friend”

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Nerr had ignored the soldiers moving further east for as long as she could, sitting on the river bank and watching the water flow from the mountains. There were tiny fish in the quick moving water, little silvery reflections zipping beneath the surface. She had never seen living fish before today. The river probably led to another lake, or perhaps even the ocean. How long would it take her, she wondered, if she got to her feet and began following the winding stream, until she came upon the sea? That had always been one of her many dreams, to see the ocean... The Hoshidan army was gone. They had pressing matters to deal with- their wounded, their destroyed capital, the war nipping at their heels... She could just start walking and no one would even realize it. By the time Ryouma noticed she was not there, she might have even put enough distance between them to keep him from finding her. Ever. She was a very good runner, after all.

 

But... As she looked around the deserted, blood splattered field, she realized that Jakob had apparently followed the Hoshidans, perhaps assuming she was somewhere amidst the crowd. If she left now, she would be leaving him alone, at their mercy. Her lips twisted with disgust- Hoshidans didn't have mercy. They would kill him for being Nohrian. Freedom was right there, laid out at her feet, but to abandon her retainer? The boy who'd grown up with her, endured weapons training with her... who she always roped into helping her bake cookies, and who stayed up with her at night when her nightmares were too much to bear? What kind of monster was she for even entertaining such a notion? Before she'd even realized what she was doing, Nerr had begun walking in the direction she'd seen the soldiers head in. She'd already lost Gunther because of her selfish ego; how could she live with herself if she lost Jakob, too? The Nohrian princess put on a burst of speed, every second giving her another opportunity to think about what the Hoshidans might do to a Nohrian if left to their own devices. She knew how Nohrians tortured people- anything their enemies did was probably ten times as bad.

000

 

By the time she had reached the massive, white walled structure she took to be Fort Jinya, the Hoshidan army had already gone inside, only a few stragglers remaining. Amidst them, she saw her blood relatives. She did not want to think of them as “siblings”- in her mind, brothers and sisters were people you grew up around, people you played with and laughed with and argued with, but then made up with. She had known these people for little over a week. Jakob was more her “sibling” than they were. Nerr tried to edge around them, to slip inside the fort to look for her retainer without anyone noticing her, but there was a sprawling maze of high-walled corridors that obscured the fort, and said corridors were very narrow. Takumi, who had been listening with a dark look on his face as his brother spoke, was the first to notice her, his eyes narrowing as his lip curled in disgust.

 

“Look who finally decided to join us. What took you so long, _sister;_ had to tell the Nohrians where we were setting up camp?” A tiny little part of Nerr's heart crumbled at the sound of his bitter words. She'd, for all intents and purposes, turned her back on her family because of these people, and that _still_ wasn't good enough for him? If he was really her brother, he was supposed to _love_ her, not spit venom at her at every given moment... But that part of her soul, the part that wept because she was not accustomed to people _hating_ her, was overshadowed by the rest of her. The part of her soul that wanted to walk over to the prince and punch his smarmy little face in until she gave him a _reason_ to hate her. She had nothing to prove to these people. She was not going to try and placate them- it was _their_ fault she was here in the first place. If they wanted to be suspicious of her, _fine._

 

“Yes.” She responded simply. “That's exactly what I was doing.” The royal's retainers- at least, she assumed those were the people lingering nearby- all looked at her with varying degrees of affront, and Takumi himself seemed ready to physically jump on her, but Ryouma placed a hand on his shoulder, holding him back.

“That's enough, Takumi. And Nerrida, don't goad him on. There is no time for petty squabbling. In fact, you should not have taken so long joining us; every moment we waste is another moment the Nohrians can regroup.”

“It's good you're here now, though.” Hinoka seemed to be trying her best to counteract the princes' vexation, smiling at her in a manner one might smile at a dog they weren't sure was friendly. “We've been trying to plan how we're going to set up defenses to keep the Nohrians out. They're probably going to try and come over land- everyone knows Nohr's calvary is it's strong point, and they're gonna have a hard time getting all those horses on boats.”

 

“Yes,” Ryouma nodded, turning his attention back to his other siblings. “It would be best if we head closer to the Chasm and set up blockades there- stopping them before they have a chance to set foot in Hoshido would ensure they don't have a chance to lay waste to the countryside.”

“The _best_ thing we could do is push every bastard _into_ the Chasm- they sure as hell can't bother us _then._ ” The way Takumi was glaring at her as he spoke the words made it clear he was already thinking about pushing _one_ Nohrian into the Chasm. The joke was on him- she wouldn't even mind. The eldest prince looked back to Nerr, and she looked away out of spite.

“What do you think, Nerrida? You've clearly been trained as a Nohrian solider; are we correct in our assumptions?” He actually thought she would use what little tactical training she'd studied to _help_ them? Such was to laugh. But Nerr did not laugh. The anger, and hatred, bubbling in her stomach made it feel like she'd never laugh again.

 

“I think I don't care. Do as you please.” Hinoka stared at her, mouth agape in dismay.

“What? What are you talking about- we need your input on this!”

“Yeah. This is the one thing you're actually _good_ for! What's the point of keeping you if you can't at least tell us how that filth thinks?” No longer concerned with sneaking past, the Nohrian princess pushed her way through the royals, heading deeper into the maze.

“Ask your brother; _he's_ the one who wouldn't let me leave.”

“Nerrida!” Ryouma had begun to rush after her, to drag her back or something else, she did not know, but at that moment, a familiar blur of blue and white appeared before her.

 

“Oh! Nerr, there you are. I've been looking for you.” Azura looked up at Ryouma, her golden eyes silently assessing the situation. “I'm sorry, Ryouma, but I was hoping I could borrow Nerr. Her... retainer, is a healer, but he's refusing to do anything without orders from her.”

“Then kill him!” Takumi spat, glaring daggers at the back of his sister's head. “We've already got _one_ Nohrian we don't need, and that's one too many.” The songstress leveled a dark look at him.

“...Sakura is running herself ragged trying to heal people; this Jakob _said_ he'd help if Nerr told him to.” She looked back up at her older brother, a pleading expression. Ryouma looked back and forth between the two girls, before sighing deeply.

“Yes. Fine. Take her inside. We've been planning amongst ourselves all this time; her absence won't change anything.” Azura smiled slightly up at her brother, loosely taking Nerr's wrist and pulling her back the way she had came. The other princess let the blunette lead her for a few turns, before stopping and snatching her hand away.

 

“Were you listening to that conversation? Did you decide to step in and 'save me'?” The songstress stopped as well, and turned back to face Nerr. Her expression was cold.

“It doesn't matter. I meant what I said; your retainer isn't helping and says he won't without orders.”

“Good. He's not supposed to; he's loyal to _me_ , not the Hoshidans.” Azura sighed deeply, combing her fingers through the long hair that hung in her face.

“Nerr, you don't seem to understand the precarious situation you're in--”

“Goodness, and here I thought I had simply come home to my loving family! Family reunions are always precarious, yes?”

 

“It wouldn't be if you weren't making it so. Everything you say and do is making people suspicious of you, Nerr. Hoshidans, _especially_ those from noble houses like the royal retainers and soldiers, loathe Nohrians. Takumi's your _brother_ and he already thinks this war is all your doing.” Nerr shook her head slightly, barely able to absorb everything that was being said to her. Hoshidans were wicked, small minded simpletons; she already knew that.

“So what would you have me do, Azura? Denounce my family, my homeland, and help the Hoshidans destroy everything I love?”

“...why is it so difficult for you to just accept that this is your family, that _this_ is where you belong? I don't understand...” The quiet lament in Azura's voice made her sick. And the worst thing was, it wasn't just Azura; that was probably the question her blood relatives had been asking since the day she arrived and tried to run away.

 

“I suppose for the same reason you can't accept that you _don't_ belong here. Think what you will of Nohr and it's people. I've lived there longer than you- I know better. I don't want to stay for the same reason you don't want to leave; blood be damned, we know where our home is.”

“But Nerr--”

“But nothing. I'm done discussing this with you.” She began walking once more, trudging past the songstress. Behind her, she could hear Azura sigh, then trot to catch up with her.

“Many of the civilians that were wounded in the attack are here as well as the soldiers.” The Hoshidan princess wisely decided to drop the subject. “Hopefully with our help, Sakura can treat them all. She's never had to deal with such horrific injuries before.”

 

“With _your_ help, you mean. None of these people would help injured Nohrians. 'Do unto others' and all that.” She could feel Azura glaring at her, but it didn't bother her. Not really. It shouldn't bother her; after all, what did she care if one of the enemy didn't like her?

000

 

Much like the room Mikoto had brought her to inside the Castle Shirasagi after dealing with the Faceless, there were no beds in this makeshift hospital. The people lay on the floor on thin mats, some unconscious, some pressing blood-soaked rags to deep gashes, almost all moaning or groaning or sobbing in agony. One young man, close to Nerr's age, lay deathly still on the floor beside her, his leg ripped off just below the knee. She could see the split bone, gobbets of muscle still clinging to it as it oozed marrow onto the mat. A leather belt had been tied around the ragged edge of the wound, trying to stem the flow of blood, though it didn't seem to be working very well. A woman sitting by the door, middle aged with graying hair, shuddered with every breath. Her clothes were stained a dark rust color, and from the angle she was turned, as Nerr stepped further into the room, she could see that half of her face had been shredded, thick shards of stone still embedded in her flesh which was stripped away to reveal the glistening bone beneath in places. Viscous red slime oozed from her mangled eye socket, and she gave a low, ragged groan.

 

Beside her, Azura gagged slightly, raising a hand to cover her nose and mouth. Given that she was no fighter, she'd probably never bore witness to death and pain before this. Nerr had- she had killed people herself, possibly even these people's friends and family. She was by no means used to it, but it did not come as such a surprise. What _did_ come as a surprise was the fact that there were very few soldiers here. Only a few of the bodies were wearing any sort of armor. These were the townspeople who'd been hurt because of her directly, innocents who had no right to be attacked in such a way. Suddenly, she felt just as she had the first time she'd killed a person, nausea and revulsion roiling inside her. She was so overwhelmed by the sight and stench of civilian blood that she hardly noticed Jakob approach her, as fast as he was able without disturbing any of the injured people.

 

“Lady Nerr! I was so worried about you. When I didn't find you, I thought perhaps the Hoshidans did something...” He trailed off. It seemed her retainer had held the same train of thought that she did concerning their age-old enemy. Another voice, this one higher and softer, called out as well.

“Azura nee-sama! Nerrida nee-sama!” Sakura had been standing over a boy of about eight, waving her staff over the gash in his arm as he sobbed, being rocked by a woman who was probably his mother. The wound slowly pulled itself together, the flesh and muscle sealing as the blood stopped oozing out. The older woman thanked her, relief clear amidst the lines of her face, and Sakura bowed slightly before turning and rushing over to her sisters. Despite the slight smile on her face, she was pale, and Nerr could see the tracks on her cheeks where tears had clearly been falling fast. “Th-thank you for c-coming! I, um... I-I hope I'm not being too pre-presumptuous, but, uh... i-it would be really great if you could, um... please ask Jakob-san to please... help?”

 

Tears were beginning to once again well up in the youngest princess's coral-colored eyes, and there was an obvious edge of panic in her voice. It sounded less like an entreaty to help the wounded, and more like a personal cry. In the back of Nerr's mind, she knew that helping the enemy went against everything she'd ever been taught. Father would be disgusted; even Xander would shake his head in disappointment, but... As she looked around the room, her heart hurt. It physically hurt her to hear these people cry out in anguish, the knowledge that it was because of her only rubbing proverbial salt in the wound. She nodded stiffly.

 

“Yes... of course. Um, Jakob, can you...?” She trailed off, not even sure how to word her request. Keep these people, our enemies, alive? Stop them from hurting, though they'd never do the same for us? Fortunately, her retainer knew her well enough that he could follow orders even when they weren't eloquently, or even explicitly, stated. The steward nodded briskly, pulling the long staff he used to heal her injuries from his belt.

“Absolutely, Lady Nerr. I'll see to it that every Hoshidan here is in tip top shape by day's end. They should be singing your praises; no other Nohrian royal would be so merciful to the enemy.”

 

“What are you talking about, 'enemy'?” A young girl in pink robes approached the Nohrians, her wide eyes narrowed in confusion as she frowned. She looked about Sakura's age, and Nerr could see that her hands were very bloody- she held a mass of blood stained bandages in one. Jakob opened his mouth, judging by his appearance, to say nothing kind. The princess put her hand on his arm to distract him.

“Jakob? Healing, please.” His indigo gaze lingered on the newcomer for a moment, but in the end, he beamed at his mistress.

“Of course, milady. Excuse me.” As he set off to begin working on some of the more serious injuries that surrounded them, Nerr allowed herself to take in this new girl. With her wide eyes and long, fluffy brown hair, she looked almost like a doll. Too pretty to be in a battlefield hospital. The Hoshidan smiled at the her.

 

“Hello, Nerrida-san. I'm Kazahana, but you can just call me 'Hana'. Sakura-sama has told me all about you!”

“Hana!” A man's voice, much older than the girl who'd spoken, echoed across the room. The owner of the voice, a man of about Xander's age with long, red hair tied in a high ponytail, came in from an adjacent room, carrying two buckets of water. He set them down carefully and approached the pink-clad girl, giving her a reproachful look. “The nerve of you, making introductions while I'm helping Sakura-sama.” He smiled at Nerr, bowing slightly. “I am Tsubaki. It is a pleasure to finally meet you, Nerrida-sama.”

 

She took a step back from them. The last time strange Hoshidans were this close to her, they were trying to kill her. It seemed Sakura knew these people- or at least, they knew her- but she was not interested in introductions. She gazed around the room, trying to find something to occupy herself with. There was a stack of clean bandages next to a young woman with a bleeding gash on her head. Nerr knew how to bandage head wounds; she'd gotten a lot of them, running and falling down as a child. She slowly knelt beside the woman, taking one of the bandages and starting to wrap it around the girl's head. She took in the princess's obviously Nohrian armor and flinched, but Nerr paid her no mind. She could feel eyes on her and glanced back over her shoulder to see Kazahana and Tsubaki still looking at her. What did they want from her? A response?

 

“Well... I'm afraid you probably know a great deal more about me than I know about either of you. Let's keep it that way.”

“Whaaat?” The girl's incredulous voice grated her ears and nerves both, and the Nohrian girl looked back at them again, frowning.

“I'm not here to make friends with Hoshidans. It's nice that you have names, but if you have time to introduce yourselves, you have time to help these people.”

“Ugh! That is so _rude!_ ” Judging by the tone of her voice, it was clear Hana, or whatever her name was, intended to start an argument, but her companion seemed to possess the maturity that came with his age.

 

“Even so, I believe Nerrida-sama is right. There are more pressing matters than making good first impressions.”

“But--”

“Come on, Hana; we're supposed to be helping Sakura-sama, remember?” The younger girl growled in frustration, but based on the sound of retreating footsteps, she had decided that Tsubaki was right. Nerr sighed. At least that was one problem taken care of. Silently, as she tied off the bandage, she wondered what her Hoshidan sister could possibly tell anyone about her. She had been so young when she'd been taken to Nohr- Elise hadn't even been born yet, and Sakura seemed at least _close_ to Elise's age, so it was likely _she_ hadn't been born yet either. How does one talk about a person they've never met? Probably from things she'd heard from her mother and Ryouma and Hinoka.

 

As she got to her feet, scanning the room for someone else she could deal with on her own, Nerr found herself wondering about that person they spoke of as well. That “Nerrida” person they all seemed to know and, barring Takumi, “love”. Maybe that was why Ryouma was so cold towards her- he wanted her to be “Nerrida”. The problem was, Nerr didn't know who that person was; she had never met the girl they all knew and wanted back. She could not be someone who died fifteen years ago. Hopefully one day, they'd realize that and say “good riddance”, but until that day came, she would have no choice but to continue healing the blood of her enemies.

000

 

It felt like it had been hours since Nerr had first come into Fort Jinya. Fortunately, most of the injured people had been dealt with, those whose injuries were not so severe even going back to their homes. Her hands were covered in blood, and it remained crusted around her nails even after she scrubbed them as best she could in a bucket of murky, rust-colored water. Standing upright, she arched her back, groaning slightly as she felt the spaces between her vertebrae crack and pop. She had only been bandaging wounds, occasionally helping set a broken bone or two... she wasn't even putting a strain on herself by tapping into any latent magic reserves with a staff... How did healers _do_ this? She felt a newfound appreciation for all the times Jakob had healed her after training...

 

As the Nohrian princess rolled her shoulders, trying to ease the tension knotting the muscles there, she noticed a huddle of red and white approach her. For once, Sakura wasn't clinging to her staff for dear life (it had broken from overuse and she'd had to fetch another one), and was instead twisting the hem of her skirt. Even while she moved to stand next to Nerr, she continued staring at her feet rather than actually look at her sister. How could a princess be so bad at talking to people? Nerr was no social butterfly, but even _she_ could look people in the eye when she needed to speak... She wondered if it was just an aspect of Hoshidan culture, but really, Sakura seemed to be the only one affected by it, so perhaps not.

 

“...did you need something, Sakura?” She prompted as gently as she could, wiping her hands on her tights- yes, they dripped with bloody water, but it wasn't as if her clothes were actually _clean._ The rose-haired girl started slightly, looking up as though she'd actually forgotten there was someone there.

“Oh, um... no. W-well, yes, actually... Um... t-thank you for helping, nee-sama. Y-you're very good at, erm... dealing with injured p-people...”

“It was nothing. You and Jakob did all the actual healing. I just tied people back together.” Sakura shook her head slightly. The white ribbon she wore in her hair was coming undone; Nerr could feel her own hair coming loose. Her stomach clenched as she realized she wouldn't be asking Flora to retie it any time soon...

 

“Oh, no- w-what you did was... _really_ helpful! I... I'm not very comfortable around blood... W-when I see people hurt so badly, I-- I freeze.” She looked back down, a miserable expression clouding her face. She blinked hard, though, and looked back up, determination shining in her eyes. “B-but I can't let that stop me from-- from doing what needs to be d-done. I-I have to help our soldiers, right?”

“...I suppose that's what your family would want from you.” The young girl nodded again, slowly growing more confident. It was strange to think that this shy, retiring little wisp of a girl was her little sister. In Nerr's mind, little sisters were exuberant and brimming with confidence. They didn't ask for validation; they were the ones who told _you_ you could do anything you set your mind to, because you were their big sister/brother. But then again... all of her family members were confident. That was part of why she admired them so greatly, why she strove to be like them... thinking about that was painful, and she only just realized Sakura was still staring up at her, occasionally casting her gaze away for a moment before looking back. This girl was so strange...

 

“Uh... n-nee-sama...? Will you-- will you help me?”

“...help you what?”

“B-be a better healer. I-I want to be brave and not cringe when people b-bleed on me, like you are.” Nerr looked away from her.

“...I'd hardly say I'm brave for that...” After all, she'd had people bleed on her before; their hot, sticky blood pouring over her like a baptism as she sank her blade deep into their flesh, cutting them open and killing them, Hoshidans who threatened her country, her people, possibly even the relatives of those she now helped... There was still blood under her nails. As far as she knew, it had been there form her first true battle. Maybe that was just what color her hands would be from now on... Sakura didn't seem to notice her sudden change in demeanor, or like all young children, simply didn't understand it. She changed the subject.

 

“Oh! Um, I, erm... I heard you met my retainers.”

“Who?” When had she met any retainers? Had they been amongst the wounded?

“Hana-san and Tsubaki-san. Th-they told me they introduced themselves...”

“Oh. Them.” Yes, she vaguely remembered people with those names. Nerr hoped she wasn't expected to actually remember any of the Hoshidan royal retainers; she barely remembered her own siblings' hangers-on, only that both of Camilla's were women and both of Leo's were men. That was okay, but the fact that _she_ had two male retainers was apparently considered a faux pas, according to Xander... The princess doubled over slightly, the pain in her gut growing sharper. She couldn't really say she had two retainers anymore, could she...?

 

“N-nee-sama? Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Yes, she was hurt, but not in a way a healer could fix. Nerr shook her head, forcing herself to stand up straight again. A small part of her wanted to find an unoccupied corner of the room and lay down, but that would only have Sakura asking more question which would lead to Jakob getting worried, and... she just couldn't deal with that. Not now, not surrounded by Hoshidans. Perhaps there would be a moment where she and her steward could simply sit and talk in peace and she could tell him everything and he would rub her back as she cried into his shoulder like she used to when they were children... But that would have to wait. One of the screen doors that partitioned the room slid open, and a harried-looking Azura rushed in. There wasn't a drop of blood on her pristine dress, Nerr realized with a surge of annoyance. Her eyes locked onto the Nohrian princess at once and she frowned slightly.

 

“Nerr. We've got trouble.”

“What now?” It was always _something_ with these Hoshidans, wasn't it?

“The Nohrian soldiers haven't wasted any time surrounding us.”

“What?!” That was actually worrying, if not confusing. How did they get so far inland- she had _seen_ them retreating, had dug deep and used all of her will power to not run after them. Didn't Ryouma say that if they came back, they would be executed on sight? Speaking of which-- “Well, what's Ryouma doing about this? Shouldn't the emperor be directing his army?” Azura shook her head, panic plain in her eyes.

 

“Ryouma left hours ago, Nerr. Along with Hinoka and Takumi and their retainers; they were heading to the border, and Hinoka went back to the capital, remember?” The the Nohrians must have flanked them to get to the fortress; they were probably on their way to the capital. Sakura looked even more frightened than her older sister, her breath coming in sharp gasps.

“Oh no... oh no oh no oh no... I can't believe th-they'd attack at a time like this... Th-there's no military target here- w-we're using the fort as a m-m-makeshift hospital...!”

“Well, I sincerely doubt _they_ know that.” Nerr was quick to defend her people. “It's not like you posted a sign outside that says 'Hospital'; this place is _clearly_ a military target. I saw the ballistae outside, and so do any approaching soldiers. But it isn't as if you have anything to worry about; I'm certain your brother left plenty of soldiers to protect you and his people.” Azura shook her head slowly.

 

“No. I'm afraid not; whatever soldiers aren't accompanying him and the others to the border are protecting the capital.”

“...then who's protecting the people who need it?” Even though this was not her fight, even though these people were her enemy, Nerr could not help but feel disgusted by the complete disregard for their safety. Xander would've at least ordered a platoon to remained stationed anywhere large groups of injured civilians or refugees were housed. Sakura sniffled and began weeping softly, covering her eyes with her arms as the dire nature of their situation dawned on her. Azura was at least quick to walk over and pull the younger girl into her arms, quietly shushing her. Another screen opened, and the two people from before- the retainers- walked in, looking worried. The girl rushed over to her mistress at once, firmly grabbing her shoulders.

 

“Don't worry, Sakura-sama; _I_ can handle these Nohrian dogs, no problem!”

“With my help, of course.” Tsubaki intoned, as though it were a practiced reflex to add. They'd probably been listening in at the door, which wasn't all that difficult seeing as they were made of paper. “If you'd like, Sakura-sama, you may remain with the injured while we resolve this unpleasant matter.” Sniffling, the young princess looked up at her retainers.

“B-but... who knows how many soldiers are out there...? You two ca-can't take them all on by y-yourself...!”

“Sure I can! I'm stronger than ten Nohrians; they won't know what hit them!” Hana sounded even younger than she looked, a stupid child who believed herself to be invincible. It was little wonder Tsubaki served alongside her; were it just the brunette alone, Sakura would very quickly be out of a retainer.

 

“We would not be alone, milady; Suzukaze and Rinkah-sama are still here, remember? And there are many choke points between the battlements and the fort itself; funneling those stupid barbarians into our blades will be as child's play.” Azura nodded slightly, and while it may have been with the notion that all was _not_ in fact lost, Nerr could not help but feel she definitely agreed with the notion of Nohrians being “stupid barbarians”...

“I will go as well. I may not be skilled at fighting, but I can keep soldiers fighting twice as long.” She looked at the Nohrian girl. “And Nerr will join us, I'm certain.” Before she could even open her mouth to spew out the expletive-laced hatred that had been stewing inside her, Sakura's retainers chimed in, Hana being the first and loudest.

 

“That's right! With the other royals away, leadership falls to the second princess, no matter how rude she is. As Sakura-sama's lead retainer, it'll be my pleasure to take your orders.” Tsubaki stepped in front of his companion, blocking her completely from view- Nerr had to admit, it did wonders for the scenery.

“And as Sakura-sama's _supervising_ retainer, I, too, welcome your leadership.”

“ 'Supervising' retainer?! That's not a thing!”

“Well, neither is 'lead retainer'- I don't remember you getting a promotion.” Any pretense of professionalism fell away immediately as the two Hoshidans began bickering. It was hard to tell what was more painfully unfunny; the fact that they were yelling at each other in a hospital setting, the fact that they were arguing as the enemy drew ever closer, or the fact that they were arguing about who was the better retainer. The saddest thing was, Nerr was used to these kinds of tiffs; they happened all the time back at the citadel, especially between Gunther and Jakob. She could see them so clearly in her mind's eye, engaging in the age-old argument of who's duties were more important for her ladyship's daily life... She wanted to scream. So she did.

 

“Gods, shut the fuck _up!!”_ A heavy, oppressive silence descended on the room. Even the crickets outside seemed to still their chirping. All four Hoshidans were staring at her in disbelief, but she did not care. It was no wonder their country was being run over if _this_ was how their soldiers behaved. “There is a battalion of soldiers heading this way with the intention of _slaughtering_ you, and you're bickering over _chores!?_ _You_ protect the youngest princess of Hoshido? Ha! She'd be in better hands if left with wild dogs! It would be more useful to everyone if you two ran to find something to use as a white flag, because that's _clearly_ the only way you're going to be able to deal with the enemy!” Tsubaki simply gaped at her, the blank look in his eyes and quivering jaw making it look as if he'd had a stroke. Hana's shock was quickly becoming anger, as it often seemed to, and she turned towards her liege.

 

“Sakura-sama! You can't let her talk to us that way!” It seemed Sakura too was getting over her shock, a tinge of something similar to anger creeping into her expression as well as she looked at her retainers.

“I-I can, and will, because sh-she's right. You're embarrassing yourselves- a-and me!” Hana looked as if she'd been slapped across the face at those words, but the young princess paid her little mind, turning back to Nerr. “N-nee-sama, please don't let this... juvenile display de-decieve you. Hana-san and Tsubaki-san are both extremely c-capable on the battlefield. A-and they're both going to set aside this... p-petty argument and help you... _right?”_ She looked back at them, coral eyes narrowed. They both seemed to shrink under her gaze, proverbial tails between their legs.

“Of course, Sakura-sama...” It seemed odd to hear Hana so... demure. Tsubaki almost sounded like his normal self, but there was something definitely forced in his smile.

“Certainly. Expect perfection and you will not be disappointed, milady.” Nerr scoffed under her breath.

 

“I'll believe it when I see it.” Azura had been watching the scene unfold with darkly assessing eyes, and only spoke up once it seemed the storm had died down some.

“We should get moving and face the intruders head on. We must protect our wounded!”

“ _Your_ wounded.” The other princess hissed at her quietly. If she wanted to take charge so badly, Nerr would gladly let her. She was in no hurry to face off against her own soldiers once again.

000

 

Despite it being night, the sun still shone in Hoshido. It had nearly set below the horizon, but there was still enough light to pain the landscape and undersides of the clouds a deep golden orange. Nerr climbed atop one of the ballistae situated near the front of the fort. It was the strangest mechanization she'd ever seen, filled with all sorts of complex gears and springs. But she had no intention of using it. She simply needed a better vantage point. She could see the Nohrian soldiers, a middling mix of calvary and infantry, their silvery armor gilded by the sun's light. It was a small regiment, no more than twenty soldiers, though that was still more than the Hoshidans had available to them. A part of Nerr's mind wondered if surrender was not an option- she knew her soldiers, her people. They would not be interested in harming injured civilians, or a little girl incapable of fighting back. One of the cavaliers sitting high atop a sorrel destrier pushed through the throng of soldiers. She could see that his armor was black, and apparently better crafted than the standard plate the other knights wore. He must've come from a noble house; certainly his features looked rather refined, though his silvery hair seemed in dire need of a brushing. He looked up at her, or at least, in her direction, his voice echoing over the winding levees.

 

“Ho, Nerr! Is that really you?” The Nohrian girl felt a chill run down her spine. It wasn't at all strange that a captain would know her name, especially if they had been sent by Xander, but there was something about the... familiarity his voice conveyed. She swallowed hard, refusing to let anyone see her rattled.

“Who's asking?”

“A friend! A friend who wants you to put this madness behind you and return back where you belong.” Below her, Rinkah scoffed, muttering to Suzukaze.

“These Nohrian dogs just don't know when to admit they've been whupped, do they?” She shook her head slightly, turning her attention back to the “Nohrian dogs”. The captain was still speaking, still still trying to entreat her.

 

“I don't wish to involve you in this fray, Nerr. Please, come back- you'll be safe with us.”

“Who is 'us'?”

“It's me, Silas? Don't you remember? We played together as children!” The princess shuddered deeply at those words. Yes, she played with someone named “Silas” when she was little... it had been a figment of her imagination, some dreamed up companion to ease the sting of loneliness. Or maybe, if Gunther's stories were to be believed, it had been the lingering spirit of some long dead child who'd been just as lonely and desperate for companionship as she had been. Either way, Nerr remembered playing hide and seek with _no one_ , and chasing _nothing_ down the halls. She didn't appreciate anyone making her relieve those days of mental weakness.

 

“Enough of your lies! I don't know you!”

“But--!” She ignored his words, climbing down the thin, rickety ladder. Jakob's eyes were filled with concerned as he looked at her.

“Milady? Are you alright? Who was that?”

“No one! I'm not crazy!” Given the way the Hoshidan looked at her, it was clear they had differing opinions, but it was easy enough to ignore them. What did they know about her childhood? Suzukaze broke the tension, his voice quiet and collected.

 

“What do you suggest we do, Nerrida-sama? If we force the enemy to come to us, we can certainly take advantage of the terrain, but the soldiers might not be foolish enough to run headlong into so obvious a trap.”

“I say we rush out and take them head-on.” Rinkah frowned, shouldering her mace. Soot clung to the brass head. “If we hit 'em hard and fast, we can kill them all before they even realize what's going on.”

“... _kill them?_ No.” Nerr shook her head hard enough that her hair hit her in the face. “We aren't going to kill them.”

 

“We have to!” Hana said passionately. “They're Nohrians! What are we supposed to do; ask them nicely to stop trying to invade? If we spare them, they'll just turn around and keep fighting us. That's all that degenerate scum is good at.” Tsubaki nodded.

“I agree with Hana. The only way we can be assured that they won't organize another attack while we're weak is to ensure they can't attack us again, _ever._ It's not as if they would make an effort to spare _us_ were the tables turned.” The crowd, save Nerr and Jakob, murmured in agreement. She felt like she was going to be sick. It was clear her input did not matter, her words would not sway them; they said they would listen to her (apparently because she was royalty), but in truth, they only intended to listen if she gave them orders they wanted to follow. Gritting her teeth, she grabbed Jakob's wrist and began pulling him towards the front of the maze.

 

“Lady Nerr? What are you--”

“We are _not_ killing these soldiers, Jakob. I will not stand by and watch these savages kill our people. We just-- we just need to incapacitate them. If they can't fight back, they're not a threat.” She pulled her sword loose from her belt (she desperately wished she had a sheathe for it- were it not for her greave, her leg would be cut to shreds). “Aim to hurt, not to kill. I know I can at least count on you for that.” The butler beamed at her praise.

 

“Indeed you can, milady. These soldiers will think they've drifted off into a gentle slumber when I'm through with them.” Nerr could hear the others behind them and sped up. As she turned a corner, she ran into a man with a dark hood pulled over his face, a bow in hand. As he raised it, trying to find a chink in her armor to aim for, the princess charged forward, striking him across the chest with the flat of her blade. She could feel the cartilage of his rib snap under the pressure, but though he cried out in clear agony, he would not die. She grabbed the Nohrian's shoulders, slamming him into the wall for good measure. He stumbled back, dazed, and collapsed into a heap. Well. That was one down, twenty or so to go. Passing through the narrow corridor, it opened into a much larger, much more open space... one that was already filled with soldiers. One, a knight in heavy, bulky armor, began to swing her lance the moment she caught sight of Nerr, but stopped suddenly, looking up at the cavalier beside her.

 

“It's the princess.” She whispered. “We're not s'pposed to kill her; what do we do?” The man she spoke to looked at said princess thoughtfully, before drawing his own sword.

“The captain didn't say anything about knocking her out. We'll truss her up like a deer and take her back to camp.”

“I think not!” The soldier's plans were rudely interrupted by the dagger scraping across his cuirass. It did not penetrate the thick steel plates, but it certainly left a deep gouge in them. Jakob was pulling another blade from the holster at his thigh. “Truss my ladyship up like a deer; how dare you!” He had begun to run towards the obviously bemused cavalier when another projectile whizzed over his head, giving him pause. It sank deep into the Nohrian man's face, the points of the iron star cutting into his eye and almost certainly embedded in the bone of the socket and cheek.

 

He shrieked loudly, dropping both his blade and reins, and writhing so frantically his steed began to panic as well. His fellow knight attempted to, at the very least, regain control of the massive beast, but a man carrying a long lance had by that time gotten close enough to strike her. The thin, curved blade easily made it's way under her massive pauldron, slicing through the lower half of her face with ease. She could not even scream as the blood spilled over her armor, could only let out a wet gurgle. It would've been too grisly a sight to tear her eyes from had another cry from her right not drawn Nerr's attention. Hana was busy cutting down another bowman, literally cutting him down piece by piece as her own curved blade removed an arm before being thrust into his gut and pulled out with a stream of crimson.

 

Vaguely, the Nohrian princess remembered what Sakura had told her, that Hana and Tsubaki were both very good soldiers. She'd scoffed, wanting to see proof before believing such a claim. Silently, she cursed the gods for answering that unintentional request. All the while, Azura remained out of fighting range (and the splash zone for blood), her arms lifted high as she vocalized in a warbling tone, the fine mist that filled the air indeed seeming to lessen the strain on those fighting for Hoshido's glory. Rinkah had knocked another knight to the ground and was currently trying to hammer him flat within his armor when a wooden javelin came hurtling through the air, striking her in the shoulder. She cried out loud as her flesh was decimated, the bone beneath splintering. A hearty tug on the chain attached to the spear drew it back to it's owner, the noble-looking knight in his black and silver armor. The hatred in his eyes turned them dark as he looked upon his butchered comrades.

 

“Soldiers! That's enough, retreat!” He called out to the few remaining. One, a cavalier currently trying (and failing) to run Suzukaze through looked back at him.

“What about our orders?”

“To hell with them! I said fall back! GO!” Reluctant to turn their back on an enemy clearly intent on destroying them, the Nohrian knights still standing banded together, weapons drawn and their backs together as they desperately formed a retreat. One archer called out to this “Silas”, her voice breaking with fear or pain, it was hard to tell.

 

“Captain? What about you?”

“I'll cover your retreat. Return to camp and tell Prince Xander what happened.”

“We aren't going to leave you!” Another cavalier, this one trying to hold his lance and reins in one hand while the other was pressed to the bleeding gash in his neck. Silas glared at him.

“Don't question me again, soldier. _GO!_ ” Slowly, and with undoubtedly heavy hearts, the knights retreated, disappearing behind a wall. The tension did not ease, though, the groans of those still dying almost more oppressive than utter silence. Silas looked upon the Hoshidan soldiers, their weapons all still drawn, before his gaze finally landed on Nerr. She couldn't tell what emotions were in his eyes, an unpleasant mix of everything dark and heavy and upset.

 

“It's been a while....” He muttered, almost to himself more than to her. “It's been too long, Nerr. You know, I became a knight just so I could see you again... Just like how we always pretended it would be; me saving you from the evil dragons...” _'The dragons weren't evil- I liked them...'_ “But you always ended up siding with the dragons.” Nerr shook her head, stepping back from him unconsciously. She could feel something hot and wet sticking to the soles of her feet.

“Shut up...” She hissed at him. “You don't know me.”

“You always made me act out scenes from that stupid 'Prideful Princess' book.”

“Stop trying to trick me, ghost! You can't make me think I'm crazy! _You're_ crazy! You're not real!” She didn't care about the looks everyone was giving her; it was much too disturbing to think how this... _monster_... knew about the saddest, loneliest memories from her childhood. Suzukaze stepped forward, readying another shuriken, his eyes narrowed.

 

“Clearly, the princess does not know you. You should leave with your soldiers.”

“Don't listen to my words, savage. This has nothing to do with you.” Silas spat back at him, his attention turned to Nerr once more. “You don't remember me... that's fine. You can still come back to Nohr, though. It's not too late--”

“I'm afraid you're wrong, spectre; I'm well past the point of no return.”

“How can you say that, Nerr? How can you willingly stand alongside these murderous heathens?! Look what they've done to your people!” He gestured to the bodies in their death throes, breathing their final breaths. It made her want to vomit. “You can't tell me you condone this!”

 

“...I'm telling you I can't go back.” The cavalier's grip tightened on his javelin, and Nerr wondered if he was going to throw it at her next. Unconsciously, she braced for the impact, but it seemed she was not alone in noticing that tiny gesture. Jakob and Suzukaze both rushed forward, the former driving his dagger deep into the flesh left uncovered by the knight's cuisse, whilst the later pulled him from his steed. Silas landed in a heap of limbs and plate, his weapon lying a few feet away from him, and a Hoshidan-styled dagger pressed to his throat. He did not look at the green-haired shinobi who held his life in his hands, but rather, at Jakob. He laughed humorlessly.

 

“Even _you're_ turning on me, Jakob? I guess I shouldn't be surprised- really, I should be happy Nerr has such a devoted retainer... Even if I _was_ a little jealous of you...”

“Yes, I'm certain you were jealous of a _servant_ , what with that silver enema stuck up your ass.” There was something about that exchange- aside from Jakob's sudden hostility- that struck her as odd. The princess took no more than a step towards the fallen captain before a familiar soft hand closed over her wrist. Azura's face was tight with... worry? Anger? She did not know, or care.

“Nerr, he's trying to trick you. Don't listen to him; just let them kill him and be done with.” With her other hand, Nerr roughly pushed the songstress away, feeling a thrill of satisfaction as the delicate girl fell into a puddle of blood congealing on the dusty stone floor.

 

“Don't try to turn me against my people, _Hoshidan_ ; I assure you, you'll fail.” Slightly bolstered, the Nohrian girl walked over to Silas, pushing the ninja's weapon aside as well. “...how do you know Jakob?” The knight at her feet looked up at her. When they weren't so dark, his bright green eyes reminded her of a stone she'd had once, long ago. It had been a pretty shade of green as well.

“He was already serving you when you and I met. We talked a couple times... well, he mostly told me that you didn't need me and he was more than enough of a friend for you.” Nerr looked over to her steward, who was suddenly very interested in the opposite wall. His face was flushed slightly- in anger, undoubtedly.

“Jakob? Is-- Is that true?” The butler looked down this time, still refusing to even meet her gaze. “Jakob!”

 

“He was always making snacks for you- well, as much as an eight-year old can make snacks- and never let me have any. One time, your sister Camilla brought cookies, and _she_ let me have some--”

“Not me. I didn't have any.” The words spilled from her lips before she could even think about them, the memory bubbling to the surface of her mind. “She said she baked them special for me, but I didn't get a single cookie...”

“And you got really mad at her.” Silas nodded, his expression growing brighter. “You yelled at her, and she hugged you... and I was always jealous of you for having such a great family...”

“...how do you know that...?”

 

“Because I was there! I practically _lived_ in the Northern Citadel for two years, I was there so often! I know you remember me, Nerr!”

“He's lying, Nerrida-san!” Hana scowled deeply at the scene playing out in front of her, and adjusted her grip on her sword. “All Nohrians know is how to lie; he's just trying to get you to lower your guard so he can stage another attack!”

“Don't listen to them! You _know_ who I am, you _know_ I would never lie to you...” Breathing deeply, Nerr turned to Jakob once more.

 

“Jakob. I'm _ordering_ you to tell me if what he's saying is true.” She rarely, if ever, ordered her retainers to do anything. She never needed to; a polite request had always been enough to get them to do whatever she was asking. The butler flinched slightly, slowly looking up as if meeting her eyes was the hardest task in the world.

“...it is. I remember this churl- he was always scuffing the floors in the citadel with his shoes, and using the freshly folded sheets for tents, and eating all the snacks I made for you even though I _told_ him not to!” Each one of his words added another weight to Nerr's heart, dragging it down through her ribcage and onto the floor. Inhaling deeply, she tied her sword back to her belt and clasped Silas' hand in her own, heaving him to his feet. He stood a little shorter than Jakob, though that was not unusual- her steward was very tall, almost as tall as Gunther had been- but still taller than her. His expression had gone from hopeful to confused.

 

“What are you doing, Nerr?”

“Yes, what _are_ you doing, Nerrida-sama? He's the enemy!” The incredulity in Tsubaki's voice grated her nerves. For such a peaceful country, the concept of things like “mercy” sure seemed foreign to them.

“He isn't the enemy. He's my friend.”

“You can't honestly believe that horse shit!” Rinkah's voice was tight with pain, her dark skin pallid as she held a bloody wad of pink cloth to her ruined arm. Nerr might have felt sorry for her had there not been macerated chunks of meat and hair and bone stuck in the grooves of her club.

“What reason do I have to doubt my memories? Just because they're not clear doesn't mean they're not there. This battle is over; you all won. Go back inside.” By that time, Azura had gotten back to her feet; with her hair mussed and her clothes drenched in blood she helped spill, she no longer looked so angelic.

 

“But Nerr--”

“Does it sound like I'm asking you a question, Azura? As you people keep reminding me, I am a princess of Hoshido- the _real_ princess, unlike _you_ \- so when I tell you to go inside, I expect you to do it.” A spark of something, either fear, hate, or a mixture of both, sparked in the songstress's eyes for a moment before dying away. Perhaps she was simply remembering what happened the last time Nerr had been upset with her. Suzukaze, the one person with a modicum of common sense, was the first to step away from the group of Nohrians, and the only one to bow respectfully. The others followed his lead, leaving the carnage behind and returning to the safety of the fort once more.

000

 

It was impossible to know what time it was simply by looking at the sky in Hoshido. Everything remained that strange mix of orange and purple, as if the sun could never truly set below the horizon. If she looked hard enough to the west, Nerr could make out the deep, rich indigo of the sky over Nohr. Although it was probably cloudy, thick, dark clouds getting ready to bury the country in snow and rain, she imagined the stars were shining brightly. She never dreamed she could miss those brilliant pinpricks of lights. But then again, she never dreamed she'd be somewhere she couldn't see them... The princess sat amidst a small copse of trees outside the walls of Fort Jinya. The dead had not yet been removed, and she wondered if they even would be, or if they'd just be left for rats and other scavenging creatures. She had no faith in the Hoshidans; they were so unorganized, so incompetent at anything that did not involve killing, it seemed.

 

She hugged her knees tighter to her chest. Silas sat with her, his back pressed against a tree. His trousers were torn and bloody where Jakob had stabbed him, though the steward had at least healed the wound. He had run back inside the fort, saying he needed to retrieve something, and while Nerr did not like the thought of him being alone with the Hoshidans, she knew her retainer well enough to rest assured that he could at least get out of a situation like that and return to her. It also allowed her a brief moment of privacy with her once only friend. He told her how they had snuck out of the citadel once, the confines of the outer bailey being the furthest she'd ever gone before that day. Stupid children that they were, they'd had a picnic amidst the desolate scenery, completely unaware of the dangers of bandits, Wyverns, landslides... When he mentioned the knight that had come after her, riding hell to leather, her eyes burned with tears that she would not allow to fall. After that day... Silas stopped coming, banned from ever seeing her again (from, in fact, coming anywhere near the citadel). Nerr rested her forehead on her knees, the cold steel of her poleyns soothing the headache she could feel coming on.

 

“...I thought I made you up... Everyone said I made you up...”

“They were probably just trying to protect you from the truth. I mean, if someone told me _my_ best friend kidnapped me and had been sent away to avoid the execution block, I'd be pretty traumatized.” The cavalier laughed slightly, though it seemed a bit strained. He sighed deeply. “Do you truly not intend to return to Nohr?”

“Not yet.”

“There may not be another chance, Nerr.”

 

“Well, there certainly isn't a chance _now!”_ She groused. “King Garon is _mad_. He gave me a cursed sword and sent me to be captured by the Hoshidans! And I know he meant for me to die here, because I _would_ be dead had it not been for my mother taking a blow meant for me...” Her voice trailed off, the anger quickly giving way to misery. Had it only been two days? It felt like it had been a lifetime, at least... “He tried to have me killed... He turned my family against me... He's taken away my reason for living...” All at once, every wound inflicted on her since that first taste of “freedom” felt raw and infected. The pain seeped inside her, filling her up and hardening into something that encased her bones and made every breath hurt. Her soul hurt.

 

“Nerr...” Perhaps sensing that something was wrong- he couldn't see her, her face was buried in her knees, Silas moved to sit beside her, wrapping one arm around her shoulders. A warm, fraternal gesture Xander would have done had _he_ been the one sitting there. Xander, who had called her a traitor, who demanded she return, hat in hand, to the man who killed everything good and right in her life or else, admit she didn't really love her family... Her family who left her behind in this sordid wasteland because they would not even look at the evidence that their father was a demon... a demon who began all this in the first place... Another emotion that was becoming disturbingly familiar- loathing- began working it's way into the sorrow she felt. She balled her hands into fists, her nails biting into her calloused palms.

 

“...I am dead inside now.” She whispered, almost too quiet to hear herself. Silas could easily ignore her if he wanted to. “He's destroyed me... and I won't rest until I've destroyed him as well.” All her life, Nerr had plans laid out for her; what she was going to do for the day, what she was going to eat, what her goals were. King Garon told her that she was to train and become stronger, and eventually, join the Nohrian army. Once, Xander reminded her that, one day, the king would tell her that she would marry a man she did not know (but was sure she would detest) for the good of the kingdom. She enjoyed it, to an extent; knowing exactly where she was going in life, but she had never made any plans for herself... until today.

 

Suddenly, that vague dream of returning home “some day” solidified into something she could sink her nails in and cling to. Dreams did not come true- that was why they were dreams. She had dreamed of marrying and having a family and living Happily-Ever-After... she'd dreamed that the person she loved might one day love her back... but he was mouldering at the bottom of the Infinite Chasm. Dreams existed to be dashed upon the cold, hard stones of Reality. Hopes, however... she'd hoped to become a solider, to leave the citadel, and she had accomplished those things with hard work. Yes... she could do anything she wanted if she tried hard enough. That thought brought with it a measure of peace, and she allowed herself to sit up marginally straighter. Silas wasn't looking at her, but rather, at the garishly colored clouds.

 

“I suppose my words horrify and disgust a loyal knight such as yourself. You are more than free to leave at any time, my friend. Go; rejoin your soldiers. They probably think you're dead by now.”

“...as I would be were it not for you. This is twice now you've had my life spared, Nerr. I swore I would become a knight for you, to protect you from all those horrible things that you had to stay in the citadel to be safe from... If one of those things is the king himself, then... There's no way I can return to his service. I'll stand by you, my friend, through thick and thin. My loyalty is yours.” He did not know how deeply those words resonated within her. Loyalty... That had always been the core aspect of love in her mind, for how could you love someone if you were not loyal to them? Her heart swelled with affection, and she leaned her head on the cavalier's shoulder.

 

“Thank you, Silas. Truly.”

“Don't mention it. And who knows? Perhaps together, we can bring peace to this world someday.” Nerr laughed, a weary, sobersided chuckle.

“Peace? What do I care for peace when my world has come undone? No, Silas... this is vengeance.” By that time, Jakob had returned, carrying a leather satchel in his hands. She recognized it at once- it was the bag she had packed when she left the citadel, containing only a few of her belongings, because she had been certain she would return home in a matter of weeks at most. She took the dusty, dirty bag from him, untying the drawstring and opening the mouth to look inside. The faded, yellowing cover of _The Prideful Princess_ stared back at her, mocking her with memories of days long gone that could never return. She ran her finger over the brittle paper, closing her eyes to keep her tears at bay.

 

' _And with a whisper that bordered on a laugh, she said, 'Destroy their country; they'll tremble before my wrath'...'_ She would never dream of laying waste to her homeland... but she would revel in destroying the man that ruled it.

000

 

A/N- Man, the first rout chapter where you're not killing water!zombies and ogres.


	3. Synonymous With Guilt

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Ch. 3- “Synonymous With Guilt”

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Nerr had gotten precious little sleep the night before. The overly bright Hoshidan sky definitely played a role in her newfound insomnia, but the fact that every time she closed her eyes, all she saw was _death_ was a much bigger problem. Sometimes, it was her mother, looking up at her with glassy eyes as the holes in her chest spilled blood over her white robes. Mostly, it was that horrible, gut-wrenching look of _terror_ that had been in Gunther's eyes the moment the darkness of the chasm swallowed him whole... Even the instances when the cries of anguish and battered remains of the Nohrian soldiers who'd been slaughtered threatened to wash over her like a wave weren't so bad as _that._ Regardless, the vivid, crimson scenes that played out behind her eyelids left her groggy as the sky began to turn ultramarine once more. It felt as if Rinkah had given her another “bump” on the head, only without the added benefit of knocking her into a coma for gods knew how long. Heaving her bag over her shoulder (she'd been using it as a pillow as she lay on the hard, cold floor), Nerr dragged her feet back towards the entrance of the fort.

 

While she had the basic layout of a plan- return to Nohr and kill King Garon- she had no real idea how she was going to _execute_ it (if she weren't so tired, she'd have slapped herself for such a cheap pun). The best idea that came to her exhaustion addled mind was to get closer to Nohr so that, when the king inevitably waltzed into Hoshido to claim his new throne, she would be ready for him. She did not specify that as the reason for wanting to move further inland when she told Jakob and Silas what she intended to do, but both young men were quite keen on the idea of being closer to their homeland. Despite Jakob's insistence that he did not care where he was, so long as he was at his lady's side, Hoshido was clearly taking a toll on him as well. She could see him recoil when presented with rice for breakfast- what kind of heathens were they _dealing_ with? Nerr did not blame him in the slightest. She had been in Hoshido for almost two weeks, and had only eaten a few meals in all that time, only when her body screamed at her for nourishment. Much of the food left outside her door had turned her stomach, it smelled so odd, and was so visually unappealing... Her body longed for bread, but apparently, such things were quite foreign on this side of the border.

 

She had thought that, perhaps if they found a village by the sea that traded with Nohr, they could eat like humans for a while, but Silas quickly dashed that dream. Hoshido did not trade with Nohr, plain and simple. Despite the high quality goods the western half of the continent had to offer, from strong raw materials to the intricate work of skilled artisans, the east wanted nothing to do with them. Her old friend told her that he'd even heard tell of Hoshidans burning down Nohrian merchant vessels if they dared use their ports. Nerr didn't want to believe that was true. She didn't want to believe that anyone could be that cruel, but the fact was quickly become clear that humans were bastards. Despite being surrounded by Hoshidans, she could not ask them to verify that story. Even if it had happened, even if they had been there and witnessed it first hand, they would lie and say that only Nohrians did things like that. Because only Nohrians were that evil.

 

Well, regardless of what they would or wouldn't find, they needed to get a move on. By the time she'd finished laying out her plan to her fellows, more Hoshidans, healed enough to return home, began leaving the fort. Sakura came out to see a group off, waving to them. Some time during the night, the bodies of the dead Nohrian soldiers had been removed- Nerr made a notable effort to ignore the mound of dirt less than half a mile from the fort, swarming with flies. The stones paving the floor remained bloody, however, and the young princess did her best to tiptoe around the dark splotches. She spotted Nerr, and a smile came to her timid face. As much as the Nohrian girl wished to remain as detached as possible from the entire royal family, she could not help but feel her heart melt a bit at the edges as the girl dashed over to her. How could anyone look upon the face of a sweet little girl and feel anger or hate? Truly, only the most degenerate scum could.

 

“Nee-sama... y-you're up and about a-already, huh? Y-you must really be a morning person...” Jakob quickly turned his laugh into a cough, pounding on his chest for added effect, and she rolled her eyes slightly.

“...it's a learned habit.” That was not entirely a lie. As much as Nerr hated waking up in the ungodly hours of the morning, she had been doing it for over a decade. Gunther always insisted they make use of what little light Nohr was able to salvage from the east... He would probably be very pleased to know she'd woken up entirely on her own... her heart twisted painfully.

 

“U-uhm... don't you want... breakfast? You... you didn't e-eat anything this morning, and it's a l-long march back to the capital...” Oh, that was right; she hadn't told anyone else about her change of plans... it must have slipped her mind. Well, now was as good a time as any. Even though she would be happy to say “good riddance” to Hoshido as a whole, a small part of the Nohrian girl felt unbearably guilty having to tell her very young sister “goodbye”... she wished she were telling this to Azura instead; then she could make as many rude hand gestures as she wanted without feeling bad. Nerr gently placed her hand on the younger girl's shoulder.

 

“I'm not going back to the capital, Sakura.” Sakura's eyebrows furrowed slightly, a small frown pursing her lips. She cringed internally- everyone said _she_ made faces like that when she didn't get her way, but her lips just did that naturally. Surely that wasn't hereditary...

“Wh-what do you mean, nee-sama? Are you-- are you going to stay behind to... guard Fort Jinya?” Oh gods, surely this girl was drawing this out to torment her; she was as devious as the rest of her family, only too adorable and sweet to be resented for it!

“No, Sakura. I'm heading further inland so I can be closer to Nohr.”

“But... _why?_ Y-you're free now, nee-sama- why would you want to be close to the place that hurt you?”

 

' _Hoshido is the place that hurts me...!'_ The words were on the tip of her tongue, but a rustling and the sound of quick footsteps approaching drew her attention. Without thinking about what she was doing, Nerr pushed Sakura behind her, hand going straight to the grip of her Yato. Surely it couldn't be _another_ wave of Nohrian soldiers; Silas had said his battalion had been waiting at the Chasm and had only gone when given the order by Xander. They were the only soldiers still in Hoshido after the withdrawal. Two figures rounded the corner of the fort, one an unpleasantly familiar redheaded shinobi, the other a woman wearing a rather risqué ensemble who's long, mauve hair was coming undone. Both of them were bloodied and covered in dirt and bruises. Sakura gasped aloud and pushed past her sister, rushing over to them. Nerr kept her distance- the last time she had been face to face with this “Size-O”, he'd tried to slit her throat and very nearly succeeded.

 

“Sakura-sama, we've got bad news...” He growled in a deep, rasping voice, his words half muted by the cloth he wore over his face.

“This is an emergency!” The woman's voice was more hysterical, and loud enough that it drew the remaining Hoshidans from the fort. Sakura trembled, her hands fluttering nervously- it was no wonder she always clutched to something to keep them occupied.

“S-Saizou-san, Orochi-san, wh-what happened to y-you...? Y-y-y-you're both wounded...!” The new woman, Orochi, swiped a blob of blood from her cheek with her thumb, wincing as she put pressure on the bruised flesh.

 

“Our wounds are nothing. But as for Ryouma-sama and Takumi-sama--”

“W-what?! What h-h-happened to them?!” Azura approached her sister and began rubbing her back in a soothing, practiced motion, probably used to dealing with these panic attacks. It seemed miraculous the princess hadn't passed out with the way she was breathing.

“They're missing.” The older woman said quietly, her eyes downcast. “We were heading with them to Izumo, but we were ambushed by Nohrians.”

“Those sneaky sons of bitches weren't even trying to put up a fight.” Saizou spat bitterly. “They were just a distraction, with their devil magic and illusions...”

 

“By the time we broke away and the dust had settled, our princes were gone! I... I suppose it's possible they were captured... I hate to think of the alternative...”

“Noooo!” Sakura wailed, sinking to her knees as she tried to suck in a breath through her tears. She was clutching at her chest and shaking her head wildly. “nononononononono....!” Suzukaze knelt beside the princess, pushing her into a seated position and tucking her head between her knees as Azura continued rubbing her back.

“Just breathe, Sakura-sama. That's it, in and out... just breathe deeply...” He looked up at the other shinobi, his face grim. “Saizou, Orochi-san.... things cannot be as grim as you make them out to be. Please, tell me this is some exaggerated joke...” It was clear he was trying to get them to make light of the dark situation for the sake of the hyperventilating princess, but social niceties seemed a foreign concept to Saizou.

 

“Yes, I'm well known for my japes, aren't I?” He seethed, resulting in a moaning wail from Sakura. He ignored her misery, turning away and running a hand through his slicked back hair. With it falling in his face, he almost bore a passing resemblance to Suzukaze. “I blame myself for this... I never should have allowed those anyan devils to separate me from Ryouma-sama's side...” Nerr frowned as the scene continued to unfold before her, turning back to Silas.

 

“I thought you said there weren't any more soldiers in Hoshido...”

“There aren't!” He protested vehemently, a look of something close to fear darkening his eyes. “I swear on my honor, Nerr- my squad was the only one Prince Xander sent, and we were only sent to bring you back. We certainly didn't have any mages; who sends mages into battle?”

“People who need Faceless.” Jakob supplied. “They have to be conjured, remember?” The silver haired knight shook his head.

“No, Prince Xander abhors those abominations... He would never consent to his soldiers using them--”

 

“Who's there?!” Saizou's gruff voice unexpectedly pulled Nerr from their conversation and back to the world at large. The shinobi had pulled out a dagger in the same design as the ones Suzukaze wielded, his singular working eye scanning the copse where they stood, half in shadows. The other shinobi placed a hand on the fiery man's arm, lowering it.

“Calm yourself, brother. It's Nerrida-sama and her retainers.”

“Retainers...?” From a distance, she could see this man (Suzukaze's _brother?_ How was that possible?) narrow his eye as he tried to decipher the shadows he saw, before both- the blue and clouded white- opened wide in realization. “Fucking Nohrians...!” Raising his weapon once more, he charged, but Nerr had seen that coming a mile away. She pulled loose her sword and swung it at the ninja the moment he got close enough. He was nimble, and quick enough to dodge any serious damage, but the edge of the dull bronze blade still sliced deeply into his arm. With his face half concealed, it was difficult to make out his expression, but as he clutched the bleeding wound, she knew he was glaring at her.

 

“You're protecting that filth?! Those are the same dogs responsible for your brothers' disappearance!”

“Seeing as they've been with me this whole time, I don't see how that's likely.”

“Ryouma-sama said any Nohrians found in Hoshido must be put to death!”

“Yeah, well, Ryoma Sama isn't here now, is he- and who's fault is _that?_ ” She hissed, enjoying the infinitesimal flinch she spied. “So you just stay where the hell you are, Hoshidan, if you know what's good for you...” Nerr could hear him grumbling under his breath, probably spouting Hoshidan curse words at her, but she didn't care. Ugh, the sooner she got away from this circus, the better. Saizou's companion, Orochi, also approached, but without the reek of murderous intent.

 

“Pardon me, Nerrida-sama? I am Orochi, the royal diviner and retainer to-- ...to the late Mikoto-sama...” Her voice caught in her throat slightly, and she swallowed hard before speaking again. “It seems that, in the absence of the other royals, leadership falls to you. Yukimura-san is readying troops to send to the border at once, and time is of the essence. You will lead us in search of Ryouma-sama and Takumi-sama, yes?”

“No!” She shouted, recoiling from the other woman and paying the affronted stares she got no heed. “Hells no! _I'm_ not a part of this. You bastards kidnapped me, held me against my will, threatening to _execute_ me when I tried to leave- ask Ryoma Sama about that when you find him... You cut down my countrymen without even entertaining the notion of incapacitating them and letting them live... And now you want my help finding the leader of this travesty you call a country so you can execute all that on a grander scale? Go to hell!”

 

“Nerr, how can you _say_ that?” Azura hissed at her, the anger and disgust plain in her voice. “Your brothers need you--”

“They shouldn't! That's why they have retainers and soldiers; to keep them safe. Is it my fault you people are so incompetent you can't understand the notion of _closely guarding your royalty?_ This clearly isn't the first time this has happened! You two!” She pointed at Hana and Tsubaki, and they flinched under her cold stare. “Where were you when Sakura and Hinoka were being attacked by Faceless last week? Where were Hinoka's retainers? Where were Empress Mikoto's retainers during that attack? You have _one duty;_ keep your liege safe, and you can't even do that? What purpose do you serve, then?” Nerr turned back to Azura. “ _You're_ their sister more than I am. Gather your soldiers and go find them. _I'm_ leaving.”

 

She turned on her heel and began walking, not even waiting to see if Silas and Jakob were following her. They were, she knew it- the alternative was death by angry Hoshidans. Everything about this situation infuriated her. This was exactly why Garon had kept her locked in the Northern Citadel; so someone couldn't just waltz in and assassinate her. Yes, attempts had been made on her sibling's lives, but none had succeeded; they were stronger than her, no one had ever come near _them..._ And they all had retainers, besides. Honestly, prior to two weeks ago, Nerr had never been out of Gunther's sight for more than a few hours. Nohrians understood the concept of “danger”. Hoshidans, living in their idyllic paradise under their magic bubble that kept the enemies at bay, were soft and weak, like some nasty, pale, blind thing that crawled out from under a rock. Well, let them enjoy their burning, blazing sun without any protection now. As she continued to walk, the plains where the last great battle had been fought just visible over the horizon, a tiny sob reached her ears, quiet enough that she could ignore it if she wanted to... She paused, but continued walking, another, louder sob sending a shudder down her spine. This time, she stopped completely.

 

“Nerr? What's wrong?” Silas had caught up to her, but Nerr did not answer, turning around and looking back at the scene she had left. Sakura was still on the ground, tears spilling as quickly as she wiped them away. Azura, Suzukaze, and both her retainers were attempting to console her, but to no avail. It was a pitiful sight. It made her sick. ...how loudly would Elise wail if Xander and Leo were just _gone_ one day? Those blood-curdling shrieks would haunt anyone who heard them till their dying day... These people were her enemy; everything that had happened thus far, to both themselves and her, had been their fault, but... That was her sister weeping on the ground for her lost brothers. Her little sister, who had done nothing to deserve such anguish... Nerr's head felt like it was splitting in half, every thud of her heart as she turned and walked back driving the wedge deeper into her skull. She stopped a few feet from Sakura.

 

“Don't cry, Sakura. Your brothers are fine.” Sniffling, the girl looked up, her face bright red and wet.

“B-b-but--”

“Even if they were captured, they're fine. Nohrians don't execute prisoners of war. I'm certain this has all been a big misunderstanding. I'll find them and clear everything up.” She made it sound so easy, so simple, but that was her job; everything was supposed to be effortless for older siblings. Wiping her nose on her sleeve, a spark of hope lit within the young princess's eyes.

“Oh... N-Nerrida nee-sama, do you-- do you mean it?”

“Yes. Everything will be fine, Sakura. I promise you.” She let out a watery laugh, and climbed to her feet, brushing the dust and dirt from her skirt.

 

“Th-then, I'm coming w-w-with you!” Suzukaze was on his feet at once.

“Sakura-sama, I strongly recommend that you reconsider that course of action. The area near the border is highly dangerous and--”

“I don't care!” She yelled, stamping her foot and looking every inch the child she was in that moment. “You say that as if-- as if it's safe _here!_ We-we were attacked last night! E-even in the capital, we're not safe! I can't-- I can't just stay here and do _nothing..._ If there's something, a-anything I can do to help my brothers, I-- I need to be in position to... to do so...” Even as her rant continued, she seemed to be losing both steam and confidence in her words, which was just as well.

 

“I'm sorry, Sakura, but I'm afraid I agree with Backstabber, here.” Nerr said solemnly. “You have no way of defending yourself, and I trust your retainers about as far as I can throw them. You'd just be a liability.” The youngest princess flinched violently at those harsh words, but she didn't care. They were the truth, and it was better that the girl get her feelings hurt than get her throat slit.

“Nerr... Sakura just lost her mother, and even her brothers are missing. It's understandable that she would want to accompany us.” Crimson eyes narrowed as she turned to glare at the songstress. It was like everything that came out of her mouth just _had_ to be contrary- if Nerr said the sky was blue, Azura would counter that it was red. “With my help, I believe we can provide adequate protection for her...”

 

“ _What_ help? You can't do a damn thing, Azura.” She sneered, not even bothering to conceal her vitriol. “What can you lend to a battle; _singing_ your enemies into submission? But you know what? Do whatever you'd like. Bring an unarmed child with no combat experience onto the battlefield- I'm sure _that'll_ work out just fine.” She turned back to her younger sister, who had shied away from her. “Sakura. You might _die_ out there. There is a war going on, and you are the enemy. Is this really what you want?” The rose-haired girl shivered, wrapping her arms tight around herself.

“I... I don't want t-to die... But... I don't want to stay behind and-- and wait for news to reach me, e-either...”

“Then, short of knocking you unconscious and locking you up, I can't stop you.” Nerr looked back to her retainer and friend. “There's been a slight change in plans. First, we find these pathetic excuses for princes, _then_ we head to the border.” Jakob bowed deeply.

 

“Your wish is ever my command, Lady Nerr.” Silas chuckled slightly.

“I didn't think I'd be pressed into service _this_ quickly... I haven't even finished my squire training, yet.” The Nohrian princess felt her lips quirk into a mirthless smile. So first, she needed to figure out where Izumo was and-- The sight of dark red hair, and a hate-filled blue eye filled her vision, and she stepped back so Saizou fully came into view.

“Yes? Did you need something?”

 

“You can't be serious, Nerrida. You'd really allow this backstabbing, Nohrian _scum_ to accompany us?” Everything about this horrible, hateful man filled her with burning hot rage. The frustration that had been mounting nonstop had finally reached it's peak, and she allowed herself a moment to vent some of it. Drawing her arm back, she smashed the heel of her palm against the older man's face, right into his scarred, blind eye. She felt the flesh give, the bone crack slightly under the pressure of the blow, and as he stumbled back, both hands clutching at his bruising flesh, she shoved him even further, knocking him to the dirt.

 

“Don't you _ever_ address me so familiarly again. It seems to keep slipping your tiny, savage mind, but I am a gods damned _princess_. Were I still in Nohr, I would let your disrespect slide, but because of your worthless prince and even more worthless brother, I'm _not._ I am in my apparent 'homeland', and I am helping you people, so you will show me the respect I'm due or you will regret it. And perhaps, if you were less concerned with what _I'm_ doing and more attentive to Ryoma Sama, he wouldn't be missing in the _first place..._ ” Back in Nohr, she never called anyone out for addressing her informally... but, that was because no one did. Everyone in the citadel called her “Lady Nerr” or “Milady”... Gunther always addressed her as “My Lady”, stressing the emphasis of those two words for her alone (Camilla and Elise were always “milady”)... She knew exactly what Saizou was doing; he was making it clear she was no royalty to him, nothing but a Nohrian dog to be put down, but she would not tolerate that when she was trying to help the miserable waste of breath. Suzukaze was quick to defend, not his brother, but Nerr.

 

“This is not your call, nii-san. Nerrida-sama has the right to chose whatever retainers she so pleases... even Nohrians. Besides, what would you have us do; murder capable, loyal soldiers simply because they don't look like you? That is not the Hoshidan way.”

“Don't think you're helping, Backstabber.” She told him bitterly. “I don't need your help making my point.” The mottled purple that was swelling Saizou's face only served to make him uglier in his anger as he once again stood upright.

“Is the Hoshidan way to allow a potential spy access to our party?”

 

“What party? All four of you? Yes, I'm certain _sooo_ many secrets will be gleaned from this political think-tank. If you were capable of doing anything, you'd have already assembled a group of soldiers and started hunting down your wayward liege by now; the only thing a spy could report about you is that you're absolutely no threat because you don't know what you're doing.” At that moment, she was certain the redheaded shinobi was going to jump on her and pay her back in kind for her blow, but she was ready for that. She'd spent years rough housing with boys- Leo didn't pull any punches just because she was a girl. Suzukaze once again stepped in to placate his brother's ire.

 

“Nii-san, Nerrida-sama spared my life when I was a prisoner in Nohr. She could have easily stood back and watched both Rinkah-sama and myself die, but she put her own life in danger to save ours. If she was willing to do that as an enemy, then I think we can trust her as an ally.” Saizou scoffed loudly.

“Oh, please. A five-year old wouldn't be fooled by such an obvious setup. Anyone with a modicum of sense would realize that was a _ploy_ to get you to think she was harmless so you would bring her to the castle instead of killing her on sight like you should have.”

“Saizou-san, stop it!” Sakura had been quiet the whole time, pressing her hands to her ears at one point to try and block out the hateful words being shouted, but she tore them away now. “Th-that's my sister you're talking about, a-a princess of Hoshido! You-- you can't say things like that!” The shinobi's one good eye softened ever so slightly as he looked upon the youngest royal.

 

“I'm sorry, Sakura-sama... but _someone_ has to say these things. This... _girl_ was raised by the enemy as a tool to ensure our destruction... frankly, it's worrying that only Takumi-sama has the sense to realize someone in that position is not to be trusted.”

“Clearly, _you're_ the smart one in the family, one-eye.” Nerr chimed in, much to everyone's surprise. She was no fool- she could recognize pragmatism when she saw it. Indeed, Leo was constantly trying to drill into her head the need to think situations through coldly and objectively. Certainly, her little brother would be on Saizou's side. “It's nice to know that, for all your many shortcomings, at least _someone_ has the good of their kingdom in mind. But don't think for a moment that I give a damn about your opinion of me. I don't trust you either, you Hoshidan savage, what with you trying to kill me the first time we met and all. If you want to keep me at arm's length, that's fine by me; I'll gladly do the same.” Azura cleared her throat slightly.

 

“Instead of spending so much time arguing about who trusts whom less, we _need_ to organize our search party and press on. Every second counts.”

“Oh my gods, Azura, I will _slap_ you...” The fact that the songstress was right did nothing to make her any less angry.

000

 

To get from Shirasagi to the duchy Ryouma and Takumi had been en route to, they needed to go beyond Fort Jinya, trekking through a massive cave system known to the locals as The Eternal Stairway. As much as Nerr appreciated the soothing darkness of the cave, it was much less a “stairway” than a steep incline sandwiched between two deep crevasses. A morbid curiosity overtook her, and she looked down into the impenetrable black. She wondered if it just went on forever, into the bowels of the earth, or if it grew narrower, so that if a body fell in, it would get stuck, tightly wedged in the wet, slimy stone unable to move until it decomposed and the bones mouldered to dust. Orochi stepped up to her, a slight smile tugging at her lips.

 

“You shouldn't stare into the abyss, Nerrida-sama; you never know what might be staring back.”

“I'm assuming it's ghosts.” She said plainly, tearing her eyes away from the darkness nonetheless. Her late mother's retainer giggled slightly.

“Oh, you'd be right, milady. The Eternal Stairway is notorious for claiming lives.”

 

“That's right.” Azura chimed in from further ahead. She pointed to a large wooden marker with strange symbols painted onto it's mildew-slicked surface. Nerr had seen more of those further back, but had no idea what they were. “All these ofuda are for the people who were _known_ to have died here. One can only imagine how many ghosts linger, unmissed and unmourned...” There was the slightest hint of joy in the songstress's voice as she said that, as if the thought of being surrounded by ghosts tickled her pink. Sakura cried out in fear and clutched tighter to her sister's side.

 

“N-nee-sama, stop! It's too scary...!” Silas chuckled a bit at the young girl's reaction, though Jakob remained silent, his hands balled into slightly shaking fists. He had always hated being told anything of a remotely macabre nature, though Nerr had been disgustingly entranced when Gunther told them about the flue fakers that went missing in the castle- imagine, getting stuck in a chimney and starving to death in there! The darkness drew her gaze back, and she felt her stomach sink to the ground... Thinking of someone slowly dripping onto the floor wasn't so amusing when she could put a face to the putrefying remains... The princess shook her head slightly.

 

“No one goes unmourned, Azura... Everyone is missed by someone...”

“Nerrida-sama, please be quiet for a moment.” Suzukaze's quiet request bothered her. She hadn't even spoken loudly.

“Oh, Azura can talk but I can't?”

“No, that's not it... I hear something...” All the footsteps stopped in tandem, and the silence grew heavy. Nerr could hear many things, water dripping from the stalactites on the cave ceiling, the quiet sputter of enchanted torches lining the walkway, even the faint squeak of bats high above their heads. Frowning, she closed her eyes, hoping that the lack of sensory information might help her hone in on whatever was suddenly so threatening. There was a sound, almost too faint even for her ears, far below them. It almost sounded like...

 

“...whispering? Are those people talking?”

“We're being watched.” Saizou rasped, pulling a dagger from the holster at his hip. Watched by whom, Nerr wanted to ask, but this was no time to care. She pulled her Yato free of it's ties, readying her stance. The green-haired shinobi stepped forward, holding a fistful of shuriken.

“Attention!” He called out, his voice bouncing off the walls and resulting in a chorus of Suzukazes that spoke with him. “Whoever you are! Show yourself now if you wish to avoid conflict!” There was a long, tense pause... before loud growls and roars filled the cavern, a veritable menagerie of animal sounds. From behind one of the outcroppings of rock that stood in the middle of the so-called stairway, a group of several Faceless appeared, throwing their leather covered heads back and roaring. Nerr's heart seized in her chest.

 

“How can Faceless be here?”

“I don't know,” Suzukaze readied his throwing stars, taking aim. “Normally, these beasts aren't intelligent enough to hide their presence...”

“Who care how smart they are; let's take 'em out!” Rinkah charged forward, mace in hand, and leapt up, smashing the bronze weight into one of the hulking beast's faces. The others cried out their approval and charged as well. Nerr drove the Yato's blade into one of the monster's gut, pulling down and tearing through the thick, mottled skin with ease. Slimy ropes of entrails slipped onto the ground at her feet, but it was not accompanied by the stench of rot and decay she had smelled before. All she smelled now... was blood. The thick, metallic tang of blood that filled her nostrils so completely she could _taste_ it, just like she had smelled back in Krakenburg as she laid waste to the captured Hoshidans.

 

The Faceless were not putting up the same fight she had seen before, either. They did not swing their massive, calloused fists, trying to smash or squish the soldiers cutting them down. One seemed to actually put it's hands up in a defensive gesture as Tsubaki dragged his lance across it's torso. Another turned and began running back down the slope as Orochi pulled out a handful of thin wooden slates, strange runs glowing at her feet as she spread them like a fan. A small, ghostly apparition- a rat, it seemed- materialized, running through the air and charging through beast's back. Frost spread over the point of impact, the green flesh turning black as it froze and mortified, and the hideous monster fell face first. It only took a matter of minutes before every last beast had fallen, and the Hoshidan looked proud of what they'd done. Nerr would not have cared either way, but she could not shake the feeling that this was not right.

 

“Lady Nerr? What is it?” Jakob bent to retrieve one of his daggers sticking out from the thick folds of a fallen Faceless's neck.

“Don't you smell that?”

“Smell what?”

“All I smell is the blood of my enemies.” Rinkah proclaimed proudly, and the princess frowned deeply.

“Yes, that's exactly the problem. Faceless don't smell like this- they smell like rotting meat. This... this is fresh blood.”

“Nerr, what are you talking about? Doesn't death just smell like... death?” She shook her head, frowning at the other princess.

 

“No. Something is very wrong with this situation.” Kneeling down, Nerr heaved one of the Faceless onto it's back. Despite it's sheer bulk, it was not as heavy as it looked. In fact, it didn't seem so large anymore either. It seemed the monster was shrinking, the air around it shimmering slightly- not just with this body, but with all of them. Slowly, the massive, bulging limbs shrank into smaller, more familiar anatomy, their leather masks taking on the color and texture of smooth, uncured skin... The gasps rang out in unison at the sight of a group of clearly Hoshidan corpses laying dead at their feet.

 

“Oh gods!! Th-these aren't Faceless; they're p-p-people! Oh, wh-what have we d-d-d-done...?!” Sakura backed away from the grisly scene, shaking like a leaf in a storm. Azura had covered her mouth with her hands, her voice coming out muffled as a result.

“Look at their clothing; I think these people are from the Wind Tribe...” To Nerr, all Hoshidan clothing looked the same, though these bodies did seem to be wearing slightly more by way of ornamentation. She got back up, shaking her head as though to deny the madness unfolding before her.

“No... This can't be possible; a moment ago, these people were _Faceless_ \- I'm not crazy, you all saw it too!” Everyone nodded quietly. “How is this possible?!” A deep, smarmy chuckle resounded through the cave, filling every nook and cranny and making the fine hairs on the back of Nerr's neck stand on edge. She raised her bloody sword. “Who's there! Show yourself at once, or I'll cut you down, too!” The laughter seemed to concentrate, and a flash of light a foot or so from her eyes blinded the princess, sending her stumbling back. She might well have fallen off the side of the slope had Jakob not caught her. Squeezing her eyes tight to try and combat the after image of that brilliant light, she opened them slightly, slitted pupil narrowing as she took in the unpleasantly familiar sight of a pale man in dark robes. Even in the low light of the cave, the golden embellishments on his clothes glinted, the headdress he wore appearing as a sickening mockery of a halo.

 

“Good day, princess. You're looking well.”

“Iago!” She spat, charging towards him, fully intent on driving her sword through his gut- this was his fault as much as it was Garon's and Hans', her being here, Gunther being dead... Before the blade could reach anything vital, however, ancient runes filled the air around the man, and he vanished in a cloud of slightly acrid smoke, only to appear behind her. By that point, everyone's weapons were trained on him, but Iago only had an eye for her.

“My my, so volatile- these Hoshidans have been a terrible influence on you. It's a good thing you made the right choice to stay with your own kind, you byak whore- we couldn't allow this kind of savage behavior in Nohr.”

 

“Why don't you come a little closer, and I'll show you just how savage my behavior can be!”

“Now now, there will be time for empty threats later. Tell me, did you enjoy my little slight of hand? It sure seems like you had fun, tearing these yellow bastards out of existence.”

“That was _you?!”_ Azura gasped affronted. Iago barely spared her a glance, his lips turning down.

“Excuse you, slut; no one is speaking to you. This is between me and our beloved Lady Nerr.” Nerr shook her head slightly.

 

“...what do you have to gain by doing this?” His smile came back full force.

“Oh, you mean aside from sowing the seeds of discontent and laughing when your own people decide to finally lynch you? You have no idea how happy your _decision_ made me, princess; pretending to be on your side, smiling to your face when you were considered Nohrian royalty made me _sick._ Now? Now that you're back where you belong, I can set to work erasing every last one of you mistakes off the face of the earth. Oh, there's never been a finer time to be a _real_ Nohrian. Your demise is nigh, you byak bastards, and I will enjoy doing everything I can to personally ensure your suffering is drawn out as long as possible.” With another flash of light, he vanished, not even a mocking laugh as goodbye.

 

“N-Nerrida nee-sama... who _was_ that m-maniac? I-it sounded like you know him...”

“That's a very good question, Sakura-sama; _do_ you know that maniac, Nerrida- _sama?_ ” The way Saizou spat out that last part, he might as well have called her 'Rancid Whore-sama'. Nerr glared at him.

“What- after hearing that spiel, you honestly think that dastard is on _my_ side? So much for you being smart... I know him in passing. That's Duke Iago, Father's advisor and, apparently, right-hand man if he's being sent to torment me personally. I didn't know he was capable of this sort of thing... The illusory magic, I mean; he's always been good at screwing me over.” She did not elaborate on that- that was nothing Hoshidans needed to know about. Judging by the look on Jakob's face, he knew exactly what she was talking about. “He probably made us appear as Faceless to these people as well; that's why they tried to run rather than fight back.”

“Well, he did do us one favor; he revealed himself as an enemy.” Azura was pointedly looking away from the corpses slowly growing cold. “I'm sure we'll have to go through him to get to King Garon as the war progresses, but this leaves us in an unfortunate position, to say the least. The route ahead takes us straight through Kazeho.” Nerr shrugged haplessly, having no idea what that had to do with anything. Orochi filled her in.

 

“Kazeho is the land belonging to the Wind Tribe... the people these villagers we just... killed... belong to.” Oh, that certainly _was_ a problem. The blunette princess spoke up once more.

“We're going to have a hard time explaining what just happened to their chieftain...”

“So we don't explain it.” Nerr said simply, wishing she felt as calm as she sounded. In reality, her heart was throwing itself against her ribs. She leaned down and began wiping her blade on the robes of one of the dead villagers.

“What are you talking about, Nerr?”

 

“We just push these corpses into the crevasse, like so...” Grabbing a disturbingly limp hand, the Nohrian girl began dragging the body over to the side of the stairway, one last heave sending it plummeting into the darkness. It made her insides twist, watching someone else be swallowed by that all consuming black, but she forced herself to not feel that at the moment, turning back to her horrified comrades. “And lo and behold, we were never here! Jakob, Silas; help me get these hole-filled bodies into this hole.”

“That's disgusting!” Saizou roared at her, clearly saying what everyone else was only thinking. “Don't they teach you monster how to respect the dead in Nohr?!” Nerr leveled him with an icy, hateful stare.

 

“...so I should give them a proper burial... you mean, like the lovely mass, shallow grave you all dumped those poor Nohrian soldiers into? Should I respect the dead like _that?_ ” She walked back, grabbed another body, and hurled it into the ravine, feeling much less guilt as it hit the opposite wall with a soft thud before falling in. “If you're so wracked with guilt, Size-o, go confess what you did to their chieftain. I'm sure you'll be absolved in death.” The Hoshidans said nothing, walking on in a tense silence while Nerr and her fellow Nohrians continued disposing of the bodies. Didn't those ungrateful dastards understand she was doing this for _their_ sake as well? They had all played a role in this travesty right alongside her, yet tried to act self righteous when she sought to clean up their mess. She was containing the situation; what more did they _want_ from her?

000

 

As they finally exited the cave, it seemed likely that two separate groups were simply heading in the same direction, the Hoshidans all huddled together on one side, while the Nohrians stood close together on the other. None of the Hoshidans even looked at her, save Sakura, who gave Nerr furtive glances, quickly looking away when she was spotted. The girl hadn't been afraid of her when she was promising to get her brothers back, but it seemed that was how Hoshidans were. They adored you as long as they had a use for you. They had been talking amongst themselves, asking how they would approach the village.

 

Silas asked her the same thing in a hushed tone. Well, she was a Hoshidan princess, right- that was what everyone said. What did she have to fear from one of her empire's duchies? They would go straight through, she said, loudly enough for the Hoshidans to hear. If they wanted to follow her, that was fine. If they decided to go their own way, that was fine too. The two groups continued walking, giving one another a wide berth, until they reached a strange, red arch. Nerr had seen a similar arch both near Shirasagi, and as she'd left the Flame Tribe's territory (had that really not even been a month ago?). Tall mountains cast a shadow over the land, and strong gusts of wind powered the numerous windmills that dotted the landscape.

 

“This is the Wind Tribe's main village.” Suzukaze said softly, his voice nearly lost on the wind. It took a moment for Nerr to realize he was speaking to _her._ “Are you certain you wish to approach it directly, milady?”

“If I could avoid this place in it's entirety, I'd do so in an instant, but as I cannot, we may as well face it head on. Trying to sneak around will only serve to make us look suspicious...”

“Tsk. Nohrians certainly wouldn't want _that_ reputation...” Saizou scoffed. The Nohrian girl was about to turn and give him a piece of her mind, when two people in similar robes to those who had been killed ran out through the gates. One held a large club, the other a handful of wooden scrolls similar to Orochi's.

 

“Here they are! The savages who attacked our people!” The one holding the scrolls fanned them out, the sand at his feet already glowing.

“Prepare to die, monsters!” Nerr's blood ran cold. How could they know- there was no one left in that cave alive, no one who could have run and told- they would have noticed.

“We did nothing wrong!” She blurted out without thinking. “It was a Nohrian mage!” The man holding the club scoffed, taking aim as though he were getting ready to take a swing at her head.

 

“Please. How stupid do you think we are?”

“Oh, this is going well...” Suzukaze muttered under his breath, moving to stand between Sakura and the infuriated tribalists. Nerr glared daggers at him.

“Shut up. Jump in and help at any time, or S _hut. Up._ ” She was in no mood for anyone's sass, not when she was wracking her mind trying to figure out how anyone knew what had happened. It didn't make any sense, unless Iago had somehow given them the message. Why he would work with Hoshidans was a mystery, considering how much he clearly loathed them as a species, but “the enemy of my enemy”, and all that... The middle princess did not have long to ponder the situation before Sakura pushed her way to the front of the crowd.

 

“Umh, e-excuse me, please... M-m-may I have everyone's, umm... a-attention?”

“Sakura, what are you doing? Get back!” The young princess ignored her panicked command, looking up at the tribalists.

“P-please forgive us. We are s-so s-s-sorry to have h-hurt you people, b-b-but! You must understand; th-they appeared before us as-- as Faceless!” Both men lowered their weapons slightly, shock battling disbelief on their faces.

“Sakura-sama? You're _with_ these brigands?”

“Yeah, what's going on here?” Perhaps bolstered by the fact that they were not going to attack while a young child was in front of them, Azura stepped forward as well.

 

“Yes, as am I. And what my sister says is the truth; this travesty was the work of a Nohrian mage.” The heavily muscled man lowered his club entirely.

“Azura-sama is with them, too! Maybe they _are_ telling the truth...”

“Hold that thought.” His companion seemed much more reluctant to drop _his_ weapon. “Have you considered that _this_ might be a trap? After all, there are at least three Nohrians _with_ them.”

 

“Hmmm... you're right... But either way, we can't make this decision ourselves. Let's see what Fuuga-sama has to say.” That must have been their leader. Nerr had been taught to handle diplomatic situations since she was a child, though she'd never had a chance to put that theory into practice. It could not be that difficult, though. Surely, no one was more frightening to speak to than King Garon himself, and she had faced him while he was contemplating executing her.

“Very well. I would be happy to speak to your Fuuga Sama.” The mage (she assumed he was a mage) laughed, finally lowering his weapon, though a dark glee shone in his eyes.

 

“ 'Speak'? Bwahahaha! Somehow, I don't think that's what the chieftain will have in mind.”

“Remain here until we speak to Fuuga-sama, beasts. Take one step towards out village, and we'll put you down like the savage animals you are.” Nerr watched them walk back to their village, talking to one another and occasionally laughing coldly. She already did not like how this was playing out.

 

“What is the meaning of this; what's going on?”

“Most likely, they're planning on some trial by combat.” Rinkah said, almost bored by her tone. The princess rounded on her.

“ _Trial by combat?_ ” The dark skinned woman nodded.

“We do something similar in the Flame Tribe- not that these windbags can compare to our strength. Whoever is telling the truth will win; the righteousness of their conviction makes them strong.”

 

“That is the most bullshit I have ever heard.” Jakob scoffed. “Why am I not surprised that 'might makes right' when it comes to savages...”

“Hey! You wanna say that again, you filthy anyan dog?” Their resident tribalist was already swinging her mace, the air around her shimmering as it grew hotter. The butler was hardly impressed by the display.

“With pleasure. I _said--_ ”

“That's enough, Jakob. You too, Rinkah- save your 'conviction' for the people who are going to try and execute us.”

“We need to tread carefully and make sure not to hurt anyone more than necessary.” Azura muttered. “We're already in a vulnerable position; we don't need to compound this by racking up even _more_ casualties.”

 

“ _You're_ not in any danger. Neither is Sakura; these people know who _you_ are, it seems. How is that?” The songstress looked away from her cold stare.

“...We've visited Kazeho before... the entire royal family has.”

“Then why the hell aren't you going in there and straightening things out with their leader?! This is the _one_ thing you could do to be helpful, Azura, and you're going to just sit back and take it easy?”

“It's not as easy as you might think, Nerr.” She snapped back. “Haven't you ever heard of guilt by association? I'm with you, so that makes me just as guilty of the crimes they're condemning you for. Chief Fuuga wouldn't listen to either of us.”

“You could always _try..._ ” Azura said nothing in response to that, and though Nerr had won this round, it did nothing to make her feel better.

000

 

Aside from the howling winds and sand blowing into everyone's eyes, there were no real obstacles on the battlefield, not even the Wind Tribe's soldiers. There were only about two dozen of them, and while there were less than ten people in Nerr's retinue, this still didn't fill her with fear the way some battles did. Perhaps it was this open, brightly lit plane, or the fact that she could charge forward on four legs, horns lowered, and send the Hoshidans scrambling for their lives. The sense of power being a dragon gave her almost made up for the agony of feeling her bone snap and reform themselves into something alien. Trudging along in the burning hot sand was not easy, though. While her thick hide in this form did not suffer from the heat as much as her human soles might, with every step, she sank deeper into the sand, as though it were water. She had tried splaying her claws out, rather than walking on her knuckles as she instinctively did, but that felt too awkward.

 

Sakura, one of the few people who seemed unimpeded by the terrain, had spotted a Dragon Vein, lifting her hands high and channeling the power flowing through the earth. The sand beneath them seemed to freeze, no longer shifting and giving way under their weight. Capable of running without stumbling now, Hana dashed forward, slashing at the thick biceps of a muscular tribalist, blood mingling with the sweat running over the contours of his body. It was amazing how these Hoshidans could hold back when they were facing their own kind. A voice- no, several voices, having a conversation- in the west drew her attention. A familiar figure, who she knew was clad in red and white despite her monochrome vision, upon a snowy pegasus was yelling at two people, one who was up to their hips in the sand, the other trying halfheartedly to pull them out. Azura's words from before came back to her mind- the leader of the tribe knew the Royal family. Even if a certain lazuline-haired singer was too much of a coward to speak up for them, the second princess would. The tingling burn of magic on her flank drew Nerr's attention back to the mage that was now realizing how little her spell affected this creature. She kicked out with her back leg, catching the woman in the chest and sending her flying backwards. Changing course, she loped over to the elder princess, who's steed startled at the sight of the beast approaching it.

 

“Whoa, boy! Don't get spooked. It's just Nerr-chan.” It was Nerr _who?_ There was no time to puzzle the Hoshidan language.

“ _Ho, Hinoka. I don't know what you're doing here, but--”_

“I could say the same to you! You're supposed to be at Fort Jinya; why did you drag Sakura so far from the capital?” The accusation in her voice tinged the gray edges of Nerr's vision red.

“ _Why the hell didn't_ you _deign to keep an eye on her if you're so worried? I thought you were in the capital!”_ Hinoka bit her lip, a shadow of fear passing over her face.

 

“...I was. I got a bad feeling, and decided to try and catch up with Ryouma and Takumi... I was trying to flank them.”

“ _Well, you're too late. It seems they already got flanked, and now they're missing--”_

“What?! NO! That's not-- That can't-- What happened to them, Nerrida?” Oh, so now she was Nerrida again...

“ _How the hell should I know_?” The draconic princess snapped in her mind. “ _In case you forgot, you all ran off without inviting anyone else to your party- thank you for leaving us alone to contend with the Nohrian soldiers that ambushed us, by the way. You're REALLY good at this 'big sister' thing... And besides, I have my own problems to deal with at the moment.”_ The Hoshidan woman flinched slightly at her cold words. It was a disgrace; Camilla would never _dream_ of leaving Elise alone with incompetent retainers.

 

“...yeah... yeah I guess you're right. On both counts... I thought the Wind Tribe was neutral; why are you all fighting?”

“ _This is the first I've heard of any sort of neutrality. And we're fighting because a certain sister of yours won't tell the chieftain that we're not their enemy. That's where you come in. You need to fly over there, and talk some sense into him.”_ For a moment, Nerr wondered if she, too, would refuse, too worried about “guilt by association” to take a chance to stop the fighting, but the elder princess nodded firmly.

“Alright. But I don't know what's going on- you need to come with me, Nerrida. ...not like that, though; you're freaking Kinka out.” She could only assume “Kinka” was the name of the pegasus she rode, and it was true- the beast's eyes were budging out as it continued struggling to get away from the dragon before it.

 

Sighing, Nerr mentally released her hold on her dragonstone- it was strange that thinking about actions was what made them happen in this form- her bones shrinking, skin becoming supple once more as her claws and horns retracted back into her flesh. Finally calm enough to control, Hinoka landed her steed, offering her sister a hand. Nerr pointedly ignored it; she didn't need help getting up, she'd been riding horses since she could remember. Besides, this delicate-looking creature was nowhere near as daunting as Caractacus had been, and with a bit of practice, she had learned to climb onto the massive charger's saddle unaided as well. Her eyes stung as she settled herself behind the princess, and it was easy to pretend it was all due to the sand in them. It _was_ a bit startling as the massive wings, each longer than she was tall, unfurled on either side of her. They beat against the air, and in no time, gained enough lift to move forward. Even though the pegasus moved it's feet in time to it's wing-beats, a canter, if she wasn't mistaken, there was no impact other than the gentle rise and fall with every flap. Even their _horses_ didn't offer than a challenge- this was _nothing_ like galloping over hard land... Nerr looked down. They were about twenty or so feet off the ground. With his back to the mountains behind him, a single man was not joining the fray, rather, watching it with his arms crossed over his barrel chest.

 

“That's Fuuga-sama.” Hinoka informed her.

“Then land. We need to talk.” Nerr did not wait for the pegasus (Kinka, her mind reminded her in a chiding voice) to touch down, jumping from the saddle when it was still a good five or so feet in the air. But that was nothing; years of boredom in the citadel had taught her to jump from landings, and years of breaking her legs had taught her how to tuck and roll so as to lessen the impact on her bones. Her dented armor dug into her flesh, and sand clung uncomfortably to her sweat slicked skin and hair, but she got back to her feet. The massive, mountain of a man stared at her, his face cold and impassive, though there was a glint of something bordering amusement in his golden eyes.

 

“So you've made it this far...” He said, his voice surprisingly quiet in contrast to his appearance- truly, it looked as if every inch of him was sculpted of rock hard muscle. She could see a sword hanging at his side.

“You're Chief Fuuga, yes? Please, allow me to explain--”

“No.” He shot her request down coldly. “You must _earn_ the right to explain. You've acted as a coward; show me you at least _fight_ with honor.” His words chilled her to the bone- not the accusation in his tone, but the fact that _he knew..._ How was that possible, who told them what _happened?_ She was so caught up in her thoughts that she barely noticed the chieftain coming at her, only throwing her sword up at the last moment to block his own. Though the impact of the blade had been blocked, a sudden gust of wind knocked her back and she stumbled, hitting the ground. Fuuga used that brief drop in her guard, driving his curved blade towards her head.

 

Drawing a sharp breath in through her teeth, she planted her hands on the gritty stone and kicked her legs over her head, flipping back just as the blade slammed into the ground where she'd been sitting. She crouched down, staring at the fractures branching out from the point of impact, imagining what would've become of her skull had that attack connected. Rinkah had said that, to these kinds of people, telling the truth meant you were strong enough to win. She had nothing to hide. She had done nothing wrong- her only sin had been trying to protect the ungrateful Hoshidans she traveled with. Gritting her teeth, Nerr leapt back to her feet, tightening her grip on the Yato's ribbed handle and charging at the older man. He blocked her attacks with ease, but she was quicker than him, agile enough to strike multiple times for his every swing.

 

Aiming low, she raked her blade across his shin, the wrappings keeping his baggy trousers in place falling away as the white cloth below blossomed with blood. She heard his sharp intake of breath, but it did nothing to stop him. In that instant, before she could straighten and block, Fuuga drove his sword into her left arm, the upper part of her bicep where her rerebrace did not reach. Nerr could not bite back the scream that tore itself from her throat as the blade sank deep into the muscle, severing blood vessels and nerves that set her aflame, even scraping the bone as it came through the other side. Hot blood gushed from the wound, soaking into her filthy blouse and causing the black linen to stick to her skin.

 

“If this is all the strength you can muster, than you are every bit the filthy coward I thought you to be.” Nerr was not a coward; she was a brave, Nohrian princess, and she would not let some Hoshidan savage try to convince her otherwise.

“I'm not done yet!” She hissed, dropping her Yato and reaching up to grab the false edge of his blade.

 

Every cell in her body seemed to scream in agony as the steel slid, centimeter by torturous centimeter, back out of her arm. With no pressure being exerted against the shredded flesh, the gaping hole bled more profusely, but that would not be enough to stop her. She grabbed her blade quickly, deflecting the incoming blow Fuuga aimed at her with a riposte, slashing at him twice. The first was mostly deflected by the black and gold plackart he wore, but the second cut deep into his pectorals, splitting the skin so neatly she could see the fibers of his muscles before blood began oozing thickly from the wound. He stumbled back, and a sharp kick to the gut was enough to knock him down. Their blood splattered on the floor, mixing together and coating the gritty stones. She could put her foot on his throat to keep him down, drive her blade through his gut- _that_ would prove she was right in his eyes, but... The Yato seemed heavier in her grasp. Everything was beginning to blur around the edges... she was so tired... Just as she herself stumbled back, a voice called out to her.

 

“Nerr! What are you doing, stop it!”

“Nerrida, that's enough!” Hinoka had dismounted her steed, and was joined by Azura in running up to them. What _she_ was doing was enough... bitterly, she realized that, with her black clothes, they could not see the extent of her injury.

“Let's-- ugh... Let's ask Chief Fuuga if he... if he shares your, uhhh.... opinion.” She looked back down at the man who was currently getting back to his feet, though not without some difficulty. She had to admire his fortitude. “Am I strong enough for you? Am I-- am I telling you the truth?” He paused for a moment, his hazel eyes appraising her intently.

 

“...indeed. I suppose I should not have underestimated one who carries the sacred Yatogami.” Standing upright, he winced slightly, a slight groan escaping his lips as he reached up to try and apply pressure to his wounds. “Now, I will gladly hear an explanation for your unprovoked attack on my people... But first, we will go to my castle, Reppu. Our injuries are severe, and bleeding to death like fools is no show of strength.” Truly, that was the most sensible thing she'd heard out of this man's mouth thus far.

“Huh? Wait, what? What injuries? Nerrida...” Hinoka stepped closer, trying to figure out what was wrong with the younger princess. Her eyes widened as her mouth fell open slightly. “Gods, what happened to your arm!?” Nerr glanced down. The sleeve had been saturated to the point where it could hold no more, and the blood had begun running down her silvery armor, filling in the grooves and painting her arm an ugly shade of red.

 

“...it's nothing.” She said tersely, turning to follow Chief Fuuga. She managed to make it three steps before the world pitched sideways and she hit the ground hard, swearing as loudly as she had strength for as the impact jarred her injured arm. Someone was kneeling beside her, pulling her back into a seated position, probably Jakob... but those hands were not wearing gauntlets, and they were too small. Nerr blinked and the world flashed, but as it came back into focus- not a strong focus, mind you- she could just make out relatively white clothes and long, lazuline hair. Azura's face looked almost... concerned, as she stared down at the Nohrian girl. What; was she worried that if Nerr died in her arms, she might be blamed- guilt by association? She wanted to chuckle, but she was too tired. She didn't even remember closing her eyes...

000

 

Nerr awoke to find herself laying in a cool, mostly dark room, a thin sheet pulled over her. She was so tired, and her head was throbbing in time to her pulse. Her left arm was wrapped in a bandage, despite the fact that she could tell by the way the flesh itched and burned that it had already been healed. As much as she wished she could close her eyes and go back to sleep, she knew that was not an option. In truth, she did not trust herself to the mercy of Hoshidans. The last time she'd been injured in battle and woken up in a strange, Hoshidan location, her world had come crashing down around her. She did not want to know what else was left to be destroyed in another waking nightmare. With more effort than it should have taken, the Nohrian princess sat up, the sheet falling to her chest and the first realization that she was not wearing her armor hitting. She wasn't even wearing her blouse, only the plain black brassiere she wore during training. In the dim light of the room, she could just make out the scar running along her ribs, frowning as she ran a finger over the jagged, puckered seam. It felt terrible- there was no pain, but a sensation that was so unpleasant, she could not suppress her shudder. Why had _that_ left a scar, but nothing else?

 

She shook her head to clear it. That was not important- what _was_ important was finding her clothes, armor, and companions. As she scanned the room, she noticed a folded white robe. Getting to her feet, she walked over and unfolded the smooth cloth. It was short, probably only reaching her hips, but that was enough. She put it on as she would've worn a dressing robe, tying the thin sash laying beside it tightly under her bosom. Even secure, it felt so loose, and she felt horribly under dressed, as if she had just stepped out of the tub. How did Hoshidans walk around in clothes like this? But she could put aside her discomfort. With her mind still groggy, it took a bit of work to find the door, but she finally managed to locate the exit and slide the thin screen open. Stepping out into a hall, she nearly tripped over Jakob, who was kneeling beside the door.

 

“Jakob?”

“Oh! Lady Nerr!” He righted himself at once, worry, fear and relief all mingling together in his face. “I am so sorry; I should have realized you woke up, though honestly, I wasn't expecting you up for several more hours at least; you lost a great deal of blood, milady- I was scared to death.”

“You know I'm made of sterner stuff than that, Jakob. But where is my armor? And my clothes?” A deep flush colored the butler's face, and he averted his gaze.

“Forgive me, milady, but I had to, ahem... undress you to see to your wounds... Princess Sakura, and even one of Princess Hinoka's retainers, offered to do it, but I refused. I am your retainer; taking care of you is my duty and mine alone.” His pride and dedication felt like a balm on her soul.

 

“And I am forever grateful for that fact, Jakob. But you needn't apologize for it; you were the one who used to wash my back and hair before Flora came to the citadel, remember?” Though she meant for her words to be placating, the silver haired steward flushed even darker.

“...we were children then, milady...”

“So? Nothing's changed.” Regardless of all the things she had heard about “impropriety” over the years, Nerr never felt there was anything wrong with her servants seeing her in a state of undress. They were like siblings, and she used to bathe with her siblings. Jakob cleared his throat loudly, looking back to face her, though she could see his indigo eyes were directed somewhere to the right of her ear.

 

“Yes, well... regardless, your blouse has been washed and mended- by yours truly- and your armor is being repaired by Kazeho's smiths. Honestly, I don't know how much more wear and tear it can take, milady- the armor _and_ your clothes.” The princess frowned slightly at his words; she knew they were true. She had a few other articles of clothing, but more armor would be hell to find, and her flimsy training armor was not meant to withstand so many killing blows. Still, it was her duty to appear confident, so as to inspire confidence in her servants.

“There's still use in them yet. We'll cross that bridge when we get there, Jakob. Now tell me, do you know where Chief Fuuga is?” Jakob nodded, his features relaxing slightly now that some of his worries had (for the moment) been laid to rest.

“Of course. He is entertaining your Hoshidan siblings and the others whilst they wait for you to recover.”

“Well, I'd best not keep them waiting much longer.”

 

Jakob led her to a large, open sitting room where the rest of the of Nerr's traveling companions were seated. Silas got to his his feet at once, rushing over to inquire as to her condition. Sakura had approached as well, though she was more reserved in her relief, and slightly worried still that her sister was up and about so quickly. Chief Fuuga laughed, his deep, booming voice echoing through the room. Heroes could not be kept down- that was the one thing all stories and legends had in common, and those who wielded sacred weapons were heroes. Nerr frowned slightly at his words, only just now taking in the faint pink lines left of the wounds caused by her “scared” weapon. The Hoshidan strategist, Yukimura, had said something akin to that as well.

 

“...what do you know of my blade, Chief Fuuga?” While the older man still smiled, a shadow seemed to fall over him, darkening his eyes with... anger? Sorrow? It was impossible to tell.

“Your father and I were good friends, Nerrida-san. You probably don't remember, but he brought you to Kazeho once when you were a child; Sumeragi always did love showing off his children... As the previous owner of the blessed Raijinto, he knew much about the scared weapons, and shared his knowledge with me. I had never seen the Yatogami outside of pictures before, and I am certain he did not either- I had almost thought it a complete fantasy.”

“Yeah, it was stuck inside a statue.”

 

“I-it _flew_ at Nerrida nee-sama... it p-pulled itself from the s-stone and _flew_ into her hand. I-it chose her!” Sakura piped up, smiling with shining eyes as though she were recalling something awe inspiring. Fuuga nodded gravely.

“Yes. The legends all state that the weapon chooses it's wielder, not the other way around. They may be inherited, but it is said that they will not obey a master that is not worthy to hold them.” His sharp, hazel eyes fixated on Nerr. “That was why it was necessary for me to test you.” The Nohrian girl frowned deeply at his words.

“Test me? By trying to kill me? And how, pray tell, do you judge if I pass? If I had killed you, would I have proven myself 'The Chosen One'? If I'd died, would I have been too weak to be a 'hero'- what's your criteria for being 'worthy'? Also, who the hell gave _you_ the authority to do such a thing?”

“Nerrida, don't be so disrespectful!” Hinoka hissed at her, and she scowled at her older sister.

 

“I show respect to people who earn it.” The chieftain chuckled slightly at her words, even as the oldest princess shook her head in exasperation.

“Do not fret, Hinoka-san. I know your sister was raised in Nohr; their culture and values are far different than ours.” He looked back to Nerr. “Yours is a commendable way to approach the world, for many in respectable positions have done nothing to earn the respect they feel is due. While you were recovering, your sisters and companions explained what happened in the Eternal Stairway, that this tragic mistake was due to one of King Garon's men. I knew Hoshidan royals would never attack my people unprovoked; I was well aware _something_ was amiss. And even though hiding the evidence of one's actions is an inherently guilty response, I too understand that you were attempting to spare your comrades an inevitable conflict.” The Nohrian girl's brows furrowed.

 

“So even though you _knew_ we weren't random murderers, you put us through our paces for no gods damned reason?” Though her arm was healed, the anger of that realization sparked a phantom pain. “A pox on you! A pox on _you,_ a pox on your _family_ , a pox on your whole damn village!” Fuuga's eyes narrowed.

“As I already told you, I had us battle so that I may test you. A person's character defines the way they fight. I have battled a great deal of Nohrian soldiers; I have clashed blades with cowards who can only prey on those weaker than themselves, and warriors who's bravery rivals that of any Hoshidan. I feared that you may be the former, but the way you carry yourself in battle proves that you are the latter. Nerrida-san, the blade you posses has the power to link the Seal of Flames. In the wrong hands, it could unleash enough power to end the world. That is why I wanted to see for myself if you were indeed the right person to wield it.”

 

Well, he certainly knew how to make a grand speech; Hinoka, Azura and Sakura were hanging onto his every word. Fortunately, Nerr had been on the receiving end of enough speeches-slash-lectures from both Xander and Gunther to learn to skim them for important facts and drown out the rest. And aside from this “Seal of Flames”, nothing the Wind tribalist said struck her as noteworthy.

 

“And tell me, Chief Fuuga- what would you have done had you decided I was not _not_ worthy of the _supreeeeeme honor_ of owning an old sword? The Yato chose _me_ , not the other way around- the power to destroy the world is already _in_ my hands. If I wanted to kill you badly enough, if I _wanted_ to end the world, do you _really_ think you'd be able to stop me?” A chorus of gasps echoed through the room.

“Nerr, stop it! What are you saying?” Azura looked the most distressed of everyone assembled; the other expressions seemed mostly focused on disbelief and anger.

“I'm saying spare me this wyvern shit about 'chosen ones' and all these other fairy tales you Hoshidans put such stock in. I didn't buy it when Yukimura said it, and I'm not buying it now. A sword is a sword, plain and simple- it's not weapon of mass destruction.” The chieftain frowned at her, but it was more thoughtful than upset.

 

“...are all Nohrians so nihilistic, Nerrida-san? Or is this just a trait unique to you? For I find it difficult to believe the bright eyed little girl I met once long ago so easily had the hope snuffed out of her.” Oh, there were a thousand things Nerr could say in response to that. She could remind him that Nohr did not breed hope as easy as the paradise of Hoshido, that it had been over a decade since he had apparently seen her... Instead, she opted to waste as little breath as possible on his rhetoric.

“Do I have to fight to earn the right to speak of that as well? Everything has been explained to you; I'm done here. Jakob, Silas- we're leaving.” She motioned for her retainer and friend to join her, leaving the room and consciously ignoring everyone's stares. Her keen ears could hear Hinoka explaining to the chieftain that they _all_ needed to be going to look for their wayward brothers, but she did not care about that. Nerr felt as if she had been tossed into some topsy-turvy world where everything existed simple to frustrate her. The nerve of that Fuuga, claiming he was “testing her”. Her left arm felt as if it had fallen asleep, the sharp sensation of pins and needles pricking her running from her bicep to her fingers.

000

 

Reppu was not a large castle- roughly the size of the Northern Citadel- but it was sprawling and many doors led to open balconies where the fierce winds would surely push anyone off and to the rocks below. By the time Nerr and her companions had found the entrance, the Hoshidans had managed to catch up with her, not just her sisters and theirs, but Fuuga as well. A young boy, perhaps Sakura's age, trailed behind them.

 

“Nerrida-san. Please wait a moment.” As eager as she was to leave, he was speaking respectfully to her, so she could at least repay him in kind.

“Yes, Chief Fuuga? What is it?”

“As you were leaving, the thought occurred to to me that we might be able to make a mutually beneficial agreement.” For some reason, his words, benign by all counts, set off warning bells in her mind. Perhaps it was simply the years of hearing nothing but horrid things about Hoshidans, but she did not easily buy into the notion that they would do something to _help_ her. But she kept that train of thought in her mind.

“Oh? And what might this agreement be?”

 

“Hinoka-san explained that you are looking for your brothers, and that Nohrian soldiers may be lurking about. While capable fighters, your retinue is small, and in need of strong men and women. We have a very skilled diviner who could use some real-world experience. His name is Hayato, and he would like to offer his services to your cause.”

“...alright. Where is this Hayato?”

“You're looking at him.” A young boy's voice called out to her, and Nerr looked around for a moment to find the source. She blinked hard when she realized the child standing beside the chieftain. was speaking to her, his hands on his hips, a haughty smirk on his face. “Good day.”

 

“...uh...” Hayato's grin slowly slipped into a frown.

“Is there a problem?” The Nohrian girl took in his appearance, from his shaggy, wine-colored hair, to his short pants that exposed thin legs and knobby knees. He wasn't even as tall as Sakura. A dry, humorless laugh escaped her throat before she could stop it.

“This is a joke, yes? Seriously, Chief Fuuga; where is this skilled diviner you speak of?” Fuuga was not nearly as amused as she was.

“ _This_ is Hayato. He is my son.” As if that was supposed to impress her?

 

“He is a child! I'm already babysitting _one_ child; I don't have the mental fortitude to deal with another.”

“Please, Nerrida-san; don't judge him by his youthful appearance. Hayato has already masted a number of unique skills that make him invaluable.” The boy beamed as his father extolled his skills, puffing out his chest. The gesture made him look even younger.

“I don't mean to sound conceited, but...” He began in the most conceited tone a person could muster. “You'd be lucky to have me on your team. I personally write the spells that bless our harvest ever year, and they've never failed; I'm just that amazing.” Nerr stared at him blankly.

 

“...well, I don't mean to sound ungrateful, _but..._ I would literally rather have my face chewed off by wild dogs than listen to you speak a moment longer.” She watched him deflate with a niggling sense of guilt, the way his lower lip trembled making her feel worse than unceremoniously throwing the dead into a hole... She shook her head a bit- she was being ridiculous, there was nothing for her to feel guilty about. Children did not belong on the battlefield! Even King Garon, monster that he was, would not allow Elise to learn the same combat training the rest of them had to endure. She turned back to the chieftain, who was silently appraising her. “Chief Fuuga, surely you care about your son too much to thrust him into harm's way. Children should be locked away safely during times like this; this is no vacation we're setting upon.”

 

“...yes. I understand what you are saying better than most... but I also know that one can only protect children for so long by locking them away. Hayato has not had much opportunity to leave the village, and there is no guarantee that the war will not reach us here. If he must one day face it, I would feel better knowing he at least had a chance to see the world as it is before the horrors of war ravage it.” There was something about his words that struck a chord with her. Hadn't she too always wanted to see the world, even if it meant being thrust headfirst into the war to do so? Hadn't that been why she trained so hard in the first place? She could have decided it was too dangerous, too scary. Garon kept her locked away to keep her safe, after all (from the Hoshidans who were trying to bring her back, but still). If she decided the thought of being a soldier was not worth it, Xander would not have made her train... She brought this on herself because it _had_ seemed worth it. Nerr sighed deeply.

 

“I see. In truth, I can relate to that...” She turned to the boy, who looked up at her warily. “Well, I hope you're ready to go kill some people.” Fuuga laughed, clapping the boy on the back so hard he nearly toppled over.

“He is strong, and will do as you believe he should. I'm leaving my boy in your care.” Hayato flushed bright red, squirming away from his father with an annoyed grumbled.

“Fuuga-sama! Must I remind you again that I am no longer a child?” He whined in a very childish voice.

“You're right, you're right...” The older man conceded, though not without a hint of sadness. “I must admit that I still feel a bit protective of you at times. Even when you're a fine man, I'll always see you as the little boy who used to scrape his knees trying to keep up with me...”

 

“ _Daaaad!_ I-I mean.... _chiiieeeeefff!!_ ” He looked back at Nerr, his face luminescent. “He-- He's not really my father; he just looked after me since I was a child...” The defensive way he muttered that set the princess's teeth on edge. Why was he making that distinction- Fuuga clearly saw the arrogant chit as his own child; did that _embarrass_ the boy?

“...so what you're saying is, he's your father?” Was this how all Hoshidans thought; that because you did not share blood with a person, they were not your family? She shook her head, all ready exasperated with this boy- hopefully, Ryouma and Takumi would be in Izumo and he would be their problem then. “I hope you find the world worth it, Hayato.” He smiled up at her, running from his father's side to the group of Sakura and her retainers, every inch the excitable child he demanded not to be treated like. Fuuga was watching the scene unfold with a loving warmth in his eyes.

 

“Chief Fuuga. Why are you asking _me_ about him joining? Surely you should have run that past Hinoka.” After all, it seemed seniority ruled in the Hoshidan royal family; it had been the only reason anyone deigned to follow her in the first place. Yellow eyes turned hard.

“...some are meant to lead, and others are meant to follow. In Hoshido, we usually hold that people are born into what roles they must play; in Nohr, I know that is often decided by ability. Our system has served us well enough because those born to lead only needed to worry about leading themselves to greater riches in most cases, but now... the winds of change are blowing, Nerrida. Western winds; Nohrian winds... Regardless of the position your birth placed you into, you are strong enough to weather that storm; that is why the sacred Yatogami chose you. Always remember that.” Most of what the older man had said went completely over her head, but what Nerr took away from his speech was that he did not seem too fond of Hoshido's social hierarchy, and more importantly, he trusted that she was strong enough to lead. Even though the opinions of Hoshidans should not have mattered to her, she could not help but feel bolstered by his encouragement. Smiling ever so slightly, she offered her hand. The chieftain stared at it for a moment, realization dawning on him soon enough. His hand completely enveloped hers, but her grip was strong.

 

“There are trying times ahead, Chief Fuuga, but I pray you and yours are spared the worst of it.”

“A prayer I will say in kind for you.”

000

 

A/N- How does kicking someone's ass make you innocent? I know it's a tried and true trope in games with fighting that someone's fighting style is a reflection of their character, but doesn't that mean that the strongest person is the rightest person? Which would mean Sumeragi should never have been ruler of Hoshido (seriously, how evil do you have to be to be that weak in a game where people barely notice being set on fire half the time? A bunch of nobody archers brought you down? What are you, a child molesting puppy eater?) and Garon is Fateslandia's benevolent, all-loving _GOD_. And that whole “chosen to wield the Yato” thing, and it having the power to destroy the world... maybe it should've done a background check on the person it chose to wield it...

Also, since Hinoka is the oldest one in the group that doesn't have a penis, why isn't _she_ in charge? And Saizou- am I the only one who notices how he kind of goes out of his way to be disrespectful to the avatar? With everyone else it's “lord” this and “lady” that- even Azura!


	4. Curiouser and Curiouser

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Ch.4- “Curiouser and Curiouser”

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Izumo was much farther from the mainland than Nerr had originally anticipated. Hinoka and Tsubaki on their pegasi, and Silas as a cavalier, could cover ground quickly, but that was no help to the rest of the ragtag group who were forced to march on foot. The sky knights, as they were called, would often allow one of the others in the saddle, perhaps seeing the toll days of endless walking was taking on the people. Silas often offered to let her ride Plavo, his destrier (more often than not at Jakob's insistence, it seemed) but she politely declined. Princess though she was, Nerr was no delicate flower. Granted, she was not used to traversing the tough grass and hard packed dirt filled with sharp rocks that made up Hoshido's ground, but she was strong. After all, what was a brisk walk in such mild weather to someone who, only two months ago, had spent a week running laps in cold rain and mud, deprived of sleep and food? Silas had laughed when she brought up endurance training to him, though in a sympathetic manner. He had only just completed his own as well. Even though the mere thought of the grueling training made his stomach clench, he admitted that it _did_ certainly put things in perspective.

 

“These Hoshidans don't know just how good they have it.” He told her one night when they had made camp. Chief Fuuga had given them some provisions to hopefully last until they made it to Izumo, and everyone save the ninja brothers and Sakura was griping about the paltry, tasteless rations. Nerr did not care for the strange, off-white blocks that were apparently made of fermented beans, but her body craved nourishment and besides, she had lived on meaner meals. “They have everything a person could need laid out at their feet, and it's not good enough.”

 

“They're spoiled.” Nerr said quietly. “What can you expect; their empress put a magic bubble over the country so they wouldn't have to share their toys.” There were times when she wished her mother were still alive. Not just so the niggling guilt still brooding in the back of her mind could be set at ease, but so she could question the woman. Why, when she knew Garon could still send armies of mindless killing machines to torment them, would she even bother with such a thing? Surely, a spell that engulfed the entire empire was a terrible drain on one's magic, and for the most part, it really didn't seem to make much difference. The young knight shook his head is disgust.

 

“I don't understand how these people can live. I mean, I guess I _should;_ if it weren't for you, I'd probably be just like them, a bourgeois do-nothing getting fat while the people in the lower classes starve to death...” His words sent a chill down her spine as she recalled something Xander had told her a few months ago. She hadn't really paid attention then- she had been too excited for her upcoming birthday and it's implications.

“Silas... how are things back in Nohr?” The boy laughed slightly.

“It's only been about a month, Nerr; they're... probably exactly the same as you left them.”

 

“That's not what I mean.” She said, her voice more snappish than she intended. She looked down at the grass. It was still a novel sight, seeing this living green carpet cover the dirt and stone. “...you know I wasn't exactly kept up to date with daily life for the people, what with being cooped up in the mountains. Xander mentioned that the wheat crop failed this summer...” Silas's green eyes darkened slightly, and he looked towards the west. Though they could not see the cliff that led to the border, they both knew it was there.

 

“Yeah. That happened. The price of bread's been sky rocketing. There were a couple of riots in Windmire- I actually got sent to help break one of them up. ...it's hard to swing a sword at a mother with a loaf of bread in one hand and a baby in the other...” He plucked a handful of grass, slowly opening his hand and letting it fall back to the earth. “Even though I became a knight hoping to see you again, I have to admit; when King Garon spoke to us knights about why we had to go to war with Hoshido, I was ready to put my life on the line to win this war.” Nerr blinked hard.

“Why? What did he say?” Her friend gave her an odd look.

“What; he didn't give you the same speech?”

“I've only seen my father four times in the past nine years.” She spat bitterly. Silas realized it was best to drop the subject, and leaned back on his hands.

 

“Well, he was pretty much talking about exactly what we're talking about right now; how Hoshidans are greedy and would gladly let us die as long as it means more resources for them. None of the people in my platoon would be happy to hear about how he set you up, but... they'd probably argue that the ends justify the means. When Hoshido's conquered, we'll have more farmland- _actual_ farmland, not that barren scrub we make do with- and our people won't have to suffer any more.” Nerr drew her knees to her chest, wrapping her arms around them. She felt even worse now than she had before. How could a man with such noble goals go about accomplishing them in such repugnant ways? A slight breeze blew, and she shivered slightly.

“...winter is just around the bend. I hope Xander at least had the decency to get Flora and Felicia out of the citadel; I don't want them to get snowed in by themselves...” Maybe if she were lucky, she could sneak back to Nohr before the blizzards began.

 

As the night grew later and everyone had fallen asleep, Nerr found herself restless. Too many thoughts circled her mind, such an overwhelming amount that they seemed to press against her skull, an unbearable pressure that made her vision waver and ears ring. Getting to her feet, she stumbled a bit away from the makeshift camp. She'd never had headaches like this back in Nohr. But then again, she'd never been so tired yet unable to sleep in Nohr either, so maybe the two were related. An indescribable shiver ran down her spine, one that made her stomach turn over uncomfortably. It was the same, awful feeling she used to get when she thought about whatever horrible political marriage King Garon was going to arrange for her, a feeling of existential dread. Pausing, the princess held her breath and closed her eyes, focusing every part of herself in her ears. She could hear insects in the distance, the faint sounds of people breathing... only one breath was not so faint. She reached into her breastplate and pulled out her dragonstone, whirling around and swinging her fist in the direction of Saizou, who stood nearly concealed by the shadows cast by a group of tress. To someone with less keen eyes than her, he would've gone completely unnoticed. He managed to grab her hand, fingers still clenched tightly around the cerulean stone, a hair's breadth before her knuckles collided with his cheekbone.

 

“Saizou. Why are you lurking in the shadows like a creep? Or did I just interrupt you using the latrine?” His deep blue eye narrowed.

“It took you long enough to notice. If this were a battlefield, you'd be dead by now.”

“No, if this were a battlefield, _you'd_ be in my stomach by now. I know you've seen what a wyvern is capable of; do no test a dragon.” A even darker look made the sharp planes of his face even more forbidding as he remembered what had happened to his comrade at the Infinite Chasm. Camilla's mount only had an animal intelligence; the thought of that ferocious killing power in the hands of a human was not at all pleasant. She decided to change the subject, for both their benefit, drawing her hand away and lowering it to her side, though not relinquishing her grip on her stone. “Why are you spying on me, Saizou? Is this some strange hobby of yours? Am I going to wake up one morning and find you kneeling over me, breathing hard?”

 

“Don't flatter yourself.” He spat viciously. “I'd find a literal dog more attractive than _you._ You may be a princess of Hoshido by blood, but that doesn't make you any less of a Nohrian mongrel. It wasn't until recently you lived as _their_ royalty, and now, on the dawn of our country laying in shambles, we are drawn into your orbit. You may have my brother convinced that you are some kind of saint, but you'll find I'm not so stupid. The moment you try _anything_ , I'll be the first to know... and the first to deal with it.” Well, that wasn't anything she didn't already know; Saizou had made it clear that he didn't trust her, but spying on her? Really, how long had this been going on? And there was a more pressing question...

 

“...did Ryouma put you up to this?” It wasn't unlikely. During her first week in the castle, after she had tried to escape no less than five times in three days, she had found armed guards in the hall where her room was. They hadn't been there before, and Mikoto had been adamant that she at least not be _treated_ like the prisoner she was, so that only left the high prince. Perhaps he thought she would still try to leave, and had placed one last guard to try and deter her. Well, if nothing else, he knew her pretty well. The shinobi shook his head, a lock of crimson hair falling into his face.

“This has nothing to do with Ryouma-sama; I am doing it of my own initiative.” Even if her blood brother _had_ ordered him to keep an eye on her, Nerr doubted Saizou would tell her. After all, that would make Ryouma look like some kind of paranoid dastard (just like he was). But she did not care either way.

 

As the ninja brushed the errant strands away, she could not help but take note of the scar on his eye. It was a deep cut that ran from the center of his forehead to his right cheek. It was not ragged, so the blade that made it must have been very sharp, but she could see how it tugged at his eyelid, deforming it slightly. As much as she disliked this man, the urge to ask how that had happened was great, but she shoved that thought deep down in her stomach, stomping on it it until it couldn't bother her anymore. You _don't_ ask about scars- that was the one lesson she had never needed to be taught, because she intrinsically _knew_ it. She never asked Gunther about _his_ , no matter how much the question burned her mind. She had to physically shake her head to bring her head back to the real world. Saizou was still glaring at her, she could just imagine the ugly scowl his lips were twisted into under his stupid mask, and so she returned his hateful stare with interest.

 

“...is that supposed to scare me? Hurt my feelings, knowing you don't trust me? I've never cared less about anything in my life, Hoshidan. Tell me truly; what kind of sick pleasure do you get out of watching me? I should have you know that this show is not free.”

“That's none of your concern. All you need to know is that I _am_ watching you. _Always._ ”

“Even when--”

“ _Especially_ then.” Perhaps a proper lady, the kind who attended court and wore fine gowns and sparkling jewelry, would have been more upset at the prospect of a strange man watching her, even in private, intimate situations, but for some reason, it just struck Nerr as funny. In the morning, she should tell Hinoka and Sakura that this seething man was watching her pee and see if they thought it was as funny as she did. She even managed to spare a breathy chuckle as she turned to head back to camp.

 

“Well, enjoy yourself, you deviant.”

000

 

Nearly two solid weeks of marching finally led them to the border of Izumo. While Nerr had understood that Shirasagi looked lovely in a clinical way, Izumo was the first place in Hoshido that she could say was actually beautiful. As she and her traveling party approached the red wooden arch that marked it's boundary, it seemed that the air itself grew purer, nourishing her in such a way that with every breath, she felt better than she had in ages. Even the sharp stabbing in her temples seemed to be easing off. And it was not just her; everyone seemed more at peace, tot he point that she could see Jakob relax his board stiff posture and stand like a human, rather than a statue. Azura smiled, for the first time in days as far as Nerr had known.

 

“We're finally here...”

“I had no idea how beautiful this place was. It's like an earthly paradise.” She could not stop the words once they were on her tongue, but oddly, she did not even regret saying them. Clearly, the other princess agreed with her, nodding slightly.

“Yes. They call this place 'the kingdom of the Gods' for a reason.”

“Izumo is it's own sovereign nation in Hoshido.” Hinoka explained, approaching her younger sisters. “It's the one prefecture in Hoshido that every other region respects as a sanctuary; anyone from anywhere can come here seeking amnesty, and it will be granted.”

 

“H-hopefully, Ryouma nii-sama and T-Takumi nii-sama made it here alright...” Sakura whispered. Azura smiled softly at her.

“Well, that's what we're going to find out. Oh! Someone's already come to meet us.” A man in long robes was indeed approaching the gates, a string of beads around his neck.

“Who's there?” He asked, and for some reason, all three Hoshidan princesses turned to Nerr. At any other time, in any other place, she have gotten on them for expecting her to do the talking, but she felt so relaxed that it didn't even bother her. In fact, a tiny part of her was a bit proud that they trusted her to speak for them. Back home in Nohr, she'd been diligently schooled in the art of speaking to leaders and negotiation, but she had never really had a chance to put any of her skills to use. Well, there was a first time for everything.

 

“Ho there! The royal family of Hoshido. We seek information on some people who may have passed through here, or hopefully, are _still_ here.” Azura stepped forward as well, bowing slightly.

“If it would not be too much trouble, may we please speak with Izana-sama?” The man's eyes lit up as he spotted the songstress.

“Ah, Azura-sama! Of course! Ah, these must be your sisters, then. Yes, of course- Izana-dono always welcomes the presence of the royal family. This way, please; I will lead you to the castle, and he will be with you shortly.”

“Thank you very much.” The man began walking back into the city, Azura following him without a second thought. Nerr glanced back at the others, Silas giving a hapless shrug before following suit as well. The sisters ended up walking together in the front of the group, and she looked towards Hinoka.

 

“Are all of you such good friends with this 'Izana' fellow?” The oldest of them shook her head.

“No. That's just Azura... and Ryouma.” Sensing the Nohrian girl's confusion, Azura explained in a quiet voice.

“When I had first been brought to Hoshido, Mikoto-sama came to Izumo on official business. She brought Ryouma with her because he was still learning his responsibilities as the heir to the throne, and I assume she brought me because Izumo is a much more soothing place than Shirasagi.”

“Takumi and Sakura were too young to travel very far back then.” Hinoka elaborated. “And I... well, I wasn't really in the mood for things like civilized conversation. I spent all my time training back then.”

“I-I've always wanted to visit Izumo.” Sakura piped up. “It's just as b-beautiful as I'd always i-imagined. Um, Azura nee-sama? W-what's Izana-sama like?” The songstress smiled slightly.

 

“Well, I only met him once, and I was still a child, so perhaps my memory affects my judgment, but... I think he's wonderful. He is very kind and generous, and... well... you'll see.” She fell silent on that cryptic note, and with the thought of cryptic things in her mind, Nerr turned back to their guide.

“Excuse me? Sir?” He looked back over his shoulder at her to let her know she had his attention. “I believe there was a battle that took place near your borders a few weeks ago. Can you tell us anything about it?” As she thought about those mages Saizou claimed had been there as a distraction, the Nohrian princess realized it would be best to make sure there were no Faceless or any other unpleasant surprises lingering around. The Izumite frowned slightly.

“A battle around here? ...nnnoo... I don't think so...” She frowned as well.

“Really? _Nothing?_ ” The man faced front once more.

 

“Well, I suppose it's possible there may have been some small skirmish I haven't heard about; brigands often pillage nearby villages, even more so the more remote they are, but I sincerely doubt there was anything that could be classified as a 'battle'. Izumo has been a sanctuary since humans first settled here; no one would dare violate the sacred nature of our hospitality.” Nerr slowed slightly, and Azura took smaller steps as well so she too could fall a bit behind.

 

“Nerr?” She asked in a quiet voice. “What is it?”

“Saizou and Orochi said Ryouma and Takumi disappeared on the way here; there's no way two princes go down without a fight and it's not noticed.” It seemed the suspicious nature of that claim was just beginning to dawn on the songstress.

“You're right... this is beginning to feel a little strange. Perhaps we should proceed with caution.”

“Let this be a life lesson to you Azura; _always_ proceed with caution. There's no magic barrier to keep you safe anymore, and I swear to the gods, people are waiting to screw us over around every bend.”

000

 

The Izumite castle was larger and even more grand than that of the Wind Tribe's. Nerr could not help but look around, somewhat in awe. It was surely not as elaborate as the royal family's home, but a prison, no matter how grand, would never be anything but a prison. Art hung on the walls, delicate watercolors depicting scenic views, as well as scrolls with flowing calligraphy in letters she couldn't make sense of. A soft light filled the room, bathing everything in a gentle glow. It was beautiful in it's austerity. One strange thing the Nohrian girl noticed was that Hinoka and Sakura both removed their shoes before crossing the rooms threshold. Given that Azura went barefoot as she did, it wasn't an issue for the singer, but it struck her as odd nonetheless. Most people could not stand feeling any kind of flooring on their bare feet, at least, the people she knew. A part of her wanted to ask what that was about, but on the other hand, she didn't want to make it sound like she was interested in Hoshidan culture. Instead, she voiced another question that had been lingering near the back of her mind.

 

“Do you think we'll have to wait long to see him?” Sakura shook her head slightly, the ribbon in her hair swaying gently.

“I d-doubt it. M-mother always said a good host does not m-make their guests wait; t-this is probably just a bit of... formal grandstanding.” Azura nodded in agreement.

“I wouldn't be surprised if the daimyo was standing in the next room, just waiting for the perfect time to make his entrance.”

“Daimyo?” The question was out of her mouth before she could stop herself, and Hinoka frowned ever so slightly.

“The leader of the prefecture. Every province in Hoshido has someone that rules over the territory, and they in turn are ruled by the emperor.”

 

“Oh, so like a duke, or duchess.”

“ 'Dook'?” Sakura repeated the word, giggling slightly. “Nohrians have funny words.”

“Right, because 'die-mee-oh' invokes such a sense of authority?” Despite the clear mockery aimed at her people, Nerr did not feel insulted, and her voice reflected that. Had Hinoka said anything, she was sure it would've been prefaced with something about 'Nohrian scum', but Sakura seemed too earnest to think in prejudiced terms. Soft footfalls, almost inaudible, drew her attention away from her sisters, and the Hoshidan girls followed her gaze as it landed on a man in white robes with baggy black trousers. Long, straight silvery hair fell past his shoulders, and his skin was so pale it seemed almost translucent. Nerr's first instinct would have been to assume it was a woman, but she could see the broad shoulders and muscular chest only partially concealed by his robes. He seemed to glide along the floor rather than walk as mortal might, his eyes closed and face so peaceful, it seemed more likely that he was asleep rather than awake.

 

“He looks so...” Strange? Contradictory? Feminine? Not at all like she was expecting? “...serene.”

“You're right about his looks, that's for sure. I've only ever seen Azama look _that_ calm, and I never trust what's going on in _his_ mind...” Sakura shied away slightly, hiding behind her eldest sister.

“T-t-this is actually m-making me n-n-nervous...” The daimyo stopped before the royals, looking more like a statue depicting some ancient god than a flesh and blood man.

 

“Welcome.” Even his voice radiated calm. It raised goosebumps all along Nerr's arms, but she would not allow herself to be intimidated. No one was more frightening to face than King Garon, she reminded herself, and she had looked him square in the eye. Feeling a bit more confident, she stepped forward.

“Your lordship? Erm, Daimyo Izana? May I call you 'Lord'?” She wasn't sure how a Hoshidan would take to being addressed with Nohrian title, but his dark eyes slowly opened. Without warning, the daimyo threw his head back and laughed heartily. Everyone gathered- sans Azura- recoiled in shock.

 

“Oh please, you can call me anything you like! I'm partial to just plain old 'Izana', but I also answer to 'cutie' and 'hey, baby'.” He winked at her suggestively, and the songstress giggled.

“You haven't changed at all, Izana-sama...” Izana's eyes widened comically.

“Doth mine ears deceive me, or are those dulcet tones I hear the lyrical voice of our sweet princess Azura? Oh, come over here, girl! Wherefore did you stay so long away from me?” He rushed over to embrace the blunette girl tightly. Azura, though clearly not very comfortable with this excessive display of affection, still managed to smile as she pried herself away.

 

“My apologies; things have been... hectic, to say the least.”

“Oh, don't I know it, honey child...” Hinoka tapped Nerr on the shoulder to get her attention, leaning over and whispering into her ear.

“I don't know what I was expecting, but it definitely wasn't this...”

“Is it really safe to have someone like this ruling over such a large territory?”

“Well, we never hear any complaints, so I guess he's doing a good enough job...” Izana only just seemed to take notice of the rest of the princesses, squealing in delight as he clapped his hands together.

 

“Oh, look how beautiful and adorable and just absolutely _lovely_ you all are! Oh, I wish I could just make you into little dolls! But where are my manners; I've been so entranced with darling Azura-sama, I've completely forgotten to introduce myself properly. I am Izana- yes! _The_ Izana! Voted 'Best Hair' in Izumo five years running!” He ran his fingers through the luscious locks, the fine strands of hair shimmering in the light. He was prettier than she was, and a small part of Nerr resented him for it. “Now, why don't I set you lovelies up with some slippers and a warm beverage and we can relax?” Azura cleared her throat slightly.

 

“Izana-sama, before we get to the slippers, we have some important questions for you.”

“More important than Izumite hospitality?”

“I'm afraid so. Are you aware of a recent battle between Nohrian forces and Hoshidan soldiers in the area?” Izana frowned deeply, an expression that seemed out of place on his angelic countenance. Slowly, he shook his head.

“A recent battle...? Hmm.... Nope!” At once, his usual demeanor came back. “Can't say I have! And I would be the first to know, too. You know, what with being the daimyo and all. Haha!”

“I see...” Azura frowned as well, a dark look clouding her golden eyes. This was getting stranger by the moment in Nerr's eyes. It was possible that Saizou and Orochi had perhaps simply gotten the terrain wrong, and Silas _had_ been adamant that there were no more Nohrian troops in Hoshido, but... an odd feeling settled in her gut.

 

“Maybe we're in the wrong place.” She said aloud. “We might want to check elsewhere.”

“Now hold on just a minute, partner! You're in the rightest place of all; Izana's house!” The daimyo rushed in front of her, as if anticipating her intention to leave and blocking her off. He beamed at her, dark eyes taking in her disheveled appearance. “Now that you mention a battle, I _do_ see that you're all roughed up. Gosh, we can't have _that_ , now can we? Not with all the resources I have here. Why, it would be positively criminal to allow the princesses of Hoshido to suffer when Izumo is home to the best physicians and healers in the country.”

 

“I-I have heard that Izumite healer are re-renowned for their tec-techniques.”

“You are absolutely right... Sakura-sama, I want to say? Yes, you look like a Sakura, and Azura-sama has told me all about you. You look a bit frazzled as well. You and... Nerr, was it? Tell you what- I've got something special in mind for the two of you. Deep restorative healing is what I call it. It mends the body _and_ soothes the mind. Whadaya say?” Sakura frowned slightly.

“J-just the two of us?”

“I doubt we're the only ones with significant wounds.” Nerr added simply. Izana smiled at them.

 

“Perhaps not, but you two are undoubtedly the most exhausted. I can see it in those beautiful eyes. People with delicate constitutions are usually the first to crack if pushed too hard, and I couldn't bear knowing you two cracked when I could have helped. The rest of your companions will be treated as well, not to worry. Come now, quickly, quickly! Hot towels don't stay hot forever!” With a hand on each of their backs, the daimyo led both princesses away. Sakura looked back to her other sisters, a pleading look on her face, but Nerr reached out to lay a reassuring hand on her shoulder.

“Let's just play along, Sakura. We don't want to be rude to the daimyo, do we?”

“Uh... I-I suppose you're r-right, nee-sama...”

000

 

For such a large castle, the halls seemed surprisingly desolate. Though Nerr should not have been surprised; not everyone could afford so many servants. After all, including herself, there had only been six residents in the Northern Citadel- vaguely, she remembered more staff, but they all seemed to vanish, both from the fortress and her memory. Not to mention, Izana had said that he was leading them somewhere they could relax, and it would hardly be relaxing if people were bustling about everywhere. The daimyo led both girls into a dark room with wooden panels on the walls, closing the door behind them. Sakura looked around, her eyes wide and unaccustomed to the darkness.

 

“A-are we in the right place? It's r-r-really dark in here...”

“Of course it is; how else are you going to relax. Don't worry, princess Sakura- there's nothing to be afraid of in the dark...” The pale man began approaching the youngest Hoshidan royal, but had barely taken two steps toward her before a pair of strong arms pushed him away, smashing his cheek against the wall hard enough to bruise. Sakura screamed.

“N-Nee-sama, wh-what are you doing?!”

“Yes, princess; what _are_ you doing!? I'm trying to help you- _this_ is how you repay me?!” Scowling, Nerr wrapped her arm around his throat, pressing her forearm into his windpipe until he gagged.

 

“Why don't you drop the act already? I don't know how you're fooling Azura, but it _won't_ work on me.”

“Wh-what are you talking about?!”

“I've lived in Nohr for fifteen damn years; you think I don't know my own people? _Nobody_ in Hoshido calls me 'Nerr', it's always 'Nerrida' which means _you_ didn't know that's apparently my real name. Also,” She threw him to the floor, pulling loose the Yato and leveling it with his throat. “That cheap cologne you're wearing doesn't mask the smell of elder magic.” Nerr had never known it was possible to _smell_ magic until she had been in Hoshido for so long. She recognized it when Ganglari broke, too concentrated to be bearable but definitely what she was used to breathing in Nohr. The moment “Izana” had come close to her, she had smelled it again, fainter, more even and nuanced- similar to the way Leo smelled under the soap he bathed with. Sakura stared at the man laying still on the floor for a moment, before running to hide behind her sister, tucking herself between her armored back and tattered cape.

 

“Wh-wh-who is this if it's not Izana...?”

“I don't know, but I'm going to find out.” She turned her sword and lifted it high- she wouldn't cut him, but it would definitely leave a mark. “Izana” yelped in fear, and the darkness was shattered with a bright flash of light, acrid smoke filling the room. Nerr coughed, trying to wave away the smoke as she fumbled for the door, struggling a bit to throw it open. She gulped down the fresher air of the hall, heart stopping in her chest as she slowly looked up, taking in the sigh of Nohrian soldiers lining the opposite wall, Izana standing in front of them with the most delighted grin on his face. Their helms obscured their faces, but she could only imagine the hate they were staring at her with, traitor that she was. Sakura has just been about to run from the room, but stopped with a squeal of fear as she too spotted the soldiers.

 

“N-nee-sama, we're su-surrounded!”

“I know, Sakura, just stay back.” She pushed the girl back into the room, blocking the doorway with her own body. “I don't know what you're playing at, _Izana_ , but I am neither amused nor impressed.”

“Oh, well maybe _this_ will amuse you.” Ancient runes glowed both at his feet as well as in the air around him as another cloud of smoke enveloped him, this one not as potent. As it faded, the regal daimyo was replaced with a stooping, sallow man in shabby mauve robes, clearly a mage. His long, thin fingers wriggled ceaselessly as the strange man twitched and shook, giggling to himself. He looked up at Nerr with glazed eyes sunk deep into their sockets. “Boom. Blew your mind, didn't I? Eeheeheehee... It's been a while, hasn't it, Lady Nerr? Or do you not remember me?” The Nohrian princess recoiled from the cadaverous mage, her lips twisted in disgust. She had no recollection of ever meeting anyone so disturbing, unless she had simply put it from her mind like everything else unpleasant.

 

“I don't know you, cretin.” For some reason, his shoulders seemed to droop slightly, and he stepped closer to her. She refused to step back- she would _not_ be intimidated by this sad, sorry excuse for a man- but she leaned back as far as she could without falling down.

“I-I'm Zola! One of King Garon's most talented mages!” He realized from her expression that the name wasn't ringing any bells. “I performed at the fete two years ago! Y-you even applauded; I saw you, you were in the front of the crowd!” A note of desperation tinged his voice. Lots of things happened at the fete, and Nerr was not eager to recount any of them since the entire night had been one of the biggest disappointments of her life.

 

“...so... you're a jester?”

“Do I look like a jester?!” He raved, clearly not realizing that with his silly cap, the answer was most definitely 'yes'.

“Am I supposed to be impressed by _whatever_ you are? I don't care if you're the Man in the Moon. Tell me what you've done with the real Izana, and why you're in Hoshido.” Zola stared at her, agape, as if she had been speaking an entirely different language all this time.

“... _what?_ Why would you care about that creep? _I'M_ the one who's finally captured the infamous Princess Traitor! _I'M_ the one who matters!!”

 

“Not to me.” She crossed her arms over her chest as best she could while still gripping the Yato, looking away from the miserable jester and turning her nose up for good measure. Clearly, he was trying to seem important, and she would not give him the satisfaction. Were there not actual soldiers standing there putting Sakura at risk, she might have enjoyed mocking him a bit more just to see how riled up she could get him. He was already pretty upset, breathing deeply in a vain effort to calm himself. He cackled with a manic look in his eyes.

 

“Good luck getting yourself and Princess Sakura out of _this_ , since you think you're so much better than me... Soldiers! Attack!” They all lifted their weapons, but while some were stepping closer, others stayed behind. Nerr did not have time to try and figure out what they were up to; she was too focused on the lance getting closer to her. Hopefully, she would be able to knock it aside and use that opening to knock it's wielder out. There was a loud clang of something heavy hitting plate mail, and all the soldiers turned to see one of their comrades on the ground, the back of their helmet caved in, blood oozing thickly over the back of their neck and onto the floor. The rest of the soldiers who'd stayed back pulled out weapons of a decidedly Hoshidan design, and set upon those engaging the princess. Sakura sucked in a sharp gasp, half shielding her eyes from the grisly scene with Nerr's cloak.

 

“Wh-why are they attacking each other?”

“They're not- _those_ are Hoshidan soldiers.”

“No! Gods no, what are you doing?!” Zola howled as another an archer fell, a deep gash across his midsection. The cut itself did not bleed, the edges cauterized, but as his guts slipped out, blood pooled onto the floor. The cavalier who held a spear wreathed in magenta flames lifted their helm, revealing short, messy red hair and cold red eyes.

“This is some healing treatment you arranged, huh?”

 

“Hinoka!”

“Hinoka nee-sama!” Laughing with relief, the rose-haired girl dashed to her other sister's side. The other “soldiers” took off their helms as well, revealing familiar, Hoshidan faces. Kaze wiped the sweat from his brow with his sleeve, the blood on his hand leaving a crimson streak along his hairline.

“Very impressive, Hinoka-sama. You were right on all counts.”

“Indeed. I never would have assumed things were _this_ wrong.” From around the corner, Azura, Jakob and Silas came, the men dragging another knight along behind them, bound and gagged and extremely bloody. “It's a good thing you trusted your instincts, Hinoka.”

 

“How did you suspect _anything?!”_ Zola shrieked, torn between anger and fear. “My Zola impression was perfect! I even fooled Azura!” Hinoka shook her head, raising her Amaterasu.

“Your supposed daimyo acted like a buffoon- no head of state would behave like that.”

“How _DARE_ you!? My impression was flawless! No matter, no matter...” He breathed sharply, eyes bulging from his skull as he tittered, twitching worse than ever. “The joke's still on you; you fools don't even realize you're surrounded. Move forth, soldiers! Take them out!” He yelled, his voice echoing and bouncing along the halls in such a way that it must have been magically amplified. He locked eyes with Nerr, his deranged smile growing wider. “Not Princess Traitor, though; I'll deal with her myself.”

 

“I can accept those terms.” She lunged at him, swinging her sword and preparing the the resistance of metal slicing through flesh. It never came, the brass edge cutting through naught but air and magically charged smoke before embedding into the wall. Nerr tugged on the blade to pull it free and looked around.

 

More soldiers were approaching, but before she could even think to give orders, the Hoshidans were charging into battle, clearly intent on taking no prisoners. She didn't know who's orders they were following, but this wasn't their fault. Perhaps Zola was their commander, though honestly, she'd never heard of a mage being in charge of a squadron- after all, one finger deep and you'll sever their spines, as Gunther used to joke after Leo left from his visits. But he had ordered them, so maybe times were changing... Whatever it was, she needed to find the nasty little man and get some answers. She did not drive her sword in deep to kill like the people around her, opting to use only the flat of the blade and wielding it more as a club than anything. An opening led to a veranda, and she stepped out, hoping she could somehow go around the castle unnoticed and flank the mage. She paused as she heard talking, two people by the sound of it.

 

“--take so long if you didn't tie them up.”

“I feel bad killing 'em. They're probably just doin' their job, like we are...”

“They're fucking Nohrians, Hinata! You deal with them like-- ...this.” Quick steps, running steps, behind her were all the warning Nerr got to turn around, Yato raised on instinct alone as the curved blade of a naginata came terrifying close to her face. The fresh blood coating the blade dripped off, landing on her nose. “Die, Nohrian scum!” The owner of the blade screeched, swinging it again, intent on taking off her head. The draconic princess would not allow herself to fall to some bloodthirsty Hoshidan, not now. She ducked under the lance, getting close enough that she could see the hideous scowl directed at her.

 

“Hold!” She she had to duck again as the lance came back for a second time, scarping against her armor. “Hold, you crazy bitch! I'm with Hoshido!” The words burned her tongue, and apparently did her no good.

“Your armor says otherwise, anyan whore!”

“Wait! Oboro, hold on!” The mad girl paused in her frantic attacks for a beat, long enough for Nerr to kick her legs out from under her. She stomped hard on the Hoshidan's hand the moment she saw those fingers inching towards her fallen weapon. Her companion, a man with messy brown hair in battered armor, came running up. “Oboro, what are you doin'? You can't just attack anything that _looks_ remotely Nohrian; you're gonna get in trouble!” The girl, Oboro by the sound of it, sneered up at Nerr.

 

“Who are you, claiming to be with Hoshido but dressing like _that?_ ” The pure, unadulterated loathing in her voice set the princess's teeth on edge.

“I'm Princess Nerrida, or so I've been told. Who the fuck are _you_ , peon?”

“Whoa, Nerrida-sama! You don't know who we are?” The boy seemed much less antagonistic, so she retained a measure of civility when addressing him.

“Sorry, all you Hoshidans look the same to me. Should I?”

“Ha! Probably. The name's Hinata. And my comrade you're stepping on is Oboro.”

 

“We're Takumi-sama's retainers.” Oboro said stiffly. Oh, so they weren't just random nobodies. Begrudgingly, Nerr lifted her foot, and the girl got back to her feet, taking great care to brush every speck of dust from her ugly orange robes. She looked at the princess with cold scrutiny in her pale mauve eyes. “So... you're Takumi-sama's sister... You know, maybe if you didn't wear those hideous, Nohrian rags, it wouldn't be so easy to mistake you for one.”

 

“Maybe if your liege kept you on a tighter leash, it would be easier to assume you're a royal retainer and not just some silly, psychotic bitch.” She spat back. Hinata didn't seem to catch the vitriol in her voice (or else, decided it was best to just ignore it).

“We got separated from Takumi-sama on the battlefield, and even lost track of Saizou and Kagerou. We're doing everything we can to track him down, but we're running out of ideas.” So it seemed Saizou wasn't the only one who couldn't keep tabs on his lord.

“Losing your liege? You're pretty shitty retainers, aren't you?”

 

“It wasn't our fault!” Oboro raved, anger darkening her face once more. Demons probably had nightmares about that expression. “It was those fucking Nohrians. They came out of nowhere with their magic and Faceless. And after Ryouma-sama told them to get the fuck out of Hoshido, too, no less! Those gods damned whoresons can't leave well enough alone, then wonder why we don't want anything to do with their savage asses!” It seemed she had gotten herself so worked up, she had completely forgotten what had upset her in the first place. Hinata gave Nerr a sympathetic look, clearly used to people being disturbed by his companion's behavior.

 

“Sorry, she... _really_ hates Nohrians.” _'So much for 'benevolent' and 'peace-loving'... damned savages...'_ “Will you help us find him?” What? Oh, they were talking about Takumi. Sighing slightly, the princess nodded.

“I suppose. I mean, that _is_ why his sisters and I are already in Izumo. If we can find the real Izana, he might have some answers.” Oboro stopped her anti-Nohrian ranting long enough to shoot the other girl a worried look.

“What do you mean, 'real' Izana. Has something happened to the daimyo?”

 

“Possibly. That's why I need to find Zola and get some answers.”

“Zola? Sounds Nohrian. Don't worry; I'm _good_ at getting answers from Nohrians...” With a wicked smirk, the girl grabbed her lance and ran inside. Hinata followed, shouting at her to make sure she was actually attacking _enemies_ this time. Nerr shook her head, half exasperated, half disgusted. Every Hoshidan she met seemed to be more unpleasant than the last. Gods, what she would not give to put this whole terrible ordeal behind her. But alas, she had much to do before she could rest easy.

000

 

Indeed, Nerr had been correct in her assumption that the deck she'd run onto circled the castle, and by following the Nohrian soldiers she came across, knocking them each out before looking for the next one, she found herself in a new area. Dark magic tinged the air, just enough of a whiff that she knew Zola was near by. Perhaps it would have been faster to run _through_ the castle, but... she had heard the screams from outside, the think paper screens doing nothing to mute the sound of soldiers- _her_ soldiers, her people- dying as they were set upon by the Hoshidans she was supposed to embrace. As far from the others as she was, she could still smell the blood lingering in the air, that thick, coppery tang sharp on her tongue. She tried to ignore it, still sniffing out the source of the magic. Pausing, the princess tied the Yato back to her sword belt and pulled out her dragonstone. Feeling the tendons snap as her bones grew longer and larger was probably the most unpleasant part of the transformation, that and the feeling of each bone breaking little by little as they grew.

 

She could even ignore the sensation of her guts slipping into different places, or her skin hardening into leather and thick scales, but the bones and muscles... every growing pain she'd ever had, rolled into one and made a thousand times worse could not compare. The only blessing was that by the time she really began feeling the agony, it was done with, but it still left her a bit winded. Everything looked as if it had been painted with dull silver, but the smells came sharper than she could tolerate. Even though it was far away, every splash of blood, all the piss and shit from corpses who had voided their bowels in death, reached her just as strong as if she were right in the thick of it. Someone giggled, a sound that made the (metaphorical) hair on the back of her neck stand on edge. Picking her way lightly across the floor, Nerr approached the sound, smell of magic growing stronger. The air around her suddenly dropped in temperature, ice crystals forming on her unarmored underside and stabbing into her flesh like shards of glass. For a moment she forgot she no longer had hands, nor could not stand on two legs, and tried to brush the painful frost from her belly, nearly falling down in the process.

 

“I know that's you, princess. Hoshidans don't revere dragons the way Nohrians do.” Giving up on ridding herself of the ice magic, Nerr tentatively looked around the corner she had been about to turn. There was another door, this one slid open to reveal Zola holding a magic tome, smirking at her. “Wyverns are weak to ice magic; one spell, and they go down just as quickly as if you used an arrow.”

 

_“I regret to inform you that I am not a wyvern.”_

“No, you're some kind of manakete. I knew it, I knew it the first time I laid eyes on you, I told Iago, 'look at her ears; don't they look just like the manaketes in the history books?', but he blew me off just like he always does. Well, I'll show him. I'll kill you dead and bring you back to the capital and King Garon will be so proud of me and-- wow, you're big...” Nerr had used his long, rambling rant to squeeze her way into the room. With her long, spindly legs and large wings that she'd unfurled to make herself look (hopefully) even more intimidating, she did in fact take up quite a bit of space.

 

“ _All the better to eat you...”_

“How 'bout _no!?”_ The dark mage fumbled, dropping his tome and pulling another one from his moth-eaten robes. The pages glowed as he flipped it open, channeling his magic through the pages. The draconic princess braced herself for the spell- it at least did not appear to be another Fimbulvtr, so that was a blessing- but as it hit, it felt as if someone were pulling her very life force from her body, blood, breath, everything she needed to live. Her vision swam as she stumbled slightly, splaying her claws out to keep her balance. Zola's madcap tittering felt like someone was driving an ice pick through her temples.

 

“Ha! No wonder the dragons all died. I guess it's time to make sure they're _really_ extinct.” She could tell by the way the air around him charged with magic, enough to make his already wild hair stand on end, that he was about to unleash a powerful spell, but he was severely underestimating her if he thought she didn't know how to deal with mages. After all, the strongest mage in Nohr was her little brother. Before Zola could unleash his spell, she slapped him to the side with the back of her claws, knocking him into the wall. Groaning in pain as he slid down the plaster, the man tried to get back to his feet, but Nerr had other plans, She stepped forward, arching her long neck and grabbing him by the scruff of his cape. His already pallid face turned ashen as he looked up, realizing just how close his head was to the maw of an angry dragon.

 

“Oh gods! Put me down!”

_“_ _I will... when I'm bored with you.”_ And with that cryptic taunt, she began shaking her head back and forth as hard as she could, feeling Zola flop like a ragdoll with every snap. A few times, he hit the wall, the paster knocking loose, a loud crack issuing from somewhere around his hip once. His terrified, miserable cries quickly stopped, as did Nerr's rough treatment. She dropped him in an unceremonious heap, not because she felt guilty, but because she was getting dizzy. Mentally unclenching her fist, she slowly returned back to a normal size, nearly falling down herself as the world spun. She leaned against the door frame to steady herself. Zola remained where he was, whimpering softly.

 

“Check and mate, Zola. Now, tell me where you're keeping Izana.” The dark mage coughed, retching slightly.

“Ugh... urk... n-no...” Crimson eyes widened, and she stomped over to him, taking note of the way he cowered from her approach.

“What the hell do you mean, 'no'? You're beaten to a pulp! Don't make me turn into a dragon again, Zola; I might decide you need less than four limbs...” Even though he was breathing hard and clearly in pain, the strange man laughed weakly, looking up at her. His hat had been knocked off, and she could see blood soaking his dirty blonde hair, dripping down into his face and mixing the the tracks left by tears.

 

“...how naïve you are... what a sheltered life you've lived... As if your threats mean anything to me. I'd rather _die_ than help you. Luckily, I won't have to!” The ground below him glowed with runes, and before Nerr could realize what he was doing, a cloud of smoke filled the room, burning her eyes and lungs. Coughing, she blindly scrambled for him in the area he had been, but she already knew he wasn't there. A loud rumble from outside was followed by pained shrieks, and she ran out of both the room and the castle through the door she'd come in through. Just past the veranda, she saw Zola in the castle garden, thin branches and vines wrapped around his limbs and torso. “Ow! Ow ow owowow!! What's going on? Let me go!”

 

“No.” Nerr looked up at that cold, unaffected voice. An ebony destrier in black barding grazed under a nearby tree, and from it's shadows a young man in full armor stepped into the clearing, appraising the trussed up mage in an almost bored manner. Her heart jumped into her chest, happier than she should have been. In that instant, it was easy to forget everything that was going on, that she was in Hoshido and branded a traitor by her family; her heart of hearts was always happy to see her brothers and sisters, especially when it had been a while since their last visit.

 

“Leo! What are you doing here?” The young prince ignored her, not even deigning to waste a glance on her.

“Ah, Zola... When Xander told me about some errant soldiers chasing after glory, I had an inkling you'd be at the head of the pack. You'll never learn to just be content in your place. No, you've embarrassed our kingdom for the last time.”

“Milord! Please, you don't mean that! I was just attempting to preserve my dignity--”

“Dignity? Ha! What would you know about such a foreign concept as _that?_ No, I've had it up to here with your idiotic little schemes. If they at least did more good than harm, I might consider giving you another chance, but you're too stupid to understand the concept of damage control. We're done here.”

 

“Lord Leo-- Gyaaaah!” He was cut off as a thick vine coiled around his throat, squeezing tighter and tighter. Nerr could see his face turning the same nasty shade of purple as his robes. She ran forward, grabbing her brother's arm. For a moment, he was too shocked to be upset.

“Leo, what are you doing?!”

“The world a favor. Don't be fooled by his silly antics; Zola is a monster, right up there with Iago. Trust me, his death will make the world a better place.” Maybe he was right, maybe terrible people _should_ be executed, but... She looked into Leo's dark, earthen eyes, ignoring the fact that he was pointedly _not_ looking back at her. It was so easy to forget that this was her baby brother, that he was still two years from reaching his majority. Camilla often said that they were reluctant to expose Elise to the horrors of the world because they wanted her to retain her innocence for as long as possible, but had they forgotten about Leo? Why was he here, killing this man, one of his subjects? Why were they letting him bloody his hands like this?

 

“I don't believe that you would harm a fellow Nohrian, Leo. No matter how horrid a person he is, _you're_ too good a person to hurt one of your own people.” A flicker of anger flashed in his eyes, though it seemed the vines stopped getting tighter at the least.

“Why should I listen to a traitor like you?” Leo hissed, disgust and hatred lacing every word he spat. “What do you care about Nohrians; you turned your back on them, on everyone. You abandoned us! You have no right to tell me what to do! You're not my big sister any more!” With every word, he grew angrier and angrier, his face flushing a dark red.

 

He had been like this when he was very young, she remembered, when he visited her with Xander or Camilla and wanted to leave before them. He used to lash out at her back then, and for a long time, his anger would send her bursting into tears. But as she grew older, and the people around her assured her that his anger was simply the knee jerk reaction of a child his age, she learned how to deal with it (especially after witnessing the same behavior from Elise). Nerr reached out, placing her hands on her brother's shoulders. She had to reach up to do so- when had he gotten taller than her?- paying no mind when he tried to shove them off, simply putting them back until he gave up.

 

“Leo... please. Don't dirty your hands, or your soul, over this... Killing your own people? You haven't stooped that low, brother.” She could see his anger weakening, and when he groaned out a long suffering sigh, she let out the breath she'd unknowingly been holding.

“Ugh. _Fine!_ You can keep this pitiful fool if you like him so much. You certainly enjoyed his tomfoolery at the fete.” With a wave of his hand, the trees and vines slithered back into the ground, dumping Zola into a gasping, terrified heap. Leo gave him one last, sneering glance before turning his attention back to his sister. “Just remember what they say- when you save a man's life, _you_ become responsible for him. Goodbye, Nerr. When the time is right, you'll pay for your betrayal.” He turned on his heel, walking back to his steed and lifting himself back into the saddle.

 

“Leo, wait! It doesn't have to be this way- you don't understand--!!” She wanted to tell him her plan, at least, the part of it that involved returning to Nohr, but he had already cracked the reins and galloped past the boundary of the castle. Her heart felt like it had fallen somewhere near her feet.

“I've never seen such a display of power...” She stifled a gasp and turned around. A bloody Hinoka was standing on the veranda with Azura and her retainers. Jakob pushed past her, though with more restraint than he might usually show, and ran towards Nerr.

 

“Oh goodness, milady- what happened to you? Your legs are frostbitten!” She looked down, the tears in her tights showing the beginnings of chilblains. Now that she was made aware of it, she could feel her stomach burning uncomfortably as her blouse scrubbed the inflamed flesh.

“Oh, it was just a little magic. You know I can't tolerate cold.”

“Indeed, I do. Come milady, you need to sit while I heal you.” She let him lead her back to the deck. The red leather of Hinoka's boots were stained with even darker splotches, and she just recalled what the older princess had said about her brother. She laughed dryly.

 

“Really? _That's_ powerful to you? That was just Leo playing around.”

“Is that meant to be a joke, Nerr?” Azura asked, her voice stiff.

“No. It's meant to be a warning. I've seen Leo train seriously; he can reduce a boulder to sand when he really wants to.”

“Yes. Prince Leo is quite a gifted dark mage. He's feared and respected throughout all of Nohr.” Jakob intoned, placing his hand on Nerr's shoulder as he healed her (he had lost his staff, it seemed, and was now using one of the strange rods that Sakura used).

 

It wasn't necessary, to establish contact, and more often than not, Gunther used to chide him for doing it when he healed her after training, but Nerr appreciated the gesture, as well as the sensation of touch. A month in Hoshido was enough time for her to miss the things she had taken for granted back home in Norh, physical contact being one of them. Despite claiming that they were her loving sisters, Hinoka and Sakura did not hug her. Camilla and Elise were always embracing her, kissing her cheeks and forehead, holding her hands, and she returned the gestures just as enthusiastically. Felicia, Lilith and Flora too were purveyors of hugs and affection, and though she was only allowed to extend the same warmth to the men in her life on the rarest of occasions, it was enough for her to constantly feel surrounded with a warm blanket of love. Hoshidans did not act like that, it seemed, and it left her feeling cold.

000

 

As much as Hinoka had wanted to kill Zola to ensure he couldn't hurt anyone else, Nerr adamantly refused, telling her blood sister that she had not stopped Leo from executing him just so someone else could. Besides, as battered and weakened as he was, he was not threat. Just for good measure, the Nohrian princess broke both of his hands, snapping each of his fingers like dried sticks. The sounds of bones cracking made her want to vomit more so than his ragged screams, but she reminded herself (as well as Zola) that he could not be a threat if he could not attack anyone. He would be left for the mercy of the daimyo once they found him.

 

Scouring the large castle was no easy task, especially when they had to step over the bodies of so many dead soldiers. Puddles of blood and piles of organs were already attracting flies, and the stench was overwhelming in places. Hayato had run from one of the particularly bloody halls, retching loudly. Nerr did not blame him- she was on the verge of vomiting herself. The one good thing to have come from the whole ordeal was that the real Izana, as well as the castle staff, had been unharmed, locked in the bottom most part of the castle. She would have assumed it was a dungeon, given the fact that there were cells, but the entire room had been bathed in the warm glow of candlelight, with incense perfuming the air. Sakura had almost sobbed upon seeing the daimyo, just as regal and god-like as Zola has portrayed him as, lying prone in one of the cells, but it turned out he was simply sleeping. He beamed at the princesses as they informed him and all the other imprisoned Izumites that the threat was dealt with and they were safe.

 

“Wooo! You all saved me! My heroines!” He cooed once they were back upstairs in his personal chambers. “This calls for a celebratory feast! No- better idea! An all-night party! We'll wear pajamas and eat bonbons- I just got the most decadent shipment of chocolate imported from Nestra, oh, it's just to _die_ for! Let's get this party started, shall we? Izana in the house! Who's house? Izana's house!” The daimyo poured himself a cup of something clear that smelled strongly of alcohol, throwing his head back and swallowing it in one gulp. Nerr could only stare in utter bemusement. Hinoka and Sakura wore similar expressions, with only Azura smiling, breathing a quiet, yet very relieved sigh.

 

“Is... is this still Zola?” Sakura asked blankly. Her eldest sister shook her head slowly.

“No, but... I definitely think I underestimated his Izana impression.”

“I'm just grateful he hasn't changed. I was beginning to fear I painted him wrong in my memory, but no. He's as pleasant as I remember.” If this was pleasant, Azura was not a very good judge of character. Nerr cleared her throat slightly.

“Um, Lord Izana? Before we get to the bonbons, I have a few questions. Have you witnessed any nearby conflicts involving Nohrians?” The pale man was in the process of pouring himself another cup when he nodded.

 

“Oh, yes. What a bunch of party poopers _they_ were. I was entertaining Yoji-sama, from Fuuma, you know him, right? We were listening to some music, getting massages- you know, the usual- when I heard, like, a big explosion or something outside. I went to see what was going on, and I saw these Nohrians, because who else wears such dreary clothes? I thought they might've been hurt, so I invited them in for my healers to look them over, and wouldn't you know it, the moment they got in the castle, they forced us all into the dungeons! Given that we're all about love, peace, and chicken grease here in Izumo, we don't exactly have a world-class military force, so they got themselves nice and comfy without too much of a fight.”

“How long ago did this happen?” Hinoka asked seriously. The daimyo frowned a bit, tapping a finger against his lip.

 

“Hmmm... a week or two, I suppose? It's hard to mark the passage of time in the dungeons. Fortunately, since we don't use them for anything but storage, I had them outfitted with more comfortable bedding and snacks. I think my servants enjoyed the time off!” He laughed, and Nerr was secretly glad he was not as angry as she knew most people would be.

“I'm so sorry you had to, uh... _suffer_ through all that. But I hope you don't judge all Nohrians based on the actions of a few.” Hinoka seemed enraged enough for the daimyo and herself, but she at least managed to keep her voice even.

“It's despicable for Nohr to take advantage of your generous hospitality. Don't worry; we'll be doing all we can to ensure they never get this far inland again.” Nerr wanted to remind the princess that not _all_ Nohrians were like that, but she knew it would be a moot point. Besides, the eldest Hoshidan had already moved on her her hateful promise. “Izana-sama, I know you've been confined to a luxuriously appointed cell... But would you happen to know anything about our brothers, Ryouma and Takumi?”

 

“Well, I've heard _of_ them! That's something, right?” He smiled at the princess, but it dimmed a bit when he realized his joke did not go over as well as he had hoped. Taking a more measured drink, he leaned back a bit. “When those awful 'catch-you-next-Tuesday's would bring us food, I caught snippets of them talking about a battle. They said it stretched all the way to the Infinite Chasm. Maybe your princes just... fell in?” Sakura gasped, hands fluttering in a fearful panic.

“No... oh, g-g-g-g-go-- no no no no...!” She looked close to a breakdown at this point, and Nerr was beginning to regret allowing her to leave Fort Jinya more and more. Hinoka held the younger princess's face in firm hands, forcing her to look up at her.

“Get a hold of yourself, Sakura-chan. Your brothers are _not_ the type to accidentally fall into a canyon.”

 

“Maybe they were pushed.” Nerr whispered darkly. After all, Gunther hadn't been the type to “accidentally” anything, and yet, she's still seen that darkness swallow him whole. She was much too engrossed in her own morbid, angry thoughts to care about the glares Azura and Hinoka were both shooting her. “Hey, it happens.” She defended herself. It did. It happened, and it was terrible. The red haired princess shook her head.

“No! We've got to believe both of them are alive and well.”

“Unless they fell in.”

 

“Nerr,” The songstress whispered harshly. “To take a page from your book, I will _slap_ you if you don't stop talking like that.” Well, well, look who grew some backbone. The Nohrian girl was tempted to tell Azura that she was finally starting to act like the Nohrian princess she was supposed to be, but she was interrupted by a large (though delicate) hand handing her a cup of something warm. She looked up to see Izana... well, not _looking_ at her (his eyes were still closed) but somehow appraising her nonetheless. She had a feeling he was trying to shut her up in the most polite way possible, and honestly, she would gladly rather preoccupy her mouth with something other than dredging up painful memories. She began sipping as the daimyo spoke, her mouth instinctively puckering at the strange foreign taste. Well, it was definitely alcohol of some kind...

 

“I'm sorry- that was incredibly insensitive to speculate like that. But you must understand, I didn't do it simply to be cruel; it's just that that canyon is totally treacherous! Such a hazard. You know what I'm talking about, Nerr-sama.” He added as an aside, and she took a particularly large gulp to keep from responding. She didn't trust herself to. The daimyo once again tapped a finger to his lips, deep in thought. “Hmmm... maybe I can help by reading your fortune!”

“R-really? You think that c-can help us find R-Ryouma nii-sama a-and Takumi n-nii-sama?”

“It's worth a try. Mother never made big decisions without consulting Orochi, after all.”

 

“What do you say, princess? You look like you've got the devil's luck; maybe the gods will smile kindly on your future.” It was only then that Nerr realized Izana was speaking directly to her, a faint smile still in place, but the red markings around his eyes making him look more like a demon than an angel. She was tempted to laugh in his face. Xander told her about fortune tellers; they said only what they thought you wanted to hear- utter hogwash. Besides, she didn't need a crystal ball to know her future was grim. But unfortunately, this was no gypsy she could brush off; as a princess of Nohr (despite what anyone said), she had an obligation to be respectful and act as a testament to her people.

 

“I'm a bit skeptical of fortune telling, but I would be honored that you'd think me worth wasting your talents on.”

“Oh, no one wastes anything on pretty girls. Besides, I'm a descendant of the gods! Though, not as closely descended as _you,_ it seems. Alright, come over here, this is where my set up is.” Trying to hide her annoyance, the princess got to her feet, feeling the warmth of the alcohol she'd drunk spreading throughout her extremities. Azura, Hinoka and Sakura were following closely behind, and while she would have assumed getting one's fortune told was a private thing, Izana had not said they should leave. The daimyo had settled himself behind a low table with a large, low bowl filled with sand. A crystal pendulum was suspended from two elevated handles.

 

“Sit there, yes, that's right. Now, place your hand on the other handle.” Nerr had never seen anything like this before. She thought fortune tellers used tea leave, or looked at the lines in one's palms. Hesitant, she did as she was told, watching Izana place his own hand on the other handle. Slowly, the pendulum began swinging, picking up more momentum with every pass, etching lines in the sand. Izana's own voice was quiet as he began speaking, not to her, but to the room at large, it seemed.

 

“Oh, ancient gods... what's up?” He fell silent again, but after a few moments began humming a hauntingly familiar tune. “... _In the white light, a hand reaches through... A double-edged blade cuts your heart in two... Waking dreams fade away... Embrace the brand new day..._ ” A quiet gasp behind her caught Nerr's attention, and she turned to see Azura backing away slightly, golden eyes wide. The cadence of that... fortune? had been quiet similar to the song she was always singing. After a few more moments of silence, the man opened his eyes, smiling once again. “Alright, I'm done!”

 

“...that's it? That wasn't worth it.” Manners be damned. Hinoka frowned as well.

“I'm sorry, but that wasn't very helpful.”

“Hey, what can I tell you? I don't make the fortunes, I just report 'em.” Nerr got to her feet, stretching and feeling the spaces between her vertebrae pop.

“Well, that was a waste of time. I think I'll be leaving now.”

“Oh pooh, I had hoped you might stay a little longer. Well, I suppose you'll want to find your brothers post haste, but I can assure you, there's no rush. The gods tell me what they wish for me to know, and they wish for _you_ to know that, at present, the princes are doing A-okay.” A tremulous smile tugged at Sakura's lips.

 

“A-are you sure? I-I-I'd really like to believe that...” Izana got to his feet as well, stepping away from the table and placing a gentle hand atop Sakura's head.

“I swear it on my gold-plated statue of myself. They're fine. Now really, it's getting late, and soldiers need their beauty sleep just as much as handsome daimyos. You should stay for the night.” Nerr sighed deeply. He was right; it wasn't as if they marched very far during the night- or whatever passed for night in Hoshido.

“Well, thank you, Lord Izana, for your hospitality _and_ services as a fortune teller. I suppose you're right; we can start our march anew in the morning. They have brothers to look for, after all. I have a despot to topple.”

 

“We should go tell the others we're staying in Izumo for the night.” Azura moved towards the door, Sakura on her heels like a puppy.

“I-I'll go help you!” Nerr watched as her blood sisters and Azura left, and moved to follow them when a firm, but gentle hand enclosed her wrist. Izana was no longer smiling, his face solemn and tinged with sadness.

“Nerr-sama? One last thing; the gods asked me to pass this message on to you. 'What's past is past, and dwelling on it will only bring you pain. _You_ must shape the fate of your thoughts now'...” She blanched slightly. That... was surprisingly insightful for some phony fortune teller, but maybe he had just gleaned that something unpleasant happened judging by her sullen mood earlier--

 

“I know you're trying to figure out what hack scheme I used to come up with that. I tell you in earnest, dear princess, those words are from the god's lips to your ears. Look for yourself.” He gestured to the plate of sand. Just barely visible amongst the fine white grains, she could make out the faint shape of wings. Her fingers reached up unconsciously to brush against her brass hairpin. Izana nodded heavily. “Butterflies are an omen of change. Whether it will be a good change or a bad change is ultimately up to you.” Nerr lowered her hand, fingers curling into a tight fist. First the Hoshidans, now even the gods? Everyone demanded she give up everything she had known, everything that made her who she was- but who would she be then? Inhaling deeply, she looked back to the daimyo, her eyes and voice cold.

 

“No offense, Lord Izana, but you can tell the gods that they know _nothing_ of the human heart, and that they can all go to Hell and _die.”_ The regal man sighed, shaking his head sadly.

“They said you'd say that...”

000

 

Izana, true to his word, had arranged rooms for everyone in the royal traveling party, insisting that they join him for a feast. Honestly, it seemed that he was just the sort to jump at any excuse to break out the alcohol. Nerr had not had the stomach to join the lively feasting, instead, wandering the castle's halls and, occasionally, helping the staff move the bodies of fallen Nohrian soldiers. Their limbs were already stiff and unwieldy, but the blood of dragons made her strong enough to lift many of them, armor and all, with little effort. The thought of them being heaped into another shallow grave made her skin crawl, but the polite servants insisted that, enemies or not, their earthly remains would be treated with respect. They would be cremated, as everyone in Hoshido was, though their graves could not be marked as it seemed no one knew who they were. It seemed utterly horrible to her, to burn a person until there was nothing left of them but ash, but it seemed that was just how people did things on this side of the border.

 

She wandered back to the small garden where she had met with Leo, noticing that Zola was not there. If there was any justice in the world, he was underground, in the same cell he'd locked Izana in. The sky was infinitesimally darker than it normally was, and she could just barely make out the pinpricks of light of stars. At least the moon shone brightly. The princess closed her eyes, trying to cobble together a prayer for the souls of those poor soldiers who had fallen here. She hoped they would not linger in Hoshido; after all, if she died, she would rather her soul at least make it home if it could not pass on. Without thinking, she began humming. It was strange, it was _wrong_ that she knew that song, or at least... a similar song. She was tempted to ask Azura if it was some kind of Hoshidan lullaby; perhaps her mother had sang it to her when she was a babe, and it lingered in the depths of her mind.

 

_“_ _A double-edged blade cuts your heart in two...”_ She hadn't thought that Hoshidans made blades like that- it seemed every sword (they were called 'katanas', apparently) she'd seemed had a false edge.

“Nerr. I must speak with you.” She looked over her shoulder, frowning as she noticed Azura approaching her. She hadn't even noticed- gods forbid if that had been an assassin.

“No. Go away. I don't want to be bothered.”

“This is important, Nerr.” The songstress would not take no for an answer, settling herself on the veranda beside the other princess. “It's about that fortune. Those words... they were lyrics to a song my mother taught me as a child.”

 

“Seriously?” So maybe she had been right, maybe it was some strange lullaby, but then... How would a Nohrian girl know them as well? “Did your mother tell you what it means? Maybe it's about one of the ancient wars?” After all, many of the lullabies Nerr knew were about plagues and wars and monsters, sang to lilting melodies to soothe children to sleep. Azura shook her head, her expression dark.

“No, but I know it is ancient. That's what troubles me. The lyrics seem to speak directly to you.”

“I know they speak to you; they're very poignant.” And, if she were being honest, a bit pathetic. Like a depressed teenager's attempts at poetry. The songstress reached out unexpectedly, grabbing Nerr's hand with all the strength she could probably muster. Elise had a firmer grip than that...

 

“No, Nerr- they speak to _you_. Personally. The only ancient double-edged sword I've heard of in Hoshido is the Yatogami, and it chose you.”

“But... you said your mother taught you that song. Couldn't it be talking about a Nohrian sword? In which case, it's probably talking about Siegfried, which means the song is about Xander. That makes more sense. I mean, who would write a song about me? I'm nobody. I'm nothing.” Azura let go of her, turning her attention to the sky. For a long time, they sat in silence, until a weak sob drew Nerr's attention back to the other princess. Tears were streaming down her face as she looked up at the sky, her thin chest heaving as she quietly wept.

 

“Oh gods, what's _your_ problem? I didn't even say anything!” Azura shook her head, wiping her eyes on her long gloves.

“It's not you...” She sniveled, alternating between gasping and sobbing. “I'm sorry... Please, forget all about this.” _'With pleasure...'_ Nerr did not have enough room in her mind to deal with the excess of other people's emotions, but the sight of the other girl's misery still stirred something... sympathetic in her heart. She awkwardly patted the girl on the back. Comforting a person had never been so uncomfortable, but then again, she'd never disliked the person she was trying to comfort as much as this.

 

“Um... there there, Azura. Whatever it is... it'll be alright. Mmmmaybe you should go talk to your sisters... They're probably better at this than I am.” Sniffling one final time, the blunette nodded.

“I-- I think you're right. I'm... going to go back inside now.” Nerr watched her leave, waiting until she could no longer hear her steps before she sighed deeply, slumping over. Gods above, find Takumi and Ryouma would be a blessing; the sooner she could leave all this behind, the sooner that dark, heavy burden hovering over her would be forgotten.

000

 

A/N- Ha! Aw, man, Saizou... I love how his disgusting perverted tendencies are played for laughs. I mean, he _admits_ that he's watching the avatar either undress, bathe, or use the bathroom (probably all of the above), and it's just hand-waved. Also, I love Zola! He's such a creeper. Can't wait for him to come back. You might think it's weird that I have Azura know Izana, but given that the Izumite knows her at once (but apparently doesn't recognize Hinoka or Sakura), it makes it seem that she's been there before while they haven't.


	5. The Seeds of Discontent

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Ch. 5- “The Seeds of Discontent”

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Almost a week of marching led from the even grassland of Izumo to a heavily forested, mountainous terrain. Nerr wondered why they were going southwest rather than northwest; it seemed like they were getting further and further from the Infinite Chasm, but Hinoka explained that they were visiting Mokushuu, another prefecture.

 

“There's a path that leads to the Chasm from there.” Azura explained. “Mokushuu is one of the few territories in Hoshido that openly trades with Nohr, so it's likely that the soldiers we encountered in Izumo stopped here first.”

“I wouldn't be surprised if these putrid Mokushuujin were helping the Norhians.” Saizou seethed, disgust and anger radiating from him. Hinoka frowned slightly.

“You think the Nohrians might be threatening them?”

 

“Oh, I wouldn't worry about anyone strong-arming Mokushuu.” Kaze said lightly. “They're well known for their proficiency in the martial arts. Their military rivals that of the capital.”

“Then maybe we'll be safe here for a while.” Nerr leaned against a tree, sliding down it's trunk and sighing. Since leaving Izumo, she'd been even more weary than that first week in Shirasagi. She tugged her bag from her shoulder, reaching inside it. Her clothes had been in filthy tatters, and she'd changed into a padded sweater, though her ragged blouse was still in her bag. She pulled it out, also pulling out a small sewing kit that had been a gift from Camilla long ago. Needle and thread were always necessary, the older princess had told her sagely.

 

As Nerr opened the small gilded box that held her thread, a square of cloth fell out onto her lap. She picked it up, her heart constricting tightly in her chest. It was a plain black handkerchief with a scrolling border sketched on it in faded white chalk. One corner had been embroidered with silver thread. She had started it months ago, a bit of a side project to help her relax when she was exhausted after training. Gingerly, she picked it up, as though it might crumble at the slightest touch, folding it and tucking it inside her shirt, into one of the cups of her brassiere. Camilla always kept handkerchiefs there, for easy access and because her clothes did not have pockets. She could feel it against her skin, just over her heart... She picked up a needle, holding it tightly. A twig broke behind her, and Nerr whipped around, coming face to face with the glossy eyes and manic smile of Zola.

 

“Boo.” At once, everyone was on their feet, weapons drawn, waiting for him to make the first move. The cadaverous man giggled, tenting his fingers, long jagged nails clacking against each other as the twitched and trembled. “Betcha didn't expect to see me here!” His cackling was cut short as the Nohrian princess drove her fist in his sallow face, the needle she still held gouging out a thin, but deep line of blood. He fell to the ground.

“Betcha weren't expecting _that..._ ” Before he could get back to his feet, she pressed her heel against his Adam's apple. “Oh, no you don't! What the hell are you doing, following us? You're massively outnumbered; even _you_ can't be stupid enough to be looking for a fight.”

 

“Relax, Nerr-chan.” Hinoka walked over, lightly pushed her away from the squirming man, placing the tip of her Amaterasu at his throat where the other girl's foot had been. The magenta flames that encircled the blade, though low, still licked at his skin, charring the fraying hem of his cloak. “He probably just came back to offer me the chance to castrate him. You know; fix nature's mistake. Wasn't that thoughtful of him?”

“Nooo!” He squealed, throwing his hands up to cover his eyes like a frightened child. She could see the bruises that still mottled the swollen flesh where she had broken each finger slowly and methodically. “Pl-please! I'm defeated. I did not show up here to challenge anyone by myself. I-I-I came to surrender! ...and to seek amnesty...”

 

“You should have stayed in Izumo for that, little man.” Nerr spat. “Do I look like a church that offers sanctuary? Even if I did, why should I trust you?” Zola seemed to sink deeper into the dirt, his trembling lips pulled back in a rictus grin of terror.

“W-well, to be honest... you shouldn't. I... I tried to kill you. B-but, so did they!” He pointed an accusatory finger at Rinkah and Suzukaze. “I-I-I heard all about what happened; they tried to kill you, and you petitioned King Garon to spare them. And what did they do? Kidnapped you and brought you to Hoshido!”

“Hey!” Hinoka pressed the tip of her lance into the mage's throat, drawing a bead of blood that sizzled and evaporated the moment it touched the heated metal. “The Nohrians are the ones that kidnapped Nerrida; all Kaze and Rinkah-san did was bring her home.” A hint of defiance shone in Zola's otherwise terrified eyes.

 

“N-no offense, milady, but... I-I'm not talking to you.” He looked back at Nerr, an imploring look in his eyes. “Y-you saw what Lord Leo was about to do to me. I c-can't go home any more than you can, princess. I am exiled. Without the backing of an army, I'm of little threat to you... but... per-perhaps I could be of some assistance...” The Nohrian princess remained silent, thoughtful. Honestly, she wanted to kick his teeth in, but... he had a point. She had offered mercy to Suzukaze and Rinkah though they were her enemies, and they _had_ in fact used their newfound freedom to stab her in the back. What kind of princess would she be if she offered kindness to her enemies, yet not her own people? Azura roughly shook her shoulder, snapping her from her daze.

 

“Nerr! Surely you can't be considering his proposal!”

“Can I cut him yet?” Hinoka twirled her holy lance, letting the blade hover dangerously close to the mage's lower half. He shrieked in fear, scrambling to get up and throw himself over Nerr's feet.

“N-no! Stay away from me! Oh gods, Lady Nerr, please help me!”

“Get _off_ her, you nasty, sniveling, misbegotten abomination!” Jakob surged forward, pulling the hapless man to his feet and tossing him away. “If you think I will allow you to touch my ladyship so familiarly, I--”

 

“Jakob. It's alright. I understand your protectiveness, but... I think I'll be letting him accompany us.”

“What?!” The thin woods echoed with a chorus of disbelieving voices.

“R-really?” Zola eyes shone with hope as he stared at the princess. Azura's were dark with anger.

“Yes- _really_ , Nerr?” She returned the blunette girl's look.

“Yes. _Really,_ Azura. As he said, he's no danger by himself. He may be useful. And most importantly, I thought it wasn't the Hoshidan way to turn one's back on the helpless, what with you being a benevolent, peace-loving country and all that bullshit I've been hearing. ...Or does that not apply to Nohrians?”

 

“It shouldn't apply to Nohrians like _this!_ ” Rinkah yelled, the air around her shimmering as it grew hotter. “Didn't this guy try to _kill_ you?”

“Uh, didn't _you?”_

“Th-that's different--”

“No, it's really not.” Saizou stepped forward, his scarred eye opened and narrowed in disgust as he looked at her.

“It's bad enough you're allowing these two possible spies amongst out ranks, but now you intend to bring someone you _know_ is working for Garon along with us?” Nerr crossed her arms over her chest.

 

“If you don't like the way I do things, then by all means, feel free to go off on your own. I hope you remember that I'm literally just going in the same direction as you people; our goals could not be more different. If I can show mercy to my enemies- ie, your _brother_ \- I believe I should be able to show it to my own people.” It was quickly becoming clear to the Hoshidans that her mind was set and would not be swayed. Azura shook her head, dismayed, disgusted, and utterly exasperated.

“You have a kind heart, Nerr. Perhaps _too_ kind.”

“Oh, shut up, Azura! You're just like all Hoshidans, admit it; you're as hateful and prejudiced as any Nohrian.”

 

“It's not prejudice if they live up to every horrible reputation people have of them.” Oboro shot back. “Maybe if they didn't burn and pillage everything in their path, people wouldn't have a reason to hate them so much.” Nerr fixed her with a hard stare.

“...I heard you laughing while you murdered people in Izumo. If anyone has a right to talk about how horrible Nohrians are, it's _not_ you. You all can say what you will; I've made up my mind. Zola is coming with me.” The dark mage ran back at her, lowering himself to his knees and bowing so low, his forehead touched the ground.

“Oh! Thank you, Princess Nerr! I can't believe that I let King Garon convince me you deserved to die. Everyone who calls you a traitor is a fool; what you've done today shows your true characters- that of a kind, brave, merciful leader!”

 

“False flattery gets you nowhere, little man. And remember,” She stooped down, grabbing him by the collar and heaving him back to his feet. She could see her eyes reflected in his own, little glimmers of red light. “I'm keeping you like the dog you are- on a short leash and only until I catch you shitting on my floor. If I don't put you down myself, I _will_ allow Hinoka to neuter you. What say you, Hinoka?”

“I'll be standing by, blade at the ready, Nerrida. So don't even _think_ about doing anything stupid, you putrid scumbag. You got that?” Zola huddled into a tighter ball.

“Y-yes, milady! P-p-please don't hurt me...”

000

 

As they continued walking, the woods grew more dense, only allowing dim, dappled sunlight to reach the ground in some places. Nerr had never breathed air that smelled like this, perfumed with leaves and bark and sap. It smelled alive, so unlike the almost flat, thin air back at the citadel. As they marched, Zola remained close to her heels, with Jakob and Silas flanking him. The cavalier had even suggested they bind his hands to ensure he didn't try anything funny, but she decided it wasn't worth it. Jakob had searched the mage and found no weapons on him. And besides- a small part of her was waiting to see if he would stab her in the back, too. She silently prayed that he wouldn't, that her mercy would inspire him to turn over a new leaf and perhaps help her return to Nohr, but mercy was often repaid with treachery. At least the path was more enjoyable than the one at the Eternal Stairway. Picking up her pace a bit, Nerr fell in step alongside Sakura, who was fiddling with the hem of her short cape.

 

“Do you know if we're getting close to Mokushuu proper, Sakura?” The young princess spared her a cursory glance, before returning her gaze to the ground at her feet.

“Um, y-yes... I believe so...” She inhaled deeply, and heaved a large sigh.

“What's the matter? Are you getting tired?” It seemed wrong that the princess had to walk while her much older and stronger retainer lackadaisically rode a pegasus. Sakura shook her head slightly, tugging at her cape.

“N-no... I was just thinking about-- about Ryouma nii-sama and Takumi nii-sama... Sometimes, I forget they're missing, and then when I remember... it's like a wound is freshly opened...” She put her had over her heart, as though she could somehow ease the ache inside her. Without thinking, Nerr drew her into a half hug, her arm wrapped around the other girl's shoulders.

 

“Believe me, Sakura; I know what feeling all too well.” After all, life went on despite who was or wasn't there, but from nowhere, a thought, a reminder, dug deep into the festering wound of heartache. “But please, just try to stay positive. Worrying about these things won't do anything but put you in an early grave, and we can't have that.” It was so easy to give advice to other people, advice she'd flip out upon hearing directed to herself. Sakura nodded, slowly at first, but gaining more confidence.

“Y-you're right, nee-sama. I-I'll do my best!”

“That's the spirit!” She could not help but smile a bit. This, acting like a nice big sister, was almost enough to make her forget where she was and what was happening. Nerr loved doting on Elise (and Leo, when he would let her), and this new sisterly person at least filled _one_ void in her life. The sound of metal slicing through the air was followed by a thunk and people shouting.

 

“Nerr, watch out!” Silas' voice reached her too late, and the Nohrian princess cried out in pain as something razor sharp cut through the flesh of her jaw, just under her ear. She pushed Sakura to the ground, stooping low and pulling out her Yato. She could feel blood flowing thickly from the small cut, and her flesh burned terribly.

“What the hell was that?!”

“I-I-I-I think it was a shu-shuriken...!” Sakura pointed towards one of the trees, where a large, metal disc was embedded in the trunk. The edge was serrated, blood dripping from the shreds of skin and muscle clinging to it's teeth. In the other trees, similar shuriken as well as daggers with small tassels tied to their handles looked almost harmless, save for the blood staining their edges.

 

“These belong to Mokushuujin ninja.” Kaze said in a low voice.

“I bet this is Nohr's doing.” Hinoka hissed. “Mokushuu is neutral; they wouldn't attack us for no reason. You let us walk into a trap!” She lunged at Zola, who just barely managed to escape having his throat slit by her Amaterasu.

“No! No, I swear, I don't know anything about this! This isn't a Nohrian attack; Nohr has an alliance with Mokushuu, but my squad was the last batch of soldiers in the country, I _swear!_ We even passed those left from the reconnaissance mission Prince Xander set up as they went back to the border!”

“Wait, what? What do you mean, an alliance?”

 

“The deformed one is correct- our great province _has_ made an arrangement with Nohr.” Everyone jumped at the sound of a deep, guttural voice speaking to them from the trees. A man in robes similar to Suzukaze's and Saizou's stepped further into the light, his dirty brown hair pulled back from his face in a high ponytail.

“Who are you?” Nerr raised her sword, readying herself for any sudden attacks. His dark eyes glanced over to her, a cruel smirk playing about his thin lips. The princess shuddered, but refused to let herself appear intimidated.

“I am called Kotaro, daimyo of Mokushuu.”

 

“And what is your quarrel with us, Kotaro of Mokushuu? We merely seek passage through your territory.”

“Yes,” Azura stood up a bit straighter, frowning slightly. “Our understanding was that Mokushuu simply traded with Nohr; since when are you beholden to them as well?” This Kotaro's eyes darkened as he scowled at the songstress.

“ 'Beholden'? Pah! Mokushuu is beholden to _no_ nation, be it Nohr _or_ Hoshido. Our interests simple happen to line up with those of those of Nohr for the time being. Once Hoshido is well and truly defeated, King Garon will grant us considerable new territory. We've long been waiting for the chance to expand once more. And this war is the perfect opportunity.”

 

“That's disgusting!” Hinoka shouted, gripping her naginata tighter. “You would turn on your own people, side with the _enemy,_ just for some deluded version of glory?!” Suzukaze shook his head, disgust marring his youthful features.

“Gods... I had always heard that Kotaro, one of the most renowned shinobi in Hoshido, was an honorable man... But he's just another scheming politician. I don't even have words for how disappointing that is...”

“The mistake you two made was listening to the slander about this festering pus sack.” Saizou had pulled a dagger from the holster at his hip, and was already taking aim at the daimyo. “He spreads rumors about being a gracious leader, when in reality, he's nothing more than a craven murderer. It's no wonder something as despicable as this would side with Nohr.”

 

“Hmmm... you look somewhat familiar. Have I threatened you in the past?”

“I am Saizou the Fifth- son of Saizou the Fourth... the man you murdered in cold blood for daring to expose your atrocities.” Kotaro, faced with such damning accusations, simply smiled widely.

“Oh, that's right... I remember now, some mewling milksop coming into my domain, shouting his head off about revenge... I let you live out of the goodness of my heart, and you repay my kindness by coming back where you're not welcome. Typical Hoshidan mindset.”

“Y-you don't even deny it!” Sakura yelled, her brows furrowed in anger. “Wh-what kind of horrible p-person _are_ you?”

 

“Oh, grow up, you stupid children. Only the ambitious prosper in this world; that's why nobles and merchants living in Shirasagi gets fat in the lap of luxury while everyone else scrambles for what few scraps they can get. The only difference between Nohrians and Hoshidans is that Hoshidans are so fucking stupid, they just give up and accept their lot without even _trying_ to make things better for themselves. Not me, though. I've got three whores from the royal family in the palm of my hand; I can end the war today. I look forward to building a new castle on the smoking ruins where Shirasagi once stood.” He pulled a handful of shuriken from the pouch at his hip, throwing them at Azura and Hinoka. Several hit the songstress in the arm before the older princess managed to push her out of the way. Hana and Tsubaki moved into a position to better protect their own liege, and Saizou lunged at the daimyo, slashing at his throat. The older man was faster than him, and dodged the initial attack, but cried out as another blow came from behind. Nerr had flanked him, aiming for the soft, unarmored spot just below his ribs. The trained shinobi still managed to avoid being impaled, though blood quickly began soaking into his shirt.

 

“You naïve fool...” She whispered to him, readying herself to swing again. “You're too stupid to even realize you're being played like a fiddle. Do you think Garon doesn't consider your territory part of Hoshido? Because I can assure you he does, and his war will not be won until you and yours are naught but bone and ash.”

“I never dreamed I'd say this, but King Garon and I are on exactly the same page.” Saizou snarled, charging at the daimyo again. Before he could get close enough to land a blow, Kotaro flipped back, readying his own dagger and pulling his lips back in a snarling grin.

“I'll cross that bridge when I get to it. Right now, I think I'll just focus on dealing with you lot.” He moved his fingers quickly, forming some kind of signs that Nerr could barely follow, much less make head or tails of. The air around him shimmered, and he vanished. She looked around, wondering where this warp spell had taken him. Bushes and tree branches rustled with movement, and she heard a gasp behind her.

 

“We're surrounded!”

“Then we'll cut our way through!” Nerr ran back towards the others, not wanting to be caught unawares by herself. She could see ninja and lancers with their backs to the tree line, but though they had a bit of added defense, they were still leaving themselves open to attack. Hana, Hinata, and she herself were the first to reach the first wave of fighters, their blades drawn. It was only when she was bearing down on the nearest shinobi, pulling to the side to avoid the kunai knife he was attempting to stab into her throat, that she realized there was a reason they had allowed themselves to be so easily attacked.

 

“Watch out; it's a trap!” Suzukaze's warning came too late as the Nohrian girl felt the ground sink under her feet, dropping her. She shrieked, unable to stop herself, as a sharpened, hollow wooden spike was driven through her right foot. As she dropped to her knees, her poleyns and greaves were all that kept the rest of her lower half from suffering the same fate. She knew, had Leo been there to witness the horrific scene, he would have complained that _this_ was why she needed to wear shoes, but it was clear from the anguished screaming beside her that the sandals Hinata and Hana wore provided no more protection than her bare soles. The shinobi she had been fighting bore down on her, a wicked smile on his face, ready to slit her throat. He was stopped short as an arrow flew in his eye, blood oozing thickly down his face as he screamed, reaching up to try and pull it free only to quickly stop as a jellified goop began trickling out as well.

 

“Don't worry... Nerrida-san... I'll pick them off... You just... stay right there.” Hinoka's retainer (Setsuna, Nerr thought her name was) reached into the quiver at her back, pulling out another arrow and taking aim. As much as she appreciated the other girl's help, she would be damed if she would “stay right there”, blood soaking into the grass mat that had concealed the trap. Hot bile flooded into her mouth as she looked at the spike still dripping, but she was strong, too strong to let such a thing stop her. She kept telling herself that, gulping down breaths so quickly she was making herself lightheaded.

 

Her leg was paralyzed by a potent mix of fear and pain, and she could not lift it, so she reached down, wrapping her hands around her ankle and pulling up. The gruesome sight, of watching her flesh slowly slide up the spike inch by inch, accompanied by the wet suction she could hear as the muscle and tendons scraped the wood, inspired her screaming far more than the pain. That wasn't to say the pain wasn't there; it was. It tore through her, overwhelming her brain until she could focus on nothing but the agony as her nerves were struck like the chords of a lyre. She could not stop the vomit that pooled into her mouth as she finally pulled her foot free, just barely managing to turn her head to the side to avoid spraying the two samurai alongside her with the contents of her stomach. As much as she wanted to, she could not stand- the spike had been hollow, and a large portion of the skin and muscle that made up her foot was still inside it. A gust kicked up around her, and she looked up to see the snowy belly of a pegasus. Hinoka was hovering a few feet above her, one hand holding onto the reins, the other extended to her sister.

 

“Reach up!” If only it were that easy. Nerr could not reach her kneeling, so she shut her eyes and grit her teeth, forcing herself onto her good leg. She nearly lost her balance, nearly falling onto the other spikes that surrounded her- she could just imagine what would happen if she fell face first onto one of them. Fortunately, the eldest Hoshidan princess grabbed her hand before she could topple over, pulling her up with a strength her wiry frame did not indicate. Nerr scrambled onto the saddle, looking back down at the other fighters, still at the mercy of the Mokushuujin.

“What about them?”

“Tsubaki's got it covered.” Indeed, the male sky knight was swooping down, ready to lift his comrades to safety.” The Nohrian girl shook her head, breathing hard and trying not to vomit again.

 

“This whole place is probably one giant trap- how are we going to get through here. We can't go in the woods; they're teeming with enemies.”

“Don't worry about it; Kaze and Saizou are working to disable the traps. They're ninja- they can deal with this sort of thing. You need to relax; you're loosing a lot of blood.” Nerr was tempted to tell her this was nothing, she'd been hurt worse than this, but the fact was, cuts and gashes usually closed on their own too quickly for her to bleed profusely. She could _feel_ her flesh trying to pull itself together, but there was no way it could bridge the gap where it was missing so much tissue. How would Jakob heal _that?_ No, she couldn't worry; she trusted her retainer. Hinoka landed, and her steward was at her side at once, helping her down and checking her injuries. He grimaced.

 

“I... don't know how well I can heal this with the tools I have, Lady Nerr.”

“Just make it stop bleeding, Jakob. I'll manage somehow.” Sighing, the butler twirled the festal he held, a motion he had told her helped him focus his magic. Indeed, Nerr could feel it surging through her, trying to speed up her body's natural healing process but running into the same problem. It burned, it felt as if someone were cauterizing the wound with a branding iron as the healing magic tried to pull together blood vessels and muscle fibers that were no longer there. The bleeding had stopped, at the very least, and she groaned, placing her hand over Jakob's wrist to stop his efforts.

 

“No more, Jakob. Stop; it's not helping.”

“I-I'm so sorry, milady. I don't know what else to do...”

“It's fine.” She mustered a tiny smile for him, thankful for his efforts. She had somehow managed to grab her sword before Hinoka reached her, and now, she tied it back to her sword belt, reaching instead for her dragonstone.

“Milady, are you sure it's wise for you to make yourself such a large target?”

“No, but I sure as hell am not going to let myself be caught with only one working leg.” She felt the power contained within the stone be reabsorbed into her body and winced, the pain almost as bad as the healing had been, certainly exacerbated by her existing injuries. It was much easier to stand on three legs, and she held her injured foot off the ground, whipping her head around to scan for the next threat. She could not see anything, the trees were all a blur of varying shades of gray, but she could definitely _smell_ people, the sweat, blood, and general body odor of soldiers lying in wait offending her sense of taste as much as her sense of smell. The faint crack of someone stepping on a twig sounded like a ballistae firing in her ears, and Nerr turned to face the direction it was coming from. She couldn't see the movement, but she could smell the body heating up as it shifted, getting into position.

 

_“Wait here, Jakob...”_

“Milady, what--” She did not wait for him to finish, charging as fast as she could with only three legs, resulting in an odd, loping gait. An arrow hit against one of her thick scales, barely leaving a scratch and revealing exactly where her target was hiding. She reached into the trees, pulling out a Mokushuujin archer by the arm. The man screamed, trying to beat her back with his free hand, but she paid his feeble efforts no mind. Her mandible was already digging into his flesh, hot blood running into her mouth. A tiny voice in the back of her mind noted how _right_ the hot, metallic liquid tasted, but she shook her head to clear it, shaking the archer she held in the process. She heard a loud crack, like a branch breaking, and dropped him. His arm was bent at an impossible angle. He looked up at her, his face crumpled in terror and wet with tears.

 

“Oh gods... please don't kill me; I have a wife. A son!” _Finish him off...!_ The voice in her mind spat contemptuously; he was probably the one who helped rig up that trap. But... no. She hadn't come here intending to fight, much less to kill. She just wanted to get to the border. This... _man_ , would not be a threat to her any more. She stepped away, blinking hard as the air shimmered before her, distorting everything further. A familiar figure appeared in front of the fallen archer. Nerr could not recognize him by his coloring, but she knew that slicked back hair.

“...weak.” He spat, driving a kunai knife into the man's throat. Blood, that looked like thick gray mercury in her monochrome eyes, spurted out like a geyser as the Mokushuujin fell backwards.

 

“ _Saizou! What the hell?! He couldn't fight any more!”_

“Tch. It's hard to tell if you're really this stupid, or if this is all just part of your act. He's Mokushuujin; the only depraved scum as bad as the Nohrians. He'd have gotten healed if you left him be, you fool, and then he'd have come after you with a vengeance.”

“ _So you did that for my sake?”_

“Make no mistake, _princess_ ; I'd push you off a cliff myself if it were up to me. But it's not. Ryouma-sama wants you alive, and I am but an instrument of his will.” It was a shame the shinobi hadn't been there for her first day in Shirasagi; he would've slit her throat before Ryouma even had time to finish ordering the soldiers to execute her. Saizou seemed to notice something to the east, and pushed past her. Well, as much as he loathed her, he was probably too preoccupied with the Mokushuujin to think about leading her into a trap, so she followed, calling for Jakob to come along as well.

 

The bodies of more lancers and mages filled a clearing, Oboro driving her naginata into some poor bastard's gut as Orochi set about freezing an unfortunate archer's legs solid. Rinkah dashed forward, shattering the unlucky woman's legs with one well aimed swing of her club, and crushing her head with another. The smell of blood made her mouth water-- turned her stomach. She could see Hana and Hinata sitting off to the side, their faces pale and pinched with agony. Unlike her, they did not have two extra legs to make use of. Azura's high, warbling voice filled the area like a flock of birds, the air saturated with a magically charged mist. Nerr felt a little better as it sprayed against her face.

 

_“_ _Do we have any idea where that whoreson Kotaro is hiding?”_

“Not a one, I'm afraid.” Tsubaki had landed, and was surreptitiously wiping the blood from his lance with a scrap of cloth that looked like it had been ripped from one of the enemy ninja's clothes. “I tried flying further ahead, but there were too many archers there.”

“Then that's where the coward's hiding.” Silas said bitterly. The end of his javelin was splintered, and there were scorch marks on his cuirass. “People like that always surround themselves with 'cannon fodder'.”

 

“ _Then we need to press on. If their leader falls, these people will have no reason to continue their assault.”_

“They're in league with Nohr, Nerrida. Their leader won't fall unless we kill King Garon.” Hinoka sounded almost as weary and soul sick as she did, but the younger princess glared at her, feeling no sympathy.

“ _So you would have us kill every person in Mokushuu on the off chance that they might continue fighting you? What next? Every time anyone mutters bitterly about the monarchy, you have them executed? That sounds exactly like what--”_ She cut off quickly, not because she worried how the Hoshidans would react to her comparing their princess to King Garon, but because she heard a rustling in the bushes.

 

“N-nee-sama? What is it?”

“ _...I hear something. Gods, what now?”_ She turned, pressing her wings tight against her back to keep them from getting in her way if she had to run suddenly. Someone was stumbling into the clearing, their long hair loose and filled with leaves and twigs. _“Is that...?”_ A guttural, hoarse grunt drew everyone else's attention, and Nerr noticed the ornately carved bow in the figure's hand.

“Nii-san!” Sakura called out, tears of joy and relief dripping from her eyes.

“Takumi-sama!”

“Takumi-sama, you're alright!” The young prince ignored the people calling out to him, swaying slightly where he stood and groaning again. It was possible he was hurt, but so were they, and he had made it this far besides.

 

“ _Over here, jerk! You can take a few more steps!”_ Hinoka laughed in relief, walking over to her little brother.

“I'm so happy to see you again, Takumi-kun! Where have you-- gah!” She barely managed to throw herself out of the way as a faintly glowing arrow whizzed past the space her head had just been occupying. It hit a nearby tree, the trunk exploding in a shower of bark and woodchips. Hinoka looked up at the prince, who was still clutching his bow, her mouth agape in disbelief. “Takumi! What the hell is wrong with you?! That almost hit me!” He lifted his bow again, his arms trembling as if the effort was too great for him.

 _“_ _What the hell are you doing?!”_ His lips moved, barely enough for them to notice when he was so far away, but Nerr's keen ears picked up a few of the words his whispered.

 

“...kill...”

“ _...what?”_

“... _I_ should have been... the chosen one...” He began speaking louder, his voice rising with every word. “... _I'm_ the second prince...! You're... _nothing...!_ ”

“T-Takumi-sama... what are you talking about? You're acting strange.” Oboro's eyes filled with fear as she approached her liege, stopping in her tracks as he leveled his shaking bow with her head.

“Takumi, stop it! This isn't like you!” Hinoka was clearly getting upset, as was Sakura, though at the other end of the spectrum. She covered her eyes, weeping softly, her previous relief shattered.

 

“T-T-Takumi nii-sama... wh-wh-why are you d-doing this...?!” A deep shudder passed through the prince, and he jerked violently, muttering again.

“I am... ignored... alone... forgotten... But I am... more powerful than they can imagine.” Nerr was certain she was the only one who had heard his little monologue, because she was the only one rolling her eyes at his words.

_“...okay, he's clearly lost it. And in case you all have forgotten, there's_ _still_ _a battle going on. So just let the baby cry in the corner until we DON'T have people trying to kill us.”_

“Nerr, look at the color of his eyes; something's clearly wrong with him.”

“ _I can't SEE color like this, Azura,_ _but_ _I agree; something is_ definitely _wrong with him, but we don't have the time to deal with it. He'll be fine.”_ The draconic princess turned away, not willing to give his little tantrum any more attention. Takumi's voice rose once again, to the point that he was almost shouting, and certainly alerting every Mokushuujin exactly where they were.

 

“...nnngghh... I will not... stand in the shadows... any longer...! They'll all see me... for the first time..! They'll notice me... I will make them... pay... I will make them... make them... make them _DIE!_ ” Nerr would have been perfectly content to ignore his raving had a sharp pain not tore through one of her wings, the thin membrane shredding and bleeding profusely as a gust of wind exploded against the back of her head, staggering her. She had barely even registered the attack, but the dragon inside her was already roaring in pain and rage, turning around and ready to tear the perpetrator limb from limb.

 

_“You stupid little-- Did you all see that?! That little shit attacked me!”_

“Whoa, Takumi-sama, I know you don't really like your sister, but that's taking it _way_ too far!” Hinata cried out, distressed. Sakura began crying harder.

“Nii-sama, s-stop it! P-p-please!” Azura was biting her lip, almost enough to draw blood, as she looked back to Nerr.

 

“Nerr. I can help him. Can you hold him down?”

“ _Oh, I can do a lot more than that.”_ The prince was already aiming again, this time at her head, but she would not be caught off guard by a full frontal attack. She reached out with a large claw, grabbing Takumi around the middle and slamming him to the ground, with perhaps more force than was strictly necessary. The younger boy writhed against her grip, and she added more pressure. She could feel his ribs shift slightly beneath his clothes and skin.

 

“ _You are the ocean's gray waves, destined to seek life beyond the shore, just out of reach...”_

 

That had been the same song she sang when Nerr first transformed in a vain attempt to calm her down. Granted, it made her feel a bit weaker, but that silly lullaby hadn't been what stopped her. History seemed to be repeating itself, as Takumi's struggles grew a bit more ineffectual, but he was clearly still raving mad.

 

“No one notices me... no one cares...!”

 

“ _Yet the waters ever change... Flowing like time; the path is your to climb...”_

 

“DIE!! Diediediediediedie...”

“Takumi, listen to me.” The princess knelt down beside her brother, just barely managing to deflect his attempt to claw at her. Her long, lazuline hair fell around them like a curtain. “Listen to me, Takumi-kun...”

“You...! ...you are...”

“Someone who loves you very much. Someone who can help you. This isn't you, Takumi; this isn't who you are. You're stronger than this, you can fight it. Just listen...” She began singing again, the air around her saturated as though she were contained in a heavy downpour. With every note, with every drop of water splashing onto his skin, the second prince grew limper and limper, until it seemed that he had completely passed out.

 

“ _...is he still alive?”_ A weak groan answered her question, and Takumi stirred, blinking groggily.

“Wha...? A-Azura? Is that you...?” The songstress laughed slightly, a wide smile softening her face.

“Yes! It's me. Oh, thank the gods...”

“Ugh... where am I?”

“You're--”

“ _Talk later, you_ _damned fools_ _! Fight now!!”_ Hinoka swore under her breath.

 

“She's right. Takumi, you stay with Hana and Hinata; we can't risk... whatever was wrong with you happening again.”

“No! Wait, I can help you!”

“But--”

“ _Oh, let the baby have his bottle. If nothing else, we can use him as a human shield.”_ Takumi looked up at the dragon looming over him, anger twisting his features into something more recognizable.

“Gee, _thanks_.” Still, as Nerr lifted her foot, he got up, stumbling a bit, but otherwise looking unharmed.

000

 

Fortunately, for as insufferable as Takumi was, he proved to be an asset on the battlefield. He was not as quick as the shinobi, but the might of his Fuujin yumi and his incredible accuracy more than made up for that. Nerr cringed every time the holy arrows made contact with some unlucky son of a bitch, their limbs or torsos or heads usually exploding in a cloud of blood and gobbets of meat. Granted, her technique was not much better. Without a sword to make clean cuts with, she was stuck using her long, curving horns to attack. They were sharp, and slid easily into the flesh of mages trying to ready spells, but they were hooked slightly near her skull, and it took a great deal of shaking to pry bodies loose. She could feel their organs slipping out as the gaping wounds were made wider, blood spilling over her like a morbid shower.

 

“I think I see him.” Suzukaze's voice was barely more than a whisper, and Nerr instinctively looked around, trying to see if perhaps she too could spot the daimyo. Of course, she could not. She was getting tired, and without thinking, tried to rest some of her weight on her injured leg. A sharp whine tore itself from her throat.

“Shut up!” Takumi hissed. “You're going to give away our position!” The irony of someone chiding her to be quiet after screaming about how he would kill her at the top of his lungs was almost too delicious.

 

“Well then, why don't you go draw him out so we can end this battle quickly?” Jakob spat, indigo eyes narrowed. The prince met his gaze with his own look of disgust.

“I'm the second prince of Hoshido; _I_ matter. Why don't _you_ go draw him out?”

 _“Why don't you shut up, Takumi? Showing up at the end of the battle and trying to act like you're important...”_ It seemed the argument of who would rush in first had been settled elsewhere, as Saizou walked forward, determination and purpose in every step. There was a copse of trees that looked fairly impenetrable to Nerr, but a large shuriken came flying from it's dark depths. Saizou flipped out of the way, pulling out a kunai as he charged in.

 

“Get out of your hidey-hole, you cowardly motherfucker...!” She could hear clangs of metal and hisses of pain before a tangle of limbs fell out from the brush. Kotaro got back to his feet first, kicking the other ninja in the ribs.

“I should've killed you years ago, just like I killed your pathetic daddy. He didn't even get a single hit in, and I bet you're gonna be exactly the same.” He raised a vicious-looking throwing star, almost as big as his head, readying himself to drive it anywhere that looked soft enough.

“I don't think so!” Takumi leapt up, summoning another arrow and letting it loose. It hit the shuriken, knocking it from the daimyo's hand, the resulting shock wave enough to snap a few fingers. The older man cried out in pain, but quickly reached for another weapon in his left land.

 

“You won't stop me... I've done too much to fall now, to the likes of you...!” Nerr did not wait for him to adjust his grip on his kunai, leaping forward and lashing her tail across his chest. The thick, plate-like scales tore through his skin as easily as his robes, and he flew back several feet, only stopped by another tree. Saizou had gotten back up, and cracked the wrist holding his own kunai, walking over to the daimyo with a frightening calm.

 

He deflected the attack aimed at him with ease, smashing his elbow into the older shinobi's face. Blood cascaded from Kotaro's nose, but he could not even attempt to stem the flow of blood as the redheaded man grabbed a hank of his sandy brown hair, forcing him to look up. For a moment, Saizou looked at the man in silence, his expression hidden. Lightning quick, he raised his dagger, and drove it into Kotaro's skull, right between his eyes, eyes that glossed over in death in the same instant. The royal retainer let the man drop, before stomping on the handle of the knife, driving it further in, as blood trickled out thickly.

 

“...did I get a hit in?” Nerr might have been a bit more perturbed by his blood lust if she did not understand it. That horrid man had killed Saizou's father- it was only natural he would want him to die in the most horrible way he could manage. If she were in his shoes, she would not have been satisfied until she had turned his intestines into streamers, but silently, she hoped this brought the angry shinobi at least _some_ measure of peace.

000

 

It wasn't until they reached the wall that separated the city of Mokushuu from the woods and ensured that it was not booby trapped as well did Nerr allow herself to return to her human form. It seemed her pain had been dulled slightly as a full dragon, for now, it returned with such intensity, she had to lay down on the grass, closing her eyes as her vision swam. Her head felt like it was full of lead, and her back was hot and wet.

 

“Nii-sama! I'm s-s-so glade you're back to n-normal! We were all s-so worried abou-about you...!”

“Yeah, don't you _ever_ do that again, okay Takumi-kun?”

“Whoa, guys...! Stop crying; you're making me all embarrassed...” The Nohrian princess grinned slightly, despite her best intentions not to. Typical little brother behavior... She forced her eyes open, watching Sakura cling to her brother as if he were a life preserver.

“I-I don't care! We didn't know if-- if we'd ever see you again! A-and when you showed up all weird l-like that...”

 

“Yeah.” Hinoka patted his head, pulling out a few twigs, even though he was almost taller than she was. “You were acting like a stranger... We didn't know if you'd ever be the same Takumi-kun we all know and love again.” The prince flushed darkly with embarrassment, though a slight grin tugged at the corners of his lips.

“Well, it's definitely me, I can assure you. ...thank you, sisters... for your concern.” His retainers approached him, Hinata limping badly and leaning heavily on Oboro, though he beamed at his liege.

“I'm just glad you're safe and sound after all, Takumi-sama. We were starting to get worried there for a while.”

“Not me!” The lancer cooed, her face positively aglow with adoration. “I always knew you'd return to me-- to us, Takumi-sama. Now that you're back, I'll never let anything happen to you again!” Takumi's wide smile dimmed slightly as he looked around, his gaze falling on Nerr.

 

“...I notice someone's not gushing about how happy they are to have me back...”

“What do you want; a fucking parade?” She slurred slightly- her tongue felt swollen and dry. She was getting tired again. “I'm too weak to drag myself over to you to indulge in your pity party. And as nice as it would be to allow everyone to savor this moment, need I remind you Hoshido is still short one prince? What the hell happened to you two? Why'd you give your retainers the slip?”

 

That spiel had taken more out of her than she really had left, and the princess groaned slightly, letting her eyes slip shut once more. She could hear someone approaching her, or rather, could feel the vibrations through the ground as they came closer. A hand brushed against her back, where her sweater was beginning to stick painfully to her skin. Someone was talking to her- Jakob, by the sound of it, telling her that she was going to be alright, that they were going to take her somewhere to be healed. Honestly, Nerr was more interested in going somewhere she could sleep.

 

When next she fully regained consciousness, she found herself lying on the floor atop a pile of blankets, probably there with the hope of making the typical pallets Hoshidans used as beds (futons, she thought she'd heard them called) slightly less taxing on her battered and bruised body. For the second time, she found herself sans shirt, though this time, her brassiere was missing as well. Bandages were wrapped around her torso and shoulder, and as she shifted slightly, she could feel why. The flesh of her left shoulder blade pulled terribly with every twitch, as if the skin were struggling to stay together. She hadn't been struck in the back, but she remembered her draconic wing ripping apart. Apparently, the skin that stretched between the bone came from her back. The room she was in was fairly small, and though only her blood siblings and Azura there with her, there was still not enough space. She spied Takumi sitting in the corner, pointedly looking away from her. She ignored him, looking to Sakura instead.

 

“What's wrong with my back?” The youngest princess flinched slightly, as if Nerr had been accusing her of something.

“Um, i-it's not... healing well. Uh, J-Jakob-san had to give you... st-stitches.” Nerr frowned at those words, forcing her tense muscles to relax so as to not spasm again. She'd never needed stitches before in her life- she healed too well for them. What kind of weird, evil magic was Takumi's supposed “holy” weapon made of? She shook her head to clear it slightly.

“Alright, that's one question dealt with. And while I was getting new seams, did you find out where Ryouma is?” Azura shook her head.

 

“Takumi wanted to wait until you were awake to tell us.” That was... surprisingly thoughtful of him. As if he had somehow heard her thoughts, the prince glared at her- only for a moment before turning away.

“Don't get the wrong idea; I just don't want to have to go through the whole thing _twice_.” He sighed deeply, bending one knee and resting his arm on it. “...we ran into Nohrian troops just outside Izumo. There were mages, and they summoned a horde of Faceless. You all know how those monsters get when they get near villages, so we had to stop them first. By the time we'd cleared all of them out, Ryouma and I had gotten separated from the others. We couldn't even look for them, we had to retreat. We were outnumbered!” His voice had taken on a manic tone, as if he were fending off accusations, even though the girls had all remained silent. Breathing deeply, he looked at the wall, continuing his explanation while addressing the plaster. “...we got pushed to the brink of the Chasm...”

 

“So we still have no idea where he is.” Hinoka stated plainly, Takumi ducking his head between his shoulders as he nodded.

“No. I'm afraid not. Something trigger a massive landslide, and I was caught up in it. That's how I fell into the Chasm.” For the most part, Nerr had only been half listening to him speak, as everything he said had mostly been facts she already knew, but this... This got her attention, and she made an effort to sit up straighter, her gaze piercing the young prince's skull as if she might be able to look inside it.

 

“You actually fell into the Chasm? How are you alive?”

“I've never heard of anyone returning from there before.” The eldest sibling muttered. Yes, that was why they called it the _Infinite_ Chasm, not “The Shallow Chasm People Always Return From”, Nerr thought bitterly. Still, she waited with bated breath for Takumi's answer, a glimmer of hope sparking in her chest like a tiny ember. If he could survive- and come back, no less!- then it was possible that other people could too. She watched him intently, waiting for his words, her salvation... her blood brother glanced back at her, perhaps noticing the manic desperation with which she regarded him. He drew back slightly, a tinge of fear in his eyes.

 

“I... I have no idea. All I remember is falling. There was a period of darkness, and then I woke up in Mokushuu's forest.” Nerr felt as if her soul had been shattered anew. She let herself fall back to the sorry bed, too exhausted to spare energy to continue sitting, the pain tearing through her back as her stitches tore from the impact barely noticeable through the fog of pain clouding her mind and heart. She'd stupidly gotten her hopes up, and for what? More disappointment... Tears stung her eyes, but she would not let them fall. Her blood siblings were still talking., though their voices sounded far away to her.

“Well, we're just glad to have you back. It's a miracle to survive a fall like that. The gods must be watching out for you!” Hinoka forced her voice to sound cheerful and confident, like a big sister should.

“So, um... can anyone tell me how I ended up in Mokushuu? Or what, exactly, I was doing before I woke up...?” Takumi's voice had not returned to it's usual arrogant tone. Azura shook her head, forcing a smile.

 

“It's best that you don't worry about it for now. You should get some rest- we all should.”

“No! I need to know! Nerrida was pinning me down and I had my Fuujin in my hand when I came to. Everyone's been looking at me like I'm some kind of monster, and--...” He broke off, mumbling something about “backs” and “wounds”. Hinoka gritted her teeth, clearly not at ease with the direction the conversation was going.

“Well...”

“Tell me! What did I do?!”

 

“...you mean aside from trying to kill us all?” Nerr was too tired to even muster any anger in her voice. She wasn't even trying to blame him- she was simply answering his question. That wasn't enough to keep the other princesses from glaring at her, though, but she looked past their angry eyes, fixating her gaze on the rough plaster and wooden beams of the ceiling. Takumi's voice wavered violently.

“Wh-what are you talking about...?”

“I guess you were under some sort of spell. You staggered out of the woods like a drunkard and started ranting about killing people, then attacked us. I wouldn't worry too much about it; most of those arrows seemed like they were meant for me, after all.”

“Oh, gods... wh-what have I done?!” Was it possible; did he actually feel _bad_ about hurting her? Maybe he wasn't as terrible as Nerr had been assuming-- “A prince attacking his own men, his own family?! How can I show my face in Hoshido again?!” A deep, burning _loathing_ welled up inside the Nohrian girl, and she forced herself back into a seated position, paying no mind to the way her bloody bandages stuck to the blankets.

 

“... _that's_ what you're worried about? One of those arrows almost hit Hinoka- I was trying to sugar coat THAT detail, but why bother since you clearly don't care?”

“Nerrida, that's--” She pointedly ignored the older princess.

“Those who ride flying mounts are intrinsically weak against arrows, and an arrow made of wind magic? There'd be nothing left of her! You almost _killed_ your sister, and you're concerned with your REPUTATION?!?!” She groaned loudly, her head splitting as she laid back down once again, lifting an arm to cover her eyes. “Ugh... sometimes if I go to sleep in these stress dreams, that snaps me out of it...”

 

“Takumi... You weren't in your right mind. We all know _you_ would never do anything to hurt your family.” Azura tried to placate him, to lessen the sting of Nerr's words, but it was clear the damage was done. Takumi buried his face in his hands, trembling slightly.

“That's small comfort right now, I'm afraid...” His voice was muffled by his gloves. Sakura approached him, trembling slightly, and resting a tiny hand on his head.

“W-well, I'm sorry you feel that way, n-nii-sama, but... it's the truth. A-all that matters is that you're here now an-and we're almost a family again. We just need to find Ryouma nii-sama, and everything will be f-fine again.”

“You'll help us look for him, yes? Something along the way might help jog your memory.” Slowly, the prince looked up at Azura, wearing an almost dazed expression similar to the way he'd looked back in the forest.

 

“...yes. If you all can forgive me for all the hurtful things I've said and done...”

“You don't even need to ask, Takumi-kun. Dwelling on the past will help no one. We need to keep moving forward.”

“Thank you. I also need to thank you... Azura nee-san.” The songstress gasped, a slight smile tugging at her lips.

“Oh! You called me-- I mean... you're quite welcome, Takumi-kun.” Her smile faltered slightly as she inhaled deeply before coughing. Her already pale complexion had taken on an almost ashen color. Nerr frowned slightly- the blunette had been struck by shuriken before the battle even began, and they always made _her_ dizzy. Maybe she hadn't been treated properly.

 

“Are you alright, Azura? You don't look well.” Her coughing spell subsided, the songstress paused for a moment, giving Nerr a befuddled look.

“...I'm fine, thank you. I'm just a bit tired, is all.”

“Yeah, I think we're all tired.” Hinoka got to her feet, stretching her arms above her head. “Since we have lodgings for the night, we should all get some rest.”

 

Nerr woke the next morning feeling even more tired than she had before she fell asleep, her entire body a massive ache. The pain from her back seemed to be stretching around to her ribs, and they burned. She could hear a commotion outside her room, and threw the covers from her as gingerly as she could so as to not further exacerbate her wound. Judging by the even tighter tugging, it was safe to say someone- most likely Jakob- had restitched the hole in her shoulder some time after she'd fallen asleep. She wanted to get up, to see what all the commotion was about, but as the blankets were pulled away, she stilled. She could see right through her foot, like there was a window in the flesh. She could see into the hole- it was not healed all that well- a cross section of muscle fibers and metatarsals. The bones running the length of the foot were visibly cracked, but healing and mostly intact. But that was all there was- just bone. No skin, no muscle... That pound of flesh had been left on the battlefield. It was only through the blessed miracle of magic that she was not bleeding to death, but there was no way she would be able to walk like this. The thought of putting any weight on her injured foot was enough to bring a mouthful of vomit rushing back up her throat, and she swallowed hard, coughing. She would just have to... make do. She always had before.

 

As carefully as she could, Nerr climbed onto her hands and knees, crawling towards the door. She felt like she was trying to sneak around undetected, like she used to as a child. The thought of how silly she looked (especially if she lowered her torso further to the ground with her butt sticking in the air) was enough to make her giggle slightly. She had to laugh, because the only other alternative was breaking down in tears at the thought that even something as simple as _walking_ had been taken from her.

 

Prying the sliding door open was much more difficult from this vantage point, but she managed to open a gap large enough to squeeze through. The Hoshidan royals, Azura included, and their retainers, were gathered in one corner of the adjacent room, those who did not fall into either category on the other. Nerr noticed that Jakob and Silas stood further from the others, Zola even further from them still. In fact, it was the cowering mage who noticed her first. It seemed that his initial response would have been to call out to her, but he took one look at the animated group of Hoshidans, and timidly tapped Silas' arm to get his attention. The cavalier pulled away from the other man's touch, but dropped any pretense of disgust as he saw Nerr crouched in the door frame. She gave him a little wave, and at once, her childhood friend was at her side, pulling her to her feet and carrying most of her weight so she could hop over to their corner.

 

“You really shouldn't be up yet. You're not healed.”

“Well, all the talking woke me up.” Jakob scoffed.

“Of course it did. I tried telling those horrid Hoshidans to take their rabble rousing elsewhere, but once they get excited, nothing else matters.” He looked at her, averting his gaze slightly as a flush stained his cheeks. “I wish you had called for me before presenting yourself, milady, but I understand it would have been nigh impossible to hear yourself think over their chatter.” The princess blinked in confusion, but then realized just how cool her torso felt. She was still only donned in bandages. To her great surprise, as well as the other men, Zola unfastened his shabby mauve cloak, handing it to her with a trembling hand. The steward took it in her stead, draping it over her shoulders. As easy as it would have been to simply ignore the gesture, saying that the tittering fool owed her that and then some for trying to kill her, it was not in Nerr's nature to be unappreciative. Perhaps it stemmed from having so little in the citadel, but she cherished every act of kindness shown towards her.

 

“Thank you, Zola.” The dark mage beamed at her acknowledgement, but quickly looked away as Jakob fixed him with a withering glare. She indulged in rolling her eyes. “What are they so excited about?”

“Apparently, they found one of Prince Ryouma's retainers in the dungeon.” Silas informed her quietly. “That Kaze guy said they found _lots_ of stuff in the dungeon. Dead stuff that's been in there for a long time... Killing that Kotaro seemed to have been a public service.” It made Nerr a bit sick to her stomach to think that the only Hoshidans willing to deal with Nohrians were the exact kind of degenerates that Hoshidans considered Nohrians to be in the first place. Sakura looked over to the group, noticing their errant sister.

 

“O-oh! Nerrida nee-sama is awake!” She tugged on Azura's dress to get her attention. The songstress frowned slightly.

“How are you awake, Nerr? Sakura put a sleeping spell on you so you could heal.” Perhaps that was why she still felt so groggy. It was sad that someone who used to fall asleep standing upright with ease now needed to be hexed to achieve the same rest, and said medication did not even work well enough to keep her asleep.

“I heard a commotion and wanted to see what all the fuss was about. So you found Ryouma's other retainer?” A woman, about Camilla's age and certainly about her proportions, stepped from the throng. She wore clothes similar to Saizou and Suzukaze, though with a conspicuous lack of pants, not to mention her shirt was hardly big enough to contain her heaving bosom. The Nohrian princess vaguely recognized her from the ambush at the Chasm- she had informed Saizou that Ryouma was coming. She bowed deeply in Nerr's direction, a long lock of deep brown hair concealing the right half of her face. Something was probably wrong with her eye, too.

 

“Good day, milady. I am Kagerou.” At least this one was more polite than her male counterpart...

“Pleasure. Do you know what happened to Ryouma?” Everyone fell quiet at this, waiting for her answer with bated breath. Perhaps they had been too happy to find her alive to ask such a pressing question. The ninja nodded heavily, casting her eyes down.

“Yes. But I'm afraid--” Those words triggered an immediate reaction, the royal family all but howling in despair.

 

“No! Ryouma could _not_ have fallen to the Nohrian army. It's not possible!” Hinoka slammed her fist into the wall, breathing sharply as she tried to contain her tears. Sakura made no such effort, sobbing openly as she buried her face in her arms.

“Nooo! N-nii-sama...!” Takumi simply shook his head blankly, unable to process any more.

“I can't believe he's gone... I should've been there for him...” The eldest princess curled her hands into tight fists, wiping at her eyes before turning back to face the others.

“...We will build a monument to his glory when we return home--”

 

“Please, if you would allow me to continue.” Kagerou (or “girl-Saizou” as Nerr had begun to think of her as) did not lament or beat her brow as the others did. In fact, she seemed almost apathetic to the whole situation. When a relative calm had fallen over the mourning Hoshidans, she continued. “Ryouma-sama is still alive, as far as I know.”

“But... you said you were afraid of something!” Azura had been surreptitiously wiping the streaks of wetness from her cheeks, and sniffled slightly. The dark haired ninja nodded gravely.

“Indeed. I was _going_ to say, 'I'm afraid I don't know exactly where he is'. After being separated from Takumi-sama, Ryouma-sama met with a scout. Said scout informed him of a new civil strife in Nohr. Ryouma-sama departed at once in the direction of Chevalier.” Nerr knew of Chevalier, at least in passing from a map in a book. It was somewhere southwest of Windmire, near the mountainous wasteland. Hinoka's sorrow was quickly forgotten, replaced by a new hope.

 

“Chevalier... so he's on his way to Nohr as we speak!”

“I can only assume so.” Kagerou affirmed blankly. “I was given the order to return to Hoshido and report this information... but I was careless while traveling through Mokushuu. I never dreamed Kotaro would turn on his own people for a scrap of glory, but that was my mistake. I must apologize to everyone for such shameful conduct.”

“I would like to believe that even Hoshidans aren't crazy enough to blame someone for getting kidnapped.” Nerr said aloud, wondering what kind of society would even shape a person's psyche to believe they needed to apologize for getting captured by the enemy before remembering how ashamed she'd been to have been captured by the Hoshidans. Hinoka jumped in to change the subject as quickly as she could.

 

“We're just happy you're alright now, Kagerou. Knowing that Ryouma is still out there is valuable information to have.”

“Yes, but we should depart quickly if we hope to catch up to him.” Azura intoned, and the others nodded solemnly in agreement. As Hinoka and Takumi left the room, presumably to make arrangements as to how they would get to Nohr, the songstress approached Nerr quietly, taking in her appearance. The only thing concealing her was a roll of bandages and a moth-eaten cloak, but that was still less embarrassing than those tights Camilla had gotten for her. Thank the gods she hadn't brought those with her... “Nerr... going back may mean returning all the way to the Nohrian mainland. Do you think you're ready to do that?” The Nohrian princess laughed coldly.

“Azura... are you still deluding yourself into believing that I _want_ to be here? Returning to Nohr has been my plan since that slaughter in Fort Jinya. I would have words with my ' _father_ _'_ , and besides... I would much rather die at home than in a foreign country.” Golden eyes narrowed at her, but she had no energy to waste pretending she cared about upsetting the other princess with the truth.

 

Off to the side, the three shinobi were talking amongst themselves in hushed tones, but Nerr's keen ears still caught snippets of what they were saying. That it would be best to travel by sea, as Mokushuu's territory stretched all the way to the Chasm, and there were other ninja who undoubtedly shared their daimyo's dark ambition. Or perhaps, the Nohrian girl thought coldly, they simply wanted a bit more than what they had been born with, just as Kotaro had said. It was human nature to want more, was it not, but it always seemed to be those who had everything that begrudged others for taking more than their share. She shook her head. There was a sharp pain building below the surface of her skull, and philosophical quandaries were only exacerbating it. All that mattered at the moment was getting to Nohr. The sooner the Hoshidans found Ryouma, the sooner their war would be over, and the sooner she could set out on her own to find her way back home.

000

Y'know, Takumi's whole rant in this chapter of the game- as well as 80% of his character as a whole- can be summed up in three simple words: “Notice me, Senpai!” Gods, what I wouldn't give to see these characters in the possession of someone who knew how to milk them for their comedic worth (not me- I'm crap at comedy). Also, the way things work in Fire Emblem as a whole, but _especially_ in Fates, leaves me befuddled. You know those spikes that damage you are bamboo because what else would they be, so these people are essentially stepping on apple corers the size of PVC pipes and just shrugging it off like it ain't no thang. Well, it's definitely a thang now... And I know it seems odd that I'd describe the end result of such an injury as Nerr having a hole where the flesh is gone but the bones remain, but I think that would just break the metatarsals, right? Not, like... remove them completely (they're too long for that, right?). Muscle and skin, sure, because they're soft (like pushing a straw through a slice of bread), but not long bones. Or would pieces of the bone be gone as well? I dunno- any medical professionals who may have stumbled upon this travesty, gimme a holler and tell me if my assumption is correct, and also if such an injury could be resolved with anything short of amputation (or magic, because magic heals everything).


	6. Monochromatic Waves

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Ch.6- “Monochromatic Waves”

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Rather than risk heading to the border and traveling through Mokushuujin territory, the group of Hoshidans and Nohrians heading for the western half of the continent instead directed their march south, to the port towns that lined Hoshido's coast. It turned out there were were a few cities in Nohr that Hoshidans did not regard with contempt, mostly the richer towns on the coast. One such duchy, Nestra, was their destination. It was slow going just getting to the nearest port, however. Three members of their party were crippled. The spike trap they had run into had all but destroyed the two retainers' ability to walk- it seemed that Hana was missing two toes on her right foot, and several bones had been shattered in the other. The tendon at the back of Hinata's left ankle had been completely severed, and though Sakura had worked her hardest to heal it, he still could not put any weight on that leg. Nerr's injury seemed to be the worst, for she was missing a large amount of flesh (and no amount of healing magic seemed able to grow it back). Such damage could not be healed by anything short of a specialist, but she was also the only one who had a workaround for her problem. While they were traveling, she remained in her draconic form, hobbling around on three legs. It was as if she had natural crutches, she told herself, although being so large occasionally presented more problems when it came to traversing narrow gaps between trees.

 

It seemed like the natural solution to that problem would have been to simply fly over the obstacles- why else did she have wings if not to fly?- but the membrane that stretched between the bones protruding form her left shoulder were still mangled and ripped. It was strange and terrifying; even after two more rounds of healing, she still needed her stitches to keep the wound in her back from opening. She had questioned Hinoka about it as they made camp one night, and the older princess had hemmed and hawed for a long time before admitting that, while she didn't know about Nohrian holy weapons, Hoshido's regalia left wounds that could rarely be recovered from. It was a sign of how strongly the blood of dragons ran through her veins that she was even still alive- most people did not survive long enough for their injuries to hinder them. That did not make her feel better in the slightest. When she was younger, when Xander had first shown her Siegfried, he had explained how the royal family was chosen to wield their holy weapons because they used them to keep their people safe. Siegfried was as much a shield as it was a sword, in his words. She had even heard that Leo sometimes used his tome to help grow produce for the poor houses in Windmire. They rarely spoke of their arms as killing tools.

 

She pondered these unnerving differences between Nohr and Hoshido as she limped towards the outskirts of camp. They had procured some crutches from a village on the outskirts of Mokushuu, and it seemed prudent to at least take up as little space as she could while they weren't traveling. Still, it felt horribly awkward, having to put her weight on the wooden braces and swing her body forward when she was so used to simply putting her foot down and walking. The sound of something slicing through the air at a high speed was almost enough to send her hurtling to the ground in fear of another sneak attack, but whatever it had been already found it's target with a dull thunk. A boy's voice swore quietly, and the princess pressed on a bit further, that voice too familiar to be a random assassin. Nerr paused as she noticed Takumi in the distance.

 

There were targets set up on the nearby trees, and he was aiming his bow (only, they called them “yumi” in Hoshido) at one of them. Not the (horrid) holy Fuujin she was used to him using, but a normal bow that shot wooden practice arrows. He let one fly, and she watched as it hit the target dead center. Loathe as she was to admit it, he was skilled. Maybe... maybe that could be a jumping off point. Their training. She didn't really _want_ to talk to him, she _wanted_ her old family back, but a sense of guilt was gnawing at the pit of her stomach. She could talk to Leo so easily, and he was a haughty prick more often than not- surely it couldn't be so hard to speak to a boy who shared her blood. Swallowing hard, the Nohrian girl approached her brother (it felt so strange to think of him as such), waiting until he had lowered his bow to speak.

 

“Hello, Takumi.” The younger boy remained silent, grabbing an arrow from the quiver on his back. He notched it slowly, methodically, as if there were nothing else in the world that mattered. She didn't want to interrupt his shot, but she knew damn well that he'd heard her before taking another arrow. “I _said_ 'hello'...” She could hear the prince grinding his teeth as he let loose this arrow; it hit dead center as well, splitting the shaft of the previous arrow.

 

“Yeah, I _heard_ you.” Takumi turned around, scowling darkly at her. “Do you _need_ something?” Nerr felt her heart sink down to her stomach. Leo would've said those exact same words to her, but there was _nothing_ similar about the younger princes. Even in her mind, she could pinpoint the exact level of exasperation in Leo's voice, _'Yes, I heard you...'_ and she would know she had just interrupted him in the middle of a good part in the book he was reading, but he would turn to face her, his face open, genuinely curious. _'Did you need something,_ _sister_ _?'_ There would've been none of the coldness, the loathing... she wasn't used to her family _hating_ her.

 

“...no.” She said quietly, her voice growing cold as well. “No, I don't _need_ anything from you. I mean, maybe I was hoping we could _chat_ _\--_ ”

“Yeah, the thing is, I'm busy right now.” He didn't even give her a chance to finish her sarcasm, turning away from her and taking another arrow. “Practicing. Can't you see?” Nerr laughed wryly as he notched this arrow as well. Well, she had tried and failed. Her conscious would be clean when she continued to detest him. The shredded skin on her back burned.

“You really don't care to get to know me at all, do me?” No one could say it was just her. No one could mutter about her being unsociable and cold. Lowering his bow, Takumi turned back to face her, his face a mask of pure loathing.

 

“You hit the nail on the head, _nee-san._ I know I _should_ trust you, since everyone keeps saying we're family, but the truth is, you're just another Nohrian. You haven't been brainwashed; Ryouma and Hinoka are deluding themselves. You're just a Nohrian through and through. You _want_ to be one of them. I mean, look at you!” He gestured with his yumi towards her attire, blood still staining her blouse faintly despite being scrubbed, the tears conspicuously patched in places. “You've been in Hoshido for almost two months and you're _still_ wearing those filthy, Nohrian rags. They _stink,_ but you don't give a damn. You don't care who you make uncomfortable, as long as you get what _you_ want. Typical Nohrian scum behavior.” Every word he spoke shot through her like one of his arrows; not be because they weren't true, some of them were, but because he was using them as accusations against her. The princess shoved her pain deep inside where it couldn't hurt, willing her eyes to dry in the process. She smiled coldly. Xander had always taught her not to “let it show”, so she would mask her misery with contempt.

 

“You're right. I _would_ rather cling to filthy Nohrian scraps than associate myself with your putrid, hateful, savage country. You exemplify Hoshido, Takumi. Your undeserved arrogance and narrow minded stupidity... Can you even wonder why everybody hates you?” She's intended to mean why Nohrians hated Hoshido as a whole, but she could see the flash of pain in his eyes at her words, barely there but a substantial enough change that it was clear he took her words to mean that everyone hated _him_ personally _. S_ he latched onto his pain. Good. She _wanted_ him to feel terrible, she wanted her words to wound him just as much as his wounded her. “I'm glad we had this talk, _brother._ ”

 

She turned her back to him and limped away, back to her own corner of the outskirts of camp, back to her solitude. There was a lesson to be learned here- not that she was skilled at beating people back with her words; she'd learned how to do that when she'd studied the art of negotiation. No, she had learned better than to try and forge any bonds with the Hoshidans. All of them were probably exactly the same as Takumi. _This,_ trying and failing, was worse than anything. Being alone of her own volition was better than being alone because she had been rejected.

000

 

It had taken another week before they reached the nearest port with ships that would sail to Nestra, and it would take five more days- if they were lucky and the winds were in their sails- before they docked in Nohr. Nerr's heart pounded like a war drum as she anticipated returning home- not her home, her true home, but close enough that perhaps, the pain in her skull might ease off a bit. She had never sailed before, and though her soul felt lighter amidst the endless expanse of the sea, the rocking of the boat was nigh intolerable on crutches. She deigned to remain in her draconic form, claws finding traction in the rough floorboards easier than her toes could find purchase. Despite not being able to see the varying shades of blue of the water and sky, she could lean her overly long neck over the side of the railing, feeling the fine mist of the foam-capped waves splashing against her thick hide. The water sang to her- more than once, she was overcome with the urge to jump into the undulating sea, and even though her conscious mind reminded her that she didn't know how to swim, the voice in the back of her head would always respond that it would be fine.

 

“N-nee-sama. You shouldn't lean over the railing like that- wh-what if you fall in?” Whipping her head back, Nerr felt all the blood that had previously flowed to suddenly drain back to the rest of her body, leaving her dizzy.

_“Don't worry, Sakura. I'm not going to fall- I've got wings, after all. I was just a bit entranced, I suppose. I've never seen the ocean before.”_ The rose-haired girl smiled wide.

“I-isn't it beautiful? I've only sailed once b-before, to one of the provinces further east, but it's s-so much fun! We've been marching for so long- I'm really looking forward to r-resting a bit.” Azura, ever the killjoy, approached her younger sister with a dark look on her face.

 

“I wouldn't get too comfortable. Remember, we're on our way to Nohr; some of the passengers on this ship could be out enemies.”

“In fact, you might even worry that there could be a spy amongst us.” Takumi had been at the far aft of the railing, though clearly listening in on their conversation. Azura's expression grew darker still.

“What are you talking, Takumi?” The young prince whirled about to face her, his expression twisted in anger.

 

“You know _exactly_ what I'm talking about- that creepy, sniveling little... _mage_ from Nohr!” He pointed an accusatory finger at Zola, who had been lingering near the mast. He yelped and ran over to hide behind Nerr's flank. The princess had gotten used to him using her draconic bulk to hide from the hateful stares and muttered threats of the Hoshidans. Honestly, she didn't even mind it any more. It reminded her a bit of Felicia, she was loathe to admit- the pink haired maid often cowered behind her when Jakob yelled at her. A pang of homesickness struck her in the gut. “Who's idea was it to let him tag along?”

_“It was mine, I'll remind you again._ ” Takumi rolled his eyes so hard it hurt her to look at it.

“Of course it was. Why am I not surprised?”

 

“I-I-I-I'm no threat! I swear! H-haven't I been helpful s-s-so far?” It was true- Mokushuu's territory had been as dangerous as it was vast, filled with traps of a gruesome nature, the decaying, liquefying remains of those who stumbled upon them before still caught in some of the snares. Perhaps due to his nature as an illusionist, Zola had been very keen about spotting things hidden from them, even pointing out a few traps that Saizou and Suzukaze had missed. Takumi shook his head, not pleased that he had to begrudge the Nohrian man that. Hinoka shrugged slightly- as much as she loathed Nohrians, she didn't seem to mind them so terribly when they had utility.

 

“Don't worry about it, Takumi. His owner's keeping him on a short leash, and I've been keeping a very close eye on him.”

“I don't know... Didn't he kidnap the daimyo of Izumo? And pose as him to set you all up? And try to kill you? And, I'm pretty sure _he's_ the one that lead that sneak attack that got Ryouma separated from us in the first place! You know damn well he's plotting something else!” Takumi's voice had steadily risen as he continued speaking, and it seemed that he was a moment away from pulling his bow on the mage. Sadly, it seemed his rant was quite convincing to Hinoka, and the red haired woman scowled.

“You have a point. Alright, I'll go find a knife.”

“Eeek!” Zola's scream, so close to her ears, felt like someone had jabbed a needle into them.

 

“ _Okay, all of you need to just relax and back the hell up, alright? If Zola really wanted to stab us in the back, he could have easily done so when we were distracted by the Mokushuujin. Besides; how would he even relay information back to Nohr? Everyone is constantly watching him; even Jakob and Silas don't trust him enough to give him free reign. Of all the possible potential spies in this misbegotten squadro_ _n_ _, I'd say he's the_ least _like_ _l_ _y candidate.”_ The dark mage stared up at the dragon as if she were a beatific vision.

 

“Oh... milady, thank you. Your trust means everything to me...”

_“_ _Shut up._ _I didn't say I trust you; don't put words in my mouth. I just trust that you're not stupid enough to turn on me.”_

“I'll take what I can get.” Takumi crossed his arms over his chest, shaking his head even now.

“Nope. Sorry. Explain it all you want, I still don't trust him.” Were she a human, Nerr would have shrugged. She attempted moving her muscles in a similar fashion, and felt her wings unfurl slightly. Close enough.

“ _That's fine. I don't trust_ you _, after all- especially not with a weapon in hand. A little healthy skepticism never hurt anyone. Just try to be civil._ ”

“Don't tell me what to do.” He muttered, like a sullen child. Zola peeked from behind Nerr's back leg.

 

“Um... Lord Takumi...?” At once, the prince jumped down his throat.

“What's wrong with you?! Did I _say_ that you could speak my name?!”

“Gah! No! No, sir! I'm sorry, sir!” Terrified out of his wits, the mage ran back below deck, where he had been holed away since nearly the start of the voyage. The Nohrian princess felt a pang of pity for him. It seemed a shame to have to miss out on such a lovely view because one was in constant fear of their life, but she could not let him cling to her like a leech for protection. She wanted a bit of peace and solitude.

000

 

Four days into their journey found Nerr where she had for all intents and purposes planted herself- at the port side of the deck, looking over the railing. She was laying down- hardly wise for a human, but with her large size, it was safe to say she wouldn't go flying off anywhere easily. It had been three days since she'd last returned to her human form- she'd never kept this form for long. Normally, she instinctively desired to return to her more familiar body; aside from everything looking washed out and smelling too strongly, her emotions seemed to run rampant when her draconic blood took over. Anger, sadness, fear- those emotions were amplified a thousand times worse than she'd ever felt before. And were she not in the heat of battle most of the time, she would've been torn between wanting to destroy everything in her path and wanting to curl up in a ball and cry until she was empty. But with the soothing, empty noise of the ocean nearby, she felt very calm and relaxed. Without intending to, she found herself humming Azura's song to herself, noting that the ocean's waves indeed looked gray to her. The sound of light, quiet steps drew her from her revere. Sakura had approached her, hands clasped in front of her.

 

“Oh. Nerrida nee-sama! I thought you were Azura nee-sama for a second.”

“ _...how could you even make that assumption?_ ” Unless the songstress was also a manakete and just didn't feel the need to inform her. Timidly, the young healer approached.

“I... I heard singing. That's the song Azura nee-sama always sings, so I thought it was her, but then I realized I was hearing it more in my head than in my ears, and I saw you and--” She cut off, gasping for air. That was probably the longest Nerr had ever heard the princess speak without stuttering.

 

“ _Oh. Well, it's just me. Sorry about that.”_

“No, don't be sorry. You... I think you have a v-very pretty voice, nee-sama.” It had been a very long time since she had heard a compliment like that. She loved music, and had played both the violin and pianoforte in Nohr (though the later with not nearly as much skill as Xander). It had always been her dream to visit Cyrkensia, where symphonies and operas played day and night. Gunther used to teach her the words to many of the songs he'd heard there when he accompanied the king during his many visits, and while her retainer's singing left much to be desired, she cherished those melodies. When she was younger, she used to belt them out at the top of her lungs, enjoying the citadel's acoustics. In recent years, she only muttered under her breath when she was certain she was alone. The last thing she'd wanted was for the older knight to tell her that too was no longer allowed. She could feel her eyes stinging, and knew it was not from the sea spray, so she changed the topic as tactfully as she could.

 

_“Do you think we'll make port soon?”_ Sakura nodded.

“Y-yes. Petty disagreements aside, we've had s-smooth sailing thus far. I o-overheard the captain say that with favorable winds, we might even reach Nestra tomorrow!”

“ _That's good. Though if I'm being perfectly honest, I wouldn't mind staying at sea a bit longer;_ _it's so relaxing out here_ _...”_ She was not looking forward to being thrust back into the real word where her family thought her a traitor and her father almost certainly wanted her dead. The younger princess fiddled with the hem of her skirt.

 

“N-not for me... I've been feeling a little nauseous since I first boarded, t-to be honest. But it looks like you've really taken to the sea. You've been out here for days, h-haven't you?”

_“Maybe one day, I'll buy my own boat...”_ Nerr smiled a bit to herself. She hadn't thought about “one day's” in a very long time. There had been no room for them in her reality. Even now, it was hard to think about a future beyond the war when it brought with it the constant threat of death looming on the horizon. Speaking of which, the draconic girl lifted her head, smelling the air. It seemed to have gotten darker, but she thought that might have just been her own vision. But she could smell the air grow heavy with approaching rain. It did rain often in Nohr this time of year, and occasionally without warning, but it had been so bright and clear up until a moment ago. _“Sakura? Is it just me, or does it look like the weather might be taking a turn for the worse?”_

 

“N-no, you're right, nee-sama. The sky is so dark. And look at those waves!” Indeed, the sea was churning, foam streaking the surface as the boat was rocked to and fro. Nerr climbed to her feet, splaying her legs wide to keep from tilting over.

_“Let's head inside before we get soaked-- AUGH!”_ She cried out as the boat suddenly jerked with a large crash, sending both girls stumbling. She had tried to keep her balance with her injured foot without thinking, and the pain surged through her like a jolt of thunder magic. Scrambling back to her feet, Sakura looked over the edge of the railing, her eyes growing wide in fear.

“We-we've stopped moving! How is that even p-possible!? Oh, are you okay, nee-sama?”

 

_“I've been worse. But we really need to get away from the edge. I hope we haven't crashed into anything... Go downstairs, Sakura- I need to find the captain. He's-- gods above, what IS this?!”_ A sudden gust of wind knocked her sister into her legs, catching at the membranes of her wings and nearly blowing her back as well. Large drops of rain splashed across her, drenching her almost at once. _“I've never seen a storm come on THIS quickly, not even in Nohr! Is this normal at sea?”_

“I-I don't think so... I'm s-s-scared, n-nee-sama...!” Sakura clung to her leg, whimpering slightly. She cried out in fear as a massive wave broke against the port side of the boat, showering them in a deluge of brine. “Oh, gods... I-I-I-I don't like th-this... I don't like this, m-m-m-make it s-s-stop...!” She wept, gasping for breath as she struggled to speak.

 

_“Sakura, everything is fine. Just get back below deck.”_ The sheets of cold rain and rocking of the boat were interfering with her already poor vision, so much so that Nerr heard the thing before her long before she saw it. In fact, to say she saw it was an overstatement. All she could see were the violet flames that licked at it's feet, that one speck of color flashing like lightning in her otherwise monochromatic world. She could see it in flickers, as if it were blinking rapidly, the vague shape of a tall human in a dark cloak. Sakura must have seen it much clearer than she did, for the young girl screamed so loudly, they probably heard her all the way on land.

 

“Shhhhhhh...” The sound seemed to be coming from the figure, a low, raspy hiss, like air escaping a ball. Nerr spread her wings to their full extent, raising her tail and head as high as she could in an effort to make herself appear larger and more intimidating. She would have loved to charge at this thing, with it's cold, carrion stench, but she did not trust herself running over a slick, pitching deck in a violent storm on only three legs.

_“Who goes there? You'd best leave now, if you've any sense of self preservation!”_ In clear defiance of her words, the figure stepped closer, making that horrid hissing sound again. A memory struck her, of watching Ganglari fly away from it's holster and into another's hands, of the explosion of darkness and watching her mother die... That hooded figure that Ryouma had fought and lost to, that she herself had impaled only to watch it fizzle away... That wretched smell, of cold death and dark magic once again washed over her. “ _...I know you... You're the spectre that was there when my mother was killed..._ ”

 

“Shhhhhhh....” Was all it gave by way of reply. She realized suddenly, that this creature, this mistaken existence, was _shushing_ her! Telling her to be quiet! She threw her head back, roaring in outrage. It had escaped once before, but not this time. She had set herself to charge, when another feminine voice called out to her.

“Nerr? What's going on?”

_“Oh gods, stay back, Azura!”_ With a new, truly defenseless target, the creature slinked forward, moving with a grace and ease that seemed like it should not have been possible, pulling a sword from it's robes. The air in front of Azura shimmered, and Suzukaze appeared, kunai in hand, blocking the long blade with his own short dagger. He could not spare a glance for the princess he'd saved, completely focused on the beast still struggling with him.

 

“Azura-sama! Are you okay?”

“I-I'm fine, Kaze...” The songstress backed away as Kaze managed to unlock his blade, swinging at the figure, though it pulled back too quickly to be injured.

“Nerrida-sama! What is that thing?!”

_“_ _If you think I know, you have terrible judgment! Your guess is as good as mine. A storm came from nowhere and this thin_ _g_ _appeared on deck,_ _b_ _ut I recognize it- it's the th_ _i_ _ng that killed_ _M_ _other!”_

“What?!”

 

“Oh, gods! There's more of them!” Azura was right, it seemed. The leathery swish of beating wings was just barely audible over the howl of the storm, but there were more flickers of violet flames in the air above them. Sakura cried out in fear, throwing herself to the slippery deck as a throwing ax was hurled at her head. It lodged itself deep in the wood, splintering it. It seemed that even more were crawling up the sides of the great ship, clambering over the railings, their weapons, swords and axes, the only part of them that did not ripple like water.

 

_“Hell and damnation! Get the others- we need to deal with these things before they sink our ship!”_ Kaze and Azura nodded, the shinobi lashing out at a watery figure that was getting too close, and the two of them headed to the cabins below to alert the rest of their party what was going on.

 

Nerr turned her attention back to the hooded monster, only to find there was nothing in front of her. No ripples, no flames... it had vanished into thin air. She hissed in pain as a blade nicked her flesh, looking down to see more flickers of violet. This was not the creature she was after, but a different one, swinging an ax at her haunches. The blade did not cut deep, her thick hide and plated scales preventing too much damage, but the shallow cut seemed to hurt even worse, as though she had sliced the skin open on a piece of paper. Roaring in aggravation, the dragon swung her head, long curving horns cutting through the fiend as easily as any sword. The blood that sprayed over her face as she severed arteries and ruptured organs was cold, feeling more like the ocean spray than whatever ichor kept these monstrosities alive. As the bisected body fell back to the deck, it shuddered a bit before bursting, sloshing thick, foul-smelling liquid over her feet. These things grew more disturbing by the second, but she had no time to ponder them. The shouts and battle cries of the Hoshidans taking up arms reached her, and she addressed the young princess still cowering on the deck, her arms covering her head as if this were a nightmare she could block out.

 

_“Sakura. Go to the others- you'll be safer there.”_ Tentatively, Sakura looked up, her face white with fear.

“B-b-but, what about you, nee-sama?”

_“I'll be fine- I don't want these things breaking the mast. Now go!”_ Scrambling back to her feet, the healer nodded shakily and made a mad dash for her brother and sisters.

 

A loud roar, which she knew to be that of a wyvern (she'd often heard wild ones screeching as they scoured the mountains where the Northern Citadel was situated) drew her attention skyward. She could not tell exactly what she was looking at, the dark clouds and rain reducing what little contrast she could see already, but judging by the amount of fire, she knew it was something big. Glowing runes encircled the apparition, and she knew it was casting a spell, though what kind was to be determined. Before she could decided where to try and dodge to, the thwack of arrows sinking deep into a target rang out, and the illusory wyvern roared it's discontent. The entire being shuddered before it too fell apart, it's viscous liquid showering the deck. Another great, flapping creature, this one some kind of bird, appeared, landing beside her. It was as large as she was in her dragon form, with a long tail and plumage that seemed to glow slightly in the storm. But most important thing was that both mount and rider were entirely corporeal. Said rider, a woman shouldering a yumi, hopped out of the saddle, bowing lowly to the princess.

 

“Ah, hello Nerrida-sama. I'm glad to find you safe and sound.” A metal disk behind her head gave the impression of a halo, reminding the girl of the odd crown her mother had worn. This woman seemed much older than any of the other soldiers she had seen thus far, with faint lines near her lips and eyes, but she smiled amicably. Perhaps _too_ amicably, all things considered.

“ _I'm sorry, but who are you? And do you realize that we're in the middle of a battle?”_ The woman laughed, charmed, as if this scene were taking place at court rather than amidst crashing waves.

 

“Oh yes, of course. But such a battle is as a playground to me. I am Yuugiri, milady. I was Mikoto-sama's retainer, but in her absence, it's only natural for me to protect her children.” A look of sorrow flickered over her face, but was replaced with her calm smile just as quickly. “Yukimura sent me to provide you with my special brand of assistance; namely, slaughtering enemies by the dozen. You should see the trail of corpses I left on the way here- so much blood... I bet it will never wash out. I certainly hope it doesn't!” She laughed again, and Nerr found herself backing away slightly. She was not easily frightened, but there was something about watching a person laugh in such an earnest, delighted manner while talking about the people they'd just murdered that rubbed her the wrong way.

 

“ _Uhm..._ _what?_ _”_ Yuugiri smiled serenely at her.

“Oh, don't worry about it, Nerrida-sama. Just point me in the direction of anything you would like to die.”

_“...okay... Well, anything glowing purple would be a good start.”_

“Ah, an excellent recommendation.” Quick as a whip, she held her bow in hand once more, notching an arrow and directing it just above Nerr's head. It nearly scraped her scales as it flew towards it's intended target, and a pained whiny was all the warning she had before she was doused in more watery offal. The Hoshidan woman was humming joyously as she looked for another target, and the princess decided to let her be. It seemed she was quite capable of dealing with the enemies in the immediate area, so she decided to go to the bow of the ship and make sure everything was still intact. No sooner than she had approached the staircase leading to the bridge did a massive whirlwind knock her back into one of the nearby spars. She groaned, trying to get back to her feet, taking note of Takumi's shoes before she noticed the rest of him smirking down at her in the most insufferably arrogant manner possible.

 

“Oops. Sorry.” He crowed. “There was a Dragon Vein, and I thought I'd tap it. It's slowing those things down a bit.” Indeed, the massive self-contained tornado was keeping the fliers at bay, leaving them easy pickings for the mages and archers among their numbers.

_“_ _Yeah,_ _I_ _'ll bet you're so sorry you can't stop laughing...”_ It took all her willpower to not knock him aside with her tail as she pushed past him, reminding herself that she was older and more mature (and that she wouldn't give him the satisfaction of stooping to his level). The howling winds did not slow down those on foot, however, not enough.

 

A hulking warrior, his armor and pelts not as translucent as his flesh, came barreling towards them. Takumi fired off a shot from his Fuujin, and the left side of the monster's torso exploded in a fine mist, but that did not stop it. With it's remaining arm, it raised a large, partially rusted ax, ready to cleave through anything in it's path like the berserker it took the form of. It charged at the prince, only to be stopped in it's tracks as a thick, armored tail smashed into it's midsection like a battering ram. The fighter crashed into the stairs it had just run down. A human would have broken ribs and perforated organs at the very least after such a blow, if they even survived, but this being was still trying to push itself up. Nerr brought her front foot (her hand) down on it's bulk, thick claws tearing into the liquefied flesh. It did not burst like the others, and she smashed it again and again, refusing to stop until it was a paste.

 

If it were a human, it would've be screaming, crying in pain as she broke it's bones and stripped it's skin away, it would have smelled like warm blood, not a cold corpse and stagnant water. Gasping slightly, she pulled away, her palm stinging from hitting the stairs to many times. There was nothing but a puddle there any more. It seemed that the sounds of blades clashing had died down, and the sky was beginning to grow brighter. Nerr stumbled back, leaning against the mast as she slowly shrank. Her muscles ached and cramped, not used to this bipedal configuration after so long. Groaning, she sank down to the deck, holding her head in her hands. It felt like someone was trying to split it open, and if she had to see the overly saturated colors around her, they would certainly succeed. Footsteps approached her, but she could not open her eyes to see who was standing over her.

 

“N-nee-sama? Are you alright?” She made a noncommittal noise in the back of her throat. It had been days since she'd last spoken with lips and tongue- it took a while to remember how to use them.

“Ugh... is it-- is it over?” Takumi scoffed, arrogant as ever.

“Of course it is. Over before it barely began. Those stupid beasts didn't know who they were dealing with.”

“Y-you stopped a lot of them... you're so s-strong, nii-sama.” In her mind, Nerr could practically see his head inflating. This was probably why he was so insufferable to begin with. Reluctantly, she opened her eyes. After seeing the world in mid tones for so long, every color, even the washed-out brown of the ship, stabbed at her eyes. A hand touched her shoulder, a little tap but enough to make her start. She glanced up to see Zola beside her, trembling and fearful.

 

“A-are you alright, milady? M-maybe you should rest...” For a moment, she wondered if he was actually concerned for her well being, but quickly reminded herself that she was the only thing keeping the Hoshidans from throwing him overboard. Of course he would want to make sure she was alive and well. Still, he was right. She felt feverish and queasy, like she was fighting a bad infection and losing.

“You may have a point. I need to--” She cut herself off mid sentence, feeling the hairs on the back of her neck stand up.

 

“Shhhhhhh...” That horrid voice had returned, and she looked around for it's source. It was there, rising up from the water on the deck, it's form barely contained as it drew it's blade once more, large drops of liquid sloshing from it's arms and splashing onto the ship, only to slither back to it's legs and reconstitute itself once more. It was right there behind Takumi, so noticeable, not even trying to conceal itself, but the prince was so busy preening, he didn't notice. She sputtered for a moment, trying to form the words her mind was screaming.

 

“Takumi, behind you!”

“Huh?” Utterly gormless, he slowly turned around, his bright brown eyes growing wide as he realized he could not stop the incoming attack.

“Lord Takumi, move!” Before anyone could do anything else, Zola had pushed the prince aside, just as the curved blade came down. Blood dripped onto the deck, mixing with the sea water and the viscous fluid left behind by the monsters. Groaning in pain, the dark mage fell to ground, curling around his injury. Finally regaining his wits, Takumi summoned an arrow in his yumi, firing it point blank at the monster. It did not blast it apart- the arrow did nothing but pass right through the phantasmagorical creature as if it were nothing more than the wind it was comprised of. The beast looked down at it's chest, where the arrow had harmlessly brushed it, a low, staccato gasp issuing form it's lips.

 

“Heh. Heh. Heh.” It was laughing, just as it had when Nerr tried her hand at killing it months ago. For a moment it stood upright, before melting like the remnants of an ice sculpture, both it's blade and cloak dissolving with it it and slipping between the gaps in the floors planks.

“What the hell was that? Did I kill it?”

“No.” The Nohrian girl said plainly. “It just decided it didn't want to play any more. It did the same thing in Shirasagi.”

“What?” Takumi rounded on her. “What do you mean in Shirasagi? What are you--” A weak, strained cough drew his attention back to the Nohrian man on the ground. Blood was gathering in an ever larger pool around him. As he looked up, Zola's sallow complexion looked even paler, but a thin smile tugged at his lips.

 

“Well done... Lord... Takumi-- oh... I--” He broke off with a whimper, curling up even tighter. “I forgot... I'm not s'pposed to call you... by your name...” Sakura gasped slightly, kneeling down and paying no heed to the blood soaking into her white tights.

“Oh! Zola-san, y-you're hurt! Here, l-let me see- I can h-heal you.” Reluctantly, the mage moved, allowing them to see the gash cut deep into his shoulder. A sliver of white was just visible through all the red, and Takumi quickly looked away. Still, it was hardly anything that couldn't be treated with magic. Sakura waved her rod over the wound, and it glowed green as the flesh began knitting itself together. Zola hissed in pain, his long nails digging into the pads of his palms. Nerr leaned forward a bit, resting her arms on her knees.

 

“That was extremely courageous of you, Zola. I'm impressed.” No longer losing blood, the color began returning to his face, and the Nohrian man sat up, a bit unsteady.

“D-don't be, Lady Nerr. If I had time to think about what I was doing, I-I wouldn't have done it. I'm still just a c-coward through and through...” He shrank into himself a bit, and without thinking, the princess reached out to rest her hand on his (uninjured) shoulder.

“I beg to differ. That was remarkably selfless, and it flies in the face of Nohrian pragmatism. I think there's a bit of bravery in you yet.”

“I-I-I agree.” Sakura nodded vigorously. “I don't th-think I would have the strength to do such a thing under a-any circumstance.” Zola seemed heartened by their praise, but shirked away once more as Takumi cleared his throat. Nerr narrowed her eyes- if he said anything harsh to someone who just saved his life, she would be having many words with him...

 

“Um... Zola? I have something to say to you...”

“Yes Lord Tak-- I mean, yes, milord?” The prince sighed deeply.

“Please, you've more than earned the right to speak my name. I'm... I'm sorry I doubted you.”

“R-really?”

“Yes, Takumi; _really?”_ That seemed so out of character for him, she had to wonder if he wasn't possessed again. Takumi did not raise his eyes from the floor.

 

“Yes. Talk is cheap, and I don't regret not trusting you at first- that's just common sense not to welcome the enemy in with open arms, and maybe if my siblings had done so, we wouldn't--” He seemed to sense a rant building, and stopped himself, saving it for a later time, perhaps. “But... you may have just saved my life. Even though we are enemies, you put yourself in harm's way to protect me. Even I can recognize a heroic act when I see one.” Zola blinked, just as speechless as the others for a moment.

“I... thank you, Lord Takumi! But, the truth is, I'm just follow Lady Nerr's lead. If it hadn't been for her intervention, I would've died at Lord Leo's hands in Izumo. She saved me, and I saved you, so perhaps now, you'll have a chance to save someone...” Takumi's eyes widened as he looked between the two Nohrians.

 

“Wait... wait, wait, wait... Nerrida jumped in front of an attack meant for you... after you tried to _kill_ her?” The incredulity of his voice earned a snort of laughter from her.

“No. It wasn't like that, I didn't jump in front of anything. I simply asked my brother to spare Zola's life. After all, he might be scum... but he's Nohrian scum. It's my duty to show kindness to my people.”

“Yes, and that kindness was enough to sway Lord Leo. He merely exiled me instead of taking my life.” The young prince still looked between them, his expression twisting into disdain as his gaze settled on Nerr.

“You'll forgive Nohrians of any sin, won't you? They could drive a blade into your chest, and you'd just shrug it off...”

 

“On the whole, Nohrians are lagging behind when it comes to trying to kill me. So far, only... three of them have been serious threats. When it comes to Hoshidans, I've had to contend with Rinkah, Suzukaze, Saizou, Ryouma when he kept ordering the soldiers to execute me that first day, Chief Fuuga of the Wind tribe, your retainer Oboro, _and you!_ ” A cold smile stretched her lips. “Goodness, if this trend keeps up, I'm going to start thinking you all don't like me very much.” Takumi's face flushed in anger, and he turned on his heel, storming away. Sakura looked between her older siblings, torn. Nerr waved her off. “It's fine. Go, go after him. We don't want the baby to throw another tantrum.” With an apologetic bow, the rose-haired girl dashed after her brother. Sighing deeply, Nerr leaned back against the mast. Zola was staring at her in such a way that she knew something was burning in his mind.

 

“Yes? What is it?”

“...is-- is that true? Did all those Hoshidans r-really try to kill you?”

“Those are just the one's who's names I know. There have been many more, but on some occasions, they were justified. It was me or themselves... Unfortunately, I felt the same way.” They both lapsed into silence for a long moment, the only sound that of the now gentle waves and people talking in the distance. Zola spoke up once more, his voice faint.

 

“Um... I-it may not be my place to say, milady, but... do you really belong in a kingdom wh-where everyone... hates you?” Nerr remained quiet, his words unintentional knives that sank into her heart. That was the crux of it, wasn't it? Even if people, her blood relations among the, did not outright hate her, they certainly resented her for clinging to “filthy Nohrian scraps” as Takumi put it. They wanted her to be someone she was not, a beacon of hope in their fight against Nohr... but she could only be herself, a Nohrian through and through. The problem was, it seemed to be the same issue on the other side of the continent. If both kingdoms gagged on her like a poison, where could she possibly belong?

000

 

A/N- Heh, I don't know if anyone else has read the FE:F's 4koma, especially the second one, but I get a lot of characterization from that. I love the thought of Zola being like a simpering little puppy who desperately craves praise (who's a good boy? _Youse_ a good boy!). Also, it didn't really occur to me until I started playing 'Birthright' for the umpteenth time to get this script, but _lots_ of Hoshidans try to kill you. I'm not even talking about the Mokushuujin, I mean named characters. On Classic, Rinkah and Kaze _can_ kill you, and that's the first thing on Saizou's mind. Not to mention Oboro... And then you just let bygones be bygones and end up being best friends! I might exaggerate a little on these things, but _only_ a little, man...


	7. A Song of Birthrights and Love

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Ch.7- “A Song of Birthrights and Love”

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The demesne of Nestra was everything Nerr imagined when she dreamed of seeing Nohr for all these years. Gently sloping hills and wide valleys tucked between steep mountains, every inch of fertile land filled with orchards and groves. And though winter was beginning to spread it's tendrils throughout Nohr, so far south, the weather remained mild, flowers continuing to dot the landscape, visited by thirsty bees as desperate to stock up before the land froze over as any human. The Nohrian girl felt as if she had died and gone to heaven- indeed, for the first time in weeks, she did not wake up with a blinding migraine, the pain and stiffness in her shoulders even easing slightly. This region, one of the richest and most bountiful in Nohr, was still not enough to impress the Hoshidans, however.

 

One night, they had taken refuge in an inn, deciding that they were too far from the open road to set up a camp, and that attempting to do so in the city might attract the attention of border guards, which could then attract the attention of royal soldiers. Honestly, Nerr felt that their attire and attitudes were attracting far more attention than any act of vagrancy could. Their brightly colored silks stood out like an inflammation amidst the subdued, dark palette Nohrians were accustomed to. As they sat down to dine, paying extra for a warm meal, the quartet of natives began eating with gusto the moment their food was set before them. As much as she savored the taste of deeply smoked meat and cabbage, the moment it touched her tongue, she felt herself growing nauseous. Nerr tamped the feeling down, convincing herself that it was because she had gotten used to eating nothing but tofu (that was what those horrible, tasteless cubes were called) and rice, and she had forgotten what real food tasted like. Takumi stabbed at the contents of his bowl with a fork, distaste etched on his face.

 

“This is _it?_ Considering how much we paid, I thought we'd get more...”

“This is a Nohrian establishment.” Hinoka muttered under her breath, looking just as upset. “Is it really any wonder they'd stiff us?” Oboro lifted her bowl to her nose, sniffing tentatively, before pushing it away with a cry of disgust.

“Ugh! I'm not eating this slop- it's sour!” Clutching her own fork so tightly, she could feel the metal start to bend, Nerr focused a hard stare at the lancer.

 

“It's _sauerkraut._ It's _supposed_ to smell like that.” The royal retainer crossed her arms over her chest, looking away from both the princess and her meal.

“Just because it's _supposed_ to smell like that doesn't mean it _should_. I wouldn't give this to a dog.”

“Same here...” Takumi muttered, pushing his bowl away as well. From beside her, Silas scoffed.

“If I weren't looking directly at this, I wouldn't believe it. I thought Hoshidans had some kind of religious belief about not wasting things.”

 

“This is taking it too far.” Tsubaki had tried an experimental bite, and was currently spitting it back into his napkin, taking great care to fold it back neatly. “What's the point of eating spoiled food if it's going to make you sick?”

“It's not spoiled!” A chorus of voices shouted at him in tandem. Nerr felt her headache coming back. There were people in Nohr who would kill- literally murder a person- to have such a meal before them. She remembered those horrible times in the late winter when the citadel's provisions inevitably ran out... Suppressing a shudder, she began eating again, not wanting her food to get cold. If it wasn't good enough for them, then they could just go hungry. She honestly doubted any of these Hoshidans knew what hunger actually felt like. To her surprise, Azura was eating, though it was more of a timid nibble.

 

“You're not complaining?” She asked, genuinely curious. The blunette woman looked like she had a delicate palate.

“I don't want to appear rude.” Azura set her fork down. “Besides, I've eaten food like this before, so it's not entirely foreign to me. Personally, I'd prefer bakalar.”

“G-given that we're still near the coast, it wouldn't be that hard to buy some.” Zola surprised everyone by speaking up, though he quickly sank down in his seat when people's gazes turned towards him.

“Is that so? And, pray tell, how would you know that?” Nerr was the only person he didn't visibly flinch from when spoken to, so he turned his gaze slightly towards her.

 

“I, um... I used to live in Nestra. Taillade- that's my home town. It's a fishing village, and they export most of the seafood to the rest of Nohr, so... yeah. That's how.” The princess leaned back, digesting that tidbit of information. Honestly, it was difficult to think of Zola having been born or raised anywhere- she always just sort of assumed he'd congealed in a gutter somewhere, like Hans or Iago. Hinoka drummed her fingers against the rough hewn table.

“So... you would know the area, right?”

“W-well, to an extent--”

“Good. Then you can tell us the quickest way to get to Chevalier.” The dark mage shrank down even more.

 

“Oh. Uhm... Well, I guess that would be going inland, through Cyrkensia. There's a road there that leads straight to Chevalier...” Takumi scoffed loudly.

“And why the hell didn't you think to tell us that earlier? We could've saved time taking that route instead of skirting the coast!”

“Well, Lord Takumi, I didn't tell you because I thought you all might enjoy living a little longer.” The sarcasm dripping from his voice was tangible. Sakura flinched a bit at the implied threat.

“Wh-what do you mean?”

 

“Cyrkensia's the largest city in Nestra, not to mention the most crowded. It's also always overflowing with soldiers. You know, because it's King Garon's favorite haunt. Oh... did you... _not_ know that?” Nerr definitely knew that the king _used to_ frequent the theaters and opera houses of the arts capital of Nohr, but as far as she knew, Garon had rarely left Windmire in recent years. Unless her siblings just felt it was cruel to tell her about things she had no way of ever experiencing for herself. She inhaled deeply, wondering just how many miles were between their current location and Cyrkensia. Was the king there even now? Surely not, given that he had an invasion to plan, but as Xander had always said, it was impossible to know what went on in his mind.

 

“So, the best course of action is to give Cyrkensia as wide a berth as possible, and stick to our current route.”

“But that'll take forever!” The Hoshidan prince whined. “What if something's happened to Ryouma? We need to get to Chevalier and find him as quickly as possible!”

 

“You're going to have a _really_ hard time finding him when Nohrian soldiers take you prisoner! Just ask Rinkah and Suzukaze- _they'll_ tell you what happens when you get sloppy. And this time, _I_ won't be there to get anybody pardoned.” Hana scoffed.

“We're way more disciplined than Nohrian soldiers. We can deal with anything King Garon could possibly throw at us.”

“I sure as hell won't make the same mistake twice if a Nohrian tries to get the upper hand on me.” Rinkah growled, her ego still bruised from her capture, it seemed. Suzukaze shook his head, looking darkly pensive.

 

“Nerrida-sama has a point- even if we _could_ win a fight against soldiers, a skirmish would not only slow us down, but would also alert King Garon that we're already here. The entire royal family is absent from Hoshido- knowing this could spur him into invading.”

“Finally! Someone with a modicum of sense!” Silas gave the shinobi an approving thumbs up. “Trust me, I was _in_ the Nohrian army- the only reason there hasn't been a full-scale attack so far is because the king is worried about swift retaliation.”

“Which there still would be because our army is still in Hoshido.” Hinoka explained with an air of exasperation. “Yukimura is our chief strategist for a reason, and he's in charge until we get back. Half our forces are lining the border at this very moment. Trust me; there's no way Nohr could invade without suffering heavy casualties.” Azura had been silent the whole time, but softly spoke up.

 

“I believe Cyrkensia would be the least conspicuous route for us to take.” Nerr stared at her, dumbfounded.

“...are you fucking stupid, Azura?”

“No,” The singer snapped. “And unlike you, _I've_ actually been there. It's a neutral region, like Izumo- in fact, it's the one place in Nohr where Hoshidans openly visit. In the entire country, it's the one city where we would be able to blend into the crowd.”

“Well, then. It's decided. Tomorrow, we pack up and head for Cyrkensia.” Takumi said flatly, tossing his fork down and getting to his feet to head upstairs to the beds. The Nohrian princess held her head in her hands, shaking it. Hoshidans toed a dangerous line between “incredibly brave” and “incurably stupid”, and she was not sure which side of said line they were currently standing on. The smartest option for her group at the moment seemed to be following them to the city's gate, then slipping away and skirting the border. A large hand rested on her shoulder, and she looked up to see Jakob giving her a sympathetic look (he quickly removed his hand- impropriety and all that).

 

“Don't worry, milady. No harm will come to you, I swear it on my life.”

“Heh. L-look at the bright side, Lady Nerr; if everything goes to hell, you can just slip over to the soldier's side and start fighting with them. No one would mistake you for a Hoshidan.” Nerr could not tell if Zola's insistence that she looked every bit as Nohrian as she felt made her feel better, or if the realization that it would be incredibly tempting to do just as he said and abandon her birth family made her sad. She set her fork down in her nearly empty bowl, a few shreds of cabbage and pieces of potato all that was left. It would be easier to just pretend she didn't feel anything either way.

000

 

If the coastline of Nestra had been a diamond by the sea, Cyrkensia was a magnificent crown encrusted with every jewel known to man. There was not a single square foot that was not crammed with some wonder or another. Tailors and dressmakers lined the streets by the dozens, as did the studios of painters and sculptors. Perfumers and glovers, pomade studios and spice works were on every corner, and the air was bursting with scent. A baker's dozen of opera houses resided in the town, and countless smaller theaters where a person could see a performance of any kind and broaching any subject. It was a hundred, thousand times better than Gunther had described it to her, and Nerr felt torn between ebullience and sorrow. On one hand, her heart sang in delight at being in this bohemian utopia even though the cacophony of sound and the overwhelming crush of both scents and people were driving her to madness. On the other, the memories it dredged up, of listening, entranced, as her dearest retainer told her everything he had seen and heard amidst the canals, made her soul feel as if it were shattering piece by piece.

 

She could barely hear her Hoshidan siblings talking amongst themselves as they pushed their way through the crowded streets. She could barely hear her own heavy breathing over the whooshing over her blood pulsing through her ears. Even though it was late evening, she could not see the stars, indeed, could not see the sky at all over the golden haze of millions of torches and candles that lit every corner as bright as Hoshido in midday. This place _was_ very similar to Shirasagi; too loud, too crowded, completely overwhelming. Nerr paused, jostled to and fro as people pushed past her, the world spinning in her eyes. She saw the ground rush up to meet her, but didn't even notice she had fallen until a pair of small, delicate hands grabbed her wrists and hauled her back to her feet. Azura's golden eyes blinked like lightning as she looked up at them.

 

“Are you alright, Nerr? Walking on crutches can't be easy with so many people around.”

“You think it'd be easier if I was a dragon?” She asked, half joking. She groaned, falling slightly against the songstress. “I need to sit.”

“We might lose track of the others...”

“Then put me back on the ground and go catch up with them.” She could not help herself snapping, raising a hand to her forehead and wishing her fingers were colder. “I-- I'm sorry, Azura. Just... go. I'll catch up with everyone later. Just go.” To her honest surprise, the singer did not heed her advice and rejoin her family. Instead, she led the Nohrian princess over to a somewhat secluded avenue. Nerr leaned against the nearest building, wincing at the sound of her armor scraping against the brick exterior.

 

“...you don't look so good, Nerr.”

“Trust me, I feel much worse.” She closed her eyes, feeling them sting even as her throat tightened. “Gods, I should not have come here. I wanted to just take Silas and Jakob and Zola, and keep going the long way around... I'm so stupid...” Silence lapsed between them, if one could call it such with all the chattering going on mere feet away. When Azura spoke again, her voice was almost thoughtful.

“Is that because you're worried about running into soldiers, or because you can't wait to be rid of us?”

 

“Both.” Nerr responded earnestly. Those _were_ major contributing reasons, but at the moment, they were the furthest reasons from her mind. “But... it's so much more than that. ...Oh gods, I don't want to be here. It's exactly like he said it was. I _hate_ it...” She could feel tears leaking through her tightly screwed eyelids, could feel them running down her cheeks, and she hated herself for it. 'Conceal it, don't feel it- don't let it show' Xander had always warned her that being a princess meant keeping her emotion in check at all times, but even the slightest reminder of her brother made the tears flow harder. She could only imagine how awkward this was for Azura, watching this mean, intolerable, anti-Hoshidan girl cry like a baby in public. Were Nerr in her place, she would have been slowly backing away, looking for the perfect opportunity to run. But Azura, it seemed, had more guts than that. Even though her voice was a clear indication of just how uncomfortable she was, she spoke up when she could have been plotting her escape.

 

“...it's just like how _who_ said it was? One of the Nohrian princes?” Nerr shook her head, unable to speak. She was biting her lip so hard she could just taste a hint of metal on her tongue- if she opened her mouth, she'd start bawling. “Then who?”

“Nobody.” She gasped. It hurt, as though her heart had been struck with an iron rod, to call Gunther “nobody”, but she could not bear to speak about him, not to a stranger. She had tried to speak to Jakob, weeks ago, while they were still in Hoshido. She'd told him exactly what happened, and waited for his response, waited for him to lament and be just as miserable as she was, but it never came. “Tragic,” he'd said, as if he had just been told it was going to rain that day. She never broached the subject again, and had no intention of doing so. Sniffling, she wiped her eyes on her sleeve, forcing herself to breathe more calmly.

 

“We need to get back to the others.” Azura frowned slightly, her brows furrowed.

“Are you sure? Given how crowded the streets are, I doubt they'll get too far ahead of us. We can stay a moment longer.”

“Why are you acting so nice and thoughtful?” Nerr blurted out, the words past her lips before she could even think about what she was saying.

“...what do you mean?”

 

“You know exactly what I mean. You're being... _nice_ , and it's weird. A few weeks ago- hell, a few _days_ ago, I know you would've left me right where I was, so why are you acting like you care now? Do you think I'm coming around to the thought of being a Hoshidan like you, that I'm rearing to join my strength to your cause and drive those wicked Nohrians back? Because I can assure you I am _not._ ” Azura remained silent for a long time, her face stoic, her eyes unreadable. When she finally spoke, she looked away from the other princess, towards the sickly glow that concealed the sky.

 

“I know. It's plain as day that you've been dying to get back to Nohr. The moment we got off the boat, your whole demeanor changed. I thought by now, you might have bonded a bit with your siblings, but it doesn't look like that's going to happen any time soon. For a while- for a long time, actually- I rather resented you for that fact. It's horrible, knowing how badly they want to get to know you, and watching your relationship stagnate.”

“They could always try coming over and sparking up a conversation with _me_ if they want to get know me so badly.” She snapped mulishly. To her surprise, Azura nodded slightly.

 

“I agree. The day we departed to Nohr, I've been wishing we could be done here so we could go home. To Hoshido. _My_ home. And then I started thinking that, as terrible as I feel in Nohr, you must have felt even worse in Hoshido. After all, I still have the family I grew up with surrounding me. You? You don't have anyone. You're all alone.” She did not mince words, this fragile looking waif. Nerr looked down at her hand, taking a moment to steady her breathing, which was becoming rather erratic. “I know how it feels to be alone. I was alone in Nohr, and for a long time, I was alone in Hoshido. But Mikoto-sama reached out to me- she was the first one there when I was upset or lonely, and even though she wasn't really my family, it helped so much. She would be heartbroken to see you like you are now, so... I think it's the least I can do to try and return that kindness.” So that was it. Just like back in Shirasagi, before the attack, Azura was doing everything out of a sense of loyalty to her mother. Surprisingly, Nerr did not feel resentful about that revelation. The truth was, the reason really didn't matter to her.

 

It had been so, _so_ long since she'd had an even remotely sympathetic shoulder to lean on that she no longer cared even if said sympathy was genuine. She was tired. Three months, it had been just inching on three months since the onset of this ordeal, this “war” that she'd somehow been instrumental in starting, and already she was so tired. Gunther had been a soldier for twenty years before she'd even been born, she recalled mournfully, twenty years of skirmishes and raids and at least one war that had only lasted a year or so before a tremulous ceasefire was arranged. Gods above, how could a person live through that? Maybe death had been a blessing for him- it certainly felt like it would be a blessing for _her_ on days like this... Nerr kept those thoughts locked in her head where they belonged, expending a tremendous effort to raise her head and look at the other princess. Despite identifying as Hoshidan, she was still a princess of Nohr; Xander and Camilla and Leo and Elise's sister... did that make her Nerr's sister, too? She wasn't quite ready to think of the songstress. in familial terms quite yet.

 

“Thank you, Azura. I appreciate it. Truly.” A small smile tugged at the corners of Azura's lips.

“You're welcome, Nerr. Now, I think we really _do_ need to find the others. They'll probably think we ran into soldiers if they turn around and we're not there.” Heaving a sigh, the Nohrian girl adjusted her crutches and pushed herself from the wall. In a place like Cyrkensia that had everything a person could need or want, she wondered if there were any specialist healers residing in town. With every passing day, she grew more desperate to regain the use of her leg. Unable to perform any sort of training exercises, she could feel her skills going to seed. Azura was deliberately walking slowly so she could keep up, which was a good thing because had she been walking much faster as she rounded the next corner, she would have run smack dab into the man turning towards them.

 

“Oh! Sorry about that, I wasn't really-- Heeey! You're humans, right? Are you from Hoshi-- oop. You're not from Hoshido. My bad.” Nerr was so taken aback by this strange conversation started by this even stranger man that it took a while to find her words, but she managed to call out to him before he could walk away.

“ _She's_ from Hoshido.” She pointed as best she could to Azura, who glared at her. It did seem rather foolish to go around announcing that someone was from the enemy country in Nohr, but it was clear that this man was Hoshidan as well. After all, no Nohrian would be caught dead in a... what were they called? Yukata? The short navy robe was loosely tied at his waist, the collar gaping enough to expose a muscular, if not thin, chest. Dark blonde hair aside, he looked like so many other Hoshidan men she'd seen, with his delicate, almost feminine features... until she took note of the large, triangular ears perched atop his head. They twitched slightly, as did the bushy tail that seemed to protrude from the base of his spine. She could not help but stare at it, which was certainly rude, but it seemed the... creature... was too busy staring at Azura to notice. He frowned slightly.

 

“Seriously? _You're_ from Hoshido? You don't look it.”

“I'm not _from_ Hoshido, but I am Hoshidan.” The singer explained as vaguely as possible. The man's ears pressed against his skull for a moment as he seemed to ponder her words, then snapped back up as he smiled.

“Cool beans! My name's Nishiki, and I've been looking for some Hoshidan humans, but you and your friend are the first ones that haven't run off screaming.”

“Uhm...”

“What?”

 

“What's confusing you- the human part or the screaming part?”

“Both, maybe?” Nishiki laughed slightly.

“You know, humans? Like you don't have fuzzy ears or tails? And you don't transform into any other creatures?” Nerr shrugged as best as she could with her crutches.

“Guess I don't know; I'm more manakete than human.”

“Ooooh... What's that?” The Nohrian princess was saved from trying to explain the ancient race she used to read about in history books by a tug on her sleeve. Azura was slowly backing away, her face pallid in the sallow glow.

 

“Azura? What's wrong?”

“Nerr... I think he's a Kitsune...” Her voice was tight with fear, and the other princess had to wonder what was so terrifying about that if Faceless barely startled her. Nishiki nodded enthusiastically.

“Yup! That's exactly what I am. I can turn into a fox! Wanna see?” The man (fox-man, apparently) shuffled through his pockets before pulling out an amber stone, similar to Nerr's dragonstone. Azura yelped in fear, nearly tripping over her own feet in her haste to back away.

“No!! Please, no!!”

“What the hell's got you so spooked?”

“Kitsune are wild beasts!” She hissed, seemingly unaware that one of those “wild beasts” was listening to her very intently. “They butcher and kill any human they come across- they're savages!”

 

“Hey!” Nishiki stepped forward, his ears flattened against his head as his tail bristled in agitation. “I'll have you know that most of those stories humans tell about us are slander, alright? We don't kill anyone who doesn't come into our territory posing a threat. You'd do the same to protect _your_ family and friends, wouldn't you?”

“I would.” Nerr answered honestly. The Kitsune. nodded in approval.

“See? You get it. Man, what's the deal with humans? They shit themselves at the sight of anything different from them...” She turned back towards the blunette singer, who still looked on the verge of having a panic attack.

 

“He seems nice.” Azura slowly straightened, perhaps realizing that she was in no immediate danger.

“Well... Nishiki-san... what are you doing so far from home? I thought Kitsune. didn't leave their territory for any reason...” She dropped her voice to a muttered whisper. “...other than to kill humans...”

“I heard that, human! My ears are better than yours. But to answer your question, I'm here to return a favor to someone. Any time someone's nice to me, I have to be nice in return. One day, I walked out of my hamlet and met some humans. And they were so excellent to me! I had to find a way to repay them, and that led to me meeting _more_ humans, who were also super nice. One favor led to another, and I wound up here without even know how I got here. I don't even know where 'here' is!” For someone very lost and very far from home, he certainly seemed chipper. Nerr found his personality charming (especially for a Hoshidan). Azura also seemed to be warming up to this supposed blood-thirsty killer, though there was still a hint of reservation in her voice.

 

“So... you're lost?”

“Nah, Kitsune. don't _get_ lost.”

“...let me put it another way; do you know how to get home?”

“Nope! But it doesn't matter, I can't go home yet anyway. I owe someone here a _big_ favor- that's why I've been looking for some Hoshidan humans; the Nohrian ones think I'm something called a 'gaar-oo' and keep trying to tell me to go back to the mountains. Can you guys help me?” Azura bit her lip, looking torn.

“We have companions we need to get back to, lest they think something happened to us...”

 

“But I need help...!” Nishiki whined in a very canid manner. His lower lip quivered as he looked upon the princesses. “ _Pleeeease?_ I'll be your best friend forever!” Nerr groaned loudly. She could never bear to see poor, pathetic animals, and with his fuzzy ears and bushy tail, this Kitsune. was just animalistic enough to tug at her heartstrings. She turned towards the singer.

“You go find the others- I'll see what he wants.”

“Nerr! We shouldn't split up- what if either of us runs into soldiers?” She was right.

“Then... we go see what he wants, _then_ go find the others.”

“Actually,” Nishiki had grabbed each of their wrists and was already dragging them forward. She nearly fell at the sudden movement. “What I want is for you to help my friend, and if you two have other human friends, they might be able to help even better! We can go get Layla, then all four of us can find your buddies!”

 

It had taken several minutes for Nishiki to navigate the sprawling alleys and boulevards, finally coming across a young woman in a very revealing white and gold ensemble. She had been sitting on a bench, sniffling and weeping bitterly, and did not stop even when he dragged her to her feet, insisting that he would see her repaid if it was the last thing he did. Needless to say, their entourage was not pleased when the princesses resurfaced, ranting and raving about how worried they'd been. Azura hung her head, looking shamefaced, but Nerr simply informed them that she had taken ill and their sister had stayed with her until she felt better. If they had really been so worried, they could have easily backtracked a bit and found them. Leaving her Hoshidan siblings to their fuming, she turned her attention to this Layla. Her face, which might have been pretty otherwise, was red and sticky with tears, her eyes swollen and bloodshot.

 

“Que pasa? Porque lloras?” She had learned a bit of the southern dialects, but had never had an opportunity to actually put them to use. Sniffling, the woman looked up at her, wiping her eyes, though the tears continued oozing over her fingers.

“Oh... you're Nohrian. I thought-- I thought you were all Hoshidans...”

“It doesn't really matter regardless. How can we help you?” She shook her head, the pale pink hair under her veil brushing over her shoulders.

“I-- I don't think you can...”

“Try me. It's a royal's duty to look after their--” She cut herself off, but it seemed Layla was too busy trying to swallow her sobs to notice.

 

“Well... I-it's my mother... She lives a few miles for here and she's-- she's dying... I need to go and see her right away, but I can't...”

“Why not?” Takumi asked, his frown not born of anger for once, it seemed, or at least, simply anger at the situation.

“I'm a singer, and I have a performance scheduled for tonight.”

“Well, can't they get someone else to sing your part?” Hinoka asked, sympathy writ on her face. Layla shook her head again.

 

“ _No._ King Garon is going to be there, and he's going to be really mad if I'm not there. He- he's my company's patron, and he expects to see us when he comes to town. But... how can I sing at a time like this?!” She wailed, bursting into wracking sobs again. Nishiki rubbed her back, trying to soothe her. Everyone else was too stunned by this wretched news to spare a thought for the wretched singer. “King Garon is here, in the city? _Now?_ ”

“Isn't this _exactly_ what I warned you all about?” Zola hissed angrily. “But you just wouldn't listen!”

“Shut up, Zola! Now isn't the time for pointing fingers; we need to figure out what we're going to do.” Azura looked pensive as her siblings argued with the mage, her eyes hard as she turned her attention towards Layla.

 

“I believe that we _can_ help. I can perform in your stead.” The Nohrian singer's sobs quieted a bit, a glimmer of hope shining in her eyes.

“Do you-- do you really think that will work?” Nerr did not give the princess a chance to respond.

“Not at all! Azura, are you insane? Do you actually think for two seconds this will work?” Far from realizing the folly of this ill-conceived plan, Azura looked resolutely determined.

 

“Don't you see, Nerr? This is our chance to take the enemy by surprise. We shouldn't waste the opportunity.”

“She's got a point.” Hinoka agreed gravely. “We could sneak into whatever opera house Garon is in, and while he's distracted by Azura's singing, we can capture him. Nohr would have no choice but to negotiate for peace!” Silas laughed aloud, paying no heed to the glares directed at him.

“Do you people all have a death wish? There are going to be soldiers _everywhere_ \- do you really think they won't notice you sneaking past and borrowing their king?”

 

“Also,” Jakob chimed in, his lips turned down in a scowl. “Do you really believe the head of the most powerful army on the planet isn't going to put up a fight? I know you Hoshidans are blissfully ignorant in the ways of the world outside your little bubble, but in Nohr, 'negotiate' means 'send someone's head back in a box of scorpions'. And I can assure you, that's what he's going to do to each and every one of you.” Nerr's temples throbbed fiercely, and she was grateful her comrades made every point she had been intending to make. She looked Azura square in the eye.

 

“Azura. Rushing into things because it's easier is why we're in this predicament to begin with. So instead of running with the first plan that pops into mind, maybe consider _thinking things through a bit_.” She looked at Layla, who seemed quite disheartened upon realizing that aide would not come so easily as she had hoped. “What song are you supposed to sing?”

“Um... we're doing a medley. I'm going to be singing 'Leiden Lied' from 'Ondine's Lament'.” She looked back to the other princess.

“Do you know that song?”

“...I'm afraid not.” Nerr's first instinct was to rage at her, for how could she have lived in Nohr and not known one of it's most famous songs, but she stilled her tongue.

 

“You see? This is the gods' way of saying this is a ridiculous plan. My opinion? Layla, you need to go see your mother, consequences be damned, and if King Garon has anything to say about it, simply tell him the truth. He's a cold man, for certain, but he understands how important family is. As for the rest of us, we need to forget we were ever here and be on our way.”

“So that's your answer? Run away, like cowards?” Takumi's disgusted tone was eating away at her last nerve.

“ _My_ answer is to not run into certain death!”

“Um... I hate to interrupt, but... even if this girl _could_ sing for Layla, can you guys not tell that these two look COMPLETELY different? I mean, I know you don't have sweet fox vision like me, but...” Nishiki trailed off, and Nerr nodded deeply.

 

“Exactly! Another folly of your plan.” Azura did not look as turned off as Nerr was hoping she would by now. In fact, she smiled a bit.

“Nishiki-san, we have a mage traveling with us who can make me look _exactly_ like Layla. Your decision to accept Zola is looking quite sage now, Nerr.” _'_ _'_ _Because Nohrians only deserve to live when they serve a purpose, right...?'_ She had to physically bite her tongue to keep those thoughts in her mind. Zola shook his head, backing away only to be blocked from escape by Hinata and Tsubaki.

 

“Wait. Wait. ...wait. What do you want _me_ to do?”

“Exactly as I said- use whatever dark illusions you did to disguise yourself as Izana to make me look like Layla. I know it's dangerous, but this is out best chance to end the war before the casualties start climbing.”

“Um... I don't know... King Garon would _definitely_ kill me if he found out I had anything to do with this...” Hinoka stepped forward, her weapon drawn.

“That's too bad, because _we'll_ definitely kill you if you _don't_ do it. You're supposed to be on our side now. Don't you see we're trying to end this war peacefully, you little creep?” Nerr ignored the threats, unable to tear her attention away from the source of all this madness.

 

“Azura... I'm sure I already know, but what song were you planning on singing since you don't know the song you _should_ be singing?”

“You know exactly which song, Nerr.” The Nohrian girl nodded, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Right, right... You _know_ the orchestra that's playing won't be playing THAT, right? So even if you manage to sing your song while a different song is playing in the background- no easy feat, believe you me- the second everyone realizes you don't know the lyrics to one of Nohr's most famous songs, the jig is up. You'll be a pin cushion before you reach the refrain.” She looked over at the Hoshidan royals, a pleading expression on her face. “For the love of the gods, _please_ tell her this is a stupid idea that's going to get her killed! You don't understand how paranoid Father is!” The word slipped from her tongue before she even realized it, but at once, a deathly quiet fell over the others. Sakura looked up at her, hurt.

 

“Y-you... you called King Garon 'Father'...” Hinoka could only shake her head in stunned disbelief, while Takumi physically recoiled from her.

“...that's what this is all about, isn't it? You still think of that monster, that _disease,_ as your real father.”

“No! That's _not_ what this is about--”

“You're not even denying it! What the hell is it going to take for you to realize you're not one of them, you never _were_ one of them, and you'll never _be_ one of them?!” Nerr fell silent, unable to muster up the will power to argue the point any more. The eldest princess inhaled deeply.

 

“This is the best plan we've got. We're going through with it. Layla, right? Where are you supposed to be performing?”

“Um... the Grand Palais du O'pra. You can't miss it; it's the largest opera house in Nestra. Oh... Are you really sure about all this? If you fail, King Garon is going to be really mad...”

“Don't worry about it.” Azura smiled at her reassuringly, though it did not reach her eyes. “Just go see your mother while you still can. And thank you for providing us with this opportunity.” Layla seemed hesitant, but it was clear familial duty outweighed everything else. She nodded and turned on her heel, smiling for the first time since they had met her.

 

“All right. Gods bless you all for this. And good luck!” She ran, melting into the crowd. Nerr watched her go, feeling as if she had just seen her last chance of escaping this place in one piece flee right along with the singer. Everything seemed to grow dim for a moment, and it took a while for her to realize Zola was speaking, under great duress by the sound of it.

“--Lady Azura as Layla. However, you must understand that my spell won't change her voice; I was practicing my Izana impression for weeks! I hope you've got some good pipes, Lady Azura... ugh...”

“What is it? What's wrong, Zola?”

 

“Eh... it's just... you know you're going to get killed if you go in there, right? Everything Sir Jakob and Sir Silas and Lady Nerr said was absolutely right. If you just leave now--”

“That's _not_ happening.” Takumi snarled in a low, dangerous voice. The dark mage cried out in fear, shrinking away from him.

“Well, then... maybe it would just be better for Lady Nerr to do it.”

“What?” She could not help herself from questioning him aloud, along with several other people, Azura included.

 

“Well... _you_ actually know the lyrics, do you not?”

“Of course I do.” Zola nodded, as if she were proving his point.

“And I've heard tell that you're a very talented singer.”

“Of course she is; milady's voice can be likened to an angel's.” Ever loyal, Jakob could not pass up the opportunity to sing her praises, even if they damned her. The Nohrian princess chuckled darkly.

 

“Rest assured- Azura is talented enough... at least, with the one song she knows. Besides, I wouldn't begrudge her her moment in the limelight.”

“You know that's not what this is about, Nerr.”

“Truly? Because it feels like it.” She fell silent after that, allowing the Hoshidans to make their own plans. A few months ago, she would've crowed to watch their foolish attempts to take down Nohr crash and burn. Now... she just wanted everything to be done with so she could get some rest.

000

 

The Grand Palais lived up to it's name, with hundreds of windows reflecting the light of hundreds of crystal chandeliers each alight with hundreds of candles. It seemed that the elite of both Nohr and Hoshido packed it's halls, decked out in their finest silks and brocades and glittering jewels. There were already performers on the stage, dancing to the upbeat melody played by the orchestra lower down. The walls were lined with boxes for ticket holders, but there were no floor seats. Instead, the entire auditorium had been flooded, and gondolas crowded it's shimmering surface. Zola had performed quite a miracle, his magic changing Azura's golden eyes to blue and lazuline hair to a soft rose. The shape of her eyes, nose, even lips had changed before their eyes. Her dress remained the same (the mage stated that he hadn't gotten a good enough look at Layla's to change it from memory), but being white and gold, it seemed to pass well enough for the original.

 

Given that they were sneaking into a building packed with soldiers, it was decided that it would be much too suspicious if the entirety of their company snuck in, so only the royals and a small handful of others accompanied Azura. Wearing long robes they'd “borrowed” to cover their Hoshidan garb, the siblings looked like members of the chorus, and donning their traditional Nohrian clothes, Jakob, Silas and Zola all looked like extras. An incredibly awkward moment had arisen when one of the performers mistook not only Layla nee-Azura, but also Nerr, as cast members and tried to usher them both onto stage. They had to assure him that they would be there shortly to get away. The backstage area was filled with props, and proved a tight squeeze, but it was the only way they could keep an eye on the songstress. in case (when, most assuredly _when_ ) things went wrong. Azura turned as much as she could to face Nerr. It was strange to look into those doleful blue eyes knowing that a sharp gilt lay beneath their surface.

 

“Do you really know this song that 'Layla' is supposed to sing?”

“Everyone in Nohr does, Azura. That's why I'm trying to convince you not to do this.”

“I have to, Nerr. I want... I _need_ there to be peace.” Clearly, there was no arguing with her. Had this not been suicidally foolish, she would've even been impressed. “...maybe you could teach me the lyrics? I tend to pick up songs quickly.” It had been a long time, a very long time, since Nerr had even hummed anything in front of another person, and with so many people so close to her, she could feel her throat squeeze shut, but she needed to impress upon this stupid, naïve girl just what she was getting herself into. She took a deep breath- she'd need it.

 

 _“_ _Just as the stars in the sky, the star in this castle I long for is just out of my reach, too- it doesn't matter how loudly I scream and cry; nothing matters now, my voice will never reach you- On the ship that night, my sisters came to see me; offering a silver knife, they looked like ghosts--_ ”

 

“Gods above, _stop_.” Takumi hissed, cringing. “My head hurts just listening to that. No human on the planet can sing that fast!”

“I barely understood half of what you just said...” Azura lamented.

“I know- it took me _months_ to learn that song by heart; I _still_ stumble over the lyrics. _That's_ what they're expecting you to sing.” For a moment, it seemed as though it might be dawning on her how futile an endeavor this was, but she shook her head, her expression resolute.

 

“Well, I'm afraid they'll get what they're going to get. Hopefully, we can get to King Garon while everyone's booing me.” She joked weakly. Takumi pushed past her, opening the thick velvet curtain that hid them an inch.

“Speaking of which, where is he? Everyone's taking their places, it looks like they show's starting soon.” Nerr bumped him out of the way, squinting a bit. It was difficult to see past the performers, and gods help them if he was up in one of the boxes-- a familiar face jumped out at her from amidst the gondolas.

 

“He's right there! Front and center!” At first, she was peeved that a keen eyed archer like Takumi couldn't spot something right in front of his face, but it dawned on her that the prince had never seen Nohr's king before. None of the Hoshidan royals, save Ryouma perhaps, would have been able to pick him out of a crowd. He was not wearing his usual, heavy ebony armor, having replaced it with a fine doublet that glimmered with gold and silver thread, an even more sumptuous cloak fastened to his shoulders. A wave of misery washed over her as she looked at him- _this_ was the father she had always dreamed of making proud, the regal king, not the hateful monster who brushed aside everything that stood between him and his goal. She was stopped from running off by Takumi leaning over her to look back out.

 

“Who's that sitting next to him? One of his many concubines?” Next to him? She took a second glance. She had been so overwhelmed seeing him, her father for so long, that she hadn't even noticed another person in the gondola beside him. Given how large he was, it was no wonder she barely noticed the tiny figure huddled amongst the cushions. Wearing a pale pink polonaise, her long, flaxen hair was twined around her head in braids, Elise looked much older than her scant twelve years would suggest, though her heavy expression undoubtedly added to that.

“That's my sister, Elise...” She gripped the curtain tightly, nearly ripping the fabric as she fought every instinct to rush out and pull her little sister into a hug. Elise was never the one who looked sad- she was always bright and cheerful, and made everything around her bright and cheerful as well. The music began, a tiny instrumental swell. Azura swore under her breath.

 

“I think that's my cue.” Pushing past the others, she stepped from the curtains, walking to the center of the stage, every step graceful and measured. Nerr could hear exactly where the music was picking up, she had heard Xander play this same piece for her so many times, she could hear it in her sleep, _Even though I'm destined to fade into foam..._ She held her breath, silently praying against all odds that Azura might have been jerking them around, that she actually _did_ know the song, and just wanted them to be shocked and impressed when she began singing. Alas, prayers more often than not went unanswered. She watched, a frustrated scream tearing at her throat in desperation to get out, as the songstress. slowly raised her hands above her head, singing in a completely different tempo than what the music indicated she should.

 

_“In a white light, a hand reaches through...”_

 

 _'Gods NO, Azura! What are you DOING, you stupid bitch...?!'_ As the songstress. brought her hands down, waving them before her face, tendrils of water streamed from her fingertips, like liquid ribbons. They did not fall to the floor either, remaining suspended in midair as she drew forth more water with each collected movement.

 

_“A double-edged blade cuts your heart in two. Waking dreams fade away; embrace the brand new day...”_

 

If she fought with even half the concentration and discipline she exhibited when she danced, she would be a one-woman army. Certainly, lifting one's leg so high, and spinning so rapidly whilst continuing to sing took years of training.

 

_“Sing with me a song of Birthrights and Love, that light scatters to the sky above...”_

 

Even though people had begun murmuring about the strange performance, it was clear that whatever magic was imbued in the lyrics was taking a hold of them. Nerr could see people swaying in their seats, their expressions dazed. Even Elise's eyes seemed glazed over, her mouth slightly ajar. As Azura twirled, her hair and skirt billowing out around her with dramatic effect, the water from the indoor lake rose, glowing with magic and filling the entire room with an eerie, cold light.

 

_“Dawn breaks through the gloom, white as a bone. Lost in Thoughts, All Alone...”_

 

“They're distracted!” Hinoka whispered, excitement in her voice. The flames of her Amaterasu jumped to life. “Now's our chance, we can--” She was cut off by the sound of people screaming in fear, Azura's voice clear above them. A large ball of fire had exploded right where she had been standing, the impact and heat knocking her back where she hit the ground hard. The drops of water that had been suspended in the air came down, soaking everyone in the sudden deluge. King Garon had gotten to his feet, the glowing runes that surrounded him fading, though their afterimage remained.

 

“I am severely disappointed in whoever thought _this_ trap up... Nerr! I know you hear me, idiot girl. Come out and face me like a woman.” A pair of small, slightly sweaty hands closed over her own, and she looked down at Sakura, her coral-colored eyes wide in fear.

“D-don't do it, nee-sama! It's a trick, h-he'll kill you!”

“I won't tell you again, Nerr.” Garon's growling rasp of a voice was magnified by the extreme acoustics of the auditorium. “Come out and face me, or I'll turn this singer of yours into a pin cushion, just as I did with your dear father.” Her jaw clenched tightly, his mockery making her blood boil. She cast her crutches aside; she refused to be seen as weaker than she was in his eyes. Every step felt as though she would fall, the pain coursing through her right side so much that she wanted to scream, but she pressed her tongue to the roof of her mouth to keep quiet. Azura was just beginning to get back to her feet, her dress seared away in places, crimson lesions that blistered already appearing even though the illusion. The king bared his teeth at her, the closest he could get to a smile, she was sure.

 

“Such a profound limp. Do the Hoshidans not wish to waste their resources on a pawn like you? Don't try to deny it, girl; that's all you are to them. A figurehead, to be used and discarded. Why else would they have dragged you back here instead of leaving you in the castle where you'd be safe? At least _I_ tried to spare you from the truth of what you were; _I_ let you live a happy, peaceful existence, free from burdens and pain. And this is how you repay me- with deceit and betrayal... You ugly, wretched thing.” She let his words bounce off her, sharp and painful, ready to stab into her if she moved an inch, if she showed the slightest weakness.

“Soldiers! Bring her to me.” She had barely even noticed the guards, knights and sentries in full armor surrounding the stage, their weapons drawn. A commotion behind her signaled the rest of their group appearing from the back of the stage, weapons drawn and not looking to go down without a fight. Garon didn't even seemed surprised, though Elise clearly did. She got to her feet, windmilling her arms to keep from falling over into the water. The king reached out to steady her at once, and his youngest child looked up at him with a hurt expression.

 

“Father! Wh-what are they going to do to my Nerr?” She could not stop herself from calling out to her sister.

“Don't worry, Elise. I'll be fine.” Garon's blood red eyes narrowed as he looked from his true child to the impostor he'd “raised” for the last fifteen years. She could not help but wonder, did he feel _anything_ for her? Had he ever?

“How fascinating. Despite your treason and betrayal, you still act as though you care about your sister's feelings? Did you care when you turned your back on her and walked back to those heathens? Did you care when she wailed for you for weeks on end?” It felt as though a knife had been forced through her ribs. Azura stepped forward, still appearing as Layla, and frowning deeply.

“How did you anticipate this, Garon?” The king returned her scowl.

 

“Do not speak to me so blasély, my _daughter_.” The songstress. backed away, eyes wide in surprise. “You take me for a fool, do you not? How those Hoshidans have turned you against me... Did you really think I would not recognize my own wife's favorite song? The song she sang to me more times than I can count? I know those words better than you do, Azura!” Azura shook her head in dismay, and Garon nodded, smiling cruelly, intending to drive the knife in even further.

“Perhaps I might have even thought this was all a horrible coincidence in any other life... but truly Nerr, your stupidity must have _some_ limits. Willingly allowing one of my own men to travel with you, and after he tried to _kill_ you, no less! Your naivety is embarrassing...” She sucked in a gasp, turning to face Zola, only to be met with the acrid wisps of smoke left dissipating after a warp spell. The dark mage had reappeared on a gondola beside the king, cowering behind his arms.

 

“My liege, what are you doing?! _She_ didn't need to know that!”

“No... no! Zola _couldn't_ have been behind this, he was constantly in my sight!”

“He proved his loyalty!” Takumi argued, looking almost as betrayed as Nerr felt. “I'd be dead if it weren't for him.”

“Gods, you're so damn stupid- No wonder Lady Nerr's so trusting; it must be hereditary. I did it so you'd let your guard down, you fool!” His cowering manner fell away, replaced with disgust as he glared at Takumi, hate etched into every line on his face. “You think I would've taken a blow for you if that sniveling healer of yours hadn't been right there? You think I actually _cared_ about your miserable life? I wouldn't piss on you if you were on fire, _Takumi_ , and I'm sure anyone who's spent five minutes in your presence would feel the same way.”

 

“You motherfucker! I'll kill you myself!!” He had already summoned an arrow, and was about to let it loose when the around him froze, so suddenly and sharply, Nerr could feel the chill from where she was standing. Crying out in pain, the Hoshidan prince dropped his arrows, tucking his now frostbitten hands under his arms.

“Uh, how about you _don't_ _?_ ” Zola turned back to his king, lowering his eyes respectfully. “Um... Your Majesty... I've done everything you've asked of me... I pray this will be enough to earn my way back into your good graces so as to _not_ be executed by Prince Leo?” Garon gave a noncommittal grunt. If he had stopped there, perhaps everything would have worked out fine for the mage, but as people were wont to do, he decided to press his luck. “And, erm... your grace...? W-would it... inconvenience you terribly to perhaps... p-pardon Lady Nerr? Th-this isn't her fault, the Hoshidans have practically brainwashed her. The entire time I've been in her company, she's spoken of nothing bu-but returning to Nohr, where she knows she belongs.” Nerr could hardly believe her ears. She would've laughed, only she worried that once she started, she'd never be able to stop again, because the whole situation was too funny.

 

“Are you actually trying to speak on my behalf after _betraying_ _me?!_ ” Zola flinched, looking back at her with earnest eyes (bullshit- every expression he'd ever worn had been a _lie_ ).

“I-I-I never betrayed _you!_ I've been h-helping you! I'm helping you even now, see? Please, King Garon, I b-beg you!”

“This grows tiresome...” The king reached for his belt, where a massive, partially serrated ax hung. It was as long as the king was tall, yet he held it with one hand as though it weighed nothing. Zola paled considerably, falling to his knees as he stared up at the massive axehead, his jaw falling open as his lips trembled.

 

“W-w-wait... b-b-b-bu--”

“But _nothing!_ ” Garon snarled. “You think you have the right to ask me for _anything?!_ Let alone for that traitorous whore's _life!?_ Clearly, she's corrupted _you_ as well.” With the utmost of ease, the Nohrian king brought his ax down on the mage.

 

The massive, ornately embossed blade cut through whatever flesh and bone it met as easily as butter. Zola shuddered violently for a moment, before he split fully in half, blood erupting like a geyser from every severed artery as his lungs and intestines slipped out of the skin that had contained them, into the upholstered boat. Elise shrieked in terror, nearly falling from the boat once more in her haste to escape the gruesome scene. This time, her father's grasp did nothing to calm her as she struggled in his grip, kicking and clawing at him. Her attacks, if they could even be called that, were ineffective, but the king released her nonetheless. Picking up her skirts, the young Nohrian princess leapt onto one of the piers linking the boats together and fled the room, her hysterical sobs lingering long after she vanished from sight, though they were eventually swallowed by the terrified screams of the other opera goers. Those who had not taken the opportunity to flee the moment Hoshidans arrived, those who had watched the scene unfold with a macabre curiosity, now shrieked in horror as they too scrambled to escape, lest they be the next victim of the king's wrath. Nerr wished she could join them. She wished she too could run away. But she could not move, pain and disbelief both rooting her to the ground. She could barely see, the world a blur of colors as hot water dripped from her eyes. Garon's voice, cold and heartless, barely cut through her sorrow.

 

“Still you pity a... _creature_... such as that! After he admitted to betraying you, you waste tears for his corpse! You stupid chit, _this_ is the source of your weakness. _This_ is why you could never be a true Nohrian!”

“I'm not like you...” She whispered brokenly, unable to raise her voice any higher, tears choking her throat. It took all her strength to not cover her leaking eyes with her hands like a frightened child. “I'm not a monster...” Takumi had picked his bow, though it was clear every movement hurt.

 

“I'll show you weakness... Just come a little closer, you fiend...!”

“Takumi, no!” The illusion disguising Azura's true identity had faded away, now that the one maintaining it was dead. “We can't make a stand here- there are too many of them. We need to escape and regroup!”

“Azura!” Garon's voice was hard as usual, but held an undertone of urgency. “Do _not_ make Nerr's mistake, do not return to those savages! You are finally home where you belong. Your mother would not want you to live your life in peril... Come back, daughter. I will protect you...” He stretched his hand out to the songstress, something darkening his eyes... perhaps grief. Azura took one look at him, flecked with blood, still holding his weapon in the other hand... and spat at him, her eyes filling with hatred.

 

“My mother would be rolling over in her grave if she saw the monster you've become. I am not your daughter; you are _nothing_ to me, you bastard. I hope you rot in hell!” The king's eye widened, and for a moment he looked stunned, even hurt, as her words washed over him... but it was quickly engulfed by the all-consuming rage burning over him.

“After years of being the Hoshidan's plaything, suddenly my love isn't _good enough_ for you? So be it. You can die right along with them, then.” Arcane runes glowed in the air around him, but by this time, everyone had realized what that signified, and was already running back towards the far end of the stage. Nerr, with her injured foot, could barely walk, much less run, but she felt a pair of strong arms encased in metal slip behind her back and under her knees, lifting her up. Silas grinned cheekily at her.

 

“Need a lift?”

“I'm too heavy for you!”

“Nah, this is literally the moment I've been training for all my life; I finally get to save you like a dashing knight in shining armor!” She was glad his voice sounded upbeat and happy, even though his eyes showed he was clearly as distraught by recent events as she was. She needed to pretend for a moment. Pretend the world wasn't going to hell, pretend everything _wasn't_ going horribly wrong... it was nice to just pretend they were children playing at being knights. As they ran down the stairs leading to the back of the theater, they could hear the deafening clang of plate mail as soldiers ran after them, trying to find them or at least, cut them off.

 

“It sounds like they're sending reinforcements...”

“Indeed.” Nerr's heart stopped at the sound of the calm enragement of Xander's voice. Everyone had stopped in their tracks, perhaps intrinsically realizing that the stone faced man at the bottom of the stairs blocking their path was no mere soldier they could barrel over. The crown prince's violet eyes were dark with hatred, and they pierced through her as easily as any sword. “So... it's come to this. You dare stage an attack against out king... the same man you once called 'Father'.”

 

“Xander...”

“And in a public place! Full of innocent bystanders! Tell me, Nerr, if your little plan had succeeded, how many civilian casualties would there have been before you secured a victory? Or would that simply have been the price to pay to achieve 'peace'?”

“Perhaps you should ask your king that same question before posing it to your sister, milord!” Silas shouted down angrily at the prince. “Nerr told me about the attack King Garon issued against the Hoshidans, and I know she told you as well. You stand there and decry someone for doing the exact same thing as you... or are such actions only considered atrocities when _you're_ the one suffering?”

 

“Your words mean nothing, traitor.” Despite his stone-faced exterior, Nerr could see the turmoil brewing behind his eyes. There it was again, a chink in his armor. This was what she needed, she just needed to make him hear what she had to say...

“Xander, please; stop being a drama queen and listen--”

“I will _not._ ” He spat, defenses up once again, his anger, his disappointment tempering his obstinance. “You accompany the enemy into our home. You put your people in danger, dragging Hoshidans to their doorstep. You have betrayed your family in the most egregious of ways, and as such, deserve a traitor's death. I have had time to think on your actions, and they remain unjustifiable- you refuse to trust us, yet have the gall to condemn us for not trusting you. No... Draw your sword, Nerr, and we'll settle this once and for all. Death is too kind a fate for all the pain you've caused us.” For a moment, neither of them made any moment.

 

“...I can't walk. You'll have to come up here and kill me, then.” Her cold flippancy only served to make him more irate.

“No excuses! I've seen you crawl with two broken legs to get what you want!” His anger was eating away at his princely facade, something she had never witnessed before. It was terrifying. “Go on, coward! If you would oppose us, then kill your brother with your own two hands! Destroy the very friends and soldiers who once protected you! I'm sure you'll have no qualms about running Leo or Elise through, seeing as you care nothing for them! If Sir Gunther could see you now, even _he_ would be ashamed...” And just like that, every emotion that had coalesced inside her ignited into white hot rage. The nerve of him, _daring_ to invoke the name of her beloved to shame her. After he had brushed off the other man's death as though nothing of value had been lost. Her skin felt overly hot as she struggled to free herself from Silas' grip. She landed on the stairs hard, agony surging through her leg, but even the pain only served to further fuel her rage. Her vision was fading back to silver, crimson bleeding around her periphery and blurring everything together.

 

“Don't you _dare_ speak his name while you protect his murderer! I may have called King Garon 'Father', but the man who raised me is _dead_ because of him!!” Her words sounded muffled, and it felt like her teeth were liquefying and re-hardening into a singular tooth. “I would gladly return home, Xander, but not until that feculent skamelar pays for all the pain he's caused me. I'll have my pound of fl _e_ _sh if I have to go THROUGH you to get it!!”_ The first time she had transformed, both partially and fully, she had been overwhelmed with a potent cocktail of grief and rage, and that was exactly the combination of emotions she felt at the moment.

 

She could feel the flesh of her leg stretch and distend, parts of the skin tanning into a thick hide while others twisted into metallic scales that wrapped around her. The bones remaining in her foot reformed themselves into a spear-like protrusion, and unnatural though it was, it no longer hurt for her to put her weight on it. She didn't even attempt to draw her weapon as she charged at her brother- her whole body was a weapon, waiting to be unsheathed. She could destroy anything if given half a chance- the only thing that stopped her, she realized, was that she did not want to. In her heart of hearts, she did not want to be a killer. But the voice, quiet but soothing, in the back of her head told her that, yes; she actually did. She wanted to rip this horrible man to pieces until he couldn't say anything else hurtful to her. A blast of cold air brushed against her horn, deeply nicking the curved protrusion before it hit Xander square in the chest. It knocked him back with a grunt of pain, and Takumi ran past her, grabbing the wrist that had not grown ten times larger.

 

“Are you crazy?! We need to run!” She could've fought him, pulled away, gone back to her quarry like the voice in her head was telling her she should. She'd feel better then, if she broke something. Burned something. Destroyed something. That would ease the pain in her head, her heart. Nerr shook her head, feeling her jaw shrink as color started bleeding back into the gray of her vision. She prayed that Xander would not take his anger at her out on anyone else, but she could hardly turn to see behind her, much less change direction and run back.

000

 

They had met the rest of the group further north, in a relatively deserted part of town. Given that it was the tanning district, that was hardly surprising. Water flowed through the streets ceaselessly here, foul and bloody, a putrid pink froth. The stench of decomposing meat scraped off rotting hides, reeking tanning fluids and caustic lyes would be enough to drive anyone but the nose dead away. If there were a fresh, steaming pile of manure nearby, Nerr would have gladly shoved her face into it to avoid inhaling the nauseating fetor. How could something that felt so lovely smell so damn terrible? She opened her mouth to speak, but ended up retching instead, unable to stop the half digested food and bile rushing up her throat. It splattered across the slick paving stones, mixing with the vile stew of putrefaction already running over her bare feet. Takumi groaned in disgust and pulled away from her, sounding as if he were close to vomiting himself.

 

“Ugh, I... I think we're safe here...”

“You're mistaken.” Nerr looked up for a moment, but another retch distracted her once more. By this time, she was simply dry heaving, but she couldn't stop. To her surprise, Xander was not driving his sword through her back. He wasn't even lecturing her. In fact, he waited patiently until she stopped gagging, wiping her mouth on her sleeve.

 

“...you can't escape from me, Nerr.”

“Oh gods, Xander...”

“You've gotten stronger, little princess. But not strong enough. You have betrayed not only your king and country, but your people, your whole family. To think... I once called you 'sister' and loved you with all my heart...”

“The only reason you got attached to her in the first place was because that anyan coward you call a father kidnapped her!” Hinoka raged, leveling her Amaterasu with Xander's throat. “This isn't Nerrida's fault; blame _him!_ ”

 

“Silence, you byak slattern. This does not concern you. Draw your damned sword, Nerr. I will end this now.” Her hand went to the Yato's grip on pure instinct alone- it was so much like all those times she had trained with Xander back at the citadel... only it was nothing like that. It had been a long time since she'd actually even _held_ her sword; he would be so disappointed if he knew. Fortunately for her, the crown prince did not have a chance to see what her stance had degraded into. A pastel blur of pink and blonde ran between them, further churning the fetid water that flowed at their feet. Elise gasped for air, her face flushed and damp with both sweat and tears, but her round, violet eyes were hard.

 

“X-Xander! Nerr...! Please, st-stop what you're--” She broke off in a hacking cough, clearly not used to such physical demands. “--stop what you're doing!”

“Elise! What are you doing out here, it's not safe!” A young girl running through the city all alone; where were her retainers? Xander seemed far less concerned with his little sister's safety, and more concerned about losing face in her eyes.

“Return to Father, Elise. You don't need to bear witness to this.”

“No!” The Nohrian princess glared at her brother, standing at her full height (which was barely enough to reach his chest) and moving directly in front of him, her arms outstretched. “I won't let you hurt Nerr! If you want to fight one of your sisters so badly, then... then fight me...” Her voice wavered towards the end, her courage quickly failing her. It sicked Nerr, to think that her little sister had to stand up for her and fight her battles.

 

“Elise, listen to Xander. You shouldn't be here.” She was tempted to push the blonde girl back in the direction she came, but a thin hand closed around her wrist, dragging her off in the other direction. Azura barely spared the arguing Nohrians a second glance as she ran.

“Quickly. She has him distracted; now's our chance! We have to cut our losses and run. Fighting here puts the innocent people of Nestra at risk.” Xander's words from earlier popped back into her mind, unbidden. There had been so many people in the opera house, so many bystanders between them and the king. They could have easily gotten caught in the cross-hairs, and most assuredly would have if Garon felt that he was in danger of losing. It was funny how Azura didn't seem to care about that _before_ they were outnumbered... As she ran, her brother's voice rose to follow her.

 

“That's right. Run away while you still can. I will _always_ find you, little princess!” As horrible as it was to dwell on, she knew he was right. Xander put his king, his family, and his country above all else, and in one day, she had burned her bridges back to all of them. She would be hounded until one of them were dead, and she already knew in her heart that it would have to be her.

000

 

A/N- So, I've heard that sauerkraut is an acquired taste. I wouldn't know, since I've been eating it since I was a child. I imagine that Hoshidans (especially the upper crust you have in your party) would be pretty repulsed by peasant food- hell, I remember back when nobody knew what polenta was (another dish I grew up with), and acted like they were better than it. (it still weirds me out to realize there are people who've never eaten grits)

And that plan, one of Azura's many, well thought-out plans... To be honest, my first intention was to scrap it and try to come up with something _less_ stupid (Nerr suggested my first AND last suggestion), but the dance sequences are, without a doubt, my favorite scenes in the game (at least, the Japanese versions), so I had to write them. But something that bothers me on both routes is... why is the orchestra playing “Lost in Thoughts”? I mean... that's a -REDACTED- song, how could they possibly know it? And I doubt it was what Layla was originally going to sing. I can even think that maybe they were playing something similar in Conquest, and that's why the tempo is faster, but that pretty rendition in Birthright? That makes no sense; fuck you, Fates plot. One last thing- I like the thought of Garon being a good dad and taking Elise to the opera to get her mind off things, and also, actually noticing and caring about Azura when he sees her again. I like writing Garon as a _good_ dad sometimes.


	8. Solacement

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Ch.8- “Solacement”

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“ _Tell me what to do to make it all feel better...”_

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They did not stop running, not until the clamor of the crowded streets of Cyrkensia was but a memory, and the faintest tendrils of light from the east began diffusing through the inky Nohrian sky. By the time they stopped, many of their company simply could run no further, collapsing to the dusty, parched wasteland in fits of coughing and dry heaves. Nerr was an expert at running, able to run for hours on end at the citadel, but a brisk warm up in the confines of her home in no way compared to running for one's life through the barren scrub and wastes of Nohr. She had not yet reverted from her partial transformation, and while she was now able to use her right leg again, the pointed tip that now stood in place of her foot left her with an uncomfortable, limping trot. Her body felt lopsided, and though her arm did not end in a gaping, tooth-lined maw, it was still longer and larger than her human frame could easily carry. Still, she could deal with these problems later. When her life, and the lives of others, were not immediately on the line. Takumi was resting his hands on his knees, his long ponytail coming loose, ashen hair sticking to his sweat slicked face.

 

“I... I think we really did shake them this time... Oh gods... The Nohrian army is like a pack of bloodhounds!”

“Well, what do you expect?” Nerr flopped onto the ground, her head pulled down. From her shadow, she could see long curling horns protruding from her skull. She wondered what she looked like, then decided she really didn't want to know. “You're in enemy territory during wartime, boy; did you think they'd treat us like tourists? But now, Xander's on our tail. And it won't be long before he's right up our butt, probably with a regiment to boot.”

 

Though, if she allowed herself a moment to think about recent events, the crown prince hadn't seemed all too concerned with stopping the Hoshidans. They had been right there, three fourths of the royal family, just waiting to be picked off. He could have attacked them, could have taken them hostage and used their own plan against them... but he hadn't. He had grandstanded and lectured at her as though they were back home, as though she _weren't_ in cahoots with the enemy... Even before Elise had come to her rescue back in Cyrkensia, he had paid the Hoshidans no mind, calmly waiting for her to finish being sick before he attempted to engage her in battle. If she were a more egotistical person, Nerr might have even believed this had nothing to do with the war at all. That it was all about her, and Xander's personal vendetta would be stopped if she turned around and headed back to meet him. She muttered to herself, the strength leaving her.

 

“I'm going to have to settle things once and for all with Xander to make his stupid ass listen... I can't even imagine how strong I'd have to be just to avoid ending up as a smear on the wall...”

“You're right. I've also got a long way to go.” She had completely forgotten Takumi was standing so close to her, much less still listening to her speak. His words struck of chord of annoyance in her- did he really not realize she was monologuing?

 

“Good lord, does _everything_ have to be a competition with you? I wasn't _talking_ to you. This isn't _about_ you and your weird obsession with being the best, Takumi.” She got back to her feet, brushing the dust from her tights with her one human hand. “I'm thinking aloud, _to myself_ , about straightening things up with my family.”

“We ARE your family!” Before she could blink, she found herself back in the dirt, the younger boy's arm straight out, a loathsome expression marring his youthful features. He had pushed her, shoved her to the ground in his frustration, tried to hurt her. _Listen to me or I'll hurt you..._

 

That had always been Garon's particular brand of “love”. He hadn't been there to physically harm her, but he knew ways to make her suffer. If she didn't keep up with her studies, or if her training wasn't progressing to his exacting standards, he would deprive her of what little comforts she had. No new clothes, no fresh fruit, her siblings would not be allowed to see her until the next month... She still remembered the day, years ago, when Gunther had pushed her away as she moved to embrace him as she always did, telling her that, no, my lady; you can no longer behave in such a manner. She _still_ didn't know what unspeakable crime she had committed against the king to deserve so weighty a punishment... Her brothers and sisters, though, would _never_ do anything to hurt her... She glared up at Takumi, her supposed “brother”. It seemed he just realized what he had done, the anger in his face quickly morphing into the guilt of a little boy who was being called out by his parents. Slowly, Nerr got back to her feet for the second time, not bother to dust herself off this time around. She didn't want her efforts to be in vain. She looked the prince square in the eye; though he was an inch or so taller than her, it seemed that his conscience cowed him.

 

“I mean my _real_ family.” She hissed in a low whisper. “Where is Azura? We need to head out and it wouldn't do for her to get left behind.” Not to mention that, in the horrible mood she was in, Nerr would not have minded the opportunity to gloat a bit just how wrong the singer had been about her plan and how right she was. Takumi looked away from her, a mix of emotions warring across his face, none of them pleasant.

“I saw her a minute ago...” He mumbled, looking around, though pointedly not in the direction of his blood sister. His eyes fixed on a distant point on the horizon. “She's over there, behind that tree.” There were few trees that could survive in the eroded soil of the wastes, but indeed, a faint, pale figure was lurking behind one of the thin, spindly trunks.

 

“Just begging to be picked off by an assassin...” She muttered to herself, before turning back to her... _brother_. “Thanks- _ugh_ \- Takumi.” She made no effort to hide how disgusted she was with him, the flash of pain his his eyes not going unnoticed. She turned on her heel, heading towards the songstress. Her skull was throbbing, as if it would crack open at any moment. For a moment, she wished she was still running- when her legs pumped and her lungs burned and the air was cutting her face, she didn't have room in her mind for anything else. When she was still, the horrors and troubles could spread out, sinking into every nook and cranny of her brain. She groaned, putting on a burst of speed to reach Azura. “Hello, Azura. What are you--”

 

“UNNNGH...” Just before she got to the songstress, the other woman collapsed in a pile of dusty silk and lazuline hair.

“Gods, what's wrong?” She knelt beside the other woman, gripping her shoulder with her one good hand and pushing her back into a sitting position. Her face was ashen, though her cheeks were flushed, as if she were feverish, though her skin was cold and clammy. Her eyes seemed hazy, and it took a long time before she could focus her gaze on Nerr, her breath coming in short, shallow bursts.

 

“Ugh... uhn, Nerr...?”

“Uh... no? Yes, it's me... What's going on- are you hurt?” She looked over the Hoshidan girl, trying to find a wound that could be causing her distress. Through the charred holes in her dress, Nerr could see the angry red burns on her body, the blisters covering them popped and spilling watery pus over the raw, irritated flesh. Maybe one of the burns was becoming infected? They'd had no time to stop and let her be healed, though Hinoka had carried her in the her saddle for most of their trek, so it seemed unlikely that she was too exerted. Azura shook her head slightly, groaning and slumping forward.

 

“N-no... I'm fine. I just... need a moment.”

“You're clearly not fine. Stay here; I'll go get Sakura.”

“No!” Her voice rose, suddenly strong, angry... almost fearful. “I'm fine. You don't need to worry.”

“You're covered in burns.” The Nohrian princess would not let her voice raise. She wasn't such scum that she would yell at someone who was clearly ill. “If you're not already sick, you're going to _get_ sick. Stop being stubborn and go see Sakura.” Hard golden eyes met crimson, neither backing down... Azura blinked first, whimpering slightly and leaning back against the tree. It's bark had been scraped away, probably by hungry animals (or else, hungry people), leaving the trunk smooth.

 

“Urgh... you're right. I-- I'll go see her now.”

“Here, give me your hand.” Nerr stood upright, offering her hand. The singer hesitated for a moment, probably because she was so weak, but placed her hand in the other woman's. She tottered unsteadily as she was pulled back to her feet, and the Nohrian girl reached up with her deformed arm to try and steady her. “Come on. We can't stay here much longer- Xander's probably already on our heels.” Bearing as much of Azura's weight as she could, she slowly brought the other girl back to the others.

000

 

Healed and running on a second wind, the party of Hoshidans and Nohrians continued their journey northwest to Chevalier. They made good progress, but after walking for days, mental and physical exhaustion was beginning to take it's toll. They had to make camp, though there was precious little cover to be found. Snow had already begun falling sporadically, leaving odd piles of dirty snow amidst the baked sand. The managed to find a sparse wooded area, and though the trees were dead and bare, it was better to have something at their backs than nothing at all. As the others quickly set about making camp fires, their thin robes not suitable for Nohrian weather, Nerr wandered away, deeper into the coppice. Her arm was slowly returning to normal, back to it's normal size if nothing else, but the skin was still a leathery navy.

 

She'd never been able to see herself as dragon before, mostly because there was hardly time to preen before a mirror in the heat of battle, but also because color was drained from her world at those times. This was the first time she'd ever seen draconic flesh up close before. It looked like fine grain leather, glistening slightly in the weak light of midday. Her dragon skin was always damp and slick, she'd noticed, as if she were sweating profusely- if she stood still long enough, puddles would form under her still transformed leg. She had never thought it was possible for dragons to sweat before, but it seemed she learned something new every day. The thick scales that covered most of the flesh did not overlap like those of Camilla's revenant wyvern, or even those of ancient dragons she'd seen in pictures; they locked together in a manner similar to her armor. Speaking of which, Nerr looked down at her battered cuirass distastefully. Several plates were missing, exposing her blouse beneath, and there was a large gash shorn into the silvery steel just below her collar bone. Rinkah, of all people, had attempted to fix it for her, her tribe's natural ability to heat objects making them some of the most renowned blacksmiths in Hoshido. And while she was grateful for the oni's efforts, it was clear that her armor was a lost cause. It might serve her for one more battle before it started doing more harm than good.

 

The princess ran a thick claw over the dingy surface of the metal, digging a large scratch into it without even meaning to. It had never gotten so dirty before. Back in the citadel, Jakob used to polish it after every training session, hammering out the dents and oiling the leather straps that held it together to the point that ever day, it appeared freshly smithed. She remembered when she had first gotten it, four years ago. Until then, she'd been using old, mismatched scraps of armor dug out from the various corners of the Citadel, left behind by the soldiers who used to reside there when it still served as a prison. A cuirass that was too large for her then slender frame, pauldrons that were too small. When Camilla had taken her measurements, she'd simply assumed it was for another dress- not that she got much use of the ones she had. Her heart had leapt into her throat weeks later as her siblings presented her with the sleek suit of silver and ebony plate, tailored to fit her like a glove. Xander had beamed at her when she tried it on, testing her range of motions. When she grew strong enough, when she was worthy of being a Nohrian knight, they would get her another suit of armor, black and gold and embossed with the royal crest just as they wore. That dream had been like a sunrise, constantly peeking just over the horizon. Now... it was forever out of her reach.

 

“Nerr? What are you doing out here?” The princess started turning around to face Silas, who was looking at her with a concerned expression. His brows furrowed. “Why are you crying?” Sniffling, Nerr reached up to wipe her eyes with her sleeve- she hadn't even realized what was happening.

“Oh. I'm not. I think I sweat a lot as a dragon.” The cavalier shook his head slowly.

“Dragons... don't sweat.”

“Oh yeah? Then what do you call _this?”_ She thrust her draconic arm in his face, so he could see the water beading across her skin and running down her fingers in rivulets. His lips twisted in distaste.

 

“I don't know what the actual word for it is, but I call it gross. Don't get your weird, dragon sweat on me!” Despite the weight in her heart, Nerr could not help but laugh slightly, lowering her arm. Silas smiled a bit as well, though his eyes were still dark. “Seriously, you shouldn't be so far from camp. What if you run into an assassin? Now that King Garon knows you're in Nohr, he might send someone to kill you.”

“You know this hand turns into another mouth that shoots round shot made of boiling water, right? I think I'll be okay.”

“...Gods, what _are_ you?”

 

“I don't know.” She answered honestly, tilting her head back and looking through the spindly branches to the sky. Violet and pink clouds streaked the indigo canvas, pinpricks of light just barely visible. The sky above the citadel rarely had such colors. “Remember when we were kids and we used to play knights and dragons?” Silas laughed easily, some of the tension easing from his brow.

“I remember that you always used to side _with_ the dragons. ...maybe this is why. Maybe you always kind of knew deep down that you were a dragon, and that's why you never stayed a knight very long...” Nerr huffed slightly, reaching up to brush a loose piece of hair behind her ear. She flinched as her fingers skimmed the cold, brass surface of her hairpin.

 

“...when I did weapons training, I used to burn my hands on the wyrmslayer. But I kept going back, trying to wield it, until I got a rash so bad my hands swelled up... If I knew I were a dragon, do you really think I would be so stupid?”

“Yes.” Her friend answered easily, not a hint of mockery or amusement in his voice. “From what I know about you, you would. Even now, if someone told you not to pick up a wyrmslayer, you'd run and do it anyway if you thought you needed to. You've always been stubborn, Nerr... Stubborn and pure... I always admired your hopefulness.” She looked back down and realized he was staring at her with such intensity, it seemed he was trying to burn her with his gaze.

“I heard about what you did back in Castle Krakenburg, how you defied the king to spare the Hoshidan prisoners. The same prisoners that kidnapped you and took you to Hoshido, the same prisoners you're fighting beside even now.” He looked away from her, back towards the camp, and she was grateful that it felt like she could breathe again. “Not many people would be willing to take a chance with people after something like that, much less trust anyone else. But you still do- you even trusted Zola after he--”

 

“Don't!” She brought her hands up, covering her ears, the pointed cartilage poking out between her fingers. “Don't... don't mention him to me...” She didn't want to think about that, about the bleeding, twitching mass of quivering flesh she'd seen, terror still on his face after he'd ceased feeling anything. Indeed, it seemed to be a curse; every time she tried to show mercy, rather than accept her kindness, those horrid people turned around and stabbed her in the back right to her face. It hurt her heart thinking about it. Silas seemed to understand that he was poking at an open wound, and quickly changed the subject, wrapping an arm around her shoulder. Nerr leaned into his embrace, suddenly very aware of how cold it was.

 

“Hey. I know everything looks like it's going to hell right now, but it's going to get better. The war, the fighting, your brother being mad at you... those things won't last forever. When this is all over, why don't we take a little trip together sometime.” Slowly lowering her hands from her ears (not that it did much to muffle any sounds), the princess looked over to the knight. A thousand thoughts ran through her mind- she considered telling him that it wasn't going to end, it _could_ last forever and probably would, that by the time anything ended, she'd probably be _dead_ , either by Garon's hand or her own misery... Instead, all that came out was a simple query.

 

“Where would we go?”

“Someplace you always wanted to see. When we were little, you used to tell me all the time about all the things you wanted to see and experience. You probably don't remember all the places on your old list, but I do. Oh, I know! There's not much to do now in winter, but come spring, we should go to Glasse. Every flower you can imagine grows there, and almost all of them will be in bloom. They supply wholesale fragrances to pretty much every perfumer in Nohr for a reason. And there will be bees and butterflies everywhere, so that'll cross two things off your list.” Winter was only just beginning. Spring was months away, a life time. It felt foolish, to make plans for another life, but she forced her lips to curl upwards regardless.

 

“That sounds like fun. I would really like that, Silas. Thank you.” Her old friend beamed at her, giving her shoulder one more, reassuring squeeze before heading back to camp, reminding her that she needed to hurry back as well. Though Nerr agreed and assured him she would return momentarily, once he vanished from the trees, she mad no effort to move. She was cold, her feet burned from the frozen ground, but she could not find the willpower to move. She did not want to join the group. She wanted to be alone for a while. The ground in front of her feet glowed brightly with a prismatic light, symbols of a long dead tongue flashing in the air for a moment. The princess knew a spell when she saw one, but it had already been cast, there was no time to get out of the way. A flash of light going off before her eyes blinded her, and she stumbled back a bit, rubbing at them to try and ease the white and red star bursts exploding behind her lids.

 

<<Oh! Sorry about that, Lady Nerr. I forgot that's kind of blinding from the other side...>> The voice echoing in her mind was one she hadn't heard in months, but one she would recognize anywhere.

“Lilith!” She beamed at the minuscule form of her former equerry hovering before her. Though the other girl's draconic face did not emote, warmth and joy shone in her large, golden eyes. “Gods above, it's been so long. Too long.”

<<I know, milady. I'm sorry.>> Her voice, even as just a thought, seemed remorseful. <<Would that I could accompany you every step of the way on so harrowing a journey, but I'm afraid in this form, I'm very weak outside the Astral realms. It wouldn't be an exaggeration to say a stiff breeze could knock me unconscious...>> Nerr gasped in fear. How was that possible? When she was a dragon, she felt stronger than ever. A thought suddenly occurred to her, and she fished her dragonstone from her breastplate.

 

“Maybe you can turn back! I have a dragonstone--”

<<I'm afraid it doesn't work like that, milady. That stone already contains your powers, though... not well, it seems...>> Lilith's sharp eyes slowly took in her mistress's misshapen form, from the points of horns that had not yet fully retracted into her skull, to the scales plating her skin. <<You need to relax and calm your mind, Lady Nerr. _This_... this should not be- you should not be able to remain in such a state for so long. It's unnatural. >>

“But... I can't stop it. If I go back to being fully human, I won't be able to walk, and Xander is chasing us, and--”

 

<<You need to put those thoughts from your mind. Believe me, Lady Nerr; I've been a dragon longer than you. This is my true form. Staying like that for too long won't just harm your body- it will harm your mind, and _those_ scars are much more invasive. >> Nerr leaned back against one of the trees, her head pounding in time to her pulse as her stomach churned. Calm down, relax; that was so much easier said than done. Still, she was grateful to have someone to speak to about these things; being a dragon was terrifying on one's own, and Lilith's voice acted like a balm in her mind. But it also raised the question how she even knew the princess had been in this state for longer than what was consider normal.

 

“Lilith... how did you even know what's going on with me?” The small dragon looked away, her long tail flicking in the manner of an irritable cat. If she had visible ears, they'd surely be pressed flat against her skull like Nishiki's often did.

<<I... have been watching you, milady. I cannot do much to aid you, but, if your life were ever in danger again, at least I would know and perhaps be able to pull you back to safety.>>

“And... is my life in danger now?”

<<No. ...it just looked like you could use a friend.>> At once, Nerr's eyes welled up, tears stinging them as they clogged her throat. Homesickness surged through her, and she wrapped her arms around the tiny dragon, taking care not to squeeze too tightly or bend the large blue and white fin at her back. <<I wish I had arms so I could hug you back, milady...>> She could hear the tears in the other girl's voice, and squeezed tighter for both of them.

 

“This is more than enough.” They stayed like that, half embracing, for a long time. Perhaps too long considering what Lilith had told her about staying out of the astral realms, but she could bring herself to let go just yet. Unlike wyverns, the astral dragon was warm to the touch, her mottled scales fine and soft. If Nerr closed her eyes she could forget where she was for a second, pretend she was back home, visiting the stables after training...

“EEEEK!” Her eyes snapped open and she whipped her head around, looking for the threat, feeling her arm grow larger in response to this unseen threat, fingers splitting into teeth. Whatever it was, she'd rip it apart.

 

<<Lady Nerr, calm down! Nothing is wrong!>>

“What was that scream, then?!” Her question was answered by the sight of two women in white, the smaller one cowering behind the larger.

“N-n-nee-sama, what _is_ that thing?!”

“I don't know, but there's no need to be afraid, Sakura. I'll protect you.” Nerr sighed deeply, feeling the muscles and bones in her arms revert back to their normal dimensions, though she noticed her claws were still thicker and harder than usual, more tooth than nail.

 

“Perhaps instead of jumping to conclusions and alerting all of Nohr to our whereabouts, you could simply come over and _ask_ what things are.” Sakura's face flushed until it was difficult to tell where her skin ended and hair began.

“O-oh... I-I-I'm sorry, Nerrida nee-sama...”

“It's fine.” Azura led the way, her sister clinging to her dress as she trailed behind. It was funny that the singer thought she could protect anyone when she wasn't even holding a weapon. Perhaps instead of always reaching for a lance, she should instead learned to fight with a sword or dagger, something her delicate hands could better wield. She stared at the floating dragon, her own golden eyes narrowed in confusion. The Nohrian princess had never thought of it before, but Azura and Lilith both had very similar coloring. They were the only two people she'd ever seen with golden eyes, after all, even amidst all the crowds she'd walked through in her travels... But then again, Camilla and Gunther were the only two people she'd ever seen with lilac hair, and that didn't mean anything.

 

“Nerr... what is this creature?”

<<I don't much appreciate being called _creature_ , missy. I _have_ a name. >> Sakura yelped, covering her ears with her hands.

“I-- I heard a voice in my head! Like when you're a dragon, nee-sama!” Nerr relaxed a bit more.

“Well, maybe that should give you a hint as to what you're looking at. Sakura, Azura, this is my equerry and friend, Lilith. Lilith, my sisters.” The word slipped from her tongue so easily, it came as a shock when she realized what she had said once she finally noticed. Azura noticed as well, her eyes growing wider for a split second before her usual stoic mask was firmly back in place. Sakura either didn't realize anything odd had been said, or else, saw nothing odd about it. She took a another, timid step towards the dragon.

 

“W-wow... I knew there were lots of dr-dragons in Nohr, but I didn't know they were used as anything b-but mounts. D-don't they spook your horses?” Lilith laughed in their minds, a musical peal.

<<Oh, I wasn't always like this, Princess Sakura. I had a human form until a few months ago. I could hardly keep a massive charger in line looking like this.>>

“Size wise, it's not much of a difference.” Nerr smirked slightly, feeling the equerry's eyes narrow at her. Lilith had always been rather touchy about her diminutive size, even in comparison to the other girls in the citadel. Azura frowned slightly.

“Well, where have you been all this time? I've never seen you before.” The dragon turned her attention to the singer, giving her a long stare. Nerr recognized the look in her eyes; she had seen it before, when the girl was human, when she had first appeared at the portcullis of the outer bailey, ragged and weak, asking for work. Gunther had asked how she managed to get there, and the same, tumultuous expression filled her eyes. After a long moment passed, she finally answered.

 

<<I've lived in the astral realm, from whence I come. And I'm afraid I must return there in a moment; I can already feel myself getting weaker...>> Indeed, she seemed to be hovering lower, her mouth opening and closing as if she were having difficulty breathing. The Nohrian girl reached out patting her head lightly.

“Then don't let us keep you. Go back home, Lilith.”

<<I will, milady, but before I do... I have something for you. You may not want it... but I feel you should have it.>> Nerr's heart began thudding in her chest at those cryptic words. She was beginning to fear gifts; they never seemed to bring about anything good these days.

 

“Wh-what is it?”

<<Under my coif, milady.>> Hesitantly, she removed Lilith's bonnet, which she still wore even though she had no hair to cover. Beneath the white linen was a torn scrap of cloth. Replacing the bonnet on the dragon's head, the princess inspected the frayed, dirty rag, her heart beating so fast it felt as if it would explode at any moment. <<I went back to the Chasm, milady. I'm sure you would not have wanted me to, but... I thought a bit of closure might help. Both of us...>> Sakura looked between the draconic girls, confusion writ on her sweet face.

“Wh-what's going on? Nerrida nee-sama? You don't look well. Sh-should I get my rod?”

<<I-I'm sorry, Lady Nerr. I need to return...>> Unable to speak, she simply nodded, barely noticing the blinding flash of light. She could not think, she could not see straight, her vision warping and twisting upon itself until she could hardly tell where she was anymore. Her hands shook violently; no, not just her hands, her whole body, everything burned as misery consumed her.

 

“Nerr! Nerr, are you alright?”

“Wh-what's happening, nee-sama? I'm scared...”

“It'll be fine, Sakura. Maybe you _should_ get your rod.” Azura and Sakura's voices seemed to be coming from very far away, as if she were trapped at the bottom of a well, the scummy, frozen water rising above her head... “Nerr! Can you hear me? Please, answer me.” The Hoshidan princess was speaking to her, but her throat was too tight to respond, too tight to breathe.

 

She sank to the ground with a whimper, her human hand clenched so tightly, she could feel her fingers cramping, torn, ragged nails cutting into her palm, the blood welling up from the gashes soaking into the filthy cloth she held, joining the blood already staining it. It was so dirty, one could just barely make out the embroidery trimming the edge. The stitches were uneven, and some of them did not line up with the rest of the pattern. Clearly the work of an inexperienced beginner attempting something beyond their abilities. But she had worked so hard on it, had been so proud of her efforts... All the pinpricks that left her fingers so tender she could barely lift a spoon had been worth it when she held her masterpiece to the light. She had been six, Camilla had only just begun teaching her the delicate art of embroidery, and even though her sister had drawn out a pattern to practice on, that had been too boring.

 

She'd made her own, a border mimicking the pretty silver embossments she always saw, putting all of Xander's script lessons to good use... that was the corner Lilith had returned to her- she could just make out the calligraphic “G” that she had poured all the patience her childish mind could muster into tracing with silver thread. In later years, she would recall with embarrassment the pride with which she had skipped up to her retainer, presenting him with her handiwork. _“A lady's favo_ _u_ _r,”_ she'd declared, with the type of pure hearted arrogance only children could sincerely muster. _“For her champion knight!”_ Gunther had accepted her petty offering with a deep bow, declaring it was his highest honor to serve so great a lady. When she'd gotten older, she just assumed he'd thrown it away; she'd probably have done the same in his place. But here she held it in her hand, brought back from the Infinite Chasm, his tomb... after more than a decade, he still humored her. A wretched sob tore itself from her throat.

 

“Oh, gods... I wish I were dead...!” She ignored Azura completely, lying on her side on the cold, hard ground and curling into ball, gasping for breath between her sobs. She knew, she had known for months, but having tangible proof in her hands... She felt as if the wound had been carved into her anew. She could feel Azura approach her, then pause. A light hand rubbed her shoulder gently for a moment, then retreated, soft footfalls slowly growing quieter as they walked away from her. The singer had left her alone to mourn in peace, for which she would be eternally grateful. She could not bear another person's company at the moment- she didn't want any to witness her weakness, her shame. There was no shoulder she could cry on- the only people she thought _might_ have cared revealed that clearly, they did not. _Tragic_ , Jakob had intoned, his voice as cold and unfeeling as Xander's had been.

 

She remembered something Azura had mentioned back at the Eternal Stairway weeks ago, about people going unmissed and... Gods above, how could a person be so unmourned?! How could _no one_ care?! Would it be like this when _she_ died? Would they shove her into a shallow hole and toss a few handfuls of dirt on top of her like all those soldiers back at Fort Jinya? Would _anyone_ care that she was missing? It was easy to tell herself that yes, of course they would, she was loved, but... it seemed that people's memories were very short. Out of sight, out of mind... She was a traitor in the eyes of one country and an enemy sympathizer to the other; who would care about someone like that? She covered her face with her hands, ignoring the tears oozing between her fingers, and wept, the sound of her own sobbing enough to drown out those thoughts at least for a while.

 

She needed to stop thinking. Stop feeling. And if there was a merciful god, stop living. But those were the thoughts of a miserable coward, she knew enough to know that. Taking one's life in Nohr was always frowned upon, a coward's way out. Better to live through pain and illness and infirmity than be seen as a coward. Xander's cold, mocking voice echoed in her mind between her whimpers, _If Sir Gunther could see you now, even_ _he would be ashamed..._ She dug her fingers into her scalp, feeling the razor sharp points of her horns begin to puncture her palms as they sliced through the thin skin covering her skull, trying to grow back to their full length once more. _'Oh, gods damn you, Xander... You and your father... I hope you rot in a pit of eternal torment for protecting that coward...'_

000

 

A/N- Short chapter is short, but I wanted to get this out of the way before we got to Chevalier. I love Silas; he's shaped like a friend, and it's nice for Nerr to have someone who's just a nice, uncomplicated person to lean on. Silas is a genuinely nice guy, and I love him for that. I _really_ wish Lilith were an actual character in the game, not just a game mechanic I never use. You see, IntSys; it's not difficult to pull an excuse out of your ass as to why she shows up once and you never hear from her again! I know this chapter seems to end in unnecessary angst, but it really bugs me that _ALL_ the _MANY_ deaths in 'Birthright' are just _ignored_. Making a big deal when characters die, and then just forgetting you killed them off is rage inducing.


	9. Catching One's Breath

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Ch. 9- “Catching One's Breath”

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Nerr could not recall how many days it took to get to Chevalier, only that the night had grown very late when they finally reached it's high, defensive walls. The side bordering Nestra seemed open to travelers, but beyond it, a large, thick wall loomed blocking any access to the Nohrian heartland. She followed her blood relations, eyes firmly planted on the hard packed dirt road that eventually shifted to cobblestone as she trudged forward. She did not march- she shambled, dragging her uneven, lopsided body along, feeling as if it might fall apart at any moment. Lilith had warned her that she needed to return to a fully human form soon, but she could not.

 

That tiny whisper in her mind when she remained like this that reminded her that she was strong and could continue to walk forward, was the only thing that kept her from collapsing by the side of the road and not getting back up. Her head hadn't stopped hurting since she'd seen Lilith, her stomach constantly roiled with nausea. The scent of the food the Hoshidans cooked when they made camp made her want to vomit, so she relegated herself to the furthest reaches, as far away from the smells- and the people making them- as she could be without dropping off the edge of the map. The Hoshidan royals had, for all intents and purposes, reached their destination. Azura looked around the seemingly deserted city. Aside from a few windows glowing with the light of candles and lanterns, it seemed void of any signs of life.

 

“So, this is Chevalier. Finally...” Sakura twisted the hem of her skirt. After so much wear and tear, it was beginning to fray.

“Oh... I-I hope Ryouma nii-sama is here...”

“I wonder if _anyone_ is here.” Takumi shuddered imperceptibly as he glanced around, taking a step closer to his older sister. “It looks like a ghost town.”

 

“There's probably a curfew in effect.” Silas said calmly. As a royal knight, patrolling places like this was old hat for him. “Given our little upset in Cyrkensia, it's only likely people would be out of the street this late at night; wouldn't want to run into any roving gangs of Hoshidans, now would they?” The Hoshidan prince glared at him, but concern quickly came back to the forefront of his emotions.

“You-- you don't think some anyan scum maybe got the jump on him, do you? I mean, nii-san's the strongest, toughest person I've ever met, but...” He trailed off, his thoughts clear; regardless of strength or skill, one man could not fight off an army. Hinoka shook her head, expression hard as she looked into her brother's eyes.

 

“Have faith, Takumi-kun. Soon, the six of us will be reunited in the fight against Nohr!” Pain surged through Nerr's temples as though someone had just shot an arrow through one side that came out the other. She limped past the royals, unable to contain her bitter thoughts.

“...yeah. I can't wait for all _five_ of you to be reunited, happily trying to kill the people who raised and loved me...”

“Nerrida--” She slapped Hinoka's hand away the moment it touched her shoulder.

“Don't you 'Nerrida' me; my name is 'Nerr'.” That hurt almost as much as her casual hatred, this woman blatantly refusing to refer to her by the name she had come to identify herself as. And to believe Hinoka's words, she herself had been the one to _give_ Nerr that name, an affection nickname for her little sister that she went out of her way to not say any more, perhaps because she felt it had been tainted by the Nohrians.

 

It stung harshly, the way these people alienated her whilst simultaneously trying to include her in their group. She stumbled away from the pain, or at least, away from the source, ignoring her blood siblings calling out to her to come back. No, she was done with them. She had promised Sakura that she would help them find Ryouma, and their best lead was that Ryouma was somewhere in this massive city, so her obligation was complete. Nerr fell against the nearest building, leaning against it heavily as her vision warped back and forth between color and monochrome. Her chest itched fiercely, especially close to her shoulder where it seemed the leathery dragon hide that coated her left arm was slowly spreading.

 

Sometimes she felt a similar itch at her back, the skin near the scar left by Takumi's Fuujin yumi pulling painfully as the bones beneath it shifted. The cold weather was the only reason she managed to keep any errant wings under control, the fear of shredding what precious few clothes she had and being cold. She was so tired... she needed to rest for a moment; sleep was growing ever more illusive. The princess closed her eyes for a second, the thoughts swirling in her mind growing louder, a harsh whisper in her ears. She could hear the sound of boot heels clicking on the paved streets. If there was a curfew in effect as Silas had suggested, it could have been a border guard inspecting the source of voices. The echoes seemed funneled directly through the alley she was standing in, and Nerr opened her eyes, squinting into the darkness. She could see a figure's shadow wavering in the lamplight across the cobblestones.

 

“Who the hell is that? A guard?” Hinoka voiced her own thoughts. Takumi sounded less curious and more apprehensive.

“You don't think it's Prince Xander, do you?” A low, feminine giggle rang out through the darkness and Nerr's heart leapt into her throat, at once longing as well as fearful.

“Oh, that's not Xander. But it might definitely be trouble...” Even in full armor, Camilla was every bit as elegant and lovely as the most beautiful court lady. She had always envied her sister's overt charms, the way her hips swayed with every step, the way she carried herself with so much grace and dignity, be it at a ball or with a deadly ax hefted over her shoulder as it was now. Stopping a few feet from her lost sister, the eldest Nohrian princess swung her holy ax, the blade sinking into the dark stone street as though it were soft wood. Frost branched out from the point of impact in beautiful fractals as Camilla flipped her long, lilac hair over her shoulders, smiling. Without even thinking about what she was doing, Nerr walked forward- it was as if her feet had a mind of their own. She was used to approaching her sister, whenever the older woman found the time to visit her in the citadel, usually bearing gifts.

 

“Ah... I see you missed your big sister...” Camilla's one visible violet eye softened and she smiled wider, reaching out and cupping her sister's cheeks, the soft leather of her gloves warm against the chilled night, her tender expression warmer still. “You're so _cute_... Oh, my darling Nerr! I missed you _so_ much!” She pulled the younger princess into a bone breaking embrace. Nerr had to twist her head to avoid being smothered by her sister's massive bosom (a genuine threat she and her siblings often fell victim to) but other than that, did not fight the hug.

 

In fact, after a few seconds had passed, she found her hands reaching up, clutching at the short purple mantle that covered the older woman's shoulders as if it were a lifeline. Camilla squeezed her tighter in response, and Nerr felt her eyes burn as they welled up. She missed this, simple affection, freely given. She _craved_ it, more than she craved food or air, she _needed_ it. It had been months, _months,_ since anyone had held her like this. The Hoshidans, she had come to realize, were not an affectionate people. She thought that perhaps it had been just her, that they were using things like love and the deprivation of it to make her give up on Nohr, but the whole time she had been traveling with them, she had never seen Hinoka or Takumi or Sakura, or even Azura, do anything as simple as hug. Her mother had hugged her, that first confusing day when she'd arrived in the capital, but that had been the extent of affection shown. Camilla reached up, gently stroking her tangled, dirty hair.

 

“Shh... there there, my sweetling. Mommy's here... A little birdie told me you'd probably be on your way here, and I just had to come and see you.”

“I missed you...” She whispered, her throat too tight to speak any louder. An angry growl from behind her caught her attention, and as much as she didn't want to move, she could not ignore the popping and crackling of flames. Hinoka's teeth were bared in rage, her Amaterasu drawn, the light of it's magenta flames dancing on the walls around them.

“Back the _fuck_ off, lady; that's my sister you're smothering!” At once, Camilla's warm and doting face turned cold, hatred etched into the faint lines just beginning to show at the corners of her mouth. When she lifted her head, Nerr could see the deep cut burned into her cheek that Hinoka had left during their last encounter, the flesh a shiny pink and pulled painfully tight. At least her hair had grown back to cover it mostly.

 

“I'm afraid you're mistaken; Nerr is _my_ sweet little sister. I'm finding it more and more impossible to believe that she could be related to an ugly, byak slut like _you_.”

“Camilla, _stop._ ” She didn't like seeing her sister like this, hearing these ugly insults spewing from her lips. The older woman looked down at her, hurt in her eyes.

“Are you defending her, Nerr? Why- because she's your _new_ big sister, your _better_ sister?” That she could even think such a thing...

 

“Camilla... I know you know I could never replace you. I'm not even trying- _you're_ my big sister.” Whatever blood she shared with Hinoka did not change the fact that it had been Camilla taking care of her for the past fifteen years, doing her hardest to fill the roles of both older sister and mother whenever possible. This was the woman who used to sing her lullabies, and clean her ears... Camilla was the one who had rushed to the citadel straight away to calm her panic when she'd woken up with the sheets drenched in blood and in so much pain she thought she was dying, explaining that it was a natural and somehow “beautiful” thing (a claim which Nerr still contested). In three months, she'd never actually had a conversation with Hinoka. How could a few drops of blood really be that important? The elder Nohrian princess frowned slightly, looking down at her sister with utter confusion written on her face.

 

“Then why won't you come home? You could have come back with Xander in Cyrkensia; he told me he spoke to you--”

“HA! _That's_ what he's calling it?” Nerr pulled away, the warm embrace suddenly feeling much chillier. “Challenging me to a duel to the death- _that's_ speaking to me?” Camilla waved her hand flippantly.

“Oh, you know that our silly brother prefers to speak with swords rather than words.”

“I tried to kill your father.”

“Nonsense. That was all these wicked Hoshidans' doing. It's not _your_ fault they dragged you into their schemes.”

 

“I'm afraid that would be _my_ doing.” Azura stepped forward, her expression hard. “Hello, Princess Camilla. Do you know who I am?” Camilla looked as though she had just seen a ghost.

“Azura... I-- I thought you-- Father said you were dead... he said those savage Hoshidans--”

“Killed me? Or did gods know what else? No... They treated me like family. They protected me, something he could never be bothered to do. For fourteen years, I waited for him to bring me home... but he didn't. Because he didn't _need_ me, not like he _needed_ Nerr.”

 

“And now, he doesn't need _me_ anymore, either.” Nerr added, trying to sound strong and resolute though her head was spinning with pain. “So he can kill me. Oh, he wouldn't do it himself, of course; that's why he has henchmen, to do his bidding. That was _my_ purpose, after all, sister- I could waltz into Hoshido and get my mother killed so his armies could sweep in and finish the job. And likewise, he can just as easily get Xander to kill me, or get Hans to kill--” She stopped herself, the pain in her skull growing sharper. She needed to _not_ think about that monstrosity, she needed a clear head. Camilla looked down, her hair falling into her face and casting a dark shadow over her eyes.

“I can't believe you'd honestly think Xander would hurt you... You know him better than that...”

“It seems I _don't_ , Camilla! He has done _nothing_ but hurt me since I ended up in Hoshido.” The older woman shook her head, reaching for something at her hip, a tome with a faded, red leather cover.

 

“...Father warned me that this might happen. Since the day we had to leave you in Hoshido, I've tried to console myself by telling myself that at least you might be happy there. You were free, you could make new friends... you had a new family that loved you almost as much as we did... All I ever wanted was for you to be loved and happy, dearest... But Father said that wasn't how Hoshidans thought. He said they would fill your head with evil lies and slander about us, that they would make you hate us... and he was right...!” Camilla raised her head, a wild look in her eyes as the air around her glowed with runes. The moment she lifted her hand, magic visibly channeling into her palm, Nerr threw herself out of the way, feeling the heat of a Ragnarök spell detonate right where she had been standing. Her skin felt like it would blister even though it was protected by her clothes.

 

”Camilla, what are you doing!?” Her Hoshidan siblings were in an enraged panic.

“N-nee-sama, get away from her!”

“Gods, will someone hurry up and kill her?!” Hinoka met her brother's harried cry with a furious calm.

“I'm already working on it!” She hurled her flame-wreathed nageyari at the other princess, but Camilla had retrieved her Artemis ax, swinging the massive weapon easily with one hand and knocking the spear aside. The fire and ice magic contained within each weapon erupted when they clashed, cinders and snowflakes floating to the ground. Before Hinoka could pull her weapon back, the taller princess had reached her, holding the ax mere inches from her throat. Puffs of steam surrounded the frosted blade as the moisture in the air around it froze. Her hand was steady, but the rest of Camilla's body trembled and twitched slightly, a tic going off in her cheek.

 

“Oh goodness, I'm so terribly jealous of you all! My dearest widdle Nerr chose you instead of us, instead of _me...!_ Like I wasn't enough for her. Who will leave next- Leo? Elise? She'll never be our sister again... We've loved her _all her life_ , but that wasn't enough to keep you monsters from forcing your _lies_ down her throat! You couldn't be content with taking Azura away and making her hate us; you had to do it to Nerr too!?” The older woman drew her ax back far, all the way behind her back, winding up for a deadly blow. That was the only thing that gave Hinoka enough of an opening to get away, scrambling and throwing her back onto the street as Artemis came swinging down, the thick head embedding in the brick wall besides where the Hoshidan princess had just been standing. The clay froze before the ax even touched it, and shattered like spun glass upon impact. It was not hard to imagine the same thing happening to the redheaded woman's skull. Wrenching her weapon free, Camilla sniffled, tears streaking her face.

 

“I'll make you pay for taking them from us! You destroyed my family! I'll slaughter each and every one of you savages! First Azura, now Nerr- if I kill you all, you can't take anything away from me again!!” Nerr had never seen her sister lose her composure before. Even at the fete, when some middling noble had said something mean or salacious to her (she really didn't remember many details from that awful night), the eldest princess of Nohr had simply sauntered over and punched him in the nose, shattering it without ever dropping her calm smile. This was as terrifying a sight to behold as it was heartbreaking. Lights were beginning to come on in the windows as the the commotion woke people from their slumber, and more steps seemed to be drawing closer, undoubtedly the border guards. She tried to approach her sister, to calm her from her miserable fury.

 

“Camilla, please! Calm down; it's not like that!”

“Lady Camilla! Is it time? You didn't give the signal, milady.” Time seemed to slow down as that hateful voice worked it's way into Nerr's ears, slithering into her brain like a thick, slimy slug that left malefic trails over everything it touched. She saw Hans run into the alley, looking exactly as she remembered him, though there were several burn scars on his chest, the pink standing out against this chalky white skin. He was speaking to Camilla, just like he had spoken to her at first, that respectful, subservient tone that masked his hateful, murderous intentions. She had told Xander what this wretched excuse for a human being had done at the border, she told her brother of his sin, yet here he stood, speaking to her sister as if everything was according to plan. And Camilla did not recoil from his malignant presence like she should have, festering cancer that he was; no, she looked back at him like he was expected, wiping the tears from her cheeks.

 

“Yes, yes, it's time; sorry for the delay.” Nerr could only draw breaths in short, shaky gasps, her lungs unable to work correctly as shock overwhelmed her. She stumbled away from the woman she once called “sister”.

“Yo-- you're working with that-- that oozing sore of iniquity?! That vile, misbegotten abomination!? Camilla, how _could_ you!?” She had never felt so betrayed in her life, not even when Xander had attacked her on the Hoshidan plains, disgust lacing his voice as he sneered at her, _Traitor..._ This was a hundred, thousand times worse.

 

“I'm sorry, dearest Nerr.” She reached out to her sister, but the younger woman recoiled from her touch, unwilling to let hands that collaborated with Hans come near her. “I wish things didn't have to be like this, but they do. Father knows you're here to meet up with the Hoshidan prince, and I can't allow you to do that. In fact, _he's_ probably the main one I should kill, this is _his_ doing more than anyone's...” A thoughtful look came over her face, and Nerr yelled in outrage. She was making a scene, but she didn't give the remotest damn.

“Fuck Ryouma- HANS is the one you should be killing! This is all _his_ fault, his and Father's! I'd have never ended up in Hoshido if it hadn't been for them!”

“Those Hoshidans really did a number on you, huh, Lady Nerr? Who knows what other kind of lies they have you believing?” He was smirking at her; he had the audacity to stand there, smirking, breathing, _living_ , while Gunther was _dead_ because of him! She reached into her bag, gripping her dragonstone so tightly, she feared it might shatter in her grasp. Agony tore through Nerr's skull as her bones shattered and grew larger, muscles ripping in places as they stretched and found new anchors. Her jaw felt as if it had been snapped clean off, the skin on her cheeks tearing to allow the mandible to detach before it fused to her palate. The world was no longer just black and white- everything was tinged with red.

 

 _“You son of a bitch! I'll MURDER YOU!!!!”_ She charged at him, not knowing exactly _how_ she would kill him, but with every intention of making him suffer. She could not see the fear in his eyes, but she could smell it emanating from him, thick and acrid and vile, and the most satisfying thing she'd ever smelled. She leapt over Camilla's head, an easy feat now that each leg was nearly as long as the other woman was tall. Hans was running, she wouldn't land right on him like she had been hoping to, but she could match his pace easily. The alleyway was narrow, though, too narrow for her to spread her wings and change direction... or stop to avoid the ball of fire that ignited in front of her face. The flames engulfed her, her thick, dewy skin the only thing that kept the magical fire from truly hurting her, though it seared her lungs when she breathed. She hit the ground hard, a cloud of steam rising around her, obscuring the source of leathery flapping. As she lifted her head, she saw Camilla mount her revenant wyvern, tugging at Theodorus' reins, urging her mount back into the air.

 

“I'm so sorry, dearest. I only pray you can forgive me for this. If the only way I can keep you from those monsters is as a corpse, then so be it.” She flew north, towards the border wall, but Nerr knew she was not retreating. She could hear more steps, the clanging of armor, the thundering of hooves. Slowly, she began to shrink, both the mental and physical strength leaving her form. She didn't get up, though, opting to remain where she was, lying on the dirt. Thin white hands tried to pull her up, but she was in no mood to fight gravity.

 

“Nerr, get up! Soldiers are coming! Please!” Takumi's voice was filled with arrogance and hatred, a far cry from Azura's panicked plea.

“You see? _This_ is what you're so eager to return to? If ever you needed proof that Nohrians are batshit crazy and evil, you've just witnessed it first hand.” She had neither the energy, nor the chance, to respond to his claim, as a pair of cavaliers appeared in the alley, one wielding a sword, the other, a slightly rusted lance.

“It's the Hoshidans!”

“Get 'em!”

 

They barely had time to tighten their grips on their weapons before the spectral forms of a horse and a sheep collided with them, composed of amber and white flames respectively. The telltale spells cast by Hoshidan mages. The orange flames engulfed one solider, and he dropped his sword, crying out as the magical flames seared through his armor, falling from his steed in his desperation to put them out. The other cavalier did not seem as affected by the magic, and dug her spurs in, urging her horse forward, lance raised. She swung at the first Hoshidan she reached, which happened to be Azura. The songstress cried out in pain as the spear tip cut into her arm, blood soaking into her glove. By that time, Takumi had summoned an arrow, letting it loose as the Nohrian soldier approached the others.

 

It hit her square in the face, her lowered visor not stopping the magical projectile, merely containing the shower of blood and flesh that exploded as the arrow made contact. The force knocked her from her own saddle, her steed rearing up in fear. Nerr looked over her shoulder, watching as the body spasmed for a moment before going still, blood pooling onto the street. The princess slowly got to her feet, noticing almost belatedly that both of them looked the same, ending in actual, human feet, not a twisted spear. Despite being stiff, she could put weight on her right foot without collapsing in pain; she had no time to try and understand how that was possible at the moment. All she could do was reach for her own blade, the Yato's ridged grip feeling foreign in her hand. Azura got up as well, clutching her bleeding arm, hot red oozing between her fingers.

 

“If we can subdue Camilla, we can get the other soldiers to lay down their arms.” She said, her voice tight with pain. Sakura rushed over to heal her, while Hinoka scoffed in agitation.

“There's a whole city crawling with Nohrians between us and her.”

“Then we kill anything that gets in out way.” Takumi said, his manner much too blithe considering he was speaking of murdering people who were simply doing their job. Nerr had had it up to her eyeballs with him.

“No.” She said firmly, her voice low and cold. “We are not killing anyone else. These soldiers are simply doing their duty; in case you've forgotten, _we're_ the ones invading _their_ country. Injure them if you must, but you won't be killing anyone.” The other Hoshidans stared at her in silence, her harsh tone quieting any issues they had with her orders. All but Takumi, who of course stepped up to her, his eyes narrowed in anger.

 

“And what if I decide 'better safe than sorry' when it comes to crazy, Nohrian filth?” She reached out with the hand not holding her Yato, the hand that, if she so willed it, would be a massive jaw lined with teeth the size of knives, wrapping her fingers around his throat. She could feel him swallow, feel his Adam's apple bob under her fingers.

“Then I'll rip you in half, little boy. 'Better safe than sorry', after all.” Perhaps there was something in her eyes, or else, he just understood that the dark, seething anger in her voice was not to be tested, but the Hoshidan prince nodded slowly, and she removed her hand. More footsteps were approaching, and Nerr backed away, glancing over her shoulder to make sure more shadows weren't looming from the other end of the alley.

 

“We need to split up; they're going to try and flank us with a pincer formation, and they have _many_ more soldiers than we do. Hinoka, you and Takumi stay here and beat them back- Jakob, Silas; you come with me to try and cleave a path through the other side.” Surprisingly, her blood siblings nodded, obliging by her orders even though Hinoka was clearly in charge. Jakob seemed more reluctant than they did.

“Milady, are you certain that's a good idea? We'll be outnumbered.”

“We're not laying siege, Jakob; we're clearing a path to Camilla. I just need to talk to her...”

 

“Nerrida-sama, I will accompany you.” Suzukaze stepped forward, his expression stony. Rinkah was right behind him.

“Me too; can't let you hog all the glory.”

“I-I'll come too!”

“Perhaps I should join you as well.” Sakura and Azura moved to join her small group as well. Their numbers were almost evenly split like this. Nerr nodded, and turned on her heel, realizing just how much she had taken that simple movement for granted all these years.

“Then keep up.” She dashed off, knowing her Nohrian comrades were on her heels and assuming the Hoshidans were as well.

 

A few tress grew around the city, small and clearly intended for decorative effect more than practicality, but they still managed to provide cover for anyone who wished to lurk in the shadows. An ax fighter, his leather armor barely concealing the bulging muscles that flexed with each movement, leapt out from one such shadow, moonlight glinting on the steel ax raised high above his head. He swung at Nerr, but his strike was wide, and she dodged it, not as nimbly as she once might have, but well enough. Drawing the Yato back, the princess slashed at his lead arm, the brass blade sinking easily into flesh, blood splashing at their feet. He howled in pain, quickly silenced as she smashed her fist, still gripping the sword, into his face. As he hit the ground hard, the others who were with her caught up, moving past her. Several archers, dark hoods raised to hide their faces, took aim. Arrows rained upon them, those fleet enough, like Kaze and Nerr, ducking out of the way. Silas raised his buckler to protect his face, the iron heads leaving deep scratches as they clinked against his armor, but otherwise, falling away to be crushed beneath Plavo's hooves. The cavalier reached for his javelin, hurling it towards one of the archers. It hit the man's leg, the bone cracking loudly as his shin bent at an impossible angle, dropping him to the ground like a sack of bricks.

 

Rinkah hissed in pain, snapping off the fletching from one shaft that stuck out of her muscular chest. Gritting her teeth, the oni charged forward, the air around her wavering as she raised her club, hitting another archer in the chest with enough force to snap several ribs. She could hear more cries, battle cries and cries of pain, from behind her, as well as the clang of metal and the crackle of magic. Perhaps she should have been worried for her blood siblings; after all, they were greatly outnumbered by the Nohrian forces, their silk robes and lacquered armor a far cry from the chain mail and steel plates that encased royal soldiers, but... She had a feeling they could hold their own. These soldiers, numerous though they may have been, seemed ill trained, breaking formation easily. As Suzukaze peppered another band of cavaliers with small shuriken, their size belying their wicked, strength-sapping poison, their horses startled, rearing up in pain as the iron barbs cut into the flesh not protected by their barding. One knight was thrown from his saddle as the horses bolted, leaving him easy prey for Jakob and Rinkah. The way their forces were scattering, it seemed a regiment twice as large was laying waste to them.

 

The sound of a door clicking open behind her caught Nerr's ear, and she turned to see a shadowed figure slip into one of the nearby houses. It was entirely possible that it was the home's owner, running back in after peeking out to see what all the commotion was, but then, why would they have left the door wide open? Gritting her teeth, the princess ran after the figure, not even making it over the threshold before a high, childish scream rang out. A man in a shabby red cloak was grappling with a boy of about sixteen, while a much younger child cowered, crying, in the corner. Gripping her sword tightly, Nerr ran forward, pulling the brigand back by the the strap of the quiver he wore across his back. She smashed the pronged pommel of the Yato against the back of the head, cringing slightly at the sound of bone crunching loudly. The man went limp, falling into a heap at her feet. Heart thudding with pent up nervousness, she heaved him away from the panting young man and threw his body back outside, before looking up at the would-be thief's victims. The older of the boys was badly bruised, his lip and nose both bleeding as his left eye began swelling shut. The younger one sniffled piteously as he looked up at her, trying to stem the flow of tears and snot running down his face.

 

“Wh-who are you...?” It was hard to decide; saying she was a princess from either country seemed a bad idea, so Nerr simply shook her head.

“No one. Are you okay?” The older boy nodded, wincing and raising a hand to his battered head.

“Y-yeah... you rally gave that swineshagger what-for... You must be one of the resistance fighters, yeah?” Resistance who? He nodded again, taking her silence for affirmation. The little boy's fear fell away at once, and he beamed at her.

 

“You are? You really, really are? Wowie! You're gonna fight all those meanies from Nohr, right?” ... _what?_ Nerr could not tell what was more horrible, the fact that Nohrians thought a Nohrian was fighting other Nohrians, or how _happy_ they seemed about it. The older boy (they were probably brothers) handed her a coin purse that had fallen on the ground, grinning through his pain.

“Here. It's what that scumbag soldier was trying to steal. It's not much, but hopefully you can put it to use.” Solider? The princess was tempted to scream at him, how stupid could he be, mistaking a degenerate criminal for a royal soldier? “Take it, and keep fighting the good fight.” She viciously slapped his hand away, sending the purse flying, it's golden contents scattering all across the floor. She glowered at him.

 

“Keep it, you ungrateful _filth_.” Turning around, she stormed from the home, slamming the door shut behind her and stepping on the brigand she'd knocked out for good measure. The nerve of them, speaking so openly about an anti-Nohrian resistance, _daring_ to assume she was a member of it simply because she did what any solider would in her place. Her headache was coming back full force, the throbbing behind her eyes making everything pulse and flicker. She closed them, leaning back against the front wall of the house, needing to get her bearings for a moment. The white plaster that coated the bricks felt cool against her skin. A murmur of voices reached her through the darkness, probably coming from the next alley or two over. People talking, their voices fearful. It couldn't be her motley crew, she could see them, trussing up a few of the soldiers a couple yards away. So it must have been more soldiers. Perhaps they realized that their comrades were being picked off like flies, and decided it was best not to rush around the same corner. A sneering bellow of a voice lashed out at them, and Nerr heard the metallic grinding of something cleaving through steel.

 

“Fucking cowards! There's just a handful of them! We should've been _done_ slaughtering them by now. I'll show you how it's done, you worthless maggots!” The moment that voice breeched the haze of anger in her mind, the princess began walking towards the source, sheathing her sword. Azura, who had been singing, trying to keep the small band's stamina high, cut off her song as the Nohrian girl marched past her.

“Nerr? Where are you going?”

“Nee-sama?” She ignored them, stopping several yards from the mouth of the alley, just as Hans' pallid figure stepped into the light. He paused as well as he noticed the girl in front of him, then smirked, tapping his massive ax against his shoulder. She could see it was rusted and chipped in places, dried blood forming a thick crust along the cutting edge. Clearly, he did not care about upkeeping his weapons, but why would he do anything that might shorten the suffering of his victims?

 

“Well, well... looks like it's just you and me again, milady. Heh. I always wanted a trophy; I missed out on getting one from your old fuck toy.” He dropped into a fighting stance, teeth bared just as any bloodthirsty animal would upon finding their prey. “Maybe I'll just put your head in a jar, _after_ I fuck it a few times!” He charged at her, but Nerr did not move. Her vision went white as he approached, and she avoided his wild swing, feeling her arm tear apart at the seams as it reformed into a spear.

 

She could hear roaring, but couldn't tell if it was in her mind or if she was screaming aloud as she leapt up, her arm extending like a spring uncoiling, the ricochet giving her even more lift. The tip of the protrusion met Hans in the chest, just below the point where his clavicle met his shoulder, slamming him into the ground. He cried out in pain, squirming and trying to free himself, but only serving to widen his wound. The tip of her hand was stuck in the street, with such force that the stone had fissured, deep cracks branching out like spiderwebs as Hans' blood soaked into them. He was like a butterfly, impaled with a pin. No, she thought as she reached up with her other hand, brushing against the brass keepsake in her hair; butterflies were pretty. He was like a fat, slimy maggot, wriggling as she prodded at him. Her organic spear grew shorter, but that only served to lower her to the ground, not afford the monster she'd captured any relief. She brought her foot down on his shin, her heel bruising, but there was not enough force to break the bone. She remedied that problem with two more stomps, each harder than the last, the crack of his bones almost drowned out by his throaty scream of anguish.

 

 _“_ _That wasn't my 'fuck toy' you murdered, Hans. It was the man I loved, and now... I'm going to murder YOU.”_ She dropped to her knees, poleyns driving into his well muscled abdomen and knocking the breath from him. She wanted him to see her, to see the monster he turned her into, while she killed him.

 

He wasn't deserving of a quick death; she was going to let him bleed out, _slowly_ , as she drew out his pain. Balling her human hand into a fist, she smashed it into his face. The pale man had turned, and her fist collided with his cheek, the flesh deforming under the blow. She struck him again and again, listening to the sound of bones growing weaker as they slowly fractured beneath swollen, discolored skin. Blood ran freely, from his face and the wound in his arm, the smell tantalizing to her draconic senses. _Finish him._ _It's what you want_ _._ She stretched her mouth open as far as it could reach; with no flesh or tendons hindering her jaw, she could feel the sharp cuspid-like protrusion that the mandible ended in scrape against her breastplate. The terror in his eyes made her mouth water, and she could feel saliva, thinner than she was used to, stream from her gaping maw, dripping onto Hans' shaved skull. He cried out in terror, writhing against her as she engulfed his head in her mouth. One bite and it would be over- she knew without even thinking that her jaws could snap shut with the force of a bear trap, shattering his bones and brain. The muscles locked in place like a spring; all she had to do was trigger it--

 

“Nee-sama, stop!!” Sakura's high pitched keen cut through her ears like daggers, and she looked back instinctively, wondering what was wrong. That had been her mistake. She hadn't noticed the pair of women, more Nohrian soldiers judging by their attire, approaching her. One, a petite blunette wyvern rider, hurled a throwing ax at her. It was wide, but enough to startle her, which in turn allowed Hans enough of an opportunity to plant one of his boots on her stomach and kick her off. The only consolation was that it clearly hurt him more than her, as the spear-like appendage scraped against nerves and muscles as it was pulled out of his flesh, and he cried out. One of the girls, with long red hair that fell down to her thighs, pulled the fighter to his feet roughly, shoving him back in the direction of the alley, clearly not caring about his broken leg.

 

“What the hell are you doing, idiot? Retreat!” Color returned to Nerr's vision, but it was muted by the white hot burning rage she felt. She didn't know who these women were, but they were helping Hans, they'd helped him _escape!_ Roaring in frustration, the princess pulled her blade free, breaking the twine that held it in place in the absence of a sheathe. The red-haired girl barely had time to duck her savage blows, parrying with a silver sword of her own. “Naga's breath! Cut it out, Lady Nerr! Don't you even recognize us?!”

“You helped him get away!!”

 

“We have orders.” The other said, her voice as emotionless as her face while she pulled a bloody ax from her saddle. “We are to assist the army in killing everyone from Hoshido. Lady Camilla cried when she ordered us to kill you, but orders are orders.”

“Gods, Beruka, don't _tell_ her that!” So, her sister, who acted as if she still loved her so much, ordered these people, who must have been her retainers, to murder her. That barely fazed her, the rage of Hans' escape too vivid in her mind.

“You let him escape! I'll kill you!” She slashed at the other girl again, feeling no satisfaction as she drew blood this time, for it was not the blood she was after. She had been so close. The wyvern rider, Beruka, swooped down and swung her ax at Nerr's head, prompting the princess to parry. That left an opening for the redhead, and she thrust her blade through a gap left by one of the missing plates in her armor. It sliced easily through wool and skin alike, a searing agony tearing through her as hot blood coursed down her side. The girl actually had the decency to look ashamed of what she had done.

 

“Look... I'm sorry, okay? But... orders are orders...” Nerr had no time to even think of a response to that plaintive apology as a worn dagger flew past her ear, slicing deep into the girl's cheek. She cried out, dropping her sword as she reached up to stem the flow of blood with her leather gloves. The blade, now lacking a counterweight, slid from the princess's side and she cried out as well, trying to put pressure on the wound. Jakob ran past her, another knife in hand and a furious glare marring his pleasant countenance.

“You _bitch!_ I'll fucking kill you!”

 

“Selena!” Beruka's cry was met with pain as a javelin was hurled at her, scraping against her wyvern's head as it met with her left side. The steward had tackled this Selena to the ground and was currently grappling with her, trying to stab her in the throat by the look of it. Nerr wanted to tel him to stop, to remind him that they weren't killing any of the soldiers, but it was getting harder and harder just to stay upright. Despite the sticky, wet heat running down her side, she was freezing. The only, _only_ regret she had was not killing Hans when she had the chance. There was a clatter of hooves as Silas rode up, his sword cutting through the leathery membrane of the wyvern's closest wing. With a roar of pain, it fell to the ground, viscous blood pouring onto the cobblestones as it, as well as it's rider, were grounded. Beruka dodged his next swing, parrying with her ax. Amidst a flash of sparks, the cavalier yelled down to Jakob.

 

“What the hell are you doing?! Nerr is _bleeding to death_ right next to you!” It seemed the steward had only just realized the dire straits his mistress was in. Slamming his gauntlets into Selena's face once more for good measure, he scrambled to his feet, running back to the princess, who by this time had fallen to the ground. She was beginning to tremble, unable to control her muscles as she continued losing blood.

“Oh, gods above! I'm so sorry, milady; I'll fix you right up!” She could just barely make out the glow of healing magic emanating from his staff. The vivid green she knew the aura to be seemed washed out and dull to her, but she did not have long to dwell on that as the gash in her side stitched itself back together, burning even worse than when the blade sank into her. Her head was swimming, pain and frustration filling up her skull until the pressure felt as though it would kill her. Distantly, she could hear footsteps running towards them, the pitter patter of sandals and bare feet, but it was almost completely overtaken by the flapping of wings. Camilla's voice rang out over her.

 

“Oh, my poor sweet baby! I'm so sorry; I told my retainers to kill you quick and painlessly, but sometimes, they just don't listen.” Groaning in pain, Nerr pushed Jakob away, forcing herself to her feet. The world tilted and she nearly fell back down, but willpower alone kept her upright. It was hard to focus on the darker shadow of her sister against the night sky, but she could just vaguely make out the afterimage trailing from Theodorus' eyes with each wing beat.

“Camilla...” Her mouth felt dry and stiff, but she had to keep speaking. “I don't want to fight you... but I will cleave you in twain to get to that spineless maggot, Hans. _Get out of my way!!”_ She charged forward, not caring what attacks came her way. If she was going to die, it was going to be with the satisfaction of knowing she had put that monster out of her misery. A different type of flapping filled the air behind her, and a snowy blur cut through the night sky.

 

“Clear the way!” Hinoka's Amaterasu rained a shower of cinders down upon them as it scraped against Camilla's armor, but the Nohrian princess would not go down so easily. Gritting her teeth, she swung her ax. The redheaded woman managed to pull up before it could take off her head, but the frosted blade bit deeply into her arm, shattering her crimson rerebrace and sinking into the flesh of her bicep. Hinoka screamed in pain as the flesh around the wound turned black, and Takumi raised his bow, drawing the magical bowstring back as far as the tension would allow.

“Die already!” In contrast to the Hoshidan princess, Camilla tried to drop in altitude, but the magical arrow managed to hit her in the arm, the resulting burst of wind pressure released by the blow enough to knock Theodorus to the ground. As the older princess tried to right herself, her left arm hanging limply while blood splattered onto the street, Nerr walked up to her, smashing the flat of the Yato into her face as though it were a club. There was a sickening crunch as her nose broke, but even that did nothing to alleviate the younger princess of the anger that pressed against her temples. Hans was probably long gone by now, fled like the craven pus sack he was, just as he had done at the Infinite Chasm. She'd come so close, only to fail again... A small, timid hand reached up, brushing against her elbow. Sakura's face was white with terror, exhaustion and who knew what else as she looked up at her older sister, concern in her eyes.

 

“Nee-sama, you're hurt--”

“Get away from me!” Before she could stop herself, the Nohrian girl slapped her blood sister's hand off her. “This is all your fault! I'd almost killed him; why the fuck did you have to stop me?!” If Sakura had just kept her damn mouth shut... The younger princess's eyes widened as they welled with tears. She covered her face, sobbing loudly. The sight of those tears filled Nerr with guilt, but the guilt only served to make her more upset. Takumi approached his little sister, letting her bury her face in his chest as she continued to weep, glaring at the older woman.

“What the hell is your problem? Don't yell at her!”

“Shut your fucking face, Takumi! Don't tell me what to do!” She was in no mood for his attitude. Unable to bear the angry, hateful, and disappointed stares burning into her skull, she turned her attention back to Camilla, who had covered her face with a trembling hand. The purple, calfskin gloves she wore had been stained a nasty, dark color, and blood dripped between her fingers. She noticed her sister staring down at her with cold eyes, and cringed slightly.

 

“Well... if someone had to defeat me, I'm glad it was you, Nerr.” Her voice mas muffled and nasally, and sounded almost as tired as Nerr felt. “Are you going to kill me now? It has to be you... don't let anyone else do it.” Anyone else... if given the choice, the Hoshidans would gladly finish her off; she could just picture Takumi's itchy fingers twitching on his yumi. Of course they wouldn't care; Camilla was just another enemy in their eyes, another faceless blob with an ax that threatened their way of life. But the princess was her sister. Her stupid, twisted, _evil_ sister who was willingly working with Hans and preventing her from getting any measure of solace and who she just wanted to _choke_ for a while... but her sister none the less. Her anger fizzled out, replaced with misery and a soul deep sickness.

 

“...no, Camilla. I can't just kill you in cold blood. Or at all.” Lowering her hand a bit, revealing the entire bottom half of her face was caked in blood and unsightly swollen, the older woman smiled wryly.

“What's wrong? Can't you even put a defeated enemy out of her misery? Surely the Hoshidans have taught you that much, at least.” She looked away, frustration coming back. It killed her to know that her family thought she was so feeble minded she could be indoctrinated in so short a period. A hand, chilled but soft, reached up to touch her cheek. “Aw, you're making your pouty face... at least _that_ hasn't changed. That's the Nerr I know and love, so sweet and stubborn...” She let her hand drop, her lower lip trembling slightly. “So then... why did you betray us, sister? Tell me! Why are you fighting for Hoshido?!”

 

“I'm NOT!!” Nerr screamed at her, her voice cracking in fury. “Stop asking me questions you already know the answer to, damn it! Listen to me! Father was manipulating me, probably for as long as I've been in Nohr! That sword he gave me was _cursed_ , that's why it exploded! It nearly pulled me into the Infinite Chasm as well, _after_ his right-hand man Hans knocked Gunther into right before my eyes! And he claimed _that_ was on Father's orders as well as the attack he provoked! He knew the Hoshidans would capture me and bring me before their empress; why else would he have sent me there? Am I truly to believe he and Iago didn't _know_ those forts were crawling with Hoshidans? Do you believe your king is that _stupid?!_ ” Nerr stumbled back, breathing as though she had just run a mile, her head swimming as her vision blurred and wavered. She let out a shaking breath, lowering her voice so it was only her sister who could hear her.

“...I've always been willing to die for the glory of Nohr, sister, but not like that. Not as an unwitting explosive, not as a tool to slaughter defenseless women and children. And not for the man who orchestrated the murder of the person I held dearest in the world.” She always thought her sister wasn't fond of her retainer, but what did it matter now? What could she do, send him away? The eldest Nohrian princess seemed to need a moment to digest what she had just been told. It looked as if this was the first she was hearing of their Father's plan. Had Xander really not shared with their siblings all the _lies_ she had told him?

 

“But... then... if you were carrying that sword... what would have happened to _you?_ ” Nerr rolled her eyes so hard, she could practically see the inside of her skull.

“Don't play dumb, Camilla; it's an ugly look on you. I'd have died as well- that shrapnel was coming straight for me. It was only by my mother's sacrifice that I still live. Father didn't care if I lived or died- all that mattered is that I lived long enough to be of use to him. Which is exactly why I couldn't return, why I _can't_ return.” Camilla shook her head slowly, her eyes growing wide in horror even as they glazed with pain and blood loss.

 

“How DARE he even _think_ about harming a hair on your precious head! There are such easier ways to kill a monarch... To use our dearest darling as a pawn... it's unforgivable! Hasn't he lost enough children!? Who would he send next; Leo? Elise?! Oh gods, Nerr... I'm so sorry! Xander didn't-- he said that you--” Whatever lies Xander had told them would remain secret to her as the ground beneath Nerr's feet trembled. She cried out as razor sharp branches exploded through the stone beneath her feet, jagged fragments slicing through her skin like knives as the vines snaked their way around her limbs, digging tightly into her flesh. The Hoshidans cried out in alarm, readying their arms for a perceived new wave of attackers. But as Nerr struggled against her bonds, the sound of iron shod hooves slowly echoed through the now still air.

 

“Hell and damnation! Leo?!” The dark knight appeared through the gloom, his tome glowing with the thrum of magical energy.

“Stop your struggling, traitor. And please, stop trying to brainwash my sister with your filthy, byak lies.”

“Fucking hell, Leo, you know damn well I'm not--” She paused as another figure appeared in the prince's wake, limping but still upright, and still alive. “Son of a bitch!” She shrieked in outrage. “Not you too, Leo; how _could_ you!?”

 

“Oh, enough out of you.” The trees holding her bent suddenly, dragging Nerr with them until her hair brushed the filthy streets. She had seen pictures of trees like this, used for traps and snares and-- it was only then that she realized what was happening, as they snapped forward, releasing her and sending the middle princess flying back into the crowd of Hoshidans. She smashed into the cobblestones face first, pain exploding in her skull. She heard something small and metallic hit the ground a few feet away, skittering to a stop. As several pairs of hands tried to pull her back to her feet, she could vaguely make out the sound of Camilla arguing with their brother. “Sorry for the delay, sister. I'll take over from--”

 

“Leo! What is wrong with you?! Xander was wrong, little brother; Nerr is still the same person we--”

“Camilla... She's playing you for a fool. Do not allow her to do so! It's too late for her; she's been tainted by the Hoshidans, just like Father feared.”

“But--”

“Your wounds are serve. You need to pull back with your retainers. Go, sister. _Now._ ” Nerr managed to somehow stay on her feet without Silas and Kaze's support, and she began stumbling towards her brother. Not now, damn it. She was so close to making at least _one_ of her siblings see the truth; she would not be thwarted now.

 

“Leo...”

“Don't say my name, traitor. I gave you a chance to stay with your wonderful new family in Hoshido, but you had to look a gift falicorn in the mouth. Now? Now I'm going to kill you and all your little friends. It's the only way to fix what you've broken.” His calm, cool demeanor seemed to be slipping from him, and she saw him pull his lips back in frustration. “If you don't want to be my sister, _fine!_ I'll erase you from my heart _forever!”_ He flipped open his Brynhildr tome, it's pages glowing as he began channeling magic through them.

“Leo, no! _Please_ , listen! You're smarter than this, you--” Her plea was cut short by her brother's cry of pain as he lurched forward in his saddle.

 

“What the?” He voiced her thoughts aloud, turning his steed about face to see this newest threat. A figure in thick steel plates, similar to the armor Nohrian knights wore but distinctly red, unlike the black and blue and silver she was familiar with. It seemed he had thrown a club at Leo, judging by the dent in the back of his cuirass. “Who are you? What the hell?!”

“...wouldn't you like to know.” The interloper's voice was muffled by their armet, but it sounded deep, and distinctly masculine. Hans, as battered and bloodied as he was, was hardly one to pass up the opportunity to have an excuse to kill people.

 

“How dare you attack Lord Leo?! Prepare to die for your mistake, Chevois scum!”

“Heh. And how do you propose defeating us with so few soldiers?” The Chevois knight's face was concealed, but it was clear from his tone that he was smiling.

“What are you talking about?”

“Soldiers! Sally forth!”

 

“We're on it!” Another voice, this one cockier and female, judging by the timbre, rang out, above them. The swishing of dozens of pairs of wings filled the air with a deafening roar as the sky was blotted out with wyvern riders. Their leader, her armor the deep red of drying blood, shouldered a vicious-looking ax with a serrated head. “Look at these pathetic losers. We can take 'em, no problem.” Leo blanched at the sight of so many knights.

 

“Gods,” he muttered. “When did the resistance get this strong?”

“Milord, we must retreat! With our current troops, we don't have a chance against their numbers!” It was hard to believe it was Hans who was talking, but Nerr remembered that he had seemed like a perfectly normal soldier for a time with her as well. The prince grit his teeth. She knew her brother could not stand being showed up at anything, but of all their family, he was the wisest, and most pragmatic- a trait she often wished she shared with him. He did not take on fights he could not win.

 

“Damn it all! If Camilla weren't injured... but you're right. Sister, you and Hans lead our troops back to base, we'll regroup there.” Hans as already on his way back towards the border by the time Camilla got back in her saddle. Her wyvern rider retainer was heaving the other girl into the saddle alongside her, her injured mount barely able to take off. The eldest princess shot Nerr one last, pained look before taking off as well and making her way back to the border to. Leo was the last to leave, his parting glance brimming with animosity.

“This isn't over, Nerr! If I ever see you again, you're gonna have a bad time...” Digging his heels into his steed's barded sides, the young prince also turned and galloped away. And with them, Nerr felt her last chance of ever being able to set things right disappear as well. Her heart fluttered painfully in her chest, beating much too fast. The world spun and tilted sideways as the ground rushed up to meet her. It seemed like she had only blinked, but when next she opened her eyes, Silas was once again at her side, holding her upright. The crimson-clad wyvern rider had landed, and was talking to the knight who'd started the ambush. They were fairly close by, but Nerr couldn't make out their words. Someone was crying too loudly, too close to her ears. It took a long time, feeling the warm water drip down her chin and onto her neck, before she realized it was her. The Chevois woman, who had choppy blonde hair, was laughing at something her comrade had said.

 

“Ha! They turned tail and ran like little pussies! I guess the Nohrian royal army isn't so tough after all.” Beside her, Silas was growling in his throat. Given that he was a part of said army, that had clearly been a blow to his pride.

“Considering we all but decimated their numbers before these buffoons got here, I'd say that isn't the standard to judge by...” He whispered to Nerr, anger tinging his voice. “I don't like these Chevois...” She didn't either. Granted, it seemed she had only come across four of them, and that was hardly an apt representation of the duchy as a whole, but those four had left an unpleasant taste in her mouth. Azura, her dress a dingy gray and her skin slicked with sweat, approached the knights, speaking with a slightly hoarse voice. She must've been singing nonstop.

 

“Thank you, strangers. I'm not sure what would've happened had you not arrived when you did.” The other woman smiled widely at her.

“No problem. I'm Scarlet, by the by.”

“A pleasure. My name is Azura. So... is it a stretch to assume _you're_ the leader of this resistance we've been hearing about?” Scarlet laughed, clearly pleased.

 

“I see my reputation precedes me! Yeah, that's me, and that's us. Even though we live in Nohrian territory, we can't stand Garon. That's why we're on your side- you guys are Hoshidan, right? It's kinda obvious, what with your clothes. The enemy of my enemy and all that, right?” As dizzy and nauseous as Nerr was, she could not stop herself from speaking out, her throat still tight from tears.

“If you hate being under Nohrian rule so much, why don't you move somewhere else, you whiny bitch? I'm sure you'd love Hoshido, if it weren't for their new 'kill all Nohrians on sight' policy.” The faint chatter, which had just begun to pick up now that the battle was truly over, died at once. The silence was thick enough to spread on toast. The armored knight was the one to break it, with a chuckle that sounded more like an exasperated scoff. She wished he would take that stupid helm off so she could punch him right in his (probably) stupid-looking Chevois face.

 

“Oh, shut up.” She snarled at him. “Don't you laugh-and-or-scoff at me. You think you're tough because you act like you weren't scared of Leo, but that's only because you're a fucking idiot who doesn't realize he could've killed you without breaking a sweat! If only we were all so stupid...” The knight stopped his insufferable laughing and stepped towards her, his sabatons echoing loudly as they clattered against the stone streets. Jakob and Silas had both drawn their weapons, and looked ready to use them at any moment. Perhaps not wanting to start a fight, the mystery man stopped a good few feet from her.

 

“...you still don't know who I am, do you?”

“I don't know, nor do I care.” Whomever it was, it could be nobody she had any burning desire to see. He shook his head, reaching up to grasp his armet with both hands.

“Oh, Nerrida... still as headstrong as ever, I see.” Nerr's blood ran cold as her stomach slipped down to her feet.

“No... it can't be... I'm going to loose my mind if you're--”

 

“Ryouma!” Azura's voice was jubilant as the helmet came off, revealing a face surrounded by a mass of wild brown hair. The high prince had tied it up as best he could, but it still surrounded him like a mane. Without his demonic face armor, he almost looked like a normal person. The other Hoshidans all exclaimed in shock and joy at the sudden resurface of their long lost regent. The Nohrian girl's blood pressure had reached it's peak, and she could only gasp in fear and pain her heart pounded and her vision faded to black.

000

 

A/N- I dislike the localization toning down Camilla's yandere personality. Honestly, it just makes her behavior seem even weirder to me. Like, I understand that a yandere would kill the person they love if they couldn't have them, because they're crazy and it's what they do (and it's what endears us to them). But a 'My Beloved Smother' type? That just seems... off. But aside from that, fucking Hans, man! We were so close! And boy, is Nerr a bitch when she snaps or what? Aw well, we'll have to just pack it in and try again later, won't we?


	10. They Who Fight Monsters

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Ch.10- “They Who Fight Monsters”

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Nerr awoke to find herself in a room with stone walls. That sight, of exposed masonry, was so welcomed and familiar that she allowed herself to smile and close her eyes again, relief flooding her body. It had all been a horrible nightmare, some hellish fever dream, but now she was awake and back home where she belonged.

 

“I see you're finally awake.” The voice, a deep male voice that should have been pleasant to listen to, caused every muscle in her body to tense at once, so hard she felt a massive cramp spread through her. Crimson eyes snapped open, and she saw Ryouma standing over her, his face impassive. Wearing simple robes, his long hair falling loose around his face, he looked like a completely different person, but she would always recognize those dark, cold eyes as the same ones that had threatened to have her executed in Shirasagi when she refused to accept his reality.

 

The Nohrian girl sat up, biting back a wince as a dull ache throbbed in her side. This room, though similar to her room in the Northern Citadel, was clearly different upon a closer glance. From the crates stacked high to the piles of shields and weapons in the corners, it seemed that this was some kind of store house. She wasn't alone with the high prince, either. The other Hoshidans milled about, some sitting or laying down as their injuries were treated. She could see Hinoka getting her arm bandaged by her poofy-haired retainer. The flesh was still a sickly, rotten color- the ice magic imbued in Camilla's Artemis had probably given the red-haired princess a bad case of frostbite. With any luck, it could be fully healed before it devolved into gangrene. At least it wasn't her lance arm. Her blood brother continued speaking, apparently not caring if she had any input.

 

“You took quite a beating out there, Nerrida. I'm surprised you lasted as long as you did, considering how much blood you lost. Pleasantly so.” Still she remained silent, pointedly looking away from him. “This is the Cheve Underground. It's where the Resistance meets. We should be safe here for the time being.”

“Fuck off, Ryouma.” She spat at him, unable to bite her tongue any longer. For a moment, his princely demeanor fell away, and she relished his discomfort at her harsh words, raising her voice so the entire “base” could hear her discontent. “I think I speak for everyone when I say this... You're a miserable piece of shit. Your family's been worrying themselves sick over you for the last three months, and what are you doing? Chumming it up with your new traitor friends and their slut leader.”

 

Everything about this situation made her sick. She could tolerate being around Hinoka and Takumi. She almost liked Sakura and Azura, to an extent- at another time, in another life, they were the kind of people she would've liked to be friends with. But simply being in Ryouma's presence filled her with a cold, bitter loathing; she could not, _would_ not, forgive him for his role in keeping her prisoner in Shirasagi. She needed to get away from him, to put some distance between them so she could breathe again. Getting to her feet took more effort than she would have liked to admit, but she managed to walk over to the furthest corner, just far away enough that she could collect her thoughts. Her armor was gone- it was just as well; there was no way she'd be able to wear it again. It was no better than scrap metal at this point.

 

Glaring down at the dusty stone floor, she realized that she was looking at two whole feet. The left one looked normal, like it always did, but the skin covering the right foot was darker, much darker, as though it had mortified. But that was not possible. Nerr wiggled her toes, watching as they responded her her thoughts. Clearly the flesh was not dead. Actually, the color looked closer to her draconic flesh. And if she squinted, she could see thicker patches of skin, almost like scales, over the part of her foot that had been conspicuously missing. She knew her entire anatomy changed when she transformed, bones breaking and reforming into other bones, muscle taking on more mass- it was likely that she grew new bone and flesh as well. After all, those massive wings had to come from _somewhere_. Lilith had said remaining transformed (at least, half transformed) would have serious side effects. She could live with blue skin if it meant being able to walk again. Behind her, the silence brought on by her cold, rude remark had finally been broken, by Azura of all people.

 

“Don't listen to Nerr, Ryouma. She's just upset. We may have been worried about you, but we don't begrudge you your absence.”

“W-we all missed you so m-much, nii-sama!” Sakura cried out tearfully.

“I knew you'd be fine... but I'm still glad to have you back, nii-san.” Takumi's voice was controlled, but there was a bit of an emotional waver at the end. Hinoka's, in contrast, was strong and proud.

“We've been counting the days, brother. Now that we've all reunited, nothing can stop us!” Ryouma remained silent for a moment, but when he spoke, his voice was warm, loving... none of the things Nerr had ever heard from him before.

 

“Thank you, everyone. It warms my heart to see you all again- these past three months have been hell without you. And I must apologize for making you all worry so much. To think of all you've overcome to track me down...” He paused as emotion seemed to choke his voice. “I've never been prouder to be your older brother. Now that we're all back together, it seems like anything's possible.” The Nohrian girl refused to turn around to see the scene unfold, but in her mind's eye, they were all hugging and rejoicing. That was stupid, though; Hoshidans were too cold and aloof to hug. She was projecting her own family onto them; after all, that's what they would do if they hadn't seen Xander for three months.

 

The thought of the crown prince made her heart clench painfully- she could just imagine him saying those same words, _I've never been prouder to be your older brother..._ It had been so long since she'd heard him say he was proud of her, or tell her she was doing a good job... Not since she'd managed to best him while they sparred her last day in the citadel. _'To hell with you...'_ She though bitterly towards Ryouma, the one responsible for dredging up those painful thoughts and memories. _'Xander's my only older brother..._ ' Even if he hated her, even if he thought she was a traitor... even if he would kill her to protect his wicked, cowardly father, he was now and forever her brother. Scarlet's annoying voice cut through her thoughts.

 

“I like the sound of that. So you all must be Ryouma's siblings, right?” Oh, so in three months, he hadn't mentioned his family to this woman? How suspect. It sounded like he was living a double life, free of the burdens of the family who'd been moving heaven and earth to find him.

“Ah, yes. It seems introductions are in order. This is my younger brother, Takumi. And my sisters, Hinoka, Azura, and Sakura. The sullen, foul-mouthed one sulking in the corner is Nerrida. Everyone, this is Scarlet.” The resistance leader hummed loudly in thought.

“...huh. Y'know, those names are awfully familiar. Are you named after members of the Hoshidan royal family? And the Nohrian royal family?” Nerr turned around, disbelief consuming her thoughts. Could it even be possible that this traitorous slattern didn't even know the identity of the man she'd been plotting to destroy her country with? Judging by Ryouma's cringing, hesitant expression, it seemed that was exactly the case.

 

“Er, you could say that... mostly because we _are_ the Hoshidan royal family.” Scarlet stared at him for a long moment... before laughing, punching the high prince in the arm.

“Oh, man! You almost got me with that one- that look on your face, I almost believed you! Ryo, you so crazy... Seriously, though, it's nice to meet you guys.”

“He's telling the truth. We _are_ the Hoshidan royal family.” Hinoka said, frowning slightly. The blonde woman looked between them, even over to Nerr, who shrugged, not caring what she believed. Her eyes widened as she paled slightly.

 

“No... But that's... no! That's crazy. That's stupid! Hoshido's heir to the throne would not be _stupid_ enough to run around Nohr and leave his country unprotected.” The Nohrian princess grinned slightly. Maybe she had misjudged this Scarlet...

“Oh, but he would~” She intoned. “He _would_ run off without telling his sisters anything, leaving them at the mercy of enemy soldiers who didn't get his memo to please leave the country, and then run off to who knows where to play freedom fighter whilst leaving his country to the mercy of the invading forces. Why does that surprise you; did he somehow convince you that he was _smart?_ ” Saizou, Takumi and Ryouma himself all glared at her, but she didn't care. If he didn't want anyone to bad mouth him to his little girlfriend, he shouldn't have started their relationship based on a lie. Scarlet shook her head in shock, looking back up to the Hoshidan man.

 

“Oh gods! Please forgive me, your highness! I had no idea you were _the_ Ryouma!” Rather than be upset with Ryouma for lying and being an all-around fool like Nerr had hoped she would be, the rebel leader fell into a cowering, sycophantic manner. Repulsive. The high prince placed a hand on her shoulder, his thumb imperceptibly rubbing the skin not covered by her rerebrace. She wondered if anyone else noticed that.

“Please, Scarlet. You may simply call me Ryouma-sama.” He dropped his voice to a whisper that only the woman he was speaking to, and the one “sulking in the corner” could hear. “At least, in front of others...”

 

The display made her sick. It was bad enough when she thought of them as one another's whores just to degrade them, but to see there was actually a spark of... _something_ between them? To know that that dastard had been out, gallivanting about and playing house with some traitorous hussy whilst _she_ had to endure listening to Sakura sniffle and Hinoka try and keep Takumi's spirits up for months? It was too disgusting. She moved away from her corner, storming back past the repugnant couple and over to where Jakob and Silas stood. It seemed they had been talking to the Hoshidans, or at least, one Hoshidan. Takumi's outspokenly racist retainer, Oboro, was glowering at both of them. Silas seemed to be trying to placate her, while it was clear Jakob didn't give a damn what she thought one way or another. Nerr cleared her throat.

 

“Have either of you seen my sword?”

“Of course, milady. I have it right here.” The steward bent slight, grabbing the short grip with both hands and heaving it up as though it were made of solid lead. “Goodness, I don't know how you lift this thing, Lady Nerr; I nearly threw my back out trying to bring it here.”

“Maybe it just feels heavy because you're used to lighter blades.” She took it from him with ease, taking a few practice swing. Yes, just as light and maneuverable as she remembered. She would have to hold it now- without greaves or cuisse to protect her legs from it's sharp edge, she couldn't just keep it tied to her belt loose. Perhaps soon, she'd be able to stop at a market somewhere and find a scabbard that fit. Pain was beginning to bloom in her temples once more, and she reached up to rub them with her free hand. The princess froze, lifting her face from her hand and feeling around the left side of her head, just over her ear. Tangled, matted hair, the pointed tip of cartilage... and nothing else. Panic surged through her and her breath quickened.

 

“Oh, gods... where's my hairpin? Where is it?!” She could vaguely remember it being knocked loose when Leo attacked her, but where had it gone? Jakob had grabbed the wrong thing when she passed out; who cared about some stupid sword, she could find a sword anywhere! Silas reached into his own breastplate, pulling out a scrap of metal.

“Is this what you're looking for?” He held it out and Nerr grabbed it from his hand, sighing deeply, a physical relief surging through her.

 

“Yes. Oh, thank you so much, Silas...”

“Yeah... looks like it's seen better days, though. I think it got a little smashed up when it fell.” He was right; several of the pieces of jet that it was inlaid with were missing, and the tip of one of the wings had broken off. Her heart ached, seeing this last, precious keepsake so battered, but at least she still had it. Closing her eyes for a moment, she squeezed it tightly, using all her willpower to move again. The clasp still worked, and she forced the straight end of it through her matted hair, fastening it in place once more. Her head felt balanced now, with the familiar weight.

 

“Alright. I hope you guys are rested.”

“I am ever at your service, milady.”

“I'm as rested as I'll ever be.”

“Good. Because we're going.” Even though she had only been speaking to her fellow Nohrians, it seemed the other people in the room were listening close enough to overhear her.

 

“What are you talking about, Nerrida; everyone's exhausted.” Hinoka protested. Ryouma frowned at her, the warm expression he used when addressing Scarlet or his family turned stony.

“Hinoka's right. We're safe here; there's no need to head out just yet. Considering how far you've traveled, I'd think you'd be grateful for the chance to rest.” The Nohrian princess frowned deeply at her blood brother.

“I don't recall including any of you in this conversation. This has nothing to do with you. I promised Sakura I'd help you all find Ryouma. Well, Ryouma's back, so my obligation to you is complete. This is where we part ways.”

 

“What? What are you talking about?” The shock in Takumi's voice came as a surprise; Nerr would've thought he'd be the first one up to hold the door open for her.

“This shouldn't come as news to anyone. I told you months ago that I had no intention of staying in Hoshido. If you and your brother hadn't gone missing, I'd have left the day after the attack at Fort Jinya. I have to go and find my sisters before Father manages to convince them that I'm a traitor again.” It should have come as no surprise that Ryouma had stormed over at those words, towering over her, his face dark with anger.

 

“... _Father?_ After everything that's happened, after realizing the truth, you _still_ call that monster your father? You still call those fiends your _sisters?!_ ” She pushed him away, too angry to be intimidated by his large stature.

“The only fiend I see here is _you_.” Scarlet approached her as well, as though she had somehow been invited to join the conversation.

“I don't know what your deal with the Nohrian royals is, but you can't honestly expect to talk anything out with them. The only language those barbarians understand is bloodshed. That's why Chevalier has a resistance movement in the first place; to be free from Nohr's oppressive rule!” Everything about this woman made Nerr want to scream, but she was a princess; she would not let worthless peons get under her skin.

 

“...and what, I have to wonder, is so oppressive about it?” She asked, her voice barely above a whisper, but laced with loathing and disgust. “The taxes that haven't been raised in over a decade? The army that provides more employment than anything else in the country? Or perhaps the princes and princesses who would die for you ungrateful maggots? As I've said before, if you find living in Nohr so wretched and unbearable, why don't you just leave? No one would miss the absence of traitorous cockroaches like _you_.” Scarlet cringed a bit in the face of so hateful a tirade, but to her credit, did not back down.

“Yeesh. You, uh... you're really pro-monarchy, aren't you?”

“Those 'barbarians' you despise so much are my brothers and sisters; what do you think?”

 

“Wait... but I thought Ryouma said--”

“Forget what Ryouma said! He's been lying to you for three months; why the hell would you believe him in the first place?! I'm telling you I'm Nohrian, dammit!” The high prince simply glared at her in silence, before turning back to his other siblings.

“Has she been like this the whole time?”

“Look at what she's wearing!” Takumi sneered. “What do you think?” Ryouma looked back at her.

 

“Hmm... how disappointing. Tell me, Nerrida, how are you planning on getting an audience with the princesses of Nohr?”

“I don't _need_ an audience with my family. I'm going home; in case it's slipped your mind, I _lived here_ for the last fifteen years.”

“I see. And how are you planning to avoid the legions of Nohrian soldiers who, last I've heard, had orders to kill you on sight?”

 

“It'll be a damn sight easier without a swarm of Hoshidans at my back insisting we try and take the king on directly at every given opportunity.” Indeed, that had been her plan from the start- for she and hers to simply travel back to Windmire incognito. She wasn't even afraid of being mistaken for a Hoshidan; no one she'd met thus far had made that mistake. There was nothing at all strange about a roving band of mercenaries. The shock of her declaration finally completely worn off, Takumi spoke up with his usual hateful arrogance.

 

“If she wants to leave so badly, let her. She and the Nohrians deserve each other.” That was the kindest thing he'd ever said about her. Sakura on the other hand, did not feel as strongly as her brother. She dashed up to her older sister, tugging at the hem of her sweater as she gazed up with tearful eyes.

“Pl-please don't leave, nee-sama! Is-- is this because y-y-you're still mad at me? I'm sorry, I'm sorry; I wo-- I won't do it again! Please, just d-don't leave!” This trick might have worked on her once before, but, as painful as it was, she would not let the younger princess's tears sway her again. Slowly, she pried Sakura's fingers loose from her shirt.

 

“I'm sorry, Sakura. But I've made up my mind. I'm not fighting for Hoshido, I don't care about these people's perceived grievances, and no one seems willing to acknowledge that, so I think it best if I just lea--” An explosion went off outside, shaking the base enough to stumble all those standing. Dust and debris floated down from the ceiling. “What in the--” Another, louder, more powerful explosion went off, the shock waves caused by this one knocking most everyone to the floor. Someone was attacking, someone with heavy artillery, probably trebuchets. Nerr shot Scarlet an exasperated glare. “I thought this was supposed to be a 'safe house'!” The Chevois woman looked utterly terrified.

 

“It is! Nobody outside the resistance knows about this place!”

“Well, clearly, they know now! We need to see what's going on!” Hinoka was already on her feet, injury long forgotten in a surge of adrenaline. Nerr followed close behind, not caring what happened to these ungrateful dissenters, but certainly not wanting to be caught in the rubble if the structure collapses. In the adjacent room, mix of people in plain clothes and armor were running about in a panic, grabbing weapons and trying to figure out what to do. Scarlet grabbed the arm of the nearest person, a man desperately trying to fasten the straps of his cuirass.

 

“Steven! What's going on, what was that blast?!”

“We're surrounded by royal troops!” He shouted back, his voice laced with terror. “Our forces have engaged the enemy, but we're severely outnumbered!” The leader let him go, falling back as she shook her head in despair.

“No... How did they know we were here...?” The others had joined them by this time, and Azura frowned at that miserable question.

 

“We may still have a traitor among us...”

“Bullshit!” Nerr turned towards the songstress with a scowl. “You saw what happened to Zola; who else do you think is running to give information to King Garon?”

“Hmm, I don't know. Who among us thinks Nohrians can do no wrong and is trying to take every opportunity she can to run straight to their leaders?” Takumi hissed at her. If there weren't such a crush of people jostling them about, the Norhian princess would've taken the opportunity to punch him right in his smarmy mouth.

 

“Or _maybe,_ ” Silas raised his voice so he could be heard over the clamor. “They just didn't _leave_ when we finished fighting them last night, and called for reinforcements. 'Out of sight, out of mind' ISN'T how it works with professional soldiers, people!”

“The how and why do not matter now.” Ryouma spoke up, his voice commanding. “We must evacuate immediately. There's a secret path nearby. Come, everyone!”

“Ryouma, wait!” Scarlet grabbed his sleeve. “That path leads right to heartland Nohr's doorstep!”

“And what about the soldiers here?” Hinoka asked, her brows furrowed. “Are we going to lead them into the belly of the beast, or leave them here to die?” The prince's voice and expression remained hard.

 

“They have other escape routes should they need them. We do not. As as for ending up in the heart of Nohr, that's exactly where I intend to go. Running from the enemy won't bring this war to an end. We need to confront King Garon directly. And I believe that a swift counterattack would be the last thing he expects now.” He turned to Nerr, his eyes searching her face for what, she did not know. “What do you think, Nerrida? You have the same intention as I; seeking out the king directly... Surely you agree with my logic.” The princess laughed harshly in his face.

 

“First of all, I'm seeking out my brothers and sisters, and secondly, I think you have a death wish! Nohr's armed forces rivals Hoshido's entire population, and Castle Krakenburg is one of the most heavily fortified structures in the world! I lived in an isolated outpost, and every Hoshidan who came within a hundred meters of me was brutally slaughtered. You're going to get yourself killed, and what's worse, you're going to get your family and soldiers killed because of your stupidity! ...but I know that's not what you want to hear. You want me to say, 'I think you're right, Ryouma! Your stupid, ill-conceived guerrilla tactics could actually work!' I'm not saying that.”

“And tell me, Nerrida; what other choice do we have?”

 

“Well, if you hadn't wasted so much time getting chummy with these traitors, you could've gone back to Hoshido and organized your army so that you would be ready to defend the capital when King Garon flanked you by sea, because that's what he's going to do. Oh, you thought he was coming over land? That's what he _wants_ you to think, and it's exactly what you did because you're a gods damned idiot. _I_ would flank you, and I'm not half the tactical mind my little brother is. _My_ suggestion? Figure out how to get back home before you don't have a home left to get back _to_.” Her demoralizing speech seemed to have quieted even those rushing to take up arms. The only sounds that could be heard was the faint clamor of fighting outside. For a moment, it seemed like she had actually gotten through to the high prince as he closed his eyes, but Ryouma inhaled deeply and opened them, their dark depths blazing with determination.

 

“By the time we could make it back to Hoshido, this war might already be lost. We must make do with what we are given, and in this case, we've been given a straight shot into King Garon's domain.” While his rousing speech seemed to bolster the moral of his Hoshidan subjects, disdainful as she was of it, Scarlet could not deny her Nohrian roots, nor the pragmatism that came with them.

“I don't know... I kind of like living. It seems like your sister might have a point, Ryouma...” The older man turned to face her, placing both hand on her shoulders as he looked into her eyes.

 

“Scarlet... I understand how difficult it must be to leave your troops to fend for themselves. If you think you can do more good here, then stay. You have no obligation to come with me; you've done more than enough already.” Her dark eyes seemed to falter for a moment, but quickly became resolute.

“No... no, I'll go with you. The resistance here is strong. We may be outnumbered, but we'll win the day!”

“Psh. You'll die trying.” Nerr scoffed. She looked around the room, too exhausted by every stupid decision being made to be afraid of the fighting outside. “Is there a back exit I can use?”

 

“What are you talking about, Nerrida? You're coming with us.” Ryouma tore himself away from his lover's eyes long enough to frown at his sister, who scoffed at him in return.

“Pass. I'd rather not be dragged down any further by your stupid decisions.” The high prince reached out, lightning quick, and grabbed her wrist before she could turn to walk away. She was reminded of the way he'd looked at her back in Shirasagi, his cruel, hateful words, _Then we'll have you executed like a Nohrian..._ Did he think she would ever forget that?

 

“I won't let you rush out and get yourself killed just because you're too hardheaded to realize I'm trying to protect you, Nerrida.” She shook his hand off her arm, returning his glare tenfold.

“Don't you dare pretend that my life matters to you. The only person rushing out to get them self killed is _you,_ Ryouma, and you're just determined to drag me down to hell with you.”

000

 

Once again, Nerr found herself traveling with the Hoshidans for no reason other than the fact that they were headed in the same direction. The only reason she didn't just cut her losses and take her chances with the battle outside was because, first and foremost, she could not put Jakob and Silas into danger like that. Even if she rushed to her death just to make a point, she knew her two dear friends would follow her, because their loyalty was second to none. She could not repay that loyalty with foolishness. Also, disdainful as she was toward Scarlet, the other woman had found her a scabbard for the Yato and a few spare pieces of armor to wear. Granted, it didn't fit well and was quite battered itself, but she would take what she could get. It hurt, to leave her old armor behind, but she knew she could not be weighed down with fifty odd pounds of sentimentality. It felt as if she were leaving so much of herself behind... She reached into her bag, taking stock of her few precious belongings. Her book, her tattered cape and the mournful scrap of cloth Lilith had retrieved for her lay beside her clothes and dragonstone. She could still feel her hairpin, cool against her ear. Everything else was still on her person, so why did it suddenly feel like she was becoming someone else? Closing her bag once more, she tried to direct her thoughts away from her melancholy.

 

“So this path leads all the way inland? Do you really think it's safe?” Scarlet scoffed quietly, shaking her head. Not a good way to inspire confidence.

“It _should_ be. Then again, I thought that our safe house was actually _safe_. We built the path for this exact purpose, but I had no idea we'd use it this soon...” It was Nerr's turn to scoff, in disgust rather than disbelief.

“While the rest of the country starves, you've got enough energy and resources to build a secret friendship tunnel. Inspiring.”

 

“We should be grateful that this path was built, Nerrida. Otherwise, we'd have hell to contend with getting to the capital. Considering your desire to see it once more, I'd think you'd be a bit more appreciative.” A thousand retorts swam through her mind, each more apt than the next, but the stress of even hearing Ryouma's voice was making her sick to her stomach.

“You know nothing about me, Ryouma. You understand _nothing._ Don't make assumptions.” She muttered. A heavy, pensive silence descended on the leading group, and Scarlet looked between the two siblings awkwardly. When she spoke, her voice had a quality of forced cheer about it.

 

“Hey, don't look so glum, chums! I mean, sure; we're charging into probably almost certain death, but at least you get to do it as a family! So wipe that sad look off your face; we're gonna kick some ass!” Nerr naturally assumed the other woman was speaking to her obvious lover, so it came as a complete shock when something hard struck her in the back of the head.

 

Star bursts exploded before her eyes as her head snapped forward, a sharp pain tearing through her neck. She hit the ground hard. For a moment, she thought she was back at the Infinite Chasm, that Rinkah had snuck up on her once again and knocked her out, but she was still conscious. Barely, it seemed. Her vision swam with pain, what had only been a dull throbbing in her temples now graduating to a full blown migraine. The pain from her neck radiating down her spine, and even the faint lights that illuminated the tunnel stabbed into her eye sockets. She choked as a wave of nausea rolled over her, the meager, watery contents of her stomach rushing back into her mouth as she heaved, spraying vomit across the dusty floor. Fortunately, it had only take a few retches for her stomach to empty, though the spasms only made the pain in her head worse. Scarlet seemed to be in a panic as she got back to her unsteady feet.

 

“Oh, shit... oh, shit, I didn't think I hit you that hard...! I thought that was just a little, you know, bump! Just to knock you outta your doldrums!” Ryouma remained silent, saying nothing about his supposed sister getting attacked _or_ her sudden illness. That enraged Nerr more than anything, and her fingers curled into a tight fist, which she smashed into Scarlet's face, just below her left eye.

“Your response to me being upset is to _punch me!?_ What the hell is wrong with you, you crazy bitch!? How do _you_ like it?!”

“Hey. That's enough.” _Now_ the prince could speak, giving the princess a disapproving stare. As the resistance leader tried to right herself, Nerr smacked her in the face again with the back of her hand, just to spite her _brother_ , hatred clawing at her insides.

 

“Does this bother you, Ryouma; me hurting your little wifey? Because it's funny how it didn't seem to bother you when she was the one hitting _me._ The last time someone gave me a 'bump on the head', I was in a coma for days, not that _you_ cared!” She stormed forward, feeling like a child throwing a tantrum but not caring in the slightest. No one else cared, why should she? Gods above, what had she done to deserve being thrown into insanity? It was like a nightmare she just couldn't escape from.

000

 

She could hear the pounding of footsteps above their heads even as they walked, signaling that, wherever they were heading, there was bound to be a large population, and she even informed Ryouma as such. Scarlet, still nursing a black eye, tried to explain it away as the fact that lots of people traveled the road that led from heart of the country to the outskirts, but it was evident by the way she bit her lip when she looked away from the prince that this was not a normal amount of foot traffic. When they popped their heads out from the hidden exit of the tunnel, concealed behind a wall of trees and thick undergrowth, the sight they were met with should have come as no surprise.

 

Dozens, possibly hundreds, of Nohrian soldiers stood guard at the massive wall-like fortress that marked entry into the mainland. Infantry and cavalry alike lined the perimeter, sentinels clad in gleaming armor under the dusky Nohrian sky. Even though those soldiers would have killed her on sight, Nerr still felt her heart swell with pride at the sight of them. Ever since she was a child, _this_ had been what she strived for, her ideal, for nothing seemed more glorious or honorable than counting herself amongst the number of brave soldiers that kept her country safe. The same soldiers she had watched be cut down in Fort Jinya and at the Hoshidan plains... Her stomach twisted and she whimpered slightly. Ryouma seemed to take her sudden melancholy for discouragement.

 

“Take heart, Nerrida. It may seem like the odds are stacked against us--”

“Because they are?” He ignored her pithy interruption.

“...But there is no obstacle that is truly insurmountable.” The Nohrian girl narrowed her crimson eyes, giving the high prince a long, hard stare before finally voicing her thoughts aloud.

 

“...do you actually believe any of what you say, or is this how you cope with stress? I pray it's the later, because if it's the former, Hoshido is in the hands of a madman.”

“Sister--”

“Don't you 'sister' me. I know you think right makes might, but open your eyes, Ryouma; you're going to _die_ if you charge into that.” Ryouma met her stare, some dark emotion playing out behind his eyes as the corners of his lips turned down slightly.

 

“Tell me true, Nerrida; would you have Hoshido simply surrender to King Garon's demands, let him invade our home?” It felt as if a heavy rock had settled in her stomach and she looked away. Somewhere on a moral level, she wanted to say no, to say that the king was wrong for trying to expand his borders and starting a war to do so, but... She could not. Perhaps it was simply a result of living her entire life in Nohr, of thinking of the Hoshidans as her enemy and of being taught that defeating them was everything she and her people could hope for. Silas' words came back to her, about her once father inspiring his soldiers by telling them that they were fighting so that Hoshido's bounty could be shared with those who needed it most. Was she truly supposed to turn her nose up at people who had no food simply because those that _did_ thought the enemy king was oppressive? Resolute as she was in her beliefs, that did not stop her from feeling bad as she looked back to her blood brother.

 

“Nohrian rule isn't as bad as Scarlet and those Chevois traitors make it out to be. If it was, there would be resistance movements cropping up left, right and center. But there aren't; most people _like_ it here, and are loyal to the royal family. King Garon is a dastardly monster, but... his actions have reasons, even if the actions themselves are deplorable. If you surrendered, countless lives would be spared!” A look of deep disappointment came over Ryouma's face, and he shook his head.

 

“What have they done to you to make you value freedom so little?” He asked in a low whisper. Anger, not so much at the prince himself as much as his words, boiled within her. Freedom? She'd _had_ freedom, and what had it brought her? Pain and misery. The freedom to be lonely. The Hoshidan prince raised his voice slightly so that his siblings and soldiers could hear him.

“Listen up. Once we cross the border, there will be no turning back. If anyone is having second thoughts, no is your last opportunity to leave. You will not be judged.” So he said, but Nerr knew that was a lie. If anyone turned their back on their prince at this important juncture, they would be a pariah, as dead to their people as if they had truly perished on the battlefield, and mourned much less. A ripple of apprehension seemed to pass over the crowd, these people's sense of honor battling their sense of self preservation. Hinoka, brash and confident as ever, was the first to step towards her brother and liege.

 

“I'll follow you to the end of the earth, Ryouma. You have _my_ support.” Like dominoes falling into place, so too did the rest of the soldiers voice their undying loyalty.

“Leave you to take care of these anyan jerks all by yourself? Forget it. I'll bend my bow to your will, nii-san.” Sakura, timid as she usually was, did not stutter or falter once as she looked up at her eldest sibling.

“I wouldn't dream of leaving you behind after we finally found you again, Ryouma nii-sama.” This overwhelming, familial display made her heartsick. Nerr moved to put some distance between herself and the Hoshidans, gesturing for Jakob and Silas to approach her. The silver-haired steward rolled his eyes at the royal siblings.

 

“Such a maudlin display; I think I may vomit.”

“I don't trust anything these Hoshidans are plotting.” Silas said in a low voice. “They've got a history of sending their own soldiers to their deaths to take out enemy forces.” The princess's eyes widened.

“What? Surely that's not true.”

“It is, milady. They even have a word for such martyr operations- they call them 'kamikaze' strikes.” She looked between the Nohrian men, then back to Ryouma, disgust filling her. Was that what he intended to do, did he mean to send his soldiers to their deaths to force an opening in the enemy's ranks? She thought back bitterly to the attack in Shirasagi, the death and destruction, Takumi's fury at her for issuing such a craven, Nohrian tactic against them... and all the while, his people used such tactics often enough to have a name for them... Nerr inhaled deeply through her nose, trying to calm herself.

 

“Whatever plan these Hoshidan fools are considering, we'll have no part in it. We are not here to kill soldiers who are simply doing their duty. We'll skirt along the border, trying to avoid detection as much as we can. Silas, you and Jakob might even be able to pass yourself off as guards and slip inside the fort.”

“Well, what about you?” She looked up, at the towering rampart. There were no archers lining it's battlements.

“I've got wings. May as well put them to good use. There's enough cover along the west that we can probably get close. Come on.” The princess was so absorbed in making plans, her heart pounding nervously in her ears, that she didn't notice anyone approach her until she felt a hand on her arm. She nearly cried out in fear, believing that already, the enemy had spotted them, but composed herself as she saw Azura looking at her with a slight frown marring her features.

 

“Nerr. What are you planning?”

“A smarter approach than whatever Ryouma has in mind.” Guilt weighed heavy on her shoulders as she looked into the songstress's golden eyes. She reached out, brushing her hand against the other girl's shoulder. “Azura. I know he's your brother, but he's a fool who severely overestimates his own abilities. If you follow him into battle, he's going to get you killed, you and everyone else here. You remember how your _plan_ worked out in Cyrkensia, yes?” The singer looked down, that debacle clearly still sore in her mind.

 

“...I have to have faith in him, Nerr. If I don't... what else am I to do? Sit back and watch as Garon continues working to destroy everything? I can't let that despot drag this world down to hell while I do nothing. ...isn't there always a risk of dying on the battlefield?” Well, she was right about that. But a good commander would at least _try_ to minimize the likelihood of casualties. But, foolish as this was, Nerr could not begrudge Azura wanting to stand beside her brother, her family. She would've done the same, had she felt any sort of kinship with these people.

“Then I suggest you put your head between your legs and prepare to kiss your ass goodbye, because it looks like Ryouma is starting his attack.” Indeed, the high prince had already assigned his two, battle ready younger siblings to each take a side with a small group of fighters, whilst he and his retainers took the center route.

 

Unsheathing his holy blade, the Raijinto sparked to life, thunder magic charging the air as the blade began to glow white hot. The royals charged out, their retainers at their heels. The first line of defense was several cavaliers and archers, but they seemed taken unawares by this blatant, head on attack. By the time they had readied their weapons, Ryouma descended on them, his katana hot enough to carve through their armor with ease, to say nothing of the flesh beneath it. One unlucky knight screamed in anguish as his leg was severed just below the knee, the limb falling to the dead grass with a dull thump, smoking slightly. Hinoka kept out of the archer's range, swooping down long enough to hurl the fiery Amaterasu at unlucky lancers below her, the heated steel cauterizing the punctures it left even as it seared organs, before pulling back up only to rain more death from above. Steel arrows were no match for the corporeal wind magic of Takumi's Fuujin, the gentle green glow of the arrows belying their destructive force. One of the archers, who had moved closer to try and get a better shot, took the full force of one shot, the holy arrow shattering bones as it ripped apart the muscle and gristle in the man's arm, tearing it off. It seemed they weren't _killing_ the soldiers, but gods, this was so much worse. The panic and upheaval the violent blitz inspired was terrifying. Nerr had to shake her mind to clear it, calling back to her friends.

 

“We stick with our plan. Come on!” Skirting the edge of the battle field, Nerr tried to ignore the screams of pain as Saizou drove his kunai into the eye socket of one of the knights, or the death rattle as Oboro raked her naginata across the belly of another archer, his bowels slipping onto the ground. A pounding of hooves and clatter of armor were all the warning she got before a paladin, brandishing a wicked spear, stopped before her, her steed rearing up.

“Draw back, Hoshidans, or I'll be forced to kill you!” The face seen through the opening in the burgonet was flush with fury.

 

“We're not Hoshidan!” Nerr tried to explain, but she knew there was no point- it was too suspect to be sneaking around in the bushes. With a cry of anger, the paladin hurled her spear at the princess, aiming for her chest. She managed to leap back just as the deadly point hit the ground where she'd been standing, clods of earth and grass flying. While the Nohrian soldier began tugging her weapon free, the other woman's vision turned monochromatic as her arm stretched and tugged, growing longer and larger. She had to hold it aloft with her sword arm as she aimed, her veins burning as magic surged through them, collecting in her palm before erupting, a blast of scalding hot water drenching the soldier. She screamed in misery, falling from her saddle as her steed reared in pain, caught in the blast. Steam rose from her body as she writhed, trying to free herself of the now burning armor that encased her, cooking her faster. Quicker than usual, Nerr's vision returned to normal, and she leapt over the whimpering body.

 

“Come on!” That wouldn't kill her, she silently consoled herself. After all, she had used the same attack on Hans and he was still alive, much to her chagrin. A few burns would not kill a person. More soldiers seemed to be growing aware of the commotion in the brush, and turned the attention- and attacks- towards the source. With the terrors cleaving through them from the front, the last thing they would want was to be attacked from behind as well. Jakob hissed as an arrow struck his shoulder, but pressed on, slashing his dagger across the face of the offending archer, cutting into his eye. Silas's sword was locked with a knight's lance as he fought to keep the sharpened edge away from his own face. The soldier stiffened suddenly, dropping his lance and falling to the ground with a loud clatter. The thick steel plates of his cuirass had been punctured by something sharp, directly over his spine by the look of it. The air beside the fallen knight shimmered, and Kaze appeared from nowhere, stooping down and retrieving long, thin, bloody dart-like shuriken from the armor. His deep blue eyes met Nerr's.

 

“It may be advantageous for you to rejoin our group now that your cover has been blown, milady. There is strength in numbers.” He was right, but... as the princess looked back at the battle field, a golden creature, the size of a small horse, with a long, bushy tail leapt upon a paladin, massive paws knocking the soldier's steed to the ground, crushing it, as a long muzzle tore at the man's limbs.

 _“_ _Let's play!”_ The cheerful voice rang out in her mind, the discordance between the happy tone and the grisly violence exemplifying the scene playing out before her. Many of the remaining Nohrian soldiers were fleeing back to the fort, trying to regroup or else, simply hide from the destruction, those left behind who still drew breath pleading to be taken with them.

 

It was a tiny miracle that the Hoshidans did not seem interested in snuffing their lives out. _'Maybe now, we can talk to their commander...'_ She thought, trying to sound braver in her mind than her shaking hands betrayed her to be. _'Maybe they'll just let us pass, to save their remaining soldiers...'_ Ryouma was approaching the fort with quick, driven steps, his blade crackling at his side. Nerr pushed past the shinobi, running towards him, intending on demanding this battle stop at once. The dead and dying lay at her feet, their blood soaking into the dirt and creating a loathsome mud that stuck to her bare soles. Despite the lack of soldiers, the border's entrance was not unprotected.

 

A hulking, dark-skinned man in ebony armor stood, nearly taking up the entire doorway. A shield, almost as large as he was, clenched in one hand, a long, crimson lance with a viciously serrated head in the other. Beside him, almost in stark contrast, was a pale woman wearing the minimalistic leather armor and steel plates of a fighter, the wolf pelts around her waist barely offering any protection from the cold. With her long, flaxen curls and curvaceous body, she seemed like she belonged in a boudoir more than on a battlefield, but she was as muscular as Rinkah, and the large, steel ax she wielded was clearly comfortable in her hand. Behind her armored comrade, the woman cursed at Ryouma.

 

“Get the fuck back, Hoshidans! Take one more step, and we'll fucking kill you!”

“The only way for you to escape this with your lives is to stand down, Nohrians.” In the face of the woman's hateful vitriol, the high prince remained calm, his sword draw. Surprisingly fleet for someone wearing such large, heavy armor, the knight raised his lance, bringing it down on the space that Ryouma had occupied only second earlier. Such a blow would have maimed, if not killed, but the samurai was deft.

 

“Nothing personal. We're just doing our jobs...” The knight growled in his basso profundo. He raised his lance again, adjusting his grip to use it as a stabbing weapon rather than a cutting edge, but the Hoshidan man was faster. He held the Raijinto before him, his palm against the false edge of the blade as he channeled it's magic. A bolt of lightning shot from the katana, striking the black cuirass. The solider seized violently as the current contained in his metal armor surged through his body, cooking him from the inside out, thick smoke billowing from his mouth and nostrils as the smell of charred flesh filled the air. His guttural death rattle did not last long as the knight fell to the ground, corpse still twitching as the remnants of electricity continued searing his nerves. His fellow guard screamed as the body flopped at her feet, the anger on her face twisting into anguish.

 

“NOO!! Benny!” Hatred contorted her pretty face into a ugly snarl, and she raised her ax, charging at the prince like a feral animal. “I'll _kill_ you!! _”_ Leathery wings kicked up a cloud of dust as Scarlet swooped down, intercepting the other woman's blow and parrying, the serrated edge of her own ax driving through the blonde's exposed sternum. Blood splattered across her pale skin as bones were crushed, and with a final spasm, she too fell lifelessly to the ground. Nerr stopped in her tracks, mind reeling as she tried to process the slaughter that had just taken place. She knew Ryouma was strong- he was the eldest of the Hoshidan royals, she had seen him fight that day on the Hoshidan plains, but to fell a knight in one attack, and so savagely to boot? Before they left the Chevois safe house, he had donned his crimson armor once more, and now with his white robes stained in blood and gore, he looked every bit the demon she'd once seen him as in her nightmares.

 

The other royals caught up with him, they were saying something, discussing their next move. She heard them mention a Dragon Vein, and she looked down at the dusty, frozen ground. She could feel something radiating through the earth, however faintly. Ryouma seemed to hone in on it, just as he had in the snowy north of Hoshido, stepping over the corpses of the Nohrian soldiers and into the doorway. For a moment, he simply stood still, before raising his hand above his head, tendrils of bright amber energy flowing up from his feet, coiling around his body and gathering in his palm, before exploding forth. The fortress shook violently, and from it's depths, she could hear panicked cries that were soon muffled by the thundering avalanche of massive stones falling loose from their mortar, some breaking as they hit the ground, others cushioned by the people caught beneath them. Metal and bones crunched as the soldiers within screamed even louder in pain and fear.

 

The rumbling finally stopped. Dust billowed out through the door. It was with a macabre curiosity that the the Nohrian princess picked her way forward, edging around Ryouma as best she could as the prince stepped inside. Torches mounted in sconces had mostly been extinguished, only a few guttered weakly, casting dancing shadows over the walls. Large sections of the vaulted ceiling had broken loose, massive granite bricks in heaps on the floor. Groaning could be heard from deeper within the fort, pained moans and cries for help and pleas for comrades and friends to answer. Blood oozed out from under the mountains of rubble, sinking into the grout of the fissured floor. A woman's voice, commanding but tight with pain, seemed to be giving orders further in. It seemed she was the commander as she stumbled into the open, clutching a bloody arm that hung at an impossible angle.

 

“Ungh... Sandor? Charlotte? Benoit? Oh gods... are you alive?” With her eerily pale skin and dark eyes, she reminded Nerr of Zola in a way, especially the terror that twisted her face as she saw the Hoshidans standing over the destruction of her troops.

000

 

Those few soldiers that had survived the cave in had been bound and gagged by the Hoshidans, who argued more soldiers would undoubtedly come out this way and find them. Given the way many of them bled profusely, some blacking out as they were marched into one of the storage rooms of the fort, Nerr doubted they would all last that long. The other side of the border was calm, frost on the trees and blades of grass undisturbed by dead bodies, the stench of blood and first carrion wisps of decay almost a distant memory. They were heading towards the forest- at least, that was where Ryouma was leading the Hoshidans. Nerr didn't know where she was going, just that it was away from the slaughter house the border had become. Her feet were wet and cold, and judging by the heavy clouds beginning to blot out the light of the stars, it would either start raining or snowing soon. But those seemed like inconsequential facts.

 

Those soldiers hadn't fallen in battle; they had been mercilessly slaughtered by holy weapons they had no means of defending themselves against, by eldritch powers mere mortals could not hope to understand, much less harness. A battle with Ryouma at the helm was less a battle and more a massacre. Had the prince been leading his troops like that in Hoshido, she would not have felt any animosity towards him; he simply would have been a commander fighting back against the invading forces. But here, now... he _was_ the invading force. He was pushing his way into Nohr with the intent of destroying her sovereign... how was that any different from what Garon was doing? Had she jumped out of the pot, only to land in the pan? Her feet stopped, and she wondered if they had frozen to the ground. No, she could move them if she wanted to, she just... didn't. Staying right here, in the middle of this road, was staring to sound like a very good course of action.

 

“Hey.” Takumi's cold voice barely penetrated the haze in her mind, and she didn't bother looking up as he stopped beside her. “What's your problem? We need to keep moving. Unless _this_ is where you're leaving us.”

“Takumi, that's enough.” Ryouma's voice was firm as he gently chided his younger brother. “Nerrida. What's wrong? Are you hurt?” Yes, she was hurt; her soul ached as though it was being ripped apart. She could feel her lips moving, but it took a few tries before she could actually speak.

“...did that really just happen?” The high prince sounded proud when he answered her.

 

“Yes, sister. We won this battle. It was only by the gods' grace that we didn't suffer any casualties, but--”

“Battle? What battle? I was referring to the massacre.” She could still see that knight in her mind's eye, his already dark flesh blackening as blood leaked from his mouth and nostrils... Closing her eyes, she shuddered, digging the heels of her palms into her eye sockets to try and somehow physically rub that image away. Takumi's voice was unwelcome in her stupor.

“Considering Nohr's numbers, that would hardly qualify as a 'massacre'. What, like, one percent of their troops fell in that battle? A hundred more will take their place.” Lowering her hands, Nerr fixed her blood brother with a dead eyed stare. He flinched, and took a step back.

 

“...Go. Away.” Ryouma heaved a long suffering sigh- she wished she could slit his throat, see how much he'd sigh then.

“Nerrida, we need to make camp. News of this will reach King Garon soon, and--”

“ _Go. Away._ ” Her low, rasp of a whisper brooked no refusal. She could no longer tolerate the presence of these people, her so-called _brothers_ , but she still could not bring her feet to move forward. She didn't care if it was exposed, she didn't care if a soldier could run up and kill her with ease; she just needed to stand there for a while. Despite his saturnine expression, Ryouma nodded, leading his brother away, towards the shelter of the trees.

 

It felt like hours had passed since Nerr stopped walking, night truly falling over Nohr before she could find the strength to move once more. Her joints were stiff and sore from the cold, her eyes stinging, her face and extremities numb. She could detect the faintest whiff of smoke from the woods, and realized the Hoshidans had set up camp in there. Hopefully they'd found a clearing, but she felt they probably wouldn't care if they set a swath of forest ablaze. It wasn't their forest, after all. The Nohrian princess walked towards the trees, but she gave the encampment a wide berth, edging around it. She could hear people talking, their voices almost cheerful. Why wouldn't they be; they had carried the day, after all. There was water nearby. She knew it before she even heard the small waves lapping at the shore, a tide in her veins drawing her towards it, the longing to be near the water similar to the one she had felt when they first began traveling towards Nestra. It seemed so long ago, when she had thought that once she set foot back in her beloved Nohr, everything would somehow miraculously be made right. After a few minutes of walking, she came upon a small lake, the few stars and slivers of moonlight not concealed by the drape of heavy, indigo clouds reflecting upon it's glassy surface.

 

For one long, torturous second, the desire to walk into it's frigid depths and sink below the surface until the bubbles stopped pouring from her mouth and nose was unbearably strong. There were so many problems, and seemingly no solutions. She felt alone. As grateful as she was for Jakob and Silas' continued presence and support, she could not lay her burdens on them, not when they were undoubtedly suffering silently as well. She had dragged them into this mess; the least she could do was not beleaguer them with her whining. Besides, she was a princess of Nohr- she had to remain calm and in control at all time, even when she wasn't. _Especially_ when she wasn't. That had been Xander's most commonly recited lesson, after all, teaching her to conceal her feeling, rather than letting them guide her actions. Emotions did no one any good on the battlefield. Wryly, she wondered if Ryouma taught his siblings a similar mantra; was that why he could kill people and remain so detached? Nerr didn't want to think about Ryouma any more, or Xander, or anything. She reached into her bag, pulling out her cloak. The dark navy cloth was frayed and ripped, mud and all manner of filth staining it's fibers.

 

Leaning her back against one of the tree trunks, she lowered herself to the cold ground and pulled out her sewing kit. The princess's heart constricted with misery as she noticed the filthy scrap of cloth tucked alongside her threads. She would deal with that later- at the moment, she needed something mindless to do so as to shut her brain off for a few minutes. Pulling out a pair of small sewing scissors, Nerr set to work trimming the ragged edges from her cloak. It was in such bad condition that by the time she was done, there was only about a third of the fabric left, but it was something. Returning the golden scissors, she looked at the small cape, frowning slightly. She needed to hem the edge to prevent it from fraying again so easily, but it was beyond filthy. Maybe it would be best to wash it first. Jakob and Flora had always been the ones to wash her clothes, but there couldn't be any exact science to scrubbing a rag in soapy water, could there be?

 

Just as the princess was about to get up and make her way to the water's edge, a she caught a slight movement out of the corner of her eye. A glimpse of white that vanished back into the shadows of the trees. _'...the Crying Woman...?'_ She vividly recalled the tale Gunther used to spin for her and Jakob when they were children, of a beautiful woman in a white dress who could always be found weeping near bodies of water. If approached, she would drown the unfortunate passer-by, just as she had drowned her children. _'No...'_ Nerr shook her head. _'No, that's silly. I'm making myself parano--'_ A faint whimper froze her thoughts as well as her body. Suddenly, a soft voice wove between the trees, a familiar voice singing a familiar song.

 

 _“_ _You are the ocean's gray waves, destined to seek life beyond the shore, just out of reach...”_ The Nohrian girl relaxed at once. It was just Azura, though her voice sounded a bit strained, as if she were out of breath. Part of Nerr's mind wondered what the singer was doing up so late and so far away from camp, while part of her just wished she could go be pensive somewhere else. That song was starting to get on her nerves; familiarity bred contempt, after all. But at the same time, that strained voice was worrisome. As they fled Nestra, the songstress had looked as if she would faint more often than not, and she did not seem to have caught a second wind yet. It was true that everyone was growing weary from the constant marching, but even Sakura looked less haggard than the blunette woman. She was so damn weak and delicate, like a fine, porcelain vase; pretty to look at, but something that needed to be locked away lest it shatter into a thousand pieces. Nerr had never had use for fragile things in the citadel.

 

Deciding that it would do no one any good if the Hoshidan princess collapsed in the woods from the exertion of walking a few yards, she began heading in the direction she had seen Azura vanish in. She had scoured the woods and undergrowth, but it had been a slight splashing that finally alerted her to the songstress's whereabouts. She sat in the shallow water of the lake, her long lazuline hair pulled around her thin shoulders like a blanket. Well, at least it was good for one thing. Could there be a more brooding scene than that, of a pale waif wallowing in sorrow in the water on a moonlit night? Nerr hoped the other woman appreciated the poetry of the scene, because she certainly wouldn't get to relive it when she was dying of pneumonia. _'Now there's a sheltered princess if I've ever seen one...'_ She stepped towards the shore.

 

“...seems a bit cold for a swim, what with it being the dead of winter and all...” Azura jumped a foot, turning around, eyes wide with fear, to face the approaching woman.

“Nerr?! Oh, good lord, you nearly gave me a heart attack!”

“Be grateful I'm not an assassin; I'd have given you a blade to the back of the skull instead. What are you doing out here, aside from catching your death of cold?” The Hoshidan princess frowned slightly, her eyes narrowing.

 

“...were you following me?” Nerr laughed coldly.

“Get over yourself. I came out here to be alone with my thoughts and away from the Hoshidans, then you appeared, belting out that stupid song at the top of your lungs.” The blunette's frown deepened, not taking kindly to her song being insulted, but she really didn't care. Thinking about that song made her remember Izumo, and Cyrkensia, which only made her angrier and more confused. “I wanted to ask you something; namely, to keep it down. I have a headache.” Golden eyes scrutinized her, trying to decide if she was telling the truth or just trying to be hurtful. Hurtful as her words were, Nerr _was_ telling the truth; she could feel the ever-present vice grip begin tightened it's hold on her skull with every passing second. It seemed Azura noticed that too, for even though she didn't look pleased about it, she nodded.

 

“Very well. I'll be quieter.”

“Thank you. You should also get out of the water and put on some dry clothes. Hypothermia can kill you before you even realize what's happening.” The other princess sighed slightly.

“I suppose you're right. In Hoshido, at least in Shirasagi, it's always tepid, even in the winter. I could swim year round. I forgot how cold Nohrian winters are.”

“Yeah, they're a doozy. Come on, up and at them.” Nerr stepped into the icy water herself, the cold burning her bare skin for a moment before a sense of calm washed over her, enough that she sighed a bit.

 

It would be so nice to just stay there for a while, soaking her feet in the water, but it was freezing, and she doubted Azura could recover from frostbite as quickly as she could. She grabbed the other woman's arms and pulled her to her feet. The singer smile gratefully for a second, before pain overwrote her expression. Her eyes widened as she grit her teeth, sucking in sharp gasps of air through them as her body went stiff. Panic surged through Nerr and she looked on in fear as parts of Azura's skin grew transparent, the layers of fat and muscle, and even bone beneath slowly slowly becoming clear, like the water in the lake. It looked as though she would burst with the slightly jostle, the tinniest pinprick. Tears streamed down her rictus face, and the other princess felt them sting her eyes as well as she stood, powerless to help. All at once, the liquid flesh returned to it's usual opacity, and the singer collapsed. She'd have fallen back into the water had Nerr not been there to catch her, pulling her (gently, so very gently) further onto the shore and laying her down. Golden eyes, glazed with pain, slowly fluttered open.

 

“Oh gods, Azura, are you alright? What's happening to you, what _are_ you?!” Nerr remembered the things similar to that, creatures that looked and behaved human, but were simply water given a human form... right? The singer smiled weakly, breathing hard.

“I'm okay now. It's fine, it's nothing.”

“It's clearly _not_ nothing! Are you one of those things, those water monster things that attacked us in Shirasagi?” Azura's tepid smile fell away, a glint of something akin to fear in her eyes.

“No...”

“Then what are you?!” The Hoshidan girl sighed deeply, slumping, as though she had burned through the last of her strength trying to act like things were fine.

 

“I'm... like you, in a way. Like you, I carry special blood in my veins.”

“Well, obviously.” Nerr said, stating a simple fact. “We're descendants of the First Dragons. My blood is like Ryouma's, yours is like Xander's.”

“Not... exactly...” Azura looked away. “Haven't you ever thought it strange, Nerr? That, of everyone in your family, only _you_ can turn into a dragon?” The Nohrian girl paused, allowing the question to sink in. Really, she had never given it much thought, too concerned with the litany of other problems she had to think of, but... it did seem a bit strange.

 

“Maybe they just haven't triggered it yet? I mean, if it hadn't been for everything that happened at the Chasm or in Shirasagi, _I_ never would've known.” But even as she said the words, she knew they weren't entirely true. Her allergic reactions to wyrmslayers, her strange, pointed ears... Even though she shared her crimson eyes with both Hinoka _and_ King Garon, neither of them had the strange, felid pupils that she did. Even without the rage and grief that triggered her transformations, she would have realized one day that _something_ was wrong with her. She looked back to Azura. “So, what? Are you a manakete, too? Am I going to start turning into water?”

 

“No, and no. At least, I pray you won't. This is... a curse. Carried in my blood. Remember when I started speaking to you about my song back in Izumo?”

“I remembered that you _stopped_ speaking about it abruptly.” The singer looked down at her hands.

“Well... I don't know if you know this, but you were very cold and standoffish back then.”

“ 'Back then'?” Nerr asked sardonically, earning a slight grin from the other girl.

 

“Yes, you're right; not much has changed, but... back then, I thought you were just a bit of a... _bitch._ Now I understand you a little better. I've seen you be kind and compassionate, and I've seen you at your lowest moments. It's easier to think of you as a person now, instead of just another Nohrian.”

“Gee, thanks. So, why don't you talk to me like a person and tell me what kind of messed up witchcraft is up with this song?” Azura sighed deeply.

“It's not the song so much as medium. You could think of it as a magical tome. I can sing it for fun, or even to give people a pick me up, but if I channel my powers through my pendant, the medium... the power is amplified, but so is the cost.” Nerr leaned back on her hands, taking a moment to digest this new information. That explained why the stone set in the gilt pendant only glowed sometimes, and perhaps even how the singer could occasionally bend water to her will.

 

“...so that's what you were doing when you sang for me, and Takumi, and in Cyrkensia; you were using some sort of spell.”

“That's right.”

“And it makes you... dissolve? What? I don't--”

“Don't try to wrap your head around it, Nerr. It's hard for me to understand at times. It's just a toll that must be paid.”

 

“The hell it has to be paid!” The Nohrian girl even surprised herself with the anger in her voice. “Stop doing that. No more singing from you.” Azura's eyes widened, and she frowned at the other woman.

“I _have_ to. Trust me, Nerr, I don't do this lightly, but each time I have, it's been required. And it will be required again in the future. We'll need it's power to defeat King Garon--”

 

“Bull. Shit.” Nerr leaned towards the singer, causing her to shrink back from the anger in the other girl's crimson eyes. “Stop acting like what you're doing is necessary. You didn't stop me from freaking out in Shirasagi, and you didn't accomplish anything except to give us away in Cyrkensia. You won't be saving the day with the power of music, Azura; the only thing that will defeat King Garon is having his throat slit.” Her anger drained from her, leaving her tired and worn.

“...I hate to tell you this, given that your mother taught you that song, but you greatly overestimates how special it is. I think your siblings like telling you things like, 'you can captivate an audience!' because it makes you feel better. They've tried it with me too, acting like this hunk of rusted scrap metal they call the Yatogami is some kind of super-special miracle weapon that can make everything better by existing. Them and their stupid 'chosen' nonsense...”

 

“They didn't make that up to make you feel better, Nerr.” The songstress protested, her strength slowly coming back. “That's an ancient prophecy. Even Chief Fuuga and Izana-sama knew about it, and they have no way of knowing who you are. Of all the people there, that sword chose your hand and yours alone to wield it. Nobody else can even carry it! When you passed out in Kazeho, Hinoka nearly got a hernia trying to pick it up for you.” Jakob had said something similar, she had seen him struggle to hand it to her... “You can't say there's nothing special about that...” Nerr sighed deeply, her eyes itching with tiredness. She had stopped believing in fairy tales a long time ago. Dashing knights did not save princesses from their towers, no one lived happily ever after, and there was no such thing as a “Chosen One”.

 

“This is the reality of it, Azura; you aren't special, and neither am I. A sword is a sword, and a song is a song.” She got to her feet, feeling the pins and needles sensation of her leg having fallen asleep, and stretched out a hand to Azura. “Come on. The royal army's going to be on our ass by morning, so we need to sleep as much as we can.” The singer took her hand without hesitation, allowing herself to be pulled up as well.

“I suppose you're right.” She hesitated for a moment, looking as though she wanted to say something else. Nerr prompted her with a raised brow. “Oh, I was just wondering what you were doing out here before I came. Ryouma said you'd make your way to camp eventually, but it had been about an hour since I saw you.”

 

“I was sewing something.” That wasn't a complete lie- though it hadn't been her intention at the start, and though she hadn't gotten a chance to even thread a needle, that was what the Nohrian girl was planning to do before she saw Azura.

“Really? Hm. I don't think I've even darned a sock before...”

“I'm beginning to doubt your claims of ever having lived in Nohr.” Nerr said, only half joking. She was a princess; all girls are taught to sew in Nohr.

 

“...I never really had the opportunity to learn.” That made her sad- she had probably been taken to Hoshido before Camilla had a chance to teach her. As monotonous as it was, sitting with her sister and learning how to sew and knit and embroider were some of her fondest memories. Even Azura deserved memories like that.

“Maybe one day, I can teach you.” The singer smiled at her, a small quirk of her lips, but genuine enough to reach her eyes.

“I would like that.” On that note, they both returned to camp, each lost in their own thoughts.

000

 

A/N- So I gave the avatar's in-game dialogue to lots of other people in this chapter, mostly because there's no way Nerr would spout such trope-y, shonen clichés or actually care about Ryouma, but also because everything Cornflakes says in this chapter is so stupid, it's a surprise those weren't Azura's lines. Nerr's spent her life being taught that Nohr has the strongest military in the world- she's not about to say, “Sure, we can take 'em!” And that scene in the tunnel where Scarlet punches the avatar in the back of the head (that's no little tap; it's clearly a closed-fist punch that sends the poor bastard stumbling) while Ryouma just watches (with silent pleasure, I'm sure)... Gzeus Cryst, do I dislike her...

And the battle... I _know_ it's a “Defeat the Commander” map, but the way it's set up, the only way to _not_ kill almost every enemy unit on it is to rush through it with a handful of fast, unarmed units that know Swap, and on anything but Normal, that's begging for death. I mean, I'm not the only one who thinks that the Dragon Vein on that map is REALLY violent, right? You're triggering a cave in to hurt all the soldiers that are just doing their jobs to make them easier to kill (and I shouldn't need to tell you what generally happens to people when buildings fall on them...). Jeez... Also, I love Charlotte and Benny so damn much that I had to make them central characters, even if it was just so they could die horrible deaths.


	11. Staggering Sad Days

000000000000

Ch. 11- “Staggering Sad Days”

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For several days, they walked with few pauses, heading north, keeping to wooded areas as often as possible. Ryouma consulted both maps and Scarlet, while Nerr would ask Jakob. Her retainer, a veritable cornucopia of knowledge, proudly declared that while she had been learning politics and battle strategies, he had been memorizing every inch of Nohr in case a situation like this ever arose. The princess was eternally grateful for his dedication, and made every effort to remind him of it, but it seemed the opportunity to laud him for his good work seemed to be coming less often. She often saw, not just Jakob, but Silas as well, talking to the Hoshidans. She could hardly hold it against them; they had been traveling together for about four months, it was only logical that they would seek out companionship. Silas often conversed with Suzukaze, and once or twice, she had even spied him talking to Ryouma, alarm bells going off in her head at once. She didn't want to pry into her friend's affairs- he was allowed to have his secrets- but she definitely made a mental note to be on alert after that. Likewise, though Jakob spoke to Oboro more often than she would have assumed considering her hatred of all things Nohrian, seeing Takumi talking to him once when they made camp struck her as odd. The didn't speak for a long time, but her steward said nothing of it to her afterwards.

 

Questions scratched incessantly at her mind, ' _what were they talking about?_ _'_ , but she forced them away. There was no point in thinking about it, no matter how mad it drove her. The worse thing about this newfound friendliness with the Hoshidans was not the suspicions it gave birth to, no... it was how lonely it made her feel. When last she'd seen Camilla and Leo, both of them had disparagingly referred to the other people as her “friends” but that was as far from the truth as one could get. Aside from a few, perfunctory words here and there, Nerr had not really spoken to any of the Hoshidans. They all either came across as rude, such as Hana and Oboro, or insipid, like Setsuna and Hayato. She didn't really feel like she could have an insightful conversation with them. More than once, she had thought about approaching her blood siblings, but something stayed her hand. If she were being honest with herself, she would have admitted it was dread. Dread that things would turn out the way they had when she'd tried speaking to Takumi weeks ago, that they would be cold and indifferent, or else, just launch into a tirade about how horrible she was for still feeling a connection with Nohr.

 

Her angry rant at Ryouma back in Chevalier had clearly not been forgotten, much less forgiven. Even Sakura now seemed to resent her for it, looking upset any time Nerr said two words to her. It wasn't as if she had been a social butterfly all her life; living in so remote a location meant that, for fifteen years, a grand total of ten people had made up the world's population to her. She only saw her brothers and sisters a few times a month, her father only once every few years, but... she had never felt shunned by them. She had never regretted being related to them... She had never known it was possible to be surrounded by people, and yet, feel so alone.

 

The Nohrian girl had begun to loathe the times when they had to make camp. When she was marching, when her legs were moving and the scenery was changing before her eyes, it was easy to stop thinking, but as soon as she stopped moving, her thoughts began grinding back to life like a rusty piece of machinery. Even the sanctuary of sleep had been corrupted, for when she wasn't tossing and turning as her eyes itched and she fought the urge to cry from being so tired but unable to rest, she was trapped in an endless loop of nightmares, trapped under mountains of decomposing corpses swarming with flies, their cloudy, sticky eyes wide and staring through her, damning her for continuing to live whilst they were dead.

 

Nerr tried to read on those horrid nights, shuffling away from camp until she could see by the light of the moon. _The Prideful Princess_ had always been her staple piece of literature, but... now, when she brushed her fingers over it's yellowed, dog-eared pages, the memories it dredged up were worse than the nightmares. Rather than reading, she would find herself staring at the page the cracked spine was open to until the tiny printed letters blurred together and she could feel the tears dripping from her chin. She always made sure to “read” late at night when everyone else was fast asleep, so no one could see her.

 

The days grew colder, and snow was beginning to fall with increasing regularity, growing deep enough on the ground that their feet left tracks in the snow, tracks that would make it easy for the royal army to follow them. Hinoka, Tsubaki and Yuugiri began trailing behind the regiment, brushing away the tracks with branches as, when they were mounted, they left no trails of their own. The Hoshidans complained ceaselessly of the cold weather- they were not accustomed to harsh winters that brought sudden blizzards and pelted them with freezing rain. All except for Rinkah who, as a member of the Flame tribe, had enough fire magic in her veins that the drastic drop in temperature did not bother her. Much to the heiress's disdain, once it had been discovered that she radiated heat as well, the oni found herself nearly constantly surrounded by chilly soldiers.

 

Nerr did not mind the cold, either. She felt it, she felt it terribly, shivering constantly, her bare feet raw and inflamed at the end of every day, but it felt _right_. After all, a massive stone structure like the Northern Citadel did not retain heat well. Despite Gunther and Jakob's best efforts to keep the fortress maintained, the ancient building had been falling apart, with ceilings that leaked when it rained and large cracks in the masonry that let in cold air with every breeze. Her room had been one of the worse offenders in in the castle, a double-edged sword for, although it was spacious and easily the most luxurious room the citadel had to offer, it was impossible to heat, with it's high ceiling and many windows and _no_ fireplace. Nerr spent most nights in winter sleeping in the kitchen, the cold, hard stone floor beside the mantle warmer than her plush bed. She trained every day in the winter, no matter how much snow was piled in the courtyard or on the roof, everyone berating her for not wearing shoes like a fool, but leaving her to her own devices. Any tissue damage she sustained healed by the next morning, so what was the bother? Besides, winter in the citadel had always been a time for enjoyment. Close to the holidays, after an hour or two of training, she and her fortress family would devolve from mock fights to snowball fights, Jakob, Lilith, Gunther and herself against Flora and Felicia- with their control of ice magic, it was evenly matched. The playful shrieks and laughter that echoed through the courtyard filled her dreams during those days, not the screams of the dying.

 

When the new year rolled around, they would write anonymous resolutions for one another, then spend the rest of the year trying to figure out who had written theirs. Sometimes they got doubles, but no one minded. Last year, she'd written Flora's, _Please take some time to relax_. Her own, _Do not push yourself so hard_ , had clearly come from Jakob- she recognized his neat slant anywhere. It didn't seem like there would be any resolutions this year; Nerr had overheard her Hoshidans sisters talking about some new year tradition _they_ had, with Sakura lamenting that they had already missed it and Hinoka assuring her that, once Garon was dealt with and they returned to Hoshido, they could do it then.

 

It was hard to believe that a new year had crept up on her, unnoticed. This time last year, she'd been working on knitting sweaters for her servants, and wondering how much longer it would take before she was a good enough solider to leave the citadel. Thinking about the flow of time depressed her, so she didn't. Instead, when the camp was set up and everyone took care of their weapons, or rested or spoke with their friends, she worked on her cape. She had finally been able to wash it, dunking it into a small stream they'd found to fill up their canteens with. The icy water numbed her hands and didn't do much for most of the stains (she was pretty sure Jakob used hot water to get her clothes clean), but it _felt_ cleaner. Once it had dried, she would find an isolated corner of the camp, and get to work, setting her straight pins and threading a needle.

 

The steady rhythm she developed, working the needle in and out of the dark faille, was pleasantly mind numbing. A few times, some of the Hoshidans took notice of her if they passed by, a few- notably Oboro and Hinoka- pausing for a bit to watch her work, but ultimately, no one approached her. Save Azura. One night, she had approached Nerr, standing in front of the other princess until she looked up, and asked if she could watch. The Nohrian girl had been tempted to make a quip reminding her that she had been doing that all the time, but she kept her sarcasm to herself, nodded mutely. The singer settled beside her and did as she had requested- watched. She did not attempt to start a conversation, for which Nerr was very grateful- these scant few hours she could salvage for herself were not to be used thinking, simply doing. It had taken two hours, stretched over the course of three days, but she'd finally finished, sewing the dark fabric back to the leather belt she wore around her shoulders. It only reached her hips, rather than fluttering around her ankles, but with it back in place, she felt a little better. Azura remarked that she was very skilled, but it was nothing to her. She demonstrated how easy sewing was by stitching shut a rip in the other girl's dress.

 

The songstress thanked her, remarking that usually, Oboro was the one who repaired everyone's clothes. It turned out the lancer's had come from a family of tailors that had been killed by Nohrian bandits. Nerr wondered if that was really the kind of information one should share about another person, but it seemed that it wasn't a secret. In fact, everyone seemed to believe that such a thing justified her hatred of Nohrians. The princess wasn't sure how she felt about that; after all, she'd lost someone incredibly dear to a Nohrian as well, but did she hate everyone associated with the country for the sins of one person? Then again, she wondered how she would've felt had that murderer been Hoshidan... Thinking about Hans and Gunther made her feel sick to her stomach, but it also reminded her of something else she'd wanted to do. When next they made camp, she found herself a secluded spot and pulled her sewing kit out once more. Setting it in her lap, she retrieved the black fragment and pulled her handkerchief from it's usual place in her brassiere. Her throat tightened as she looked between the two pieces of cloth. The small scrap, while still dark, was significantly faded. Swallowing hard, she placed it over the larger square, so it's corner lined up with the corner she'd already begun embroidering. The patterns, though done at different skill levels, still matched up almost perfectly. Sniffling slightly, she unrolled a spool of black thread. She made the stitches as small as possible when she sewed the two pieces of fabric together, so that it appeared almost seamless. She was so concentrated on her work that she didn't notice Azura approaching her until the songstress spoke up.

 

“You're further from camp than usual, Nerr.” Startling slightly, the Nohrian princess jabbed her finger with the needle. Her hands were calloused from years of swordplay, but the thin silver point pierced deep enough to draw a large bead of blood. “Oh! Goodness, I'm sorry.”

“It's fine.” She said simply, sticking her finger in her mouth. The sweet, metallic tang made her mouth water, but the tiny hole had closed almost instantaneously, allowing no more blood to flow. She pulled her now healed appendage out and showed it to Azura. “See? Fine.” The blunette woman sighed a bit.

“Well, that's good. I was wondering if I could watch you sew again today- I noticed you're doing something different, but...” She trailed off, taking note of the black cloth in Nerr's hand, consternation filling her eyes. She had seen the Nohrian girl's reaction when Lilith gave her the unhappy keepsake- perhaps she didn't want to be around if she devolved into another fit of hysteria. That wasn't likely to happen; she was too tired for theatrics.

 

“You can watch if you want. But I have to admit, I don't know what you get out of it. It must be pretty boring for you to just sit there and watch me sew.”

“I feel like you can use the company. You look lonelier than usual these days, Nerr.” Well, she certainly didn't mince words. Nerr remained silent, letting the singer take that as she would, resuming her stitching. Azura took her usual place beside the other girl, but unlike the last few days, she did not watch her hands as they pushed the needle through. In fact, she seemed to be pointedly looking away from the handkerchief, as if it were something private. It was, in a way, but no one else knew that, so she really didn't care who saw it. It was just a scrap of cloth to them. The songstress surprised her by speaking up quietly this time. “...were you ever lonely in Nohr?” Well... that certainly seemed to come out of the blue.

 

“Maybe a bit. Probably a lot, but... it never bothered me.”

“How could being lonely not bother you?” She had to think about that for a while. It seemed like an odd thing to say.

“Well... I guess it's similar to when you get hungry between breakfast and dinner. Your stomach growls and it's irritating at the time, but the second you start to eat again, you forget about it. It's like that. Sometimes, when I was all by myself, I would start to feel lonely, but then I would see one of my servants or retainers, or one of my siblings would come to visit, and I'd forget anything was ever wrong.” Both women fell silent for a while, before Azura spoke up again.

 

“I've always thought of Nohr as nothing but a cruel, evil place where no one could ever be happy. When I was brought to Hoshido, it was like waking up from a bad dream, but... sometimes I felt guilty about being so happy there.”

“Why?” That was baffling to Nerr; why would someone feel bad about being happy?

“Well, because I was only there because you weren't. Sometimes, especially when I saw Mikoto-sama or Hinoka crying, I would feel terrible; it was as though I was free only because you had taken my place in that hellhole. I was basking in the happiness and love that should've been yours.” So many parts of that sentence were beyond her ken. Hinoka _crying?_ Yes, she had seen the eldest Hoshidan princess cry once, in the snowy north of Hoshido, but that had seemed like a moment of temporary insanity. Azura made it seem like the red-haired girl had cried often. Love? Happiness? In _Hoshido?_ Heh, not likely... The draconic princess shook her head.

 

“You have nothing to be upset about, Azura. If you were happy in Hoshido, then I'm glad for you, because I was very happy in Nohr.”

“But you were locked up! You were confined to a prison, like a caged animal...” She trailed off, perhaps realizing how harsh her words sounded. She shied back a bit. “Jakob told me...” She murmured apologetically, and Nerr frowned.

“ 'Prison'? 'Caged animal'? I had no idea he hated the place so much...” She would've thought he'd look back on their old home with the same nostalgia she did, but given that he used to scrub it's floors, that might have been a stretch. Still, it painted her happy memories a shade darker to know that he disliked living there so. “Well, Jakob might have thought of it as a prison, but not me. It was more like... a quarantine.”

 

“A what?” She did not blame the singer for sounding confused.

“You may or may not remember me telling Ryouma a while ago how impossible his plan to get in the castle was. When I said every Hoshidan who got close to the Northern Citadel where I lived was killed, that wasn't entirely true. _Most_ of them were apprehended and killed, but a long time ago, over a decade... one got closer. I don't really remember it; I heard the story second hand from Jakob and--” Inhaling deeply, she calmed herself, recalling the harrowing ordeal she had informed of. “They said it was an assassin; I know now that it was probably someone sent to try and bring me back to Hoshido, but then... Knowing that someone could sneak into your room and murder you in your sleep is a terrifying thing for a child.”

 

“That's terrifying for anyone!”

“You have a point. Anyway, my-- my caretaker at the time apprehended the supposed assassin. That was one of the few times King Garon ever came out to see me. I mean, I didn't see _him_ , I woke up days later. I was told the weapon the Hoshidan used had some kind of poison that would kill me because my body was too weak to endure the effects of it. Father-- ...he said he cast an enchantment on me that would keep me alive, but only if I stayed in the citadel. When I was stronger and he didn't have to worry about me dropping dead on the spot, I could come live at the castle with the rest of my family...” Nerr didn't realize how much that memory hurt to recall until her throat choked up. Stupid- how _stupid_ she had been, believing his lies... He probably _had_ put some kind of enchantment on her; to seal her memories so the sight of a Hoshidan wouldn't cause her to remember anything about her blood family. She _had_ those memories, they were just buried deep, under a lifetime of other memories. Sniffling, she wiped her eyes a bit.

 

“Gods, don't ever tell Ryouma about that. He'll never shut up if he finds out- he'll swear I'm cursed and that's why I still think I'm Nohrian... I'm not cursed... I'm just a stupid child that wanted to believe her father actually cared about her...” A small hand touched her arm gently.

“You're not stupid, Nerr. I think... I think somewhere, deep in his heart, King Garon must have cared for you, even if it was just a little bit. And I think you know that, too- that's why I still hear you calling him 'Father' even though it's clear as day you detest him. If he truly wanted you to be a prisoner, you would not have had retainers or servants; you wouldn't have known the other royals, much less have been brought up to think of them as your siblings. They certainly wouldn't have thought of you as _their_ siblings if their father didn't tell them to.”

 

As foolish and naïve a thing it was to hope for, Nerr's heart lurched at the hope that maybe Azura was right, that she was ever so slightly more than just a faceless pawn to the king. Did that forgive any of the things he'd done? Of course not. Did it inspire her to hate him any less? Not in the slightest. But... it made her feel just a tiny bit better. Maybe her childhood _hadn't_ been a complete lie, maybe his wretched plan was recent. Perhaps, between kidnapping her for whatever reason- to keep her mother from retaliating, she assumed- and deciding she'd be more use to him dead, Garon had felt some sort of affection for her, like a pet maybe. It was pitiful and degrading, but she would take it.

000

 

The next morning, she woke up before most everyone else in the camp, chilled to the bone and shivering violently. Though she wore her paltry clothing layered, she slept further from the center of camp, and thus, further from the warming campfires, than anyone else. Anyone else would probably have succumbed to hypothermia had they tried to imitate her living conditions, but hidden within her frail, human shell was a dragon, and they did not die easily. Sitting up, her shoulders painfully stiff, Nerr got up as quickly an quietly as she could, grabbing her bag and trying her Yato's scabbard to her sword belt. She approached the edge of the forest they resided in, the snow blanketing the ground growing thicker as the trees grew less densely packed. It had snowed all night, and even now, she could see flurries against the rich navy of the sky. The few steeds their forces had (it was was strange that she was considering the Hoshidans part of her group as of late) were tied to the trees where there were still some patches of frozen grass, thick blankets covering them. Yuugiri's strange, avian mount (a Hoshidan beast known as a Golden Kite, apparently) had puffed up it's golden feathers and tucked it's slim head under one of it's massive wings. Likewise, the two pegasi had also fluffed their wings as well.

 

Stooping down, the princess pulled a hunk of frozen grass free from it's roots, approaching Silas' sorrel destrier. She held the proffered treat out with her palm flat; Gunther had taught her that years ago, always keep your palm flat unless you weren't particularly attached to your fingers. Plavo sniffed the grass, and took it from her in one bite. Nerr gently rubbed the horse's neck, it's warmth comforting in the cold. She missed Caractacus, her retainer's old charger. It felt silly to admit that she missed a horse, but it was true. He had been the first horse she learned to ride. Her short, five year old legs couldn't even reach the stirrups of the saddle, but she had been so excited. Gunther had always warned her that the massive black gelding was an ornery thing, but she never believed it. Caractacus had always been a sweetheart, as far as she was concerned, affectionately chewing at her hair when she visited the stables. She missed Pollux and Bravane as well, but the war horse always held a special place in her heart, just as his rider did. Shutting her eyes, she let her head fall forward, resting it against Plavo's neck as well, inhaling the familiar scent of warm fur and animal sweat. Homesickness had a way of creeping up on her. Nerr turned the moment she heard feet crunching in the snow behind her, the person walking still a bit away. She tensed as she saw Hinoka's red hair, and the Hoshidan princess paused when she finally noticed her sister standing there.

 

“Oh. Nerrida. I didn't think I'd find you out here. You usually wind up in the place people are _least_ likely to find you.” Pulling away from the horse, Nerr set her jaw.

“Don't worry. I'm not staying.” She had just begun to walk away when Hinoka trotted forward, blocking her way.

“W-wait. You don't have to go. ...I'm sorry, I didn't mean for it to come out like that.” The older woman looked down awkwardly, before reaching into the saddlebag she'd brought with her and pulling out a brush. “I was just going to groom Kinka before we had to pack up. I have an extra brush...?” She said, invitation hanging in the air. Nerr could have ignored her and continued walking away, but... Constantly ducking these people who were supposed to be her family was growing exhausting.

 

She nodded quietly, holding out her hand. Hinoka gave her the brush she held, before grabbing the spare for herself. Silently, the sisters worked, Hinoka brushing her own steed while she worked on the destrier's coat. The Nohrian girl was not used to associating sisters with silence. Camilla and Elise were the type of people who would talk endlessly about nothing at all, and be effortlessly charming while doing so. But it wasn't that the other princess was the strong, silent type; Nerr saw her speak to almost everyone else in their regiment, at length. No, it seemed she only clammed up when her younger sister was around. That was alright; she wasn't going to force anyone to talk to her if they didn't feel the need to. Elise would be on her third or fourth conversation topic by now... She was so caught up in thinking about her sisters that she didn't notice the one beside her speaking until she had finished.

 

“Huh? What?”

“I said, you're really good at that. I'm a little surprised.” Good at-- oh, she probably meant grooming. Nerr shrugged slightly.

“I grew up around horses.” It was a simple, honest answer, but she could feel the tension in the air. She knew exactly what Hinoka had tacked onto the end of that sentence in her own mind; _I grew up around horses_ _ **in Nohr**_. The silence that fell over them again was heavier now as they continued their grooming.

 

“...do you ride?”

“A bit. Not too well; nothing faster than a canter.”

“Hm.” More silence. “...who taught you?”

“I don't think you really want to know the answer to that.”

“Wha--” Nerr glared at the other woman, gripping the brush in her hand so tightly, she felt the wood crack.

 

“Stop it, Hinoka. Stop trying to make small talk with me. I can _smell_ you fuming over there; everything I'm saying is infuriating you, admit it!”

“It's not--”

“It _is!_ Just admit it! You can't _stand_ that my life in Nohr wasn't as terrible as you thought it was.” The older princess stared at her for a long time, before looking away, back to her pegasus. She was about to storm off when a quiet, pain-filled voice responded to her demand.

 

“You're right. I hate it. I hate that every time you mention Nohr, your eyes light up. I hate that whatever memories they brainwashed you with were better than the memories you had of us. I hate that they convinced you that this hellhole is better than your home with us...!”

“...what were you hoping for, Hinoka?” She asked the other woman in a whisper. “Were you hoping that King Garon locked me away in a dark dungeon full of rats? That they starved me, only feeding me what scraps were too putrid for the dogs? That they beat me black and blue? Is that what you wanted? Were you hoping the evil royals raped me and used my blood for their demonic rituals--”

 

“Stop it!” Hinoka dropped her brush in the snow, covering her ears with her hands. Her shoulders shook as she cried silently. “Please, Nerrida, stop... Don't you get it? For years, that's exactly what I _thought_ happened! I thought that if they hadn't killed you, they were making you wish they had. Every day, I woke up thinking, 'what were they doing to you?', and every night when I went to sleep, I wondered if you would wake up the next morning. And when you finally came back and didn't recognize us, all I could think was, they did it; those bastards finally broke you!” She hung her head, weeping bitterly. Nerr watched her cry in silence. Did the others think like that, too? Did Azura tell them horror stories about Nohr, or was that simply the age-old slander at work? Still... she could empathize with the other princess if nothing else. That must have been a terrible burden to live with. She could not imagine how her mother must have felt, wondering every day what her child was enduring. She swallowed hard past the lump in her throat.

 

“...but they didn't, Hinoka. They didn't break me, and they didn't brainwash me. My brothers and sisters were the most loving, wonderful family I could ever dream of. They did everything in their power to ensure my life was happy. ... ...I remember that dark dungeon...” The cold, bitter darkness that had haunted her nightmares for years when she was child... But she also remembered the heavy, iron door opening and the smiling knight standing there, bringing with him warmth and light... “Shouldn't you be _happy_ that I have some better memories, too? That my life _wasn't_ the living hell you thought it was?”

 

Hinoka didn't respond, put into a complex moral dilemma. She couldn't very well acknowledge that she should be grateful to the people who destroyed her family, but to deny it would be admitting she secretly wished her younger sister had been raped and tortured if only because it would make her hate the people who destroyed her family... As far as Nerr was concerned, though, there was no quandary; bad people could do good things, just as good people could do bad things. Zola had betrayed her after she had shown him kindness, but he still saved Takumi's life, regardless of the reasons. Xander was the best big brother she could ask for, but he defended a murderer like a coward. She contradicted herself many times- she was large, she contained multitudes. People were complicated; the world wasn't black and white. More steps crunched towards them, and she looked up to see Ryouma approaching them.

 

Bile burned her gut at the sight of him. Another example of complexity. The high prince seemed like a good brother to his other siblings, and a fair leader to his soldiers, but he was also brash, foolish and utterly contemptuous of her. Breathing sharply through her nose, Nerr walked over and dropped her brush back into the saddle bag, turning back towards the camp. Everyone else was probably waking up as well. She tried to avoid Ryouma, she specifically walked in a wide arc to avoid him, but the prince still somehow ended up in front of her. He wasn't glowering at her, his not face exactly open, but calmer than it usually was. By all accounts, he looked like a normal, big brother, but all she could see when she looked up at him was the border guard convulsing as he died slowly and painfully. Raijinto was tied at his hip, sheathed and appearing innocuous enough, but the only purpose it had was to make people suffer. Only a monster could be chosen to wield something like that.

 

“Nerrida. Since you're up and we have some time before we break camp, I'd like to--”

“No.” She scooted around him and continued on her way, not stopping as Ryouma called out to her.

“I wanted to ask you--”

“Ask Scarlet!” With that, she broke into a run, wanting to get away from both Hoshidan royals as quickly as possible. It had been a while since she'd ran, since she'd had the opportunity. Even though she was surrounded by nothing by open space, danger could be lurking around every bend, and she didn't know the area. Jakob knew every nook and cranny, but he was exhausted, despite always appearing effortlessly put together. She couldn't ask him to further exert himself just because she had pent up energy.

 

As tired as she always was, her muscles seemed to tingle and itch, and sometimes, she found herself squirming uncontrollably, desperate for _some_ type of movement. For ten years, she'd spent every morning running laps- her body craved it. But there was nothing that could be done about it. So she simply enjoyed the sprint back to camp, wishing it was further away so she didn't have to stop so soon. Everyone was bustling about, doing last minute checks of their weapons and gear, or packing up their blankets. Jakob and Oboro, of all people, were cooking something over the fire in the middle of camp, with Yuugiri chopping vegetables to hand to them. They had taken some foodstuffs from the rebel safe house in Chevalier since their rations from Hoshido had finally run completely out, meaning that now, they were well and truly eating Nohrian food. Nerr should have been glad- in her mind, she savored the smell of polenta, but physically, it turned her stomach. The princess covered her mouth with her hand, trying to fight back the wave of nausea. Normally when she felt sick to her stomach, breathing deeply helped, but now that the smell of the air was the source of her malaise, there was no help there. Sakura approached her slowly, shuffling her feet through the dirty slush that now encrusted their campground. She looked uncomfortable, and Nerr was tempted to just walk away to spare the girl the awkwardness.

 

“Um... n-nee-sama? Are you... not feeling well?” Swallowing, she lowered her hand a bit.

“I'm just a bit nauseous, that's all. I'm fine.”

“O-oh! I have something that can h-help with that, I think...” The younger girl reached into the pocket of her skirt, pulling out a handful of candies wrapped in white paper. Hesitantly, a nervous look in her eyes, she handed them to her older sister. Nerr took them in her cupped hand, untwisting the wrapper on one of them to reveal...

 

“Peppermints.” It had been a long time since she'd seen the small, red and white balls. Sakura nodded.

“Um, Ryouma nii-sama gave them to me back in Chevalier. He said they're a kind of candy, but Jakob-san said they're a remedy for upset stomach.”

“They're both right. They're made from a plant that has a lot of medicinal purposes.” Nerr might not have been the aspiring physician her retainer was, but she'd been treated with menthol enough times to know about it. Back in the citadel, she always carried peppermints with her, relishing their taste, but also using them to self medicate her churning gut every time she got word that her father was sending Xander to check on her progress. She popped the candy into her mouth, relaxing a bit. If nothing else, the nostalgia brought on by the familiar taste made her feel a bit better. Sakura smiled a bit, delighted by this new information; as a healer, she was probably interested in any way to treat people. Elise always loved rattling off the new folk remedies she was learning.

 

“Wow... Nohr has a-amazing plants, doesn't it?” She frowned a bit, and Nerr wondered if she was regretting having praised the enemy country. Surprisingly- or perhaps, not so surprisingly; Sakura alone of her siblings did not seem to view Nohr with overt animosity- the girl's expression looked more concerned than upset as she looked back up to her sister. “Wh-why are you nauseous, nee-sama? Is it th-the smell of the food? Do you not like it? I think I m-might still have some dried peaches from Hoshido; I know I shouldn't be h-hiding food, but...” That was... sweet. Very sweet. As mean and cold as Nerr had been to the Hoshidan girl, she was still offering to share her own provisions with her... If no one could make her feel guilty, Sakura could.

 

“I'm sure no one would begrudge you keeping a treat for yourself as long as there are other provisions. And I appreciate your concern, Sakura, but you don't need to worry about me. I'm fine, really. ...I don't know why the smell is making me sick. I grew up eating this, for the gods sake!” She could not keep the frustration from her voice. The Nohrian girl had never been a picky eater; she couldn't afford to be. When the trail leading from the citadel was impassible during blizzards and their supplies ran out, the residents had to be grateful for every crumb they could scavenge. Gunther had been good at scrounging up meals from nothing. He had told her that he had lived through two famines, once as a child and once as a soldier. “Beggars cannot be choosers,” he would always say as he set bowls of “mystery stew” as Felicia dubbed it in front of them. She'd seen him in the kitchen, skinning a rat once, several more in a bucket at his feet. The horrid vermin terrified her when she heard them skittering in the walls at night, but when the only alternative was waste away from hunger, she tamped her fear down and asked if she could help (the horrid things had surprisingly soft fur, it turned out). Rats, insects, tree bark- she'd put anything and everything in her mouth and swallow with no complaint, so why was actual _food_ making her ill suddenly? Sakura cringed at her outburst, but did not shy away.

 

“M-maybe it's because you're a dragon? Some a-animals can't eat certain things; Golden Kites can't eat rice, y-you know.” She did _not_ know that, but that didn't make sense either.

“But I've been a dragon all my life- I might not have _transformed_ before, but you don't go to sleep as a human and wake up a manakete.”

“Hmm... Maybe when we get back to Hoshido, you should see a ph-physician in Izumo.” The younger princess seemed to forget that Nerr had no intention of returning to Hoshido with them, but she did not have the heart to remind her of that now. She just nodded, crossing her arms over her chest.

 

“Maybe. And this is the worst, because I _like_ polenta!”

“I-is that what it's called? Takumi nii-sama just called it gruel.”

“...loathe as I am to admit it, he's not wrong. But gruel is what orphans in workhouses eat; polenta is delicious. That's one of our staples in Nohr. We always ate it with milk for breakfast back home, or with eisbein, or mushrooms.”

“Wow... oh, th-that must have been pretty unpleasant for you...”

 

“Huh?” Those words threw her for a loop. Was the girl assuming eating Nohrian food was unpleasant? No, her voice sounded too sympathetic to be taking a jab... “What do you mean?”

“H-having to eat mushrooms. I know you don't like them.” Well _that_ was something she hadn't been expecting to hear.

“...who told you I don't like mushrooms, Sakura?”

 

“Hinoka nee-sama.” The healer answered briskly. “The day you came back home, wh-when you saved us from the Faceless, Mother planned a b-big feast to-- to celebrate your return. Hinoka nee-sama told the cooks not to make any mushrooms because she said y-you always hated them. F-father didn't like it when you didn't clean your plate, s-so she always ate them for you. ...that was b-before I was born...” Those words sank in Nerr's stomach like bricks.

 

The first day she arrived in Shirasagi... She had tried to return to Nohr twice that day, even after she'd been apprehended the first time and Ryouma set sentries at the doors. She hadn't let that deter her. She'd actually managed to run down to the floor below before being overwhelmed by guards trying to keep her imprisoned. She hadn't gone down without a fight, though, biting and scratching and kicking and probably breaking a few noses. Mikoto had run up with a strange rod in her hands, waving it with a tormented look in her eyes. The next thing Nerr knew, she had woken up back in her old room the next morning, feeling as though she'd drunk a washtub of beer the night before. Had they still enjoyed their celebratory feast, even while the guest of honor was out cold? She clenched her hands into tight fists, the candy crinkling in her palm.

 

“Hinoka is mistaken. I love mushrooms; they're one of my favorite things to eat.”

“Bu-but, she said--”

“Sakura.” The Nohrian girl's voice was terse, but marked with an effort to remain gentle. “Hinoka's memories are of a young child from fifteen years ago. I _think_ I would know myself a little better than someone else would, don't you agree?” The young princess nodded slowly, looking dispirited.

 

“I-I suppose you're right...”

“Of course I am.” Hesitating for a breath's span, Nerr reached out with her free hand, resting it atop her sister's pink hair. “From now on, instead of taking other people's presumptions about me at face value, just come directly to me, and we'll get everything straightened out, okay?” Sakura looked up, her eyes wide, uncertain, but hopeful.

“Oh, b-but nee-sama, wouldn't I be b-bothering you?”

“Of course not. I can make time for you; I'm a good big sister.” The younger girl laughed slightly, delighted.

 

“I would love that! Th-thank you, nee-sama!” Seeing that smiling face beaming up at her made her feel much better. It had been so long since she'd seen anyone smile like that, at her, because of her... so long since she felt like a good big sister. She wanted to reach down and pull Sakura into a hug, her heart and soul longed for the simple, sororal affection she'd been lacking since arriving in Hoshido, but the heavy footsteps coming ever closer behind her gave her pause. She could smell Ryouma, smell his frustration, and cursed the gods for denying her even one tiny moment of unsullied peace. The pink haired girl, by contrast, perked up even more at the sight of her eldest sibling.

 

“Ryouma nii-sama. Is everything alright?” The prince smiled at his little sister, falling into the role of a kind older brother easily.

“Of course. We're going to be setting off once more, so make sure you're fully packed and gather your retainers, Sakura.”

“Okay. I'll talk to you later, Nerrida nee-sama!” With a quick bow, she turned and dashed away, in search of her retainers. Leaving Nerr alone with the crimson beast. She did not turn around to face him- perhaps he would get the idea that she had nothing to say to him and simply leave her alone. Of course, what she wanted never had, and most likely never would, matter to him.

 

“So, you're at least speaking to your siblings. That's good.” A remark was on the tip of her tongue, about him wasting his time just to praise her for that, but she pressed her lips together tightly to keep from being tempted to speak. “Takumi expressed concern the other day about your lack of shoes. From what I've heard, it will get colder the further north we head. In the next village we reach that doesn't have an overwhelming military presence, we'll have to get you some. You and Azura, both.” If she focused on anything but Ryouma's voice, she could see the ice crystals in the slush at her feet breaking down as it melted. The prince behind her sighed deeply. “You can't ignore me forever, Nerrida.” _'Yes, I can...'_ The words, an instinctive reflex, jumped in her throat so quickly, she had already opened her mouth by the time she realized what was happening. Oh, he thought he was being _so_ clever, didn't he? Well, not clever enough. Deciding to give him a visual clue of just how long she could ignore him, the Nohrian girl began walking away. Maybe she could help Silas with his saddle or something. It should have come as no surprise that Ryouma was following her, looming over her like some overly conspicuous shadow, but it was still irksome.

 

“Regardless of your motives, we are fighting this war together. We are allies, however unwillingly. And, despite how you may feel about it, I am your brother. It would benefit everyone, yourself most of all, if you would just let us in- let _me_ in.” Let him in? No. No, he had done nothing _worthy_ of being let into her heart. Xander, for all his current faults, had spent fifteen years being her doting older brother, doing everything in his power to make her life a little better. As angry as she was for his newly exposed cowardice and callosity, her heart still resonated with the goodness she knew was in him. She had known Ryouma for a little over a month, and in that time, he had done nothing but exemplify the horrible things she had heard about Hoshidans. Leaving his family without any hint of his condition to play at being a rebel with some traitorous slut, trying to make her choose between the family she knew and the strangers she didn't, refusing to let her go back home, threatening to have her killed if she didn't believe his lies... Was this not what he thought of when he looked back on their brief interactions? Had he somehow twisted those events so that he appeared a righteous hero and defender of all things good and just in his mind's eye? The agitation in her gut hurt, like a long needle being thrust into her. She picked up her pace. He was still talking.

 

“Very well. I won't push you anymore for now. But I have one last thing to say.” With two long strides, the high prince had cut in front of her, blocking her escape. His ever present frown was firmly in place, but his dark eyes seemed more searching than upset. He held out a dark piece of cloth. “You dropped this, sister. Last night, when you went to sleep. I'd have thought nothing of it, but I've often seen you slaving over it when we make camp, so I figured it must be rather important.” Nerr's eyes widened as her breath caught in her throat. Her handkerchief. She hadn't even realized she'd dropped it- she had been utterly exhausted, and thought she'd tucked it back into her brassiere, but apparently not. Even upon waking, she hadn't realized it wasn't there. She might have marched for miles without noticing, and then what would she have done? Well, clearly, she'd have run back, but what if she couldn't find it? She snatched it from her brother's hand, tracing the shimmering needlework with a trembling finger. Breathing deeply, the Nohrian girl pressed it against her chest, willing herself to calm.

 

“...thank you, Ryouma.” The Hoshidan man seemed please by this first, tiny step.

“Of course, Nerrida. Perhaps one day, you might tell me what--”

“ **No.** ” He was pushing his luck and seemed to realize that, backing away slightly with both hands raised in defeat.

 

“Very well. It was worth a shot.” With that last thought hanging in the air, he turned and walked away, presumably to find his own retainers. Nerr remained where she was, rubbing the slightly damp cloth between her fingers, reminded of what she had thought of whilst speaking to Hinoka earlier. People were complex. Bad, mean people could easily do nice things. If nothing else, she was grateful for that.

000

 

A/N- So, lots of backstory, bonding, and angst. Nerr didn't brood so much in 'The Rising Dark', but that was because she had people she was close to to keep her preoccupied (not to mention, a certain someone had come back into her life by this time). Unlike that story, where I used the in-game supports as jumping off points for character bonding, I went completely off that tangent in 'The Falling Light'. The reason is simple- the avatar's supports with their Hoshido siblings are either them wanting to know about what they missed in Hoshido (Hinoka/ Ryouma) or bending over backwards to try and get them to open up (Sakura/ Takumi). Nerr would give herself a shotgun lobotomy before she ran up to Ryouma and said, “Nii-san! Tell me about my super-duper awesome family!” Also, I really needed to give a reason for why Hinoka's still so hateful towards the Nohrians even though she sees how “well-adjusted” her sister turned out after being raised by them.

A long time before I started this fic, and 'The Road Not Trekked' in general, I had been working on a story that was meant to be a prequel to it set when Nerr was first brought to Nohr as a POW. I base a lot of her backstory on _that_ story, which I'm honestly not sure will ever see the light of the internet (not to mention, I stopped a quarter of the way through to work on 'TRNT'). But yeah, I've been trying to stretch out her backstory between both forks of The Road Not Trekked, so you never really get the whole story in either one. _I_ feel like that's the proper way to make each route interesting, but I think I'm just stroking my own ego at this point.


	12. The Burden of Groundless Blame

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Ch.12- “The Burden of Groundless Blame”

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The snow was beginning to fall thicker and more often. If they went any further north, they'd have to start fighting through blizzards soon. Nohr was not in the dire straits it _could_ have been, given the bread shortage, but the blanket of soft white did not cover the misery of the country. More than once, the small band of soldiers had been accosted by bandits, mistaking them for traveling merchants, perhaps. Their thin faces and sunken eyes spoke more of a hunger for food than money, but they had to be beaten back all the same, or so Ryouma claimed. It would do them no good to run to the nearest border guard and tell them that the Hoshidan army had just passed through the area. They did not kill them, simply binding them and leaving them by the side of the road. Hunger and the elements could do a good enough job of that. While they had been walking, one of Hinoka's retainers, Setsuna, tripped over something in a snowbank. Given that the archer rarely seemed to watch where she was going, that was hardly surprising, but what gave everyone pause was the small, blue hand sticking out of fluffy powder. Takumi's first reaction was that they should just keep marching and forget they saw anything, but a macabre curiosity welled up inside Nerr, and she found herself brushing away the snow.

 

A little boy, no older than five, lay curled in a tiny ball, his eyes half open. Stick-like limbs stuck out from the holes in his ragged clothes. When the weather got cold and the food became scarce, the very old and very young were always the first to go, Leo had told her. Even Oboro looked disquieted by the discovery, her usual glare reserved for Nohrians conspicuously absent; maybe she just thought the only good Nohrian was a dead one. The princess found herself clasping her hands together, as if in prayer, though she did not know any off the top of her head. She had never been a religious person. Scarlet surprised her, walking over and peeling the cloak from her shoulders to lay it over the tiny, frozen body. Silently, a somber mood now hanging over the group's heads, they began marching again. Nerr wondered how many other bodies were buried under the snow, how many frozen graves had they walked past? Jakob informed her, sometime later and in a quiet voice, that they were once again approaching civilization. With cities came borders, which came with border guards and more soldiers. She had wanted to ask Silas if he could maybe scout ahead a bit- of all of them, he and Scarlet looked the least likely to attract attention from other soldiers.

 

To her surprise, Suzukaze approached her, asking if he might humbly put his services to use. Why didn't he go ask Ryouma? Clearly, the Hoshidan heir was the one in charge. Kaze explained that if the prince wanted someone to survey something, he would ask his own retainers. Well, the ninja _was_ quiet enough that he could more often than not even catch _her_ unawares, so Nerr agreed. All that was left was to wait for his return. Ryouma had pulled out a map, and was currently frowning at it as he turned it this way and that. She almost laughed at the sight, a tight, badly repressed smile pulling at her lips. It was highly unlikely the next emperor of Hoshido could not read a map... but she certainly enjoyed _thinking_ that was the case. It felt good, if not a little shameful, to smile after the horror and sadness of the day. Suzukaze, as his name apparently suggested, returned fleet as the wind, his youthful face dark as he approached the Nohrian girl. Taking note of it as well, Ryouma extracted himself from his siblings and approached as well, staying a respectful distance away, but still close enough to hear.

 

“Well? What is it, Suzukaze? On a scale from 'a lot' to 'very', just how badly are we screwed?” The green-haired ninja crossed his arms over his chest. With his purple scarf pulled up over his nose and eyes closed, he looked remarkably like his brother. It had come as a great shock to Nerr discover they were _twins_ , but then again, Flora and Felicia looked nothing alike, either.

“I don't believe anyone is aware of our precise location, but... it seems the Nohrian army has moved to block all possible routes inland. Even the back roads and trails- they've left no outlet open. There seems to be hundreds of them, thousands even, amassing in this general area.” She sighed deeply. Nohr wasn't proud of it's military strength for nothing. Xander had told her once, his voice and eyes full of pride, that their army could blot out the sun if they were so inclined. When she had aspired to join that army, those words filled her with awe. Now, they left her with cold fear.

 

“Well, thank you, Suzukaze, for taking on such a dangerous scouting mission. Had I known there were _this_ many people out for our blood, I wouldn't have let you go alone.”

“My safety is of the least import, Nerrida-sama. But I feel I must ask; how would you go about getting past such an impossible obstacle? It doesn't seem there's another route we can take...” How... that was a question for the ages. Oh, if only Leo were there with her- he would have an answer for this predicament in the time it took her to sort the facts in her mind. She could just see him, rolling his eyes and telling her how stupid she was for not seeing such an obvious solution... then she's take his strategy books and put them on the high shelf, out of his reach. Perhaps her wistful sorrow showed on her face, or maybe it was just perceived as distress, but either way, both Ryouma and Jakob had approached her by that time.

 

“That's not entirely true, Kaze. Technically speaking, it seems possible to reach the mainland via Mount... Cruh... Neen... No...?” The high prince's brows furrowed deeply in confusion, half hidden behind his crimson face plates. Once again, he began turning the map, his frustration mounting as he looked at some apparently vexing landmark. “Crih-- gods damn it! This language is only meant to be spoken by people with forked tongues!” Grabbing the map from her blood brother lest he tear it to shreds in anger, Nerr looked it over, squinting a bit to make out the tiny text. She could only see one mountain who's name began with the letter “C”.

 

“Mount Crninoćnivuk.” She said easily. Both Kaze and Ryouma stared at her as though she had just uttered a demonic curse.

“Could you repeat that, milady? Perhaps in a manner capable of being spoken by us mere mortals?”

“Crninoćnivuk. It roughly means something along the lines of, 'Dark Wolf's Night' or some nonsense.” The eldest Hoshidan sibling blinked slowly.

“...okay, I'll take your word for it. Anyway, when Scarlet was showing me this map, she said it's called the 'Impassable Peak' by locals.”

“And did you ever stop to think perhaps there was a good reason for that, Lord Ryouma?” Jakob spoke up, rather forcefully.

 

“What do you mean, Jakob?”

“What I mean, milady, is that we might fare better against ten thousand Nohrian soldiers out in the open.” His voice dropped down to a tense whisper. “Mount Crninoćnivuk is where the Garou live!” Garou? Oh yes, she recalled reading about them, mostly in books of fantastical beasts and where they were once found. She wanted to tease her retainer for being afraid of big bad wolf-men, but if manaketes existed, then it was possible for anything else to exist too, she supposed. But those books were still hokum- they made everything in their ancient pages seem darker and more grisly than it truly was. After all, she had not gone on any uncontrollable killing rampages. Nerr chewed on her lip.

 

“Alright, so that's clearly a downside... and I'll bet you anything the army knows it full well. Suzukaze.” She held the map out for him to see, pointing to their general location. “We're here. Did you see any troops around _this_ area?” She pointed near the base of the mountain, and the ninja shook his head.

“Not a one, milady. I thought it was perhaps because there was no path through that mountain, but now I'm starting to believe that was intentional.”

 

“It sure was; that's exactly where they're funneling us. They'll probably start closing in on us in a day or two.” Ryouma crossed his arms over his chest, looking dour. “Our options are stay here and do nothing, or trek up this mountain and hope for the best. What say you, Nerrida?”

“Personally, I would take my chances with the Garou.”

“The _what?_ ” It was clear from the look on his face, that was another word he had no comprehension of. Just what had Scarlet been teaching him all this time, she was tempted to taunt. Jakob, ever a wellspring of information, clued the prince in.

 

“Garou are the race of shape shifters that reside atop the mountain. They transform into fearsome, wolf-like creatures that have a reputation for eating human flesh.” The butler shuddered slightly, and Nerr rolled her eyes.

“You shouldn't believe everything you read in books, Jakob. Remember what Gunther told us; wolves are rarely, if ever, antagonistic towards humans.” The words spilled from her lips so quickly, she didn't even realize what she had said until she noticed the change in Jakob's expression. It was slight, barely noticeable in the first place, but she saw the way his eyes turned ever so slightly colder, the way his mouth set imperceptibly harder. Another person might not have noticed those differences, but to the princess, it was like he was glaring at her, upset for bringing up something he didn't want to hear. It wasn't even a sad kind of upset, something she could understand and empathize with him for- he was just _angry._ It was gone just as quickly as it came, and he returned to his normal, amiable self, but the afterimage of that look remained, tainting and distorting his words after that.

 

“Of course, milady. You're probably right. I often forget that I have far less real-life experience than other, much longer-lived people may have had.” He was saying that just to be hurtful, she knew it, but the worst thing was, she had no idea why, no idea what she had done to make him upset. Swallowing hard, she looked away from her steward, turning towards Kaze.

“Can you guide us to the best point of entry?” The ninja bowed deeply.

“Of course, Nerrida-sama. Follow me.” She did so without a word, refolding the map as she walked, making the creases extra sharp just to have something to occupy her mind with.

 

Four months. It had been four months since everything had gone so wrong. Xander thought she was a traitor, Leo disdained her and was ensuring their sisters did as well, now even Jakob was getting mad at her. Jakob _never_ got mad at her- it just didn't happen! Perhaps this was some sort of divine retribution- maybe the gods were giving her a taste of what the rest of the world felt towards her for choosing to side against her country. Even though in her mind, she argued that she would never betray Nohr, the fact remained that she had chosen to associate herself with people who killed her countrymen-and-women without batting an eye. Did that not tar her with the same ignominy? Misery and loathing, both directed outwards as well as at herself, welled up inside the princess. The sound of crunching snow behind her only fueled that hatred.

 

“You should ready your sword, Nerrida. We never know when we might need to defend ourselves. Hopefully you're right, though, and these 'gaar-oo' truly _aren't_ antagonistic towards humans.”

“I doubt they will be. So it'd be great if you could, you know; keep pretending to _be_ one.” Nerr spat coldly. She picked up the pace, falling in step beside Kaze. She was being just as bad a Jakob now, snapping at people for no apparent reason (though really, after that massacre at the border, Ryouma should have known full well what she was talking about). Really though, if her brother with whom she shared blood was a monster, what did that make her? Something _better?_ Not likely...

000

 

Despite the grueling climb, rivaled only by the Eternal Stairway in terms of sheer length, Nerr rather enjoyed the journey up Mount Crninoćnivuk. There was thick snow on the ground that slowed them down and burned her feet, and the gnarled trees had been stripped bare by winter's chill, but the desolation was beautiful to her. It reminded her painfully of her home in the mountains similar to this one. For fifteen years, bleak and barren wasteland had been her only scenery; she learned how to enjoy the view. The cold air chilled her to the bone, but filled her lungs with ease, even the smell similar to her Northern Citadel. Given that they were following a sort of trail marked by trees, Nerr did not have to worry about getting lost. She took the opportunity to indulge in one of the many things she'd had to give up on since making her choice and took off running. She would not go far; she didn't want Silas and Jakob to worry. There was a small, dilapidated fort about ten or so meters from where the rest of the army was, the first of a small cluster. That would be her goal.

 

The cold stung her face and made her eyes water, painfully burning her mouth and nose as she breathed, but it didn't matter. Running laps had been the one part of her training she sincerely enjoyed if only because it was one of the few times in the day she could truly forsake her thoughts and just _be_. Even when she was engaged in arms training, she had to keep track of her stances in her head, and in the back of her mind was always the fear that what she was doing wasn't good enough to meet her father's exacting standards. She didn't have to focus on anything or impress anyone when she ran. Everything fell away then. She reached the fort quicker than she expected, leaning over to rest her hands on her knees and catch her breath. Her mouth was dry, but she felt better than she had in days. To her surprise, she could hear footsteps approaching almost as quick, more than one set. Standing upright, she turned to see Ryouma and Takumi jogging up to her, well ahead of the others. The younger prince doubled over, breathing hard for a moment as he tried to glare at her.

 

“Wh-why did you take off running like that, you-- you idiot?” He broke off coughing. It probably wouldn't have hurt him to put his bow down sometimes and do a few laps instead.

“I needed to.”

“What? What are you-- ugh, forget it. I don't care.” Ryouma was not so eager to let the subject drop, but seemed to be thinking of the best way to ask what was on his mind without triggering her to lash out at him or else, clam up entirely. No easy feat. Finally, he settled on a simple question.

“...how are you doing, Nerrida? Do you need to take a break?” She paused before answering, trying to discern what exactly might be hidden in that question. Had he spoken those words to anyone else, it would've just come across as brotherly concern, but Nerr was utterly convinced he did not feel such things when it came to her. Every word from his mouth was some sort of plot to try and brainwash her into staying in Hoshido. Even so, she could not think of a good enough reason to not answer so plain a question.

 

“I'm fine. We should give the others a chance to catch up. Perhaps they need the rest.” The high prince nodded.

“Good idea. Perhaps I should backtrack and--” He broke off his sentence as both his younger siblings tensed, turning towards the direction of the rest of the broken forts on the other side of the path. Nerr did not know how Takumi heard what she had- with the snow muffling everything, she'd barely caught it herself. Perhaps he was a hunter, attuned to the sound of movement. Of all the things she had expected to jump out at them, a small group of people in heavy cloaks was not on the list. Four of them, three men and one woman by the looks of things, stalked closer to the royals. They _seemed_ like normal humans, perhaps strangely dressed brigands at first glance, but then one saw the bushy black and gray tails jutting out from their spines, the long, furry ears barely concealed by their hoods, the thick, sharp claws tearing through their gloves. One of them growled, a low, terrifying sound that only an animal could make. Ryouma moved, without thinking it seemed, to stand in front of his brother and sister. Takumi's grip on his Fuujin yumi tightened considerably as his face paled with fear.

 

“Wh-what are we dealing with here? Another of Nohr's monstrosities?”

“How should I know?” The older prince whispered his response tersely. “I'm not familiar with what's native to these lands. They look like shape shifters.” Indeed they did. One of the males, who's garb seemed of a significantly higher quality than that of his companions, stepped forward. With his dark trousers and waistcoat, it would have been easy to think he was just a man about town, but the sharp teeth he bared as he snarled at them belied that notion.

 

“Hey! What are you doing in our den!?” Nerr could see her blood brother reaching for his Raijinto. Gods above, was his first instinct to kill anything that looked Nohrian? Frowning for a moment before reworking her face into something more approachable, the princess stepped forward, ignoring Ryouma's desperate attempt to pull her back. She shot the Garou who had spoken a tight lipped smile- she'd read that one should never show one's teeth to a dog; they considered that a sign of aggression.

“Hello. I'm terribly sorry, I didn't realize this _was_ a den, much less yours. Whom might I have the honor of speaking to?” Always be polite upon a first meeting whenever possible, disarmingly so, she had been taught. It seemed that advice was well crafted, for the male's expression softened just a touch. It seemed his tail was even wagging just the slightest bit.

 

“Me? Oh, I'm Flannel, pack leader and your superior.” He smiled slightly at his introduction, a smile that quickly returned to a scowl. “And you _can't have my fur!_ Got it!? Humans are always up here, trying to take our fur. That's fine with me; revenge is a dish best served as a stew, after all.” His voice had grown lowered, distorted as though it wasn't being spoken by human vocal chords for a moment. His last remark could have been taken as an extreme metaphor had he not reached into his pocket and pulled out a handful of... something, tossing it in the snow at Nerr's feet. She looked down, recoiling from the sight a bit. Phalanges and metacarpals, gobbets of meat and a few shreds of gristle and skin still stuck to them. A human hand. She could see bite marks where something- or rather, _someone_ \- had been gnawing on them. Behind her, a voice that most certainly came from Takumi, gagged. She was not nearly so disgusted. A bit shocked, maybe even disheartened, but not disgusted.

 

“Hmm. Well, if they were poachers, I'm sure they had it coming.”

“Yeah, they sure-- wait. _What?_ ”

“Nerrida, what are you--” She held up a hand to silence her brother, keeping her attention focused on Flannel.

“These people came into your home with the intention of killing you and your people for your fur, yes? Were they at least going to eat you?” The Garou scoffed.

 

“Doubt it. Humans are wasteful; they wouldn't know good meat if it bit 'em in the ass.”

“Then that's despicable in the extreme. They got what was coming to them.” She'd be lying if she said she didn't believe her own words to an extent. Fur was wonderful, but to kill a poor creature just for _that_? That was no better than hunting for fun, in her opinion. She continued, holding her hands out in an inviting gesture. “I can assure you, my comrades and I have no interest in your fur. We simply want to pass through.”

 

“Nerrida, what are you doing?”

“In fact, I'll prove it to you. Ryouma, Takumi, lay down your weapons.”

“What!?” The younger prince squawked indignantly. “Are you crazy!? I'm not going to--”

“You're going to, or I'm going to make you regret it. Put your damn bow down. You too, Ryoma Sama.” Untying her own scabbard from her sword belt, the Nohrian girl laid the Yato in the snow, turning to glare at her brothers until they followed suit. Takumi grumbled bitterly all the while, and the high prince crossed his arms over his chest, frowning deeply at her.

 

“I hope you know what you're doing, sister...”

“Yeah. You'd better be right about this.” Flannel seemed just as distrustful as the Hoshidans.

“What's this all about, human? Normally, when I show humans my super cool bones, they freak out and run away screaming, or say I'm an evil monster or something. No human ever told me I was right for eating one of their kind.”

 

“Well, I'm not saying you're right for _eating_ them, per se, though I suppose letting them rot is no better... I'm saying you're justified in protecting what's dear to you, and any human should agree. Also... I'm a tad bit less human than you might think...” The lone female growled and leaned closer to the leader, whispering something that she could not make out. He nodded, and stepped closer to Nerr. She wanted to back away, but showing fear was another one of those things you were not supposed to do in front of dogs. She wouldn't know; she'd never actually seen a real, live dog before. His lips twisted in a scowl, Flannel glared at her for a moment... before leaning down, pressing his nose to the crook of her neck and sniffing furiously. Takumi let out a cry of disdain, and she was tempted to do the same, if only because the Garou's nose was cold. He continued sniffing her, ears, hair, nose... she wondered if her nose smelled. Finally straightened, the pack leader's frown seemed less angry and more confused.

 

“What the hell are you, lady? You don't smell like a human. Identify yoursmellf!”

“Well, in a nutshell, I'm a shape-shifter. Like you.” All at once, his suspicion seemed to fall away, his tail thumping painfully against his leg.

“Really? Heh, I knew it. I knew you smelled too nice to be a dumb old human. _I_ said that you were one of us from the get go, but these guys... psh.” He jabbed a thumb at his companions, who were regarding him with blank stares. Smiling widely, he locked his hands behind his head. “Alright, alright, I believe you. You and your pack can pass through.”

 

“Thank you, Flannel. I really appreciate it.”

“Of course you do. Hey, and as a token of good will, I'll even let you keep my super cool hand!” Nerr felt her smile grow tense as she looked down at the bones at her feet. They were a dark yellow, with splotches of dried blood on them. Oh, she'd gotten herself into something now. If she refused, that would hurt his feelings and he might decided not to let them pass, but if she accepted... she'd have to pick the horrid thing up. Grabbing it gingerly by one finger and trying not to vomit, the Nohrian princess forced herself to smile widely.

 

“Oh... goodness, it's so lovely. I've never seen such a... fine display of bone structure...”

“Yeah, I have the best taste.”

“Too true. Oh, but...”

“Huh? But what?” She feigned a look of miserable uncertainty.

“If I accept this... my companions will all be upset that _they_ didn't get anything. Then they'll be angry at me and think it was _my_ fault, that I was greedy and didn't want to share...” She looked over her shoulder at the princes. If ever they wanted to act like good brothers, _now_ was the time. Takumi pulled a face and took another step away from her. Ryouma, however, seemed to cotton onto her plan, and nodded grimly.

 

“I'm afraid our companions can be rather immature about such things. Loathe as I am to admit it, even _I'm_ jealous of such a magnificent... gift.” It was unclear if he found the situation disgusting, or hilarious, but the end result was the same. Flannel frowned slightly, scratching the back of his messy, two-tone hair.

“Yeah... I guess I can see how that would be a problem, having everyone in your pack killing each other over my awesome gift.”

“I would never forgive myself for allowing it to happen. Perhaps you could keep it for me. Physically, at least. I will keep the memory of it in my heart, where it can't be stolen.” She held the hand out to him, praying to any god that was listening that he would take it. Her prayers were answered, because with a haughty smirk, he snatched it back, tearing off one of the few chunks of flesh still remaining on it with his teeth before stuffing the whole thing back in his pocket. One of the fingers broke off from the force.

 

“Okay. I'll graciously keep this for safe keeping for you, but only because I'm so generous.” Behind him, she could hear one of the other Garou whisper.

“And humble, let's not forget that...” Nerr could not help but smile a bit as well. Yes, of course those old, worm eaten books had been wrong. The Garou were perfectly lovely, in their own way, provided you did not antagonize _them_.

 

Stooping down, she picked up her Yato, tying it back to her belt when the air suddenly seemed to burn. It was a strange, overwhelming smell, and it seemed the Garou noticed it too, looking around, nostrils flaring. Suddenly, one of the shape shifters cried out as his body was engulfed in a cloudy, dark energy. He seemed suspended in it for a moment, his body seeming to jerk inward before exploding in a shower of blood and bright light. She could not help but scream as the blood splashed across her, so hot that steam rose from it in the cold air as it pattered to the ground, staining the snow a vivid crimson. Limbs fell as well, an arm here, a tail there, the bones cracked, their marrow leaking out over the shredded skin and muscle that had literally been pulled at until it tore like cloth. At once, Ryouma and Takumi had their weapons at the ready, looking for the unseen threat. The attack must have been visible from some distance, because she could hear people calling out as they quickened their steps. But she could not do anything.

 

“What the hell _was_ that?!” The high prince demanded, panic lacing his angry voice. Nerr thought it was obvious, but then remembered that they didn't have such things in Hoshido. She recognized elder magic anywhere, though. And that blast... it was possible it wasn't, but it certainly _looked_ similar to the kind of power that had exploded from Ganglari... Good gods, was King Garon behind this _too?!_ What did he have to gain from it? Flannel, having recovered from the shock of the sudden attack, knelt in the snow beside his companion's head, which lay several feet from his torso, a large section of skull missing, the brain within crushed slightly.

 

“Hey... H-hey! W-wake up! This is-- this isn't funny, okay? Snap to it...” She could hear the tears in his voice, choking him, dripping down his face and into the snow. Gingerly, the Garou reached out, lightly tapping the head's bloody cheek, sniffling piteously. “Open your eyes... please? ...not like this... n-not like this...!!” He threw his head back, his plaintive wail sounding more like a mournful howl than a human sob.

“Oh, gods, no...” She could not stop the lament from escaping her own lips. Nerr felt as though she were going to be sick, the stench of blood in the air choking her almost as badly as the tears welling in her own eyes, blurring her vision. That was probably why she didn't notice the shape-shifter. charging at her until his thick claws racked across her face. Crying out in pain as the tender flesh there split open, the princess fell back onto the bloody snow. A figure ran past her, blocking the wolf's next frenzied swing.

 

“Nerr-sama! Are you okay?” She recognized Kaze voice, and lifted a cold, gloved hand to wipe away the tears blinding her. Flannel was slumped over, a manic, feral look in his eyes, which seemed to gleam with an unnatural light as he snarled.

“Gah! Get out of my way! This is between me and her! That was Nohrian magic; you're the only Nohrian here! You were tricking us the whole time!”

“No! I swear, I wasn't! I have no idea what happened!” Roaring his fury, the Garou lunged at her again, only to receive a kunai to the arm. As he reared back in pain, Ryouma lifted her to her feet.

“We have to fight our way free of here.”

“No!” Nerr yelled back at him. “We can't hurt them!”

 

“Are you suggesting we let them hurt _us?_ ” Takumi sneered, an incredulous look on his face.

“We just need to make it past them; we don't have to fight.” She wanted to say more, to try and reason with the pack leader one more time, but he had thrown his head back once again, truly howling this time. More snarls and barks echoed across the mountain as men and women in similar dark, ratty clothes appeared from the shadows, their eyes glinting in the moonlight. Tears continued streaming down Flannel's face as he glared at her, unbridled hatred in his eyes.

“Liars... I always knew not to trust anyone who didn't have a tail. You'll _die_ for this, _ALL OF YOU!!!_ We'll have a feast in Ninon's honor!” Kaze readied his blade in anticipation of another attack.

 

“I'm afraid we won't be able to outrun them, Nerr-sama. They'd kill us from behind before we made it halfway down the mountain.” She wanted to protest, to say that they could if they just _tried_ , but Flannel had reached into his other pocket, pulling out an amber stone similar to her own dragonstone. As he clenched it, she could see his body changing.

 

Limbs grew thicker and more muscular, with arms like tree trunks as course black fur sprouted out. A humanoid face grew darker, thicker, with eyes glowing like embers from within deep folds of leathery skin, yellow fangs lining a snarling maw. Thick claws, each as long as her arm, gleamed in the moonlight as the massive beast before her pounded it's giant paws on the ground before throwing it's head back and howling loud enough to send sleeping birds scattering. The transformation only lasted seconds at most, mostly concealed by a blinding flash of light, but Nerr had experienced her own transformation long enough to know all the changes that took place in those scant few moments. Behind them, the other Garou all began changing as well, some of them smaller, their fur mostly white, while a few became inky black like their pack leader. Streaks of crimson swirled around his paws like flames... or blood. His voice was tight with a mixture of misery and fury in her mind.

 

 _“I'll take YOUR life in exchange for his...!”_ The other beasts howled and braked, charging at them. Takumi took aim at one of the smaller, lighter ones, letting loose and arrow that struck it in the shoulder. A pained whine escaped the Garou's fleshy lips as it's bones shattered and blood splattered onto it's fur, but that blow barely slowed it down. The younger prince balked in terror.

“What the hell? That didn't do anything!” The sound of flapping over them barely gave them warning as a flame wreathed nageyari shot through the air, it's red hot tip piercing another wolf's skull with a loud crack. It managed to take a few more stumbling steps before collapsing, it's fur now aflame and filling the air with the pungent stench of burning hair. Hinoka tugged on her Amaterasu's chain, pulling it back into her hands with great difficulty.

 

“It looks like we have to aim to kill.” The princess's advice could barely be heard over another enraged howl from Flannel's mouth. He charged at Nerr with a lumbering gait, knocking aside Kaze and Ryouma, who had moved to try and defend her from the feral beast, as if they were rag dolls. Tossing herself forward and rolling through the snow was the only way she could avoid a similar blow. As the princess leapt back to her feet, she unsheathed her Yato and slashed at the Garou. The brass blade barely cut through his thick coat, which admittedly, was mostly because she could put no effort behind her blow.

“Flannel, _please_ , stop this! I swear to you on my honor, we didn't do anything! It was someone else! We don't want to fight!”

 

“ _Lies! Everything humans say are LIES!! Let's see how you like it when I kill YOUR pack-mates!”_ Deciding that he would rather take his vengeance by doing unto others rather than taking her life, he charged past her, into the crowd of soldiers. Following their leader's example, the others charged as well. Utter pandemonium ensued as the brawl turned bloody. Screams and whines filled the air, along with the smell of blood as blades slashed and claws gouged. One Garou fell to the ground, writhing in agony as magical flames crackled around it, singing away it's thick fur. Kagerou screamed as a well aimed swipe broke her humerus in half, claws slicing down to expose the silvery white bone. Saizou unsheathed the iron katana at his back and drove the dark blade into the beast's face over and over again, paying no heed to the blood pouring onto him.

 

A panicked cry pierced the air, drawing Nerr's attention. Sakura cowered, clutching her rod tightly as tears coursed down her cheeks in the face of the monster looming over her. Hayato, the closest to her, dashed forward and pulled out a set of scrolls, the air around him aglow as a large, cat-like creature composed of thunder magic leapt onto the Garou. It convulsed as it's nerves were overloaded, but even that was not enough to stop it. Reaching into her bag, the Nohrian girl pulled out her dragonstone, mid run as she began transforming. Protean flesh thickened and stretched to it's breaking point to cover elongated limbs that allowed her to run twice as fast. The agony of her spine pulling itself apart vertebra by vertebra was dulled by the sense of urgency clawing at her mind. The Garou raised it's colossal paws, dagger-like paws still wet with fresh blood. It did not have a chance to bring them crashing down on the heads of the two children before it as it lurched forward, a sharp whine squeeze from it's throat. Ornately curled horns jutted out through the beast's muscular torso, their golden luster concealed by the thick, slimy blood and viscera dripping from them.

 

 _“Leave... my sister... alone!”_ Wrenching her head to the side, the dragon's horns severed the monster's spine, tearing it's innards to shreds and widening the holes she had created enough for the thick, viscous soup to spill out onto the snow. It was not like attacking Faceless, despite the two creatures being roughly the same size. The Faceless were already dead, their bodies just barely held together by magic. They tore apart easily- they'd probably just rot down to the bone if left alone long enough. These Garou, however, were still alive, still breathing, still firm. It was like cutting into unripe fruit. By that time, Ryouma had gotten back to his feet, his armor dented, his face plates coming loose. The Raijinto crackled as he ran towards the Garou, sinking it into the side of the nearest one, the heat of the blade burning away hair and making it slide easier into the flesh. Though the wound was cauterized, the organs that spilled out of the cut were wet and bloody, some parts of the long ropes of thick intestines cut open in places as well, releasing a fetid stink into the air.

 

The battle seemed to be dying down, the last few remaining Garou quickly being subdued as the likes of Rinkah and Scarlet smashed their skulls, not stopping until the bone split to reveal the bloody pink folds within. In death, the beasts did not remain monstrous, quickly losing their mass and reverting back to humanoid forms, albeit with slit bellies, charred flesh and crushed skulls. Parts of them nearest to their injuries remained canid, limbs grossly disproportionate to the rest of their bodies, mouths stretched far too wide and lined with far too many teeth for human faces. Tufts of fur stuck to the frozen patches of gore. That seemed to be the end, but a low snarl from a cluster of snow covered brush belied that the fight was not yet over. Nerr barely had time to turn and face the direction of the sound before a blur of black and red lunged at her, knocking her to the ground in a pile of spindly limbs.

 

Her wings twisted under her in an impossible angle, but there was no chance to bemoan the bones jutting from her back slowly fracturing under the strain. Her thick skin and hard scales were likely all that kept Flannel's razor sharp claws from tearing her apart like chiffon. A powerful jaw closed on her right haunch, crushing the scales there like they were nothing more than ceramic, teeth like knives sinking deep into her flesh, cutting through the muscle. The draconic princess screamed, lashing out with her own claws and tail in a blind panic. The hysteric writhing succeeded in putting enough strain on her pinned wings to snap one of them clean in half, but even _that_ could not compare to the agony as the furious Garou that held her in his jaws began shaking his head savagely, tearing her wound even further open.

 

 _“Why did you have to come here?! Why did you have to ruin everything?! I tried to be NICE! I'll kill you!!”_ He let go of her leg, only to sink his teeth into her throat. She could feel the pressure cutting off her air, could feel the exposed underside of her long neck begin to give way under the points of his fangs. Desperately, she clawed at his face, aiming for the glowing pinpricks of his eyes, the light they cast all she could see in her dark, overly saturated world. Suddenly, the air crackled and a bolt of lightning hit the last standing Garou, thunder rumbling as the beast writhed and convulsed atop her. Unfortunately, the current passed through him into her, and she screamed as every nerve in her body was seared, as her organs slowly cooked, her blood evaporating from the heat... She knew this was Ryouma's doing. Had he finally gotten tired of her “sullen, foul-mouthed” nature and decided to kill two beasts with one stone? After what seemed like an agonizing eternity, the current stopped, though the pain remained blazing withing her. Flannel slumped over, breathing hard, thick ropes of slimy saliva dripping onto her with ever pant, but still alive.

 

“You die! NOW!” She could barely register the arc of brilliant light even as it came frightfully close to her face. For a moment, it seemed Flannel did not realize it either, even though his fur was singed and smoking profusely around his face. His expression was frozen, but little by little, it slipped. Literally slipped, as the left side of his face began sliding down before falling off and landing in the snow with a loud thud. A clean cut even through bone, the heat of the holy blade had seared the brain and skin and blood vessels. That made the experience no less horrifying as the massive beast collapsed on top of her. Every soldier within ten miles could probably hear her screaming, but Nerr could not bring herself to care, ignoring her injuries and further exacerbating them as she scrambled to get up.

 

 _“Oh gods, it's all over me! Get it off, get it off!!!!”_ Rinkah and Ryouma tugged the mammoth corpse off her, but that wasn't enough. The snow beneath her had melted and mixed with the blood, and now, she was drenched in it. Her mind reeled, the human panic overriding any sort of comforting instinct the draconic side tried to provide. The princess was certain she looked like a roach stuck on it's back as her limbs flailed desperately in the air (the thick, wavering feelers that jutted out behind her horns doing nothing to help that mental image), but she couldn't stop herself, she couldn't calm down enough to allow anyone near her to help, even though Jakob and Hinoka were both calling to her to relax. Finally, she managed to right herself, trying to bolt- she did not know, nor care, where to- but the moment she put weight on her injured back leg, she collapsed. The bodies were everywhere, mountains of corpses just like in her nightmares. Wailing in misery, she lifted her head and smashed it back into the ground.

 

“Nerr! What are you doing, stop it!” Silas's voice could barely be heard over the ringing in her ears as she lifted her head again.

 _“No!_ _Wake up! Wake up! It's just a dream; I didn't do this!_ _”_ She had brought death to these poor creature's home. She could feel their blood drying on her. With a weak cry, she bashed her head back against the icy ground, pain surging through her skull as she felt something pop in the side of her mouth. She had to make it stop, make it all stop. She sobbed pitifully, praying that this was just a nightmare and someone would wake her up, _please gods, make it stop..._ The ground beside her head exploded, leaving a smoking crater, but not before a gust of wind blew in her face. Takumi was lowering his yumi, a tight scowl on his face as he stepped towards his sister. Reaching down, he grabbed one of the thick feelers weakly swaying behind her head, tugging it up and ignoring her pained protest.

 

“Shut up. Stop being so overly dramatic. You are so gods damned pathetic, you know that? 'Oh, boo hoo; I killed people who were trying to kill me first! I am wretched!' Get a grip! This is a war; you can't pick and choose your enemies. You tried to get us through here peacefully, and there probably wouldn't have been a problem if it hadn't been for that freak explosion, but guess what? _Shit happens!_ Now stop your damn whining; nobody has time for your pity party.”

 

He dropped her head back to the ground and continued walking, shouldering his bow as he marched. Nerr watched him go, retorts chasing each other around her head. She could tell him that he was good at telling others to stop whining, but not so great at taking his own advice. She could wonder aloud if he would be so flippant watching his own people be so viciously slaughtered. She could have just said that she didn't expect a slimy little maggot like him to understand things like guilt since he clearly enjoyed killing... but she didn't say anything. He was right, at least in part. She just let her body grow smaller, not even bothering to shift her position.

000

 

Although a small part of her expected all the Hoshidans to just leave her to her pity party and carry on without her, it had really only been Takumi and his retainers that continued on ahead, with Hinoka taking hers along to join him under the reasoning that it wasn't safe for them to be alone. Jakob and Sakura fussed over her, trying to restore her health back to the point where she wouldn't simply keel over; no easy task it seemed. Her leg had not seemed so dire in her dragon form, but as a human, she could see where there meat was scraped off the bone in places. It bled profusely- Garou apparently had some sort of toxin in their saliva that kept blood from clotting properly, not to mention all the viruses they carried. Even if she survived the night, there was no guarantee that she would not fall ill at a later time. Aside from her broken scapula, it seemed that she had dislocated her jaw in her last fit of pique. Scarlet wryly remarked that she didn't know many people who could take such a licking and keep on ticking.

 

Perhaps to try and ease the obvious discomfort in the air, Silas mentioned that it had almost always been like this when they played together as children; hardly one play date ended without her falling off of something or getting stuck in something. Nerr would have contested that claim had she cared about anything but the overwhelming sorrow within her (and the fact that her newly healed jaw was still swollen and sore). Some of the others who were not injured them self had taken the momentary calm to move the Garou's corpses from the trail. She watched as Kaze dragged Flannel's body to the side of the trail, his physique mostly human, covered in severe burns from the Raijinto's thunder magic. She herself was badly burned in places, to the point that her flesh had been completely seared away in some spots, and was left with branching scars across her torso. She still convulsed at times, the healing magic surging through her barely repairing her fried nerves. It barely repaired anything. Despite two healers pouring all their magic into her, her bones had only just begun re-knitting. Breathing hard, Jakob slumped forward, wiping the sweat from his brow with a bloody sleeve. Was it the Garou's blood or hers? Probably a mix of both.

 

“This isn't working. Gods damn it all, why isn't this working?!” Sakura was panting as well, a miserable look in her eyes.

“Oh... I-I-I don't know. I'm trying s-so hard, nee-sama! I'm s-s-sorry!” Ryouma walked over, resting a large hand atop his youngest sister's head.

“We all know that, Sakura-chan. No one can ask any more of you. You're probably just tired, both of you; it's weakening your magic.” His eyes scanned Nerr's battered, bloody body, wearing an inscrutable expression. “We don't have time to linger here much longer. I sincerely doubt this was all of the Garou; if there are more, they could corner us and pick us off quickly while we're weak. We need to at least try and cover more ground. Nerrida, I'm afraid you'll just have to make do with tourniquets for now.” She didn't nod or grunt or give any sign that she had heard him. Sighing deeply, Jakob took a roll of bandages from Sakura and began wrapping it around her mangled thigh. It took a great deal of effort to get up, but once she was back on her feet, the Nohrian girl refused any attempt to aid her, limping heavily but remaining upright.

 

Her skin ripped slightly ever time she tore her feet away from a patch of frozen blood, but that pain could hardly be compared to the pain of those who's blood she was trudging through. They walked for about another hour before reaching the site Hinoka and Takumi had stopped at. A large, rotting garrison tucked into the side of the mountain stood opposite a deep ravine. It must have been centuries old, and though one of it's walls had crumbled, the ceiling still stood. Ryouma decided they would rest here, taking the watch in shifts, and continue their trek to the summit in the morning. Despite Azura's insistence that she rest and her own exhaustion, Nerr did not yet feel like she could bring herself to settle down and begin forgetting what had just transpired. She limped away from the others, making her way to the ravine. If any lingering Garou felt like finishing her off, so far from the others, they were more than welcome to.

 

The princess stared into the deep chasm, trying to pinpoint the exact depth at which even her keen eyes could no longer penetrate the darkness. This chasm was probably not infinite, but that didn't mean any remains that fell into it would ever be recovered. They would be swallowed by the mountain, perhaps gravity forcing their corpses further down through extremely narrower gaps until their limbs pulled in every direction and they slid through to the other end of the earth, an elongated monstrosity who's bones groaned as it inched forward, _drrrrrrr.._. That seemed exactly like the kind of death she deserved. Flannel's final words to her rang loud and mocking in her skull, _I tried to be nice to you!_ Nerr knew all too well the pain that came from realizing someone you showed kindness to turned on you. And though she had truly not been responsible for the attack (and was certain no one from Hoshido could have been, either), the Garou believed she was, which made it the same point in their minds. All she really had to do was tilt forward a little, and she'd go careening into the ravine. Simple, a simple way to die. She could feel herself leaning, as though some invisible force was pulling at her. Just a little further... A heavy, warm hand on her shoulder pulled her back, and she looked to see Kaze standing behind her, his brows furrowed. He breathed a quick sigh of relief.

 

“Thank goodness. I saw you pitching forward and was afraid that you had passed out due to blood loss. You should not stand so close to the edge, Nerr-sama. You could fall in.”

“...yes... that would be a terrible thing...” Her gaze shifted back towards the darkness, and it seemed the shinobi was beginning to doubt that she was there by coincidence. Gripping her arms tightly, the green-haired man steered her a few feet from the edge, placing himself between her and the crevasse.

“Nerrida-sa-- ...no. Lady Nerr, I know this hurts you. I can see from the suffering in your eyes that this loss feels as though it were your own people that perished--”

 

“ _'As though'_? Those _were_ my people! They were _Nohrians_ , regardless of what race they were! And what if Ryouma was wrong, what if they really _were_ all the Garou; we could have just wiped out an entire species! This is war, Takumi said; you can't pick and choose your enemies, Takumi said! Well, I suppose that justifies things completely! We owe the poor Garou an apology- or we _would_ , if we hadn't, you know, _murdered them all in cold blood!_ ” She could feel the blood pulsing through her ears as her heart thudded against her chest. The world kept flashing gray sporadically, and her gums itched as her teeth seemed to begin liquefying. Kaze gripped her shoulder, shaking her slightly.

 

“Lady Nerr, _please,_ you must calm yourself! What happened here is not our fault!” His words seemed to still her partial transformation, if only because of the sense of incredulity they inspired.

 _“...not our fault...?”_ She could not speak with her mouth and tongue, as they had been sealed shut with her melted teeth, so she let her thoughts broadcast, a jumble of anger and misery she could barely untangle. “ _If we hadn't trudged through their territory, they'd still be alive. If we hadn't come to Nohr, they'd still be alive. If YOU hadn't_ _dragged_ _me to Hoshido, my mother wouldn't have been killed, this war never would have escalated, and they would_ _ **still be alive!!!!**_ _”_

 

Her head felt like it was being split open, her lungs burning. Groaning as the pain overwhelmed her, the princess dropped to her knees, the agony of her leg wound reopening fading into the haze of misery blinding her. Arms wrapped around her, taking great care not to put any pressure on her broken shoulder but still pulling her into a tight embrace against a muscular chest. For a moment, she let herself think she was back home at the citadel, that she was young again and had just woken up from a nightmare, that Gunther was the one holding her and making soft, soothing noises. But that was wrong, these shoulders were not broad enough, the pulse was too panicked, too erratic to be her stalwart retainer... But despite his clear unease, Kaze continued trying to calm her as her tears soaked into his purple mantle. Slowly, her pulse became steady, her mouth ungluing itself as her teeth returned to normal. The pain in her head remained, but not as such an unyielding pressure. He continued shushing her for a moment, gently rubbing the non-injured side of her back.

 

“...you have such a gentle heart... you'd take the weight of the world on your shoulders if only you could. But such is too much of a burden for one person to carry alone.” His voice, already quiet, dropped even lower. “I would like to help you, milady... would you allow me to serve you?” With a pathetic sniffle, Nerr looked up, into the deep, blue eyes staring down at her. Her mind, which had been in a tizzy of unpleasant thoughts, went blank at that strange request.

“To... serve me? I don't-- what do you mean? I have a steward, thank you.” She was not lounging about in a castle; she did not need someone to wait on her hand and foot... that was Jakob's job, besides. Kaze frowned slightly.

 

“Ah, pardon me. Of course you wouldn't be familiar with Hoshidan tradition. You see, milady, it is expected that the most skilled, elite soldiers will eventually take a liege.” The princess's lip twisted. She'd never heard someone brag about them self in such a humble manner before. “As you are aware, Tsubaki and Hana serve Sakura-sama. Hinata and Oboro serve Takumi-sama. Hinoka-sama counts on Azama and Setsuna... well... in theory... And Kagerou and my brother work directly for Ryouma-sama.” She gave him a blank look.

“Yes, Suzukaze, I'm not blind- I've noticed that. I'm also familiar with what 'retainers' are.” Good lord, did he think her some kind of simple minded shut-in? And what was this about? Was he jealous that all the proper royals were taken? She wondered if this was perhaps why he had started referring to her simply as “Nerr” recently, something only Nohrians did. Was he trying to prove that he could fit in with her small band? “...I suppose I'm the only one left for you. I pity you.”

 

“On the contrary. I feel blessed that I've remained unattached... because now, I can pledge my loyalty to you alone.” Nerr looked into his earnest face, eyes shining with hope, a slight smile playing about on his lips. She had often heard people (especially women) say how handsome Kaze was, but truthfully, he struck her as bland. Just like Hoshidan food, and clothing, and everything else from his country. She drummed her fingers against her forearm in agitation.

“...you operate under the assumption that I _want_ you as a retainer. I do not.” At once, the hopeful look on his face shattered like a sugar-spun egg, replaced with confusion and hurt.

“B-but why? Am I not strong enough? Do I not meet your standards?”

 

“The fact that I am here with these Hoshidans in the first place is _your_ fault.” She hissed bitterly at him. It felt wonderful, blaming someone else for her problems, taking the burden off herself (wasn't that exactly what he wanted to help her with?). “I spare your wretched life and you retaliate by delivering me straight into the hands of my enemy. If you and Rinkah had just gone back, if you had just left well enough alone, I never would have ended up in Hoshido in the first place and everything would be fine. I've somehow ended up in a terrible nightmare world where I'm surrounded by strangers, I'm fighting my family and killing my countrymen- _everything_ is wrong and I HATE IT!! I don't _want_ your loyalty, Suzukaze- I want nothing to do with you! Go serve Azura; I _have_ retainers.” Yelling at him didn't feel so good anymore. In fact, it felt very bad, leaving her with a miserable guilt roiling in her stomach. She doubled over a bit, clutching her gut and trying to fight the urge to vomit. Why hadn't he just left her alone? Kaze remained silent, having said nothing as she yelled at him. His hurtful expression had taken on a more neutral quality, though she could still see how badly her words stung him.

 

“...yes, I am aware that Jakob-san is your retainer, but who else? Silas-san? Because he never said--”

“Never you mind! This isn't something I'm discussing with you. I don't need a replacement- _especially_ not a backstabber like you!” Silence fell over them again, but when the ninja next spoke, his voice was more forceful.

“Lady Nerr, you must believe me when I tell you I did not realize that returning to Hoshido would cause you such duress. I assumed, as did we all, that you were Nohr's captive, that they were using you, that you _wished_ to return to the land of your birth. I thought-- I thought I was doing you a service, you and Mikoto-sama both. The way her eyes lit up when I told her I recognized you, you should have seen it... I thought you would be just as happy.” The heartache in his voice tore at her. It was just as Hinoka had said; people thought her life in Nohr had been a living hell. It wasn't as though they asked her about such things, so how could they have known any different? She could only imagine how Kaze felt watching her bitter, angry reunion with her family that first day, the hope he felt that he had done something good shattered.

 

“...why me? Seriously, why not Azura? The Hoshidans consider her part of their family. What; you can only serve someone with a blood tie to Hoshido?”

“No, milady. I could have chosen to serve Azura-sama... but I didn't. I wish to serve you. I've heard your plans, heard you think about the dangers we face from every angle... I know that you're willing to do things that might be considered unpleasant or even cowardly if it means avoiding conflict.” The shinobi inhaled deeply and sighed, a darker look shadowing his eyes. “Despite Ryouma-sama's natural inclination to take charge and your evident disdain for our cause, I truly feel that _you_ should be the leader of our group. Our prince is... reckless, at times. He does not give up, even when he should. His remaining in Chevalier rather than returning where he was needed proved that.” Nerr scoffed slightly. Finally, someone else realized that.

 

“Well, it's fine and dandy that you think I should be in charge, but I'm only traveling in the same direction as you. And even if I _did_ wish to lend my support to Hoshido for this war- which I do _not_ \- I could not do so by giving orders. Apparently, seniority reigns in Hoshido, so I'm third in the line of command. If you don't like the way things are handled, you should start kissing Ryouma's ass and make him think your ideas are _his_ ideas.” Kaze opened his mouth, a disquieted look on his face, but he quickly closed it.

“Even now, you speak the unpleasant truth that no one wants to hear. Nohrians do not 'beat around the bush', as they say.”

“No. We don't.” He nodded.

“Then... I will not, either. I've done something to you, milady... something that can never be forgiven...” Her first thought was that he had done something to her while she slept, but no, Saizou was clearly the pervert in the family. Still, those words were quite suspect.

 

“Oh? You mean there's something aside from all the unpleasantness I've already listed that I don't know about? ...are you watching me pee? Because I swear to the gods, your brother gets off on that.”

“What?! NO! I would never-- what do mean, my brother--?” He sputtered incoherently for a moment. Oh, it seemed the red-haired shinobi hadn't filled anyone in on his covert operations. The shinobi shook his head, still shaken up by that reveal. “No, Lady Nerr, allow me to explain. When I was much younger--” His recollection had been rudely interrupted by a thundering crash. He leapt to his feet, taking an attack stance against any unseen enemies that may have been responsible for the noise.

 

“What was that?!” Another explosion rang out, this one louder, and closer. The ground at their feet trembled, and Nerr, still on her knees, blanched as she saw a deep fissure form at the rock before.

“Oh gods, Kaze, _move!!”_ She lunged forward, knocking the green-haired ninja further away as another explosion, the same dark, cloudy glow that had sparked the Garou's attack went off beside her, the energy put forth by the elder magic throwing her to the side as it widened the fissure. Stone crumbled with a deafening roar as it fell into the ravine. Nerr could feel the ground beneath her shifting and falling away. Well, this had been what she wanted, hadn't it? The gods seemed to listen to her thoughts at the strangest time. Before she could be swallowed by the rubble and dragged into the darkness as well, a hand grabbed her wrist. She blinked, coughing through the cloud of dust, and saw Kaze above her, laying on his stomach as he tried to pull her up. The ground under his chest was crumbling at a dangerous rate.

 

“No!” She shrieked. “Let me go! We'll both fall in if you don't!”

“Nnng... n-never! I can't let you die! I've already failed you once! It was my fault you were kidnapped as a child!!” His voice echoed loudly in the ravine, a chorus of Suzukazes lamenting, _it was my fault_ around her. She felt her glove slip, dropping her another inch into the abyss. Her heart thundered against her chest.

“That can't be true. And even if it is, I don't care! Let me go!”

“It _is!_ I could have prevented everything!” The hand he used to support himself slipped as the stone beneath it fell away, nearly dropping the ninja into the ravine. He was quick enough to find another anchor, but there would not be much left for him if he didn't let her go. She could see tears welling in his eyes, dripping onto her face with every blink as he fought to pull her up. He truly believed whatever he was telling her.

 

“Whatever happened, it's not your fault! You were a child! And I don't care- I was _happy_ in Nohr, happier than I ever could've been in Hoshido! I was cared for! I was cherished! I was _loved!_ Everything is ruined now... just let me go!!”

“No! I have to make things right...!”

“Nerr! Kaze! Hold on!” Looking up past him, the princess saw a vague white shape against the dark sky, Hinoka's voice calling out. More voices, panicked and too far away, were muffled by the rocks.

“Hinoka! Forget about me! Help him!” Kaze's grip around her wrist tightened, bruising the bone as as decisive look crossed his face. He smiled at her, a brief flash of genuine joy amidst the heartache.

 

“It has been a pleasure serving you, Lady Nerr. Hinoka-sama! Catch!” With more strength than it seemed his slender body should've been able to muster, the shinobi hurled her upwards, a wall of white blinding her as another pair of arms grabbed her under the arms, heaving her across a saddle. Nerr could barely see from the pegasus' wing beating just inches from her face, but she heard the remaining rock break off, hitting against the rocks. As the pegasus gained altitude, she could just make out a speck of green against the rocks, growing smaller and darker as it was swallowed by the abyss.

 

“NOOOOO!!!!!” The Nohrian girl wailed. “KAZE!!!” Hinoka had to grab her by the back of her shirt to keep her from jumping back off.

“I'm sorry, Nerrida... I'm so sorry... I couldn't save him...!” The older princess's voice was tight with tears as she directed Kinka back towards their camp. Everyone had gathered around, terrified, asking hysterical questions, what happened, were they under attack, where was Kaze? Nerr let herself slip off the saddle she was laying across, limbs splayed out as she hit the ground. She could feel blood soaking into her tights, the split in her shoulder blade widening. Hinoka was explaining what she saw, but everyone's eyes were on the Nohrian girl, judging, blaming her... Takumi, Saizou... they were probably thinking the same thing that she was; it should have been her.

000

 

The next morning, they marched in a mournful silence, each person absorbed in their own thoughts. Nerr had walked ahead of the others, paying no mind to the pain wearing her down. Even though Sakura had attempted another round of healing when they woke, the older girl quickly stopped her. It was not helping, she could feel that her body was not responding to the magic the way it should have. Watching Kagerou in the corner, trying to console Rinkah, who was silently weeping, did not help matters. She could not endure anyone else's sorrow, she could not stand the way they looked at her, sympathetic glances masking the hatred they really felt. Nerr took a detour, walking off the beaten path, up, rather than north, her feet sinking into the powdery snow as it soaked her tights almost up to the knee.

 

There was a blinding light, the likes of which she'd only seen in Hoshido. It seemed to be the mountain's summit. Had there been light like this when Kaze died? Everyone always said when you died, you walked into a bright light. How could there have been, when he had been swallowed by an all-consuming darkness, the same kind that stole Gunther from her? Was this to be the fate of all her retainers, would they all perish because she seemed to have some awful fixation with abyssal depths? Would Jakob be next? She gripped the hem of her sweater, twisting it mindlessly. There was a soft crunching behind her, and Ryouma appeared, standing at her side. He glanced down at her, no false sympathy on his face. He looked the same as always, stolid as ever. Nerr appreciated that, for some reason. It was at least one apparent constant in the tumultuous sea of change. He inhaled deeply, his breath forming a cloud of fog around him as he sighed.

 

“...quite the view. I doubt many humans have made it to this summit... How are you doing, Nerrida?” How was she doing? She wanted to cry. She wanted to drop to her knees and howl and sob and curse the heavens for cursing her with such cruel luck, cursing her to live while others died in her place. But... she could not. Not because, as Takumi had reminded her, no one had time to put up with her self-indulgent pity, but because, try as she might, the tears would not come. For Gunther, for her mother, even for Zola, they came unbidden and uncontrollable, but here and now, for all those who had died the previous night... she could summon nothing. Ryouma was still waiting for a response.

 

“Kaze is dead.” She said simply. “He died because of me, because he was in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

“That is not true, sister.”

“It _is_. If he had just let me be, even if he had let me go like he should have, he would still be alive.”

“And _you_ would be dead.” That was just as well, as far as she was concerned. The high prince sighed deeply, looking back over the landscape. Before them was a canvas of white, with tiny dark spots where trees could be seen, their branches too bare to hold snow. “...Look, Nerrida. Can you see the sun breaking over the horizon?” She turned towards the direction of the blinding light, squinting a bit. All the snow amplified it's glare, making it nigh impossible for her to see anything. The horizon was composed of dark mountains, their peaks holding no snow... the Infinite Chasm. Her stomach dropped.

 

“The sun. You mean, over the horizon in Hoshido? Where it's just starting to reach us here?” Ryouma nodded, the light glinting off his crimson armor and desaturating the dark color.

“They say the sun never shines in Nohr, but we can see that's clearly not true. Perhaps it's small comfort, but I take this as a good omen.” Kaze's words from the night before came back to the forefront of her mind, about the eldest royal being reckless. He saw this as a good omen because he wanted to believe that things were going right for them, that what they were doing was right, even though it was so wrong. Nerr wanted to be angry, hearing this man who knew nothing about Nohr, who had lived in a comfortable city surrounded by rich children with too much time on their hands, speak about sunrises and good omens, but all she felt was the same weariness that overcame her when Elise wanted to play even after she had run herself ragged running drills.

 

“Don't talk about things you don't understand, Hoshidan. They say the sun never shines in Nohr because it's dark for twenty hours a day, sometimes even longer in the winter. _That_ sun is all the meager light we get after Hoshido is done basking in it.” She inhaled, closing her eyes against the brilliance. “Do you feel that? That warmth that's almost similar to Hoshido's? We're at the apex of Nohr, far away from all the darkness and despondence. The moment we climb down from the peak, it will be cold again; the way it should be, given that it's the middle of winter.” Sighing, Nerr turned away, bright red spots flashing behind her closed eyelids. Years of living in near constant dark had made her eyes overly sensitive to light. “You can keep your sun, Ryoma Sama; I will take solace in my darkness.” She expected him to argue, to tell her that she was wrong, that she was making things sound worse than they were and to stop exaggerating. Instead, all the prince did was rest his hand on her shoulder.

 

“We should get back to the others, Nerrida.” With those simple words, he began walking back down to the path, not waiting for her, perhaps assuming she would join them shortly. She didn't have to. She could have just stayed on top of the mountain until she wasted away. But her conscience would not let her. Kaze had told her, as he clung to her, refusing to let her die, that he wanted to do right by her, to make up for some perceived wrong against her. He had died so that she could live because he felt that she deserved to live, even when she herself did not feel that way. As cold and callous as she could be, Nerr did not have it in her to throw his final kindness back in his face so easily. She looked up, towards the bright, ultramarine sky. It was never this bright down on earth, nor further north. Hoshido's sun did wonders for the world this high up.

 

“I'm sorry, Suzukaze. I'm sorry that you died for me, but I promise that you won't have died in vain. I may not wish to live like this, but I will. I may not do good... but I'll do something. Rest in peace...” Her words, spoken in a hoarse whisper, were swallowed by the chilled breeze.

000

 

A/N- Man, sometimes I just can't write things as gruesome as I want them to be. This animal attack chapter sucked even worse than the one in 'The Rising Dark'. I'm sorry for that. Also, you'll notice that I'm not calling the Garou “Wolfskins” because that sounds so damn retarded. And “Crninoćnivuk” is pronounced “Tsear-Nee-Knowtch-Nee-Vook”. It's Croatian gibberish (well, they're real words individually, but you wouldn't put them together like that), but I love making Nohr more European. My mom (who is Croatian, you can thank her for my gibberish) says I need to make Nohr more German- “Your beloved Günter is German, after all!” she loves to tease. I might start doing that when we get closer to Windmire. And yeah, Kaze's dead; sorry, Kaze fans! I _always_ let him die in 'Birthright'. I won't lie- I go out of my way to play that route as savagely as I possibly can and just kill _everybody,_ then watch as all the characters keep talking about Hoshidans like they're pacifists. There are few things I dislike more than story and gameplay segregation.


	13. Addicted to Cynicism

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Ch.13- “Addicted to Cynicism”

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The journey down from the mountain seemed to take years, even though surely, it was scarcely two weeks. Despite all the battles they'd fought, all the deaths they'd witnessed, this was the first time they had lost one of their own. It hadn't even been in the heat of battle, just a stupid, senseless accident. The Hoshidan royals often spoke amongst themselves when they stopped walking for the night, saying that such a landslide could not have been natural. Hinoka had seen the explosions, that was why she rode over in the first place. Takumi still felt that there must have been a spy amongst them, because how else would anyone know where they had been? Nerr stayed as far away from them as possible when they had their discussions. If she approached, they would ask her questions, questions she had already answered.

 

A small part of her wanted to ask Ryouma if he knew about what Kaze had told her, about her abduction somehow being the ninja's fault. He had told her that first day that he had been present when it happened. But she stayed her tongue- if the prince had anything to say about that day, it would have just been a long, antagonistic rant about how evil Nohr was, and she did not have the energy to deal with such a thing. To her complete and utter shock, Saizou approached her one day while she had been cleaning the cuts on her face. Even though Jakob and Sakura still attempted to heal her almost every morning, the jagged gashes still opened and oozed sometimes. She had been wringing out the bloody rag when the red-haired ninja stepped in front of her, his single whole eye dark as he looked down at her. For a long moment, they remained silent, simply staring at one another. Nerr could feel guilt welling up in her, was certain that was his aim in coming over to her.

 

“Just say it already.” She hissed in a low whisper. “Tell me how much you hate me, tell me it should've been me who died, tell me you'll never forgive me for getting your brother killed. Just say something so you can _leave!_ ”

“...Kaze told me his plan.” What? That... hadn't been what she was expecting to hear. The shinobi looked away, towards the barren trees. “That he intended to put himself in your service, to become your retainer. I don't know what he saw in you, but... my brother is-- _was_ a good judge of character. To die protecting one's liege... there is nothing more honorable for a royal retainer.” Saizou grew silent once again, closing his eye as he breathed slowly and deeply. Had she not been looking directly at him the princess would have sworn she was seeing things, but she could just make out the moisture brimming around his lashes. She hated herself for seeing this, for bearing witness to this normally cold, hard, hateful man mourning his brother. She should not be there. She wanted to leave, but before she could take a single step in the opposite direction, the redhead opened his good eye again. It had gone back to being cold and unfeeling, but she had already seen his pain.

 

“I won't dishonor my brother's memory by hating you. And I'll no longer be surveying you, either.”

“...I don't believe that you trust me.”

“I don't.” He said simply. “But it seems likely that, if nothing else, you have no intention of hurting the royal family or any of our soldiers. ...if anything, the only person you're a danger to is yourself.” Perhaps he understood why she had wandered away that horrible night. Her grip tightened on the rag she held.

 

“Is that why you don't want to watch me anymore? If I did something like accidentally walk too close to the edge of a cliff, you'd have to save me if you saw?” Saizou remained quiet, his silence all the answer she needed. It wasn't as though she faulted him for it- she'd be in no hurry to rush to her aid, either. ”Are you sure you don't hate me?” She would not begrudge him his hatred- of everyone she had encountered thus far, he was the most entitled to it. The red-haired man shook his head.

“No. I don't hate you. I don't feel enough for you to hate you. I nothing you.” And with that, he walked away, leaving her to her thoughts. That was... an odd feeling. She had never been _nothing'd_ before. Hated, yes. Loved, resented, adored, disdained... everyone she had ever come across felt _something_ for her, but this new _nothing_... somehow, that bothered her more than if Saizou had just admitted that he hated her guts and prayed for her death.

000

 

It had been a long march, but finally, the desolate wilderness began to give way to houses and roads. A large city loomed before them, seeming to glow with all the lights lit within it's borders. As they entered, Nerr leaned against the border wall, sighing deeply. Her tights were soaked with blood and with every slight breeze, she felt the cold sink into her bones. Hooking her thumbs into the waistband, she tugged them down to her knees and began unwrapping the bandages around her right thigh. They were saturated with blood and watery pus. Even though the bone was no longer visible through the shreds of muscle, the flesh remained mangled. Tossing the bloody bandages aside, she shivered as a cold wind blew and hurriedly dug through her bag, pulling out another roll of bandages and a vulneray.

 

Lifting the clay bottle to her lips, she swallowed half of the viscous, salty-sweet potion and poured the rest over her wound. A long time ago, Jakob would never have even allowed her to try tending to her injuries herself, insisting that it was his duty and if she took it away from him, he'd have no reason to live. While his dedication may have been overwhelming to the point of smothering at times, she was always secretly happy that he was so loyal. As of late these days, he seemed to spend much more time with the Hoshidans than her, Oboro especially. It seemed he was no longer at risk of falling apart without her... That was a good thing. That was the way it should have been, but... it still made her sad. Sighing, she threw the empty vulneray aside, the clay shattering as it met the cobblestone street with a satisfying crash.

 

“Ugh. Gods, put your pants on; no one wants to see that.” She looked up, frowning at Takumi's expression. Her first assumption had been that he was talking about her partial nudity- even though she still wearing her smallclothes- but then she took notice of the mottled yellow and green bruises distorting her pallid flesh. For as long as she could remember, Nerr had never seen bruises on herself, not like this. After extremely powerful blows during training, or if she had broken something, the wound would swell and turn dark purple, but after a few minutes (a hour, at most) she would return to her natural pallor. Bruises had never needed to heal in stages before. Her body looked as if it had been riddled with shuriken from the inside out. Grumbling under her breath, she quickly re-wrapped her injury and tugged her tights back on, scowling at her blood brother as she walked past him.

 

“I wasn't putting on a show for you. You shouldn't stare at your sister when she's undressed, _pervert._ ” For someone who was supposedly disgusted at the sight of her bare thighs, Takumi's face was very flushed, and he was breathing more heavily than he should have been. Even though he was at “that” age, as Camilla had called it, that was no reason for him to get hot and bothered by the sight of her. Shuddering slightly in disgust, she picked up her pace, biting back a wince with every step as she limped. The city reminded her of Cyrkensia, though without the crush of people jostling them about in the streets.

 

“What is this place?” Ryouma asked, his eyes narrowed suspiciously as he took in the various dark alleyways that beckoned to be filled with assassins. Scarlet bounded up between the two royals (Nerr had not even realized that she'd fallen in step beside the high prince), throwing an arm around each of them.

“This, my sight-seeing chums, is Macarath. The northern Cyrkensia, and a bustling hub of commerce. This is probably the last place we're going to have to worry about running into the Nohrian army, because any soldiers that are stationed here are gonna be out shooting craps, or gettin' their dicks wet in the red-light district.” She was clearly trying to lighten the dark mood, but was going too far, as the Nohrian princess's dark look conveyed. Rather than back down, the rebel leader grinned at her mischievously. “Hey, don't give me that look; there are plenty of man-whores in the red-light district, too, if _you're_ looking for some action.”

 

“The brothels will have to wait.” Ryouma said tersely, perhaps not enjoying the implication of his girlfriend talking about visiting whore houses with his sister. “After funneling us towards the mountain, King Garon must surely have known that, had we survived, we'd end up here eventually. Yet the place seems oddly deserted.”

“This is clearly the residential district. Perhaps the rumors of a swarm of roaming Hoshidans simply scared everyone inside...” Nerr said simply. Surely he hadn't been expecting to see armed guards in front of every home. “In fact, we should _stay_ in the residential district as much as we possibly can. If we stick to the shadows and don't make a spectacle, any civilians who see us will probably just assume we're Nohrian soldiers.”

 

“I agree.” Scarlet nodded. “If there's one thing I learned when I was training with the third Cheviot battalion, it's that people want _nothing_ to do with soldiers. As soon as they see someone carrying a lance, they lock their doors, so if we just stay quiet, we can--” As if on cue, a loud, hacking cough echoed through the narrow streets. Everyone jumped at the unexpected sound, weapons drawn as if they were anticipating an attack. Takumi had covered his mouth with his dirty sleeve, but it wasn't doing much to muffle the sound. If _that_ didn't attract attention, nothing would. Grimacing, Nerr rushed over to him, covering his mouth with one hand and pounding him between the shoulder blades with the other- admittedly, harder than she perhaps should have.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? You're going to give away our position! Hold it in!” She hissed, and the younger prince pushed her hand away, the leather glove now damp with saliva, gasping for breath.

“Go to hell.” He gasped, doubling over and wheezing. Azura dashed forward, lifting his chin so she could try and see him better in the dim lamplight.

 

“You don't seem very steady on your feet... Perhaps you should rest a bit.” He pushed her hand away as well, though much gentler than he did with Nerr, shaking his head and swaying slightly.

“N-no... I'm-- I'm fine... Can't... slow us down--” With a loud retch, he vomited explosively, spraying the paved road and their feet with hot bile. Groaning, he managed to stumble a few steps back before collapsing. Sakura pushed past her sisters to get to him, wiping her brother's sweat-slicked face with her dirty gloves as he trembled. Her fearful eyes took in his ragged appearance for a moment before ripping his stained, dark blue scarf away, gasping at what she saw there.

“Oh gods... oh gods, no, this can't be possible!”

“What is it, Sakura?” Azura leaned in close.

 

“Look at his neck!” Even from where she stood, Nerr could see the hives inflaming the younger boy's neck, dipping down into the collar of his robes.

“What is that? What does that mean?” Sakura trembled, sniffling.

“I-it's a type of sickness that I o-only thought was endemic to the coastal re-regions. H-he must've gotten it when we fought the g-g-Garou-- J-Jakob-san said they carry all kinds of illnesses... Oh gods... I sh-should've noticed earlier, I'm so sorry, nii-sama!” Moaning in pain, Takumi forced a weak smile at his little sister.

 

“D-don't worry, Sakura... It'll pro-- it'll probably go away on it's... own... Or-- or maybe Azura could s-sing for me. That helped l-last time...” The songstress shook her head, her expression tight with fear.

“I'm sorry, Takumi-kun. That song is more an orison than a potion.” The prince groaned and shut his eyes, while Sakura chewed on her lip, trying to think through her fear.

“Um... umm....! I-I think there's an herb that can help him, but--! But I don't know wh-where to find any here!!”

“Well, there's got to be an apothecary somewhere around here!” Hinoka declared, trying to mask her own fear with agitation. Silas nodded.

 

“Macarath has some of the best healers and apothecaries in Nohr- that's why King Garon holds court here. If we could find a healer--”

“They would alert the royal army and we would all be dead.” Ryouma stated bluntly. “If there's a palace here, _it_ would have a well-stocked apothecary.” His eyes scanned the skyline of the city, resting upon the spires and ramparts in the distance. At once, he began walking in it's direction. Nerr rushed forward, grabbing one of the the prince's coat tails and pulling him back.

“So your bright idea to avoid detection by the Nohrian army is to break into a Nohrian palace filled with, oh, I don't know- _Nohrians!?_ ”

 

“Yes.” The prince said simply. “After an attempt on his life in one city, I doubt he'd be anywhere but his main castle if it's as well fortified as you say it is. It's reasonable to assume the castle here won't be fully staffed, and I doubt a bunch of servants will be so eager to defend it that they'll engage us.” He began walking again, and this time, Nerr pulled him back so hard, he stumbled and hit the ground. Granted, he wasn't splayed out on the dirty street, but he did have to catch himself with his hands, giving his sister a harsh look as she glowered at him.

“No! We're _not_ doing that, you fool! What we're _going_ to do is find an apothecary and get whatever herb Sakura is talking about _without_ breaking into anything.” Climbing to his feet, the high prince frowned down at her, his crimson armor and the shadows playing about him giving him the air of a demon. But Nerr did not- would not- back down.

 

“I will not risk my brother's life on the chance that some anyan shopkeep will refuse to sell us what we need. I would rather take my chance fighting for a sure thing than waste time peacefully trying to obtain something we might not get.” The air between the blood siblings crackled with animosity. Silas, ever the level-headed peace keeper, stepped between them.

“Maybe it would be best if we split up and try _both_ things. Some of us can go look for an apothecary, and some of us can go scope out the castle. I'll take Lady Sakura and her retainers, and if we can't find anything, we'll meet you at the castle. If there's a military presence at the castle, you can fall back and meet us back here.” Sakura nodded, swallowing hard and trying to muster up her determination.

“I-I can do that.”

 

“I'm going with Ryouma; I don't think he understands what the term 'fall back' means.” Nerr crossed her arms over her chest, turning to Takumi's retainers. “You stay here with your liege and try not to lose him again.”

“I-I'm coming w-with you...” The younger prince groaned and weakly climbed to his feet, swaying dangerously. Hinoka reached out, grabbing his shoulders to steady him.

“You can barely stand, Takumi. You're going to make your fever worse.” He shook his head.

 

“I'm... fine... Just-- just put my bow in my hand if we run into any N-Nohrians... I'll take-- take a few of 'em out with m-me...” The Nohrian girl's lip twisted in disgust.

“You know what? You seem fine. If you have the energy to still be a hateful prick, you must not be too ill. I wouldn't break into a song for you, much less a palace.”

“Then why... don't you... just leave...?” He panted, eyes cold even when they were glazed with fever.

“If I didn't trust you to follow through on your delirious threats, I _would_.”

000

 

The king's palace in Macarath was nothing like Krakenburg, with open courtyards and walkways and no guards, apparently. Saizou and Kagerou, as skilled assassins, quickly found a side entrance that was easily jimmied open, leading to what seemed to be a servant's corridor, according to Jakob. Despite the fact that they were walking through dark halls that most people would not be privy to, it still seemed odd that they had passed _no one_. Nerr brought that point up to Ryouma, who actually agreed with her, the way he squinted in the dark making him look more forbidding than usual.

 

“We've probably just been lucky so far. A man like Garon wouldn't leave this place completely deserted.” Takumi began coughing again, quickly muffled but loud enough in the complete silence. From around the nearest bend, a surge of whispers echoed back towards them, and Nerr unsheathed her Yato. She had no intention of fighting, but she might need to scare someone away to make a quick escape. A dagger flung from the corner hit Ryouma's crimson breastplate, nicking the lacquer, but otherwise not harming him.

“Intruders! Show yourselves!”

 

“It looks like we've got company.” The Raijinto sparked to life as he pulled it free from it's scabbard as well. While he spoke, the Nohrian girl's eyes remained glued to his chest, or more accurately, to the frost beginning to branch out in fractal spirals from the point where the dagger made contact. “Brace yourselves and be ready for anything. King Garon could've left a trap waiting for us, or a monster, or--”

“Flora?” That voice sounded almost foreign after not hearing it for nearly five months, but her ears recognized it even if her mind immediately did not. A pair of identical faces peered out from behind the wall.

“Lady Nerr?”

“Lady Nerr!” Laughing, Felicia ran forward, her heels clacking against the tiles. She seemed heedless of the danger of the Hoshidans who's weapons were still raised, throwing her arms around Nerr's neck.

 

“We're under attack!” Oboro readied her lance, only for Jakob to force it back down.

“No, we're not. These girls are Lady Nerr's servants. What are you doing here?!”

“I think that's the question I should be asking _you._ ” By this time, Flora had approached as well, still holding a large knife and in no hurry to lower it. “Have you any idea how dangerous this is?” Takumi had begun coughing again, Hinata quickly dropping his katana to keep his liege steady. Nerr reached up past Felicia with her free hand, rubbing her temples.

“Trust me, Flora, I don't need you to tell _me_ that. Is there anywhere he can rest?” The peach haired maid pulled back a bit, smiling widely.

 

“Sure! Our quarters are just around this corner!” As Felicia lead them to this proffered sanctuary, the princess did not miss the dark look playing out over the other maid's face. Even when the door was locked and Takumi was sitting on Felicia's bed, the turmoil did not leave Flora's silvery eyes, though she did smile at her mistress.

“It's so good to see you again, Lady Nerr.”

“We missed you _sooo_ much.” The other sister said. Her hands were cold, but Nerr gladly allowed her to continue hugging her. She'd missed such things.

 

“Believe you me, the feeling is mutual. I missed you both. I miss everyone more than you could possibly imagine... except for Father.” She muttered to herself. “But what are you two doing here? If you're here, who's guarding the citadel?” Felicia finally pulled back, a slight frown marring her normally sunny disposition.

“Well, after you left, Prince Xander came and said that you were a traitor and wouldn't be coming back, so King Garon was sending everyone from the Northern Citadel to Krakenburg... and by 'everyone' I mean 'us' and the horses. About a month ago, we got orders to come here and that was it.” Nerr gripped her hand tightly, not realizing how much she had missed that icy touch.

“I am so sorry, you two. I know my staying in Hoshido has impacted a lot of people... but please, don't believe this slander they're saying about me. I'm no traitor; I would never turn my back on Nohr.”

 

“We know, milady. It's okay.” Flora leaned against on of the walls, idly rubbing her thumb over the hilt of her blade as she cast furtive glances in Jakob's direction. “Your absence really opened my eyes to what's going on in Nohr. As of right now, I'm just happy I don't have to see King Garon every day... He always requested _me_ to bring him his meals, and he would say how beautiful my hair was... It was awful.” She shuddered violently. Felicia frowned a bit.

“Even the king of Nohr sees what a great maid you are; what's so awful about that?” She did not seem to understand the discomfort in her sister's eyes, but Nerr certainly did. Her hands balled into tight fists, anger surging through her.

“That dastard! He can't hurt me directly, so he's going after the people I care about?!” The blunette maid smiled slightly, clearly trying to appease her liege's ire.

 

“It's fine, Lady Nerr. It's not like he did anything but talk. ...but I have to admit, I didn't think you'd return to Nohr, much less with Hoshidans in tow. Is there something we should know?”

“I'm afraid that story will have to wait.” Ryouma pushed himself away from the wall he had been leaning against and crossed over to Flora. “My brother is very ill, and we need medicine for him. Can you help us?” Gray eyes turned cold as ice as she looked up at the prince, her grip on the knife's handle growing tighter, frost beginning to snake across the blade.

 

“I don't think I can, what with you being the enemy and all. In case it has escaped your notice, this is a Nohrian palace- Hoshidans are not welcome to just waltz in and take what they please. The _only_ reason I haven't alerted the guards is because I don't want Lady Nerr to get in trouble.” Felicia and Ryouma gaped at her, aghast, while the princess nodded in approval. She was absolutely right- it seemed that the high prince easily forgot that they were not entitled to anything in this country but a quick death (though really, Nerr wanted to remind her maid, after hearing that she was a traitor, she should've alerted the guards regardless).

 

“Flora! How can you be so cold? Shame on you!”

“This is Nerrida's brother as well.” Flora looked over to the Nohrian girl, a brow raised in question. She shrugged.

“Technically. But don't feel bad, Flora; you're absolutely right to be suspicious of Hoshidans breaking into the palace. You don't owe them anything. Gods know they wouldn't simply allow Nohrians to break into _their_ castles...” The blunette sighed deeply.

 

“No... I'm sorry, Lady Nerr. I would not let any harm come to Princes Leo or Xander, so I should not idly stand by while your brother by birth suffers.” She unlocked the door, and stepped out, the others (save Takumi and his retainers) following. After a quick glance to ensure no one was coming, she began picking her way down the hall. “Nobody works at the apothecary anymore, but it's fully stocked. I'm sure I can sneak out whatever you need.”

“You would do that for us?” Ryouma asked, caught between skepticism and gratitude.

“No.” She told him bluntly, her gaze softening a bit. “But... I'd do it for Lady Nerr. After I get your medicine, my sister will show you how to sneak out the back door of the palace.”

 

“Thank you, Flora-san. You may be saving our brother's life.” His thanks seemed to make her uncomfortable, so the maid turned and began heading down the hall. The briefest crackle of magic was all the warning they got before a ball of flames detonated beside Flora, the energy of the spell knocking her into the opposite wall. The carpet beneath the blast burned away, as did the sleeve that had been closest to it, the pale flesh beneath blistering painfully. Felicia ran to his sister's side, summoning her own ice magic to try and relive the pain of the burn while everyone looked around for the source of the spell. A bright light illuminated the dark corridor for a moment before fading, leaving an afterimage of magical runes around Iago's figure. His dark robes blended in with the shadows as well, so that the pallid flesh of the left side of his face stood out like a spectre.

 

“Hello, Nerr. Happy to see me again?” She responded by grabbing the nearest object- a vase on a small pedestal- and hurling at his head. Even though the sorcerer cried out and covered his face with his arms, the vase passed through him, distorting his image as though hand had been waved through a plume of smoke. The fine porcelain shattered as it hit the floor several feet away.

“Okay, it's just nothing... and this is some kind of illusion, too.” Iago lowered his arms, a scowl twisting his painted lips.

“Oh, don't you just think you're so fucking smart...” He hissed, anger getting the best of him before he managed to recover himself. “You turn to violence so quickly. Where's the witty banter? One mustn't leap straight into battle without a little ban--” She cut him off by walking through his illusion, taking a moment to hop around inside the dark smoke, waving her hands to distort it further, before continuing on. _“_ _WHY WON'T YOU ACKNOWLEDGE MY EXISTANCE!?_ ” He roared at her. Ryouma leveled his katana with the illusion's throat.

 

“Give up. Wherever you're hiding, you're massively outnumbered.”

“Shut up, you byak devil! This has nothing to do with you! Also, you've been _badly_ misinformed; _you're_ the one who's outnumbered. Or did you think there _wouldn't_ be castle guards inside a castle?”

“Who the hell is this? The king's eunuch?” Scarlet asked, torn between trying to take this threat seriously, and unable to do so when they were talking to an effeminate illusion.

“Pretty much.” Nerr answer her. “This waste of pig parts is Iago. The better question is, how the hell did he know we were here?” The sorcerer smiled wickedly, pleased to finally have gotten some reaction out of the thorn in his side.

 

“Oh, Nerr... haven't you realized by now? I know _all_ you secrets...”

“What the-- Were _you_ the one that attacked us in Chevalier?!” He turned back to Scarlet, eying her in a bored manner, though he could not help but smirk a bit.

“Judging by your anger and ridiculous attire, I think it's safe to assume I'm speaking to the infamous 'Scarlet'. For so long, we thought you were just a fictional figurehead. But as much as I'm love to take credit for everything, I'm afraid most of it lies with one of your little friends. By the way, Miss Scarlet, thank them for me- when you scurried away from your little rat's nest with these byak savages, it made it SO much easier to exterminate the rest of the traitorous vermin there. We set up a pillory in the middle of Chevalier and put ALL of their heads there. It's really a beautiful sight; if you survive, you should go back and see it.” The Chevois girl's russet eyes widened in horror as she shook her head in disbelief. Iago's gloating smirk was cut short by a blast of ice magic going off in front of his face. Though the actual man was hidden somewhere, such things clearly interrupted his concentration, and the illusion blinked out for a moment. When it came back, the dark haired man turned to glare at Flora, who was back on her feet.

 

“Ah, dearest Flora. I didn't realize you were here- and your burdensome sister. You're so unimportant, you just blend into the background wherever you are. Got kicked out of the king's inner circle, did you?”

“You're just jealous because he liked me better than you.” She spat. Clearly, there was a grain of truth in her words, as Iago flinched at them ever so slightly, before his slimy grin was back in place.

“Oooh, saucy. I like it. Maybe I'll kill you last.”

“I don't know where you are, Iago, but I know you're here and I'm ordering you to leave. I am an official employee of this castle, and you are NOT. This is King Garon's royal villa, and you're trespassing. Your life is worth less than the coat racks here; His Majesty will not be pleased when you destroy everything with your bumbling ineptitude.” Nerr could not help but smile widely as she watched her maid belittle the horrid man before him, especially taking great pleasure in the way his face changed color, turning a sickly gray in his anger. He gritted his teeth.

 

“Look who thinks she has a spine... Trying to impress your dear ladyship? Well, impress her with _this!”_ He lifted his hand, the runes glowing around him once more as another ball of fire exploded, this time catching Flora in the middle of it. She screamed as her clothes were burnt away, blood red lesions erupting across her body. Just as quickly, the flames went out and she collapsed into a heap, breathing raggedly as she shook. Crying out, Felicia began trying to cool her once more, though there was not much anything short of healing magic could do for some of the deeper burns. Iago laughed cruelly. “You see? The king has given me free reign to do whatever I want as long as it gets results. Oh, don't cry, Lady Nerr.” He mocked. “She's just taking a little nap. Probably. Freesians _are_ weak against extreme heat, though. We'll see if she starts to melt in a few minutes.”

 

“I'll kill you, Iago! I'll make you suffer!” He teleported away before she could run him through. Not that it would do her any good, not when it wasn't his actual body. But if what Flora said was to be believed, he was somewhere in the palace. The blunette maid had strong magic in her veins, she could probably feel him. So Nerr just needed to find where he was. The sorcerer's voice echoed through the halls of the castle, mocking her as he alerted the guards to their presence.

“King Garon would like your head on a platter, Princess Nerr, and I'm not one to disappoint.”

“Damn it all!” Ryouma cursed, breathing hard through his frustration. “How in the hell are we to get Takumi's medicine now? We'll run straight into soldiers if we run around looking for the apothecary.”

 

“We don't even know what we're looking for, remember?” Nerr told him. “Sakura is the one who knows what it is and she's with Silas because we were supposed to scope the palace out and leave! Felicia. How many guards are in the castle?” The pink haired maid looked up, sweat beading on her brow from the exertion of trying to heal her sister.

“Oh, um... I don't know; I never counted! Uh... kind of a lot, I think.”

“And what do they think of me?”

“Nerrida, this is no time to worry about your image.” The prince scolded her, but she brushed him off, still looking at Felicia.

“Uh... they... don't, really. I don't think most of them know who you are.”

 

“Perfect. Then they'll only try to kill me on Iago's orders. If I find him and kill him, they'll leave well enough alone.” She turned to her steward. “Jakob. I need you to get out and find the others. Bring them here the same way we came in. Going through these halls with a massive battalion is begging for another massacre, so I'm going to go alone and try to find that dastard.” The butler shook his head vehemently.

“Milady, I must protest! I cannot allow you to--”

“ 'Allow me to'? I'm not _asking_ you; I'm telling you! Go find Silas and the others- tell them what's happening!” She had never snapped at Jakob before, she had never ordered him to do anything, she'd always requested... But he was wasting time with his over-protectiveness (at least, that was how she justified it to herself). Despite his stricken expression, her retainer quickly resumed his normal demeanor and bowed.

 

“...of course, Lady Nerr. I will return shortly.”

“Kagerou will go with you.” Ryouma said, and the dark haired woman nodded tersely. The prince turned towards his sister. “You're not going anywhere alone, Nerrida. I'm coming with you.”

“Me, too. I can take on these castle pussies.” Scarlet shouldered her serrated ax, and Nerr scowled at them both.

“No! That's exactly what I _don't_ want- you people want to kill everything that comes too close to you. These guards are simply doing their duty, and I won't let you _murder_ them because _we're_ trespassing!” Ryouma's dark eyes widened at her candor. The only way she could have been more clear with her feelings was if she had simply told him, “you're a murderer”. The high prince did not seem to enjoy being called out on his willingness to take Nohrian lives, his commanding posture slumping just a bit. His voice was unusually quiet when he spoke once more.

 

“...you have my word that we will make no attempt to kill any of the soldiers here. I swear it on my honor. Is that good enough for you?” Biting the inside of her lip, the Nohrian girl nodded. She would see how long he kept his word, how much good his honor was. She was about to take off down the hall in the direction Flora had been walking when Felicia called out to her timidly.

“Um, Lady Nerr? There's a training room northeast of here. That's where the mages assigned to the castle practice using fire orbs- I-I think Iago's probably somewhere over there...”

“You're probably right. Thank you, Felicia. You just keep an eye on Flora; everything will be fine.”

000

The hall she ran up led into a dead end, but opened to the east. Unfortunately, though there was more light coming from the adjacent corridor, it was teeming with soldiers, men and women carrying and swords and lances. The nearest to her, a knight in full armor, raised their lance and charged. The weight of said armor slowed them considerably, but also left them all but impervious to any attack she might have unleashed. Scarlet ran past her, her own armor clanking as well, though not as loudly, and brought her ax down on the haft of the lance. The painted wood splintered, but loosing the cutting edge of their weapon did not deter the knight. They thrust the impromptu stake towards the woman's face, cutting a large gouge into her cheek. Though she hissed in pain, it didn't stop her from swinging her ax once more, cutting a deep gouge into the guard's steel cuirass and knocking them back.

 

“Hey, I know I'm fantastic, but don't just stand there watching me. Go!” Not waiting to be told twice, Nerr ran for the end of the hall. A man with a silver sword charged at her, his movements more agile than most knights, but not nearly as agile as she was. She avoided his blow with ease, raking her own blade across his sword arm. Blood soaked into his doublet, staining the crimson even darker as he dropped his blade in pain, but she she had no time to see how much that slowed him down. An arrow whizzed past her head as the ground at her feet froze, her flesh sticking to cold tiles as ice engulfed her toes. A sorcerer and an archer appeared from another doorway, their worried faces relaxing as they saw their quarry was now immobile.

 

“Well, well, looks like we've caught ourselves an intruder.”

“Yeah. And you know what happens to intruders, don't you, missy?” Re-sheathing her blade, the princess pulled out her dragonstone, dropping to all fours as her limbs stretched and spine elongated. The ice encasing her shattered as toes grew into long claws that curled into a semblance of hooves. The castle guards blanched as they looked up at the beast standing before them; she could hear their hearts pounding against their ribs, could smell their fear. Spreading her wings wide, she lowered her head, leveling her horns with them.

“ _No. I DON'T. Why don't you enlighten me?”_ Whimpering in fear, the archer pushed his companion aside tripping slightly as he ran for his life. The mage seemed frozen by fear, his lips trembling pitifully.

 

Raising a clawed foot, she batted him to the side- not hard enough to maim, but with enough force that he's wouldn't get any ideas about trying to attack her again. She managed to cover a lot more ground in such a large form, and while she was not quick enough to avoid all of the attacks directed at her by the other knights and guards she passed, their weapons only left nicks in her thick hide and barely chipped her scales. Her powerful tail broke their bones like twigs, while her thick claws could shred their flesh like paper. Not enough to kill, though. _Never_ enough to kill... Despite the voice in the back of her mind telling her that, as long as they could stand, they could kill her. It was best to end them, the voice purred, best to destroy everything, reduce it all to ash and bone, break it _break it_... Like she had broken the Garou... Groaning, she smashed her head against the nearest wall- not enough to concuss herself, but just so that the pain searing through her skull drowned out the static hiss.

 

“Nerrida! What's wrong, are you alright?” Stumbling slightly, she looked over her shoulder ( _so_ much easier when her neck was three feet long), watching as Ryouma's white hot katana cleaved through another knight's armor. The man fell back, crying out as his arming coat began burning, too preoccupied with putting it out to focus on the fight. Her brother's expression was surprisingly concerned. Perhaps he simply remembered the last time he had seen her bashing her head against something. Blinking hard, she nodded.

 

 _“I'm fine. I, uh... got hit with a... thunder spell. I'm a little twitchy...”_ He didn't seem convinced.

“Then perhaps you should return to a less unwieldy form.”

“ _No! This place is like a gods damned maze- I can cover more ground this way.”_

“You're getting too far away form us, Nerrida.”

“ _Then keep up.”_ Turning her attention back to the forefront, she began running again, having to dig her claws into the ornately patterned tiles to keep from slipping as she ran. Water ran down her legs, pooling at her feet every time she stopped to send more mages flying and making the floor even slicker.

 

She had to find Iago before he called for more reinforcements. Nerr cried out in pain as ball of bright violet flames exploded around her, simultaneously burning and shocking- it felt as if someone had cast a fire spell on her while she was being hit by the Raijinto's thunder magic. The flames dispersed quite quickly, though- very much unlike normal magical fire. She twitched, and fought to stay upright. There were large holes in the wall across from her. Within the other room, she could see large crystal orbs that glowed with swirling violet fire. Sorcerers stood beside them, holding tomes open, their robes flapping behind them from the magical current in the room. Those must have been the “fire orbs” Felicia had warned her about- they seemed to be amplifying the mage's magic. Which meant that Iago was undoubtedly in the room as well. She quickly pressed her back to the wall, making herself a less obvious target. Fortunately for the guards, another target quickly came into view. She could feel the air crackle before she managed to find her voice.

 

 _“_ _Ryouma, look out!”_ The prince barely had time to notice her before the flames came hurtling towards him. A blur of red pushed him out of the way, and Scarlet screamed as the magic seared her skin, heating her armor until it glowed in places. She hit the ground hard, convulsing in pain. Ryouma stared in horror, before his face quickly reverted back to it's normal calm.

“Saizou, take Scarlet back to the hall whilst I deal with this.” If the shinobi felt any concern at the thought of leaving his liege to fend for himself, what little was exposed of his face did not betray it.

“Of course, Ryouma-sama.” The high prince quickly joined Nerr against the wall, on the other side of one of the openings as there was little room where she stood.

 

_“There are at least two of them in there. And that's probably where Iago is.”_

“Then I will take them both out. You aren't opposed to me putting anyone in a coma, are you?”

 _“They hit me with those things, too._ ” And she had the protection of thick scales and numbed nerves. She could only imagine the agony Scarlet was enduring at the moment. _“Knock yourself out.”_ Nodding tersely, the Hoshidan man edged closer to the edge of the wall, peeking around the corner and pulling back. He inhaled deeply, adjusting his grip on the Raijinto's grip. With a loud battle cry that bounced off the walls, he charged into the room. A loud crack of lightning was followed by an even louder shriek and a low rumble of thunder. One of the sorcerers fell to the ground, while the other flipped through the pages of their tome, attempting to channel their magic, but they could not act quickly enough.

 

“You deserve _worse!”_ A blur of red and white lunged at the other guard, their scream cut short. Iago's mocking voice scoffed loudly as another crack of magic resounded.

“Pft! What do you think _you're_ doing, minion? Bring on Nerr; I have some unfinished business with that little whore.” Gritting her teeth (in her mind, for she had none in this form), the Nohrian princess galloped into the room. Both sorcerers were on the ground, twitching and moaning in pain. Iago stood at the back, as far away from any threat as he could be. His purple lips stretched into a toothy sneer. “Well, well, look who finally decided to show herself.”

 

 _“I've never heard a coward admit to awaiting his death. I will make you suffer, Iago.”_ The dark haired man laughed contemptuously.

“Oh, what a delightfully pithy final statement from our heroine. Unfortunately for you, this is no fairytale, princess.”

 _“How's THIS for pithy?”_ She ran forward, anticipating his attack. A darkly clouded glow erupted before her, but with her long legs and wings, she managed to leap over it, tucking her head down just as she used to when she flipped back at the citadel.

 

Her tail cracked against Iago's shoulder like a whip, the sharp, plume-like scales at it's tip slicing through his silks and satins and cutting deep into his flesh. The sorcerer's high pitched scream filled the room as he stumbled, but to her surprise, he did not go down in one hit as she was expecting him too. His cold eye glinted cruelly as he channeled his magic, the power it exuded lifting him off his feet. As close as she was, she could not avoid it, the dark energy engulfing her. It seemed to be crushing her, sucking all the air from her lungs- she could feel her blood vessels bursting, her ribs fracturing. Suddenly, the force exploded outward. The pain, of everything being torn apart, was similar only to her first full transformation, when her limbs, not used to the unnatural stretching, burned as they were pulled from their sockets. Nerr screamed, hitting the ground. The agony of the attack pulled her out of her transformation, her trembling, broken limbs now distinctly human once more. Despite his own injury, Iago was laughing.

 

“Oh, was that it? Was that all you really had? This is the best moment of my life; this moment is so wonderful, I want to make love to it!”

“Silence, fiend!” Ryouma charged forward, his blade raised, clearly not intending to simply injure this one. Perhaps the king's aide saw that, for the air around him glowed and the air filled with acrid smoke as he teleported behind the prince.

“No no no, no interfering!” The samurai managed to duck quickly enough that the other man's next spell didn't hit him directly, but the shock waves it threw out tossed him across the room. Nerr's head was spinning from pain, every breath felt as though it might be her last- gods, what kind of cursed magic was this?

 

Still, even though she could feel that the muscles were strained and ligaments torn in her arm, she inched it towards the Yato's ridged grip. The moment her fingers closed around the worn brass, resolution flooded her veins. Iago was still gloating, telling Ryouma how he would enjoy slaughtering each and every Hoshidan that dared sully their castle. So engrossed with his ranting was he that he didn't notice Nerr lunging at him until her blade pierced his side. His complexion paled even further, his one visible eye widening at the sound of a commotion in the doorway. It seemed the others had finally arrived. The princess twisted her blade slightly, drawing his attention back to her.

 

“This is it, Iago. I just want to know one thing- answer truthfully, and I'll be merciful. Who told you we were here?” Even staring death in the face, the sorcerer was arrogant. He laughed weakly, smirking at her even though pain gripped his features. “I assure you, you have nothing to laugh about. Tell me now, and I'll let you keep your balls for when they bury you.”

“Or _what?_ ” He sneered. “Or else you'll have to doubt your own people? Right? You, betrayer of Nohr, are being betrayed yourself. _Again._ When will you learn that nobody cares enough about you to _not_ have something to gain by stabbing you in the back? I'd like to savor this moment a little longer, so... goodbye!” He spat in her face, and as she reeled, pulled her blade free from his side with a squelching sound. She had barely wiped her eyes before the room was once again filled with a blinding light and the acrid smoke of a warp spell.

 

“Damn it! He's still here somewhere! We need to find him--”

“Oh, I'm afraid that's not possible, _little princess_.” Judging by the hollow echo of his strained voice, it was being magically projected. “I almost feel bad for you. First one of those Hoshidans that you risked your life sparing- my sincerest condolences for his untimely death, by the way. Then that poor, stupid fool Zola- oh, it was love at first sight for him, he was infatuated with you the moment he laid eyes on you at the fete, did you know that? No? Oh, well- it can't bother him too much, what with him being dead too and all. And now, there's _another_ traitor in your midst. From this moment on, you'll never be able to let your guard down again- not that you should, being as universally loathed as you are. Who will stab you in the back this time? Oh, I bet it'll be your dearest friend, Sir Silas! He's already proven that he has no loyalty by betraying his country.”

 

“Shut up... _shut up!!!!”_ She covered her ears with her hands, unwilling to listen to him anymore. Those were facts that she had already known, but to hear them from his disgusting lips in his jeering voice was too much. She could not block out his laughter.

“Very well, Nerr. I wish you the best of luck; you'll need it.”

“Ugh...” Whimpering slightly, she dropped limply to her knees. Her head was throbbing- she would not have been surprised if Iago's spell had given her a skull fracture on top of all the other injuries she could feel. Everything was blurry and wavering, but she was clearly not the only one in pain. A high, familiar voice drew her attention, and she lurched towards it, only to fall back down. Her mind may have been determined, but her body had clearly reached it's limits. She could feel hot blood soaking into her tights again. A pair of maids walked into the room, Felicia supporting her sister. Though the wheals on her flesh had mostly healed, Flora was still uncomfortably red.

 

“Flora, are you alright?”

“Uhm... yeah... I-I think so. Are _you_ alright, milady?”

“I'm fine.” She lied easily. “I'm just sorry I couldn't kill that whoreson Iago. But at least he won't be back to bother you two for a while. I only wish I had gotten a confession from him about who this traitor in our midst was...”

 

“Oh, come on, Nerrida!” Takumi stumbled forward, a sheen of sweat on his face. How he had even managed to drag himself this far as ill as he was was a miracle in and of itself. “Do you re-- do you really believe that snake? We're your family, your _real_ family! He's just tryna... mess with your head...” He coughed, leaning against the wall. She just noticed the carved bow still held weakly in his hand. Had he really been intending to fight in his condition? She didn't know if he was brave, or just suicidally overconfident.

“...I don't doubt that. But it isn't as though liars can't ever speak the truth.” Takumi's brow furrowed as he looked at her.

“That's not like you at all. You usually trust everybody! At least... everybody from Nohr...” Groaning, he fell forward. Oboro caught him, her face stricken with panic.

 

“Oh no! Takumi-sama, is your fever coming on stronger?”

“Ugh... I feel so... sluggish...”

“L-let me through!” Sakura called out from the hall, squeezing between the people in the doorway and kneeling beside her brother. She pressed the back of her hand against his brow, pulling it away with a gasp. “Oh, no! His f-fever is spiking! We r-r-really need that m-medicine!” Breathing deeply, Flora nodded.

 

“Alright, now that Iago's gone and the guards are nursing their own wounds, I should be able to get into the apothecary. But... I still don't know what I'm looking for.”

“Of course. I-I'll go with you. Let's go!” Sakura jumped back to her feet, dashing back out the room. The blunette maid followed, a bit slower, still unsteady on her feet. Biting her lip, Felicia looked around the room, her gaze falling on the prince gasping for air on the floor. A resolute look formed in her eyes, and she kneeled beside him. At once, Oboro scowled at her, hatred marring her face.

“What do you think _you're_ doing, anyan?!” The pink haired girl gasped sharply, clearly hurt by that remark.

“I'm trying to help!” She whined, her lower lip trembling. Nerr crawled forward a bit, her own glare rivaling the Hoshidan's.

 

“Felicia can use ice magic. If she wanted to kill your stupid liege, she could just sit back and wait for nature to take it's course.” Her crimson gaze softened as she looked back over to Felicia. “Don't hurt yourself, Felicia. I can see you've worn yourself ragged taking care of Flora...” The maid smiled, bolstered by her mistress's concern.

“Don't worry, Lady Nerr. I can at least do this much. I can't just sit back while your brother's sick.” Rubbing her hands together, she laid them on his cheek, closing her eyes as she concentrated. The temperature of the air around them dropped considerably, and Takumi shivered. Nerr hoped that Sakura and Flora would return soon. Loathe the younger prince as she did, she certainly didn't want him to _die_.

000

 

Rinkah managed to move Takumi to one of the back rooms that Felicia showed them to, more of a storage shed with a cot than a bedroom, but also a place no lurking castle guards would be concerned with looking. Flora and Sakura returned shortly, carrying a jar full of some kind of red and green leaves. Orochi, a skillful apothecary, measured out a dose and brewed it into a tea. They had a bit of difficulty getting the younger boy to swallow it- it appeared the rash on his throat caused it to swell, but he managed to drink most of it. Still, it seemed to be taking too long for his fever to break. Felicia was exhausted, and even though she clearly wanted to help more, Nerr forbade her from using her powers. The last thing she wanted was for her maid to make herself ill trying to care for someone else. She suggested soaking the boy in an ice bath- she recalled that years ago, Gunther had done that to her when she'd been incredibly ill. As they waited for Ryouma and Tsubaki to deal with the younger prince, the Nohrian girl slumped against a wall, slowly sinking to the floor. She was so exhausted, both mentally and physically. She wanted everything to just _stop_ for a moment... Nerr hadn't remembered falling asleep, but she must have because the next thing she knew, she was waking up to the sight of Flora bandaging her feet. The maid noticed and smiled slightly.

 

“Good morning, Lady Nerr.”

“Oh, you're awake!” Felicia had been pouring a cup of tea, but as she looked away, the brown liquid splashed onto the crates they were using for a table. She poured the spilled tea from the saucer and brought it to her mistress, giggling slightly. “We were seeing about Prince Takumi, and the next thing we know, you're asleep on the floor! Some things never change, huh, Lady Nerr?” If she were being honest, she would have told the pink haired girl that she had not fallen asleep so easily in months, that the only reason she had this time was probably because nightmares had plagued her so badly that she hadn't slept at all for the last three days. But as she looked into Felicia's smiling face, memories from the citadel came flooding back into her mind, of happier days the other girl did not seem to realize were dead and gone. She forced herself to smile as well, but it felt stiff and awkward.

 

“Guess you're right, Felicia. Once a sluggabed, always a sluggabed.” She looked over to the bed, where Takumi lay breathing deeply, the thin coverlet pulled up to his chin. Sakura sat on another crate beside him. “Looks like I'm not the only one who needed a nap. It looks like the medicine worked?” Sakura looked back at her, her smile sincere though her face was wan.

“Y-yes. He should be fine now. He just need plenty of r-rest.”

“I'm glad. I feared it might have been too late when we finally returned. I suppose serious illness coming on quickly out of nowhere runs in your blood, Lady Nerr...” The younger princess frowned, looking between the Nohrian girls.

 

“Huh? Wh-what's she talking about, nee-sama?” Nerr waved her hand flippantly- even such a small movement hurt terribly.

“Oh, it's nothing.” While it was no secret amongst those who knew her from Nohr, she did not feel comfortable filling any of the Hoshidans in on that incident from nearly nine years ago. To distract herself from the memory of it, the princess looked back to Flora. “Thank you for helping us, Flora. I hate to think what would've happened had you and Felicia not been here. Very serendipitous...” Both maids smiled similar smiles at her.

 

“Please, don't mention it.”

“It really _is_ a good thing we're here. You look awful, Lady Nerr.” Felicia chided gently. “Look at the state of your clothes, your hair! I thought that Jakob was supposed to be taking care of you.” Yes, she often thought that too, but it seemed that her remaining retainer was taking on more duties in the Hoshidan army and less with her. That was alright, though; she would be selfish to monopolize his time. A small part of her sneered that she was _supposed_ to monopolize his time; she was his liege, he was supposed to pay attention to her and _only_ her. She looked away from the maid.

 

“He's very busy. Not to mention exhausted- we've been traveling for months...”

“But he is your retainer.” Flora argued, frowning slightly. “His duty should be to you alone. When I began healing you, it terrified me to see how many injuries you have that haven't been healed yet. That wound on your leg looks days old! How could he have neglected you so?”

“It's not-- he didn't-- ...it's not his fault, Flora. They just won't heal. Sakura has been healing me as well, but... it simply doesn't work.” Felicia's jaw dropped slightly.

 

“How is that even possible? I've never heard of healing magic not working. You usually don't even need to be healed, milady; I've seen you walk off compound fractures!”

“Now, _that's_ a bit of an exaggeration.” Nerr chastised her as Sakura giggled.

“Nee-sama _is_ very r-resilient. Um... I-I've heard of times when healing magic looses it's e-effectiveness... It really only sp-speeds up a person's natural ability to heal, so sometimes on older people, i-it doesn't heal them completely. Once time, Yuugiri-san broke her leg driving off a-a slaver caravan. M-mother tried her best to heal it, but it... it still isn't completely healed...” Nerr wanted to say that was ridiculous, she wasn't that old- she was only eighteen. Gods, had it really only been five months since her birthday? But then again, she hadn't known she was Hoshidan by blood and she hadn't known she was a manakete; was it really so far-fetched to believe that she was actually much older than she thought she was? The Nohrian girl lapsed into silence, which was soon broken by Flora.

 

“Um... forgive me if it's not my place to ask, Lady Nerr, but... what are you planning on doing next? Iago knows exactly where you are; it won't be long before he deploys troops to cut you off, and they're certain to put up more of a fight than these.” Her shoulders slumped miserably.

“Yes, that's definitely the case. Well, I'm still heading to the capital, but I need to consult a map and find another, more off-beaten route.”

“Oh. I see. I suppose I was hoping, if you weren't in too much of a hurry to get wherever you were going, that you would stop by our village first.”

“Ooh, that's a great idea!” Nerr blinked as she looked between the maids, one beaming, the other melancholy.

“Oh? Alright then.”

 

“But nee-sama, wh-what of Ryouma nii-sama doesn't want to deviate from his path?”

“Then he can go where ever the hell he wants.” She could not help her curt tone, even though her anger was not directed at Sakura. She was sick and tired of Ryouma's reckless plans. She was tired of running into soldiers and other threats. She was tired of life in general. Flora and Felicia had often told her about their village in Freesia, a large province that took up a great deal of... western Nohr, if she wasn't mistaken? Everything they said about it made it sound like a lovely place and, despite the war going on, she could use a vacation. Still, the invitation came out of the blue. “But... why, though?” The blunette woman twisted her apron in her hands- she had put on a new one at some point, as the one she had been wearing before had been burned by Iago. Frost snaked across the cloth.

 

“To be honest, I don't feel safe here anymore. You might have chased Iago away, but he could always tell the other staff and guards to do something to Felicia or myself. I want to go home!” Her normally calm, even tone was laced with misery and anger, but she quickly collected herself. “But it makes sense for you too, Lady Nerr. Freesia is an sovereign nation, _regardless_ of what King Garon thinks. You could take shelter there and plan your next move in peace. And, if Prince Ryouma and his soldiers decided to come as well, Lord Takumi could get some much needed rest there.” As eager as she was to jump at the call, those words gave her pause. Ryouma and his soldiers... Nerr gripped the hem of her sweater.

 

“Is that really a smart idea, harboring Hoshidan soldiers and a traitor to Nohr? What if Father finds out that your village is cooperating with us? Aren't you worried about what might happen?” Felicia laughed slightly, pulling a knife from her boot and tossing it in the air, catching it with ease. As clumsy as she could be with everything else, the pink haired maid took to blades like a fish to water.

“Don't worry about us, Lady Nerr! Our village will be fine; there isn't anyone there who can't hold their own in battle. Besides, if push came to shove, we could just freeze anyone who tried to invade solid!” The princess smiled wryly.

“I guess that's true. I'd forgotten how potent a Freesian wake-up call could be...” Felicia bounced on her heels, squealing with joy.

 

“Oooh, this is so exciting! I've always wanted to show you our homeland, milady! Remember how we used to dream about this, Flora?” The other maid was not nearly so exuberant, her smile tinged with sadness.

“Yes. Yes, we did... Serendipitous, indeed...” Nerr wondered why she looked so upset, but decided that after everything that had happened that night, it was too much to expect anyone but a bubbly personality like Felicia to smile. She took a sip of her tea. It was cold, weak, and much too sweet, meaning the peach haired girl had made it. Back at the citadel, she hadn't liked drinking anything Flora or Jakob hadn't made, but months out on the road quickly taught her that being picky was not pragmatic. Besides, these days, everything seemed to offend her senses.

 

The fact that Felicia had made it for her, probably devoting all her concentration and effort into not burning it, warmed her heart enough that she didn't mind the taste. She glanced back over to Takumi. When he wasn't sneering at or insulting her, he looked so young. It was hard to remember sometimes that he was actually a few years younger than her (maybe even a year or so younger than Leo). She climbed to her feet, wincing slightly as her stiff joints were reluctant to cooperate with her at first.

 

“I'll give that sluggabed a few more minutes to rest, then go tell Ryouma my plan. If he's got any sense, he'll listen to me.” A low groan that sounded like something a Faceless would make sounded from the bed.

“Ungh... be careful...” Takumi's voice was a hoarse whisper, his words slurring together so much she could barely understand him. The Nohrian princess sighed deeply.

“Oh, what's he on about now? Even when he's sleeping, I can't get a break from his mouth...” And she had just been thinking of him almost fondly.

“...nee-san... something's not... right... look b'hind... the curtain...” His mumbled words devolved into quiet snores, the only sound in the otherwise quiet room. Curtain, what curtain? Nerr looked around, checking to see if there were any curtains in the room, just in case. No, nothing but bare brick walls and cobwebs.

 

“He's delirious. That must be some fever dream he's having.” Sakura frowned, reaching out and pressing the backs of her fingers against Takumi's head, then against her own.

“He's not feverish. I don't know nee-sama; he sounded lucid for a second there.” Lucid people spoke nonsense, too. She had too many other things to worry about to pay attention to the prince's paranoid rambling.

000

 

A/N- Jeez, this was one of those chapters that was like pulling teeth. I'm really starting to hate the fight scenes in this story. I didn't mind them so much when I was doing 'The Rising Dark', but I think that was because there were some different victory conditions in 'Conquest' (I really loved the defend chapter in Dia, both to write and to play). Routing is getting boring, especially since I take units vanishing from the map as them dying, so I made this into a 'Defeat the Commander' type deal. Also, of all the things that bother me in this game, the fact that no one seems concerned with committing treason is one of the most worrisome. The game seems to flipflop between making the entire western part of the continent “Nohr” and breaking it up into individual kingdoms. I know Nestra and Chevalier are described as their own kingdoms at least once, even though that makes no sense considering that Garon orders massacres there in 'Conquest' and it just _happens_. You would think their rulers would be all, “Nuh uhn, not in MY house, bitch!” and send their own soldiers out to stop them. And you can't say Scarlet's resistance counts for that, because if it did, it wouldn't be a “resistance”, it would just be soldiers doing their job. However, it's clear that Macarath IS decidedly Nohrian since Garon has his own private castle there. If it were an independent nation, that wouldn't be _his_ castle.

That's one of many reasons why in MY head canon everything west of the chasm is Nohr, and everything east of it is Hoshido. There are duchies within it, but those are like states in the US- they might have their own laws and be self-contained countries for the most part, but they still answer to the one power in charge. Why am I bringing this up? Because the fact that in-game, Flora's perfectly willing to help strangers from the country they're at war with bothers me SO MUCH! Remember, the Hoshidans _are_ breaking into a castle they have no business being in- Garon's castle, no less! The people trying to kill them are completely justified in their actions, even Iago. When _Iago_ is doing the right thing, you KNOW something's wrong there. And I know they're doing it to get medicine for Takumi, but are we to believe there are _no_ other places in a large city that might carry medicinal herbs? But yeah, the people invading another country, killing border and castle guards who are just doing their job, committing genocide on the native species and breaking into castles so they can steal whatever they want- _THOSE_ are the good guys. At least in 'Conquest', they make it pretty clear you're playing as the bad guys. Here, dear reader, you locked yourself in to the chaotic neutral route when you started reading.


	14. Casual Lies

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Ch.14- “Casual Lies”

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Despite all the risks involved with breaking into a Nohrian palace, Macarath had been a blessing, with Flora and Felicia smuggling them supplies they desperately needed. After weeks of wearing wet, filthy clothes, they were able to find spares and wash their own, though many of the Hoshidans still groused about the Nohrian garb they had to wear, how uncomfortable and constraining it was. Nerr had just been grateful to put on clothes that weren't crusted with dried blood and offal and just disgusting filth in general. After stewing in the putrid combination for so long, she had been unable to notice just how bad she smelled. The day before they were scheduled to leave, Flora had led her through the back halls and ushered her into another room, it's tiled surface almost too bright.

 

“I thought you might appreciate a proper bath, milady.” It had been so long since the princess had even _seen_ a proper bathtub that she had to rub her eyes to convince herself that it was not an illusion. But no, the entire room was filled with warm, sweet-scented steam that wafted around her, coaxing her.

“Is this--? I don't think I should...” Was it really fair for her to indulge in such luxuries while the others had to make do with washbasins? It was funny how she never thought about things like that when she lived in the Northern Citadel; while there were more tubs in the fortress that her servants used, it never occurred to her how people of lower status and less wealth lived. Even though what she had was considered middling for royalty, it was so much more than what most people could dream of... And even though she had even less at the moment, that realization still made her feel very guilty. Perhaps seeing the turmoil behind her mistress's eyes, Flora laid a hand on her shoulder.

 

“ _I_ think you should, milady. This is technically _your_ palace as well, remember?” Nerr laughed weakly, humorlessly.

“Somehow, I doubt Father would agree with you...”

“Then he should not have claimed you as his child. To me, and many others, you will always be the second princess of Nohr. Besides,” Her expression darkened slightly, a small frown tugging at the corners of her lips. “You look exhausted. Even worse than you did after your endurance training. I think the reason you're not healing well is because you're too stressed. If you relax a bit, we may be able to do something about that gash on your leg. Not to mention your hair...” She muttered that last part under her breath, though Nerr's keen ears picked it up easily, the acoustics of the room helping greatly.

 

“What's wrong with my hair?” She reached a hand up, knowing at once that the sight of it was probably driving the blunette woman up a wall. Flora never could stand anything that wasn't neat and tidy- it was part of what made her such a wonderful maid. The sight of the matted, stinking, filthy rat's nest atop the princess's head must have been a thorn in her side. Honestly, though, despite her protests, Nerr was almost desperate to jump into the warm water. The thought of casting off the mantle of being a traitor, a killer, for just a few minutes was too tempting to pass up.

 

She undid her armor and set it aside, folding her clothes as she removed them as well (though probably not to Flora's exacting standards), and began undoing the bandages on her leg. The bruises had healed a bit more, and her skin was almost back to it's original hue, though the lower portion of her right leg remained blue and scaly. There were a few sporadic patches of navy hide on her left arm as well- it didn't seem like that was ever going to go away. Still, she didn't know what Lilith meant about it being damaging- the thick skin didn't even itch. Deciding she'd think about that later, if ever, the princess dipped her toes in the water for a moment before lowering her entire body into the steamy bath with a slight hiss. She wouldn't be able to stay in very long- she could feel the heat stinging her wounds, almost unbearably so. Breathing through her teeth, she carefully unclipped her hairpin, setting it on the tile behind her. After she was done bathing, perhaps she could scrub the grimy brass as well. Flora approached, carrying a bottle and a comb. She paused, looking down at the hairpin, an odd expression on her face, before it reverted back to her usual, pleasant mien.

 

“Milady certainly cherishes her belongings...” That had probably been a gentle prod, an invitation to get her to open up a bit more, or perhaps to just get flustered. The maid had always been so good at teasing her over her foolish infatuation with her retainer. But Nerr was in no mood to play that game at the moment.

“Yes.” She responded simply, her tone making it clear that the subject was dropped. Flora had also always been good at not pressing her boundaries... She knelt on the tile and began untying the princess's hair. It wasn't exactly tightly bound- she wasn't very deft with hair- but the tangled detritus in it had seemingly glued it in place. Though it tugged, the blunette was very gentle in her ministrations, just as she always had been.

 

“I'm a bit surprised you managed to take your armor off by yourself. I suppose it's quite a bit simpler than your practice armor, but still. You seem to be growing up, milady.” Growing up... even though she was a grown woman, having reached her majority five months ago. Even though she was older than Flora herself (only by a year or so, but still). Surely, that was how everyone had thought of her- as a child. Not that they could be blamed, however- it wasn't as if she had been able to do anything for herself. She couldn't cook or clean, or get dressed or do her own hair, or even leave her home without an escort holding her hand. She had been completely dependent on others until she was forced to take care of herself. Had circumstances not been as they were, she probably _still_ wouldn't know how to put her armor on or take it off without help.

 

“I had to learn.” She replied honestly. “After all, it's not like I could ask someone to take it off for me...”

“Except Jakob.” Flora said quickly, almost as a reflex. “Why would you _not_ ask Jakob; that's his duty, after all. Besides, I'm certain he'd flip with joy at the notion of you asking him to help you with such an intimate task...” There was something almost bitter about her voice that Nerr did not understand. Did the other girl perhaps think it untoward for a man to help a woman with her armor? But it didn't matter either way. The princess shook her head.

 

“He used to volunteer, but... then he stopped. He clearly doesn't want to waste his time on such tedious chores anymore, so I can't really bring myself to ask him.” Nerr fell silent for a long moment, the only sound that of the water gently lapping against the sides of the tub as she shifted occasionally. Suddenly, she drew her knees to her chest and wrapped her arms around them, a chill overtaking her despite the warmth of the room.

“...Flora?” She asked in a small voice. “Am I a bad person for being upset that Jakob has other friends now...?” Saying it aloud was really all the answer she needed; what kind of monster felt that way? Only a horrible person would resent their friend for having other friends, for having a life outside them... Even though she knew that, she could not help the way she felt, and it made her sick. Flora seemed to be mulling over the question in her mind, because when she answered, her words were slow, carefully thought out.

 

“...I don't think that makes you a bad person, Lady Nerr. People are intrinsically like that; we want the people we care for to notice us, to pay attention to us... to love us. ...I don't know if I ever told you this, milady, but I was always terribly jealous when my father praised Felicia. No matter how much she deserved said praise, it always made me angry, as though that meant he loved her more than me. That's foolish, of course; I'm sure he loved us the same, but... even though my mind knows that, my heart still wishes he had paid more attention to _me_.”

 

That was... unexpected. Flora rarely, if ever, opened up about herself to her mistress. Nerr never tried to force her to spill her guts, not sure if the other girl felt that was a boundary that shouldn't be crossed between them, or if she was just a secretive person, but didn't want to impose on her either way. Now, however, it seemed that maybe the maid felt much the way she herself did, and thought that her innermost thoughts and feelings were shameful and wrong... Her heart ached for the blunette, and she turned around slightly so she could look back at Flora. Her face was tight with pain, a pain that stemmed from her heart, judging by the tears dripping from her closed eyes. Nerr reached out, laying her hand over the other girl's, the water from her fingers leaving wet spots across her knuckles.

 

“I always thought you were the best.” She whispered earnestly. Gray eyes opened wide, staring at her for a moment, before they screwed tightly once more and the maid sniffled, bringing her other hand up to wipe away the tears coursing harder and faster down her cheeks. Nerr quietly turned away; had she been in Flora's position, she would not have wanted an audience as she tried to regain her composure. After a moment, the sniffling stopped, and the maid went back to work untangling her hair. There was silence, but only because nothing else needed to be said.

000

 

Leaving Macarath had been like waking from a beautiful dream and finding oneself passed out in a ditch. Though as they began heading west, Flora assured them that very few soldiers ever came out this way. It soon became evident why. Being winter meant they had snow to contend with nearly everywhere they went, but it was _nothing_ compared to what the lands around Freesia were like. Only cold lived along the vast stretches of what, at one time centuries ago, may have been fields. It was only snowbanks at present. And while their feet did not sink in very far, the ground beneath the thick, powdery snow was frozen solid. Felicia explained gleefully that since the snow never fully melted, it always froze every subsequent winter, resulting in the land being raised up. It _had_ felt like they had been traveling over a gentle incline. The old Nerr would have been horrified to learn that it didn't warm up enough to even melt snow in this frozen hell, but the current Nerr was too busy trying not to succumb to hypothermia to care about such things. Though she had procured new, warmer clothes in the palace, even taking Flora's advice and putting on a pair of high, leather boots, she could not stop herself trembling violently.

 

“Gods damn it all, I'm freezing my ass off out here. Quite literally; I think my ass succumbed to frostbite and rotted off a few miles back...” Flora, who along with her sister, was leading the group of soldiers, laughed slightly.

“I can imagine. You've always been weak against the cold, Lady Nerr. It feels great to me, but I know it's not for everybody... or even most people. Just hang tight; there will be a warm cabin waiting for you at the end. I may even turn down the sheets for you, for old time's sake.” Nerr smiled a bit at those words. She was well aware that, as a traitor to Nohr, she had no right to expect anything from anyone, but that her once-maid would offer these small luxuries made her feel like perhaps not everything was going to be as terrible as she had begun expecting it to be.

 

“Thank you, Flora. I have to commend your navigational skills as well. I know you said troops don't often come out this way, but I was still expecting Father to cover all his bases just in case. But somehow, we've managed to avoid running afoul of any soldiers.” Even though the blunette woman was facing away from her, the princess could practically see the smile slip from her face.

“No... I suppose we just got lucky...” Felicia nodded, turning around so that she could face her liege as she walked backwards.

“She's right, Lady Nerr; this was just the most direct route. I would've chosen the same route if I was leading us.” Flora shot her sister a withering glare, her eyes narrowed, her voice as cold as the snow at their feet.

“Why must you _always_ do this, Felicia? What do you get out of one-uping me; does making me look stupid make you feel better?” The peach-haired girl cringed away from her sister, her chipper expression melting into one of abject misery.

 

“I _didn't!”_ She whined, tears evident in her voice. “I wasn't trying to make you look stupid; I was just pointing out a fact! How can _I_ one-up _you_ ; _you're_ the one who's perfect. That's why you're Lady Nerr's lady's maid. That's why _you're_ leading us.” She sniffled, wiping her nose on her sleeve. At once, all the animosity disappeared from Flora's face, replaced with guilt. She reached out, wiping her sister's cheek with her own sleeve.

“I'm sorry, Felicia. I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. I don't know what's come over me...” Blinking away the last traces of her tears, Felicia frowned slightly.

“I don't either. You've been like this for a while now, sis. Why won't you tell me what wrong?” The other twin shook her head slightly as she mumbled.

 

“It's nothing...” Nerr could not help her own sigh as she watched the argument play out between her maids. Clearly, something was on Flora's mind, but she didn't feel it was something that could be shared. The princess knew exactly how she felt. She wondered, if she had been home, if nothing had changed and she still had her family- the family she knew and loved- around her, would she have opened up to any of them? Probably not; she didn't like them knowing her weaknesses. The only person in all the world she might have willingly poured her heart out to was mouldering at the bottom of the Infinite Chasm. She sighed again, deeper- it felt like her lungs weren't inflating enough to provide her with relief. It was a sign of how caught up in her melancholy she was that she didn't notice Ryouma catching up to her until he fell in step alongside her.

 

“What's wrong, Nerrida? You haven't seemed like yourself, lately...” Those were the first words he had spoken to her in days. Between Takumi's illness and Scarlet's injuries, he had been too preoccupied to waste energy having a one-sided conversation with his reluctant sister. Truth be told, she had been grateful for the fact; Macarath had been a time of rest for her, and she could not rest when that overgrown lobster was breathing down her neck. Even now... she sincerely wondered at times if he was actually concerned about her, or if this was all an act to get her to lower her guard around him for whatever reason. She honestly could not tell, and it peeved her to no extent. Regardless of his true motivations, her defenses rose whenever he came near on sheer instinct alone by this point.

 

“You wouldn't know 'myself', Ryouma.” The man had known her for all of two months (and a week), and they had barely exchanged two dozen words in that time. She couldn't say when he wasn't acting like “himself”, so how could he think to know what she was like normally? After all, all he saw of her was sullen and foul-mouthed; a complete stranger compared to the person she had been before waking up in Hoshido. The high prince crossed his arms over his chest, a ridiculous sight given that he was still walking, but actually nodded to her surprise.

“You're right. You've grown into a very different person from the sister I remember... but I've been around you long enough to know that you don't sigh that much, or that deeply, unless you're under some sort of mental strain. You were like that when we crossed the Chevois border, and again when we made our way down the mountain. Sometimes it looked like you were about to sigh yourself unconscious.” He paused, looking away from her, turning his attention to the star dappled sky. “...Mother did that, once. About a month after you had first been taken, when she was still trying to sort out her duties as empress dowager. She kept sighing, heavier and heavier, until her eyes rolled into the back of her head and she collapsed.”

“Gods above...” Nerr didn't know what bothered her more about that anecdote- the thought of her mother passing out from the strain of losing her child and husband in one day, or the knowledge that she _knew_ what that was like. She had felt herself get lightheaded sometimes when she breathed too deeply, felt the world sway and felt that, no matter how much she inhaled, she simply couldn't breathe. Ryouma smiled grimly, still in his memory.

 

“Fortunately, Yukimura was nearby and managed to revive her. I was terrified to be alone with her for a while after that. I understand now what happened, but when you're ten, you just think that at any given moment, your mother might keel over and die...” Ten... ten? So he had been ten when she was taken, when he had come to Chevalier and seen his father cut down in cold blood... She'd been about four at that time (maybe three going on four), so he was... six years older than her. That was a strange realization to have; to only now realize that all this time, she hadn't known how old her older brother was. Xander was twenty five-- no. Twenty six. She had been in Hoshido during his last birthday. She had been working on a new tabard for him, it was still in her drawer back in the citadel... She could have wished him a belated “happy birthday” back in Cyrkensia...

“Nerrida?” He probably would have stabbed her had she done that... A heavy hand on her shoulder, further weighing down her pauldron, pulled her from the mire of her thoughts. Ryouma was frowning slightly as he looked at her, though it didn't seem that he was mad at her directly. “...even _I_ can see that something heavy is weighing on your mind...” He wasn't going to let this drop. Then she would have to tell him _something_ just to make his stop pestering her. She scanned her mind for something she could say to the older man, some reason she could give for her despondence. She settled on the latest irksome thing to happen.

 

“Well, to be honest... our last encounter with Iago is still bothering me. I'd hate to think I can't trust anyone anymore, but I've been burned too many times before.” There. That was good. It wasn't a _complete_ lie; Iago's grim warning about the spy in their midst _did_ bother her to some extent, but the fact of the matter was, she really didn't trust anyone enough to lower her guard down around anyone in their retinue. If the sorcerer knew as much about what was happening as he claimed to, certainly he would have known _that_. This time, it was evident that the high prince's lour _was_ because of her directly.

“That's not your style, Nerrida. You're on your way to becoming a great leader, and you lead by example. Hinoka and Sakura often told me how you took charge while you were searching for Takumi and myself. If you don't trust your own people, how will they trust you?” As if perceiving her retort, Ryouma cut her off immediately, adding, “That goes for Hoshidans _and_ Nohrians. ...don't let what happened with this 'Zola' shake your confidence.” His speech had almost been rousing, right until the end. Just hearing the dark mage's name left a sour taste in her mouth, and her disgust was compounded by the fact that it was Ryouma saying it. She scowled at her blood brother.

 

“ _You_ weren't there- you were yukking it up in Chevalier when everything with Zola happened. _Don't_ talk about things you don't understand, Ryouma. And that's NOT my problem! This isn't about my confidence; this is a legitimate issue that needs to be dealt with. _Someone_ in our little tight-knit group is relaying information to... _someone,_ who is then relaying it to Iago. And by extension, to King Garon. Which means that, regardless of how much we plan ahead, they're always going to be two steps in front of us because they'll already know what we're planning.” Which honestly made it even more suspicious that they hadn't run into any soldiers. Suppressing a shudder, Nerr looked around, as though soldiers might simply pop up out of the snow at any moment. “Since you're the leader here, you need to sit everyone down, and interrogate them until whoever is the spy cracks.”

 

“Before we start mentally breaking our companions, let's take a step back, shall we? Do you trust me, Nerrida?” The princess looked up at the taller man. The snow appeared to glow in the darkness, the white of Ryouma's robes seemingly absorbing the light and refracting it back even brighter. The effect would've almost been angelic on someone less... pointy. She cast aside such silly thoughts, and looked deep inside her to find the answer to his question. Her lips turned down slightly.

 

“...no. Not really.” Her voice was quiet. Even though she spoke the truth, even though it was something she had been preaching all along, telling her brother to his face that she did not trust him felt... shameful. A small part of her wondered if Takumi felt like this due to his distrust of her. No, probably not.... “I know you're my flesh and blood and I'm supposed to love you, but it doesn't _feel_ like you're my flesh and blood. I have to remind myself we're even related. The truth is, I rather disdain you, actually. That doesn't lend itself to trust.” For a moment, Ryouma's stoic countenance slipped away, replaced with... Pain. Misery. Torment. It seemed that this was the closest she would get to seeing a grown man cry.

“...why is that?” Nerr wanted to look away, she didn't want to face him knowing that she had hurt him in such a way, even though she only spoke the truth. But looking away was imply that she was lying, that perhaps she didn't mean what she said...

“So many reasons! First and foremost, I don't _know_ you. I had a brother- I _have_ a brother- whom I love and cherish. I lived my whole life believing you were the enemy, being raised to see you as inhuman, wanting nothing more than to help cut you down. The first time I met you was after I had been stolen away from everything I knew and loved. My whole life had been shattered at that point, and I was dragged before you like a prisoner. Tell me, Ryouma; do you _really_ not remember your words, your attitude, during our first meeting? I thought I was there to be executed, and you _ordered_ _that_ like it was nothing!”

 

“I _never_ would have let anyone harm you, sister. I was just--”

“You were just _what?_ Trying to _scare_ me into believing you? That's exactly how King Garon raised me; every time I saw him as a child, he was just there to threaten and terrify me. _Everything_ you've done thus far is just like _him!_ You held me against my will, you wouldn't let me go back to the only home I knew, and even now, you're constantly trying to guilt me into staying. If you were in my place, would _you_ trust you?!” Silence fell, not just between them, but over the entire valley. It seemed her voice had carried, and probably everyone had just heard her rant. Breathing hard and shaking slightly, Nerr twisted her sweater between her hands, trying to fight the urge to bury herself in the snow. Just because what she was saying was true didn't mean she wanted the whole world to know. Ryouma's voice did not carry; she had to strain to hear it, and she was walking right beside him.

 

“...if I'm just like King Garon and you're so desperate to get away from _me_... why are you running back to _him?_ ”

“I'm _not!”_ She cried desperately. “I'm going back to my brothers and sisters, my family... _They_ weren't like that. _They_ never intimidated me, or threatened to have me executed, or set guards outside my room to keep me from running away!” Granted, she had never _wanted_ to run away, but the fact still remained.

“So you trust them. You wouldn't believe that _they_ could be spies. All right... How about Sakura and Takumi? They had nothing to do with how you were treated when you returned to Hoshido. Neither did Hinoka. Think about Azura, even Silas too. Are you going to sit them down on the off chance that one of them might 'crack'?” Nerr shook her head, picking up her pace to try and get away from him. Of course, she couldn't outrun the high prince unless she broke into a full out _run_ , what with his legs being so much longer than hers.

“Don't lump Silas and Jakob in with the rest of you. They're not--”

“Hoshidan?”

 

“...strangers. They didn't waltz into my life out of the blue and demand I give up everything I had to love _them._ I believe in them.”

“Really. How can you be so sure?” It seemed that Ryouma was growing more and more agitated by her continued distrust. Honestly, she preferred the prince angry-upset to sad-upset any day. “From what I heard, you hadn't seen Silas in so long, you couldn't remember who he was. What makes you think he won't betray you?” Gods, that was almost exactly what Iago had told her. Had he been giving her a hint as to their mole's identity? She thought of her smiling friend, always quick with a pat on the back or funny memory whenever she was struggling to keep walking forward, laughing in her face as the Nohrian army closed in around her, asking Garon if he could deal the killing blow... Nerr could not stop the strained whimper from leaving her throat, hands reaching up to tangle in her hair, undoing all of Flora's hard work...

 

“...nothing....” She whispered, feeling as though her chest was too small for her lungs again. “Nothing does; he could turn on me at any second...!”

“Nerrida.” A deep voice barely cut through the haze of panic in her mind, but she could feel Ryouma's hand gripping her arms tightly, shaking her slightly. “Calm yourself, sister. All this time, you could have suspected him of not being who he claimed he was, yet you didn't. Why is that?” Mostly because if she had to doubt the only two people she actually _trusted_ , she'd probably have lost her mind long ago.

“I-- I don't know... I just... didn't. I just... _know_ I can trust him. I _have_ to trust him!” Xander would have shaken his head, exasperated by her naïve way of thinking. Gut feelings were not reasons, he would've told her, and despite not wanting to hear that, she would've known her brother was right. _This_ brother, the Hoshidan one standing in front of her, did not chastise her for thinking like a silly child rather than a soldier. He nodded, as though she had said something sage.

 

“Precisely. This is both your weakness and your strength. You have a keen intuition and a natural charisma. ...Father knew that even when you were a child...” An odd bitterness laced his words, but they quickly reverted back to normal. “Yet you lack the years of experience needed to make calculated decisions. That is why _I_ make them.” Her breathing had slowly been returning to normal, but Nerr had to laugh at his words. He probably wasn't _trying_ to make a joke, but he seemed to have a natural sense of humor.

“ _You?_ Make calculated decisions? Oh, that slays me! Playing rebel while your country prepared for war, charging headlong into a swarm of soldiers, or breaking into a castle swarming with guards; which of these was the calculated decision? The only reason you have not _died_ so far, Ryouma, is because you were apparently born under a lucky star. Charisma and intuition are fine and dandy for winning people over at court, but actual _lives_ are at stake here. So I'm going to pretend that your point was 'Believe In Yourself' or something, and make a mental note to grill you _extra_ hard when we get to Flora and Felicia's village, because that whole conversation was suspect.”

 

“Gods damn it, Nerrida--” It seemed that _wasn't_ the point he was trying to make, but she didn't care. She could not tolerate another minute of their talk.

“Still, thank you for reiterating that absolutely _no one_ is to be trusted. I'll carry that in my heart until the day I die. Now, if you don't mind, this conversation is over.” Before he could argue that it wasn't if he continued speaking or some such, the younger girl put on a burst of speed, running past him, even past the twins. She could hear Felicia calling out to her.

 

“Whoa! Hey, Lady Nerr, slow down! We're almost there!” Even so, she didn't slow her pace until she reached what seemed to be a spire made of ice. Flora and Felicia often made such lovely sculptures in the winter, but this one was crafted with far more skill than what either of them could produce. The ice itself was so pure, it absorbed all the colors around it. She was tempted to brush her finger along one of the delicate spirals wrapping around it, but was both afraid she might break it, and wary of such a piece of ice. She could feel the cold radiating from it even from where she stood. She didn't want her finger to freeze solid and shatter.

 

“Lady Nerr!” Tearing her gaze from the sculpture, she looked up to see Flora approaching. The rest of the group was further behind. The blunette doubled over slightly, trying to catch her breath. “You-- you still run like a bat out of hell... don't you?”

“Sorry. I wasn't trying to get ahead of anyone; I just wanted Ryouma to leave me alone.” Straightening, the maid shot her a sympathetic look.

 

“You don't seem to get along with him... It strange, isn't it? That it's sometimes easier to connect with people who could otherwise be strangers than with your own flesh and blood?” Nerr linked her fingers behind her head, looking up at the stars. They seemed brighter than they had at the Norther Citadel.

“...even before I knew I wasn't actually related to my Nohrian siblings, I never really thought blood mattered too much. You and Felicia and Jakob and Lilith... you're all my family just as much as Xander and the others... more so than Ryouma and them...”

 

“I-- ...I'm honored you'd think so fondly of me, Lady Nerr...” Silence, broken only by the occasional breeze howling across the plains, fell between them as they watched the other draw closer. “...Lady Nerr, there's something that's been bothering me for some time, now... But I haven't known how to broach the subject, or if I even should at all...” The princess looked over at her, frowning in confusion. Flora seemed ill at ease, digging the toe of her boot into the snow packed at her feet.

“You know you can talk to me, Flora. What is it?”

“Where is Sir Gunther?” The maid's words were blunt and to the point, like Azura's usually were, and they stabbed into her heart like an ice pick. The worst thing was, the blunette didn't even seem to realize the pain she was causing, as she was still looking at her feet. “I didn't see him when we were reassigned to Krakenburg, so I assumed he stayed in Hoshido with you, like Jakob did. Only, he's not marching with you. I noticed that when you all settled in at the palace in Macarath; that's unlike him. I can't imagine he would take your betraying Nohr--”

 

“I didn't betray _anything_ , Flora.” Her voice was a harsh whisper; it hurt to speak any louder. Flora glanced at her from the corner of her eye.

“...well, even if you _had_ , that wouldn't matter. Sir Gunther would follow you to the ends of the earth; his loyalty to you knows no bounds.” Hadn't that been one of the things she had so loved about him? Hadn't he always reiterated to her as a child when he whispered lullabies to soothe her nightmares, _If all the world should hate you, let me shield your eyes; for as long as I live, I'll be evil by your side..._? Would he have stood by that promise, she wondered? Would he have stayed in Hoshido with her as eagerly and willingly as Jakob and Silas had? Would he then drift away from her too, leaving her all alone...?

“Lady Nerr?” The cold of Flora's hand penetrated her quilted sweater much faster than the wind did, and the princes shook her head.

 

“I'll never get the chance to test that loyalty. Gunther died some time ago, Flora.” The unfeeling tone of her voice disgusted her. She should've sounded sadder; being sad on the inside didn't feel like it counted in this situation, especially given the maid's reaction, how she gasped, how her eyes widened in shock, in disbelief... Nerr wanted to emote like that too, but she suddenly felt like she was centuries old.

“W-what?! How, _when?!_ ”

 

“When we were at the Chasm. He was murdered. By Father's personal guard. On his orders, apparently.” She turned towards the maid, hands balled tightly into fists though her face felt stiff. “Do you see, Flora? Do you see now why I 'betrayed Nohr', why I was reluctant to return home, to heed the beck and call of such a man? He took my father, my mother, my--” She stopped herself. Flora knew exactly how she felt about her deceased retainer, but it was still something she wasn't comfortable saying aloud to her. The blunette girl was blinking rapidly, and it took Nerr a moment to notice the tears streaming down her cheeks, freezing as they coursed down her chilled flesh, forming little icicles.

 

“I... I'm so sorry, Lady Nerr... I-- I'm so sorry...!” Unable to say anything more, she buried her face in her hands, sobbing quietly. The air around her grew colder as flurries began kicking up, the snow growing thicker until it resembled a mini blizzard. Despite the fact that she was quickly loosing feeling in her extremities, the princess could not move, too taken aback by everything. Not the self-contained snowstorm- those had been a constant in the Citadel, a calculated risk when living with people who had ice magic in their veins. No, the fact that someone other than her... was crying over this. Even Lilith, despite her obvious lament, did not shed tears. Perhaps she cried in the solitude of her astral plane, but Nerr could not witness that. An actual display of grief outside her own... she'd honestly never expected that. She wanted to thank Flora, for being sad about this, for being a reminder that something _important_ had been lost, but that sounded as disturbing as it did macabre even in her own mind. Fortunately, she was saved from having to say anything by the arrival of the others. Azura shivered so violently, they could hear it, wrapping her new cloak as well as her long hair around herself to ward off the chill.

 

“Goodness, it's so much colder here than it was back there. Is a blizzard coming on, should we be worried?”

“That's not a blizzard; that's my sister.” Felicia dashed up, frowning as she noticed the frozen tears and her sister's red eyes. “Flora, what's wrong?” Sniffling, Flora quickly brushed away the ice on her face, forcing herself to smile, though it did not conceal the sadness she felt.

“Oh, it's nothing, Felicia. Lady Nerr and I were just... reminiscing...” It was clear the other twin did not buy into that, her blue eyes narrowing in suspicion.

“...well, maybe don't reminisce so hard next time, okay? We don't want anyone to freeze before we get home.” She turned to the other, her smile coming back. “It's just about half a mile from here, everyone! Come on!”

000

 

The Ice Tribe's village was surrounded by a forest of firs and pines, their greenery the only color not in shades of white and blue to be seen. As they approached the tall, wooden gates, the pair of sentries standing guard immediately raised their weapons, but lowered them, lowering themselves into bows as Flora stepped forward. Nerr wondered if Freesians treated _all_ their people with such respect, but it seemed unlikely, given that neither Flora nor Felicia bowed in return. A wind kicked up, and the princess shivered, drawing her mantle tighter around her.

 

“Brrr! Wh-where's that warm cabin you promised us, Flora?” The blunette smiled slightly at the other woman, stepping past the threshold of the gate.

“Just a minute, Lady Nerr. I need to check with the village elders; we're usually suspicious of outsiders, and I don't want anyone mistaking you for enemies.” Azura's thin limbs were shaking, and she reached up to rub some feeling back into her cheeks.

“Oh, please hurry back. We're freezing out here!” With a quick nod, the maid dashed off towards the village, kicking up snow as she ran. Nerr groaned, the mere _sight_ of snow making her even colder.

 

“Ugh, how can anyone actually _live_ here?” Felicia giggled slightly as she looked back towards those shaking from the cold.

“Heehee! You're just sensitive to chills, Lady Nerr. Your family seems to be, too. When you're born here, you don't even notice how cold it is.”

“The ice magic in your veins probably doesn't hurt...” She muttered. Hinoka pressed herself against her steed's flank.

“I could live here all my life, and I'd still get hypothermic. We need some blankets and a roaring fire before we freeze solid.” The peach-haired girl's smile dimmed a bit, and she looked back towards the village, biting her lip slightly.

“Well, hopefully, Flora will be back shortly. I don't want anyone to think that the Ice Tribe doesn't know how to treat it's guests... Oh! Speak of the devil, here she is now!”

 

Indeed, Flora had returned, flanked by several large, muscular men carrying axes and swords. Nerr's stomach sank at once, but she tried to convince herself that things probably looked worse than they were. After all, people couldn't just approach the castle without being checked out by guards; why should she assume it was different here? They probably just wanted to make sure that the soldiers entering their land weren't going to be a threat. Needless to say, the Hoshidans were not working to make themselves look less threatening, immediately reaching for their weapons. The blunette Nohrian's eye narrowed as she noticed that, but Felicia stepped in front of her, smiling, apparently oblivious to the ominous atmosphere that had descended on them.

 

“Flora, everyone is freezing; it's adorable! But we should really get them inside so they can warm up. We wouldn't want Lady Nerr getting chilblains on her toes again!” The calmer twin closed her eyes, a brief expression of something, either pain or sorrow, flitting across her face.

“Felicia... I'm sorry...”

“Huh? For what?” The words had just escaped her lips when the wind kicked up, colder and biting, cutting into them like knives. A cry went out amongst the Hoshidan and Nohrian soldiers as they tried to make themselves as small as possible to present less of a target for the blizzard. Despite not wearing more than a few strips of leather and thin shirts, the Freesians didn't bat an eye as the snow dusted them.

 

“Gods, what the hell is going on?!” Takumi's long hair was coming undone in the strength of the wind, blowing into his face and obstructing his view too much to aim his holy yumi.

“This is _her_ doing!” Ryouma spat bitterly, hand on the gilded hilt of his Raijinto. The snow blinding him would not stop him from charging forth, but Felicia did, jumping between the high prince and her sister.

“Stop it! Leave her alone! It's not her fault!” She turned back to Flora, a desperate, pleading look on her face. “It's not your fault, right, Flora? I-I don't know why you're so upset, but you need to knock it off!” Opening her eyes, their gray depths as cold as the wind around them, Flora gripped her sister's arm, tugging her into the village and towards the guards.

 

“I can't. Felicia, get inside. _Now!_ ” She reached into the depths of her own dark cloak, pulling out a long misericord, it's silvery surface frosting in the cold. “I can't allow Lady Nerr to live. She betrayed our king and kingdom.” Felicia's jaw dropped, a look of incredulity overtaking her face.

“You _can't_ be serious! Since when have we ever cared about what King Garon thought!? We're autonomous!”

“Our land is still within Nohr; Nohr's traitors are _our_ traitors.”

“Why you little--! Flora, this is madness!” Jakob pushed forward, his dark eyes blazing with rage. The blunette cringed away from him slightly, but otherwise, would not be deterred.

 

“ **No.** It is our king's will. Stand aside Jakob, or I'll be forced to kill you as well.”

“How _dare_ you...?!” Gritting his teeth, the steward pulled out one of his knives, gripping the handle between three fingers and hurling it towards his former colleague. Felicia screamed as the blade turned over in the snow, drawing ever closer to Flora's face. The other girl didn't blink, simply raising her hand. The gleaming steel shattered suddenly, as though it had been made of spun sugar, broken pieces of the blade falling harmlessly to the snow. It was clear Jakob was not expecting that.

 

“Even steel balks in the face of the cold.” Inhaling deeply, Flora looked up, her face hard. “Very well. I offered you an escape. If I have to kill all of you... then so be it.” Nerr had been silent the whole time, her ears hearing what was being said, but her mind refusing to accept it. She shook her head, mindless of the cold burning her ears and nose.

“No... no, this _can't_ be happening... this _isn't_ happening!” She ran forward, ignoring everyone's cries for her to not dash into the arms of the enemy. She gripped Flora's hands, paying no mind to the dagger she still held as she looked into her maid's eyes. “Who's making you do this, Flora; Iago or Garon? Are they threatening you!? I can keep you safe, I promise! Just let me help you!” For a second, it seemed that her plaintive cry had gotten through to the other woman, it looked like her expression was softening... But just as quickly, she turned to ice once more, ripping her hands away and pushing Nerr back. Caught unawares, the princess stumbled from the force and fell backwards in the snow.

 

“I don't need your help. I am doing this of my own volition, because it's the _right_ thing to do.”

“Flora, what is _wrong_ with you?!” Felicia pushed past her sister, grabbing her mistress's hands and pulling her back to her feet. “Lashing out at your liege; have you no shame?!”

“She isn't my liege, Felicia, and she's not yours either! We are heiresses to the Ice Tribe, proud warriors, not gods damned servants! Open your eyes, you silly twit; she doesn't even _like_ you! You're nothing more than her laundress, but you'd turn your back on your country, your people, to defend her!?” Doubt, fear, and misery all played out across Felicia's face as she looked back to her sister. Nerr was tempted to push her forward towards her people, back where she belonged, lest she end up on the wrong side of this altercation, but the maid surprised her by stomping her foot in the snow, fists clenched at her sides.

 

“Yes! Yes, I would, because I took an oath! I know damn well who I am, Flora, but I still swore my loyalty to Lady Nerr. I'm not going to turn my back on her because the dastard who stole us from our home in the middle of the night doesn't like her! In fact, that should give us _more_ incentive to stand up against him!” Flora's eyes widened in shock, her lower lip quivering for a moment before she regained her resolve.

“...You're brave, Felicia. You follow your heart, consequences be damned... but I do not have that luxury. _I_ must do what is best for our people, and that's killing the traitor. Soldiers! To arms!” The houses within the confines of the border opened their doors, men and women armed with everything from swords and bows to shovels and pitchforks, poured out. Behind her, the Hoshidans were readying their weapons as well, not intending to back down from this new threat. Nerr shook her head.

“No... no! We're not fighting here! We have no business with you people! Ryouma, Hinoka, lower your weapons.” They made no effort to do any such thing, the elder princess's grip tightening on her nageyari as the flames lapping at it's blade grew brighter. “Lower them! Draw back!”

 

“We can't do that, Nerrida. These people are clearly in collusion with King Garon. If we back away from them, they'll probably hunt us down themselves to spare him the trouble.” Ryouma's voice was grim, his eyes hard. Gritting his teeth, Takumi summoned the bowstring of his Fuujin.

“I _knew_ we shouldn't have come here. Nohrians are never nice for no reason!” Flora, who had been pulling back, further into the throng of warriors, stopped for a moment to glare at the prince.

“No, what you shouldn't have done is come to Nohr. If you had just stayed in your own damn country, none of this ever would've happened!”

 

“Flora! Flora, come back!” Nerr tried to push forward, narrowly avoiding getting her arm cut off by a burly fighter as he swung his ax. “I know this isn't your doing, Flora, I _know_ Garon is making you do this! I can help you! Flora! Are you listening to me?!” The blunette stopped, breathing hard.

“...no. I'm _done_ listening to you... Nerr.” And with that final, cryptic message, she vanished in the throng of people. Between the howling wind and her pulse pounding in her ears, Nerr could barely hear the people behind her. Sakura's timid voice wavered.

“Wh-what do we do, nii-sama?” Hinoka answered in her brother's stead.

“The only thing we can do; make damn sure these people know who they're messing with so they don't try selling us up the river _again_.” The Hoshidans cried out their agreement, and charged forward, weapons raised. The Freesians, however, would not simply fall on their blades, and met the onslaught with a show of force of their own. Blades clashed as battle cries were caught and lost on the wind. The Nohrian princess continued shaking her head; this wasn't right, the Ice Tribe wasn't their enemy. She needed to find Flora and set this right.

 

“Felicia!” She reached out, grabbing the maid's arm and pulling her closer. Her cheeks were damp where tears were, even now, running down them, freezing into slush against her chilled skin. “Where is your sister, where would she be?”

“I-- I don't know! Pr-probably with Father- he-- he's probably the one who ordered this attack. Father always hated outsiders...”

“Well, where are they?!”

“Um...” Biting her lip, Felicia glanced around at the fighting going on before them. “Uh... On the other side of the lake. That's where our meeting hall is. It's on the other side of the village...” Inhaling sharply, the princess let go of the other girl, pushing past those fighting to force her way into the village.

 

Within the borders of the settlement, the blizzard raged even stronger, making it so that a haze of white covered everything. She could hear the battle raging behind her, the clang of blades striking each other, the cries of pain as people were injured, but she could not see anything. Fear tingled up her spine, making her shiver more so than she already was, and Nerr unsheathed her blade. She didn't intend to use it, but holding the ridged hilt in her hand made her feel a little better. Every step she took was slowed considerably, not just by the strong winds pushing her back, but also by the snow she trudged through. Occasionally, her foot would meet no resistance and she'd stumble, falling through snowbanks up to her knees, even hips at one point. It was impossible to tell where she was going, only that the sound of fighting were growing fainter with every step. A hand reached through the haze, grabbing her arm, and she screamed, heart racing as she tried to get away from the disembodied limb.

 

She hadn't taken half a step before she was no longer on solid ground, her weight continuing to pull her down. Nerr couldn't even hear the splash as icy water engulfed her. The cold burned her, overwhelming her nerves and setting them aflame in agony. Everything was dark and murky, but she could make out something thrust into the water before her face. She did not know what it was, but her mind, already growing sluggish from the cold, told her to reach for it regardless. Weakly, she scrambled for the shadow, feeling as though she were moving her arms through molasses. Fingers curled around her hand, and she could feel something pulling her up, out of the water. As cold as the lake had been, the air above was even more unbearable, and Nerr wished that she could sink back below the surface to spare herself the cutting chill, but several pairs of strong arms wrapped around her, heaving her onto the snowy bank of the lake. Felicia was beside herself with fear and misery.

 

“Oh, Lady Nerr, I'm so sorry! I was trying to warn you that the lake was there, but I scared you right into it!”

“I-i-i-it's.... I-it's f-f-fine...” She tried to keep her teeth from chattering, but was unable to. At least now, she knew she was going in the right direction, but... “H-h-how do we g-g-get p-past it...?” Flora was somehow on the other side.

“Our father usually freezes it when he needs to get past.” Well, that didn't do them any good. Nerr tried to get back to her feet, stumbling and falling back to the ground as her legs gave out from under her.

“Th-the others...”

 

“They're making their way over here.” Silas's voice was even, though his head seemed on a swivel, looking to and fro, waiting for another threat to come from the nothingness that surrounded them. “I don't know who they'll be able to; I can't see a damn thing, and people are jumping out of nowhere.”

“Nearly everyone in the Ice Tribe is a trained warrior. Ohhh, _why_ is Flora doing this...?” The girl moaned, rocking back and forth on her knees. Nerr was about to say she didn't care either way, when the faint sound of crackling cut through her addlepated mind. She looked down at the lake. Given the severity of the blizzard, she could only see about two feet in front of her, but she was certain the dark surface was slowly growing lighter, whiter... Ice branched across it's surface, locking together to freeze it solid, the frost eventually reaching the shore. This time, she was not alone in her screaming as a group of people erupted from the blizzard, their weapons raised. Felicia curled into a ball, hands thrown over her head as the wind picked up even more around her, enough to stop even the other Freesians. It gave them enough time for Silas to grab the princess by her elbow, heaving her to her feet and over to his steed.

 

“Get on, get on!” That was easier said than done when her clothes were frozen to her skin and sapping her of what little strength she had left, but Nerr managed to unceremoniously pull herself up. The cavalier climbed up behind her, applying the spurs and driving Plavo onwards.

“Wh-what about Felicia?!”

“They won't hurt her; she's one of them. I'm more worried about what they'll do to us!” Silas was correct in his worry, for a pair of arrows shot through the flurry, one lodging in his arm, the other in the destrier's upper leg. Whinnying in pain, the horse reared up, dropping both it's riders. The knight cried out as well, as the arrow in his arm was driven in even deeper before the shaft was broken off.

 

Faint shadows, growing darker and more defined, drew closer, until Nerr could see the archers, their cloaks buffeted by the gales. They were pulling arrows from the quivers on their backs, but she would not afford them the chance to notch them, redoubling her grip on the Yato as she forced herself to move forward. Her swing was wide, and had she been aiming to kill, would have been grossly ineffective, but as it were, she was simply trying to stop them. As the Freesians ducked out of the way of her wild swinging, they had no time to ready a counter attack, nor avoid the arrows whizzing through the snow. Both hit the closest archer, sinking deep into his chest. With a pained gurgle, he hit the ground, steam rising from his wounds. Whimpering in fear, the other turned and ran, only for the massive blade of a naginata to come swinging through the white like a demon's scythe. A bright red mist caught on the wind as his throat was slit, and fell as well. A pair of feminine voices reached her.

 

“Oh... did I do good? I think I did good...”

“Damn straight you did good. Fucking Nohrians, think they can lead us into a trap. I can't wait to find that blue-haired one and give her a piece of my-- Oh, hi, Nerrida-sama!” Oboro's rant was cut short as she nearly walked headlong into the princess, who was currently glowering at her, her own hateful expression replaced by one of fear. Perhaps it was because the sounds of fighting were still rather far off, and Hinoka's absent-minded retainer was the backup she had. But Nerr didn't have time to terrify her tentative allies.

“Where's Jakob?” She asked, bitterness creeping into her voice. “Since you and he seemed glued at the hip, as of late...”

“Uh... he's back there, with Takumi-sama.” The lancer jutted a thumb back towards the expanse of white. That did anyone little good. As much as she wanted to call out to her retainer, she refrained, remembering the way the steward had attacked Flora (or at least, tried to) without warning. She needed to talk to her once maid, not incite a riot against her. That was already being carried out behind her. Turning away from Oboro and Setsuna, the princess headed back in the direction of the lake. Silas was tending to his mount, and looked up at her.

 

“Nerr? Where are you going?”

“Flora's over there. I have to talk to her.”

“You'll be ambushed!”

“It wouldn't be the first time. I have to talk to her.” Ignoring the knight's continued protests, she approached the lake, putting her foot atop it's frozen surface. The ice cracked slightly- either it was quickly melting, or else, it hadn't been frozen well to begin with. Breathing deeply to calm herself, the princess re-sheathed her blade, reaching instead for her dragonstone. When her bones had broken and reformed into their more draconic form, she stepped onto the ice once more. No creaking reached her sharp ears this time, though she could see the ice continuing to melt. She didn't have much time. Taking off in a canter, she made use of her wings, hoping that when she flapped, the extra lift they provided would help her get across faster. Another, albeit, smaller group of Freesian warriors appeared from the blizzard, mages and fighters. One of them dropped his weapons as he looked upon the dragon before him.

 

“What the fuck is that?!”

“It's _dead,_ is what it is!” A mage flipped open her tome, the pages glowing, illuminating the haze around them and not much else as balls of bright lightning were hurled at her. Flapping hard, Nerr managed to lift herself enough to leap over the spells, momentum carrying her forward. Rather than wait to touch the ground once again, the princess instead reached for the heads of the nearest warriors, kicking off of them. There was a loud crack as the ice suddenly broke, unable to withstand the force, and the Freesians screamed as they plunged into the lake's depths. It was likely that the cold wouldn't kill them... but the water certainly could. Still, as the draconic girl continued flapping, trying to stay airborne until she could reach the opposite bank, she did not have time to feel sorry for them. After all, they were trying to kill her... She shouldn't have felt anything.

 

Once her scaled knuckles touched solid ground once more, the princess let go of her dragonstone, shrinking back to a more familiar form and tucking the rune back into her bag. On this side of the lake, the blizzard seemed less intense, enough so that she could see more than a meter in front of her. There were in fact more warriors, who raised their weapons and charged at her the moment they noticed her, but Nerr would not let them deter her. Pulling the Yato free once more, she ran forward, slashing at those who got too close, though never aiming to kill. She could see Flora up ahead, standing in the alcove of a large structure. She clutched a tome to her chest, her eyes closed, hair whipping around her, free of it's confining pigtails. She was too busy controlling the blizzard to pay much attention to her surroundings, or so it seemed. As Nerr drew closer still, the blunette opened her mouth, her voice carrying above the howling wind, though her eyes remained closed.

 

“...are you here to kill me, Nerr?”

“No!” She called out, sheathing her sword and hoping her former maid didn't notice the blood staining it's blade. “I just need to talk to you! Flora... why are you doing this? There has to be a reason...”

“I _told_ you already! You betrayed Nohr... betrayed us all...” Getting closer, the princess held her hands out.

“I _didn't!_ And even if I did, that shouldn't matter! I'm not your enemy; can't you see that? You need to call this off, Flora. I know you say you're doing this for your people, but they're getting slaughtered out there by the Hoshidans!”

 

“...the Hoshidans that _you_ led here...!” Gritting her teeth in frustration, the blunette woman finally opened her eyes, the wind dying down around her as she cast her tome aside, the dark leather covers falling open, exposing the pages to the snow. She tightened her grip on the knife she still held and dashed forward. All the practice she had deflecting blades, both in theory and on the battlefield, did her no good with so short a cutting edge. She was used to dealing with long, heavy swords, and Flora knew that, ducking below her blade and getting in close. She swung, not at the princess's chest which was covered in armor, but at her soft, unprotected belly. Curving her spine allowed Nerr to dodged the majority of the blow, though the dagger's finely hewn edge still managed to cut through the padding of her sweater, the ice cold tip scraping against her skin, drawing a thin line in her flesh that stung. Wincing slightly, the princess looked up at the other girl, reaching out with her free had and grabbing the maid's wrist to keep her from attacking again.

 

“I know this isn't you, Flora! This isn't the real you...”

“You don't know the 'real' me.” She hissed, twisting in the other woman's grip and raising her leg, driving the sharp, metal heel of her boot into the princess's stomach. Caught off guard, it was easy enough for Flora to pull her hand back, raising it high, ensuring there'd be enough force behind her blow to kill. An arrow shot through the night gloom, glowing a pale green and striking her palm before dissipating in a gust. Crying out in pain, the bluenette dropped her weapon, and Nerr wasted no time reaching out and grabbing one of her arms, forcing her to the ground. As Flora fell into the snow, the other woman followed suit, digging her knees into the back of the girl beneath her and grabbing her other arm, pulling them both back at a painful angle. She cried out in pain, but Nerr ignored her.

 

“I'm sorry, Flora, but I need to hear it from you; what is Father threatening you with?”

“Nothing!” She screamed slightly as her arms were pulled even further back, the tendons and muscles of her chest and shoulders twisting painfully.

“Stop trying to get answers from her, Nerrida.” Takumi sneered as he approached, kicking one of the maid's flailing calves. “She's just in league with the rest of Nohr- she's probably the one who told that Iago freak we were in Macarath.”

“Shut up, Takumi!”

 

“Sister!” Felicia's voice called out from farther back, flurries kicking up around her as she ran towards them. Breathing hard, she collapsed in the snow beside her twin, her cheeks flushed from exertion. A large bruise covered the left side of her face, and Flora gasped as she noticed it.

“Felicia.... h-how did that happen? Who hurt you?”

“Um... I-I think it was Sven... I couldn't be sure, but I remember that bully...” The blunette bit her lip, turning her face away as best she could in the snow. Nerr released her arms slightly.

 

“Is this really protecting your people, Flora? Letting them turn on your own sister? Who will they turn on next; _you?”_ The girl beneath her shook her head, mumbling something under her breath. “How can you trust King Garon more than me? You know I'll do everything in my power to protect you, Flora--”

“You _have_ no power; you _can't_ protect me! You can't protect _us_. You can't protect anybody!! You're just as weak and worthless as I am!” Flora wrenched her arms free of the princess's grip, rolling over onto her back and pushing the other girl off. At once, Takumi readied his bow, but the maid made no move to attack. She simply sat there in the snow, her shoulders shaking as she sobbed quietly. “Garon said he'd destroy our entire village if I didn't cooperate...” Felicia reached out, gripping her sister's shoulders.

 

“Don't you see, Flora? He's evil! That's even _more_ reason why we should stand against him. Lady Nerr's not our enemy.” The older twin pushed her sister away, anger flaring up on her face beneath the tears.

“How stupid can you be, Felicia?! There is no standing against him! That's what our father tired to do, and what did it earn him? A traitor's death!” Both girls present gasped at the revelation. Felicia trembled slightly as she stared at her sister with wide eyes.

“Wh-- what are you talking about, Flora...?” She looked away, over to the tome still lying in the snow. The anger slowly faded from her face.

 

“...After we were called from the citadel... when I was supposed to head to Macarath, I broke away from the entourage I was traveling with and went home instead. Father... he was readying a rebellion, he said he would tolerate the king's tyranny no longer... But they always say, if you speak of the devil, he will appear...” Sniffling piteously, Flora wiped her eyes on her sleeve, her breath coming in sharp gasps. “Someone in our village must've told him what Father was planning, because Garon was already waiting for us at the gates with his soldiers. Father was so strong, I thought nothing could stop him... he couldn't even get a hit in! It wasn't even a battle, just a-- a _slaughter!”_ By that time, the blunette girl had broken down completely, weeping bitterly as she covered her eyes. Felicia remained silent, dumbstruck, as tears surged down her own cheeks, dripping onto her dark mantle.

 

“Father... Father's _dead..._?”

“...and you're working with his killer to try and stop the people who would make him pay for his crimes?” Even though his voice was quieter than usual, Takumi's usual disdain had not been tempered. Flora looked up at him, hatred showing through her sorrow.

“...don't you _dare_ criticize me, Hoshidan... Garon said if I didn't kill Lady Nerr and all the traitors that stood with her myself, he'd finish the job and burn my village to the ground with everyone alive to feel it! I had to think about my people, my _sister!_ But _you_ wouldn't understand that, _you_ wouldn't understand having to sacrifice a few for the good of many, you stupid, selfish byak savage...!” Nerr could definitely see why someone would think Hoshidans didn't understand the concept of sacrifice, but she certainly did. It was exactly what she should've done, had she not been such a coward herself; she should've come back and risk death rather than let those she loved suffer... Reaching out, she took her former maid's hands into her own, not certain if her minimal warmth was comforting or not, but hoping the contact at least was.

 

“I commend you for your choice, my friend, but... do you really think he'd keep his word? Do you truly not believe Father wouldn't just come back and finish the job once I was dead?” That was _exactly_ what the king would do, and as Flora nodded, it seemed she was well aware of it herself.

“I know the word of a murderer means nothing. I just... I just thought it would buy us some time. That it would buy _me_ some time. He gave me thirty seconds to make a decision, and I knew what he would do if I didn't go along with what he wanted; my father's body was still warm. ...it's no wonder he was always so disappointed in me; if I were a stronger warrior, I would've chosen death rather than shamefully betraying someone who showed me kindness...!”

 

With those words, she began sobbing again. Sniffling loudly, Felicia reached over and pulled her sister into a hug, rocking her back and forth even as she spluttered on her own tears. By that time, the others had reached them, their clothes covered in a red blotches that seemed to be from their own injuries in some cases, the blood on their weapons slowly freezing as it dripped into the snow, leaving a crimson trail behind them. Takumi was filling his siblings in on what he had overheard, but Nerr had no interest in hearing the story again. She gingerly picked the abandoned tome up, brushing the snow from it's pages. The heavy parchment was damp in places, causing the ancient ink to bleed slightly, but other than that, it seemed fine. She brushed her fingers over the worn, leather cover. Given the way Flora had clutched it, it had probably belonged to her and Felicia's father. Yet another one of Garon's victims. How many families did he have to tear asunder before he was satisfied? The older twin's voice was muffled by her sister's shoulder, but snippets of her laments could still be heard.

 

“...all my fault... I deserve to _die...!!”_

“Oh, Flora...” The princess reached out, tucking an errant lock of hair behind the other girl's ear. “This is not your fault. There was nothing shameful about what you did.”

“Personally, I disagree.” Jakob was pressing a wad of bloody rags to a cut on the side of his head, and scowling down at the maid. “You have been _beyond_ foolish, but...” His expression softened ever so slightly. “What's past is past, and there's no need to dwell on it. We survived, as did most of your villagers, so now, it's time to regroup.”

 

“Now that you all see first hand what kind of monster King Garon is, perhaps you can lend your aid to our cause.” Ryouma said quietly. Beside him, Scarlet nodded fervently.

“Yeah, in Chevalier we've already got one resistance. Nohr's soldiers might've taken down some of us, but where one falls, two more rise up. And if every duchy rises up against him, we can bring his despotic reign to an end!” Slowly, Flora looked up at the Hoshidans.

“... _what_ resistance in Chevalier? Are you stupid, do you think any scraps of your hobby group are actually left? All the rebels there are _dead_ , _all of them,_ as are most of the civilians. There are no remnants left, and no one would be idiotic enough to even _think_ about resisting now. Iago bragged about that to us, how he went house to house, personally extracting anyone rumored to be sympathetic to the resistance... Men, women... children...” She pulled away from her sister, reaching out and taking the tome Nerr held, tracing her fingers over the runes on it's cover. “And it'll be the same here. Resistance or not, we failed- _I_ failed- and now he's going to come back and make good on his promise. There's no standing up against Garon's might... All you can do... is not give him the satisfaction of killing you, and go out on your own terms... That's what I should've done the moment he threatened me. ...I'm so sorry, Felicia...” With that final whisper, she pushed Felicia back, getting to her feet and flipping open the tome. Arcane symbols filled the air around her, which began growing hotter, shimmering and distorting until...

 

“GYYYAAAAAA!!!!!” It was impossible to tell which came first, the ear-splitting scream or the flames, but they quickly melded together.

“FLORA!!!”

“Oh gods, put it out, put it out!!!” Scrambling to her feet, Felicia rubbed her hands together, frost spreading over her gloves as a small blizzard kicked up. But it did not put out the flames, rather, only served to fan them and blow away the smoke that might have offered a quick reprieve of suffocation. Jakob grabbed her hands, pushing them down.

“Stop it! You're making it worse! We need water! Gods, won't someone bring water?!” Drawn out from the trance set by the flickering flames, Scarlet and Hinoka set off on their respective mounts towards the lake, hopefully in search of buckets as well. Azura rushed forward, the stone set in her pendant glowing as she attempted to use her own water magic, but the flames simply sputtered and crackled as the water touched them.

 

Flora's dark cloak had burnt away completely, and the skin beneath would smolder as it was doused in water, only to reignite. Nerr ripped off her own cloak, wishing it was larger, and threw it over the girl, trying to smother the flames. Though the former maid's hair was completely burned away, the potent stench it left behind remained. She tried to wrap Flora in the dark cloth, tried to ignore how the flesh on her legs blistered and popped, the thin line of fat between the skin and muscle sizzling like bacon in a hot pan. But the flames would not stop, she already knew that. She had seen enchanted fire back in Krakenburg, when her father had burned that Hoshidan soldier alive. She knew it did not stop until it's caster ended the spell... or it's target was reduced to charcoal. But still, even though she could feel the flames eating through her cloak, beginning to singe her own flesh, burning away the fabric of her sleeves and gloves, Nerr did not release her hold on the writhing girl, pushing her down into the snow, hoping that the melting water might at least _help_. Her palms were beginning to blister as well when a pair of strong hands pulled her away.

 

“Nerrida, get back!”

“NO!! I have to help!”

“You _can't!”_ Ryouma was holding her back, just as he had done when she'd tried to run to Xander back in the Hoshidan plains months ago. She wanted to yell at him that, instead of stopping her, he should be helping, but no words would come; her throat was choked with tears as she watched Flora's writhing slow to the occasional jerk and twitch... before stopping completely. At once, the flames went out, leaving behind a charred husk amidst the melting snow, smoke wafting up and carrying away on the icy wind. Felicia screamed, pulling at her hair in anguish as she fell to her knees.

 

“NOOO!!!! FLORA!!!! Sis... please, wake up!!! Tell me this is just a bad dream...!!!!” Of course, the blackened body remained voiceless, ash crumbling from it's scalp and fingertips to meld with with melting snow. Someone was retching violently, but the sound of it, as well as the sound of murmurs and wailing, all seemed to fade into a staticky drone in Nerr's ears.

 

She could still hear flames crackling and popping, though there was no fire to be seen. The sound wedged it's way between her ears, growing louder and louder until she could hear nothing else. It wasn't the flames she'd just seen, lapping at her mind; it was the flames she had deflected from Kaze as the king tried to immolate him the same way he'd killed the other Hoshidan. Flames that singed her hair and blistered her knuckles. Her father-- no. No, he was her father no longer. _Garon_... he was so similar to flames. So powerful, so capable of doing good... but utterly destructive when left unchecked. Destroying everything in his path, and leaving nothing but death and ash behind. Flora had been absolutely right; she had no power. She couldn't protect anybody. She only brought death closer to them, like the carrier of a plague who was cursed to never be afflicted by the sickness they spread. But, as the gods were her witness, she could get their revenge. She no longer cared about going home. The heart of her home had been ripped out and set aflame. No, all she wanted now was to pay Garon in kind for all the suffering he'd wrought.

000

 

A/N- Whoo, another rout chapter. That's my _favorite_ thing to write -sarcasm detector explodes- Seriously, rout chapters are the most _boring_ thing on the planet to describe, so I didn't and instead, I turned the Ice Tribe village into the original Silent Hill, because imagine how freaking awesome that would've been to fight in an Fog of War map. There's never any mention of Garon killing Kilma in the game (it's strongly implied, however), so I threw that in, too, and really; why would Flora be a maid when she's no longer working for the castle? She can reclass into a sorcerer, why not let her be one to honor her dad? And also, my _gawd_ , could anything screw with my suspension of disbelief more than Flora's heartfelt speech _while she was on fire?!_ Man, I don't know if it's because I dislike this chapter in game so much or what, but I just wasn't feeling it. I mean, I've also been kind of ill and was pretty much sleep-typing this, but still- I've sleep-typed other things, and they came out okay. Hopefully, the next chapter will get me back on track


	15. Esoterica

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Ch.15- “Esoterica”

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They could not get away from Freesia fast enough. While most of the warriors within the Ice Tribe's village had not been killed, it was a fact that many of them _had_ perished, along with one of their heiresses, the other reluctantly fleeing with the Hoshidans and Nohrian traitors who had instigated the attack with their presence. As much as they all wanted to lay the blame for what had happened at Garon's feet, the fact remained that _they_ were the ones with frozen blood on their hands. Felicia and Jakob led them northeast, away from the permafrost and towards an expanse of heavy forest that seemed to stretch on for miles, a natural border wall. It was dense and dark, and after days of running, Ryouma dictated that they should set up camp and rest as much as they could. For Nerr, that would be not at all. When she wasn't running, even when she had slowed only to a brisk walk, her brain would start to itch.

 

She could still hear the sizzling crackles and pops of rendering fat- it was stuck in her ears, like a macabre tinnitus. Even her vision seemed to waver as though she was looking through a fire, but she knew that, at least, was merely a symptom of the constant migraine she'd been battling for the past two days. More than once, she had to stop running to vomit, the horrible burning in her stomach and throat only temporarily relieving the mounting pressure in her skull. They'd stopped to rest only once before reaching the dark woods, and as she sat on the frozen ground, she looked down at her legs, noticing that the dark cloth of her tights (she'd had to change out of her sodden, icy ones, lest she catch her death of cold) seemed to be glittering in the pale moonlight. It looked as though she were covered in dark oil, and as she leaned closer she realized that she was swarming in ants. She remembered seeing such a sight when she was little, more than once, when she had gone investigating the latest gods-awful smell choking the massive corridors of the Northern Citadel. She remembered finding the rats, tucked behind vases and suits of armor or wedged in too small cracks, swarming with glittering coats of ants that tore away all the meat and left only bones and tufts of fur behind.

 

Nerr screamed as she tried to brush them off, but the ants only crawled onto her arms, her face, intending to devour her just as they devoured everything else that was dead and decaying... She woke up to find Silas shaking her violently, the sound of her own shrieking filling her head. She hadn't even realized she had fallen asleep, but it gave her great incentive to never do that again. When Ryouma asked what she was having nightmares about, she remained silent. Any sane person would've already come to the conclusion that the sight of one of her dearest friends slowly roasting alive before her eyes would be enough to haunt someone even in their dreams. She saw Flora's body, the blackened skin cracking like the crust on a roast, enough when she was awake. The Woods of The Forlorn, as they were called, housed a massive mausoleum where they decided to take refuge. Well, the Hoshidans rather reluctantly. Sakura and Takumi had to literally be dragged into the weathered marble crypt, both of them citing complaints of ghosts and monsters and ghost-monsters. Nerr found herself, if not relaxed, then at least contented, in the tomb. With it's stone walls and minimalist interior, it reminded her of the Northern Citadel. It was probably the last time she'd ever be reminded of her home- it wasn't as if she could ever go there again. Not now, not when it only held sad memories of the life it once had.

 

If they had just stayed away from the palace in Macarath, if they had never seen Flora and Felicia there, they wouldn't have dragged them into Garon's schemes... Felicia wouldn't be crying constantly... Flora would still be alive... The Nohrian princess found herself caught in that looping train of thought for the umpteenth time late one night (or perhaps early one morning- it was impossible to tell what time it was in the utter darkness of the forest), when the sound of something slicing through the air before hitting a target with a dull 'thunk' pulled her from her thoughts. Getting to her feet from the corner she sat in, Nerr slowly picked her way between the legs and bodies of the other people sleeping around her. Some were conspicuously absent (Jakob and Oboro, she noticed right off the bat), but that was not her problem. She was not the commander of a regiment that needed to perform bed checks. The woods were as dark as ever, though small wil-o-the-wisps and glowing Jack My Lantern mushrooms provided a faint bit of illumination. It was more than enough for her to see- she'd grown up in this sort of darkness, after all.

 

As such, she could easily make out Takumi standing in front of one of the massive trees, holding a plain, iron yumi in his hand as he took aim, letting his practice arrows fly. She'd seen him like this once before, back in Hoshido, practicing far away from the prying eyes of others. Back then, she had tried to speak to him, only to be shot down. She would not make that mistake twice. Instead, she remained where she was, half in the shadow of the mausoleum, watching him silently. It was hard to believe he had ever been so sick; if she hadn't seen him on death's doorstep with her own two eyes, she would've assumed he was faking it... for... whatever reason. Just so they had to break into the palace in Macarath. Just to give them an excuse to kill more Nohrians. She knew that was foolish, but even so, the thought gnawed at her mind, wrapping tighter around it, coiling like snakes until she could no longer shake it. If he hadn't gotten sick... if they had just been able to push forward... If he had just died instead... The woods seemed to be growing darker, as if the few lights available to them were loosing their luminosity. Her gums itched, and the pain in her head seemed to be growing sharper the longer she watched him. If he had just died...

 

“You shouldn't have done that!!” Nerr barely had time to recognize the voice yelling behind her before something hard collided with the back of her head. Not as hard and heavy as the mace Rinkah had clubbed her with all those months ago, but still hard enough to make sunbursts explode before her eyes as she stumbled forward. Throwing out her arms to catch herself caused her to realize how lopsided she was, her left arm much larger and longer than the right. She hadn't even noticed it transforming- usually, the pain was too much to be ignored, but this time, she had felt nothing as the bones distended and the skin hardened. Still, she ended up on the dusty ground, color flooding back into her vision even as pain radiated from the back of her skull. Takumi had noticed the commotion and was running towards her, or rather, towards Oboro, who was standing there with a naginata in hand. The rough wooden shaft was splintering slightly. The lancer glared down at the princess at her feet, the shadows cast over her face by the lazily floating flames made her hatred even more unnerving to behold. Jakob was also running up to her, reaching her before her liege and shaking her by the shoulders.

 

“Oboro! Are you _crazy!?_ What are you doing?!”

“What am _I_ doing? I'm protecting Takumi-sama! She was about to attack him- I've seen that deformity enough times on the battlefield to know what it means!”

“Wait, _what?_ ” By that time, Takumi had reached them, and was looking with confusion between his retainer and his sister. “When the hell did you even get here?”

 

“Oboro, you just attacked a princess!”

“I was just doing my duty!” The yelling, coupled with the agony in her head, was making it impossible for Nerr to gather her thoughts. It felt like her head was full of millipedes. Jakob, it seemed, had not even noticed her. For so many years, whenever she fell, he was always the first one there to pick her up. Now... now, he was too busy yelling at the Hoshidan woman to spare her a second glance. Regardless of who he was yelling at, Gunther would _never_ have let her just _lie_ _there_ on the ground like a forgotten pillowcase... Flora would _never_ have ignored her... Gritting her teeth, the Nohrian girl pushed herself back to her feet, stumbling slightly at first as the world seemed to tilt under her, and stalked past Takumi to head deeper into the woods. She didn't care if she got lost. She'd rather be in the company of ghosts these days, anyway.

000

 

As it turned out, Nerr did not make it very far. In fact, she had stopped at a small bridge over a murky swamp and had swung her legs over the side, letting her feet dangle in the cold, slimy water. She'd removed her shoes first, of course, deciding that she had worn them long enough. There were no chilblains on her toes, and though the nails of the right ones were dark and unsightly, so was the rest of her foot, so she must've been okay. Even though the water was cold and disgusting, it soothed her slightly. And the chill, at least, kept her awake. There had been no blood on the back of her head, but she could feel the goose egg growing beneath her hair, and did not want to risk slipping into a coma... _again_. The feeling of her hair, still mostly combed through but just beginning to tangle, turned her stomach.

 

With hands that shook either from the cold or from her ragged nerves, the princess gripped a handful of her long ponytail with one hand and drew the edge of the Yato's blade across it with the other. It passed through the hair so easily, it was almost easy to ignore what she had done... at least, until she lowered her hand and saw the dark teal locks falling over her knuckles like the withered stems of long-dead flowers. She had always been so proud of her hair, even though (despite her best efforts) she had never managed to grow it out to Camilla or Elise's length. Now, as she untied it with her other hand, she noticed that, save for the braids that had wrapped around the tail, it didn't even brush her shoulders. She probably looked like a real Hoshidan now; it seemed that long hair was more common on their men than women. Grinding her teeth together, she dropped the hair into the bog below her, watching the strands sit on the water's surface before sinking below. Flora had been the only one to care if it was in disarray. She didn't need it anymore.

 

Nerr wasn't sure how long she had sat there, mulling over all manner of unpleasant thoughts and no-longer happy memories, before the others made their way to her. Silas and Felicia were the first ones at her side. The maid had begun crying, sniveling that when she'd woken up and been unable to find her mistress, the first thought that had run through her mind was that _she_ was dead too. It killed Nerr to think that she had caused the poor girl any undue distress, and she apologized wholeheartedly, though when Jakob approached, acting as though he were concerned for her well being, she promptly ignored him, even pushing him away when he tried to heal her. She had been worried about having a concussion the night _before_ , when the pain shooting through her skull had been sharp, rather than the dull throb it was now.

 

She was fine now, though Ryouma clearly didn't believe her when she said that aloud. Still, they had rested enough, and needed to continue making their way to the capital. Felicia, eager to think of something other than her miserable memories it seemed, volunteered to lead them, stating that she knew the area quite well. Given that the maps Ryouma had only listed the area with a massive crossbones, her navigational skills were welcomed. Still, even though the maid seemed quite confident in her directions, Nerr could not shake the feeling that they were walking in circles. The gnarled trunks of the massive trees seemed to be repeating in pattern every few steps, the spindly, anemic-looking trees desperately trying to stretch out at their base taking on a similar repetition. The princess looked up towards the leafy canopy high above her head. It was so dark, she half expected to see stars, but alas, no natural light came. Azura shuddered as she picked up her pace, matching steps with her elder brother.

 

“It's so dark and dismal here. Are you certain we couldn't go _around_ the forest, Ryouma?” The high prince looked up from the map he was consulting- perhaps trying to gauge where they would come out- and shook his head.

“I'm afraid not, Azura. They say this is one of the darkest regions in Nohr, and that's precisely why we're here. Even Nohrians would have a hard time tracking us through this area.” Even though she wasn't a part of the conversation, Nerr could not help the laughing scoff that escaped her lips at those words. It seemed Silas, who was walking his destrier nearby (though Plavo had been healed from his arrow injury, the horse still limped slightly), shared her amusement, looking over his shoulder at the older man.

 

“It's adorable that you think that, Prince Ryouma. Nohrians could track us here just fine if they wanted to. The thing is, they _don't_.” From behind his older siblings, Takumi shuddered slightly, unable to keep his voice from wavering.

“Wh-why the hell not?”

“It's haunted, obviously.” Nerr answered him simply, remembering her history lessons. “This is where they throw the corpses of plague victims. Their remains are probably still in the bogs.” Sakura, who had been skirting the edge of one of said bogs, shrieked and dashed forward, clinging to Hinoka's arm. Ryouma alone did not seem perturbed by this news, though his face did look a touch paler than usual.

 

“The same can be said of nearly every location on the planet; this isn't the only impromptu graveyard. Regardless, the souls of the long dead have no grief with us. We're not here to bother them; as soon as we make it through the forest, we'll be just outside Windmire.” That seemed... much too simple. To think, if they hadn't made any detours, if they hadn't stopped in Macarath or gone to Freesia, they could've been in the capital weeks ago. For the third time, Nerr noticed the same gash in the trunk of one of the trees. That wouldn't have bothered her so much on it's own, but coupled with the ever increasing whimpers and fearful murmurs echoing behind her, Nerr was beginning to feel her skin crawl. She picked up her pace until she fell in step beside Felicia.

 

“Felicia. Are you _sure_ we're on the right track? I'd hate for these nyctophobic Hoshidans to get lost in here...” The peach-haired girl nodded vigorously, though her smile seemed stretched painfully tight at the corners.

“Uh huh! Don't worry, Lady Nerr. I know my way around this place pretty well. Flora and I used to camp out here in the summer.” Her smile was quickly devolving into a grimace. “Between the two of us, we-- we had every nook and cranny... mapped out... Oh, Flora...!” She stopped walking, unable to move forward as she wailed miserably, fat tears rolling down her cheeks and dripping onto her blouse. Nerr wanted to reach out, to hug her like she normally would've done, but at the same time, she wanted to rip off her ears so she didn't have to listen to the sobbing drilling into her skull. She even stretched out her hand, coming just close enough to rest it on the other girl's shoulder, before drawing it back, unable to make contact.

 

“I-- I'm so sorry, Felicia. I didn't mean to--” She couldn't even finish her train of though; it was taking all her willpower to not start clawing at her flesh to stop the miserable, crawling sensation running up her spine and under her skin. Fortunately, Silas was there to save the day as he always seemed to be. Ever there for a friend in need, the silver haired cavalier approached the weeping maid, letting her cry on his shoulders instead. Inwardly, Nerr breathed a sigh of relief that at least _she_ hadn't had to be the one to offer a shoulder. Her voice muffled by the dark steel she leaned against, Felicia managed to gasp out a few words between her sobs.

“I-- I'm sorry... I need a m-moment...”

“It's fine. Take all the time you need.” Kind words were all the comfort she could manage now, but it seemed to be enough. After a few more minutes of crying, by which time, the others had caught up to them, the maid managed to stand upright, wiping her eyes and nose on her sleeve.

 

“Th-thank you, Lady Nerr. I know we're all... suffering in one way or another... I'm just trying to... hold it together.” The princess nodded grimly, unable to meet her eyes.

“And you're doing a very good job of it. It's fine, Felicia. Believe me; I know all too well how much it hurts to not be given the time to properly mourn a loved one...” She also knew how much it hurt when no one else seemed to care, which was one pain Felicia would at least not have to endure. “We're all here for you. I promise.”

 

The maid managed to give her a watery smile before collecting herself as best as she was able and continuing forward. They marched in relative silence for what must have been hours; surely it was hours, hours of trudging past the same landmarks time and time again. She was not going crazy. This was worse than the Eternal Stairway; there was no exit to these woods. Groaning under her breath, Nerr leaned against the trunk of one of the trees, digging her fingers into the gash in it's thick bark. She wasn't some delicate flower who could not walk a few miles, but she was getting exhausted. The air itself seemed to be growing more oppressive. Once again, she looked up to the darkness above her head. If there had just been some kind of natural light, some way to measure the flow of time. It was not surprising that Ryouma had been the one to notice her lagging behind. He always seemed to be the first one to notice that, and always the first one to call her out on it.

 

“Don't wander away on your own again, Nerrida. You'll get lost in here.” She scoffed weakly.

“Not likely. You'll just pass me on your tenth loop around...”

“What are you talking about, sister?”

“I know Felicia said she knows her way around here, but it feels like we've been walking in circles for _hours_ now.” The high prince frowned deeply, crossing his arms over his chest and looking around.

 

“Hmm? I don't think so... It probably just feels that way because it's so dark.” Given the way he was squinting, it seemed likely he couldn't see more than a few feet in front of him. Nerr frowned; no wonder she was the only one complaining...

“Not likely. It's not _that_ dark. I know you can't see it, but we've passed this tree at _least_ three times so far. This can't be possible, it has to be some kind of... illusion, or something.” She was pulled from her frustrated thoughts by the sight of something glowing in the distance. Through the gloom of the woods, it looked... pretty. Comforting, a pale blue light. The princess pushed herself away from her resting place, taking a small step in the direction of the light. “Okay, that's something different...”

 

“What? What is it?” Ryouma seemed to pick up on it too. The others had stopped and were slowly coming back towards them.

“Is that some sort of plant, or animal?” Azura asked timidly. Given the bioluminesence of the woods, that didn't seem unlikely, but... the way the lights flickered and faded did not seem natural. Nerr could not suppress the shudder that ran down her spine.

“No. That's an unnatural light, like the torches we used in the citadel.” Enchanted flames that did not go out unless their caster ended the spell... or their target burned away completely... The eldest Hoshidan royal reached for the grip of his katana, eyes narrowing.

 

“I don't like the looks of this... You said you think there's an illusion at work here, Nerrida; do you think this is Iago's doing?” The flickering lights seemed to be coming closer, too large to be the wil-o-the-wisps that emitted from the swamps. Nerr shook her head, unable to tear her eyes away from the flames long enough to reach for her own blade.

“...doubt it- they're not exploding. But regardless, we probably don't want to be here long enough to find out... We should leave.”

“It's too late for that- we're surrounded!” Takumi was already aiming his Fuujin at one of the fireballs that was bobbing ever closer- though what he hoped to do to what must've been a spell was unknown to anyone but the second prince. Hinoka had also drawn her weapon, moving to stand between whatever magic was at work and Sakura and Azura.

 

“Let's just hope these... _things_... aren't hostile.” Nerr was less concerned with the intentions of the lights than with what they revealed. With the extra illumination, she could see further ahead, towards a large mound surrounded by a deep swamp. Stones, their inscriptions covered by witch's hazel or weathered away, jutted out from the earth. She had barely begun to wonder just how many people were buried in _that_ grave when the murky waters began bubbling, like a potion brewing over a fire. With a large splash, something massive erupted from the bog, soaking the ground, as well as the princess, in fetid water. She gagged, trying to spit out the foul mud that had made it's way into her mouth. A muffled growl that was still loud enough to echo through the forest rang out as the hulking, decomposing body of a Faceless clambered out onto dry land. More loud splashes could be heard around them, the explosions of water mingling with the roaring. Sakura screamed in terror, clinging to her elder sister.

 

“Faceless! They're everywhere! Nee-sama was right; this place _is_ haunted!!” By that time, Nerr had been able to shake herself from her stupor long enough to unsheathe the Yato, and she adjusted her chilled fingers on it's grip, waiting for one of the vile beasts to come close enough that she could cut it down. She did not want to charge them only to fall into the swamp; who knew how deep it was, or how many rotting hands were waiting to drag any unsuspecting victims below the surface. The monstrosities did not charge, however. They remained where they were, still roaring, water and viscous blood dripping from their oversized limbs, but utterly still. Ryouma straightened, frowner even deeper.

 

“...there's something wrong with these Faceless. It's almost like they're... waiting.”

“That's impossible!” Azura gasped. “They always attack everything on sight without hesitation; that's what they're created to do!”

“Yes, which means someone must be controlling them.”

“Well, hell; then _that's_ the threat we need to deal with, but where could their summoner be? How close by does someone have to be to control Faceless?” Nerr's question was answered by a hollow, echoing laugh that made the hairs on the back of her neck strand on end.

 

“Oh, Nerr... Have you really lost your night eyes so quickly? Hoshido has made you soft...” She recognized that drawling, arrogant voice anywhere, though it had never chilled her blood before. Usually because it was coming from in front of her, rather than all around her. The princess whipped around, trying to find the source of the voice.

“Leo!? Where are you!? Don't you hide from me, little girl!” The younger Nohrian prince scoffed, a chorus of Leos scoffing with him amidst the trees.

“That's quite an attitude to take with a voice in the dark, is it not? Can you still not see me... even when I'm right in front of you?” The sound of iron shod hooves on stone was what drew her attention back up to the mound. Leo, with his black armor and black destrier clad in black barding, stepped out of the shadows as through they had been an extension of himself. Though really, with his fair skin and flaxen hair, she _must_ have been blind to not have noticed him before. A deep, indigo miasma seemed to roll over the grave like fog, falling down the slope and continuing it's way over the bog, towards the soldiers. The Hoshidans cried out in fear, eager to escape it, but Nerr remained where she was. Aside from it being cold and smelling terribly, it wasn't causing any harm. No, what _was_ causing harm was the magic her brother was channeling. She could feel it where she stood, thrumming inside her, like a Dragon Vein, only much more concentrated. The gravestones shuddered as the earth around them quaked.

 

“Nohrian law is _blunt_ on the subject of traitors. There is only one punishment.” He closed his eyes and pulled out his Brynhildr tome, it's ancient pages glowing as he channeled his magic through them. She could see the tombstones glowing as well, resonating with the frequency as they were lifted into the air, vibrating intensely. Opening his earthen eyes once more, Leo clenched his fist and at once, all the ancient stone shattered, crumbling into dust that fell to back to the burial grounds. The loathing was as plain on his face as it was in his voice. “The sentence is _death._ ” Snapping at the reins, he spurred his steed forward, the destrier's powerful legs carrying it over the shattered remnants of the tombstones and swamp, landing almost gracefully in front of Nerr. It was strange to have to crane her neck up to look at her, up till now, _little_ brother. The way he sneered at her was also unnerving. It almost reminded her of Takumi.

 

“Yes, sister. I'm here to settle the score once and for all. No more running or hiding; it's time to pay for your betrayal!”

“I never betrayed you, Leo! It was Garon who--”

“Yes, yes, I've heard this song before.” It seemed he was as tired of listening to her plea as she was of lamenting it. “Nothing is ever your fault; it's always because of someone else. If it's not Father, it's the Hoshidans, and if it's not them, I don't _care_ who it is. You must think you're speaking to someone far stupider if you honestly believe those pathetic excuses will work on me. The Nerr I knew at least took responsibility for her mistakes...” For a moment, a look of misery crossed Leo's youthful face, before it was replaced once more with loathing. “Look; I've even gone to the trouble of trapping you in a proper graveyard! After all, the sister I once loved is _dead_ , murdered by your filthy, byak hands. It's only fitting.” Her younger brother had never been one to mince words, and as much as she hated his brusque nature sometimes, it was also one of the things she'd always admired about him. But now, to hear him spit such cold, cruel words at her... Nerr almost longed for his usual insults of her intellect. Behind her, the Hoshidans seemed to realize finally the fog dusting around their calves would not hurt them, and they drew closer, Takumi closer than most.

 

“That's some big talk for a reedy little bookworm! You're a coward, just like your father, King Garon! Why don't you come down here and fight us face to face?” Leo's lips curled into a disgusted sneer as he took in the sight of the Hoshidan prince.

 

“You're quite confident for a dastard who shoots his foes with arrows from afar. This has nothing to do with you, Hoshidan. Be silent!” Channeling his magic once more, the Nohrian prince wrapped Takumi in a dark aura, lifting him off his feet. He barely had time for fear to come over him before he was tossed away like a ragdoll, landing with a mighty splash in one of the nearby swamps. The other Hoshidans were beside themselves as they tried to pull him out. Leo raised his voice, calling out to all of them.

“If you think you can best me, so be it. Let's see how long you can survive here. You Hoshidans think you're a ray of light in the world, but you're all hypocritical bastards. _True_ power comes from a heart forged in darkness!” A loud scream finally drew Nerr's attention from her brother to the crowd behind her. Takumi had been pulled from the swamp, but was writhing on the ground, twisting and pulling at his clothes as though they were on fire.

 

“Auuughh!! It burns!!”

“What the hell is wrong with you _now!?_ ” She could not keep the anger from her voice; it was always _something_ with that boy. Unfortunately, it seemed it wasn't alone in his anguish. Sakura was desperately wiping her hands on her skirt.

“Ow! Eyaahh!!” Hinoka, who's entire front was wet, seemed to be having trouble breathing.

“Oh gods... I feel like I've... been hit with a hexing rod...” Ryouma gasped, quickly pulling his siblings away from the saturated ground.

“It's the swamp! Everyone, stay away from the water! It must have some kind of poison in it!”

 

“What the hell is your problem?! It's just a little dirty!” Nerr screamed at them. They were acting like a little mud was going to kill them. She'd been showered in the foul bog water, had spent the previous night soaking her feet in it. There was nothing wrong with the water. Once again, their delicate constitutions were making problems where there shouldn't have been any. “Get _back here,_ you whiny babies!”

“Hmm...” Behind her, Leo sounded thoughtful, and when she turned back to face him, his eyes were discerning rather than angry. “So your connection to Nohr _hasn't_ been completely severed, I see... No matter. I'll just have to be the one to sever it myself.”

“Leo, please, stop talking like that. Just listen to me for a moment--”

“Do you think I want to hear your words, your _lies_ , traitor? I don't want, nor do I need, anything from you but your _death_.” Nerr recoiled from him, as though his words had struck her physically. That was the kind of thing she expected from Garon, even from Takumi and Ryouma... never, _never_ from Leo. The young prince continued, speaking more to himself than her, as though he had forgotten he even had an audience present.

 

“All sources of light shall be swallowed up in my darkness because _I will it so_. Hoshidans, who have spent their days in the light, can't survive without it, such delicate flowers... I'm surprised you aren't wilting right alongside them. You even saw through my illusion, though it took you a good hour to do so...” Sniffling slightly, the princess frowned up at her brother.

“I always _was_ , and always _shall be,_ a Nohrian, brother. I thrive in the darkness.”

“...that only goes to show that you were meant to side with _us_. You chose wrong, Nerr. You chose the light, and left those who love you most to rot in the dark, you traitorous _bitch!!”_ Though his voice had been soft, almost mournful at first, with every word Leo's vitriol grew more and more caustic. Nerr flinched as he spat at her, _bitch-_ Leo never swore, not to her, not to his siblings...

“You _know_ I didn't abandon you, Leo! You know I never wanted to leave you! I wanted nothing more than to come home, but at every turn, Garon is trying to kill me! He even drew Flora into his plots--”

 

“You don't even hear how crazy you sound, do you? To have you tell it, the whole world is out to kill you. As if you're so special... Of course, it's hardly surprising you'd be so self-centered, given the way you were raised. Xander always lavished you with praise, while ignoring my accomplishments... Camilla was the same. She-- she _always_ loved you more than me! And don't even get me started on Elise- as far as she's concerned, you hung the stars in the sky!!” It was so unlike Leo to get worked up over anything. The way he spoke, the way he seemed unable to control the volume of his voice, it seemed that he had been holding in his complaints for too long and was now at his breaking point. Even his magic seemed unchecked, crackling around him, buffeting his cape and hair.

“You were always Xander's perfect little toy solider and Camilla's favorite dress-up doll! I've _always_ hated you for that, Nerr. _Always._ I never said anything, because I was supposed to 'love' you too, but if I had known you'd betray us at the first chance you got, I wouldn't have bothered being intimidated by you! When I kill you, then they'll **HAVE** to love me!!” The only thing more unnerving than his words was the tone in which he spoke them, the crazed, desperate misery in his voice. It made Nerr sick to her stomach to think that, while she'd been basking the the warmth of her sibling's affection, her little brother had been growing more and more resentful of her. It made her wonder if his dare for her to jump off the landing had been as childishly innocent as it had seemed at the time... No, no that was crazy. Despite what he was saying, there was no way that Leo meant any of it.

 

“No... you don't mean that. I don't believe you...!” But, she hadn't believed that someone she had known for years would be capable of turning on her like a vicious dog. And even though Flora was only acting out of fear of Garon's retaliation, the fact remained that rather than _try_ and accept her help, she had simply opted to try killing Nerr instead. She could still see the scabbed eyes staring blankly ahead from within the charred skull of her supposed “friend”... Shuddering, she clawed at her scalp, the short, uneven hair scraping at her fingers only making her sicker. “You _can't_ mean that, Leo! I thought... I thought we were so close... Did you _never_ truly love me? I loved _you!_ I _still_ love you, so much!” The disgusted look he gave her, even inching away as though she were some fat, wriggling maggot that might leave a slimy trail on his boots, was answer enough.

 

“Ugh, that little girl pout you do when things don't go your way always made me sick. I hate _that_ most of all... You don't deserve a clean death; I'll let my Faceless rip you apart like the byak dog you are.”

“Leo, no!!” It wasn't that she was afraid of Faceless; hulking ogres sculpted of dead flesh seemed to make sense in her nightmarish world. No, she was afraid that if he turned away, he would be gone for good, she'd never have a chance to speak to him again, not even to try and plea her case with him, but just to beg his forgiveness for unwittingly making his life so miserable. Gripping his reins, he turned his steed away, heading further into the woods. Nerr had just been about to chase after him when a massive fist came swinging at her. She ducked the mottled, green flesh, but not the heavy, rusted chain that swept after it. The thick iron links hit her across the shoulders, knocking her back into the foul muck at their feet.

 

Even though her vision swam with pain as the vice gripping her head tightened, she managed to climb back to her feet, gripping her Yato tightly and bringing the blade down on the monster's thigh. It cut through the decaying flesh with ease, shattering the thick but brittle bone of it's femur and dropping the creature. It barely seemed to notice it was crippled, lashing out at her again, but this time, it's clubbed fingers met her sword, which sliced through them as well, dropping the severed phalanges onto the ground as well. Thrusting the Yato into the beast's skull finally stilled it, giving Nerr enough time to look back to see how the others were faring. The answer was... not well. The Hoshidans were giving the swamps a wide berth, and it was certain that Leo had been expecting that, because the Faceless he commanded stayed in it's depths, the chains that once bound them striking the soldiers just as easily as they had struck her, swatting them away like flies.

 

Takumi, recovered from his stint in the supposedly tainted water, summoned an arrow with his holy bow and let it loose, where it met with the nearest Faceless's skull. The weakened skin and cracked bone exploded as the arrow detonated within it, resulting in a shower of thick, congealed blood and macerated flesh. The stench was even worse. Silas did not balk at the prospect of getting muddy, and charged forward, his sabatons sinking deep into the muck as he thrust his sword into the belly of another monster, wrenching the blade upwards until it was stopped by the beast's ribcage. Putrid bowels spilled out, further contaminating the water. But even as the Faceless fell, missing their heads and limbs, even more rose from the churning foam. Hinoka seemed to notice that as well as she dragged her Amaterasu through the ribs of another monster.

 

“These things aren't stopping! They're going to overtake us soon!” Takumi let loose another arrow, shielding his eyes from the shrapnel of bone and meat that resulted.

“Then what we _need_ to do is find the little chickenshit who's controlling them and overtake _him!_ ” There was no doubt in Nerr's mind what any of the Hoshidans, not just Takumi, would try to do to Leo if given the chance. Scarlet had probably brainwashed them into hating the royals even more. They didn't care that Garon was the mastermind behind all the suffering wrought unto their country; Nohrian scum was Nohrian scum. Ducking between the legs of one of the lumbering monsters, she thrust her sword into it's spine, tearing through the flesh and ensuring she severed everything that kept it mobile. The Faceless collapsed in a heap of rotting limbs, though it continued roaring and growling.

 

Only absolute death would stop them, which she granted it by shattering it's skull, paying no mind to the metal rods that skittered near her feet. She needed to make sure the same did not hold true for her little brother. Turning on her heel, the Nohrian princess ran in the direction Leo had retreated to, deeper into the impenetrable black of the woods. She could hear Azura calling out to her to come back, but she had no intention of returning to the Hoshidans now. His bitter, angry words came back to her, ringing loud and mocking in her mind, _You chose the light and left those who love you most to rot in the dark..._ Tears stung her eyes, making it even harder to see in the darkness. So it came as little surprise that she was caught completely off guard by the silvery arrow whizzing through the gloom until it lodged itself in her thigh, sending her face planting to the dusty ground. Moaning in pain, she tried to right herself, only to be thwarted by the pain radiating up her leg. A seductive voice called out from the shadows.

 

“So. _You're_ the little thorn in my master's side, are you? I was expecting bigger tits...”

“Niles! Control yourself! Such vile language has no place in this, the darkest and most hallowed of encounters!”

“Honey, if I was using my 'vile' language, you'd be hard as a rock right now...”

“ _Eeeewww!_ ” Nerr could not tell if she was disturbed or amused by the back and forth between the two men who had appeared from the shadows. One, a tawny archer with fluffy white hair, was smirking in an almost predatory way at his companion, a young blonde man donning the robes of a sorcerer in the most hideously garish shade of yellow she'd ever seen. Colors like that had no place in Nohr. Bitting her lip, she tried to put pressure on her wound- much as she would've like to simply rip the arrow out, that would do more harm than good.

 

“Who-- who the hell are you freaks?” The darker man turned towards her, the eye not covered with a dark leather patch gleaming with lecherous delight.

“Me? I'm so damn turned on right now. The sight of you lying there, your face contorted in pain, that _long, hard_ _shaft_ inside you... It's a miracle I haven't come already.” Even though Nerr _knew_ every word coming from his debauched mouth was sexual, the incongruousness of the situation left her too baffled to be offended. The blonde man was offended enough for the both of them, punching the archer rather hard in the arm.

 

“What did I fucking tell you about talking like that, Niles!? It's gross! Stop it!!” Glancing down at the princess, the sorcerer seemed to realize how ruffled he looked, and quickly composed himself... into a ridiculous pose. “Ignore my depraved companion, princess. The heat of battle causes him to take leave of his senses. _I_ am Odin Dark- warrior chosen by the blessed darkness! It has been too long, hasn't it, young Nerr? My sacred blood boils in lament that our next meeting should be under such unpleasant terms. Alas, if only you had stayed true to our glorious and noble kingdom... You've no idea how much it pains my soul to stand opposite you on the battlefield...”

 

“ _You're not making any sense. Could you try to make some sense, please, or at least get the fuck out of my way?”_ While “Odin Dark” had been waxing poetic, Nerr had reached into her bag and pulled out her dragonstone; she had enough practice walking on three feet in that form. Now, the sorcerer stared up at her, mouth agape. The other man, Niles, stared up at her as well, and though he was still grinning, it seemed his swarthy face had paled a bit.

“...okay, maybe I _don't_ want to go sticking my dick in little girls if they're gonna start turning into dragons...”

“Sacred Stones, you really _are_ a manakete! Oh _gods,_ this is just the worst! I thought that was an exaggeration!!” For a moment, she thought Odin was _afraid_ of her, but as she looked down, she realized that, though he looked on the verge of tears, it seemed born for actual misery than fear. What his problem was, she did not know (she was beginning to assume he was a few pages short of a tome), nor did she particularly care at the moment.

 

“ _I don't want to hurt either of you. Just tell me where the hell my brother is; I need to talk to him!”_ Niles seemed to recover first, grabbing and notching another arrow, aiming it right between her eyes.

“Sorry, sweet cheeks, but I'm afraid Lord Leo isn't in the mood for any pillow talk.” Before he could let his arrow fly, Nerr batted him away into the nearest swamp, certain she felt something snap as the archer's body curved.

“ _I don't think I was asking for anyone's opinion. I just want to talk to my damn brother!!”_

“Can you go one day without throwing a tantrum?” The dragon's long neck swiveled to see Leo emerge from the forest. The trees themselves seemed to bow out of the way for the prince, though she was certain he was using his magic to manipulate them. Breathing sharply through her nostrils, her tail twitched in irritation.

 

“ _That sounds more like YOU, Leo. You won't let me get two words in edgewise without going on a rant.”_

“Because I don't want to hear anything your filthy, byak lips have to say!” The younger boy hissed. “I'm sick of hearing your excuses and lies in my sister's voice! If the only way I can make it stop is by killing you with my own hands, then so be it.” He cast his spell so quickly, she only noticed it as the razor sharp saplings tore the thickened hide of her knuckles, scrapping against her scales. Nerr managed to just barely avoid their branches impaling her unprotected underside by leaping over them, bringing her curved horns down on Leo's armor. The pointed hooks left deep punctures in his cuirass, and though his steed was panicking, the prince did not loose control. He cast another spell, this one not summoning more deadly arbor, but rather, to manipulate the gravity around her. She felt her feet lift the ground just seconds before she was flung into the trunk of a nearby tree, with just as much ease as she had flung Niles earlier.

 

But true to form, Leo would not be who he was if he didn't outshine everyone around him. Even as the bruises formed beneath her cracked scales, the prince changed direction, hurling her into another, unshattered gravestone. He may well have smashed her against every solid surface available to him had she not rapidly shrank down back to her original size while he was trying to send her flying up towards the canopy. His concentration was broken just long enough for her to hit the ground, hard, but it was enough time for her. Grabbing her sword and ignoring the pain shooting up her leg, Nerr charged at him, ducking his next spell the moment she felt the ground shudder beneath her feet. Had she been wearing shoes, she probably wouldn't have noticed the imperceptible tremors.

 

Leaping up on her good leg, she managed to smash the Yato against his chest like a club, knocking him back, out of his saddle. His tome hit the ground, and she kicked it away, aware that treating a holy weapon in such a way was probably sacrilegious, but too preoccupied with not dying to care. Even without his tome, Leo attempted to fight her, reaching for the sword at his hip, but as talented a mage as her brother was, he could not compare to her in terms of swordplay. She knocked the blade from his hand easily, leveling her own at his throat. She could just make out the bead of sweat running along his jugular, soaking into the high collared shirt he wore beneath his armor and staining it even darker.

 

“Yield, Leo.” The younger boy looked up from her blade to her face, disgust marring his features before he looked away contemptuously.

“Go ahead. Do what you must.” ...did he honestly expect her to kill him? Tightening her grip on the Yato, Nerr drove it deep into the soil, scowling at Leo as she breathed hard. Her head was throbbing and her leg was aflame.

“ _No_. Be a man and accept your defeat. If you hadn't been so damn stubborn and had just listened to me from the start, none of this would've happened. We could've _ended_ this--” This time, it was Leo who showed his anger. He reached out, shoving the older woman in his anger, knocking her to the ground.

 

“No! Don't you see?! This can't ever end! Not until one of us is dead!” When Takumi had shoved her, as they fled Nestra, she had been hurt. Now, despite the physical pain she was in, she felt nothing but frustration. Frustration at her stupid brothers (all of them), at the miserable hand she'd been dealt in life, at her own cowardice... Wincing, she managed to stumble back to her feet, shoving the prince right back (and quite a bit harder).

“I refuse to accept that! You're buying into Father's lies, Leo! Just like Xander. He's pitting you against me so that I'll fight you and you'll have reason to think I've sided with the Hoshidans, but that's not going to happen! There was no need for us to even instigate war with the Hoshidans like this in the first place!” The Nohrian prince stared at her as though she were speaking a foreign language before shaking his head in exasperation.

 

“...you've always been naïve, Nerr... That or _stupid;_ I can't tell, sometimes. Our kingdoms have been at war for generations before Father was even born- was it his doing then? When Hoshidans send spies into our villages to sow seeds of discontent, like they did in Chevalier, when they refuse to trade with us while we are on the brink of collapse, who's fault is it _then!?_ ” His lithe frame shook with rage, hands balled into tight fists as he glared at the ground at his feet, perhaps cursing it for not having the power to end her as he had tried to do. “This is _war_ , Nerr! This is life or death- there is no time for doubt! Faltering makes you weak, and only the strong survive here- you _know_ that! If Nohr bows down, we'll lose everything. One more famine, one more freak storm, one more plague and we'll be _ruined!_ If the Hoshidans truly cared only about protecting their earthly paradise, they wouldn't be _here_ , destroying what little we have! Our land and our people... our culture and our legacy... our families... even our lives... Even if they don't destroy it personally, they'll sit back and watch it burn...” The younger prince's voice broke, and as his shoulders shook, it was clear that he was not trying to suppress his _anger_ anymore.

 

“They already took _you;_ I won't let Hoshido take anything more from us! I won't back down!”

“...then kill me, Leo.” Sniffling, Leo finally looked up, his eyes rimmed with red, cheeks damp where tears had been coursing down them.

“What?”

“You heard me.” Biting back a grimace of pain, Nerr lowered herself to the ground so that she was kneeling before her brother. She reached out, grabbing the steel blade of the sword she had knocked from his grip and handing it to him. “If you think I've turned my back on you in favor of the Hoshidans... and you think killing them will solve all your problems... then start with me.” Leo grabbed the hilt of his sword, pulling it away from her only to rest the finely honed edged against her neck.

 

“...I could kill you easily. I may not have Xander's skill with a blade, but any village idiot can be a butcher.”

“Then, by all means. If you hate me so much, if I've truly caused you so much heartache, then put me out of your misery and my own.” Even through her damp clothes, the blade was still cold. It tapped against her neck, an uneven patter.

“...you could've killed me. I don't doubt your ability to hurt me, dear sister; you've twisted more than enough knives into my heart for me to be sure of that. You could've made the Hoshidans so proud of you... But instead, you throw yourself on _my_ mercy... Why? What's _wrong_ with you!?” His voice was thick with tears, and every time she blinked, Nerr could feel her own drip onto her fists, clenched tightly in the dirt. She sniffled loudly, aware of how much of a mess she must seem. It would've been disgraceful, facing one's execution in such a state.

 

“...so much, brother. So very much is wrong with me, but I know that nothing is wrong with you. We grew up together, Leo. I know, beneath that cold, hard exterior beats a warm, soft, kind heart.”

“Shut up...”

“No, Leo, I--”

“I told you to _shut up!!_ ” His voice cracked as he threw down his sword, the way it often did a few years ago. His face was flushed, like it always was when he got mad. “What makes you think you understand _anything_ about me, you Hoshidan savage?!”

“...because we're family, Leo. Because, regardless of the blood within me, you will _always_ be my precious, beloved baby brother.” And, all at once, his anger broke, like a dam that had been holding back the misery he tried so hard to contain. The young prince turned away from her, but he was sobbing so loudly the only thing that did was spare him the shame of seeing her reaction.

 

Sighing deeply, Nerr got back to her feet (she was getting tired of constantly having to stand up) and reached out for her brother. A small part of her, the part that had gotten used to Takumi, expected him to push her away, to lash out at her... but Leo had never been like that. Despite his arrogance and insults, he _never_ spurned her love. Wailing even louder, the younger boy threw himself into her arms, weeping bitterly into her shoulder. Even through his armor, she could feel how slender he was. It sickened her, to think of her little brother in such pain, be it physical or in his soul. Leo and Elise should've been out playing, and enjoying the last few years of their childhood, not engulfed in a miserable war where no side could truly be the winner. But even as she cursed Garon's name for doing this to his children, she knew that she was not blameless in it. If she had just come home, that would have spared them _some_ grief. Even if it meant being killed by the king, she would've at least cemented in their hearts that she truly loved them, and that nothing would change that. Now... Now, there would always be doubt.

 

“Nerrida!” Behind her, voices called out into the darkness. “Nerrida, where are you? Answer us!” Leo sniffled, and tried to pull away.

“Your family is calling you.” Nerr viciously tugged him back, wincing as the top of his head collided with her teeth- she often forgot that he was taller than her.

“ _You're_ my family, Leo. And besides, I don't know who the hell this 'Nerrida' person they keep talking to is.” She recalled bitterly telling them that, but it seemed only Azura and, towards the end, Kaze, ever understood. Running feet hit the ground hard, some even splashing through the muck.

“Nerr! You're alright! Thank the gods!” Silas' voice was relieved, a far cry from Takumi's, who sounded torn between fear and disgust.

 

“She's not 'alright'! The Nohrian's _raping_ her! Put your head down, nee-san!” There was so much wrong with that sentence, from the very notion of her little brother- _ugh_ \- having his way with her, to the fact that Takumi had called her “nee-san”, something she only heard him use with Hinoka and, on the rarest occasions, Azura. Reluctantly, she pulled away from Leo just long enough to glare at the Hoshidan prince, who was currently aiming his Fuujin somewhere at the vicinity of her head- but... hadn't he told her to duck? It was too confusing to try and make sense of.

“You have a sick mind, Takumi. You see two siblings hugging and the first thing your thoughts turn to is _sex?_ ”

“Nohrians are known for their depravity. _Especially_ King Garon.” Ryouma stepped forward, the armor that covered his left arm ripped away, the flesh beneath mottled with bruises. “Given that you vanished into the enemy stronghold without a trace, one can be forgiven for assuming the worse, especially considering the last time you disappeared with a Nohrian royal...” The fact that he was comparing _all_ of the royals to Garon turned her stomach, and she did not try to hide her distaste.

 

“The battle is over. You're no longer needed here. You can leave now.”

“You're crazy if you think we're going to leave you alone with a Nohrian, Nerrida.” Just the _sound_ of Hinoka's voice made her want to break something.

“This _Nohrian_ is my _brother_.”

“The same brother that just tried to _kill_ you?” At this, Leo laughed bitterly. Though his cheeks were still sticky from tears, he seemed to be reverting back to his usual demeanor.

 

“Ha! As if Hoshidans have never ended a life to serve their own purpose. Did you think no one would notice all the soldiers you slaughtered? All the castle and border guards who were simply doing their duty? Is this how you defend your country- by invading ours and killing everything in your path?” The young prince turned towards his sister and she flinched, but surprisingly, his red-rimmed eyes were softer as he looked at her, as was his voice. “You mean nothing to them. They would slit your throat in an instant if they thought it served them, sister...” Nerr shut her eyes. She had thought that he was going to denounce her for her part in all that slaughter. Somehow, still anticipating it was even worse.

 

“I don't doubt that for a moment, brother. But the problem is, so would the man I once called 'Father'. And he's already attempted it on multiple occasions.” She opened her eyes, staring her brother down. “How could you have expected me to go crawling back to him, knowing he'd kill me in an instant? You know damn well he would, and you wouldn't have any power to stop him, yet you _still_ condemn me for not returning with you...”

“...because I'm selfish.” Leo whispered back to her, so that the Hoshidans behind them couldn't hear. “Because it's easier to pretend that _you're_ crazy than it is to admit there are problems beyond our scope that we can't deal with without risking death ourselves. I... I'm sorry, sister...” He looked so tired, so broken, so much older than his scant sixteen years. Not caring what her birth family thought, Nerr pulled him back into a hug, relaxing slightly as she felt his gauntlets reach up and curl into the fabric of her sweater.

 

“It's okay, Leo...”

“I never hated you. Not... not ever. I mean, I _was_ jealous of you at times; it was impossible not to be. You were _always_ Xander's favorite, though I think that has less to do with familial love than he would have you know...”

“Huh?” The younger boy quickly changed the subject.

“And Camilla always doted on you so... And don't get me started on Elise... But then... I took for granted that I had them all to myself. I hated them- _and you_ \- for lavishing you with attention when they went to visit you, but it was so easy to forget that for the few hours a month you had them, I had them the rest of the time. Gods, I must seem like the pettiest fool...”

 

“No. Not at all, Leo. I'm just sorry you were so unhappy because of me...” A thought formed in her head, only half a thought, more of an inkling than anything. She drew back, just enough that she could look her brother in the eye once again. “But Leo, please... join me, brother! Camilla already understands, and with your help, I know we could convince Xander that this war is being fought the wrong way.” Leo pulled away from her completely, aghast.

“And what's the _right_ way, sister? By deposing the king? You know Father won't step down until he's _dead._ The same with Xander- he's no fool, he just puts his loyalty to king and country above all else, just as we all do, just as you used to...” She felt like her heart had been struck with a mace. Used to... she used to do a lot of things. “...you're asking me to betray my father, my family, my country... how can I do that? I can't hurt my siblings! Not after what you put them through... I won't do it!” Nerr sighed. She knew that had been a long shot, but she had still held onto the hope that _maybe_ , he wouldn't see it as betrayal. Though, if someone had posed that same question to her six months ago, she'd have responded in the same way.

 

“I understand, Leo. I'll admit, I have regretted my decision nearly every day. It's lonely, and miserable, and only grows lonelier and more miserable with each passing day. More often than not on these days, I think it would've been better to die by fa--- Garon's hand than live like this, but... I'm a coward.” There it was; that was all there was to it. She did not have the courage to face death the way Flora did. Takumi's voice broke through her thoughts, loud and annoying as it always was.

“Stop trying to reason with him; he's a loyal Nohrian drone. You're just wasting your breath. We need to get the hell out of here.” Leo glared at the other prince.

“Ugh. Hard to believe you're related to something like that.”

“Don't I know it...” Azura slowly approached, the clearly seeing that Nerr had no intention of leaving of her own volition and being the only one who seemed willing to risk the dark mage's attack.

 

“Nerr, we need to leave now. It's likely Iago already knows we're here and the last thing we need is to get cornered by _his_ troops.” Leo looked her up and down, frowning slightly.

“...you're Azura, yes? You look similar to how I've heard Queen Arete described. Sorry if I don't recognize you on your own merits- everyone from back then kind of blurs together in my mind. I've repressed a lot of memories.” Though his voice was flip, it was clear by the darkness in his eyes that the memory of the time of chaos and death (affectionately called “The Concubine Wars” by Camilla) still weighed on his soul. “Does that mean... are we related?” Azura took a step back, gathering her long skirts in her hands, clearly uncomfortable with the turn the conversation had taken.

 

“Yes, I am Azura, but... I'm afraid we're not related.” Nerr's eyes widened at that revelation.

“But I thought--” Hadn't she said that she was a princess of Nohr? Granted, none of the Nohrian siblings shared a common mother, but Garon was their father. The songstress shot her a look at clearly said to drop it. Leo nodded, as though this came as no news to him.

“Does that mean you're not actually from Nohr? Because when I saw you, the first thing that popped into my mind is, 'you don't look Nohrian'. Nerr looks more Nohrian than you. Then again,” His voice dropped back down to a mutter. “They say you take after the people who raise you...” Even though he was speaking to Azura, his words felt like barbs that tugged at her skin, and she quickly changed the subject.

 

“What are you going to do now, Leo? Are you going to report our position to Father? Or worse yet, Xander?” The younger prince walked away from her, though only far enough to pick up his fallen Brynhildr tome, brushing the dust from it's creased pages. He pointedly ignored the Hoshidans aiming their weapons at him.

“I don't know. I _should_ , and you know I should, too. My sister though you may be, I'm not entirely ready to forgive you for tearing apart our family just yet. To say nothing of you colluding with the enemy and bringing them to our doorstep...” His words were like a blow straight to her heart, and he seemed to realize how how painful they must've been, for when he looked back up at her, there was something apologetic in his gaze. “I know you have your reasons. And they're _good_ reasons- I can understand them, and I know Camilla and Elise do as well. But it's treason. And it hurts. And I don't think it will ever _stop_ hurting. To be honest, what _I'm_ going to do it the least of your concerns. None of you realize just how strong Xander is.” Nerr remembered seeing her eldest brother last in Cyrkensia, the loathing radiating from him. It was unlikely he cared about toppling the Hoshidans as much as he wanted to topple her and make her regret ever crossing him. So much like his father... the thought of that made her want to vomit.

 

“Leo, I've sparred with Xander hundreds of times. Trust me, I know he's... inhumanly strong, but I haven't turned tail yet, and I don't plan on doing so until I've had words with your father.” The younger boy laughed aloud, a sound mixed with mirth and mockery, as though she had just told a joke with herself as the punchline.

“You mean your friendly little tickling contests on the roof? You _do_ know he always went easy on you, right?” Leo's smiling expression slowly dimmed to concern. “You... _know_ that right?”

“ ' _Easy on me'_?! Tell that to all my broken bones and internal injuries! He broke my eye socket, once!” He scoffed, waving his hand as if that were nothing. Which, by his tone, it clearly wasn't.

 

“Those were little love taps. If Xander were actually _trying_ to hurt you, you'd be defecating in a bag. Also, you'd be _dead_. If nothing else I say clicks in that empty skull of yours, this better; Xander means business, Nerr. He is not to be taken lightly.” He turned his attention back to the Hoshidans, speaking loudly enough for them to hear. “You may not have been decimated by my small army of Faceless today, but judging by the sight of you, even if you all took Xander on at once... you'd be nothing but colorful smears on the ground by the time he was done with you.” The way the Hoshidans griped and grumbled, they clearly did not take kindly to their abilities being called into question. Nerr, however, knew better than to doubt her brother. He was the smartest of them all for a reason. If he said you could not win a fight, your only option was to run away. But still...

 

“I don't understand- that's not at all like Xander. He's... chivalrous, and honorable. He wouldn't--”

“You probably don't realize this, Nerr, what with your head being as empty as a seashell and all, but he took your... _decision_... harder than any of us. I don't know what our brother is thinking, but if I had to guess... If he can't have you, _no one_ can.” The Nohrian princess cringed slightly. Camilla had said something similar back in Chevalier. She knew that Nohrians were possessive, and honestly, found it an endearing trait, but this was beyond the pale. Had everyone lost their damned minds in the last six months? Well, given that she hadn't slept more than five hours in the past three days because she was hallucinating being eaten alive by ants, she was hardly in the position to criticize someone for being slightly unhinged... Azura seemed to realize that the other princess was too distraught- and exhausted- to form any more coherent thoughts, and turned to her... pseudo brother?

 

“What can we do, Leo?” The prince shrugged haplessly.

“Pray for a miracle. Or surrender- he might go easy on you then. Keyword there being _might_.” He sighed deeply, running a hand through his hair. The usual, neatly combed locks were ruffled and in disarray. He looked so unlike himself, disheveled and weary as he was. “Truly, there may be nothing you CAN do. But I do know one thing you can _try_. Make a pilgrimage to Notre Sagesse.”

“Notre What?”

“Sagesse.” Ryouma answered in Leo's stead, having approached until he was close enough to eavesdrop on their conversation. As much as Nerr wanted to berate him for sticking his nose in where it was not welcome, she knew it would do her no good. It wasn't as though her complaints ever did anything but fall on deaf ears. “From what I hear, it's a land of philosophers. What benefit could that possible have for us?”

 

“I don't know, nor do I give a damn, how things can benefit _you_ , Hoshidan. In case you didn't realize, I'm speaking to my sisters, _not_ you.” The Nohrian girl could not help but smile slightly; Leo's arrogance had always been amusing to observe when it wasn't being directed at her.

“Well, how can it benefit _me?_ I've no time or patience to ponder my own existence, which I suppose means I am not.” The younger prince smiled a bit as well at her weak attempt at a joke.

“Notre Sagesse is home to the Rainbow Sage. I don't know who he is or what he does, but Xander visited him ages ago. Upon returning, he put on a display of power the likes of which I've never seen.” That sounded... too good to be true.

 

“Why didn't _you_ visit him then? And the rest of Nohr's soldiers, if a source of unlimited power is just-- actually, I'm loathe to ask where exactly this Notre place is.” Clearly not realizing that his input was not wanted, Ryouma chimed in yet again.

“It's more than halfway back to Hoshido. The most direct route would take us back through Cyrkensia, and even then, we'd still have a lengthy boat ride ahead of us.”

“No! Hell. NO. I've spent six agonizing months dealing with you people, first trying to find your wayward sons, then trying to get to the capital. I'm not dealing with this a minute longer than I have to.”

 

“Then what will you do?” Leo asked, his voice back to it's usual, unaffected cadence. “I assure you that facing off against Xander as you stand is tantamount to suicide.” Nerr groaned. She was so tired, that actually sounded like a good idea, but... Leo wasn't telling her that so she could run headlong into certain death. If he wanted her to die, he wouldn't be giving her warnings and advice; he would've slit her throat when she gave him the chance.

“Fucking hell... _Fine_. I guess I'm going to Notre Sagesse. _Alone_.” Takumi scoffed loudly.

“Are you serious right now, Nerrida? Don't tell me you _believe_ this clown? Trying to send you off on some wild goose chase on your own; that's a trap waiting to be sprung if I've ever heard of one.” She rounded on her Hoshidan brother, her ire visible enough that he took a step away from her, even though she wouldn't be able to reach him in any hurry, given the arrow still lodged in her leg.

 

“Oh my gods, I will choke you, Takumi. This 'clown' is my brother, who I've known and trusted longer than _you_. If he says Xander will slaughter us all, then Xander will _slaughter us all!_ Also, given that him 'going easy' on me was usually enough to result in me needing physical therapy for several weeks, I'd say it's not that far of a stretch.” She turned away from him again- it was the only way to stop yelling at him. The very sight of the Hoshidan prince filled her with such an impotent rage that she could hardly think straight. “You all keep on ahead; fight the good fight, or whatever it is you think you're doing. The only way I can make Xander listen to me is to ensure he's on the brink of death so he can't stab me mid speech.” Takumi scoffed again, much quieter this time.

 

“Unbelievable...”

“I'm not asking anyone to come with me, thank you.” If he wanted to think she was going on a wild goose chase, then he could just leave her to it. That was exactly what Nerr had been expecting him to say, so it came as rather a surprise when her blood brother instead said,

“Who said anything about not going with you? You just clearly didn't think this through.” Somehow, that was even _worse_ than what she had been expecting him to say.

“I don't need you to babysit me! If you think my plans are stupid, then _don't follow me!_ ” Hinoka waved her hand in the air, brushing off the harsh words spat, mostly at Takumi, but meant for anyone listening.

 

“Of course we're coming with you, Nerr. If you think we're letting you go halfway back to Hoshido alone, either you're crazy or you think _we're_ crazy. Right, everyone?” Sakura nodded vigorously.

“O-of course! Wh-what if you g-got attacked on you own?”

“Then I'd deal with it on my own. Really, I can make this 'pilgrimage' on my own... and would, in fact, prefer to.” Ryouma shook his head, frowning slightly.

“Confidence in one's abilities is fine, but as you're always saying to me, you're going to to get yourself killed if you go through with this, especially on your own.” Azura's expression was less severe than her brother's as she laid a hand on Nerr's shoulder.

 

“Really, Nerr; did you have any doubt we wouldn't follow you?”

“Not 'doubt' so much as 'hope'. And I'm sure you'll follow me until Ryouma tells you to do otherwise.” The Nohrian princess sighed deeply, running a hand through her newly cropped hair. It felt so wrong... “Honestly, I feel like you all would just get in my way. Aren't pilgrimages supposed to be personal journeys? Just... let me do this alone. I could use the time to think...”

“And if Prince Xander catches wind of your trekking to holy lands for enlightenment, Nerrida?” She turned towards her older brother.

“...then I'd deal with him myself. Honestly, don't you have anything better to do than hover over my shoulder, Ryouma? You should be emperor right now, leading your people, not touring Nohr. No, I'm going on my own, and that's final.” Leo shook his head silently.

 

“Of course you are. I wouldn't recommend it, given that, loathe as I am to admit it, the Hoshidans are right, but I know you and common sense don't play nicely.” The Nohrian prince walked back over to his horse, the Hoshidan's eyes carefully watching his every movement, and he pulled something from the saddle bag. As he returned to Nerr, he handed her a large tome. Many of it's old, crumbling seemed to have fallen out, leaving only a few more. Gingerly, she took it and opened the worn cover, trying to make heads or tails of the runes contained within. Magic had never been her strong point...

“What the hell is this, Leo? Some kind of sandwich with words written on it?” With a loud, undignified snort, her brother doubled over with laughter. It seemed to be catching, for even Azura pressed her hands to her lips to (unsuccessfully) try and stifle her own laughter.

“Oh gods... Where's my sword; I have to kill you now for that joke...” He wheezed as his laughter died down. Nerr smiled a little- it was good to know that, despite all the fighting, all the death and pain, Leo still allowed his cold facade to crack in the face of silly jokes. He inhaled deeply, straightening, his expression evening. “It's a warp tome; it's how we teleport. I know your magic is pretty much nonexistent, but I'm sure someone in your little traveling party should have the power to use it. It's powerful enough to take you all the way to Notre Sagesse.” Her eyes widened slightly. She knew mages could teleport, but she always assumed that it was measured in meters, not miles.

 

“Is... is that actually possible?” The younger boy smirked, looking haughty.

“Of course it is. This is why I've always put my faith in books rather than blades. Nothing holds a candle to Nohrian magic. Now, I've been using this myself for years, so it's pretty worn out. I'd say it has enough power for _one_ round trip for about a dozen people. Probably less would be better. So don't push your luck unless you want to end up half in Dia, half in a wall somewhere in Anomovic.” Nerr closed the tome, holding it to her chest. She could feel the ancient magic it's pages held tingling her skin. A small part of her wanted to thrust it back at him.

“...why are you helping me, Leo? You know that if Xander ever finds out about this, he'll disown you just like he did with me. You shouldn't be helping me; you should be killing me, killing all of us, defending your country!” That was what he wanted, that was what he had been raised to want, just like she had been, right? The blonde boy lowered his eyes, gazing down at the ground at his feet. The soil shifted slightly.

 

“I know. I know that full well, sister, but... if you think that's what I _want_ to do, you're sorely mistaken. Maybe I'm doing the wrong thing, by faltering. Maybe if I killed you all here and now, I could spare us further tragedy up ahead... but maybe not. Maybe if I let you go, you stupid Hoshidans will get it into your head that every moment you spend in Nohr is giving my father another moment to overtake _your_ country and go home.” He glared at them, a glare Takumi returned with interest. Leo sighed deeply. “I know that's wishful thinking, but if I didn't have _any_ hope to hold onto, I'd just go an kill myself right now. Maybe Xander will kill you the second he lays eyes on you, sister, but just maybe you'll be able to wrap him around your little finger one last time and convince him he's wrong. We know he's wrong; _he_ knows he wrong, but like I said... you have to hold onto _some_ hope that you're right.” The Nohrian princess was certain that if she tried to open her mouth to comfort her brother, she'd just start crying, so she instead reached out to draw him into another embrace. Leo whispered to her when they were close.

 

“I think you'll be okay so long as you keep moving forward, sister. That's what we're all doing. I can't lie and say our soldiers won't catch up to you soon, but... you've always been reckless. Jumping off landings, taking on armies against massive odds, telling Camilla her summer dress made her look like a cow...” She smiled a bit. Reckless... maybe she was. Maybe, living a sheltered life had protected her too much from tragedy, and as such, she hadn't learned to fear consequences. She feared them now, but... that wasn't anything Leo needed to know. He needed to think his big sister was still brave and strong.

“Just confident in my ability to land on my feet. Thank you for everything, Leo.” She pressed her lips to his cheek for a moment before pulling away. Nodding, the younger boy walked back over to his destrier, putting one foot in the stirrup and hauling himself up into the saddle.

 

“I'd best leave now. If I take too long, that slime Iago will take it upon himself to investigate what my hold up is. I'm certain we'll see each other again, Nerr; I just hope it's for happier reasons.” He smiled at her, a tiny grin, before calling his retainers to his side. Digging his heels into the horse's sides, he lead them away, further into the woods. It was so tempting to run behind him, to pretend that there wasn't a war going on, that she wasn't surrounded by Hoshidans, and that Leo was just returning to the castle after visiting her at the citadel. She always ran with him, with all her siblings when they left, until they passed the gates of the outer bailey, the limit of where she was allowed to go. It seemed that now, there was an invisible wall blocking her, a wall that seemed to grow higher as a hand rested on her shoulder. She cringed away from it.

 

“That could've gone much worse than it did. I don't approve of you running off on your own, but I'm grateful you kept a steady head an managed to talk down the enemy commander.” Nerr pulled a face, pulling away from Ryouma so she could turn and face him.

“Will it _ever_ penetrate that thick skull of yours, Ryouma? I wasn't talking down an 'enemy commander'; I was talking to my _brother_ , and regardless of what you think of him, you need to realize that he's much, _much_ smarter than you, and take his advice. He's telling you the same thing I am; go back to Hoshido and lead your people before it's too late.” The high prince scowled, leaning closer so he could hiss directly into her ear, keeping the others from hearing.

“And _then_ what, Nerrida? Perhaps I can push Garon's forces back this time. Maybe even the next time he attacks, because there _will_ be a next time. Are we to keep countering until he dies, are we to keep enduring the swarms of Faceless he sends to torment our people? _His_ people?”

 

“Honestly? _Yes_. That's what _I_ would do if I were in your position, because trust me, Ryouma; if you somehow get your wish and kill Nohr's king, I _promise_ _you_ , Xander will not stop until he has burned your country to the ground. You will not stop these attacks; you will make them worse.”

“...haven't you been saying that _you_ wish to exact revenge on King Garon yourself? Do you not feel _you_ would reap similar retribution?” Nerr sighed, feeling tired suddenly. The adrenaline that had pumped through her veins during the battle was beginning to subside, and the toll of fighting (coupled with her lack of sleep) was starting to wear her down.

“...I know I would. I'd most likely be executed in the very instant that dastard took his last breath. But I don't care. The lives he took, the lives he ruined... They deserve justice, and this is the only form of justice I can think to give them.” The high prince remained silent for some time, sighing and crossing his arms over his chest.

 

“...you have the makings of a natural-born leader, Nerrida. It's a shame you would make yourself into a martyr instead.” Nerr huffed, turning her back to her brother.

“What does it matter if I'm a leader; there's nothing for me to lead. No one will listen to me; certainly not _you_. I'm just talking to myself. All of this may as well be in my mind for all the impact it has...” Still clutching the warp tome to her chest, she stalked off, heading back towards one of the more shallow bogs and stepping into it.

 

The feeling of cool water and silt, no matter how tainted it apparently was, calmed her ragged nerves, but only a bit. A small part of her wanted to say “to hell” with Notre Sagesse and this supposed Rainbow Sage, but... Leo had given her that clue for a reason. Not because he wanted to help the Hoshidans kill his father and tear his family and country asunder. Perhaps... perhaps, he thought she could help. That was what she was supposed to do; help her younger siblings with the things they couldn't. Nerr wished nobody would have any faith in her; the truth was, she sincerely doubted she could help anyone, not even herself.

000

 

A/N- I'm gonna level with you; this game just kind of makes my brain crash and then try to reboot when I play it. Anyone, with any sense, would be able to tell that someone like Garon isn't going to surrender or step down from power until he's _dead_. Which means that the _ONLY_ way the Hoshidans can beat him... is to kill him. And the Nohrian siblings are all like, “well.... okay, I'm gonna let you go and keep on with your quest to kill our dad, but only this once!” And it's one thing for them to not want to kill the avatar, but... you'd think they'd maybe just pull her to one side and unleash an army of Faceless on the rest of the Hoshidans. But then, the story would be over by now. That's why I kinda tried to make Leo's reasoning that, if he _doesn't_ kill them- because he doesn't want to, he's not a monster- maybe they'll just go back home. Only, he should've learned from Nerr's mistake back in the prologue that sparing Hoshidans just makes them come back even harder to kill, like roaches. Oh well, he'll learn the folly of his kindhearted ways eventually -maniacal cackle-


	16. Concealing Bitterness

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Ch.16- “Concealing Bitterness”

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Nerr had made it quite clear that she was not going to suffer the entirety of the Hoshidan forces accompanying her to Notre Sagesse. Leo had warned her that as few people needed to come as possible, for the warp tome he'd gifted her with was on it's last legs. In all honesty, she would've preferred to go completely alone, but her Hoshidan siblings made it clear they would not allow her to. Besides, she was reluctant to admit, she herself couldn't use the tome. In her youth, she had tried to learn to channel what little magic coursed through her veins, but the only tutor available to her in the Northern Citadel had been Gunther, and his potential for spell casting was even worse than hers. Once she'd picked up a sword, no one had ever suggested she needed to expand her horizons, so she gladly let the subject drop. Now, she wished she had been a bit more diligent in the magical bailiwick.

 

It seemed that Sakura could understand the tome in a fashion; while Hoshidans and Nohrians used different kinds of magic, the runes inscribing the spell were apparently some magical root language. So that meant that, unless she was planning on walking both ways, her little sister would be accompanying her. Her other siblings would not take no for an answer, so that lead to them as well. Her Nohrian companions also insisted on coming along, and while she would rather be in their company than most, she wanted an even number of travelers. Nerr already knew who would not be accompanying her, but she had to them _him_ that. As Sakura and Orochi worked on healing those who had suffered wounds while fighting the Faceless (if they wanted to make themselves useful, they could train while she and the others were away), she summoned Jakob to the outskirts of their makeshift camp. As usual, he had been speaking to Oboro, and the princess was certain it was only reluctantly that her steward tore himself away from the Hoshidan lancer. Still, the moment she approached him, Jakob beamed at her, following her without a word of complaint.

 

“Is something wrong, milady? Are you injured?” She _had_ been injured- she'd taken an arrow to the leg, but Felicia had seen about that long before. Nerr shook her head, continuing to walk further and further from camp.

“You and Oboro are very close. Are the two of you lovers?” The older man sputtered, his face turning bright red. She didn't know why he was so embarrassed; it was plain as day. Jakob _never_ socialized with anyone before. ...she should've been grateful for the change. She waited for him to compose himself, and while the comical gasping stopped, his cheeks remained flushed as he nodded. Was that really so hard? “You didn't tell me.”

 

“I-I'm very sorry for that, milady. It's just... it happened so quickly- one day, we're at each other's throats, and the next--” Nerr held up her hand to silence him; she was not interested in hearing anyone's happy love stories.

“Why didn't you tell me? I'm your liege; you're _supposed_ to tell me these things.” Jakob hung his head, shamefaced.

“...I know, Lady Nerr. I-- I'm not sure why I didn't tell you. I suppose a part of me was... afraid.”

 

“Afraid?”

“Afraid you might... forbid it.” Well. She had her reason, at least. Given that he was her retainer _and_ steward, she was well within her rights to tell him he couldn't be in a relationship whilst in her service.

“Why would I do such a thing, Jakob? You've always been loyal to me... ...you _a_ _re_ loyal to me, aren't you?” The steward looked up, his eyes almost hurt as he nodded vehemently.

“Of course I am! There is nothing I would not do for your sake, milady!” The princess smiled slightly. She loved hearing that. When it seemed the bonds she'd spent years forging meant so little, it did her heart good to hear someone tell her they were loyal...

 

“You mean that?”

“Absolutely. I would throw myself on your sword if you asked it, after I polished it to a gleam, of course.” Such a silly man... Nerr's smile widened, and she looked up, staring into his deep, purple eyes.

“Then kill Oboro.” Those eyes widened comically as Jakob's mouth fell open a bit. He moved it, as though he were trying to speak, but couldn't find the words.

“W-what?”

“You heard me.” Her expression had not changed, at least, not consciously. As far as Nerr knew, she was still smiling. “I said, 'kill Oboro'. You don't think I forgot what that bitch did last night, do you? Clearly, she does not feel the same level of loyalty to me that you do; if I were ever to have another slip up around her beloved 'Takumi-sama' again, I have no doubt that she would kill me to protect her liege... So I'm ordering you to preempt that and kill _her_ instead.” The steward seemed to be trembling a bit, shaking his head slightly as he whimpered quietly.

 

“M-milady... Lady Nerr... y-you can not _mean_ that... I... I don't know if I...” He trailed off, looking away, his expression utterly miserable. Sighing, the princess reached out, touching his arm slightly.

“Jakob. You know full well that I didn't mean that. I'd never ask you to kill someone you love... That was just a test.” Jakob looked back at her, shocked for a moment, before he breathed a loud sigh of relief that turned into a quiet laugh, the tension visibly leaving his body.

“Oh... Oh, thank goodness! I was frightened for a moment there, milady--” Nerr laughed quietly as well, matching his tone.

“No, no, it's fine. Everything's fine. In fact, now, you can completely devote yourself to her. I no longer require your services, Jakob.” The relief on the butler's face melted away, leaving only blank faced horror.

 

“...what?” She nodded, still smiling in what she hoped was a sweet, understanding manner, even though her heart was beating out of her chest.

“I would never order you to kill anyone for my sake, Jakob. I just wanted to know if you _would_ , if you were as loyal as you claimed. You _aren't_. I don't know what I did wrong; if I asked too much of you, or didn't pay enough attention to you, or if you've just outgrown me... but your loyalty isn't to _me_ anymore.”

“That's not true!” He was arguing the point, saying that, regardless of who he may have been in a relationship with, she would always be his liege, but Nerr wasn't listening to him anymore. He had proven irrefutably where his loyalties laid last night, when he paid her no mind as she lied on the ground, injured. She'd never felt so uncared for, so lonely... Misery welled up inside her.

 

“...terrible...” Jakob stopped his pleading for a moment, thrown for a loop by her mumbling.

“What did you say?”

“I said, you're terrible.” She whispered, unable to raise her voice any higher with tears choking her. “If I'd ordered Gunther to do something, he would've just nodded and done it... if he were alive, he wouldn't just stand by while Hoshidan sluts club me over the back of the head... he wouldn't put some _whore_ before me... he was so much _better_ than you, better than you could _ever_ be...” She swallowed, trying to even out her voice before she looked back up at her former steward. “...you're dismissed, Jakob.”

 

She turned away from him once more, not wanting to see his sadness or anger, not directed at her. He should be happy; clearly, his heart was no longer in his duties, and now, he was free of them. Free of her. Terrible... she was the terrible one. She helped no one, and death followed in her wake. Honestly, it should've been a burden lifted for both of them; Nerr had been wanting to say those words for so long, but had never been able to work up the nerve. Now... now, when she thought she might've felt some kind of relief, all she felt was an even more crushing weight. Terrible...

000

 

With final orders given to those who remained behind and their traveling party finally prepared, Nerr and her Hoshidan siblings huddled close to Sakura as she began reciting the warp spell. The only words she understood from the chanting were “Notre” and “Sagesse”. She didn't have long to dwell on them, however, for everything seemed to grow exceedingly bright very quickly. Suddenly, it felt as though she were being torn apart. Not in the manner that she was familiar with, the sensation of being stretched out on the rack when she transformed. This was entirely new; it was as if the very fabric of her being was unraveling. She could not open her mouth to scream, for it had unwound into hundreds of thousands of threads that felt as though they were being rolled into a skein before finally getting restitched into a Nerr-shaped object. Her feet were on solid ground, but for all she knew, she was standing sideways on a wall. Regardless of where (or how) she was, the princess lurched forward and retched. It felt like the contents of her stomach had shifted during transport, and clearly, she was not alone in that feeling. The sound of multiple people gagging and heaving around her sent her into another vomiting fit. It wasn't until her eyes were watering and her entire body hurt that she could finally stop and straighten up, wiping her mouth with her sleeve and wishing she had something to wash the sour taste out with.

 

“Urgh... oh gods... I've made up my mind; I'm _walking_ back after this...” Sakura was still doubled over, clutching her stomach.

“Oh... I-I don't think I've ever been s-s-so sick in my life...” Felicia straightened, her complexion tinged with green.

“I-- I think that's all of it-- urp!” She clapped a hand over her mouth. “Nope!” The maid barely managed to make it two steps before vomiting again, and Nerr had to turn away and cover her ears to keep from following suit. How did mages like Leo and Iago use warp spells on a constant basis, how did it not _kill_ them? Surprisingly, Azura of all people seemed the least affected by the sudden jarring of instantly teleporting across the country. Though she seemed a bit queasy, at least she wasn't dry heaving like the rest of them as she rubbed Hinoka's back.

 

While everyone else was distracted being sick, the Norhian princess took the opportunity to slip away, mostly to get away from the stench of bile and regurgitated food. They seemed to have relocated to a harbor of some sorts. She could see the docks with boats anchored near them, mostly small fishing vessels, though one decently sized merchant ship bobbed in the waves. Small houses strew the seaport, their stone facades weathered by the wind and waves. Despite this seemingly being a fishing village, it appeared that no one was about. The docks were deserted, as were the ships them self. No sounds seemed to be coming from the houses, no people talking or laughing or arguing. No smoke curled up from the chimneys. There were not even rats scurrying into the cracks and crevasses lying around. It was as if no one lived there.

 

Nerr had heard about such things, villages that had been overtaken by plagues so quickly, no one was left alive. One house's door was slightly ajar, and the princess decided to approach, more out of curiosity than anything else. She could not see inside, which unnerved her. It was dark, to be sure, but her sharp eyes usually cut through the darkness with ease. The darkness revealed by the cracked door seemed... flat. Almost as if it had been painted, to give the _impression_ of an open door. As Nerr got closer, close enough to reach out and touch the handle, another hand appeared from within the darkness, unnaturally white, and grabbed the handle, slamming it shut in her face. It may have been undignified, but the princess jumped, screaming aloud as another hand grabbed her shoulder.

 

“Nerrida! Calm yourself, it's only me!” Never had she been so relieved to see Ryouma as in that moment. Sighing deeply, she rested her hand on her chest to calm her breathing.

“Haaah.... is everyone done being sick?” The high prince, who looked a bit ill himself, nodded.

“It seems that way. We may need to hurry; Scarlet informed me that Notre Sagesse has been a Nohrian territory for some decades now. The last thing we need is to run into any soldiers that might be stationed here.”

 

“I don't think _anyone_ is stationed here. It looks completely deserted. How in the hell are we going to find this 'Rainbow Sage'?” Ryouma frowned thoughtfully, crossing his arms over his chest and following his younger sister's gaze across the town.

“Hmm... it _does_ seem as though no one lives here. But there must be _someone._ We'll just have to find that someone and interrogate them.” Nerr frowned as well, though hers was born of anger. Did Ryouma go to towns in Hoshido and “interrogate” people there?

“ _OR_... and hear me out... we could just try _talking_ to people. You know, like how humans do. I know you see all Nohrians as just obstacles to be cut down, but the people here aren't criminals for you to put the screws to, Ryouma. This is their home, not yours, and you have no right to have that kind of mentality towards civilians.” To her surprise, the prince did not argue that all Nohrians were a threat that could report them to the king and get them killed like she was expecting him to. The brunette man's shoulders slumped slightly, a guilty look in his eyes.

 

“...you're right, sister. I often forget that not all Nohrians are soldiers. Many times since her death, I've worried about living up to our mother's legacy. I have no hope of leading us to the peace she dreamed of if I can't stop myself from seeing every foreigner I meet as a threat.” Well... _that_ had certainly taken a turn she had not anticipated. A small part of Nerr wanted to ask her blood brother why it was their _mother's_ legacy he was concerned about, rather than their father's, but even as she began thinking how to word such a thing, she noticed a figure walking a few meters ahead of her, before it ducked behind another house.

 

“I just saw someone!” Without waiting to see if she was being follow, the Nohrian girl ran after the fleeting shadow, desperate to see that _someone_ was living in this town. It wasn't that she wasn't used to desolation; she had grown up around it. But there hadn't been signs that people should've been living in the citadel. Aside from the library and kitchen, it may well have been abandoned as well.

 

Leo had said nothing about Notre Sagesse being abandoned, so she had every reason to assume that people _lived_ those houses. After all _, someone_ had slammed that door shut in her face, though as she recalled that, pale, slender hand reaching out from the flat, unrealistic darkness, she shuddered violently. She was beginning to wish she had waited for Ryouma, for _anyone_ , so she was not running through this ghost town alone, but she needed to find the person she'd seen before they vanished... hopefully it _was_ a person, and not... anything else. Nerr turned the corner of the house she had seen the shadow slip behind, and sighed again, feeling relief flood her body. It seemed to have been an old man, a _very_ old man, hobbling forward as he leaned heavily on his walking stick. It wasn't a monster. Or a ghost. Or anything else mortal minds could not ken. Slowing to a brisk walk, she cleared her throat quietly, not wanting to startle the man (gods knew _she_ would be easily spooked in this hellhole).

 

“Um, excuse me? Sir? Do you have a moment?” The man stopped, slowly turning around to face her. She could not tell if he was squinting because he could not see her well, or if his many wrinkles were just giving him the impression of squinting. She stepped a bit closer so he could see her better regardless.

“Hmm? Oh, oh, of course, my child. Are you lost?”

“Nerrida!” The princess looked over her shoulder to see the others, led by Ryouma, hot on her heels. The high prince skidded to a stop beside her, giving her a reproachful glare.

“How many times do I have to tell you not to run ahead? I swear, it's like you're five...”

“Well then, maybe you should keep up.” She sneered back. She was in no mood to get in an argument with Ryouma, especially not in front of a stranger, but it seemed the old man wasn't too fussed with the sight of royalty bickering before him. He smiled widely, showing what few teeth he had left, as he gazed upon the group.

 

“Is there a troupe in town? Your costumes are splendid- just splendid! You look just like Hoshidans warriors. Are you putting on a-- a historical play? I love history.”

“I'll bet; you were probably there for most of it...” Takumi muttered under his breath, and Hinoka cuffed him on the ear. Ryouma opened his mouth, getting ready to correct the man, but fortunately, Silas spoke up before he could.

“Uh, unfortunately, we won't be putting on a show here. We're just... passing through.” Nerr nodded, smiling and hoping it didn't look as strained as it felt.

“That's right. We're looking for an old... acquaintance.” That sounded better than “friend”; someone could call her out on that right away. “Some people call him the 'Rainbow Sage'. Have you heard of him?” The old man's genial expression faded for a moment.

 

“...you know the Rainbow Sage? Next you're going to be telling me he's your friend! Hoo hoo hoo! So you're a traveling comedy team- is that it?” It was hard to tell what bothered her more; that look in his small eyes that said he knew she was bullshitting him, or the fact that he found it amusing. The princess frowned, putting her hands on her hips as she stared the still chuckling man down.

“Why do you find that funny? I'll have you know the Rainbow Sage would be lucky to call me a friend- I'm delightful!” She exhaled sharply through her nose, dropping her arms. “Alright, I may have misspoken earlier. I haven't made this sage's acquaintanceship... _yet_. But I'm hoping to, which is why I was wondering if you might have any idea where I can find him.” At once, the old man's jovial demeanor fell away, and he gave Nerr a sharp look.

“Let me spare you a great deal of pain- give up now. Almost nobody has visited the Rainbow Sage and lived.”

“But some people have.” Ryouma said, his eyes dark. “A man from Nohr, a prince by the name of Xander, with golden hair... He is one of the few that survived, yes?” The stranger's serious nature was at once replaced with good humor once more as he chuckled slightly.

 

“Oh, yes. I remember him. You're quite knowledgeable for actors, but I suppose traveling all over lets one glean a great deal of information. I believe Prince Xander was the fourth this century to meet the sage and survive.” That raised a number of questions amongst the royals.

“The fourth?”

“This _century?”_

“Oh yes. I can't tell you about centuries past- those are lost to the annals of time, but in the last few decades... The first I remember was Sumeragi, the former emperor of Hoshido! A young King Garon also made the pilgrimage, and he's still kicking. I hear the third individual was a knight, a young man from Nohr. I haven't heard anything about him, so I suppose he must not have flaunted whatever the Sage did for him... But yes, Prince Xander was the fourth, if memory serves me correct.” A silence seemed to fall over them, Azura voicing aloud what it seemed was on everyone's mind.

 

“Unbelievable... We're following in the footsteps of Emperor Sumeragi and King Garon... and who knows how many other sovereigns have trekked these lands as well...” Well, as far as Nerr was concerned, it was fine and dandy that both her fathers had taken the same pilgrimage that she was, but...

“I'm more interested in this mystery knight; _he's_ the one I'm curious about.” It seemed so... out of place with the rest of the people listed. Royalty, leaders of lands locked in an endless feud tracing back to the heyday of the gods themselves.... what did some random, nobody of a squire have to do with such an epos? The old man chuckled under his breath, murmuring quietly.

“Hoo hoo hoo, that doesn't surprise me...” She ignored that obvious jab in her direction.

 

“Well, thank you stranger, for the warning, but that just makes me more determined. Since you know all this, is there any chance you know where the Rainbow Sage can actually be _found?”_ He sighed, leaning heavier on his staff.

“Well, if you insist; it's your funeral... See that mountain over there?” He lifted an arm that trembled from the exertion, pointing with great difficulty over the rooftops. Nerr followed his gaze, where there was indeed a tall peak, the white stone shining against the dark Nohrian sky. “That there's Mount Sagesse. And at it's peak lies the Sevenfold Sanctuary.”

“I see. And this sanctuary, that's where one can find the sage?”

“If the legend is to be believed, then yes. He supposedly resides on the top floor.” The man lowered his arm, breathing heavier and looking grim. “But let me warn you one more time; most people never even make it to the summit alive.” The Nohrian princess frowned slightly, never tearing her gaze from the mountain. It reminded her of the jagged peaks that surrounded the Norther Citadel, only they had been darker. Peaks she would probably never get to see again because of Garon, who himself had scaled the mountain looming over them and came out stronger. Hatred filled her, seeping out of her pores. Clearly, this Rainbow Sage did not discriminate based on intent (and if he had anything to say because she lacked a penis, he would soon lack one as well).

 

“Again, I appreciate the warning, but I'm not most people. If a knight I've never even heard of can make it there and back in one piece, then so can I.” Nerr would've been lying if she'd said that it was bravery that inspired her words. If anything, it was spite. She would see this sage and get whatever strength he could bestow on her just to throw it in Xander and Garon's faces when she next saw them. She would call her brother out for all the lies he told her about how training was the only way to get stronger, all the lies he told her about caring for her when he allowed himself to be swayed so easily, just like Jakob... She was pulled from her grim thoughts by a wheezing chuckle.

 

“Hoo hoo! You've got balls of brass, missy! You probably wouldn't be so brave if you'd heard all the rumors about that place that I have. Rooms full of poison snakes... trap doors everywhere... the walking dead...” Sakura cried out in fear, clinging to Hinoka's robes.

“Th-those are just rumors... r-r-right...?”

“How should I know? I suppose only those who have been there themselves can know for sure, but I've heard that the sanctuary exists as a trial, meant to put the one being tested to their limits. It exists to make people suffer.” Nerr scoffed under her breath.

 

“And what doesn't?” Still, despite her bitterness, she was very grateful, and managed to smile at the old man sincerely. “Thank you, sir. We truly appreciate all the information you've given us.” He laughed, reaching out and taking one of her hands in both his weathered ones.

“It's my pleasure, dear child. Good luck to you all. Oh, and try not to die. Hoo hoo hoo!”

“You're not my father- don't tell me what to do.” She teased slightly, though it was a bitter reminder that dying was exactly what her father _would_ have her do. Ryouma turned toward the others.

“You heard him, everyone. I heartily second that advice. Now, let's make our way up that mountain.”

000

 

After edging through the town, the mountain was a veritable delight. Despite their group being smaller than it had been since they'd left Fort Jinya, everyone seemed on edge, keeping to the shadows, avoiding windows as much as possible, as though at any moment, someone might spot them. But there was no one _to_ spot them, it seemed. Silas affirmed that, last he had known, Notre Sagesse was a quiet, but well populated town. It was possible that perhaps there had been something back on the mainland that everyone had gone to see, but Felicia shot down that theory. Back in her village, even when there had been great festivals, there were always some people who couldn't attend- the very old and sick, new mothers, the simple...

 

The desolation of Notre Sagesse was unnatural, and Nerr was certain she was not alone in wanting to hurry up the mountain so they could get they hell out of here and never look back. Despite the ground being rough, full of large, jagged rocks that jutted out at sharp angles, she barely noticed them digging into her feet. She could hardly remember those early days when even the tough grass and twigs of Hoshido's ground tore at her bare soles, unused to anything but smooth stone. Her feet were now as rough and calloused as her hands, as scarred as the rest of her (though the darker, thicker hide on her right leg seemed to afford slightly more protection). Given how little she complained, it seemed likely that Azura was much the same way, but despite how tough her feet may have been, the singer had no endurance. She had stumbled no less that three times already, and they were barely halfway up the summit. Nerr reached out to catch the songstress as she stumbled again, raising a brow as the other princess looked back at her.

 

“Walk much?”

“Shut up.” She panted, though there was no animosity in her voice. Azura sighed, and slumped forward, though the other girl kept a hand on her back just in case she decided to go tumbling back down the mountain. “Oh, I've never been so exhausted in my life... I thought that after six months of marching, I'd have built up _some_ stamina by now, but I'm still just as weak as I ever was...”

“You're not weak, Azura. You're... uh...” Nerr tried to think of a kinder synonym, but was drawing a blank. The Hoshidan princess noticed, fixing her with a moody look.

“...gee. Thanks.”

 

“I mean it, though,” She said quietly, but sincerely. “Maybe you're not good at... _moving_ , but you're definitely not weak. A weak person would've given up a long time ago, but you're still here, standing by your siblings, no matter _how_ easy it would be for you to die out here.” The singer stared at her for a long moment, before a tiny smile tugged at her lips. She straightened a bit.

“Thank you, Nerr. That actually means a lot coming from you. I do worry sometimes that I'm more of a burden than a help...”

“I can think of several people in this rag tag group who are far more burdensome than you.”

 

“Hey!” Ryouma, who had, along with Takumi, been pushing ahead, called back to them. “Don't linger! This mountain must be treacherous for a reason; the last thing we need is to get caught in a landslide.” Nerr scowled up at the older man.

“This mountain is treacherous because people like _him_ get pushed off by people like _me..._ ” Azura giggled slightly.

“Cut him a little slack, Nerr. I know Ryouma can come across as domineering- especially towards you- but he means well. He would do everything in his power to help you if you would let him...”

“I'm not that desperate yet.” The Nohrian girl said coolly. The singer seemed to realize this conversation was nearing it's end, and sighed, though she lightly laid her hand on the other woman's wrist.

 

“...even if you feel you don't want or need anyone's help... I'm standing at _your_ side as well, Nerr.” Nerr desperately wanted that to be true. It seemed that she was losing people from her corner by the day. Still, as grateful as she was for the sentiment, she'd had her fill of mushy, heartfelt moments for the day. Perhaps it was because she'd gone so long without affection, but it was getting hard to stomach too much of it.

“...you okay to walk on your own?” Azura nodded, inhaling deeply.

“I'm fine. And if not, I think I'll take Hinoka up on her offer to ride with her.” Their older sister was circling above them, making sure no one fell back too far. Knowing that at least someone else could babysit the songstress, the Nohrian princess took off running, quickly passing Sakura and Felicia, who were riding Silas's destrier as he lead the horse by the reins. It only took a few seconds of a full run to surpass Ryouma and Takumi as well. She'd missed running free so badly... It was a cruel irony, that although she had finally broken free of her confines, she would not run anywhere.

 

“Hey!” Takumi called out to her. “Stop showing off! You're not impressing anyone!” She slowed to a trot, then to a stop, turning around. They were several meters behind her.

“I'm not showing off, I'm catching up. Like Ryouma wanted me to. It's not my fault you're slow.” She turned and continued on her way, not running, but a brisk walk. Any time she began enjoying herself even slightly, someone was there to ruin it for her. Looking up, Nerr could see a large, white structure nestled at the top of the summit. It shone in the starlight, like a fairytale castle. It was hard to imagine any horrors lurking beneath such a lovely facade. A slight clanking of armor grew louder behind her. She didn't need to turn to know it was Ryouma- he was the only Hoshidan who wore enough armor for it to make a noticeable sound.

“This must be the building the old man warned us about.”

“...I wonder why they call it the Sevenfold Sanctuary- perhaps it leads to seven levels of hell... or forty-nine.”

 

“Hm... given what he said about it making people suffer, that wouldn't be too outlandish a theory.” Nerr quickened her steps, trying to put a bit of distance between her and her blood brother. He always seemed to stand too close for comfort.

“Maybe I should go ahead to get away from you-- I mean... scout.” A large hand reached out, closing around her bicep and turning her around. Ryouma was frowning as usual, his dark eyes looking over her face. What he was searching for there, she did not know.

“...Are you that eager to get away from me, from _us,_ that you would be willing to step into Hell alone?”

 

“...I just want some time to think...”

“You _get_ time! When we make camp, you always run off on your own- what are you doing then if not thinking?” He didn't get it. He didn't understand. As lonely as she felt in the midst of a group of people, she was not _alone_. She wanted solitude, to scream, and cry, and feel sorry for herself without the added shame of an audience. Every time she thought about everything that had happened in the past few weeks, it made her stomach hurt, but how could she focus her thoughts when there were people at every turn? Maybe it was just a side effect of growing up in isolation, maybe other people didn't want to be alone while lamenting their loneliness... She reached up to pry his fingers from her arm, and continued walking.

 

“Nerrida--”

“So, how is this going to work? Are we all seeking the Rainbow Sage's blessing? Is this going to be a contest, survival of the fittest, are we going to be pitted against each other if we all go in together?” The high prince paused.

“I... don't know. I hadn't thought about it like that. It does seem that he only gives his power to one person at a time...”

“Maybe you should spend your time in camp thinking a bit _more_. I suppose we'll just have to wait and see. And if the sage only _does_ give his power to one person, well.. _he'll_ have to decide for us.” In the farthest reaches of her mind, Nerr imagined knocking her brothers and sisters out so that _she_ was the only one there to receive whatever holy power they were looking for.

 

Not just because she wanted it for herself- though she did, she would not lie- but because if any of them (barring Sakura and Azura, perhaps) received any kind of divine strength, that would be it. There would be no convincing them to return to Hoshido anymore- they would not stop until they'd destroyed everything they perceived as a threat to their country, which, in the cases of Hinoka and Takumi at least, seemed to be everything on this side of the border. As they drew closer, a pair of large, stone pillars seemed to serve as the border of the gateway. They looked ancient, long since worn down by the elements. At first glance, they appeared completely smooth, but there were some kind of markings on them. Nerr reached out, brushing the dust and grit from one of the columns, feeling engravings under her fingers. They were characters, _old_ characters, ones she had only ever seen in books during her history lessons. _Leave now, lest you be of desires pure_. What nonsense. What was the point of writing warnings in long dead Nohrian tongues when clearly, they didn't apply to anyone in the first place? Sakura whimpered loudly, backing away from the entrance the moment she'd approached it.

 

“I-I don't like this place... It f-f-feels... _wrong_...”

“It's just an old building; what can be so wrong about it?” Takumi looked at his sister, then back to the sanctuary, scoffing slightly. “You're just letting that old man's rumors get to you.” Hinoka's voice was kinder.

“You don't have anything to worry about, Sakura-chan. We've faced way scarier things than this. Even if something pops out, we'll protect you.”

000

 

The sanctuary was not locked, though it was odd that Nerr would think it would be. It was a “sanctuary” on top of a massive mountain- who would they be trying to keep out? She pushed the heavy, wooden door open, stepping inside, her Hoshidans siblings and companions following her. A chill ran up her spine the moment she walked in. There was nothing out of the ordinary, she was sure (she had never been inside a religious institute before, so she couldn't be certain). The walls were smooth white plaster, the floor shiny, polished wood. The sweet smell of incense filled the air, smoke curling up from the spherical holders hanging in the corners of the room. Two sets of stairs, one on either side of the room, led up, presumably to the next level. A small part of her wanted to turn around and walk back out. She was beginning to understand what Sakura had mean about the place seeming _wrong_ , and it seemed that it was starting to draw on the others as well.

 

“Is it just me,” Silas said slowly. “Or does anyone else get the feeling we shouldn't be here?” Ryouma shook his head, walking towards the left hand staircase.

“We didn't come this far to falter now. We just need to keep our guard up and stick together.” The high prince had put one foot on the stairs when a loud thumping above them sent everyone on edge. They drew their weapons, everyone's eyes wide as they darted around, their breath held collectively.

 

It sounded like someone was walking around on the floor above them, either someone with very heavy steps, or else... more than one someone. Tightening her grip on the Yato's hilt, Nerr forced her feet to move forward. Hoshido's heir, despite his brave words, had actually backed away from the stairs as those steps seemed to come closer. But he had been right- there would've been no point in coming if they had just left at the sound of people walking. For all they knew, it was the curate who tended the sanctuary- wouldn't they feel silly then? Keeping that thought in mind, Nerr took a step up. The footsteps above her seemed fainter now, as if they were further away, but that made her even more nervous because now, she had to strain her ears to hear them. She took another step, then another. She knew there was still stepping above her, she just couldn't hear it. The silence was deafening. Biting her lip until a metallic tang seeped onto her tongue, the Nohrian princess willed herself to stay calm, and peeked out onto the landing. There was nothing there. No one. It was an empty room, similar to the one they were all standing in. Sighing deeply, she looked back down to the others.

 

“There's no one there- the coast is clear.” Hinoka frowned at her words.

“How is that possible? We heard footsteps.”

“Maybe we scared them off? Or maybe they just went somewhere else. It doesn't matter- if you're coming, then come on.” Feeling much more at ease, Nerr continued walking, stepping into the second floor. It was a larger room, but the incense didn't smell as good here.

 

A table was set up along one of the walls, and as the others came in after her, she walked over to it. There were candles, the beeswax smoking ever so slightly as it melted, dripping own the sides of the pillars and onto the silver holders. Flowers lined the table as well, laid out as though they were offering, though the leaves and petals were no longer soft, taking on the texture of paper as they dried. Tucked among the dying flowers was a doll... at least, part of one. A head and torso with one arm. It reminded Nerr of the ceramic dolls Camilla used to bring her to play with when she was little, though this one must not have been as well made as her sister's. It didn't have the pretty glass eyes, or smooth silk-thread hair... but it looked like it should. There were holes where eyes could go, where hair could be punched in. Who would put up a half completed doll as an offering? Frowning slightly, she reached out, picking the toy up. The way she held it, tilted slightly, a thick, viscous, oily substance began running from the holes in it's head. The smell was unbearable, like something had crawled into it and died. Covering her mouth and nose with her free hand, the princess quickly replaced the doll, making a mental note to never question offerings again.

 

“Nerr.” Trying to keep from jumping, she turned to see Azura standing behind her. The songstress frowned slightly.

“What is it?” Nerr shook her head.

“Nothing. Is there... anything here? Aside from the untended alter?” The other woman shook her head as well.

“No. At least, not that we can see. We should've brought Saizou or Kagerou; they'd have a better chance of sniffing out traps than we do.”

 

“Well, maybe there _aren't_ traps. It's a _sanctuary_ after all; it might just be an old church or temple where some wise hermit decided to take refuge.”

“I can only pray you're right, Nerr. This place even makes _me_ uncomfortable...” It seemed to make _everyone_ uncomfortable. Felicia's eyes were wide as they darted back and forth, and Takumi's knees were visibly shaking, along with the rest of him. It seemed wrong that an empty building could put everyone so badly on edge, but... perhaps that was the problem. Nearly everywhere they went, they had been accosted by enemies. To find none was unnerving to say the least. Nerr frowned, looking towards the staircase in the far corner.

 

“Well, it looks like there's nowhere left to go but up, so that's where I'm going.” Adjusting her grip on her sword, the Nohrian princess headed towards the staircase, freezing the moment she heard something. It was very faint, and didn't sound like it was coming from above; rather... it seemed to be coming from the wall against which the alter sat. A very faint sound, almost like someone was scratching at the wall, trying to get in... or out. But, that was impossible- there was no door leading in that direction. Just a solid wall. Repressing a shudder, she continued towards the stairs, taking each one much slower than before. She could hear her Hoshidan siblings close behind her. A cursory glance into the next room revealed that it, too, was deserted. As Nerr stepped fully into the chamber, she frowned. It looked exactly like the one she had just left. Right down to the alter, though the candles were burned down even further, the flowers more dead, their petals turning brown.

 

“They didn't have a very inspired interior decorator here, did they?” Hinoka said quietly. It sounded like it was meant to be a joke, but her voice was too tight to hold any amusement. Silas, who had been looking at a spot on the floor, suddenly jolted forward, nearly crashing into Ryouma.

“Okay... I don't know how long ago Prince Xander was here... but I hope to the _gods_ that someone else has been in here recently, because _that_ looks fresh.” He was pointing at the spot near the wall. There was a stain there, dark and slimy, and wriggling slightly. A few maggots lingered, writhing in the remnants of whatever had putrefied there. As disconcerting as that may have been, what was truly upsetting was the hand print on the wall a few feet above it, a dark stain that seemed to smear downward. Takumi groaned and looked away.

 

“Oh, _please_ let that be an animal that got trapped in here...”

“There's a boot in it.” Ryouma's voice sounded too stunned to be horrified. Indeed, the metal plates of a sabaton was visible within the viscera. Nerr stared at it for a moment, unable to look away. She had to physically turn her body to redirect her attention, because her eyes seemed drawn to the spot.

 

“Didn't that old man say that most people who come here don't survive? Well... now we have proof, I guess.”

“I want to go home...!” Sakura cried, burying her face in her arms. Azura stepped closer to her, pulling the younger girl protectively towards her.

“Don't be afraid, Sakura. You'll be fine, I promise.”

“Maybe some of you _should_ go back out.” The Nohrian princess looked around. Aside from the suspect stain and alter, there was only another ladder leading to the next landing. “You guys aren't here for power; you don't need to go through this. Just wait outside, I'll be fine on my own.” Takumi, still white faced, approached her, scowling.

 

“If we leave you on your own here, you'll probably end up as a stain, too.” Nerr felt her jaw tense as she looked at the younger boy.

“...that really wouldn't bother you.” Perhaps sensing the tension between the siblings, Azura spoke up once more.

 

“I think Nerr is right. _All_ of us don't need to be here. I'll take Sakura out.” Hinoka and Silas decided that it would be best if they went as well, in case any threats showed up. The remaining royals, as well as Felicia, watched them head back down the stairs. A small part of Nerr wished she could join them, but she knew that she still had to continue heading higher. The knowledge that Xander had done the same trial (or at least, something similar), heartened her slightly. When she could no longer hear her sisters walking on the steps, she made her way towards the other stairs. There was a thick coating of dust on them, save for the middle, which seemed to have been wiped clean, as if somethings had dragged along it. She could feel the dust sticking to the soles of her feet as she trudged up. Her hands were sweating profusely in her gloves. Not even bothering to look around this time, she stepped onto the next floor, and nearly collided with Azura. The songstress yelped in fear, dashing over to Hinoka.

 

“Azura? What the hell are you doing here?”

“What are _you_ doing here!?” Silas's eyes were wide as he stared at them. “I thought you guys were going upstairs!”

“This _is_ upstairs.” Felicia's voice trembled as much as the rest of her as she spoke. They had finally come across a room that was designed somewhat differently, lacking an alter, at least. A heavy chest, lacquered with golden bands, stood in the corner. Heavy, fraying ropes were tied around it, denoting that whatever it contained should probably _stay_ contained. The layout of the room, however, was the same, with yet another staircase leading up. It seemed there _had_ been people in this place recently, for plates, some still containing food, were scattered among the steps, forks and knives, even glasses, some a little less than half empty. Either a few people had sat down for a meal together, or one person had been very hungry. Fat, black roaches skittered over the abandoned meal. For a moment, it reminded Nerr of the kitchen of Northern Citadel, when Jakob and Flora and Felicia hadn't gotten around to washing the dishes yet. Roaches scurried over them, too. There were six plates; enough for a nice, family sit down... The Nohrian princess turned around, heading back down the stairs.

 

“Nerrida, where are you going?” She did not turn to face Ryouma, letting her voice carry to him as she headed down.

“Clearly, this is an unholy, demonic playground where mortals were not meant to tread.”

“What about the Rainbow Sage's blessing?”

“Fuck that shit; I'm leaving! I'm-- ohhhhhhhh... ffffffuuuuuucccckkk...” She could hear her voice cracking, but did not care. People were crowding behind her on the stairs, but she couldn't move to let them down. She didn't want to step foot on the ground. There was nothing wrong with it, aside from being a bit dusty, with a few rat droppings in the corners along the base boards... but it was clearly not the room they had just left. Hinoka's voice cracked as well as she spoke, a high whine of fear.

 

“How the hell is this room bigger than it was before?”

“Why is there a corner?” Nerr moaned, her eyes burning with tears. “Why is this leading to something else...?” It shouldn't have been possible, there weren't even _doors_ in the rooms they had walked through, and now, they had stumbled upon a hall. Behind her, Sakura had begun crying softly.

 

A small part of her wondered if Leo had told them to come to this nightmare just to get rid of them, but she knew her brother was not that vindictive. The old man they'd spoken to even said that four people before them had come here and made it out alive. Xander seemed no worse for the wear. Maybe it was just a bunch of spooky rooms designed to make people flee in terror, and those who pushed through their fear were rewarded. At that moment, the only reward Nerr wanted was a gods damned exit, and she began whispering prayers that they would find one soon. Breathing deeply, and feeling herself grow a bit lightheaded, the Nohrian princess stepped down, the floorboards creaking slightly under her weight. There didn't seem to be anything strange about the hall- it reminded her almost of the long corridors of Castle Krakenburg, only this one was cleaner and brighter. The corner was coming up- there had never been anything scary around the corners either in the castle _or_ in the citadel. The scariest thing _she'd_ ever run into in either of those places had been the king, and surely _he_ wasn't going to be here. Relaxing a bit, Nerr took one step around the corner before throwing herself back, toppling into Ryouma, who was right behind her. The high prince caught her, his face dark with worry.

 

“What is it, Nerrida?” He whispered urgently, his eyes gleaming with panic. It seemed the so-called “sanctuary” was finally getting to him, too. She shook her head wordless, mouth moving, but no sound coming out. Her heart was thundering in her chest so painfully, she felt like she was going to die at any moment. Ryouma set her upright, pushing past her a bit to peek around the corner, quickly pulling back. He stood there, his back against the wall, in silence for a moment, before a massive shudder coursed through him. “...coming here was a mistake.”

 

Bolstered by the fact that she wasn't crazy, Nerr peeked back as well, feeling a chill creep up her spine. The adjacent hall was darker, many of the wall mounted torches extinguished, but they could still see. Halfway down it stood a man. He didn't seem to be facing them, though given that he was half in the darkness, it was impossible to tell. He wasn't doing anything threatening, not walking towards them or even surveying the area. He was just... standing there, cringing occasionally, in pain it seemed. If she strained her ears, she could just make out wheezing and gurgling. She pulled back, looking up at Ryouma desperately. Never in her life had she wished Xander or Gunther were there with her more. Her Hoshidan older brother was the next best thing.

 

“What do we do?” She whispered hoarsely, afraid that if she was too loud, the... person, whoever he was, would notice her. She wasn't so much afraid of what he would do as just the notion of him _looking in her direction_. “He's just _standing there_. Gods, what do I do!?” The high prince reached up, rubbing his furrowed brows.

“...perhaps he's not our enemy. He may have come here for the same reason as us, and gotten lost just the same as us. Perhaps we should try talking to him.” By that that time, Takumi had reached the corner and peered around it see what all the fuss was about, pulling back just as quickly with a noise that sounded like a cross between what a moose and a badger might make.

 

“Or better yet, maybe we can just knock him out from behind and call it a day. I don't trust a damn thing in this place, people less than anything.” Nerr glared at him.

“You would attack someone just for being in a place? I bet you wouldn't have that same, knee-jerk reaction in Hoshido...” Anger momentarily overtaking her fear, the princess walked forward, though her bravery quickly began diminishing as she stepped closer and closer to the darkness. What she wouldn't give for some beer or wine, some “liquid courage” as it was referred to in literature- a whole cask would probably be a good start. As she took another step, everything was plunged into darkness as the torches all went out, as though they had been doused simultaneously. Nerr was not usually scared of the dark, but usually, she could see where she was. She screamed loudly, the sound bouncing off the walls and mingling with the screams of those behind her. The torches there had gone out, too. But she was afraid to look back, to see if they were okay. She didn't know where the man in front of her had gone- she hadn't heard anything, _couldn't_ have heard anything over the sound of her own screaming. She could hear steps in the darkness, the slight clatter of armor. Ryouma's voice, amidst pants, was quiet.

 

“It's alright, Nerrida. Turn around.”

“ **NO**.” She rasped, shaking her head violently. Her shoulders ached from how stiff they were. “I'm not moving a gods damned muscle... I'm _not_ looking behind me.” In the ghost stories Gunther used to tell her, there was always, _always_ something standing behind you. She would not make _that_ mistake. The impenetrable darkness seemed to flicker slightly as the torches appeared to spark back to life. Her relief was short lived as something barreled into her. Eyes, eyes were all she could see, wide and glassy and _right in her face_. Nerr screamed again, her body moving on instinct, driving the brass blade of the Yato into whatever was in front of her, twisting it for good measure. Someone moaned, a low, guttural, rasping sound.

 

The torches reignited fully, all the way down the hall, casting a warm, inviting glow over the corridor, just in time for the princess to fully see what she had stabbed as it fell onto her. A man's body, probably the same man they had seen in the hall. He was still, no longer cringing or wheezing, blood slowly dripping from the hole in his middle, landing with a soft splat over her bare feet. He wore the armor and maile of a Nohrian archer, but held no bow, not even a quiver. His eyes were still wide, and she could see where it seemed that tears had been streaking down his face for hours, if not days. Whimpering in horror, she pushed him back, the now limp body landing with a loud thud. She hadn't meant to-- it had been a... a knee-jerk reaction... just like she had berated Takumi for minutes earlier.

 

Despite her claims that she was a Nohrian, that she loved and cared about her people, she was still just as willing to cut them down as any Hoshidan. She blinked, feeling tears drip down her face, and reached up with the hand not holding the Yato to wipe them away. She had barely begun to wonder who the poor bastard who's life she just ended was when she noticed that there wasn't a body in front of her any more. The armor, the clothing, remained, but instead of flesh and bone, there was a sickly puddle of thick, foul-smelling muck. Small white mushrooms grew out of it, slimy mold snaking across it's surface, as though it had been there for weeks at least. Yet, the blood dripping from her sword was still fresh. Whimpering slightly, she backed up, looking over her shoulder. She had expected to bump into Ryouma again, he had been right behind her, speaking to her... but he was there no longer. Frowning, the princess turned around, her pace quick as she walked to the corner.

 

“Ryouma? Azura?” She turned it, and nearly walked into a wall. The corridor extended no more than two feet. Crimson eyes widened in terror, her grip on her sword growing slack. They... they had been right there, right behind her a moment ago. They couldn't have gone _past_ her, she would've seen it felt it. There were footsteps, both shod and bare feet, coming from behind her, back the way she had just come. Praying that somehow, they had slipped past her in the dark, Nerr turned and trotted back. The foul puddle was gone, leaving only the patch of mushrooms in it's place, small and white, like a spot of mold on bread. At the end of the hall, she could see a door, so tall it's frame brushed the ceiling. There were faint sounds coming from it, voices- familiar voices. They must've gone ahead, thinking she had done the same. She picked up the pace, but the closer she got to the door, the smaller it seemed. By the time she had reached it, it barely reached her hips.

 

“Nerr? Nerr, where are you?” A feminine voice called to her from the other side.

“I'm here! I'm-- I'm coming, don't go anywhere else without me!” _'Don't leave me, please don't leave me...'_ That was what she wanted to say, but her pride would not let her. Sheathing the Yato and grabbing one of the torches from it's iron sconce, she knelt down, tugging on the handle of the door. It seemed stuck, like the wood had swollen- an regular occurrence for the doors back in the Northern Citadel. It just took a little elbow grease with them, and the same held true for this one. The passageway was so small, Nerr had to get down on all four to get inside, lowering her upper body to be supported on her forearms so that she could hold the torch out in front of her. The moment she had wriggled in completely, the door closed behind her. Not like it had simply swung shut on it's own- she felt it slam against her bare feet. Like it had been pushed forcibly.

 

 

“Nerr!” Still, the voice called out to her from straight ahead, a small comfort. This passageway was not like the rooms or hall they had been in, there was no smooth plaster. Just damp, exposed stone. The smell of mildew and stagnant water filled her nostrils, and she would've liked to cover her nose, but she only had one free hand, and needed it to crawl. Not to mention, her gloves were slick and filthy- they would do nothing to block out the smell. Slowly, she pulled herself forward. There was a door a few yards ahead of her- hopefully this one would not get any smaller, too.

 

Something crawled over her foot, and she cried out, shaking her leg leg and hitting it painfully against the wall. Turning around was impossible, but if she rolled over, she could see behind her. There wasn't anything there, no spiders or roaches. She could see though, against her filthy soles, a few light colored strands of hair. They looked light blue. So maybe Azura's? But... they were much too short to be Azura's. More like... Nerr shut her eyes tightly, wishing she could rub them to wipe the image burned into their lids away. When she opened them, the hair was still there, still clinging to her toes. She had to keep going forward, get to that door, get the hell out of there. If she didn't, if she didn't get the power the Rainbow Sage could bestow upon her, what was the point? She needed to avenge the people she'd cared for, the people who's lives had been lost because of Garon's cruelty... otherwise, why was she bothering? The door was in grabbing distance, so Nerr reached out, prostrate on the slimy, cold stone, and grabbed the handle with her free hand, jiggling it. It didn't budge. Frowning, she pulled herself closer, putting more force behind her pushing, but the door remained jammed. She could hear people talking on the other side, their voices faint, indistinct.

 

“Hello? Can anyone hear me? Open the door, please!” She rattled the knob again, but it remained stuck fast.

“Big sister!” Nerr's blood ran cold. A young girl's voice called out to her, but it seemed muffled by the moldering wood. Still... Sakura never called her “big sister”; always “Nee-sama”, which she had been told by Azura meant the same thing, but still. She could see a spot of light in the door, and crawled closer. There was a hole, blending in seamlessly with the grain of the wood, probably a punched out knot. Swallowing hard, she leaned forward, pressing her eye against it. She could just barely see into the next room, it was so gloomy. She scanned as much as she was able to, trying to find the source of the voice.

 

“Why did you leave us, sister? Why did you leave us all alone?” Crying out, Nerr jumped back, her shoulders and the back of her head hitting the low ceiling hard. As her vision swam through a haze of pain, her grip on the torch slackened, and it fell to the ground, the stale water pooling over the stones extinguishing it. That voice came right from the other side of the door, as if someone was standing right there in front of it. But there hadn't been anyone- she had been looking _right there_. Breathing hard, the Nohrian princess let herself slump forward, resting her head on her forearm.

 

Slowly, she began to weep, quietly at first, but the sound quickly grew louder, filling the entirety of the small chamber. It was like a cell, a prison cell, with no light and no warmth. No smiling faces. No laughter. Only misery. She could just stay in there and wait to die, just like she used to- she was good at that. That's what she had done in Shirasagi, when her attempts to escape had failed and she gave up. Oh, maybe she should've said, “to hell with it” to her old life, embraced her Hoshidan family, forgotten fifteen years worth of happy memories and just started over. That was exactly what they wanted, Ryouma and Hinoka... It was what Takumi resented her for not doing. Forget Leo and Elise? Forget Camilla and Xander? What was the point of having memories at all, then? They could just lock her in the dungeons and keep her there until she lost herself, then sculpt her into the sister they wanted, just like-- just like Garon did... Inhaling deeply, Nerr lifted her head. She hadn't escaped one, cold dark cell just to be thrown into another. Raising her arm, she banged on the door, jumping again as someone on the other side banged back. The princess gritted her teeth. _'Oh, so it's a knocking contest you want...?'_

 

Drawing her arm back as far as it could go, she hit the door again, her fist making a full arc and smashing into the stone floor. The door had been opened before her hand could reach it. Blinking rapidly in the new light, she pulled herself from the tunnel, dusting herself off to no avail. Her entire front was soaked. No sooner than she had stood up did the door slam shut behind her, leaving her trapped in the new room. Not that she had any desire to go backwards, anyway. Going back was impossible. Sighing, feeling utterly drained, Nerr looked around. The room was well lit, even though it had been dark and dreary when she'd viewed it through the makeshift peephole. It seemed to be about the size of her room back in the citadel, though it was shaped quite differently. There were no windows, no external sources of light... Tiles on the floor created esoteric patterns. It would've been pretty had it not been slicked with blood and offal. The congealing mess streaked the walls, running down them and collecting in puddles. The crumbling ruins of what must've been statues lined the walls as well, pieces of steel armor laying amidst the stone fragments, a helmet here, a sword there.

 

There was whispering behind her, coming from the other side of the closed door, that lead to the tunnel she had just escaped. There was no one there. Another door, this one graciously open, stood before. It wouldn't have been easy of course- nothing ever was, or ever would be. Nerr _knew_ it could never be easy, but that didn't stop her heart from seizing in her chest as the door swung shut the moment she drew closer to it. It was almost similar to the doors that lead to the king's chamber back in Krakenburg, but the designs embossed in blue on the heavy white door reminded her more of the vases she had seen while she ran through Castle Shirasagi, looking for an escape. Idyllic landscapes and women in beautiful robes... This door was inlaid with figures as well, angelic subjects who's all too lifelike eyes seemed to follow every move she made, drawing down as she reached out towards them.

 

There was no handle on this door, so she ran her fingers over it, trying to find a gap to dig them into to pry it open. Something was sloshing around her feet. It seemed the viscera dripping down the walls was collecting- it had covered her feet completely and was working it's way up to her ankles. As she looked down, she could even see tufts of hair and loose teeth floating in the sickly soup. Sucking in a sharp breath through her teeth, Nerr redoubled her efforts looking for a way to open the door.

 

“Just give up.” She froze at the sound of a gruff, baritone voice, reluctantly chancing a glance over her shoulder. There was no one there. There was no one anywhere- she was alone. Again. Just as lonely as she had felt in Shirasagi...

“You can't do anything, can you?” This time, the voice was higher, female, rude and scoffing. It seemed... it seemed to be coming from the direction of the rubble around the room. A litany of voices called out to her, their speakers unseen.

 

“You abandoned those that needed you.”

“You're worthless!”

“Liar... You lied!”

“You don't _deserve_ the love that was wasted on you.”

“Instead of destroying everything around you, you should destroy yourself...” As the voices continued deriding her, she began recognizing some of them. The border guards that Ryouma had cut down as they left Chevalier, the leader of the Garou, Kaze, her mother... She stepped away from the door, feeling her throat constrict even as the blood around her ankles began soaking into her tights.

 

“I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry...” She whisper, tears pricking at her eyes once more. “I'm sorry...” She hissed sharply as her heel pressed against something sharp, the edge cutting into her flesh. There was another pile of rubbled, the armor scattered amongst it dark, black and... violet, maybe? It was hard to tell with the offal splattered across it. No, the red tinge was from the blood itself. It was purple. An ax leaned against it, a dark gauntlet attached to it's handle, as if it's stone wielder had refused to relinquish their grasp on it even in death. The articulated fingers tightened on the metal haft, as though a ghostly hand still wore the armor.

 

“I'm sorry, too. Sorry you ever came back.” Nerr's eyes widened, hands reaching up slowly to cover her ears, her fingers brushing against her hairpin as she pressed hard against the pointed cartilage. Rather than block out the sound, or even muffle it, it seemed amplified in her mind, deep and low and painfully familiar. “What was the point? You should've just stayed in Hoshido instead of coming back and making everything worse. How many people have you killed, how many lives have you ruined, lives you would've tried to make better if you hadn't been such a _coward..._ If you had at least sided with the Hoshidans, it would give _some_ justification for what you're doing. But no, you're just running around, complacent in pretending that you have a cause, complicit in watching the people around you suffer... How much blood is on your hands, Nerr?” As if looking for a truthful answer, the princess lowered and glanced down at her hands. The gloves were dirty, stained with water and dust and all manner of who knew what else, but there was no blood on them. The blood was all around her, steadily creeping up her calves. She couldn't even see the rubble any more, just the handle of the ax before her.

 

“...what should I do...?” She asked in a strained whisper. The voice sounded dimmer now, a gurgling sound underlying them.

“Whatever you want; that's all you've _ever_ done.” The other voices, which had fallen away for a moment, came back full force, reminding her of her multitude of sins. _'It's not my fault!'_ She wanted to yell at them, _'It's not my fault things turned out this way!'_ But even though the words, in her own voice, bounced around inside her head, they did not fill her with the resolution that they should have had they been the truth. She wasn't a bad person. She didn't want people to suffer. She had wanted to do the right thing, but... what was the right thing? Give up on the people she considered, in her heart of hearts, to be her family? Pretend that nothing bad had ever happened and returned to employ of a despot? Deep, deep down in the farthest reaches of her soul, she knew exactly what she wanted to do- go to sleep. She was very tired, and it felt like the edges of the hole inside her had further crumbled away, leaving a massive, gaping wound in her heart.

 

Everything hurt. She wanted it to stop. But it wouldn't, not if she stayed here, wherever this eldritch hell was. The voices would never stop tormenting her, reminding her of all the wrong she'd done. Hadn't she promised Kaze's soul that she would do _something?_ A flash of metal caught her eye. The ax handle... setting her jaw, she reached out, picking it up. It felt so unlike a a sword's grip, and she needed both hands to carry it. The silver head was beautifully carved, but dripping with blood. She had never used an ax before, but she remembered watching Gunther use them to chop wood for the citadel, remembered the way he swung it back over his shoulder before bringing it down on an unfortunate log... she remembered him smiling at her when he noticed her watching, and _not_ being angry and disappointed in her... Huffing through her nose, Nerr stalked back over to the door, the blood splashing around her thighs.

 

The eyes of the embossed figures still followed her, watching her, judging her... _'Judge_ _ **this**_ _...'_ She thought bitterly, hefting the ax high and bringing it down with all her might on barrier. Despite it's ethereal appearance, the door did not shatter as she had hoped. However, a spiderweb of fissures appeared across it's shining surface. Bolstered by the knowledge that it was not indestructible, Nerr brought the ax down on it again, and again. It took four blows before the porcelain gave way, ceramic exploding forward. The gore that had been building up drained out, leaving her legs wet. She could not see what lay beyond the door, the darkness too absolute for her eyes to pierce, but it didn't matter. A sheer drop off a cliff would be better than the room she was in. Taking a deep breath, she stepped forward. The princess had to raise her arm to shield it from the light. It wasn't especially bright, but after so much darkness, it was blinding to her.

 

“Nee-sama!!” She had barely begun to regain her bearings when something small collided with her, wrapping around her middle. Peeking out through her fingers (half to keep the light from stabbing her eyes, half out of fear of what she would see), the Nohrian girl saw a head of short pink hair and white robes hugging her tightly.

“Sakura?”

“Nerr! Thank goodness- we were starting to get worried about you.” Feeling that her eyes were as adjusted to the light as they were going to get, Nerr lowered her hand, heart pounding. Everyone was standing there, most wearing expressions of relief (save Takumi, who's expression she couldn't see because he was extremely interested in the opposite wall). She panted, overcome with relief as well.

 

“Oh... you guys are okay... I thought-- I didn't know where-- ...where the fucking hell is this?” Suddenly, the incongruity of where she was standing with where she had just been hit her. It seemed that they were all inside a room. A normal room that one would find in a house, a bit small considering there were eight people in it, but very normal, with windows and a table and chairs that it seemed everyone had been sitting in. One person was still sitting, an old man leaning on his walking stick. He glanced over to her, a smile pulling at the folds of his wizened face.

“Oh. Hello.” For a long moment, Nerr's mind went blank, trying to piece together everything that had happened, but it was like trying to sort through several broken glasses.

“...What the fuck is going on here?! Where the hell are we; how did we get here, how--?!” Ryouma stepped forward, putting his hands on her shoulders.

 

“Calm yourself, Nerrida. Everything is fine--”

“No, it's not fine!! Where the hell did you all go? I turned around and you were gone; I've been looking for you all this time!”

“All _what_ time?” Finally, Takumi turned his attention back to her, frowning slightly. It seemed more confused than upset, but it angered her to see nonetheless. “It's been, what? Two, three minutes? Kind of a long time for someone to walk through a door, but...” The Nohrian girl gaped at him.

 

“ 'Two or three minutes'? I was in there for at least half an hour! How could you have gotten through that door before me- there was no one in the tunnel, and I had to break it to--”

“Nerr...” Azura's voice was quiet and soothing, though she was clearly as confused as the rest of them. “What are you talking about? When the lights came back on, we all went through the door that was in front of us. Then we ended up here. Isn't-- isn't that how you came back?” Crimson eyes met golden, a long beat of heavy silence passing between them.

 

“... **no**.”

“I think I can explain...” The old man got to his feet, still smiling. He closed his eyes, and after a few seconds, a bright flash of light emanated from him, the same as when Nishiki or the Garou transformed. Only, there was no bestial abomination in his place. Just an old man... well, a different old man. This one wore long, deep green robes embroidered with gold. His snowy hair was was still thick, despite his very advanced age, though not as thick as his beard which would've given King Garon's a run for it's money, coming down to his stomach. Though his mouth was concealed, it was apparent from the way his eyes crinkled in the corners that he was still smiling.

“First and foremost, I'd like to welcome you to my home. Would you care for a hot beverage?” Nerr could feel the power radiating from him, like a thousand Dragon Veins coalesced into one being. Perhaps she should've been cowed by such might, and normally, she might have, but she was too burned out, worn down, and upset in general to give a damn.

 

“I would _care_ for you to give me a gods damned explanation! Who the fuck are you!?”

“Ah, where are my manners? I've had many names over the centuries, but I am known by most as the Rainbow Sage.” Everyone, save Nerr, gaped at the man in disbelief.

“ _You're_ the Rainbow Sage?” Hinoka asked breathlessly. “It can't be!”

“Why didn't you say so when we first met you?” Ryouma asked, a touch of annoyance in his voice. The old man chuckled deeply.

“Well, that wouldn't have been any fun, would it? The legend would take a bit of a hit if you could just meet me anywhere.”

 

“...I suppose you're right...” the Nohrian girl whispered, feeling her body begin to shake with fury. “Except no, I fucking don't! That's stupid!! That was _your_ doing, wasn't it, all of it! You put me through that hell when I could've just walked through a door!? Is that how you get your jollies, you sick son of a bitch!?”

“Nerrida!” Ryouma scolded her sharply. “Show some respect.”

 

“Shut your fucking face, Ryouma, before I shut it for you! _You_ walked through a _door_ \- _I_ had to wade through a lake of blood to smash my way out of there!!” Everyone stared at her, their eyes wide, some with fear, some concern, _all_ judging her, clearly thinking she was off her rocker. Silas, caring soul that he was, tried to speak to her in the way someone would placate a simple child.

“Nerr... are you _sure_ that's what happened? That wasn't maybe a... nightmare you had?” A hundred, thousand things ran through her mind at those words, most of them threats, but the supposed Rainbow Sage spoke up before she could voice any of them.

 

“A nightmarish experience it may have been, but that does not make it any less real.”

“What are you talking about?” Takumi demanded, crossing his arms over his chest as he scowled at the old man. The sage sighed slightly, closing his eyes.

“Those who wish to be blessed with my power must first pass a trial. That trial differs based on the person being tested. You all were not the ones who were seeking my gift, so you did not need to be tried. You, however, my child... your tribulations are many indeed. The Sanctuary is a place that is shaped by one's psyche, and yours has tested you harshly.” So... all the horrors, all the guilt and sorrow heaped upon her... they had just been a test. Her greatest fears used against her. That wasn't cruel at all.

“Well. I'm here before you and I'm not a blubbering, psychotic mess, so I assume I passed. I'll take my blessing and be on my way, thank you.”

 

“No.” For a moment, Nerr thought she had misheard. She must have.

“ _Excuse me?_ ”

“I said no.” Even the others seemed indignant at his answer.

“What do you mean, no? She did everything you asked her!” Felicia shouted.

“We didn't backtrack all the way here just to be told 'no'!” Hinoka was even angrier, her eyes flashing. In stark contrast, the Nohrian princess did not react at all, her expression never changing. Her voice was even, flat, when she spoke finally.

“...why?”

 

“Because there is little I can do for you that you have not done for yourself already. You've come so far, fought so hard... Countless people have perished simply trying to scale the mountain, even more met their ends within the Sanctuary... Your journey itself has strengthened you, mind, body and soul. Why, if I were to ask you to climb another five thousand vertical feet, I have no doubt you'd do it. _That_ is the strength the others have tapped into.” The princess stared down at the old man, not speaking, not breathing.

 

Without a word, she turned and walked towards the door, opening it just enough to slip out and slamming it behind her so hard that it bounced open. She'd half expected to find herself back in the bloody room, but no; she was out in the town. It no longer seemed desolate. Though it was late, there were still a few people milling about, fisherman carrying their nets, women holding baskets of produce in one hand and a child in the other. Lights were on in the windows, warm golden glows that made the houses look inviting. Nerr continued walking, following the sound of waves, ignoring the people calling out for her to stop. Azura managed to reach her first, grabbing her wrist and tugging on it to keep her from going any further.

 

“Nerr, stop it! Wait!” She pulled her arm away and kept walking, stopping only when something solid blocked her path. The Rainbow Sage Stood before her. Hunched over from age, the top of his head barely came to her chin. He chuckled slightly, the sound filling her ears like ground glass.

“Hoo hoo hoo, you're a quick little dragon, aren't you? But you shouldn't be so quick to end a conversation. After all, you never--”

“...you're wrong, old man.” He blinked, bemused by her apparent non-sequitur. From so close, she could see that his eyes were red, just like hers, right down to the slitted pupils.

“Excuse me?”

 

“I wouldn't walk another _foot_ if you told me to. 'The journey is the reward'- fuck that, and fuck you, too! Xander didn't get strong by going for a hike, you miserable old bastard! You're bullshitting me, and I don't much appreciate it. Now get the hell out of my way before I pick up where age left off and _kill you_.” She seethed at him, no longer able to contain her fury. To her disgust and outrage, the man did not move an inch, merely laughing quietly to himself.

“Hoo hoo hoo... so angry... You should learn to relax, my child; all that anger will put you in an early grave.” His expression grew more serious, his eyes darker as they met with hers. “Do you truly not feel stronger, more resolute than before? You pushed through your fears and doubts when you could have given up and succumbed to them; surely now you feel as though you could do anything you set your mind to?” The expectation in his voice, the assurance there, made her even angrier.

“NO!!! I feel exactly the same as I did before, only _worse!_ Now, on top of the fear and doubt, I'm filled with disappointment and rage! Don't you _dare_ act like you did me a favor, you monster- all you did was waste my time and make everything worse!” By that time, the others had caught up with her, Ryouma and Azura at the helm. The high prince approached them, bowing deeply to the sage.

 

“Please, forgive my rude sister, Rainbow Sage- she's exhausted and frustrated and means not what she says...!”

“I have no doubt she means _precisely_ what she says, Prince Ryouma...” His eyes were different when he looked back at her, darker... sadder. “Perhaps you are right, O Uncertain Hero; perhaps something as ephemeral as mental fortitude is not sufficient enough a reward for so trying an ordeal. There is one more thing I can do for you, my child. Nerrida, show me the blessed Yatogami, if you will.”

 

“I _won't_.” She said staunchly, crossing her arms over her chest. “I'm through with you and the lies about your blessing. I'm through with all of this. I'm leaving, I don't care if I have to _swim_ back to the mainland, as long as I get away from you.” She deftly stepped around the sage, her steps heavier in her rage. She could see the docks straight ahead, the salty, fresh air of the ocean reaching it's tendrils towards her.

“You would turn your back on your fate so easily? Cast aside your destiny?” It should've been easy to ignore, but those words seemed to erect a massive wall in front of her, blocking her from her escape route. Breathing sharply through tightly clenched teeth, Nerr rounded on the sage, who was just standing there, looking innocuous.

 

“...'destiny'...? _Destiny_ is a fucking _fairy tale!_ _Fate_ is a cruel construct used to explain away tragedy! Who decided the fate of those who are senselessly murdered? What gods blessed the souls of those who would be retarded and crippled? Should those who wallow in excess and depravity give the same thanks as children who are beaten and raped and left for dead because some higher power willed it to be so?! If someone has planned my entire existence out for me already, then _what the hell is my purpose for being here?!_ ” She shrieked, not caring that people were opening their doors and windows to better stare at her. She could feel a warmth at her hip and glanced down, her gaze hardening as it settled on the pronged pommel of the Yato. This was all because of _**it**_... ever since it had first been uncovered, no one could shut up about her being “The Chosen One”... She unsheathed it violently, her hand shaking as she glared at the dull, brass blade.

 

“Wretched thing...” She hissed, drawing it back as far as she could before hurling it towards the docks. The others cried out in shock and dismay as the blade turned over and over, heading straight for the ocean. Nerr herself smiled widely. Now, someone _else_ could be “The Chosen One”. Now, no one needed to expect _anything_ of her anymore.

 

Just as the blade was beginning to arc downward, it stopped. It did not catch in something or bounce off anything, it just... stopped. In mid air. It began hurtling again, only this time, returning in the direction it had been cast from. It spun so quickly it appeared as a solid golden wheel, a pinwheel of death. It was coming straight for her, a dog turning on it's master after having been left by the roadside. The Nohrian girl threw her hands over her face, not wanting to bear witness as it cleaved her in twain. Just as it had back in the ruined town square of Shirasagi, the ribbed grip brushed against her hand, as if someone were handing it to her gently. Slowly, she opened her eyes.

 

The air around the blade shimmered, just as it had the first time this happened, the first time it had _chosen_ her. With a feeling of utter defeat, Nerr closed her fingers around the hilt, the weight and warmth of the sword familiar if nothing else. And it certainly was nothing else. There was no sense of comfort, no security, not even a slight ease that usually came from having a sword in her hand. She felt as if her troubles had just quadrupled. Suddenly, her legs gave out, leaving her in a heap on the cold, stone ground. The others rushed forward in concern, now that there was no spinning sword waiting to decapitate them, but Nerr could barely hear them over the pain building behind her eyes. It hurt- everything, even thinking, hurt. Ryouma's voice came to her, faint and distorted through her haze.

 

“If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes, I wouldn't have believed it.”

“This is the second time...”

“I guess those old legends know what they're talking about, huh?” The Rainbow Sage said something, but she wasn't listening, her attention focused directly on the sword. It was just a hunk of metal... it couldn't be sentient, it couldn't have _chosen_ her... and even if it did, did she really get no say in the matter?

 

“Huh? What do you want with me?” Takumi was giving the old man an uneasy look.

“I would tell you two to hold your weapons aloft, but I can see that has very little chance of happening. Oh well, it was mostly for dramatic effect, anyway. But what I _need_ you to do is look at one another with calm minds and open hearts.” Nerr's whole body felt as though it were made of lead. She couldn't have gotten back to her feet if she wanted to. Which she didn't. Rather than raise a fuss like she expected him to, her blood brother knelt down in front of her. From the way he fidgeted to the way he could barely hold her gaze, it seemed that everything about the situation was making him uncomfortable. The Nohrian girl's gaze did not waver, cold and hard. She just wanted whatever was going on to be _over_ so they could leave. The sage frowned down at them.

 

 _“Someone's_ heart is not open...” Just as she was about to tell him that the only open part of her was much lower down and he was welcome to kiss it, Takumi jumped back to his feet.

“I can't help it! Look at her!” He pointed down to his sister. “She hates me!”

“I don't hate you.” Nerr responded quietly, and honestly. After all, it wasn't _hatred_ that she felt towards the Hoshidans... “I just wish I'd never met you. Any of you. I'd be happy if I had never so much as _seen_ an actual Hoshidan in my life.” She closed her eyes, letting her head fall forward until her chin resting against her breastplate. She could hear the Sage's disappointment in his voice.

 

“The Seal of Flames must be unlocked to initiate peace- that cannot happen while your heart remains closed.”

“Then you've got a problem. Talk to _them_ ,” She jabbed a thumb in the general direction of the other royals. “Peace is what they're fighting for. Right? Peace for Hoshido?” Sighing deeply, Nerr got to her feet, still feeling a bit unsteady. The old man's eyes seemed to pierce through her.

 

“And what do _you_ fight for? Hmm? You came here seeking power for _some_ reason, after all. Do you fight to return to those days from long ago? Do you fight for the good of your people, to be a hero to them?” Did he ask King Garon that, she wondered? If so, then he clearly didn't care what the answer was, so long as there was an answer. A long time ago, she would've said “yes”, and even then, she would've been lying. She recalled the voices back in the Sanctuary, voices that apparently were all in her head. What was she fighting to do? _Whatever you want- that's all you EVER do..._

 

“...no. I fight because it's the only thing that makes me feel alive. It's the only satisfaction I can get.” Vengeance was fine and well, but when she was a perpetrator in the deaths of those she wanted to avenge, did it really carry the same weight? After all, they were dead- what did corpses care for justice? It wouldn't bring them back to life. It wouldn't return those lost days to her. She just wanted to make people suffer because it made _her_ feel better. She was every bit a monster as Hans. The Rainbow Sage heaved a deep sigh.

“Well... at least you're being honest with yourself. That's a step in the right direction, for we cannot address our problems until we acknowledge them; heaven knows the same held true for me. Lift your blade, Nerr...” She wanted to argue, but she was too tired even raise her voice. It seemed to take all the energy she had to hold the sword aloft. The Sage closed his eyes, raising his hands. It looked almost as though he were channeling a Dragon Vein, but she knew he was channeling his own power. When he opened his mouth to spoke, she recognized his words in the back of her head. They sounded foreign to her ears, the same strange language she had heard Lilith chant that terrible day back at the Infinite Chasm months ago, a tongue she did not know, yet understood.

 

“I, who forged the sacred blade... I, who committed the great sin... I, who wove the divine colors... I call upon you now, Seal of Flames!” Even as he spoke, the stones set within the Yato began glowing slightly. The entire sword glowed, the light it cast growing brighter and brighter. The patina and water spots that seemed embedded in the metal vanished before her eyes, leaving the dull brass color shining a pristine gold. Even the stones seemed brighter. Lowering it slightly, she looked down at the buffed blade- she could see her reflection in it, as though it were a mirror.

“How did you do that?” He chuckled slightly, sounding almost as tired as she felt.

“Oh, I have some tricks up my sleeve, yet. This, however, is just the beginning, not even the first step. I had hoped, since you have heroes among you, that I could help your sword evolve into it's next form, the Noble Yatogami, a blade strong enough to turn any shadows into the brightest day.” Ryouma, who had been listening with a grimly contemplative expression the whole time, suddenly perked up.

 

“That power could be what we need to stand up to Garon once and for all. Rainbow Sage, you _must_ give us that power!” The Sage shook head head, leaning heavier on his staff.

“It is not my power to give. It is a strength born when two hero's hearts beat as one. That day has not yet come, but...” He looked back to Nerr, his eyes softening slightly. “I have faith in you, little dragon. I believe that you can be better than you think you can. And remember this, Prince Ryouma- disturbing a chrysalis before it's time only causes harm, despite what our intentions may be.”

 

The Nohrian girl looked back down to her new sword (well, it was hardly new, but it certainly _looked_ new). It felt warmer in her hand, and such warmth should've been a comfort, but the sight of that pronged pommel sticking out from her gloved fist just turned her stomach. She replaced the Yato in it's scabbard, just so she wouldn't have to look at it any more. The Sage was still talking, his words almost going unnoticed by her.

 

“Now, if my sources are accurate, your comrades are awaiting your return in the Woods of the Forlorn, and a very confused army seems to be honing in on their position. I believe _now_ would be an opportune time to return to the mainland.” Sakura gasped quietly.

“Oh! I-I had almost forgotten about that e-entirely!” She began fumbling with her belongings, trying to find the warp tome Leo had give them. The old man laughed warmly.

“Hoo hoo, that's understandable, given all you've been through. I am certain greater challenges still lie ahead, but it would break this old heart of mine if any of you youngsters kicked the bucket before me. I'm afraid this worn out husk has little magic left, but I give you all my sincerest prayers that you have safe travels.”

 

“Thank you, Sage. We will make great use of your gift. When the war is over, hopefully we can return here once again.” The old man's expression faltered for a microsecond, a look of dismay. Nerr glanced at the others, to see if the saw it too, but it seemed they didn't. She frowned.

“What? What is it? Already thinking up another _trial?”_ To her surprise, the sage laughed.

“Hoo hoo hoo, such a funny little creature. You remind me a great deal of the knight that came to see me all those years ago- he was even angrier and more bad-tempered than you, but heaven knows it got a laugh out of me...” He sighed, looking almost content as he beamed up to the others. “You all would be welcome to visit me any time, you and your sullen, foul-mouthed sister as well, hoo hoo...”

 

For a moment, the Nohrian girl wondered if Ryouma had been bad mouthing her to sage unaware as they waited for her to complete her trial, but just as the thought formed in her mind, she knew that was not the case. If the foolish man knew so much about her, why couldn't he give her answers instead of just raising more questions and spawning more nightmares? The warmth of the sword on her hip only served to bring up more unpleasant quandaries. If every aspect of her life had been predetermined by fate, then did that mean her apathetic complacence was meant to be? If she didn't control her destiny, did she _really_ have to try to do anything at all? After all, whatever was meant to be would be, regardless of any outside influence, so didn't that mean she was free not to care? That would've been wonderful, for in that moment, all Nerr cared about was getting back to Nohr proper and finding somewhere to sleep, and, if fate willed it, not wake up again.

000

 

A/N- DAYUM, SON! This chapter is _long_. I didn't want it to be so long, but it got away from me. Sometimes, when I start typing my Author's Appeal, I find it hard to stop. So, again, I'm getting _SOOOO_ bored with the actual in-game chapter win conditions (and with the actual in-game chapters as well). Also, in Conquest, the Rainbow Sage says that everyone's trial is different based on the person facing it. The game's trial worked out fine in 'The Rising Dark' because at that point, the thing that was giving Nerr the most grief and turmoil was fighting people she didn't want to fight (namely, her Hoshidan siblings). Well, I can't imagine she'd really give two fucks about stabbing some holograms (it would probably be cathartic), so that wouldn't have the same effect in 'The Falling Light'- her biggest problems in this route are her guilt for siding with Hoshido and desire to be, yet fear of being, alone. So I decided to look to other video games for inspiration for this “trial”, specifically of the horror genre. I've been wanting to do a “Journey to the Center of the Mind” type deal for a while now, and I think Nerr (and everyone else) being forced through a room of her own crazy is _way_ more fun to write than “They stabbed an illusion. Then they stabbed another one, and another one, and then they were all stronger than Garon.”

Another thing is, I really can't stand how _easy_ everything comes to everyone in “Birthright”. That game may as well be called “Fire Emblem Fates- Deus Ex Machina”, because that's what it is. You had to wait three chapters between meeting the Sage and getting a Yato upgrade in Conquest! I get that Birthright was designed for people who find Normal Casual an intense mental workout, but all that hand holding is integrated into the story and actively detracts from the story as a result. Conflict? What's that? Here's a bunch of super broken units that KO everything in their path and a sword with passive +Atk/+Spd buffs- have fun slaughtering everything, you peace loving kooks! If the game treated _both_ routes this way, I probably wouldn't have a problem with it- no, that's a lie; I'd just hate them both equally then, but that's better than hating one and being disappointed in the other. But instead, Fates pulls an “Undertale” dick move on us- giving us the “GOOD/ Pacifist” way to play (siding with Hoshido) and the “BAD/ Genocide” way to play (siding with Nohr). Whenever _anything,_ be it video games, literature, or movies, tells me “These are the good guys- root for them, not the bad guys over here!”, I usually end up liking the “bad guys” more just out of spite (I think you can infer which version of Undertale I like better...). I honestly prefer stories where _everyone_ is a dick, compared to Disneyifed good versus evil. Don't give me a “choice” while screaming “THIS IS THE SIDE YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO CHOOSE!!”


	17. Into The Flood

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Ch.17- “Into The Flood”

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With the help of the warp tome, the journey back to the Wood of the Forlorn was blissfully short. This time around, perhaps because they had already endured it once before, it did not leave them incapacitated with nausea. Which wasn't to say there wasn't a great deal of gagging and retching as they landed back on the boggy ground, but it ended mercifully quick. Still, even though Nerr had spat out that last mouthful of watery bile a while ago, she continued dry heaving. It wasn't so much from the sensation of being de-and-reconstituted that came from teleportation. Even though her clothes were dry, she could still feel the sensation of stagnant water soaking into them, could still feel the sharps roots of teeth digging into her soles with every step she took, the smell of blood... the gut-wrenching guilt. So, that trial had all been in her head.

 

A small part of her wondered what form the trials of the others, Xander and Emperor Sumeragi and everyone else who had passed through that eldritch hell hole, had been like. It was hard to imagine a man like Garon feeling guilty for anything. An even bigger part of her wondered what the others thought of her, now that they'd had a glimpse into her supposed psyche. It was a small blessing that they had not been there to see that bloody chamber; she did not need any more stares. As it was, she could already feel Ryouma's dark eyes burrowing holes into her skull, even as he spoke with Scarlet and his retainers. He was disappointed in her, disappointed that she'd had the opportunity to get her hands on a shiny new murder toy that would allow them to break Garon's hold on them once and for all, but had passed it up because of her selfishness. Well, he was more than welcome to go take his own trial, but he would have to head back to Notre Sagesse on foot. A few moments after they had returned to the dismal bog, the few remaining pages in the warp tome had burnt away, the ash remaining crumbling out and falling to the ground, leaving only the empty husk of the cover. Azura frowned at the now useless remnants of the book.

 

“To think that, just like that, we're back already. Dark magic is as amazing as it is terrifying.”

“I'll say...” Takumi was adjusting his long hair, which had started coming loose. The tips were stained slightly with bile, and he avoided touching them. “A part of me wonders if all that stuff with the Rainbow Sage actually happened, or was it all just some kind of terrible, fever nightmare...” The sidelong glance he shot Nerr did not go unnoticed by the Nohrian princess, but she mindfully ignored him. Ryouma adjusted the straps of the armor on his face.

“It was no dream, brother. We now have greater strength, as well as the potential for more power that, hopefully, will be available to us in our time of need.” He shot Nerr a poignant look. Normally, she would've responded with a curse or a rude hand gesture, but now, she just stared back at him. Unblinking, unflinching, until he at last looked away. “I've never been more ready to take on King Garon.”

“Yeah!” Despite her sallow complexion, Hinoka's voice was brimming with determination. “We're not just fighting for ourselves and Hoshido; we're doing this for the good of _everyone_ \- if left to his own devices, Garon will continue bringing ruin upon everything in his path. Nobody else can stop him, so it has to fall to us. Nothing will stand in our way now, right, Nerrida?” It was nice that they were trying to include her in their pep talk.

 

“The royal army is looking for us. I'm going this way.” It seemed the others had forgotten the Rainbow Sage's warning that Nohrian soldiers were on their heels. Without Leo's illusory magic making everything look like a repeating loop, it was much easier to figure out where they were. They were currently in the small, makeshift camp the others had formed whilst she and the royals had been in Notre Sagesse. Behind them was where she had fought Leo, which meant Freesia was to the west. The remaining members of the Ice Tribe had probably told any passing soldiers exactly where they had gone (it wasn't as if they had a reason to help them any more), which meant north and east were the only directions left for them to go. Neither direction seemed to lead anywhere but straight into the jaws of death, so the Nohrian princess just began walking straight ahead. She had already disappeared into the tree line when Ryouma's voice rang out.

 

“Nerrida is right. There seems to be a route northwest of here that leads almost directly to the castle in Windmire. And remember... we may have evaded Nohr's forces for now, but we can't let our guard down. Even for a moment.”

000

 

Finally making their way out of the dreary woods and back into the open air was almost surreal. The temperature seemed to drop sharply as they trudged into the thick snow. Notre Sagesse had been far south enough to still be free of snow, and due to the thick canopy of the Woods of the Forlorn, no snow could reach the swampy ground. Usually, there would be paths in such a place, but the thick white blanket covered any landmarks. Silas and Jakob seemed to know the area well enough, and they quickly pointed the group in the right direction. With the stars and moon shining so brightly overhead, any soldiers would have an easy time spotting them. There was no silence as they walked, though. Everyone seemed to be whispering to one another, carrying on conversations. Dragging herself at a snail's pace behind the others, the sound of quiet chattering seemed to melt into a low, hollow hiss that slowly carved itself into her brain, like a river carving out a canyon.

 

They were finally back on the road to Windmire, and when they got there, they would kill Garon. After all, there was no brokering peace with a madman. Nerr would help them with that, and she would kill Hans like she had promised him and then, she'd finally feel a little better. What happened afterwards was Xander and Ryouma's problem. There would probably be more war- Nohr wouldn't take the murder of their ruler kindly. The war would continue, and everything would be as it always had been. Snow crunched in front of her, a large shadow looming over her. Silas, back atop his steed, had stopped in front of her.

 

“That must be pretty cold in bare feet. Hop on, you can ride with me.” Nerr looked up at him, silently contemplating his offer. She walked around the sorrel destrier.

“No, thanks.” She continued walking, her slow, trudging gait. The silver-haired cavalier was still keeping her pace.

“You sure? There's room...”

“Yes. I'm sure.” They lapsed into silence, before the boy sighed deeply.

 

“...is this about what happened back in the Sevenfold Sanctuary?” He asked quietly, perhaps not wanting anyone else to eavesdrop. Not that it mattered- at least half of their numbers had been there with them. They had seen how disturbing a place it was. He was still talking. “I mean-- okay, I know that place wasn't normally creepy like that and that it was because of _you specifically_ is a little messed up, but... it was just a test. Like our endurance training. ...set in a haunted house... designed just for you... You shouldn't feel weird or bad just because everyone got a glimpse into your fears; I'm scared of creepy, dark hallways, too.”

 

“...I _don't_.” Weird and bad were the last things she was feeling at the moment. It was more a... detached sensation. As though she were walking around with a terrible cold that left her in a daze. Plavo stopped, and there was a rattle of armor as his rider jumped down from the saddle. Leading the horse by the reins, Silas walked closer to his old friend.

“Then what is it?” It was many, many things, a great deal of things, a whirlpool of things spun up inside her head. Nerr settled on the thought nearest the surface of her mind.

“...how long do you think the pain of death lasts? I suppose it depends on how you die... People seem to die fairly quickly when you stab them, but I know that it's possible to stab someone and miss anything vital- they die slowly, then. If your neck snaps, you're supposed to die then and there, but nothing is a given, so it may even be possible to survive _that_ for a good, long while... I bet the pain lasted a long time with Flora... she was screaming for so long... it looked so painful...”

 

“Nerr.” She felt a pair of hands on her shoulders, pushing her back enough to stop her. Silas had moved in front of her, his silvery eyes dark with worry. “...you've gotta stop thinking about things like this. I know it was horrible; I-- I didn't even _know_ Flora, and those screams are going to haunt me until my dying day, but... dwelling on these things won't make the pain stop. It's like I've been telling Felicia; focus on the good memories, not the bad ones.” Nerr hadn't known he was talking to Felicia, but it shouldn't have come as a surprise- Silas' goal seemed to be becoming everyone's best friend.

“Good memories...” Smiling, laughing, teasing... Warmth and joy... things that were gone now. Things that wouldn't come back. Silas smiled slightly, encouraged by the fact that she seemed to be buying into his advice.

“That's right. I know things seems bad now-- well, things seem pretty damn _terrible_ now, but they won't be like this forever. We have to focus on the good things in life, the things worth living for; the things worth _fighting_ for...” ...Nerr was fighting to get her hands around Hans' thick neck.

 

“That's _exactly_ what I'm focusing on...” The knight's smile faltered slightly.

“Um... i-it's great that you're thinking happy thoughts, but, uh... m-maybe tell that to your face...” His words made no sense to her- perhaps that had been a joke, but he wasn't laughing. He tried to perk his grin up again. “C'mon, where's that smile I know so well? I know you have hopes, dreams, things you want to do when the war is over. Talk to your old buddy, Silas.”

 

When the war was over... Nerr had never been raised to think about _after_ the war- her only goal in life had been to _fight_ it, not plan for “after”. Xander told her that their father would arrange a political marriage for her one day, but the thought of falling on the battlefield, in glorious service to her country, sounded better than that. She'd held onto a pipe dream once, a beautiful fantasy she could retreat into to make herself smile, but that had gone up in flames, or rather... had fallen deep, deep down into the dark abyss.

 

“I was supposed to do my duty and help conquer Hoshido.”

“Well... I was too, but I meant _after_ that.”

“I've never thought that far ahead.” She reached up, removing Silas' hands from her shoulders and setting them back at his sides before stepping around him and continuing on her way. The long-term future never meshed well with Nerr's plans. She could see and plan for short term things just fine, but five, ten years from now? It was as if those pages in the book of her life were blank, without even the barest outline of a plot given. But if the Rainbow Sage was to be believed, she had no say in how her life would turn out anyway, so whatever was meant to happen would happen eventually.

000

 

The deep purple night sky had a few wisps of aquamarine near the horizon, indicating that it was well into the morning. They had been walking for hours, and snow had begun falling once more, obscuring the way forward more profoundly. While there seemed to be no natural landmarks, the man made ones stood out clearly. A massive fortress loomed before them, dark and intimidating, like a scaled-down version of Castle Krakenburg itself. Even with snow dusting it's ramparts like powdered sugar, it looked no less overbearing. The way the portcullis and spires were situated almost likened it to the visage of a dragon sleeping with it's mouth wide open. The areas at the sides were full of scrub brush and thistles, all covered in snow as well. Takumi whistled lowly, craning his head back to better see.

 

“That's some fort. I gotta give it to the Nohrians; they know how to make intimidating structures... Is this really our destination?” Ryouma nodded sagely. He had been speaking to Scarlet the whole time in hushed tones, but given the grave look on his face, it was doubtful they had been lover's whispers.

“Yes. This is the fastest way to get to Windmire. And if we encounter resistance, the enclosed space will actually favor us; we can't be surrounded by a large army in there.” Nerr, who had barely been listening to anyone, too caught up in the imagery of her old story books, chuckled humorlessly.

“That was a joke? Of course they can. In fact, they probably _would_ \- that's basic strategy. One squad will block our exit while another will come in behind us, driving us forward.” Silas nodded grimly.

 

“It's an opportune time to hit us with a pincer maneuver, and it doesn't look like there's any windows we could make a quick escape through if they caught us in there. Unless your contingency plan in such an event is something better than 'hide in a corner', we might need to come up with a plan B.” Nerr looked back out over the snow covered wasteland sandwiched between the fort and the barren forest.

“We could go around. Hinoka, Tsubaki, Scarlet and Yuugiri could ferry us across the scrub.” Scarlet frowned at her suggestion.

“What if there are archers lying in wait in the woods?”

“...so you think they'd only initiate a fight if you make eye contact with them?” The high prince shook his head, snow falling from the wild, brunette locks.

 

“No. We need to make use of cover when it's provided. Even if the Nohrian army tries to block us in, we'd have a better chance funneling their attacks through small openings than taking them all on out in the open.” Surprisingly, Azura stepped up to her brother, her ever present frown more pronounced.

“...I think we should listen to Nerr, Ryouma. This fort... something about it doesn't feel right...” She looked up at it's spires, which seemed to brush the sky, and shuddered deeply. Scarlet grinned at her.

“Aw, don't freak out. That's probably just ghosts you're feeling; all burial grounds have 'em.” Sakura whimpered slightly, stepping closer to Hinoka.

“G-g-g-ghost...? B-b-burial ground...?! N-not another one!” Jakob nodded, giving the structure a cursory glance, his jaw set tight.

 

“Indeed. The fort itself was constructed partially from the remains of an ancient dragon, hence it's name, 'Fort Dragonfall'.” The blonde rebel linked her hands behind her head, grinning up at it.

“Yep. Legend goes, this was where Samaeor, the dragon who ruled Nohr back in the ancient days, fell. It's bones and carcass never seemed to deteriorate completely, even after centuries, so someone got it in their head to incorporate them into this fort. Pretty cool, huh?”

 

“...no. Not at all.” Nerr whispered coldly, her fingers curling into tight fists as she looked back to the fortress. This was the final resting place of the Dusk Dragon they revered? Well... not the Hoshidans, but... She remembered her siblings telling her about the festivals and holy processions they were required to attend, to honor the ancient god who's blood flowed through her veins. ...not _her_ veins, but even so, her eyes burned as she gazed upon the structure. The longer she looked, the more she could make out, remnants of blackened, broken fangs, places where the stone had fallen away like shed scales... It felt like she was standing before the tombstone of a parent. Thinking back on it, she remembered seeing that awful wyrmslayer for the first time, the thick hide stretched over the handle, the yellowed teeth that served as it's hilt... When she died, would they plunder her corpse for useful tools as well? Certainly, her horns would make decent spear tips. Azura seemed to cotton on to what was bothering her so much.

 

“That's enough, Scarlet. You're being disrespectful. Considering that _you're_ Nohrian, one would think you'd show a bit more reverence to the god that shaped your country.” To her credit, the Chevois woman had the decency to look ashamed.

“Yeah... Sorry about that- guess comments like that are pretty insensitive to someone who _is_ a dragon...”

“We should all tread lightly.” Ryouma said, his voice quiet. “It appears unguarded, but the gods- regardless of who's gods they are- should be treated with respect.” It surprised her that he actually seemed to care, but then she realized that he probably just didn't want to offend the Nohrian members of their party. Regardless of his reasons, it made her feel a little better to know that no one was going to start desecrating the grave out of contempt. Still... even though there were no soldiers in sight, the Nohrian princess knew enough by now to expect anything to go right. Sighing deeply, she unsheathed the Yato, the luster of it's blade almost blinding.

 

“You should all know by now that _something_ bad is probably waiting for us, so... perhaps everyone should say a preemptive prayer to whatever higher power they believe in.” They slowly made their way inside, Nerr and Ryouma at the forefront. There were walls erected inside, many of them crumbling in places, giving the impression of a maze. The floor was uneven, dipping and rising at random, allowing for small lakes where sickly, yellow water had gathered. There were large cracks in the ceiling where rain had probably gotten in, but for some reason, that didn't seem to be the source of the puddles. After all, she was very well acquainted with the smell of stagnant water, and that it did not smell like.

 

The air within, stale and strangely sour, was eerily silent. Despite the fact that it _seemed_ abandoned, all the many torches in their sconces were lit, casting the interior of the fort in bright light. _Too_ bright, considering it was not guarded. Approaching the nearest wall, the Nohrian princess took a moment to close her eyes an listen, trying to hone in on the sound of whispering, or footsteps, or even just breathing. The only breathing she heard was of those coming in behind her. Parts of the wall curved strangely, the stone smooth, yet strangely porous. It took a moment for her to realize those were _bones_. She inhaled sharply through her nose, the smell of oil and smoke burning her eyes.

 

“...I already don't trust this. Everything is lit as if people were just here recently.” Silas pulled up beside her. Atop his steed, he had a better viewpoint.

“I agree; it isn't like the Nohrian army to leave a major facility abandoned, especially one that leads straight to the capital.”

“We've been having bad luck with things that seem 'abandoned'...” Nerr muttered darkly. The castle in Izumo, the forest in Mokushuu, Chevalier, Mount Crninoćnivuk... every time they had come across something that seemed abandoned, there had been so much death in the end... Ryouma scanned the immediate area.

 

“You're right. I'd rather have discovered even a few sentries. This doesn't feel right...” His gaze dropped down to the nearest puddle, his lips curling down in disgust. “And that water... Good lord, is _all_ Nohrian water disgusting?” The source of that strange, sour smell that had been niggling at the back of her mind suddenly hit her.

“ _This_ is not Nohrian water- it smells like _vomit_...” Nerr had smelled that enough times to be intimately familiar with it as well. But that made no sense either; there was simply too much for it to have been expelled by a few people, and it didn't smell like or seem to contain any food. It was like pure bile... Before she could pose her thoughts aloud, the ground at their feet rumbled without sense or reason. Had Plavo not been there for her to catch herself, she might well have fallen into the suspect puddle.

“What the hell is that?!” Ryouma's arm's were spread wide to try and retain his balance better.

 

“I don't know! It could've been an earthquake...”

“We don't get earthquakes in this area!” Silas protested, trying to calm his panicking steed. From further back, Hinoka's voice called out.

“Whatever it is, we need to evacuate! The last thing we want is to be trapped in here during a cave-in!” Walking was difficult when the ground had a mind of it's own, but they made their way back towards the entrance, only to find it blocked by a crowd of fearful Hoshidans. Ryouma pushed his way forward. Nerr could barely pay attention to him when she was trying to keep from falling. Dust and small stones were knocked loose from the ceiling, falling onto their heads. Whatever the holdup was could surely not be more pressing than the threat of larger rubble.

 

“What!? How is this even possible!?” The high prince's voice was torn between anger and fear. Nerr began weaving between those standing between her and the exit as well.

“What is it; why aren't you moving? We need to get out of here!”

“We _can't!”_ Azura sounded even more fearful, and she soon realized why. Where the entrance had been only moments ago now stood a very solid looking wall. Only, it did not appear as a slab of brick laid neatly; large stones interlocked tightly, like stalactites and stalagmites forming in an alternating pattern, or...

 

“Teeth...” She muttered. There were muffled voices on the other side of the “wall”- it seemed to have closed before everyone could get in, which was a small blessing. Only fitting that a dragon would have teeth, but for the mouth of an ancient corpse to close on it's own? No... The princess shook her head. She'd had enough of random bullshit like this back in Notre Sagesse; she would not allow it to get the better of her now. “It's probably just an illusion. We've seen this kind of thing one too many times before. It's just throwing us off- the exit is around here somewhere...” She had just reached out, running her hands over the teeth (they felt very real, but then, so did everything in the Sevenfold Sanctuary) to try and find where the entrance truly was when a smarmy voice rang unpleasantly in her ear.

 

“Heheheheh... This is no illusion, Nerr...” Nerr rolled her eyes out of instinct alone.

“Oh no... not you again...” There was a flash of light behind her, and she reluctantly turned just in time to see Iago appear a few yards away from them, the runes around him fading but leaving an afterimage. He stood in the sickly puddle, so she knew they were facing another illusion- something like him wouldn't risk sullying his delicate form, but even so, she approached him, just to better grate his nerves. He pouted in a taunting manner.

“Well, it sounds like I've lost the element of surprise... I was hoping you'd jump, at least.”

 

“Don't you have anything _better_ to do, you nasty little man? Kick a puppy, plan a coup, put on your mommy's smallclothes and sexually gratify yourself; _anything_ other than trying to get a rise out of me.” Even incorporeal as he was, she could still see the royal advisor's face turn a splotchy purple as he grew irate, his lips twisting in disgust.

“Ugh... you disgusting little whore... When I had first thought up this plan to rid us of your loathsome existence, I thought, 'perhaps it's a bit too much', but now I see that it's hardly enough. You are a boil on the ass of humanity that needs to be lanced.”

“A word of advice, Iago; when you're talking to me, don't interrupt your silly speeches with insults aimed at yourself.” The sorcerer's pallid face grew brighter and brighter in his anger. Before the encounter could devolve into more childish insults, Ryouma stepped forward, his countenance hard.

 

“What's your master plan this time, dastard? Destroy the fort on top of us? Surely even _you_ are aware that it's an indestructible dragon.” Faced with someone who at least took him seriously, Iago laughed contemptuously.

“Well, of course I am! Why else do you think I chose this location to corner you- it's more indestructible than you can imagine... You Hoshidans are so prideful, yet so ignorant in the ways of the world; that's not a good combination, especially for an emperor. Well... at least you won't be ruling for long... if at all!” Even as he spoke, the smell of bile seemed to be getting stronger. The puddles were growing larger as well, but it seemed Ryouma had not yet realized that, too distracted by the intended blow to his honor to notice the dangers around him.

 

“What are you talking about, you miserable freak?”

“If you had listened to your savage little sister, you could've avoided all this. Stupid traitor she may be, the silly bitch has a nose for sniffing out traps. But I knew you wouldn't- I know you byaks value seniority and gender over actual skill and intellect. Any idiot, no matter how unqualified, is desired to lead, and look where it's gotten you, you idiot.” By that time, the bile had reached higher ground. Nerr had been standing closest to it, and the foul liquid lapped at her toes. For a moment, it seemed to tingle slightly, almost the way it felt when her feet fell asleep... then, the burning came. Sharp and deep and intolerable, as if she had just stuck her foot into a bed of red-hot cinders. Yelping in pain, she jumped back, reaching down and trying to brush the remaining moisture from her bare skin.

 

“Augh! It _burns!!_ ” She could see tiny blisters popping up on the reddened skin of her left foot- the dark navy hide of the right one just darkened. Iago laughed, pure delight in his voice as he cackled.

“Yes, Princess Byak-sama; acid will do that to you. Dragons can digest anything, you know. Bone, hooves... I'm sure flesh must melt like butter.” Azura's voice broke slightly.

“Th--there must be some kind of Dragon Vein that's he's using-- Ugh!! The walls are turning slimy!!” A quick glance up revealed that the stone around them seemed slick, and also appeared to be undulating slightly. Sakura clutched her festal tightly, her small chest rising and falling rapidly.

“I-I-I-I don't think th-th-this is an illusion, n-nee-sama...”

 

“Oh, it's real- just ask you little friend's toes how real. Compliments of King Garon, of course. He has access to the most deliciously unpleasant spells, and given that we're now engaged in total war against you savages, I'm free to throw anything at you that strikes my fancy.”

“We should have known a weak, ugly little coward like you wasn't smart enough to do this on your own.” The singer's voice dripped with contempt, but Iago simply grinned wider.

“Oooh, the blunette one is being _mean_ to me! I'm quivering in my smallclothes. But I can be gracious enough to ignore so mild an insult... since you're about to _die_ and all...”

 

The stomach acid was continuing to rise, causing Nerr to back further into the others. She bumped into Scarlet, or more specifically, her heel bumped into the head of the rebel's ax. She was suddenly reminded of the final room she'd been trapped in back in Notre Sagesse. She grabbed the ax from the other woman, pushed past the others to get to one of the walls. It was lighter now, and she could see very faintly what appeared to be blood vessels snaking across it's surface. It writhed slightly, and if she listened closely, she could almost make out a faint whooshing sound coming from the wall, like blood being pumped through it.

 

“To hell with this. Dragons slice up just the same as everything else!” She felt terrible, desecrating one of her ancestors, but she was certain they wouldn't have wanted to unwittingly devour their descendants. Raising the ax high, she brought it down with all her might, expecting the heavy steel blade to sink into the flesh, perhaps for blood to pour out. What she didn't expect was _nothing_ to happen. The blade bounced off the seemingly soft flesh, leaving nor so much as a nick. She'd have done more damage to actual stone. Behind her, Iago laughed even louder.

“Oh, sweet, foolish Nerr... Did you _really_ expect to be able to break through the ribcage of an elder dragon? _Really?_ And here I was, just saying you were almost smart... There's only _one_ way out of here, and I assure you, it isn't pleasant. Also, you'll die. In case that wasn't clear.”

“What do we do!?” Takumi asked the room at large, pressing his back further against the wall of teeth in an effort to get away from the ever rising lakes of bile.

 

“Sit back and enjoy being digested; it's all you _can_ do.” The Nohrian man said flippantly, before raising a finger to his chin in mock thought. “On second thought... If you're bored, I think I have some new _friends_ for you to play with. Enjoy...” The sorcerer clenched his fist around something and mimed the motion of slamming something down- the real Iago, back safely in Krakenburg, must've been holding a staff of some kind. A dark miasma swirling at their feet coalesced, slithering upwards and shaping itself into humanoid shapes. As it hardened into mottled green flesh, the air filled with the sound of roaring and panicked cries. Above the cacophony, Iago laughed. “I know, I know- I'm far too generous! These lovelies may end up sparing you a wonderfully delightful death via deliquescence, but either way, I'll be watching from a cozy chair back at the palace. Ah, ta-ta!” With a flash of magical light, the illusion vanished once more, leaving only the growling Faceless behind.

 

“Oh gods, we're doomed!” Hinoka moaned. Unsheathing his holy katana, Ryouma stepped forward.

“No today! We just need to deal with these monster- then we can figure out how to get out of here.” Holding the blade before him, he channeled it's magic into the nearest Faceless. A crack of lightning was quickly followed by the smell of burning flesh. As the beast convulsed, falling back into the acid, the resulting splash hit those nearest. The high prince cried out in agony as the tiny drops bore into his skin, but Nerr was more unnerved by the sight of the Faceless.

 

The bile bubbled vigorously, like a pot on a stove, and before her eyes, she could see layers of decaying flesh being eaten away, until all that was left was a few scraps of meat clinging to brownish bones. The other Faceless were steadily being digested as well, the yellow liquid streaked dark with the congealed blood, but it hardly stopped them from lumbering forward. Pushing her way forward as one charged at them, Nerr shoved Ryouma back before the huge, heavily scared knuckles could smash into his face, lifting Scarlet's ax and bringing it down on the beast's protruding belly. The ax was much heavier and more awkward a weapons than she was used to, but the weight of the steel head sent the monster before her staggering back as it's entrails slipped out of the gash in it's middle. But still, the Faceless pushed forward, pushing them all back, further against the wall of teeth. The small isle of dry land they stood on was quickly shrinking.

 

“We can't fight against these things if we can't even move! Oh, gods...” Nerr's mind was zig-zagging between which death would be less painful- being ripped apart limb from limb, or slowly dissolving. Both seemed unnecessarily gruesome.

“I can feel something further ahead.” Hinoka's voice sounded muffled by the people crushing her. “I think-- I think it's a Dragon Vein. It might stop this acid from rising.” Everyone cried out as the floor beneath them pitched forward slightly, knocking some of them down. Nerr caught herself as she fell, that being all that kept her from falling face first into the digestive juices, but she could feel the heat on her hands as the thick leather of her gloves began burning away. Even so, a tingle of power surged through her palms as they lay flat on the undulating floor. Quickly pushing herself back to her feet, she noticed the holes in her gloves.

“It's back further- there's no way in hell we can reach it! Even if it weren't for the acid, the Faceless will tear us apart!”

 

“Then we gotta push 'em back!” Scarlet pushed past her, grabbing her ax back and, with one last, terror-filled glance at the acid lapping at her sabatons, charged into the horde of monsters with a battle cry.

“She's right.” Takumi had shifted his Fuujin to his bow hand. “We can't just sit here and wait to be digested- one of us has to find that Dragon Vein!” He summoned an arrow, letting it loose. It hit one of the Faceless, their head exploding in a shower of putrid blood and bone fragments. Nerr grit her teeth, reaching into her bag and pulling out her dragonstone.

“Don't let those things crowd me.” She hissed before clenching the rune tightly. The cartilage of her ribs began crackling as it grew larger, tendons snapping like whips inside her as they were torn loose and found new positions to anchor themselves to her bones. The sensation of being broken apart like a cheap toy was exacerbated by the acid sizzling around her knuckles as she dropped to all fours. She could no longer see the vile color of what she was stepping in, but the smell was stronger and sharper than ever. Like boiling vinegar. It made her lightheaded, but there was no time to swoon.

 

Knocking past two faceless, the draconic princess galloped further into the fortress. A human, even a tall one like Ryouma, would've been bogged down, the acid reaching up to their waist in the deeper part, but her long spindly legs kept her belly just above it, though that did nothing for the splash back. A thick hide and even thicker scales protected her far better than linen and leather ever could, but even so, the acid was still doggedly eating at her, leaving large, raw wounds that bled profusely. Nerr could feel the Dragon Vein getting closer, the ground surging with power. She just had to reach it-- A deafening roar was all the warning she got as a large, lumbering shape plowed into her, knocking her back. She stumbled, knocked to her knees, the acid washing over her back. It seemed to seep into the gaps between her scales, quickly eating away at the thin membrane stretched between her wings. Crying out in pain, she floundered, trying to right herself. Another Faceless stood before her, this one larger and sturdier than the others, it seemed. It appeared to be crudely stitched together from several other abominations, the sewn flesh coming loose in places and peeling away. She could see where the acid had worn it's flesh thin, pulsating organs pushing against the weak skin like hernias, waiting to explode outwards.

 

The Vein she was looking for was just beyond the atrocious thing, but even though most of it's legs seemed to have been dissolved, leaving only thick, cracked bones in their place, it did not slow down, intent on ensuring she suffered the same fate as it. Growling low in her throat, Nerr charged at the Faceless, preparing to gore it with her antlers. Large, calloused and blistered hands wrapped around the sharp, curved horns, stopping her in her tracks. She had never come across any Faceless that could think ahead before- they always just blundered blindly towards the nearest living thing, swinging wildly.

 

The colossus roared in her face, it's fetid, rotten breath almost overpowering the stench of vomit before shoving her down into the bile. It burned her eyes, pouring into her mouth and scalding her throat. She couldn't breath. Her skin was burning, blisters popping and exposing the already raw flesh beneath, causing deeper burns. Suddenly, the Faceless relinquished it's hold on her, and she broke the surface, gasping for air and screaming in her mind. A gaping hole had been blown through the monster's middle, organs slipping out and catching on it's jagged ribs, but even _that_ did not stop it. It roared again, rounding on the new attacker. No sooner did it turn than it's head exploded in a chunky spray of offal. Takumi lowered his bow, gritting his teeth as his whole body convulsed in pain.

 

“I'll cover you, just go!” Too grateful at having a decent shot watching her back to care who it was, the Nohrian princess continued forward. Every step was agony- it felt like her feet had been burned to the bone, but she had to keep running. There, it was there, she'd finally reached it. Another mammoth Faceless lumbered out from behind another wall, but she paid it no mind, trusting Takumi would keep his word (if he didn't, he was going to be an aperitif to her antipasto). She didn't know how to channel Dragon Veins in her draconic form- she would have to revert back to a more familiar vessel. The thought of it sent a shiver of dread coursing down her spine, but she had no choice. Gritting her non-existent teeth, Nerr released her hold on her dragonstone, feeling herself grow smaller.

 

All at once, the pain increased a hundred, thousand fold. The sickly yellow water came up just below her breasts, and was liberally streaked with red, but she could still feel the tingle of power beneath her ruined feet. Closing her eyes, unable to stem the flow of tears leaking out of them, she raised her hand, the bile collected there running down her arm, into her sleeve. Intense power snaked it's way up her legs, coiling around her before collecting in her palm and exploding outward. For a moment, it seemed like nothing had happened, but then, the sound of sizzling stop. Blinking away her tears, she noticed that the water around her middle had stopped bubbling, no longer cooking her. Gradually, it lost it's sallow color, turning clear, though wisps of blood still streaked it.

 

The clean, pure water felt like an emollient on her ravaged flesh, and she moaned in relief, allowing her trembling legs to give. She submerged herself in the water, letting it soak into her clothes and cool her washing away what remained of the gastric juices clinging to her. The water seemed clear, though her vision was too blurry to see properly, and it was deep enough that she could remain submerged for a while. While Nerr had never had an opportunity to swim before, it came as natural as walking to her, and she kicked off, paddling back out to where she had come from. She could make out what seemed to be Takumi's legs, she recognized the doeskin fauld he wore, though the thick fur that trimmed it had fallen out in clumps. His baggy trousers were riddled with holes through which she could see large burns on his skinny shins. Popping her head out, his yelp of fear was half concealed by the water rushing from his ears.

 

“We need to get back to the others.” She gasped, the very act of moving her lips exacerbating the burns there.

“And you're gonna _swim_ there?”

“I have to.” Nerr rasped honestly. She could not see her face- the water was too agitated to show her reflection- but she could feel the burns around her nose and eyes and mouth that stung even worse when exposed to air. Not willing to argue the point any further, she took another gulp of air and ducked back under, barely making a splash. Unsheathing her sword just in case, she was certain she looked rather foolish, swimming in a few paltry feet of water, but her scalded body craved it's soothing, calming effect. A pair of large, decomposing legs walked in front of her, nearly stepping on her as they passed. She could see tendrils of flesh clinging to deep burns floating past, like macabre streamers. Pressing her lips tighter to ensure she didn't accidentally consume any of the repugnant flesh, she rose slowly from the water, the dripping of her clothes and hair almost inaudible.

 

Certainly, the massive beast before her didn't notice, otherwise it would've turned around. Grabbing the grip of the Yato in both hands, she brought it down on the Faceless' shoulder, feeling the blade cut through the plate of bone there easily. It cried out in agony, flailing it's massive arms to try and dislodge the blade, but Nerr would not let go, dragging it down, at an angle and severing the monster's spine. It hit the water with a large splash, but still writhed. Not content to take a chance and see if it would perish on it's own, she drove the golden blade into it's back again and again, tearing the flesh asunder. With one final shudder, the Faceless went still, it's foul blood staining the water around it black. Well, so much for her swim... Fortunately, it appeared that while the others, no longer impeded by the threat of digestion, managed to eliminate the other Faceless. Nerr, with Takumi behind her, came back to a mountain of deliquescing corpses. The royals and soldiers were breathing hard, their clothes bloody and in tatters. Hinoka, who was shaking gobbets of meat from her Amaterasu, noticed the younger royals first, splashing out to meet them.

 

“Oh! Thank goodness you're okay! I was about to head out there myself.” The prince scoffed slightly.

“Like I couldn't deal with a handful of Faceless on my own; it was nothing.”

“It doesn't look like it was nothing. You're covered in burns- both of you!” As her skin dried, the pain came back sharper than ever. Nerr groaned slightly, stumbling and catching herself against a wall. Her feet seemed covered in craters that oozed thick blood and pus, and she was certain the rest of her legs looked no better. The cloth scraped against her wounds, sending agony through her nerves.

“Ugh... uhn... we-- we have to get out of here... there has to be some-- some way out...” Ryouma sheathed his katana, running his hand along the slick, pulsating walls.

 

“Were it stone walls that imprisoned us, we could break free, but few weapons can kill gods- even dead ones.” Azura frowned thoughtfully.

“Stone walls... it _was_ stone. That horrible man said it was some kind of spell that turned it back to flesh.” The songstress closed her eyes, inhaling deeply. _“You are the ocean's gray waves, destined to seek life beyond the shore, just out of reach...”_ The sliver of stone set in her pendant began glowing, as the water at their feet lifted into the air, reflecting the light from her necklace onto the walls and casting the fort's interior in a gentle, cerulean glow. The floor shuddered violently, pitching them all forward, but she continued to sing. “ _Yet the waters ever change, flowing like time... The path is your to climb...”_ As she continued singing, a crackling sound, faint yet growing louder, seemed to come from the walls. Small sections seemed to drying out, like cracking and pulling apart slightly like over baked clay.

 

“Hey, over there!” Silas pointed to where a much larger portion of the wall seemed to have calcified, the ribs curling around it crumbling slightly as hairline cracks formed across them. He dismounted his steed, heading over to it and placing his hand against it for a moment before drawing his sword back and striking the wall with the pommel. Thin fissures spread out from the point of impact.

“Ah, we just need to make our own exit. I got'cha.” Scarlet hefted her ax up, wincing slightly, Large portions of her lower body armor seemed to have rusted badly, but it didn't stop her from dashing over beside Silas, who was still hammering at the wall, widening the cracks. When the blonde woman swung her ax, a large chunk of the wall was knocked loose. Bolstered by the prospect of an exit, the others rushed over, striking the way if they had weapons suitable for it, and pushing at the weakened stone with their bare hands if not. With a loud groan, nearly the entire section fell away, out into the snowy scrub outside.

 

“Everyone, get out, quickly! I don't know if the ancient dragons were regenerators, and I don't want to find out in here!” Ryouma ushered them all out, catching Azura as she stumbled forward. The smell of fresh air beckoned her, and Nerr trudged along, the snow cold air outside biting into her wet skin even as the nettles, still half covered in snow, dug into her feet like glass. Everything seemed to be spinning, and she found herself staggering backwards, only to have her wrist caught by a large, gauntleted hand. Blinking until the world came back into focus, she noticed silvery hair and dark indigo eyes.

 

“I've got you, milady.” The familiarity of Jakob's voice almost lulled her into forgetting the reality of the present situation. He no longer had any obligation to care about her.

“I... I'm fine... I don't need your-- um... help...” It was getting harder and harder to string her thoughts together, her head spinning as it was. The (former) steward's eyes darkened for a moment, with anger or sadness, she did not know, nor had time to figure out, because he had taken her other hand as well, gripping them both lightly, and led her further into the snow.

“You need _someone's_ help, milady, and it seems I'm the closest source available. Watch your step- there are brambles here.” She wanted to argue, to say she was fine on her own, but she was too tired, too cold, and in too much pain to open her mouth. Instead, she let him lead her back to the others, who were heading towards the back of the fort.

 

She prayed there would be some secluded, sheltered place where they could make camp, because she didn't feel like she could walk another step. Indeed, she couldn't, her heavy, aching legs once again giving out from under her and sending her collapsing face first in the snow. Voices were calling out above her, but her head was spinning and gripped in torment, everything was fuzzy. It felt like she was sinking, deeper and deeper into a lake with no bottom. A final, fleeting thought crossed her mind as consciousness slipped from her- since Iago had been watching their plight, all toasty and comfy back in the castle, did he know they had escaped as well? When would more soldiers be crawling over them like a swarm of ants? Hopefully, if not Ryouma, then _someone_ had the common sense to realize that they had only avoided the most recent threat, and were still far from safe.

000

 

A/N- -sigh- Am I the only one that feels like most of 'Birthright' is just filler and people making stupid decisions to stretch out the game so it's the same length as 'Conquest'? This chapter, and the next in-game are the biggest offenders in my opinion- 'Conquest' shows that it's a straight shot from Windmire to the Woods of the Forlorn. When Corrin was sent to deal with the Ice Tribe, _the_ y didn't have to take a boat and head down a river made of fire. Which brings me to my next contention against this game... It's just... _no_ , man! Just _**NO!**_ I brought this up waaay back in Mokushuu, but some of the things that happen are just SOOO implausible that my disbelief cannot be suspended. I _get_ wanting to make things cool, but there's a limit. A person turning into a dragon- sure, I can go with that. Magical music that controls water and exorcises demons? Okay, why not. But you are not going to wade through pools of hydrochloric acid (in case you forgot what the main component of digestive juices _was_ ) and only suffer the loss of a few hit points. Just for shits and giggles, go look up some photographs of acid burns- they're pretty nifty.

And as cool as the whole river of fire is visually, my brain would explode if I tried to write it, because everyone would die after a few minutes of walking around in that place- you know what hot air does to a turkey? It does that to humans, too; it's called heat stroke, and it causes your body to shut down slowly and painfully... if it doesn't just cook you alive from the inside first. And the worst thing is... 'Conquest' didn't have weird, impossible things like this. Yeah, you could make clones of yourself in one map, but that was in -REDACTED-, where everything _already_ tells physics to go fuck itself. 'Birthright', in trying to show how “totally super-cool and radical!” it is, just bogs the whole story down with opportunities to show how creative the design team was. “Ooh, ooh! We need a lava level! That's standard RPG gold!” “Yeah, but volcanoes have been done to death... _I know!_ It'll be a waterfall... but made of _fire!_ That's TWO locations, merged into one, even cooler location!” “What should the victory condition for it be? Maybe... having to hold certain points until the fire dies down so you can progress?” “...are you fucking high? We'll just make it a “Defeat the Boss” map, GAWD! Now, sprinkle this coke on my balls so I can figure out what kind of monster to turn Garon into on this route!” Yeah... that river's a no-go...


	18. Psychotropic

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Ch.18- “Psychotropic”

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_Nerr felt something tickle against her nose, lazily lifting a hand to brush it away. A faint buzzing sound filled her ears, before fading off, and the princess opened her eyes. The sky was bright, but not the unpleasantly blinding bright of Hoshido. The clouds above her were all dyed pink, contrasting beautifully with the deep blue sky. Everything was warm and lovely- the very air seemed perfumed. Birdsong, high and sweet, rang out around her as the tiny creatures, their plumage iridescent in the light, flitted from tree to tree. The grass beneath her was thick and soft, like a plush rug, and it was very reluctantly that she sat up, stretching in a way only someone how had awoken from a content sleep could._

 

 _It was spring time, wherever she was; all around, flowers in every hue available in nature bloomed, swaying gently in the warm breeze, their scent intoxicating. Nerr didn't know where she was, but it was a damn sight better than where she had been. Getting to her feet, she took a moment to wiggle her bare toes in the grass, the sensation titillating, and she laughed slightly. So_ that _was what grass was supposed to feel like- she often seen pictures of verdant fields in books, but had never thought it could be so pleasant. She wasn't sure where she was going, but figured that if she picked a direction and walked, she'd come across something interesting. And indeed she did, insects who's gossamer wings shimmered as they fluttered past her, chubby rabbits with floppy ears hopping by... it was the perfect place to have a picnic, something straight out of her fairytales._

 

_The Nohrian girl stopped as she came to a shallow pool, the water crystal clear and allowing her to see the mosaic of stones on the bottom. It seemed to be fed by a small stream that poured in running over a tiny, makeshift waterfall, a large tree growing right beside it and casting most of the pond in shade. It was an utterly charming sight. Smiling widely, she stepped into the pool, the cool water lapping around her ankles. She climbed up to the opposite bank, craning her head back to look up at the tree. Large, glossy leaves provided a thick canopy, and amongst them, she could make out bright crimson fruit hanging from the branches. Apples!_

 

_Oh, how long had it been since she'd eaten apples in any shape or form...? Not since her birthday- they'd been in her kugelhopf. Several grew on a low hanging branch, and she reached out, plucking one. The vivid red reminded her of the jewels her sisters often brought from the mines for her to looks at, huge stones that would be used to make their weapons stronger. The smaller ones went into jewelry, but Nerr had always preferred them more in their raw, ore state. Such beautiful things came from the earth... She sank her teeth deep into the fruit, piercing the skin and biting down into the tender flesh with a loud crunch. Sweet juices flooded her mouth, even as they ran down her chin._

 

 _“My my, selfish as ever...” Perhaps normally, she would've been afraid of a random voice speaking to her in a deserted location, but she was far too content and at ease to care much. Lowering her snack, she looked around, her gaze stopping on a hooded figure sitting beside her. Well... sitting was a strong term to use. It seemed to be floating beside her, but (her dreamy mind supplied), it was entirely possible that it was just seated on an invisible stool. Bright pink and violet flames lapped at the figure's thighs, but gave off no heat. It almost reminded her of the hooded monster that had attacked them both in Shirasagi and on their way to Nestra, but this one, despite it's harsh tone, did not strike her as a threat. In fact, it was impossible to tell what it was supposed to be. While it appeared humanoid in shape and stature, it's face was mostly concealed with a large hood and it's voice sounded like a chorus of people, men and women, young and old, all speaking at the same time in alternating pitch. Even so,_ all _the voices seemed... familiar, in a way, and it did even more in making her feel safe._

 

_“What are you talking about?” She asked through a full mouth, making an effort to cover it with her hand._

_“Did it ever occur to you that that apple wasn't yours for the taking?” A valid point, but Nerr hardly saw any reason to get upset over a small piece of fruit._

_“No, I suppose not... but I never assumed it was anyone else's, either. It's a tree, in the middle of nowhere. I don't see anyone's name on it.”_

_“And if you_ had _, would that have stopped you?” The princess frowned slightly, crossing her arms over her chest._

 

_“I sincerely doubt it. It's one little piece of fruit, and I'm hungry. Whoever may or may not own it can surely part with something for the good of another.” The figure unfolded their crossed legs, sinking down to the ground slightly. Whatever they were, they were taller than her by a full head, and it made her feel very small to have to look up at them. While she could see no eyes, she could definitely see their mouth, and it was turned down in a frown._

_“A fine thing to say when you are not making the sacrifice. Would you give up something of yours, something that makes you happy, just to benefit another?” Nerr looked down at the apple in her hand. The previously off-white flesh where she had bitten into it had turned an unpleasant brown. Even the mouthful she still had tucked in the corner of her cheek tasted... brown. Tougher, harder to chew. She gave up on chewing and swallowed it whole._

 

 _“I don't have very much to begin with, but if it was something I didn't_ need _, I think I could part with it.” The hooded figure stepped closer, leaving her to step back. The grass no longer felt so soft under her feet, nor did the air smell so sweet._

_“Then why don't you? You have something- something that's not helping you, and something that would help others greatly if you gave it up.”_

_“And just what might that be?” The being reached into their wide sleeve and pulled out a folded piece of paper, handing it to her. Needing both hands to unfold it, but not willing to waste food, the princess clamped the apple in her teeth and slowly unfolded it. Her jaw went slack, and the fruit tumbled out, hitting the ground with a muted thump._

 

_In her hand was a small picture, but she recognized it as a much larger painting, one that hung on the wall of her room. The Nohrian royal family often had their portraits painted, but as she was never allowed to leave the fortress, she had never been included in them until a few years ago when all her siblings came to the Northern Citadel, painter in tow. She'd had to stay still for hours in tight, uncomfortable clothes, but when they had brought her her own copy of the portrait a few days later, that had made it all worth it. As her hands trembled, the image seemed to shift, to another, less formal portrait... that was hanging up on her wall, as well- happy moments frozen in time of her family... ALL of her family... Nerr's hand tightened around the paper, crumpling it slightly._

 

_“THIS isn't helping me?”_

_“It's unproductive.” The figure waved their hand lazily, brushing off her anger. “Idyllic childhood dreams you can no longer return to. Events have happened, choices have been made- YOUR choices... You have a family that would be happy to love you if you'd let them.”_

_“They don't want me.” She whispered bitterly. “They want 'Nerrida'...”_

 

 _“And you can BE Nerrida; you just have to sacrifice_ that _...” It gestured to the painting she held. Nerr looked back down at it. Something wet oozed under her foot, and she glanced at it, recoiling in horror at the sight of bright crimson splashed across the dry, dying grass. A heart, pink and sticky, lay at her feet, still pulsing despite the ragged hole torn into it. Above her, similar hearts hung beating from the barren branches of the tree, blood dripping from their arteries, some drops splashing onto her picture, leaving red streaks. The sky blackened with smoke, which hung heavy and acrid in the air. Breathing shakily, she turned around, nearly colliding with the hooded figure, who was standing so close the flames wreathing them licked at her as well. It was like being enveloped in cold smoke._

 

_“Just give it up. The Nohrians will finally be able to move on, and the Hoshidans will be happy. It benefits everyone involved.”_

_“Everyone but ME!” She spat bitterly. How did abandoning her identity and pretending to be someone else benefit her? The being before her scowled deeply. Behind them, she could see that the clear waters of the lake had turned black as ink, leaving an oily residue behind on the grass near the shore._

 

 _“All you ever do- all you've ever done... is think about yourself. What YOU want, what makes YOU happy..._ Heroes _are supposed to be selfless! Give yourself up for the greater good!”_

_“NO!” She shouted back, stomping her foot like a child throwing a tantrum. “I won't! If I don't think about myself, who else will?!”_

_“Who else, indeed...” As she stomped again, her foot sank into the ground, leaving her very lopsided. Gasping slightly, she looked down to see her leg, sunk in to the knee in a dark pit that was growing ever wider. Not the darkness of the night sky, or even that of a dank prison cell, but the intangible void of nonexistence... as the earth crumbled and fell into the pit, so too did her other leg. She caught herself on the edge of the hole, but the cold nothingness was sucking her in, making it impossible to pull herself back up. The hooded figure stood over her, it's hands held behind it's back as it looked down. “You don't have anyone else, do you? You're all... alone...” The grass she was holding on to came lose at the roots, sending her tumbling down heels over head into the cold abyss. Alone... She was alone... Alone..._

 

_“...alone... ...leave her alone...!”_

 

Nerr's eyes flew open, and she gasped for air as if she had been submerged under water for hours. That first breath seemed to kick start her whole body, for her heart began thundering in her chest painfully fast. Though her eyes were wide, she could barely see, everything around her blurred yet overly bright. People were talking around her, but their voices seemed to blur together as well, undercut with a high pitched whine that bore into her ears painfully and made it feel as though her head was splitting open.

 

“--op leaning over her! Oh! It looks like she's awake, now!” A relieved sigh.

“Thank the gods. I was beginning to get worried for a while there.” A low chuckle.

“That's because you haven't seen her in action. Nerrida-sama has shrugged off much worse injuries than this.” It seemed to be three people talking, two women and a man, by the sound of it. Blinking hard several times, the Nohrian princess tried to focus her swimming vision. A blur of purple appeared in front of her.

 

“How do you feel, Nerrida-sama?” The woman addressing her had a high voice that almost sounded like a laugh. She recognized that voice- it belonged to... Orochi? Yes, that was her name, one of the Hoshidan mages traveling with them, her mother's retainer. She had been quite skilled with medicinal herbs and healing, so she had probably seen about her after the debacle in Fort Dragonfall. For a moment, she wondered where Jakob was (the man's voice she'd heard wasn't his), but then remembered he was no longer her retainer. That was fine; he hadn't been rushing to heal her as of late, anyways... Realizing that she was lying down on something, her immediate thought was to get up, but no sooner did she put any weight on her forearms did a sharp pain surge through them, the world beginning to sway and tilt violently, pitching her to the side. A pair of large hands caught her.

 

“Ah! You must be careful, milady! You still aren't completely well!” That was the man she had heard speak before. Blinking, and trying to ignore the way everything flashed when her eyes were closed, she looked up to see an older man with messy, dusky blue hair holding her steady. Behind dusty, cracked lenses, his eyes were fearful. Nerr frowned slightly, reaching up weakly to point at him.

“...I remember you... from Shirasagi.” His lips tugged into a slight smile.

“Yes, I'm--”

 

“Mister Exposition.” She cut him off, her voice weak but still dripping with contempt. “You're the one who knew everything about everything except... how to provide a gods damn guard detail for your ruler. You're ruling Hoshido in Ryouma's absence; why are you here? Unless...” A sudden thought filled her with dread. “Am I back in Hoshido? Is-- Is the war over, did you take me back? Oh gods, how long have I been unconscious?!” Another pair of hand, smaller but firmer, laid her back down, tugging a thin comforter over her. Yuugiri smiled down at her in a very maternal way. To Nerr, the sight of the darkened scar on her face proved more of a comfort than her smile.

“Calm yourself, Nerrida-sama. It's only been about two days since we left Fort Dragonfall. The war is not yet won, so don't worry; there's plenty of fighting left for you.” She chuckled to herself slightly, probably envisioning the battles that would come as they came upon the castle. The Nohrian girl was not put at ease by those words.

 

“Then what--” Yukimura (that was his name, right?) would not make eye contact with her, his hands curled into tight fists as he focused his attention on the frozen ground.

“I have brought reinforcements to help aid Ryouma-sama on this front.”

“...what about the Hoshidan front?” The strategist shut his eyes tightly.

“Throwing our soldiers to break themselves against Nohr's might will accomplish nothing. At this point... all we can do is cut off the head and pray the body will follow...”

 

What he did not say spoke volumes. So, it was as she had predicted; Garon had used Ryouma's absence and the lack of leadership in Hoshido to scale a full fledged invasion, and they had been ravaged. She wondered if the high prince already knew. He must have; as her mind began catching up to her, she realized that the small camp they usually formed was looking much larger, with more soldiers than she was used to milling about, sharpening weapons, packing healing staffs and vulneraries... the sudden crowd made her skin crawl uncomfortably. Nerr sighed through her nose and closed her eyes. She could no longer feel the holes that had been bored in her flesh, though her skin still felt uncomfortably hot, a searing that seemed to grow more intense the longer she didn't distract herself with other thoughts. The heat grew so unpleasant, so overwhelming, that she felt herself panting despite the snow on the ground. Orochi's near constant grin died away at once.

 

“Oh. Are you in pain, milady? It must be time to change your bandages. This would probably be easier if you were still asleep...” The diviner slowly lifted the covers from her legs, and the princess lifted her head as much as she was able to see that her lower half was completely wrapped in bandages, matching her arms and hands.

 

She was wearing a long, loose tunic, something that must have belonged to Azura, given that it was white as well as too small in the bust. But it was probably necessary, given that the healers needed easy access to her injuries, not to mention her clothes were probably riddled with holes. As Orochi slowly began undoing the narrow strips, she noticed the ugly red marks branching along her left leg, splotches where the skin was pulled tight. The right leg, still darker with thicker skin, displayed it's burns differently, the flesh appearing rougher. Upon closer examination, it was riddled with tiny craters, like melted sugar had when it cooled and the bubbles on it's surface popped. It was so strange, to see herself covered with disfiguring marks.

 

More than anything, she was grateful to still have full use of all her limbs and faculties after so many injuries, but it was still... disconcerting. She was used to hurts never leaving a mark on her. If she sliced her finger open, it would close and not even leave a scar. If she broke a bone, it would heal and she'd be back out, running drills the next day. If her fingers and toes started freezing, she'd just go to sleep and wake up right as rain. Being left with physical reminders of being hurt was an entirely new experience for her, but in and of itself, it didn't bother her. After all, it wasn't as if she had to worry about anyone thinking her body was ugly; she had no one to impress. No, it made her sad as an afterthought, after she realized that, being riddled in scars as she was, she was very similar to how Gunther used to be. He, too, had been covered in scars, so many that she wondered what he could've faced on the battlefield to have incurred them. Perhaps he too had been doused in digestive juices, or triggered a Mokushuujin trap... She would never get to ask, now.

 

As gruesome as it was to watch, she did not turn away as her wounds were cleaned, pus oozing out and skin sloughing off. It just made her more grateful to still be alive. Orochi, who's deft hands made quick work of pouring vulneraries over the skin to keep it from getting infected, said that Takumi and Scarlett had suffered similar wounds, but theirs weren't as severe. Nerr remembered the Hoshidan prince wading through the lake of acid to provide her with aid, and the sight of the burns on his own legs; had it not been for his efforts, she'd probably be blind, if not just dead. When she was well enough to walk again, she'd have to seek him out and thank him. Or maybe just leave him a note, so he couldn't complain that he was busy. She gripped the covers under her hands tightly, her tender knuckles feeling as though the skin that covered them would split apart at any moment. The sound of a quiet sigh barely penetrated the haze of pain, but she still shifted her gaze to see Yukimura looking at her, his brows drawn. Nerr frowned slightly.

 

“Is something wrong?”

“Of course not, Nerrida-sama. I was just thinking... it's a small blessing your mother isn't here to see you like this...” The Nohrian girl's frown deepened, anger blending in with her pain, feeding off it. Why the hell wouldn't her mother want to see her in such a state? Mothers were _supposed_ to want to see their children when they were injured, to comfort them. Of course, she had never had a mother growing up, but both Camilla and Gunther had filled that role for her, and she knew they would've been right beside her, holding her hand until she felt better...

“I imagine she would be disappointed that I allowed the Nohrians to reduce me to such a state.” The princess spat, and Yukimura looked up to meet her eyes, his own wide in confusion.

 

“What? No! Goodness no, nothing could be further from the truth! Mikoto-sama just... worried about you so...” Yuugiri nodded, a slight smile drawing lines deeper around her lips, though her eyes were sad.

“Oh yes... I remember those days. When you were little, the slightest sneeze would send her running about in a mad panic; gods forbid a bruise or scratch...” The tactician also smiled a bit.

“Which was quite unfortunate, seeing as you were always dashing off and colliding into something as a child. Sumeragi-sama said he would never let you around weapons, because you would do more harm to yourself than any opponent, and he couldn't bear the thought of anything happening to you.” Her earlier anger dissolved, corroded away by a strange sorrow. Nerr had no idea why she felt so miserable all of a sudden; they were recounting memories she didn't have about people she didn't know. It made no sense for her to feel anything either way, and yet... as she blinked, she could feel tears dripping down her cheeks. Yuugiri noticed first, concern darkening the Kinshi knight's face.

 

“Nerrida-sama? Are you alright?”

“I apologize if our reminiscing has dredged up any sad memories, milady...” She turned away from them both, not wanting to look at them with tears blurring her vision.

“Just leave me be...” She whispered tightly, closing her eyes and trying to focus on her breathing to calm herself, just as Xander had always taught her to do. Royals must conceal their feelings, not show them; as a princess, she always needed to appear calm and collected. When she only thought about breathing in and out, even the incessant chatter in the background seemed to die away. The chatter in the foreground, however, was not so easily ignored.

 

“There's nothing shameful in being sad, Nerrida-sama. We all mourn Mikoto-sama and Sumeragi-sama greatly. Perhaps I did not know them as long as Yuugiri and Yukimura, but... the empress was as a second mother to me. When she died...” The diviner paused in her ministrations, and Nerr could tell that her own violet eyes were misty. “I felt as though a part of me died as well. I cannot imagine what you must feel.”

 

“No. You can't. Because you knew my mother far better than I did.” The older woman gaped at her slightly, and the princess looked away, not wanting to see the judgment she knew would seep into her gaze. “Strangers... a city full of strangers died that day. Had such a thing happened in Nohr, I'd have had to bury her in the pauper's cemetery, for only a week earlier, I hadn't known my mother from any other stranger on the street. I never spoke to her, had an actual conversation with her. The only words we ever exchanged was me yelling at her to keep her word and let me return home... I knew nothing about her, and she nothing about me. ...she was just a stranger...!” Unbidden, unwelcome, the tears came back again, squeezing out through her tightly shut eyes. Fortunately, Orochi had the sense to make no more comment on it, but as she gently cleaned the raw skin covering Nerr's knuckles, she made a quiet offer.

 

“If you would like... I could tell you a bit about her. Orochi has many fond memories of Mikoto-sama.” Second-hand memories of her mother; was that really something to be content with? She missed the days when she simply didn't think about having a mother, when someone could tell her she'd sprouted from a sown tooth and that would seem likely... Parents did nothing but complicate things, be they dead or alive, but as she glanced up at the diviner, up at those expectant violet eyes, she nodded. The last thing she needed was for people to turn on her and try to stab her in her sleep because she didn't properly revere their empress.

“Not today, though.”

“Of course, Nerrida-sama. You just need to focus on getting well.”

000

 

Getting well was easier said than done. By some miracle, Nerr still had use of her arms and legs, though not fully as every small movement made it feel as if she were still wallowing in acid, but it could have been much worse. Being unconscious for two days also seemed to allow her natural propensity for healing to once again kick in, leading Orochi to happily declare that at this rate, she could be walking again in another day or two if she rested well. The problem was, it was very difficult to rest, much less sleep, in the middle of a large, bustling camp full of talkative Hoshidans.

 

It had been months since Nerr wished she were back in the Northern Citadel, but cringing away whenever feet came too near to where she was laying and trying to block out the incessant confabulation that seemed to worm it's way into her brain through every orifice in her head made her long for the quiet solitude of home. The princess closed her eyes, wishing she could roll over onto her side, but her burns prevented her from moving in either direction, and being that she was laying on hard, cold ground, that wouldn't have been very comfortable regardless. She could feel a migraine starting in her temples and working it's way across her skull under her skin, until her whole head felt like it would be crushed under the pressure of the pain. Groaning softly, she tried to relax- that was the only remedy available to her. Follow Silas' advice; think happy thoughts...

 

Nerr wondered if tea time had passed or not yet come. Perhaps it was time for tea at that very instant. Tea was taken very seriously back at the citadel, and she had always been very happy for that fact, for it meant a pleasant break from the cycle of studying and training and longing that made up her life. So many different blends, though she preferred the spicy, dark one that was supposed to be served with lots of cream and sugar- what was it called? Tiger's Milk?- for it went delightfully with the little pastries and sandwiches that were served alongside it. Even though she herself couldn't brew tea (she could barely boil water- she was no alchemist) baking cakes and cookies and sweetened rolls came naturally to her. Gunther had taught her how to bake- it was one of the few things he could do that didn't result in the food having an odd, metallic tang. In fact, he had been the one to teach Flora and Jakob how to brew tea as well (Felicia said he gave up trying to teach her, and suggested she only use tea as a weapon). The princess smiled slightly, feeling the tension ease from her shoulders and temples.

 

Maybe she had been wrong to knock the whole, “think happy thoughts” thing- after all, being back in the citadel's library was much better than being in some cold, stinking Hoshidan camp. When she inhaled, it wasn't smoke and greasy, bloody clothes and unwashed bodies that assaulted her sensitive nostrils, but the familiar scent of old paper and ink and dust. Not much light came in through the tall windows, their iron mullion casting even more shadows over the large chamber, so lanterns hung on all the walls, their flickering purple flames enchanted to never go out or burn out of control. The pianoforte Xander had delivered to the citadel as a gift when she was a child sat in the corner, near the couches and chairs, their brocade upholstery faded and worn and the decorative legs covered in marks where rats gnawed on it, but still comfortable. The library was the one place everyone could gather and shrug off both their mantles and burdens... Nerr could practically feel the cool ivory beneath her fingertips, a much gentler instrument than the violin, with it's cutting strings, exactly what she liked to play when she wasn't feeling her best yet craved music. She tapped out a gentle, repetitive melody.

 

“Nerrida.” She wished Xander was there to play something for her- he should have thrown down his sword and crown, for his calling in life was clearly to be a pianist. “Nerrida, I know you aren't asleep.” Nerr opened her eyes, the warm, comforting illusion giving way to the slushy, noisy reality. Ryouma was standing over her, not wearing his armor and looking much less crustaceous as a result. His long, shaggy hair fell loose around his shoulders, all the way down to his waist. How was he not embarrassed to walk around looking like that? Given that she herself had had relatively long hair until recently, she knew how much work went into maintaining it. Long hair was for women who were expected to spend hours making their toilette, not men who were supposed to be warriors. The princess frowned at her blood brother.

 

“Excuse me, can't you see I'm hallucinating here? What do you want?” Hoshido's heir stared at her for a long moment, perhaps trying to determine if he should take her words seriously or not. In the end, it didn't matter, for he heaved a deep sigh, looking very worn out.

“You were right. Yukimura has told me that the Nohrian army came from the southern coast, rather than overland like we were expecting. With the aid of the Mokushuujin, they've already taken over several prefectures and are occupying Shirasagi as we speak.” Nerr nodded.

“I know. In fact, I've known that for months now; it's everything I've been warning you would happen. Have you come here for me to gloat at you? 'Nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh nyeh; Hoshido's getting conquered. Heh heh heh heh heh heh...'” She mock teased in a sing-song voice. Without his spiky mask on, she could see the vein in his temple throbbing as he flushed in anger.

 

“This is no time for mockery, Nerrida! I've come to impose the urgency of the situation upon you.” He knelt down beside her, his eyes hard. She could see dark circles under them. “The Rainbow Sage said that the Yatogami can become more powerful, perhaps enough to level the playing field. It could be pivotal in dealing with Garon and driving Nohr out of Hoshido, but it falls upon _you_ to tap into that power.” Nerr met his gaze, trying her hardest to refrain from rolling her eyes; they still hurt, after all.

“And? In case you didn't realize this, Ryouma, I am all of one person. Is your brilliant plan to send me, alone, to deal with Nohr's might whilst you sit comfortably on your imperial ass? If you're so concerned with power, you could have asked the Rainbow Sage, or whatever he was, to give _you_ power as well. He did it for your father, why not you? Sure, you'd probably have to go through your own trial, but wouldn't that be a small price to pay?” The samurai seemed taken aback by her words, but quickly recovered himself.

 

“The Yatogami chose _you_ , sister--”

“Well, that's _it's_ problem, now isn't it? It must've chosen me knowing full well what I'm about. You can spout as many fairytales about 'Chosen Ones' and 'Heroes' as you want, but the fact is, you just want someone to make things easier for you, someone to blame when everything goes wrong. When you lose this war, it won't be because years of living under a magic bubble made your army soft, or because you didn't think anything through, or because you were too busy playing house with Scarlet to lead your country; it'll be because _I_ wasn't strong enough to deal with all of your problems for you.” Ryouma looked stricken, and Nerr knew that she had hit the crux of his issue. After all, she had become an expert at shifting blame- it was all too clear when others were trying the same thing.

 

“...this is truly my fault, isn't it?” His fingers curled tightly in the fabric of his robes, his arms trembling slightly. “I thought I was doing the right thing, that we could storm into Nohr and demand this war end. I thought a show of force would be enough, and when I met Scarlet and the other members of the resistance, I felt for sure that everything would go the way I'd hoped, that even Nohrians would stand behind us...”

“And how's that going for you, hmm? Perhaps you should be speaking to Scarlet about this; she would lend you a more sympathetic ear than I ever could.” Ryouma shook his head, his lips set in a thin line.

 

“No. ...no, sympathy is the last thing I need at the moment. Softness, kindness... they may well have made me weaker than I care to admit. A lifetime of everything being easy has left me unable to deal with things being harder. I've rushed into battle headlong like a fool, I've put everyone around me at risk for the sake of my pride... It never occurred to me how easily everything could go wrong until it did.” His gaze, as he met her eyes, was no longer cold and hard... in the depths of his eyes, she could see fear, could practically smell it wafting from him. “Every time you told me to return to Hoshido, I brushed you off, telling myself that those were the words of a coward, that you had been taught Nohr's craven ways and that when I won this war, I would show you that everything you knew was wrong. Gods help me, if I could turn time back to our reunion in Chevalier, I'd be on the first boat leaving for home by morning...”

 

“Time doesn't flow in reverse, Ryouma, as much as we cry and pray for it to.” Nerr said quietly. She understood what he was feeling; she herself was a master of thinking “if only”. “If it did, I'd have returned to Nohr when I had the chance. Better to die with my head held high than live in regret as a coward...” The prince's jaw tightened.

“Even after all this time, you still think staying in your homeland was a mistake?”

“I miss my family!” She shouted at him, not caring who heard or stared. “I miss my friends, I miss my life! 'Out of sight, out of mind' might be how it works for _you_ , but alas, I have no whores to distract me from what I'm missing! I'd like to see how _you'd_ feel if you spent your little vacation amidst the Nohrian army rather than your rebel friends. Being surrounded by strangers you'd learned to hate, nothing comforting or familiar to be found, only constant reminders that the people around you would murder those you love without a second thought...” She sniffled, reaching up to wipe her eyes despite the pain of her bandaged arm as it was scrubbed. “You don't want my advice; you've never listened to a word I've said, and you won't start now. Go commiserate with your rebel slut and leave me alone.” She sounded like a petulant child, her voice thick with tears, but she didn't care.

 

If he didn't keep trying to make her feel so guilty, Nerr would've told Ryouma that, if Hoshido was already conquered, his best bet would've been to give up any hopes of stopping Garon and plead with the king for an armistice. Hoshido would become a Nohrian territory, but the king may be willing to accept surrender so as to ensure there was no more senseless loss of life. But, by his own admission, the high prince would not want to hear that. He'd accuse her of putting Nohr before Hoshido, and she wouldn't even lie and tell him that wasn't the case, but it wouldn't make her advice any less prudent. Still, if Ryouma was going to gripe about her not putting Nohr behind her yet, he could come up with his own plan.

 

That oddly familiar, yet terribly distorted voice from her dream echoed in her mind, _All you ever do is think about yourself..._ She had ideas, she had solutions that, if they didn't explicitly _benefit_ Hoshido, at least contained a problem and kept losses to a minimum. As far as she'd been taught, that was a victory. But that wasn't good enough for anyone, so they were free to think for themselves.

000

 

She'd had peace, if not silence, for no more than twenty minutes when Azura approached her. At once, Nerr's defenses went up, wondering if the songstress had perhaps overheard her conversation with their brother and come to berate her, but as the other woman sat beside her, there was only a small, but genial, smile on her face. If nothing else, it put her slightly at ease.

 

“How are you doing, Nerr? You look much better.”

“Am I bleeding from the ears?” The singer shook her head, and Nerr shrugged as best as she was able to. “Then I must be okay. It's still kind of hard to see; everything is so blurry...” Azura frowned slightly at that.

“Your face was pretty badly burned. Takumi said one of the Faceless held you under the acid. It's a miracle you survived.” She scoffed slightly.

“Miracle? More like pure, dumb luck. It feels like some twisted luck is pushing us forward at every turn.”

 

“Perhaps the gods are smiling on us?”

“I don't trust that. The ancient ones are said to be incredibly fickle in history books. They give with one claw and take with the other. Being in the debt of the gods means waiting for the other shoe to drop.” Azura's frown deepened.

“In Hoshido, we're taught that the gods give us their blessing because they love us, not because they expect anything in return.”

“Well, perhaps sitting on one's backside and collecting hand outs from the gods wasn't the proper way to go. It seems that Nohr is stuck firmly in Hoshido's craw, and there's nothing that can be done about it but pray that the gods still love you enough to make everything better...” The singer shuddered slightly, wrapping her arms around herself.

 

“It's really true, then? Hoshido has been invaded... I overheard Yukimura discussing that with Ryouma, but I couldn't believe it. I don't think anyone can.”

“And I think that's part of the problem, Azura. For so long, Hoshidans have been living in a blissful paradise, blocking out the problems around them. Now that they can't anymore, they don't know how to handle it. Especially Ryouma.” Nerr sighed, feeling the pain come back to her temples. “When Garon dies, I know Nohr will be in good hands with Xander. Better hands, even. Him, Camilla, Leo... I know they all have what it takes to deal with crises, and I know that Xander will see to it that Elise will as well. ...I don't have that same confidence in the Hoshidan royal family. Sakura aside, they're brash and overly confident in their own abilities, which- truth be told- are fine and dandy for racking up kills in battle, but less suitable for ruling a country that, at best, will only ever have an uneasy truce with the neighboring kingdom that has a much larger, much more competent army.” Azura leaned forward, her golden eyes large and tinged with fear.

 

“You don't really think that's the best outcome we can hope for, do you, Nerr? If we defeat King Garon, there _must_ be peace!”

“According to whom?” The Nohrian princess scoffed. “Did Ryouma or Mikoto tell you that? There's no defeating Nohr's army- that's not even an option- and the only way you can ensure that Garon doesn't retaliate against you is by cutting off the head and burning it for good measure. And then you'll have his children to contend with. I tell you from experience, Azura; they won't simply lie down while their father is slaughtered. Was Ryouma thinking of brokering peace when his mother was killed? So how can anyone think that Xander will be more open to doing so? ...no matter how much I wrack my mind trying to do so, I can't imagine this war ever truly ending with the exception of one possible outcome.” The singer drew back slightly, her brows furrowed.

 

“And what outcome would that be?”

“If _I_ kill Garon personally. Think about it; my brothers and sisters aren't stupid enough to believe I've really been taken in by Hoshido's rallying cries, and I've already explained everything to Camilla and Leo. Even if Xander doesn't care, he would at least understand that my motives are mine alone. Once the perpetrator is executed, Xander would be smart enough to realize the war no longer needs to be fought. He's a prudent man; he would be more interested in trying to organize trade between the kingdoms rather than war.”

“But... wouldn't the perpetrator in that scenario be _you?_ ”

“Indeed.”

“...you would be willing to throw your life away for peace between the kingdoms?” Nerr looked up at the other princess, her eyes narrowed.

 

“...if I could squeeze my fingers, Azura, I'd choke you with that cape you call hair. Have I ever given you any indication that _anything_ I do is for the sake of Hoshido? I'm not throwing my life away for anything... I'm choosing to end it on my own terms.” Thinking that she and her siblings could be a family again was as much of a fairytale as all the chosen hokum everyone around her spouted. Gunther was dead, Flora was dead, Lilith lived far away from her, and when she finally raised a hand against Garon, she would only have two options. Live in exile in Hoshido, or face death at the hands of the new king. Certainly, the Hoshidans themselves, and Elise if no one else, would prefer she stay alive, but the memory of those long, unhappy days, languishing in her dusty prison cell, surrounded by the garbage of some strange child as she mourned for what she had lost... That wasn't living. Of course, that wasn't something she could discuss with anyone, for surely, they wouldn't understand what her issue was. Azura shook her head, long lazuline hair swaying around her shoulders. Nerr could see tangles in it, and it no longer looked as nice as it had back in Hoshido; being unable to wash it for weeks was probably a contributing factor.

 

“I don't know what to think about you, Nerr. Sometimes you say things that seem almost noble, and then you immediately contradict it by saying something horrible. Does Hoshido really mean nothing to you?”

“I think we've already had this conversation... which means you know the answer. And really, Azura, if you can't have a care for your true kingdom, then you don't get to give me any flack about how I feel towards mine. I know you told Leo you're not Nohrian, but your mother was the queen. _She_ must have loved this country; would you whine and bitch to _her_ about putting it before Hoshido?” Azura's eyes narrowed, flashing with anger.

“Don't speak about my mother that way.”

 

“I'm speaking of my former queen with nothing but the utmost respect; _you're_ the one I have a problem with, Azura. I don't understand you people! How can you feel _nothing_ for the past, how can you sever ties so quickly and move on from things like nothing matters to you?!”

“That's not true, Nerr--”

“Yes, it is! Clearly, it's true, otherwise, you would understand! When we first met and you told me that you would prefer to stay in Hoshido rather than return to Nohr, I didn't spend every waking second complaining about it, reminding you that your _real_ family loved and missed you and that you were making the wrong choice! I accepted it, because I understand how that feels; I _know_ what it's like to connect with a place and the people there, and feel at home, and I thought that _you_ at least would understand that I felt the same way, but I was wrong!” She shook her head helplessly, feeling her throat tighten as her eyes began burning again. It was easier to pretend it was from the burns that had yet to heal.

 

“You clearly have never loved anything, Azura, because if you had, you would understand. It's not that Hoshido means _nothing_ to me; it's that everything I love means so much more. Loving something and losing it... loving someone and knowing there's no conceivable way that you can ever be together with them again... It's enough to drive a person to madness...” Or at the very least, vengeance, her mind bitterly supplied. The songstress remained silent for a long time, while Nerr breathed deeply, feeling her eyes dry. The silence went on for so long, it came as a surprise when she finally spoke.

 

“You're wrong, Nerr. I have loved, things and people... very much. I loved my mother. I loved our country... But those things were taken away from me by a force much grander than the scope of a human's comprehension.”

“What, fate?”

 

“No... I'd call it a plague, a plague named Anankos.” She spat bitterly, as though the very word were bile in her mouth. Despite all her anger and annoyance, Nerr had only ever seen that level of pure loathing in the singer's eyes once before, when they had confronted Garon in Nestra. “Something that destroys everything in it's path until there's nothing left but ruin and misery...” Huh. So... some kind of plague swept through wherever Azura hailed from, and eventually sickened her mother? That wasn't odd; many people fell to various illnesses that swept across the land, sweating sickness and black fever... She'd never heard of anything called Anankos, though. The other princess continued, her voice lower, almost inaudible.

“If there were a glimmer of hope of getting back to the way things were, if I could lay the blame of what happened at the feet of something I could hurt... maybe I would feel the same as you. But as I can't, I find it more productive to let go of the past. I still cherish my memories, but longing for things that cannot be would do nothing but hurt me.” That felt like a jab in her direction, but Nerr said nothing.

 

Azura was right, of course, but letting go of the past was a skill she had not yet learned. It was a skill she did not _want_ to learn, for it seemed more and more apparent that there was nothing of worth awaiting her in the future. Both princesses lapsed into silence once more, a silence that was soon broken by the sound of approaching steps. Nerr looked up, frowning slightly as she saw Takumi drawing near, carrying a cup of something. He was probably there to speak to Azura; if she closed her eyes quickly, she could maybe pretend to be asleep. The last thing she was in the mood for was listening to him bitch at her that it was her fault that the Nohrian army had overtaken Hoshido- after all, who _else_ could be at fault for such a thing? Quickly slamming her eyes shut, she tried to slow her breathing to better emulate sleep.

 

“Nee-san?” It appeared that she was successful; he had gone straight to speaking to Azura without laying into her. Of course, he could always decide to veer from his train of thought, or--

“Nerr.” She cringed slightly as Azura touched her arm, and shut her eyes tighter. “Open your eyes, Nerr.”

“I'm sleeping.”

“...you're awfully talkative for someone who's sleeping...”

“...I'm sleep talking... you'd better leave... before I start... sleep punching...” She said through fake snores.

 

“Maybe I should come back later...” Takumi's voice was surprisingly quiet, lacking the usual arrogant edge it seemed to take whenever he was in her immediate vicinity.

“No, it's fine, Takumi-kun. She's not sleeping, she's just acting brattish. You know, I just remembered; I was going to help set up some targets so Sakura could practice bending her bow. I should do that now.” Nerr's eyes flew open just in time to see the songstress frowning at her. _Curse you, Azura_ , she mouthed silently as the other woman got up, leaving her alone with her blood brother. This was almost as bad as when Saizou had cornered her after Kaze's death- the anticipation alone was terrible.

 

“Okay, spit it out already. I know you've heard the news, so lay it on me; tell me that Nohrians are monsters, and I'm a monster for not wanting to exterminate the monsters with their own monsters. Just... say what you're gonna say so I can go back to pretending I'm not here...”

“I... wasn't going to say any of that.” His voice could almost be construed as meek, an anomaly to put it lightly. “Jakob made this for you.” He gestured to the cup in his hand. “He said it was some kind of tea to help you sleep so you would heal faster, but... then he said you probably wouldn't accept it if he brought it to you.”

 

“So he commissioned _you_ to do it instead?” She asked doubtfully. Takumi shook his head, looking anywhere but at her.

“No... I-- I volunteered.” That made it even more suspicious.

“Is it poison?” She spat, unable to accept that someone as disdainful and distrustful of her as Takumi would do something nice for her out of the goodness of his heart. This was probably a ploy to off the spy in their midst.

 

“No. I get why you would think like that, but... I swear, I'm not... I wouldn't do anything to hurt you.”

“...really. And what, pray tell, made you change your mind?” Sighing deeply, the young prince lowered himself to the ground beside her, setting the steaming cup on the ground. The golden liquid within looked a bit murky, and she could see black and pink specks floating within.

“I keep thinking about what the Rainbow Sage said. About us having to have open hearts to make the Yatogami more powerful--”

“Stop. Just fucking _stop._ I'm not listening to this from Ryouma, and I sure as hell won't listen to it from you. If you're so obsessed with power, then you can march your ass right back to Notre Sagesse, and--”

 

“That's not what I'm talking about!” He yelled at her, with enough force to actually quiet her. Breathing hard through his nose, Takumi seemed to curl in on himself, his voice growing weaker the longer he spoke. “I'm not saying that you should be strong enough to take on King Garon single handedly. I'm just... sorry that you hate me so much. I know you said you _don't_ hate me, but let's be honest; you do. And when I think about all the things I said to you... If someone said that stuff to me, I'd hate them, too. From the moment I met you, I've been nothing but cruel to you. ...I said you should've died, and then wondered why you didn't want to be my sister...” It took Nerr a while to understand what he was going on about, finally remembering that terrible day in Shirasagi. That was right; he had said that she should've died instead of their mother and the people caught in the blast... She had almost completely forgotten about that, too disgusted by his petulant mood and seething hatred of Nohrians to care about statements spewed out in the heat of the moment.

 

“Well, you're hardly alone in that sentiment. I'm sure _most_ Hoshidans think I should've died that day, as well as a great deal of Nohrians. Perhaps even fate itself... Maybe I missed my one chance to die, and now, I'll be cursed to live forever.” Even though she meant it as a joke, the longer she thought about it, the more the prospect of that being true weighed her stomach down like a bunch of rocks. Living while those she loved dropped like flies around her... such was hell. And the texts all said that dragons were incredibly long lived, comparing their millenia to mortal's scant few years. Nerr didn't know if the same applied to manaketes, but she prayed it didn't. Through the haze of dread hanging over her head, she barely realized Takumi was still speaking.

 

“--ave anymore right to blame you for that than I do. Even if you don't like Hoshido, even if, deep down, you still think of us as your enemy... you've helped us. Sakura told me all the hell you went through looking for me, and then Ryouma... You could've just walked away- and I know you wanted to... but you didn't.” He ran a hand through his hair, looking away from her awkwardly. “So... thanks for that, I guess. ...that's all I wanted to say.” He got to his feet and turned to walk away, pausing for a moment. “Oh, and Jakob said you should drink that tea while it's still warm.” How she was going to do that when she couldn't exactly lift herself up was the question, but as her blood brother began walking back towards the main part of camp, Nerr raised her voice to call out to him.

 

“Takumi!” He paused, looking back at her over his shoulder. “Thank you for covering me back there. I'd probably be soup if you hadn't.” After a moment, he nodded, a slight smile tugging at his lips as he turned away and continued on. Feeling that she had accomplished at least _one_ thing, the Nohrian princess reached out for the cup, wincing slightly. It probably wasn't all that hot, given that it was no longer steaming, but the slightest heat set her damaged nerves aflame. Biting through the pain, she raised her head a bit, still very unsteady, and took a draught. It tasted terribly bitter, but one could imagine that there was no sugar available; the only reason they had not yet run completely out of supplies was because their numbers had been so few and they had stocked up in Macarath. As close to Windmire as they were, it should've seemed that supplies were not an issue, but it was foolish to expect a warm welcome into the heart of Nohr.

000

c

A/N- I like writing filler more than actually dealing with the story presented in the game. So, a long time ago (back when I was still posting The Rising Dark) someone said that they really wanted me to include Yukimura in this route because his supports with the avatar are sweet. I posed them a question; how would I bring him to Nohr? Remember, there's no astral hopping bullshit in this story, which is why I didn't have Flora in TRD. They suggested he come over with reinforcements, and I thought, well, if he's bringing an army to help the guerrilla force stage a coup (which, in killing the king, is exactly what they're doing), then... it really feels like they're doing exactly the same thing the Nohrians did in Conquest. So I figured, I'd give a legitimate reason why they would show up- if they stay in Hoshido, they'll fucking _die._ What; did you think Garon was going to halt his invasion just because you're not there to witness it? I feel it also raises the stakes a bit, but who cares about that; this is a wacky, zappy adventure with no consequences! YAY! Seriously, it's all Ryouma's fault for dicking around in Chevalier for no fucking reason (cuz I'm not seeing any god damn Chevois soldiers save Scarlet in my party). The game might not be able to stop sucking his dick long enough to point out what a terrible ruler he's shaping up to be, but I sure don't mind~

And I know that in Yukimura's support, he says that him and Orochi were Mikoto's wranglers, but given that Orochi looks no older than Camilla (which would put her at about 22 in this fic), she would've been a young child during those memories, and I like including Yuugiri in things (why does she exist in the game? Or seventy percent of the other characters?) One last thing that has nothing to do with the story- it just makes me laugh. I _just_ realized that Paul Eiding, Yukimura's VA... voiced Gado in Bloody Roar: Primal Fury/Extreme (one of my favorite games for sheer FUN value). _Now_ it makes sense why he rides a lion puppet... Given that I don't watch anime or play games in Japanese, I can only relate characters to other characters their English VAs have done, which is _sooo_ much cooler most of the time (because English!Gunther doesn't need anyone else; he has... UROBORUS!)


	19. A Rude Awakening

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Ch.19- “A Rude Awakening”

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Whatever had been in that tea Jakob had made for her definitely did it's job, leaving her without sense or feeling for hours. Even in the morning, when she awoke to find the soldiers around her packing up their bedding and supplies, she was still incredibly groggy. Her vision was significantly less blurry, though, and when Orochi came to change her bandages and perform another round of healing, she impressed upon the princess that her wounds looked much better. Weak as she was, Nerr could at least sit up on her own without growing exhausted now. Her skin still hurt, but it wasn't the agonizing, searing pain she had come to expect. Still, even though she was recovering, she could not stand much less walk, so accompanying the other as they broke camp would be difficult. In the past, she would've told them to simply leave her alone, to join them when she was better or else, expire, knowing full well that they would refuse. Such an option could not even be seen as prudent now.

 

Many of the reinforcements Yukimura brought with him were mounted soldiers, either atop pegasi and Kinshi, or else, riding strange, clattering automatons. The tactician himself owned one such monstrosity, a large thing, almost the size of a horse, who's worn wooden frame and blackened gears were hidden by a dark green blanket. That didn't hide it's... _head_. An ugly, bloated red face with bulbous eyes and a hinged jaw that clacked with every choppy step it took. It looked like the whole thing would fall apart at any moment, but Yukimura insisted that it was quite sturdy- he had built it himself, after all.

 

The only options she had for passage was one of the flier's mounts, or the terrifying machine, and given how unstable she could be, flying was not a wise idea. Plavo, Silas' destrier, was aiding in transporting their supplies, having a sturdier frame than hollow boned pegasi, so the one method of travel she would've been comfortable with was no longer available. The seat on the massive puppet was much smaller than any kind of saddle she was used to, and due to the thing lacking any kind of solid covering over it's moving parts, she had to keep her feet in front of her, which in turn made it hard hold on to anything, not that there was anything in the way of reins. All in all, it was a terrible way to travel, to say nothing of the horribly uneven gait it “walked” with. No less than twice, she had to demand Yukimura stop in leading the automaton so she could lean over and vomit.

 

“I appologize for the bumpy ride, Nerrida-sama. I'm so accustomed to it myself, I often forget that others find it jarring.”

“Ugh, not so much 'jarring' as 'vomit inducing'.” The older man was silent for a moment, before turning his attention to her.

“I have something that may take your mind off things, at least a bit. There, in the saddlebag to your right.” Nerr frowned, reaching into the dark leather bag and pulling out what appeared to be a rather large book. On second glance it was clearly more of a book-shaped box, with a pull string on the side emulating the spine. There were gilded characters on the cover, letters she couldn't understand. Tilting it this way and that, she tried to figure out what exactly it was when a faint rustling sound from within caught her attention. Giving it another shake, it sounded almost like...

 

“Paper? Is there paper inside this?”

“Yes.” Yukimura said, smiling as he began leading the puppet forward once more. “You can slide the lid out to see what's inside.” More curious than she wanted to admit, Nerr saw that what appeared to be the cover was held in place with a latch. She unhooked it and pulled the top over, revealing a painting of a man and woman, both with long, dark hair and wearing Hoshidan robes, holding an infant between them. She stared at the picture, at the people it depicted. So _that_ was where Ryouma had gotten his wild mane from...

“This is...”

“Your parents, yes. That was back when you were a babe. If you pull on the rope on the side, it flips through the pictures.”

 

“I'm going to go out on a limb and assume _you_ made this...” She said as she tugged on the string. With a quiet “click-click-click”, the page, held in place by small rivets, was folded underneath the stack of papers, revealing the next. They were all of the same subject, Mikoto and Sumeragi and herself, barely recognizable as such, usually sandwiched between them. Ryouma and Hinoka, smaller and more delicate, appeared in some. They seemed like normal family outings; picnics, days at the shore, walking through markets... things she'd always dreamed of doing with her own family. One image portrayed her atop Sumeragi's shoulders, reaching up into a tree for some sort of pale, pinkish orange fruit. Having only heard the worst of Hoshido for so many years, she held in her mind an image of a stern, cold ruler- hard and unyielding... someone like Garon. The man with the wide smile in the picture did not fit in with her idea of a ruler, of a father.

 

“Indeed I did. I even painted the pictures. I often sketched the goings on in the castle- it was calming. When Mikoto-sama saw my work, she asked if I could compile some of them together for you and your siblings, so you would have something to look back on when you got older.” Yukimura sighed heavy, reaching under the dusty lens of his glasses to wipe at his eyes. “After you were taken... our empress couldn't bear to look at it, so she asked me to hide it somewhere. The truth is, I'd long given up hope that you would ever see it again.” Again... Nerr looked back down at the pictures, trying to conjure a memory, something, anything, even the tinniest fragment of the happy days depicted before her, but the longer she stared into the darkness of her mind, the more everything seemed to fade away. Breathing deeply, she slid the cover back in place, replaced the latch, and set the book back into the saddlebag carefully.

 

“You're a very talented artist, Yukimura. Would that I could draw so well...”

“Oh, it only take a bit of practice, milady. I recall you often enjoyed drawing when you were younger- enjoying what you do is the first step to becoming skilled at it.”

“I'll take your word for it.” She said quietly, turning her attention towards the trees that lined the path they took. They were beginning to grow sparser, further apart. In the distance, she could see houses set behind large fields, fallow and covered in snow. Would they come to life come spring, or would the gods be cruel this year? Bitterly, Nerr wondered if she wasn't the only person in the convoy that worried about things like that. Had the little girl in those pictures grown up as she was desired to, certainly she wouldn't care about it either.

000

 

It took two days to reach Windmire. They must've been closer than she had originally thought, given that it had taken her four days to get to the border from the capital. It looked as it had both the first and the last time she had seen it, six months ago. Winter had not yet started then, with the dry, cool of autumn still lingering. Soon, it would end, but the dirty streets would grow no less desolate. There were houses lining them, large stone mansions belonging to the nobles who kept court in Krakenburg. The streets had been empty when she'd gone through here before as well, but she knew there had to be a market around; after all, Gunther had gotten the Citadel's supplies from _somewhere_ , and he always said he was in Windmire.

 

The only thing that looked different now was that there were no soldiers stationed anywhere. They must all have been either guarding the castle, or out in Hoshido. Nerr wondered if any of the soldiers she had passed as she left to complete Garon's first mission had been stationed at the Chevois border; had she watched any of the men and women who had bowed to her, calling her “princess” and wishing her good luck on her journey, fall while she stood by and did nothing? She shook her head, trying to clear it. Ryouma inspected the capital with a deep frown on his face.

 

“So this is Windmire?” He seemed to be asking her directly.

“I can only assume. After all, the point on the map where we're currently standing says 'Windmire' on it, unless you were holding it upside down and we're in Sonnetanz. If you're unsure, ask Scarlet.” The older man shook his head, looking around again.

“No, she isn't familiar with the capital.”

“And you think _I_ am?”

“The castle is so close; I assume you've come here in the past.”

 

“You assume wrong.” She said, perhaps a bit more harshly than was called for. “I didn't live in the castle, I live out there. In the mountains.” She pointed to the foggy peaks in the distance, just visible behind Krakenburg's spires. She could see the citadel perfectly in her mind's eye, tall and imposing and safe and happy... and never to be home again. “My... my retainer came out here for supplies, but I wasn't allowed to join him. He told me about it, though. I've only been here once. It seems more deserted than it should be.” Silas walked up to them, looking around as well. If she wasn't mistaken, he lived somewhere in the area. Maybe he could point out his house.

 

“There's probably a curfew in effect, what with our little 'invasion' and all.” Ryouma shook his head, his brows deeply furrowed.

“Curfew or not, this is almost as bad as that illusory Notre Sagesse. It's so empty and quiet here- completely devoid of life. It's hard to believe _this_ is the capital of a kingdom as large and powerful as Nohr.”

“Believe it.” The cavalier said, his voice bitter and eyes dark. “Most Nohrian cities and villages, especially this far north, have been this way for decades. When the famine strikes, the crime level rises, and so does the death toll. Fortunately, there hasn't been a plague for years now, but that could change at any moment- they usually come about when people are hungry. Anyone who's not capable of defending themselves just stay indoors- that way, they won't be killed by brigands or feral Faceless... or get caught up in riots.” Nerr remembered something he had told her a while ago.

 

“Where was that riot you were sent to break up before you came to Hoshido?” Silas pointed somewhere to the northwest of where they were.

“Over there. There's a bakery, but there wasn't enough bread and... well... people don't like being told they don't get to eat. About ten people were killed just from being trampled.”

“That's terrible... I bet your parents got worried when they heard you were involved in things like that.” The knight chuckled slightly.

“Yes and no. My mother almost had a stroke when she heard about it, but my father just got upset. He said I should be defending our home, not some peasant bakery. Such is the mindset of the aristocracy, I'm ashamed to say.” In firm contrast to their almost lighthearted banter, Ryouma looked horrified.

 

“Gods above, that's terrible! People killing each other... over _food?_ ” Nerr frowned, turning to look directly at him.

“Does it really come as that much of a surprise to you? _Wars_ are fought over food. Why do you think Garon is so hellbent on expanding the kingdom into Hoshido? Hardly any of our land in arable, especially this far north. I'm sure you and Scarlet never missed a meal in Chevalier, but this is the _real_ Nohr, where _real_ people are too weak from hunger to plan rebellions.”

 

“It's just like in the Woods of the Forlorn.” Silas' voice was soft as he looked up, where the stars were twinkling overhead in the clear, winter air. “The trees twisted and craned to suck up every little bit of light they could, but it still wasn't enough. That's Nohr in a nutshell. Food, resources, even light- there's never enough of anything. I'm not really the best person to talk about this; I come from a noble family, so we could afford to have things imported from further south, but... even I've had a _taste_ of what it's like to wonder when your next meal would be. Once, when I was little, I was at the Northern Citadel where Nerr lived, and we got snowed in by a sudden blizzard. It took almost two weeks before anyone could get to us; between four people, food runs out really quickly. I'd never been so hungry in my life- well, not until my endurance training.”

 

“Endurance training?” Nerr posited his answer.

“All Nohrian soldiers have to prove that they can survive with the bare minimum of food and sleep for a week before they can join the army. Most Nohrians are used to going without food- I know I am. It's the sleep part that gets to you...”

“Only the strong survive in Nohr. That's why we learned to fight and conquer other countries, so that we can make up for what we lack. So that we can survive.” Felicia approached them, smiling slightly as she looked around as well.

“My grandpa always used to say, 'the gods cursed us with these lands, but they blessed us with determination'. That's why all members of our tribe are taught to fight as children- so no one can take what we have.” Nerr could not help but smile a bit as well. It had been so long since she'd heard a kind word about her beloved kingdom anywhere outside her own mind. It was so nice to see she wasn't the only one who still felt a sense of pride in being Nohrian. It was clear that what Ryouma felt was not pride, though. Rather, he looked uneasy. It must've felt very wrong for him, coming into this place that seemed Shirasagi's equal yet opposite, a vision of what his own kingdom could have been had they not been lucky.

 

“Gods, that's-- that's terrible. Coming from the fruitful land of Hoshido, I had no idea things had been- things _could be_ \- this bad...”

“... _really_ , Ryouma?” She asked sardonically. “ **No** idea? No idea why Nohr has been locked in a feud with Hoshido for generations? _Basic_ Nohrian history regarding the east is 'to hell with those bastards and their excess!'- and you're _not_ making a good counterpoint for that. What does Hoshidan history say about us? That we're evil devil-worshipers who own demon harems and only fight Hoshido because we ran out of virgins to sacrifice?”

 

Even though she was being entirely serious, Felicia began giggling behind her hand, and even Silas snorted with undignified laughter. She rolled her eyes. This wasn't funny- it was a disgrace that the ruler of a country would even _admit_ to being so clueless. Nerr might have spent the last fifteen years of her life locked in a fortress, unable to so much as visit the city a few miles from her home, but even _she_ had been aware of both the state of her country and the neighboring land.

 

“I guess the burden of living in such a _'fruitful land'_ makes it impossible to spare a thought for anyone but yourself. That you would even say something like that; I ought to slap you!” Unlike past instances, where Ryouma would grow angry when she spoke to him in such a manner, he seemed to quail in the face of her disgust.

“It is nothing I'm proud of.” He said quietly. “When this war ends, we'll have to see what we can do about sharing our resources.” Many of the Hoshidan reinforcements began protesting loudly, some of the other royals joining in right alongside them.

 

“They lay waste to our country and you want to give them even _more!?_ ” Takumi exclaimed, his face livid.

“Haven't they taken enough from us already?” Hinoka added, scowling.

“ _We_ need our resources!”

“They're filthy anyan dogs!”

“I'd rather _burn_ our crops than give them to those monsters!”

 

“That is enough!” Ryouma yelled at his troops, quieting them down at once. “As the first prince, I will naturally ascend the Hoshidan throne. And my first priority as emperor will be revising our foreign policy towards Nohr. We have an abundance of food in Hoshido, more than we can even consume; why should our neighbors suffer while we live in excess?” Even though there was no grumbling, or audible discontent, it was clear almost no one from Hoshido was pleased with the news that they might have to share with Nohr. Silas broke the silence, his voice barely above a whisper.

 

“You're... going to be gracious enough to discuss trade with Nohr... after years of war... and making barriers to keep us out?”

“Of course.” The high prince smiled, relieved that _someone_ thought well of his plan... until the laughing started. It echoed through the deserted streets, probably terrifying anyone who heard it thinking it was raucous marauders. Felicia was holding her sides.

 

“That's hilarious!” Nerr kept switching back and forth between anger and hilarity.

“You think Nohr wants your table scraps, your _pity?!_ ”

“Nohr doesn't want anything but your _death!”_ Jakob scoffed contemptuously. Silas put on a high, mocking voice.

 

“ 'Oh, we're SOOOO rich we just throw our food away; let's give it to those filthy Nohrians like the dogs they are. Maybe if they're good, we'll give them a treat, too!' ” At once, the knight's demeanor changed, almost as angry as Nerr was. “Your father decimated our army with sneaky blitz attacks. Your mother created a freaking _BARRIER_ over your country so that when Nohrians went there to try and get food, they couldn't defend themselves from the lynch mobs that murdered them. And now you're just going to waltz in and make everything right for us poor barbarians by showing how kind and merciful you are--”

 

“ _After_ you lead an attack to kill the king, because regardless of what your intentions actually _are_ , that's how it will be construed.” Jakob said, his voice cold. “Yes, the people of Nohr will throw a parade in your honor, I'm sure.” Felicia finally stopped laughed, shaking her head as she tried to catch her breath.

“Prince Ryouma, if you repeated _ANY_ of that to a crowd of Nohrians, they'd stone you to death. That was the most condescending, belittling thing I'd ever heard in my life! I'm on _your_ side, and I'm kinda tempted to pick up a rock...”

 

The Nohrian princess laughed humorlessly. If someone had told her that as a joke, she wouldn't have found it amusing. The nerve of this man, thinking he could swoop in and play the savior. Who did he think he was talking about? If there was only one thing Nohrians had in excess, it was pride. Of course, pride always went before the fall, but nonetheless... A sudden thought struck her, beyond how open to the whole idea of sharing the Hoshidans seemed.

 

“When you tell the Norhians how merciful you are, Ryouma, be sure to lead with that massacre of the border guards in Chevalier. That'll _really_ convince them to trust Hoshidans...” Scoffing, she walked away from the group, needing a moment to clear her head and sensing that the dam holding back the Hoshidan's anger was about to burst. There was a slight creak of a door opening, but by the time she'd glanced in the direction it came from, a slam met her instead. Probably from that same door. As empty as it seemed, there had to be people in those houses. People who knew there was a war being fought out there, eyes that could peer outside and see it slowly marching up to their doorsteps...

 

Nerr shut her own eyes, reaching up to press the heels of her palms to her temples. She hadn't even known about any Nohrians being killed in Hoshido, but it made sense. Given the anger at the mere _thought_ of trading with the enemy, she could only imagine how Hoshidans would respond to actual Nohrians in front of them. And her mother's barrier had rendered Nohrians unable to fight- that surely meant “fight back” as well.

 

The east was undoubtedly crawling with people like Oboro, who would have gladly taken the opportunity to attack someone who couldn't do anything to stop them. She refused to believe Ryouma didn't know about that- if Silas knew, probably hearing it from other soldiers, then surely the heir to the kingdom himself must have known. Of course, when it spawned people like Hans and Iago, Nohr could be no better, but that did not make the prince's apparent condescension sting her ego any less.

 

As far as she was concerned, everyone needed to stop acting as though “peace” was some kind of reward for winning the war. _If_ there could be peace, and that was a big “IF” indeed, then it was something that maybe their _children_ could hope for, when there was time for some of the animosity between the countries to die down a bit. The smell of smoke, sweat, and cheap alcohol wafting from behind her was all the warning she had, but all the warning she needed to whip around, sword drawn. A man, somewhere in his thirties, stood behind her, his long green cloak frayed and patched in places. He smirked at her, the lines at the corners of her mouth and eyes deepening.

 

“Heh. You, uh... you're a quick one, huh?” He looked over to the others. “What do we have here? Couple of travelers, are you? Some Hoshidan caravan?” Nerr had never seen an actual vagrant, but she'd heard Xander complain about them harassing people in town enough to know one. Lowering her sword just a bit (you could never be too careful) she reached into her bag. She had brought some money with her from the citadel. It wasn't as if she ever got a chance to spend it herself, but Xander had given her an allowance any way, saying that it was customary for royals. She pulled out a handful of coins- perhaps too much to give a beggar, but soon, she would no longer have need for it- and handed it to him, feeling another migraine coming on.

 

“I'm paying you to go away, please. I've no interest in whatever sob story you call your own.” The man took her proffered money, taking a second to look it over, before tossing them in the air. She expected to see them disappear into the dirty snow at their feet, but he instead caught them. Every last one, his hand moving so fast, she could barely see. By now, the others had noticed whom she was talking to and approached. The man chuckled, his voice hoarse but pleasantly deep.

“Well, ain't you generous? But... this is the _bad_ part of town, kiddo. Pretty little girls like you shouldn't be walking around here without an escort.”

“Oh, really?” She drawled, tightening her grip on the Yato's handle.

“Really. You might run into some real bad characters. Not unlike... _us._ ” Oh, that was just fucking fantastic. The princess was so utterly exhausted, not just with the pile of annoyances growing larger by the hour, but life itself.

 

“...lemme guess; you're a brigand, and--”

“Yep. We're surrounded.” Takumi finished her thought for her. The smell of other people grew more intense, the odor of unwashed bodies and halitosis almost overwhelming. She could see them lurking in the shadows of the alleys, their clothes ragged and filthy, leering grins on their smudged faces. She reached up with her free hand, pinching the bridge of her nose to try and alleviate the pressure building in her skull.

“...I don't have the energy for this bullshit...”

“The hell are you mumbling about?” The brigand, who must've been their leader, judging by his slightly more hygienic appearance, barked at her. His voice, nice though it may have been, cut through her like a large knife.

 

“I said I don't have the energy for your bullshit!!” She screamed, lunging at him, bringing her sword down hard. It would've cut a large slit into him from shoulder to hip if it had connected. It seemed his body was just as nimble as his hands, though, for he ducked out of the blade's path before it could make contact.

“Shit! Heh... you've got some spunk. I like that. Now, we can make this nice and easy. Just give us all your valuables- including that fancy looking sword there--” He barely had time to pull back as the sword arced towards his face. Nerr found herself spinning from the momentum of her swing, and it took a moment to right herself.

“Come and get it, you putrid _cunt!_ I swear to the gods, I will eviscerate you!” Perhaps it had been because she charged at their leader, or maybe, some signal had been given, but regardless of the reason, the brigands all descended on them at once. Of course, given that they were going up against trained soldiers rather than merchants or sightseers, their attacks were met with retaliation. Axes and swords fell upon naginatas and katanas.

 

One unlucky swordsman stepped in Kagerou's path, and cried out in agony as a long kunai lodged in his face, deep in the hollow of his cheek. He barely had time to try and pull it out before another one cracked his skull right between the eyes. He was dead before he hit the ground. An archer had gotten off several lucky shots, many of the reinforcements crying out as arrows pierced their legs and stomachs, but alas, she found herself on the wrong side of Hinata's blade, the awkward angle he swung at cutting a large strip of flesh from her arm before he managed to thrust the curved blade in her gut.

 

The gray slush at their feet quickly began turning a dirty red. Nerr herself was far less interested in dealing with the underlings, and more concerned with finding their swineshagging leader. Still, when she noticed Orochi trying to cast a spell while dodging the wild swings of a berserk fighter, she stepped in, her gleaming sword cutting through the thick, coiled muscles across his back so deeply, she could see the faintest hint of the bones of his vertebrae through the blood there. The bandit barely had time to begin screaming before his spine was severed, cutting his scream short and dropping him to the filthy snow.

 

Breathing hard, the princess whirled around the moment she heard shuffling behind her, nearly bringing her blade down on Felicia, who was parrying another swordsman. The maid nimbly hopped out of the way of a heavy, but slow, strike, dashing to close the gap between them and drive her knife in to his throat. There was a wet gurgle as the thief choked on his own blood, though he stopped choking the moment the peach-haired girl dragged the knife to the side, slitting his throat straight through. With only a few shreds of skin and muscle to hold it upright, his head tilted back, allowing hot blood to flow out thickly, quickly saturating his dirty arming coat.

 

She could just imagine people watching the skirmish from their windows, looking on in horror and disgust, yet unable to turn away. Watching people die was a popular pastime in Nohr, after all. Public executions were considered wholesome family entertainment. She was pulled from her thoughts by the sound of whistling wind. Looking up, where the sound was coming from, she barely had enough time to duck her head and cover it with her arms. A barrage of tiny arrows fell upon them, hitting both the soldiers and brigands. Several of the small projectiles penetrated her sleeves and the tender flesh beneath, causing her to keen loudly in agony. She never dreamed she could miss vambraces so much, mostly because she never imagined there would come a time when she entered a battle without them.

 

Panting and groaning slightly, she lowered her arms, sheathing the Yato. Every movement hurt as the muscles contracted around the shafts of wood tearing into them. She grabbed hold of one lodged in her right forearm and, with a shaking hand, slowly pulled it out. It was slow going, given that she was not very dexterous with her left hand, and the fact that the muscle gripped the arrow even tighter as she unconsciously tensed in agony. Crying out as she finally pulled it loose, she threw the bloody stick to the ground, glaring at it. There were more, but that one, stuck just below her elbow, had been what was stopping her from moving. She did not have a physician's grasp on anatomy, but she knew there were major blood vessels in the arms, and didn't want to risk dislodging something that was keeping her alive. In the distance, she could see a large tower, some type of ballista. She knew those were stationed in cities prone to attacks to allow soldiers to drive back marauders. The nerve of these bandits... Gritting her teeth and trying to ignore the pain shooting up her arms, she charged forward.

 

She cried out as flames exploded near the left side of her face, singing her hair and blistering the skin there. A sorcerer in shabby robes held an old tome, flipping it to a new page and channeling her magic as the filthy snow at her feet glowed. Growling, Nerr pivoted, turning her attention on the mage. Not weighed down by bulky armor or weapons, the brigand managed to avoid her first strike. The second was cut short by an arrow grazing her shoulder. The bandit's leader kept his bow raised as he pulled another arrow from the quiver he wore at his waist. As riled up as she was, that struck the princess as odd; Nohrian archers always kept their quivers on their backs. Only Hoshidans wore them at their waist.

 

“Why don't you just back away slowly, little girl? Nobody needs to get hurt here.”

“Nobody but _you!_ ” She snarled, lunging at him. He managed to bring his bow up in time to block her sword, the thick steel holding her blade at bay, but that was only a minor inconvenience. The princess drew back just enough to unlock the Yato, before aiming further down and thrusting the golden sword at the brigand's gut. She expected to hear him cry out in pain, to see blood bloom over his dirty gray shirt, but again, his quick reflexes caught her off guard. He knocked her sword aside with his bow once more, flipping back- flipping!- to put distance between them. The only people she had ever seen move like that on the battlefield were shinobi (and herself, but even then, it flew in the face of everything she had been taught). This was no random marauder- he was too disciplined.

 

“What the fuck are you?” She spat.

“That's what I should be asking _you!_ ” He sneered back, notching an arrow and aiming it at her face. “You're no tourist. What are you, huh? A soldier?”

“That's exactly what I am!” She had taken no more than two steps towards him when another fireball ignited in front of her, causing her to stumble.

“Stay away from him, you crazy bitch!” The sorcerer yelled at her.

 

“I am SO sick of you!” Nerr once again turned her attention to the mage, grabbing a fistful of the threadbare cloak she wore (it wasn't as if there was much else to grab hold of) and dragging her to the ground. Still gripping the Yato tightly, she punched the other woman repeatedly in the face, not stopping until she heard the crack of cartilage snapping and teeth breaking at the roots. She dropped the bandit, who fell limply in the snow, moaning weakly. Her glove was smeared with blood, the rich metallic tang filling her nose. Turning to the white-haired man, she popped her knuckles. “Now, I'm going to do the same thing to you.”

 

“H-hey, wait a minute!” There was a hint of panic in his eyes as he dropped his arrow, raising a hand to either try and hold her off, or else, wordlessly ask for mercy. Unfortunately, he'd already rejected her one offer of peace. “If you're a soldier, what the hell are doing with Hoshidan nobles? You some merc squad they hired to keep them safe? Fuck 'em! What have Hoshidans ever done for _us?_ You're on the wrong damn side!” The longer he spoke, the more enraged he seemed to become. For _us_ , he had said- well, that threw her theory of him being a Hoshidan shinobi out the window. Even so, his words resonated with her, _you're on the wrong damn side!_ That was what she had been telling herself for months, but at the moment, it was neither here nor there.

 

“I _know_.” She told him coldly, stepping closer. He seemed to lower his guard, perhaps thinking that he had gotten through to her and she would cease her attack. He was so very wrong, which he quickly learned from the blade pressed to his throat. “But this is personal. I offered you kindness, and you spat it back in my face... I am SICK of people doing that!!!” While the brigand was trying to figure out a way to escape her blade with his neck intact, Nerr drove her foot into his gut, staggering him. One solid blow was all she needed, and the flat edge of the Yato smashed into the side of his head.

 

With an almost comical grunt, the older man fell back into the snow. Among the other brigands, those still alive and not cornered by the Hoshidans, their leader's defeat seemed to spread like a ripple. At once, the fighting stopped, or at least, quickly became one-sided. The thieves scattered, disappearing back into the shadows of the alleys. Some of the Hoshidans gave chase, but even they quickly decided to count the battle as won. On the ground, the man groaned, and despite the unsightly goose egg forming on the side of his head and the blood staining his dirty hair, he tried to get up. Nerr scowled and sheathed her sword, walking closer to him and stepping hard on his chest.

 

“Oof! Haah... haah... you ain't as- ugh- light as you think, girlie...” Kneeling down, she ensured her knee was digging painfully into his sternum before punching him in the face.

“Don't worry.” Punch. “You won't have to endure it.” Punch. “Much longer _._ ” PUNCH. Her knuckles stinging even through her glove, she grabbed a hank of his curls, noting the dark brunette ones amidst the otherwise cloud of white, and pulled his head up out of the snow. “I tried to be nice. I tried to _help you_ , and _this_ is how you repay me?” Groaning, he turned his head to the side, spitting out a mouthful of blood. When he spoke, it was with a slight lisp, indicating that he had bitten his tongue.

“Shit, if I'd known you were some crazy-ass merc, I'd have taken your coin and left. You can't blame me for seeing a mark and thinkin' 'payday'...” She assumed by “mark” he meant “victim”. The sound of feet sloshing through the half melted snow behind her wasn't enough to draw her attention away from the dastard before her, and neither was Ryouma's voice.

 

“Good job, Nerrida. We've rounded up the other brigands that didn't escape.” The high prince sneered down at the man she was currently using as a cushion. “You're the leader of this pathetic gang, are you not? Hmph. Well, we'll tie him up as well. The fewer people who know we're here, the better.”

“...you _know_ these houses have people in them, right? I'm pretty sure we already had an audience.” From some of the higher windows, the curtains were pulled back just enough for shining eyes to be seen through, eagerly watching a fight that they felt could not harm them, locked away safely as they were.

“Indeed, and your performance was magnificent.” The man laughed under his breath, before sighing deeply and closing his eyes, an almost tangible weariness settling over him. “Gods, just kill me if you're going to kill me...”

“With pleasure.” Nerr sneered, unsheathing her Yato. Clearly, kindness would get her nothing but a knife in the back. That knowledge had been carved in stone upon her mind. She raised the blade over her head, intending to drive it right through the man's throat, but a light touch on her wrist stilled her hand. Azura was standing behind her, frowning down at the brigand.

 

“Hold a moment, Nerr. As a thief, this... _man_ might know something about the secret passageway into the castle.” Ryouma's brows furrowed in confusion.

“What passageway?”

“It's... it's something I've always remembered about the day I was kidnapped from Nohr. I was... walking outside, in one of the courtyards, when suddenly, these men appeared from nowhere. They grabbed me and pulled me into some kind of tunnel.”

“I-- I didn't realize that was how it happened...” The high prince looked away from his sister, guilt writ on his face. The brigand, too, was looking up at Azura, but with an expression that bordered on... fear. The songstress shuddered slightly, but continued speaking, turning her attention to the silhouettes of Krakenburg's barbicans.

 

“It must've been made when the castle was first constructed, either to evacuate people or else, for servants to go through the castle undetected. I sincerely doubt King Garon would care enough to seal it off.” She turned back to the man lying in the snow. “Do you know anything about this, thief?” He chuckled darkly.

“I know lotsa stuff.”

“Then you must tell us! It is imperative we reach the castle!”

“Psh! Or what- you'll kill me? Go ahead, bitch, make my day. This is _Nohr_ ; I'm not beholden to fucking Hoshidans. You want something, you pay the price.”

 

Loathe as Nerr was to admit it, a way of getting into the castle undetected would be a godsend. The thought of giving the ungrateful maggot below her anything but several more punches to the face and/or gut made her stomach churn, but sometimes, people had to do things they did not want to get what they needed. She had been taught that early on as a child. Reluctantly, she climbed off his chest, roughly grabbing his arm and tugging him up as well. Her arms burned with every twitch where the arrows were still lodged in them.

 

“How much do you want?”

“That's what I'm talking about. Everything these Hoshidan fucks have. I'm assuming they're loaded; why else would Nohrian mercenaries be catering to hoity-toity byak snobs?” She was almost tempted to tell him she wasn't a mercenary, but what was the point? Who would believe she was a princess, as filthy and disheveled and maimed as she was? She probably looked more like a brigand than him. Ryouma crossed his arms over his chest, scowling at the man, who smirked back at him.

“...very well.” The prince closed his eyes, sounding like every bitter word he spat out was torn from him under duress. “Money is no object to us. If your motivations are so base and pathetic, we can bury you in coin. On my honor as High Prince of Hoshido, you'll be paid at the first opportunity.” The thief's eyes widened, his jaw slightly agape.

 

“Wait... what did you say? ' _High Prince of Hoshido_ '?” Ryouma glared daggers at him.

“That's right. I am Ryouma, heir to the throne of Hoshido. I shall ascend the throne as soon as the war ends. At that time, I will grant you as much money as your pathetic little mind can comprehend.” Both Nerr and Takumi behind her cringed at his words, through presumably for different reasons.

“Gods, you just can't open your mouth without being condescending today, can you?”

“Um, nii-san? Do you _really_ think it's a good idea to announce who you are to some random thug on the street? To say nothing of promising him practically our entire coffer...” The one thing she actually _liked_ about her younger brother was that at least _he_ had enough sense to see the pragmatic side of things (most of the time). Unfortunately, despite everything that had happened thus far, Ryouma still seemed to think that charging headlong into things was a good idea.

 

“He has information that could save us invaluable time. We have no choice. ...Although, I suppose we haven't tried interrogation. That's the traditional Nohrian method, yes?” The brigand gaped at the prince for a long time, before bowing lowly, a wide smile on his face.

“Why didn't you say who you were sooner, milord? …deal's fucking OFF!”

“What?!” Straightening, the older man snarled at the Hoshidan prince, every line on his face etched deeper with hatred.

 

“You can keep your fucking money, _Ryouma-sama_ ; I'm not telling you _shit!_ I knew you haughty bastards were the scum of the earth, and this proves it! Like father, like son, after all. Every word outta your fuckin' mouth has been an insult, then I'm supposed to be impressed because you're _royalty?_ No. Hell no. I don't mind taking coin from snobby nobles and uppity merchants, but even _I've_ got standards. You can rot in Hell!” Well, _that_ should've come as a surprise to no one, but it certainly surprised the Hoshidans. They all glared at the thief, some of them even hurling curses at him. Nerr could hardly blame him for being upset over Ryouma's thoughtless words, but unfortunately, they still needed his help. As the man began walking away, she dashed to cut him off.

 

“Wait wait wait! I know Ryouma is a jackass, and I'm sorry he doesn't think Nohrians are people like him, but you've got to help us! If this is about me punching you, you can punch me and we'll call it even!”

“Do not appologize on my behalf, Nerrida. I've done nothing wrong.” He stalked up to the thief, though his glare was less impressive given that he was several inches shorter than the Nohrian man. “What is the meaning of this? I said you'd be compensated!” For a long time, the brigand stared down at the prince before him in silence, before laughing and shaking his head in disbelief.

 

“Gods, you are so clueless, it hurts. Your ignorance _physically_ pains me. Living under a magic bubble will do that to a person... Guess you wouldn't know me. I am of the Ashyura clan. My family once served yours.”

“Wait, _what?_ You're _Hoshidan?_ ” Nerr was taken aback by his words. So she had been right the first time. But that made no sense, how could someone from a family of royal retainers end up a thief in Nohr? The Ashyura man nodded grimly, his mouth set in a thin line.

 

“In a sense. I am a ninja of Kouga... a land that exists only in memory, now...”

“Kouga... That's a name I haven't heard for many, many years.” At once, the older man grew enraged once more.

“Yeah, I'll fucking bet! What does the emperor care that his people are being raped and slaughtered as long as his worthless ass is nice and comfortable on his throne?”

“You will not speak of my father that way!” Ryouma yelled, his eyes blazing, but his anger was nothing compared to the hatred before him.

“Oh yeah? Try and stop me. I'm _glad_ that miserable piece of shit is dead. I'd go back to Hoshido just to spit on his grave.” It was a very strange thing, to hear someone speak so meanly of her birth father, but clearly, this Ashyura man was angry for a reason. She turned to Hinoka, who was fuming.

 

“What are they talking about?” She asked in a low whisper. “Where's Kouga?” The older princess huffed through her nose.

“It bordered Mokushuu. It was a small prefecture renowned for it's ninja dojos... until it was burned to the ground. Now, that territory belongs to the Mokushuujin- nothing remains of the original Kouga.” Nerr could not stop the gasp that escaped her lips. She expected Hinoka to say she didn't know, that the thief was some raving lunatic. They had passed through Mokushuu... when had they unknowingly stepped into Kouga? Had they walked over people's graves and not even realized?

“Gods above, that's the worst thing I've ever heard in my life... Why didn't the royal family step in to help? Even if you were at war with Nohr, surely _some_ soldiers could've been spared to keep a whole _demesne_ from being destroyed!”

 

“Why, indeed...” Ashyura seethed quietly. “My father, the daimyo, _begged_ Sumeragi for aid to help keep Kotaro's dogs at bay. He pleaded with the emperor until the flames reached out home... But nobody came. Nobody except the Mokushuujin. The day Kouga fell, almost all of my people were slaughtered, including my parents- at least, the lucky ones were. I still remember the living being strung up in the trees, kicking and screaming... I was a child... chased from my homeland and separated from the other survivors. Even as a refugee, I was denied entry to Shirasagi, the one place I thought I could be safe from those monsters...! So I wound up in Nohr, exiled and alone.”

 

Nerr turned away from him, shutting her eyes and wishing she could shut her ears as well. Evil... that was nothing but pure evil. She recalled the pictures she had seen of her father, the smiling man surrounded by his children... A man who left children who weren't his to rot in the gutter. She tried to imagine the brigand as a child, perhaps with all black curls and wearing Hoshidan robes, running up the stairs to Castle Shirasagi with tears in his eyes, only for those massive doors to slam shut in his face. Her eyes were burning. Gods, was it so much to ask to have a father who didn't make her sick?

 

“Hey. What's wrong with you?” His words sounded like an accusation, and she cringed slightly. ' _My father is the reason your parents are dead- that's what's wrong with me...'_ A cold hand rested on her shoulder, and she opened her eyes just in time to see Felicia leaning towards her, concern in her large blue eyes.

“Lady Nerr... Are you crying?” She pulled away from the girl, but there was nowhere she could turn where someone wasn't staring at her. Takumi scoffed in exasperation.

 

“You _are_ crying! What the hell?” Frowning, she angrily fisted away the tears that overflowed.

“I'm sorry that it hurts my heart to think of what a _bastard_ Emperor Sumeragi was! How can anyone _do_ such a thing? How can someone turn their back on a _child?!_ How can anyone be such a _monster?!_ Even King Garon wouldn't turn a child off his doorstep!!” Despite all his faults, that fact could not be contested- she knew full well that was how Jakob came to be in her employ. Anger, misery... and pity roiled inside her, making her sick.

 

That probably wasn't even a one time occurrence- if one Hoshidan territory had been swallowed up by another, it probably happened other times as well. Maybe Kazeho hadn't originally been as sprawling as it was now- maybe _both_ her parents just turned a blind eye to the suffering of their people, so long as it wasn't _Nohrians_ causing it... She could feel eyes boring into her, and shuddered. That Ashyura man probably thought she was a madwoman. Maybe she was- maybe it was mad to wish she could've hugged the little boy he was before he grew into the man now staring at her. She felt guilty now, for attacking him. Even though what kindness she offered apparently wasn't good enough, did _anything_ really make up for such cruelty? She should've just given him the stupid Yato- it wasn't as if _she_ wanted it. But the damn thing would probably fly right back into her hand like it always did... Perhaps it was her excess of emotion, or perhaps he too felt the shame of realizing the cruelty his father was capable of, but Ryouma was no longer as arrogant as he had been at the start of the exchange. He looked ill, his eyes downcast as his hands trembled slightly.

 

“I am sorry. For your people, your troubles, and that you were unable to find safe haven in Hoshido. I wish I could justify my father's actions, but I cannot, nor should I.” He looked up at the older man, his face miserable, but earnest. “When this war is over, I will do all I can to help your people reclaim your homeland. There's just one condition. Join us! Join us and help fight to keep Nohr from taking Kouga a second time. We can make our world a better place!” For a moment, Ashyura seemed to take the prince's words into consideration, but his expression quickly darkened.

“Ryouma-sama... you can take your 'help' and shove it up your ass. You think I'm gonna help you invade the country that gave me asylum? You think I'm gonna lose any sleep now that _your_ people are the ones being raped and butchered like mine were? You're even worse than Sumeragi...” He sneered. “At least he was _open_ about not caring. Your 'after the war' promises make me sick!” This time, it seemed he was leaving for good. Well, it wasn't as if they could really expect anything from him. Nerr felt the skin on her cheeks tighten as the tears there dried. She could barely feel them, as cold as it was.

 

“...I know this probably won't mean much to you, but... Kotaro of Mokushuu. is dead.” The retreating footsteps stopped.

“...what?”

“We killed him a few months ago. It was just because he was trying to kill us, but... hopefully, the souls of your people can rest easier knowing that whoreson is rotting in hell.” It wasn't enough. It wasn't anywhere _near_ enough. If anyone had told her what he had done, Nerr would've torn that smug bastard limb from limb. Gods, why hadn't anyone told her? If there was one thing she could not stand, it was being kept in the dark. They probably assumed that if she had known that Hoshido was every bit as wicked as she had been taught it was, she would've run back to Nohr, consequences be damned. Oh, if only she'd known... The filthy snow sloshed as someone approached her, and she blinked in surprise at the sight of a dirty, wet olive-green cloak.

 

“...y'know, for a crazy, psycho bitch, you're alright, kid. Tell ya what, I'll show you where the tunnel is.” Sniffling, she looked up. Ashyura was looking down at her, his expression inscrutable, but not nearly as hateful as it had been when he'd ranted at Ryouma.

“You know I'm with them, right?”

“Yeah, I know. But anyone who'd kill that son of a bitch has my support. The enemy of my enemy, and all that shit. You can call me Shura, by the way.”

“...alright, Shura. Thank you.” A sense of relief passed over the group, though many of the Hoshidan soldiers were still visibly angered that someone would speak so ill of their deceased ruler. As far as Nerr was concerned, if Sumeragi had wanted people to praise him in death, he should've done more praiseworthy things in life. She wondered if people would be so protective of Garon's memory if-slash-when he died. Azura approached them, smiling ever so slightly.

 

“Indeed, thank you for your help, Shura. I-- I'm very sorry for your losses.”

“I don't think you'd be that sorry if you recognized me, girl.” The singer frowned, her thin brows furrowing.

“I don't-- what do you mean?”

“You don't know who I am, do you? Well... I know who _you_ are, Princess Azura.”

“H-how do you--?” Shura sighed deeply, his head bowed.

 

“I thought, since you knew I knew about that tunnel, that you recognized me, but clearly, that's not the case. I should probably keep my mouth shut, but... this has been eating at my conscience for fifteen damn years.” He looked up at her, his dark eyes tortured. “I was one of the people hired to kidnap you. Don't get me wrong; I'm no baby snatcher- I just led the shinobi who did the dirty work, but... that doesn't make me any less guilty.”

“That was you...?” Azura asked shakily, her hands trembling as she lifted them to cover her quivering lips. Nerr felt sick to her stomach. She knew the other princess had been kidnapped- she'd said as much during their first meeting, but for some reason, it never really struck her what that actually entailed. Perhaps it was because Azura seemed so happy in Hoshido that it was hard imagining men creeping through the shadows and grabbing a little girl, covering her mouth to keep her from screaming. What must've been going through her mind when that happened? Nothing good, no doubt... The Nohrian girl turned back to Shura, breathing hard.

 

“Who hired you? Was it Empress Mikoto?” She remembered her mother's smiling visage; had a demon really lurked behind that angelic countenance? The older man shook his head, white curls bouncing as he did so.

“Nah, it was some royal strategist, what was his name...?”

“Yukimura?” She supplied in a bitter whisper. The thief snapped his fingers.

“That's it! That was that smarmy, four-eyed sumnabitch. He even came with to make sure I was telling the truth, but he made damn sure to get out before he paid me the rest of my money. Gods, what I wouldn't give to see him again and let him know exactly how displeased I was with his employ...”

“That might be arranged.” The Nohrian girl said coldly- was there no one who hadn't wronged this man?

 

Even someone as unassuming as Yukimura was capable of being heartless and cruel.... Did he draw any pictures for Azura after he stole her away from her home, she wondered. And really, could her mother _not_ have known what happened under her nose? Did she think Azura simply showed up on their doorstep one day? No, she had to have known, that was the whole reason the singer had been taken to Hoshido in the first place- to use as a 'bargaining chip', in her own words. Nerr looked back up to the other princess. Her face appeared as stoic as ever, but every time she blinked, more tears leaked from her eyes, dripping onto the mantle she wore. Biting her lip and wondering if she was doing the right thing, she reached out, resting her hand on the other girl's shoulder.

 

“Azura. Are you alright? I can't imagine how you must feel right now...”

“Oh, I think you can understand better than most, Nerr.” The songstress sniffled, wiping her eyes on her sleeve. “I'll be fine. It's in the past. Anyway, we should probably get going.”

“That's it?” Shura asked, his voice slightly incredulous. “You're not gonna scream at me, call me a monster, get mad for ruining your life?” Azura shook her head.

 

“You did less damage than you think. And of all the people I can blame, I believe you are at the bottom of that list. I don't remember much, but... I do recall that one of my kidnappers was significantly younger than the rest. That was you, wasn't it? Deplorable as it may be what some will do for coin- or what some will pay people to do...” She added in a low, bitter tone. “I can't begrudge someone who has nothing taking what little they can get. Perhaps if Hoshido had been kinder to you, our paths never would have crossed.” The older man remained silent, his face grave. When he finally spoke, his words were accompanied with a respectful bow.

“You are very kind, milady. I thank you, for your understanding if not forgiveness.”

 

“It's fine.” She replied shortly. Being the center of attention was clearly making her uncomfortable. “Now, please, take us to the passageway. With your help, we might gain the advantage we need to defeat King Garon.”

“...okay then, as long as we're clear that I'm only helping in the capacity of gettin' you in the tunnel- Nohr's been too good to me to actively assist in any regicide.”

“Your... loyalty is commendable.” Ryouma said quietly, though it was clear from the bitterness in his gaze that he wished that loyalty was directed towards Hoshido instead. Shura willfully ignored him, scanning the area quickly before dashing towards one of the nearby alleys.

 

“You folks ready to get movin'? We kicked up enough dust that some sentries will be pokin' their noses around any second. I'll lead you to the underground, and from there, we enter the tunnel. Hope you're vaccinated; the real Nohr's got everything you could want and then some...” Wryly, Nerr wondered what disease could possibly put her through her paces more than everything else she'd already endured in the last six months. Even now, her sleeves were soaked through with blood. A shudder coursed through her as she took one last look at Krakenburg from afar. Soon... soon, there would be no more wistful gazes. Only vengeance.

000

 

(Rant Time; I apologize in advance) I don't remember what this chapter is called in the game, because I always call it “The Ryouma Circle-Jerk”. That's what it is. That's _all_ it is. The entire chapter exists to show what a wonderful, merciful god Ryouma (and by extension, Hoshido as a whole) is. I've said it before, and I'll say it again- as far as I'm concerned, everything west of the Chasm, even Chevalier, is part of Nohr because it makes no sense otherwise. Which means that every rout map you play is Ryouma leading the slaughter of the brave Nohrian men and women who are defending their country. And I say Ryouma because what idiot would think he _wasn't_ in charge? He and Xander were clearly meant to be the lord characters, and IntSys's marketing decided that the game needed more fan service-y pandering and made an avatar that already existed to treat the player as an idiot into one the stupidest, most clueless character the script has to offer. Would _anyone_ in Fateslandia think a mentally deficient humonculous like Corrin, who's plans always seem to be “charge into everything headlong no matter how much the odds are stacked against your paltry handful of soldiers”, could lead an army? I think not.

Remember how Ylisseans treated Emmeryn when she became Exalt and started trying to help them? Imagine what they would've done if _Gangrel_ had been the one offering help, _especially_ after the war ended the second time. Awakening, for all it's faults, showed people reacting (for the most part) in a realistic way to the things going on around them; with anger, and depression, and suspicion. And, let's be frank here- there's no way in _HELL_ Hoshidans are going to be okay with giving aid to the country that's been trying to conquer them, that murdered both of their previous rulers, and kidnapped a royal. It's not going to happen. This in-game chapter makes it canon that Hoshido gives dick all about anyone who's not them- Shura blatantly says “even as a refugee, I was denied entry to Hoshido”, which I changed to “Shirasagi”, because everything is Hoshido. But still- he was a fucking _child!_ That means that either Sumeragi is exactly as much of a dick as he is in 'Revelation' (which seems likely, since Anankos' influence only _amplifies_ a person's natural flaws, and Fuuga admits that Sumeragi was kind of a raging d-bag; I know it says “prankster” in the localized version, but originally, he was a pugnacious little man-whore), or else, Mikoto is a cold hearted bitch depending on who was ruling at the time, but either way, it explicitly undermines the notion of Hoshido being some great utopia. Ryouma even admits that there are rebel groups against Hoshido when you're back in Chevalier- why would people rebel against you if you're so great? He hasn't done anything to get excited over but make big promises, and the problem with promises is that they're cheap and easily broken. I'm certain some Ryouma fan girl is gonna tear me a new one for being mean to their husbando, but I don't care- I call it as I see it, and I'm calling bullshit on this entire chapter of the game.


	20. Made Your Mistakes

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Ch. 20- “Made Your Mistakes”

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_A/N- Sorrow courses throughout my veins; deep within my drenched heart, there's always rain..._

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Perhaps it was because she had always associated Nohr with desolation, but when she first stepped into Windmire's underground, Nerr felt like she had just walked into a different country. It was nowhere near as loud or crowded as Cyrkensia, but as far as she was concerned, Cyrkensia was just as foreign as Hoshido. Windmire was only about three hours from the Northern Citadel- it was home, it... wasn't supposed to be like this. They had entered a catacomb via a frayed rope ladder hidden deep in some dark alley, some place so inconspicuous, the only way a person could get there was if they knew where to look. The sound of rushing water hit her first, then the smell and noise. The sprawling marketplace looked more like a self-contained city than a bazaar. In fact, tucked away amidst the colorful displays, she could see what appeared to be cottages.

 

People actually lived down here, underground... considering that both the Northern Citadel _and_ Krakenburg were partially built in the earth, it shouldn't have struck her as odd, but Nerr assumed that was just something royals did. Normal people lived above the ground, not in the sewers. There were raised walkways on lining the channels through which murky water ran, it's surface foaming and strewn with debris, people crowding around shops. Chickens kept stacked in cages clucked as goats tethered to poles bleated loudly to passers by. The heady aroma of spices did nothing to mask the stench of cut meat and dead fish, for even if it had only just died that morning, the cavernous passage was not cold enough to ward off decay. Urine, alcohol, and pungent smoke settled over everything like a thin blanket, muffling some smells and exacerbating others. The Hoshidans all gazed around, some with mouths slightly agape, many with their noses wrinkled in distaste. Ryouma's expression was more that of disbelief.

 

“What... What is this place?” Shura, who had been leading them, turned around and smirked.

“Heh. I told ya; this is the _real_ Windmire- The Underground. Blue bloods don't even know about this place- if they did, they'd have burned it down decades ago, but I bet all their servants do. This is how the regular, salt 'o the earth folks get on around here.” As... unusual as it was, the longer Nerr took in the sights, the more they filled her with a sense of contentment, if nothing else. It wasn't perfect, not by any means. She could see what must've been pubs surrounded by unsteady men and women, some of them slumped over against the fronts of the establishments in a dead faint... hopefully. And milling about were others, in shabby clothes that seemed designed to be opened quickly, displaying their “wares” for discerning... customers. But debauchery was simply a part of life- drunks and whores were just as common in the royal court, if her siblings were to be believed. Aside from that, though, everything seemed normal, the people happy if one judged solely by their expressions at the moment.

 

“It's good to know that despite everything that's going on, there's still some normalcy to be found.” The thief nodded, his lips quirked up in a slight smile. It was clear that, despite where he was born, he dearly loved Nohr, which endeared him even more to the princess.

“This is the heart of the north- it's not going to shut down just because Hoshidans are invading. All that really matters to the people here is that it's relatively free from the prying eyes and ears of the king's spies.” He turned back to the Hoshidans. “Here you Hoshidans can get a real glimpse of what it means to be Nohrian. Only rich foreigners and idiots go upstairs if they don't absolutely have to. Heh... and they can keep Cyrkensia, too- this is _my_ Nohr.”

 

“...mine too.” Nerr said quietly. This must've been where Gunther got their supplies from, where he always used to go to get her little gifts when he was still a reservist. The thought brought with it less nostalgia and more sadness than she had anticipated, so she quickly forced the thought to the back of her mind, opting instead to take a closer look at some of the nearby stalls. One seemed to be selling health tonics and vulneraries, which they needed rather urgently, especially considering their destination. Behind her, Ryouma still seemed to be growing accustomed to the sight of civilization up in the grim north.

 

“This is encouraging. There is poverty, but aside from a few differences, this could be Shirasagi. ...perhaps if our people saw more of this and less soldiers and Faceless...” Nerr felt her lip curl at his muttered words. Her hearing may have been sharper than most, but the high prince would have to be completely deaf to not hear his own siblings complaining behind him. Takumi's major gripe was the smell, while Hinoka wondered if all Nohrians were lecherous drunks, or just the ones here. Sighing, she closed her eyes and reached up to rub her temples, wincing as her arms protested the movement. Her injuries were no longer bleeding, it seemed, but she really needed to deal with the fletchettes embedded in her flesh before they became infected. Given that they were walking about in a massive sewer, that could happen at any moment. A gravely voice beside her snapped her from her thoughts.

 

“Man, can you _get_ more idealistic than that?” Blinking in surprise, the Nohrian girl opened her eyes and looked up to see Shura jabbing a thumb in Ryouma's direction. For a moment, she thought he was talking about her. “This dumb ass thinks he's gonna charge into King Garon's chambers, demand peace, and everything's gonna be hunky-dory. I weep for Hoshido, being left in _his_ hands.”

“He means well.” Nerr said in earnest. For all his many faults, Ryouma wanted what he felt was best for his country, his people. The problem was, he lived in a fantasy world that would never line up with the reality of the situation he was facing, which the white-haired man laconically summed up.

 

“The road to hell is paved with good intentions. I dunno how the hell you and yours got caught up in their mess; you don't seem like some radical rebel.”

“I'm not.” She said tersely. “It's... it's a long story. Needless to say, we're just... heading in the same direction.” Never did Nerr think the day would come when she would not proudly proclaim who she was, but in this moment, being a mercenary was just so much easier than being a princess. Having no loyalties, no ties, no one to disappoint... Maybe she could just start over, make a new identity for herself. It seemed that Shura had done much the same thing, though by circumstance rather than any choice. His words brought to mind something she had been pondering since his sudden decision to aide them. “Why did you agree to help us? We attacked you; granted, after you tried to rob us, but still. You had no obligation to aid us. Clearly, there's no love lost between you and the Hoshidans.” His eyes grew darker, the lines around them etched deeper as though a storm cloud had appeared over him.

 

“Damn straight. But honestly... I did it more for you than them.” Perhaps he sensed the look she was giving him, because he quickly backtracked. “I don't mean in some weird, love-at-first-sight-bullshit kind of way- you _did_ try to kill me, after all. It's just... you cried for my people's plight. For a tragedy that happened well before you were born, probably. Not out of pity, just... compassion. No one-- no one has ever done that before...”

“I've always been prone to an excess of emotion- my brother always chided me for that fact.” The older man looked down, his expression still dark, though no longer as a result of anger, it seemed.

“Well, I think that 'excess of emotion' is a good thing to have. It helps to remember you're a human sometimes. Trust me, I know what kind of hell being a merc is. The things you gotta do for a fistful of coins... 's why I'm a thief; at least I'm my own boss.” There was a great deal she could say in response to that, but it was probably best that she keep her mouth shut until he lead them to the tunnel.

 

“I doubt I could handle the life of a thief. But again, thank you for you help- it is greatly appreciated. And I apologize for trying to murder you, even though you started it by trying to rob me after I willingly gave you money... ...it's nice having another Nohrian to speak to, at least for a while...” Shura frowned, perplexed by her sentiment.

“What about your squad? Clearly, the lot of you are Nohrian--”

 

“Never mind them.” She snapped. Squad... Scarlet and Jakob may as well have been Hoshidans for as much as she could talk to them, and Silas and Felicia... they seemed to enjoy one another's company more than hers as of late. Which was good. It was good for them, and she was happy that they were so fond of each other, and it was wonderful that love was blooming all around her, but that left her alone out in the cold with no one to speak to but strange Hoshidan-turned-Nohrian thieves. Raising his hands in defeat, though he smirked a bit, the older man backed off.

 

“Okay, okay. Jeez, touchy... ...say...” His eyes narrowed a bit as he studied her face. She instinctively turned away slightly. “You, uh... you look kinda familiar... like I might know you from somewhere. Did I ever do a job with you? 'Cause I kinda made a rule 'bout not workin' with pretty girls after Candice cucked me...”

“No.” Nerr responded tersely. Given that he had been in Krakenburg at at least one point in time to help kidnap Azura, it was possible that he had been there other times, perhaps to steal things. Which meant it was possible that he had seen the family portrait that her siblings told her hung on the wall in one of the expansive hallways. The last thing she wanted was somebody realizing who she was. Ryouma was still talking, insisting to his family and subjects that the two kingdoms had more in common than they realized, but she was not paying him much attention.

 

Further down the walkway, a young girl seemed to be stuck in an unpleasantly close conversation with a man who's leering eyes and touchy fingers made it clear that he was interested in buying something other than what she carried in her basket. The lecher reached out, pressing his hand flat against the peddler girl's small chest. Nerr hadn't even realized she'd unsheathed the Yato until she found herself forcefully stomping over the the small bridge where the altercation was taking place, but it seemed the girl knew how to handle herself well enough. She swung her basket hard, sending flowers flying and smacking the pervert across the face. He lost his balance and ended up toppling over into the water below. His head bobbed above the surface a few times as he tried to get out, but the current was too strong for him. The princess watched the dark shadow as it was tugged beneath and drifted past, not resurfacing again. That was encouraging. She would've expected the girl to be shaken up by the ordeal, but it seemed she was no worse for the wear, bounding up to Shura, who frowned down at her.

 

“Hi, hi~! Wanna buy a flower for your girlfriend, mister? I'll make you a special deal, heehee!”

“Not today, girlie. Bug off before some new pervert catches up with you.” He brushed her off, but despite her short stature, she would not be deterred, moving to stand in front of him as he tried to turn around to address the Hoshidans.

“Hey, that's mean! The least you could do is take a look! See?” She shoved the basket under his nose. Nerr had to smile a bit- the girl's persistence reminded her so much of-- “I have all different kinds! They're all so pretty and--”

“Elise?” She could not help the name from spilling from her lips. She knew that voice- half a year was hardly enough to make her forget her baby sister's dulcet, often implacable, tones. The girl lowered her basket slowly, looking at the older woman.

 

“...Nerr? B-big sister?” Large violet eyes widened in shock. “It is you! It's really you! What are you doing down here!?” Her loud voice drew the attention of the Hoshidans, and Nerr bit her lip, rushing over to pull her little sister to the side, stooping down so that her words could be more private. She wondered how she could have been so blind not to notice it at first, but in that moment, Elise looked no more like a princess than she herself did. Dressed in a plain woolen kirtle, her long hair was plaited in a single braid, rather than her customary twin twists, and partially concealed with a kerchief.

 

“I could ask you the same question, Elise. You're a princess! What are you doing selling flowers in the sewer? Without your retainers? And past your bedtime! Don't you realize how _dangerous_ this is!?” She hissed, feeling angry tears prick at her eyes. Gods above, it had been terrible to think of some random person who was no one to her being accosted by someone with untoward intentions. To realize that her beloved little sister had just been groped by some degenerate scum of the earth? She was tempted to jump into the fast running sewage and find his body, cutting off a few part just to make sure he didn't get the idea to try again. How could their siblings let this happen; how could Garon? The younger girl cowered slightly, and it was only then that Nerr realized she was shaking with rage. Elise averted her gaze, looking down at the basket she now clutched with both hands.

 

“I... I can't talk about it here. I don't want anyone to know. I've got a place just around the corner. Come with me and we'll talk there.” The older princess blinked, her mind blank.

“You've got... a place. Here. Underground, in the sewers... Am I-- am I having a stroke? What the fuck kind of upside down world did I just step into?” Fortunately, Elise giggled in response to her confused frustration, just like she always did. That much at least hadn't changed.

“Heehee! You worry too much, just like always. But I'm still so happy to see you!” She threw her arm around Nerr's neck, the basket hitting her arm and digging the arrow shaft there deeper into the flesh, drawing blood anew. She bit her lip until she tasted metal to keep from crying out in pain, and gingerly lifted her arms as well, wrapping them around the younger girl. Despite the setting, it was nice, a warm feeling settling over her, until Elise stiffened in her embrace. Nerr frowned and withdrew a bit, looking over her shoulder to see what her sister was staring at. Ryouma and the others had approached as well, most of them frowning. The high prince spoke up first.

 

“...you certainly seem to make friends quickly. Who is this, Nerrida?” Straightening, she turned to face her Hoshidan siblings directly.

“This is my little sister, Elise. She has some explaining to do, so I'll be accompanying her to... her 'place'.” Takumi's eyes narrowed as he took in the sight of the younger girl.

“That sounds like a trap waiting to be sprung. We're going with you, just in case--”

“NO!!!” The entire cavern seemed to echo with that scream. Elise, in stark contrast to her earlier warmth and jovial demeanor, was now glowering at the group opposite her, her teeth clenched and fists balled tightly. Nerr had never heard her sister sound so angry before. It was concerning. She reached out, lightly resting her hand on the younger girl's shoulder.

 

“Elise? What are you--”

“They can't come!” She pointed at Ryouma, eyes dark with anger... with hate. “They're not welcome here! No Hoshidans!!” As the word carried through the underground, it seemed that every other person there froze, looking around until their gaze settled on the group of foreigners. In only a matter of seconds, fearful whispering filled the air like a buzz.

 

“Hoshidans?”

“Hoshidans!”

“Oh gods, they're here!”

“I thought the soldiers would stop them!”

“They probably killed them, too!”

“It's the Hoshidans!!”

 

Panic spread out as people began to flee, knocking over displays and goods, shop keepers desperately trying to pack their wares up as quickly as they could. The fear seemed to be catching amongst the source of the panic as well, with some of the soldiers whispering that their position was compromised, that they needed to get out before soldiers _did_ come. Sakura, trembling slightly, huddled closer to Hinoka, who wrapped her arm protectively around her shoulders.

 

“Wh-wh-what's going on? Why is everyone s-scared of us?”

“Yeah, we're the good guys!” Hinoka declared, many of the other soldiers muttering in agreement. Shura scoffed loudly.

“To _whom?_ Word travels fast around here, unless there was _another_ group of Hoshidans that killed the border guards in Chevalier?”

“You all stay away from my house! Murderers aren't invited!” The color rose in Elise's cheeks as she continued glaring at the Hoshidans. Nerr couldn't stand seeing her so upset. Resting her hand atop the younger girl's head, she looked back up at her brother.

 

“Ryouma, you go with Shura and find out where that tunnel is, and maybe you can take the time to actually try and come up with a strategy. I'm going to go speak with Elise.”

“Nerrida, it may not be--”

“I'm not asking for your opinion _or_ permission, Ryouma!” She snapped, feeling her own anger surge. “I need to speak with my sister, and I'm not going to make her put up with you just because you still think all Nohrians are war-mongering monsters!” For a long moment, they glared at one another, neither backing down. Their staring contest was interrupted as Azura stepped forward, standing between them.

 

“Perhaps I can accompany Nerr. That way, she won't be alone when she's catching up to the rest of us.” Elise shook her head, long braid snapping back and forth like a thick rope.

“No!” She whined. “I said, no--”

“Azura is Nohrian, Elise.” Nerr told her softly, trying to placate her ire. “And she's very kind, and I trust her a great deal. Don't you trust me, little one?” The younger princess looked up at her, frown slowly fading to a pout as her shoulders slouched.

“...yes. Alright, _she_ can come, but no one else!”

 

“That's fair.” She turned her attention back to Ryouma one last time. “We'll see you when we see you, and for the gods' sake, _don't_ speak to any other Nohrians- the last thing we need is you inciting a riot.” He scowled at her.

“I would find your attempt at humor to be very unamusing if I didn't fear your words were the absolute truth, sister.” Shura's eyes widened as he looked between the royals.

“Sister? Did he just--? Are you--?”

“That's a discussion for a later time!” She called out over her shoulder, already leading both other women further away from the group. As they rounded the corner, Azura gave her a sidelong look.

 

“I'm surprised you didn't just outright deny being Ryouma's sister- isn't that what you used to do?”

“There was no point- I just know he's going to run his mouth when I'm not there, anyway...” Well, so much for her short-lived new identity. A thought struck her, so sudden it felt almost like being physically struck. She slowed her pace for a moment, reaching out and grabbing Elise's wrist to halt her as well. “Elise? This isn't-- You're not taking us to some... I don't know- underground love shack that belongs to Father, are you?” The blonde girl stared up at her for a long moment, before bursting into laughter.

 

“What? Ew! No, of course not! Trust me, Father doesn't even know I'm here, so you don't have to worry. Come on, follow me!” Pulling her hand free, she immediately intertwined her fingers with her sister's, breaking into a run and dragging the older princess along behind her. Despite the pain shooting up her arm, Nerr could not help but smile- it was such a familiar feeling, such a simple, joyous thing, to just be near her family again without swords drawn or vitriolic words passing between them. She'd forgotten what being this happy felt like.

000

 

Elise's “place” was a small, weathered cottage tucked far behind a grocer and several more homes. The exposed bricks were chipped and cracked in places, and the roof slanted inwards, as though one of the beams was broken, but inside, the rooms were clean, though sparsely furnished. A fire roared in the hearth of the main room, the warmth it put out greatly appreciated after so much cold, especially by Nerr's feet (and Azura's as well, no doubt). The most comforting thing about the home, however, was that Elise did not live there alone. The older Nohrian princess wasn't sure how she would've felt about her sister living in the underground by herself, but it wouldn't have been any kind of good. Fortunately, the true owner of the dwelling was an old, rotund woman with dark but kind eyes. Her gray hair was coming loose from it's bun, and her skin was criss-crossed with fine lines. Nerr had tried to stop Elise from introducing her to the old woman, and cringed with bated breath as she waited for the fallout to come. Surely, no one wanted to be caught helping Princess Traitor and her merry band of Hoshidans, but the stout matron smiled warmly at her as she gestured for both her new guests to sit by the fire.

 

“So _you're_ this big sister I keep hearing about. You're so lovely, oh, aren't you just gorgeous! 'Course, _all_ the royals are beautiful- King Garon knows he has fine taste in women, and he wasn't too hard on the eyes when he was young, either.”

“Oh. Um... well, thank you very much?” She really didn't know how to respond to such a thing. Of course, a princess always responded to compliments with humility and grace, but every part of the woman's rambling put her ill at ease. She had not seen herself in a mirror in a very long time, but Nerr had seen enough of the rest of her body to be sure that her face no longer looked “lovely”, not to mention that it should've been secret to no one that she was not Garon's child in anything but name. Elise set her basket on a table near the door.

 

“Nerr, this is Cassita. She was my nanny when I was little. She lives down here.” The smile she could hear in the younger girl's voice quickly fell away. “I... I've been spending a lot of time with her since you left...” At once, Cassita's own smile was replaced with a stern frown as she looked down at the older princess.

“She gets so lonely, poor thing, what with all the other royals off fightin' the war. Why don't you come home and visit more often, young lady?” A dozen valid reasons popped into her mind. Because it had taken six months just to _get_ home, because she was no longer _welcome_ in her home, because she and Garon were going to ensure one another's mutual destruction... But as Nerr looked over to Elise, who was still looking down into the basket of flowers, none of those reasons seemed to carry water. The sight of those narrow shoulders slumped in desolation... She looked away, down at the scrubbed floorboards at her filthy feet.

 

“...because I'm a terrible person... because I don't deserve to call myself her sister...” She whispered, wishing in that moment she could just keel over and die just to ease the guilt tearing her insides apart. There was a gentle patter of light steps as Elise ran over to her, dropping down to her knees and clutching the older girl's hands in her own as she stared up into her face.

“Don't say that, big sis! You're _not_ a terrible person! You're the best person ever! You're--” She broke off with a gasp, eyes taking in her bloody sleeves. “You're hurt! What happened to you?!” Nerr glanced at her own arm, the sight of the thin wooden shafts protruding from her arms making her stomach turn more so than the pain itself.

 

“Oh, there were... bandits in Windmire... it's a long story...”

“You've just been walking around like this?! What are those horrible Hoshidans even good for?! Cassita! Can you please bring me some hot water and bandages?”

“Oh, of course, dear. I'll put some tea on, too. Oh, gracious...” The older woman toddled into the room towards the back of the house, leaving the princesses alone.

 

“Elise, it's fine, really--”

“It's not fine! It's not fine at all! Take off your shirt- I have to heal you since nobody else is going to.” It seemed that once again, the younger girl's anger was rearing it's head, which made Nerr exceedingly uncomfortable. Her Elise _never_ got angry- a bit upset if things didn't go her way, perhaps, but never had she responded with outright _anger._ She had just gathered the hem of her sweater in her hands when she realized something, lowering it.

 

“I can't take it off yet. I have to pull the arrows out first.” She grabbed one of the shafts, stiffening in anticipation of the pain.

“Nerr, I think you're supposed to leave those in.” Azura said hastily, her pale complexion taking on a sallow tinge as she looked on fear and disgust. “Maybe you should wait until Sakura can—”

“Anything Sakura can do, Elise can do just as well.” She said firmly. “Elise is a wonderful healer, and I trust her with my life.” The blonde girl beamed at the compliment.

“Yeah. Yeah! I'm a great healer, and I've been practicing a lot on all the injured soldiers that came back from Hoshido, so I'm even better now than before!” Well, that was certainly a new revelation. Given the way Yukimura and Ryouma had spoken of it, it seemed like Nohr's forces had destroyed Hoshido's in an entirely one-sided battle. But that was stupid; both sides always suffered casualties in a war.

 

Pushing the thought of just how many soldiers may have perished from her mind, Nerr tightened her grip on the small arrow, clenching her teeth as she began pulling it slowly from her arm. The feeling of the wood sliding against her muscles set her nerves aflame with agony. Her skin grew hot as blood began seeping into her sleeve, staining the black cloth even darker. With one last tug and a hoarse cry of pain, she was finally able to pull it free. Azura found a pail that seemed to be for trash in one of the corners and brought it over, averting her eyes from the gruesome scene before her. At least now she wouldn't have to toss the bloody arrow on the floor- that would've been unspeakably rude. Sadly, the process needed to be repeated three more times. Halfway through pulling the second arrow free, it seemed to catch on the muscle, and an extra sharp yank left her reeling in pain. Vision blurring as her entire body was consumed with agony, Nerr groaned, doubling over and retching. The sound of vomit splashing into the pail only turned her stomach further, and she gagged again.

 

“Big sister? Are you okay?” Elise's voice was small and fearful. Breathing hard and trying to swallow her nausea, the older princess nodded tersely, afraid to move her head any more- it felt like someone was driving an icepick into her temples.

“Fine. This is nothing.” Trying to breathe deeply without inhaling the stench of bile, she went back to work. It seemed to take much longer than it should have to remove two arrows lodged inside her, but Nerr was exhausted, and the pain drained her of what little strength she had left.

 

When it was finally over, her arms ached fiercely and her hands were full of splinters. It had taken long enough for Cassita to return with a bowl of steaming water, a clean cloth and several bandages. She tried to pull her sweater off again, but she was too sore to move. Surprisingly, Azura got to her feet, walking over to stand in front of the other girl, telling her to lift her arms. Nerr felt ridiculous, being undressed like a child, but she was grateful just the same, especially considering just how squeamish the Hoshidan woman seemed around blood. Two different horrified gasps met her while her head was still inside the dirty top, leaving her to imagine their expressions.

 

“Oh, dear gods have mercy...” Popping her head out, the Nohrian girl took her filthy sweater back from Azura, holding it over her now exposed chest. Cassita blinked hard, snapping herself from her shock. “Oh, erm... why don't I just empty this and get back to making that tea...?” She picked up the foul contents of the bucket, heading back further into the house. Elise's stunned expression remained firmly in place.

“Nerr...? Wh-what happened to you? You're all—”

“It's not been a kind journey back to Nohr. But it's nothing you need to worry about; they're just scars, Elise. Like the one you have on your knee. Nothing to make a fuss about.” It was clear the younger girl wanted to argue, and Nerr did not blame her- clearly, large burns were not at all the same as falling down on a piece of glass. But it seemed the presence of fresh puncture wounds still thickly oozing blood took priority. Her brows furrowed, Elise reached for the cloth, wetting it and wringing it out before setting to work cleaning the wounds before her. Despite the heat hurting almost worse than the actual injury and the tension hanging over them, Nerr forced herself to smile. She needed to show Elise she was alright, even when it was a lie- _especially_ when it was a lie. How else would she get her to stop worrying?

 

“You were right, Elise; your technique has greatly improved since the last time I let you treat me. Of course, that was a broken hand... Which reminds me; where is your staff?”

“Back in the castle.” She replied quietly. Well, that was practically a non-answer.

“Elise...”

“You want to know why I'm here, don't you?”

“That had gone through my mind.” The young princess paused in her ministrations, clutching the rag tightly, bloody water dripping out and onto the floor.

 

“...the castle just doesn't feel like home anymore...” Nerr frowned tightly.

“What do you mean?” Of all the reasons her sister could've cited, that probably came the most as a surprise. For some reason, she had been expecting her to say that Garon had sent her down there to keep her safe when the Hoshidans finally came. But that had already been disproven when Elise said her father didn't know she was in the underground. Dunking the rag back into the bowl of water and wringing it out, tinging the rest of the water pink, she continued cleaning the deep punctures.

 

“A lot has changed since you left and the war kicked up. We all... well... we were all so upset when you decided to stay in Hoshido, we could hardly stand to look at each other. Camilla said the Hoshidans brainwashed you, and Leo said that you never loved us at all... Xander... Xander never said anything. I was so mad at him for trying to fight you in Cyrkensia that I yelled at him for a week straight; if he hadn't been such a jerk, you could've come home then and there!” Her voice had begun rising until she was practically yelling. Sniffling, she set the bloody rag back in the bowl and reached for one of the bandages, continuing in a more subdued voice.

“We all argued all the time. Now... Xander just came back from Hoshido, but he's still always gone. Leo just vanished a few weeks ago and we have no idea what happened to him, and Camilla never leaves her room anymore. Sometimes... I start to head out to the Northern Citadel, but then I remember there's nobody there anymore...!” Still clutching the bandage, Elise began weeping softly. “It's like we're not a family anymore. I just want things to go back to how they were before...!”

 

Nerr blinked to clear her vision, ignoring the tears that dripped down her cheeks. What did her tears matter? They didn't, not at all- not in the face of her sweet little Elise's misery. Paying her still gaping wounds no mind, she reached out, drawing her sister into a tight embrace and saying nothing when she began wailing in earnest against her bare neck.

 

“I am so sorry, little one.” She whispered, unable to raise her voice any louder past the lump in her throat. “I'm the worst person who ever lived. I... I've ruined everything, haven't I? I've been so busy thinking about how miserable _I_ am, I didn't even consider that you all might be unhappy. I always told myself, 'at least they have each other- that's more than what I have', but...” But she was wrong. She always assumed that everyone she held dear meant more to her than she did to them. Spending so much time with the Hoshidans and watching the few people she'd had on her side slowly drift away from her only seemed to prove her right, but she remembered Leo sobbing in her arms just as Elise was doing now. She was just being selfish and self-centered, believing that she felt things more deeply than others. She was just giving herself another way to escape the blame of her actions. Tears poured from her eyes, completely obscuring her vision.

“Oh, gods, I'm so sorry...!” Elise should've recoiled from her, should've denounced her for being so selfish, but being cold was simply not in her nature. The youngest princess sniffled and pulled back a bit, wiping her own tears on her sleeve before reaching out and hastily rubbing them from Nerr's face as well.

 

“Don't cry, big sis! Everything's gonna be fine! You're here _now;_ that's all that matters!” For a long time, the older woman simply looked at her sister, the cogs slowly turning her mind. Was she willingly so ignorant of the situation? No, that could not be possible; she knew enough to know that Hoshidans were the enemy, to know what they had been doing. Young though she was, Elise was not foolish enough to simply disregard that, since she was traveling with them, Nerr must have in some way had a part to play in what had happened. The only other option was that she simply did not care; that she was willing to ignore all her sins in favor of repairing her family. It was at once noble and utterly idiotic, and Nerr felt her chest tighten painfully, both in love for the girl before her, as well as hatred of her own wickedness. Putting her little sister in a position where caring for her could be treasonous- she was filth. Hanging her head, she could say nothing in response to those heartfelt, desperate words. Instead, she once again changed the subject.

 

“But... why are you selling flowers? Surely you don't need the money...” True, it was war time, but she could not imagine Elise desperately needing anything so expensive that she had to supplement the income she received from the king. Downcast violet eyes brightened a bit as Elise got to her feet, dashing over to gather her basket and bring it over.

“Oh, that's just to help Cassita a little bit. I collect the flowers in the castle conservatory and bring them here to sell. It takes my mind off the whole situation and I give the money to Cassita. I know it's not much, but since the war kicked up, everything's gotten so expensive, especially in Windmire. Father ordered that food prices be lowered, but that just makes everyone unhappy...” Her expression fell a bit, but she quickly perked back up. “Flowers make people happy! I figured that if I couldn't be happy, I could at least make others happy, but seeing them smile makes _me_ happy too, so everyone wins! Look, look how pretty they are!”

 

She set the basket on Nerr's lap as she resumed her bandaging. Even though they had probably been picked that morning, the petals were shriveling slightly. A wide variety of flowers, in varying shapes and colors, were arranged in the basket, the cloying smell almost overpowering. Given that she lived very far out in the mountains, Nerr had only seen cut flowers such as these, and even then, only common ones- roses, lilies, lavender... she was hardly an expert on floriculture, but one bunch of blossoms caught her attention. Pale pink lilies, their petals flared out like stars. She reached into the basket and pulled one out, it's sweet scent as pleasant as it's beauty. Elise smiled at her.

 

“You can have that one, big sis. It's pretty, just like you.” The older woman frowned slightly, tightening her grip on the stem.

“Don't pick these anymore, Elise; they're poisonous.” Azura, who had been sitting very quietly until that point, stiffened visibly.

“Are they really?”

“Quite. They'll make your heart stop if you swallow them.”

“Oh no! B-but they're so pretty! I've been selling them to people- I didn't know! I didn't know flowers could be poison!”

 

“It's alright, Elise.” She patted the younger girl's shoulder. “I'm sure no one would be foolish enough to eat them. No harm, no foul. But perhaps I should take all of them, just in case... someone else sees them and wants to buy them.” Without waiting for a response, she gathered the rest of the flowers, Naked Ladies she was sure they were called, holding them in her lap while she set the basket on the floor. Elise bit her lip, tying off the last bandage.

“Why would we have poisonous flowers in the hothouse? Isn't it easy enough to kill people with weapons and magic...?” Putting her arms back in her sweater, Nerr hesitated.

“Perhaps Garon has them for the same reason you were drawn to them; they're nice to look at. Even a sword does not _have_ to be used as a tool to hurt others.”

 

“But it _is._ That's why they're made. That's the only reason Father would have them...” The blonde girl sighed deeply, looking despondent. It was a similar expression to the one she wore in Cyrkensia.

“...it's not like you to speak of your father that way...”

“Yeah, well... Father has been acting strange lately.” That even piqued Azura's interest.

“Why do you say that?” The young girl frowned at her slightly.

“Hey, nobody's talking to you, lady. Nerr might say you're Nohrian, but you're with the Hoshidans- you were the one who tried to deceive us in Cyrkensia!” The songstress flinched slightly, not expecting to be called out on her ill-conceived plan here and now.

 

“That wasn't what it seemed. I didn't--”

“Elise, ignore that now.” Nerr said, her tone rather clipped. “What do you mean, 'acting strange'?” The young princess, despite her willful manner on occasion, deferred to her elder siblings, and this time was no different. Shrinking away slightly, she addressed the floor rather than her sister.

“Well... It's... He's been... scarier than usual. He flies off the handle for the smallest things. He has people sent to the dungeons like it's nothing, and I've even heard him scheduling executions for just... stupid, petty offenses. He even... he even killed Zola... Right in front of me... He's _never_ done anything like that before! And-- and it's more than that- ever since Xander told him about... about you staying in Hoshido, he's had this cold, empty expression on his face, even when he's holding war councils, like he's not even in the same room as us. Sometimes...” She leaned closer to Nerr and lowered, to keep Azura from overhearing her.

“Sometimes, I hear him... praying, I guess? To this god he calls 'Anankos'. And when he's not angry, he looks... scared. He's always mumbling something about a 'tithe'...” She straighted, her cherubic face pinched with worry. “I think even Xander is beginning to question him- he says Father is like a completely different person than how he was even a few years ago. He said Father was never a religious fanatic... he even said that it may be time for him to step down, soon.”

 

The older Nohrian frowned deeply at her words. Anankos... hadn't that been what Azura said destroyed her homeland? Perhaps Garon simply didn't want it to spread to Nohr? After all; the western half of the continent had been stricken with many forms of pestilence, and with a war going on, the last thing anyone needed was an epidemic. But all this nonsense started after he got word that she was alive and in Hoshido, where he could not easily reach her... a small part of Nerr felt a sick thrill of satisfaction in believing that she was playing a part in the king's mental deterioration. Good; let her drive him just as mad as he had driven her. But on the other hand... if _Xander_ was calling their father into question...

 

“Really? _Xander_ , our brother Xander, thinks Father might need to abdicate the throne?”

“Yep. He said Father wasn't nearly as scary when he was younger, or religious. I mean, he attended services on holy days- sometimes, we even went with him- but he wouldn't just drop everything to _pray._ Xander said Father wasn't cruel back when he was a child, that he loved showing his strength... but he had dignity and charm and would never let so many people die in a single war.” Nerr nodded grimly. That coincided with what she had known of the Nohrian king, before his... wickedness... came to light. Granted, she only knew what she had been told of him, but so many people could not be wrong. Even Gunther told her that when he fought alongside the king in battle, Garon would rather pull back and regroup than continue sending forces headlong into certain death. The mark of a sane, rational man. But then again, there was nothing saying that sane, rational men could not be cold-blooded killers. Elise was still talking, not realizing that her audience's attention had drifted elsewhere.

 

“He told me that things started getting bad after Queen Arete died, though you leaving completely put him over the edge.” Even though that may well have been the truth, Nerr still did not take kindly to the thought of Xander trying to pin their father's madness on her.

“Xander never mentioned anything like that to _me._ He only ever spoke of his mother, Queen Katerina, in my presence.”

 

“All things considered, that's not very surprising. Queen Arete was never very popular amongst Nohrians...” Azura's expression had turned dark, her lips pulled into a tight frown.

“Oh my! Now _those_ names bring back some memories!” All three women jumped slightly, turning to see Cassita standing in the doorway, holding a tray laden with cups and a kettle, a wistful smile on her plump face. “Queen Arete... Queen Katerina, too. I haven't thought of her in ages! Such lovely ladies!” Elise pouted, putting her hands on her narrow hips.

 

“Cassita! Were you listening to our conversation this whole time? That's not nice!” The old woman's eyes turned apologetic as she approached them, setting the tea tray on the table.

“I'm sorry, honey... but your tea has been ready for ages! It was so awkward, standing in the kitchen and waiting for you ladies to finish... I couldn't help but overhear a few little words here and there...”

“It's alright, madam.” Nerr said quickly. After all, they were guests in her house, and she was taking care of Elise. The youngest Nohrian royal was not well known for keeping secrets- what she heard probably wasn't anything Elise hadn't already confessed to her. Given that she had been the girl's caretaker, it was safe to assume she had lived in the castle, at least for a time... “I'm curious, though; did you know either queen?”

 

“Oh, sure did! I worked for them both for a time. Both fine ladies, just fine!” She seemed eager to chat, smiling widely as she set about pouring tea. “I remember King Garon was completely heartbroken when poor Katerina died, became a shell of himself. Said he'd never marry again! Ha! That changed the minute he met Lady Arete. She had such an amazing voice- her singing would fill the castle. And she was so beautiful! She looked an awful lot like your friend there, actually.” She handed Nerr a steaming cup while beaming at Azura, who shrank back from the attention. It was just as Leo had said. The Nohrian princess frowned slightly.

“That would make sense, seeing as how she's Queen Arete's daughter...” Both Cassita and Elise gasped in unison.

“Oh, my stars and garters! I can hardly believe it! King Garon said you'd been killed by the Hoshidans!”

“I assure you he was lying.” The singer said coldly, her fingers curling into fists. “He simply made no effort to get me back when they captured me.”

 

“Wait... so... if you're Queen Arete's daughter, then that means... I have another sister I didn't even know about?!” Elise's expression was torn between confusion and despair. Azura seemed to be trying to ignore her misery.

“Not surprising. You were born after I was already living in Hoshido. Your siblings were discouraged from talking _to_ me, so I doubt they had much inclination to talk _about_ me.” Nerr frowned at the other woman. Even though what she was saying was true- after all, _she_ hadn't know about the lost princess until they met in Hoshido- it seemed she was unjustly demonizing their Nohrian siblings. They did not speak of any of their deceased brothers and sisters, for there had been many of them. Camilla had even said back in Chevalier that they all believed Azura was dead as well, at the hands of the Hoshidans; could they truly be blamed for not wanting to dredge up painful memories?

 

“My goodness... This is the most exciting tea time I've had in ages!” Laughing slightly, Cassita trailed off, fixing Azura with a thoughtful gaze, before dipping into a slight curtsy. “Princess Azura, I'd just like to say, it is a blessing to finally see you again after all these years. Your mother would be crying tears of joy if she could see you, all grown up and beautiful and back home where you belong...” The songstress flinched slightly at those words. Nerr could not tell if it was someone declaring that Nohr was her home, or simply the unwanted attention that was making her so uncomfortable, but she knew the other princess would not tell her even if pressed.

“Um...” Seemingly grateful for a distraction, she looked up at Elise, who had approached, her brows drawn and her sweet face melancholic. “I... I'm sorry I was so mean to you, Azura. I didn't know... I didn't know you were my sister. I would never have said those things to you if I knew...!” Exceedingly uncomfortable, Azura squirmed slightly in her seat.

 

“Er, it's alright, Elise. I know you didn't know, and given what happened the last time we saw each other, it's understandable that you'd be wary of me. I just hope that we can move past it.”

“Yeah!” Bolstered by her quick forgiveness, the younger girl beamed widely at the singer, reaching down and pulling her into a suffocating embrace. “Now that you're here too, we can make up for lost time! We'll all be a family again; I just know Xander and Camilla and Leo are going to be so happy that you've come back with Nerr! I'm so glad I met you, big sister!” Over the girl's shoulder, Azura shot Nerr a pleading look, to which the Nohrian girl shrugged haplessly. What was the singer expecting her to say- 'sorry, Elise, but Azura likes her Hoshidan family too much to play big sister to you'? True as it may have been, it was beyond cruel, and Nerr would not shatter her little sister's tenuous happiness so easily; there was plenty of time for it to be dashed upon the jagged rocks of reality in the coming hours.

 

For now, the lazuline-haired girl would just have to endure being loved by a Nohrian. Not wanting to be rude, they finished their tea before insisting that it was time for them to leave, thanking Cassita for both the warm beverages and the hospitality. The kindly matron beamed at the women, telling them that Nohrian royalty was always welcome in her home, and demanding they come by to visit Elise more often. As she headed towards the door, once again dressed, Nerr stumbled as she felt something collide with her middle. Looking down, she saw Elise clinging to her tightly.

 

“Elise, you have to let go.”

“I don't wanna!” She protested, her voice muffled by the dirty sweater she was pressing her face into.

“I'm sorry, Elise, but we have to go now. We have to meet up with the others--”

 

“I'll take you to them!” Violet eyes, wide and mournful, looked up at her, pleading. “I know this place like the back of my hand- I can take you to the tunnels! Please, Nerr... I've missed you so much... please don't leave me again...” The older princess felt her heart sink at those tearful words. ' _Don't leave me_ '- how many times had she screamed that same phrase in her nightmares as those she loved were either swallowed by the darkness of death, or turned their backs on her and walked back home without her? _'Don't leave me all alone!!'_ She sighed deeply.

 

“...alright. You can walk us to the tunnel--”

“Yay!!” She tightened her grip around Nerr's stomach, squeezing the breath from her. “We can catch up- I'll fill you in on all the things that have happened since you've been gone so you're all caught up when you come home!” It was clear that there was no dissuading her from her mindset at the moment, so the Nohrian princess simply nodded slightly. She could already guess exactly what Elise would have to say- there had been fighting and sadness, and she had been at the center of it all. Still, for just a few minutes, she could pretend that she was going home, and that everything would fall in place like she had always hoped it would.

000

 

A/N- So, exposition is a thing. I feel like it _probably_ could've been shoved into the last chapter, but that would've made it unbearably long. And another thing; I don't like the thought of Hoshidans just being able to waltz into the Nohrian capital like it ain't no thang. There's a fucking _war_ going on- everyone knows that, unless Nohrians are all too busy being evil and stupid to realize what's going on around them. During war time (and sometimes, even during peace time), people freak the fuck out when people from enemy countries are in _their_ country. Just noticing someone who looks like “The Enemy” is often enough to send people into a panic, and usually, a violent one. In my head canon (which, let's be frank, is what this entire fanfic is), word spreads about what's going on. When a bunch of border guards end up dead, and when the Hoshidans are constantly being confronted by soldiers and getting into (deadly) confrontations with them, word reaches places like the capital. And seeing as both Camilla and Leo were near Chevalier, it's probable that they found out about the attack at the border, as well as Iago undoubtedly talking about what happened in Macarath. And let's be frank- we _all_ know Elise is a little eavesdropper; there's no way she didn't find out about that stuff. I know she's supposed to be sweet and all-loving, but even she has her limits.


	21. Bad Blood

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Ch. 21- “Bad Blood”

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Loathe as Nerr was to admit it, Elise's help had been a boon. The mass of catacombs that made up the sewer tunnels beneath Windmire was downright agoraphobic, the high ceilings amplifying every sound to almost unbearable levels and resulting in a very disorienting experience. She was certain that she and Azura would've been wandering for hours had the younger princess not been guiding them, even going to the length of pointing out identifying markers that blended in seamlessly with the crumbling stone surrounding them. It was clear that this was hardly the first time Elise had been down here, and the thought of her little sister wandering aimlessly in the sewers while above, their family and country slowly went to hell, made her want to vomit. Any sense of self pity and resentment was cut short, however, as the sight of the the Hoshidan army (or what was left of it) came into view. Though they were still quite far away, Nerr could see Ryouma discussing something with Shura, who looked none too pleased with whatever he was hearing. The Nohrian princess paused for a moment, groaning slightly and reaching up to rub at her head, which was once again beginning to pound. The sight of armed soldiers brought to the forefront of her mind exactly what she was heading into- for a few short moments, she had almost forgotten the certain death situation she was lumbering into.

 

“Nerr?” Slowly, tiredly, she opened her eyes, looking over at Azura who was giving her a concerned once-over. “Are you alright?” That was a hypothetical question, to be sure, so she opted to give a hypothetical answer.

“You-- Have you ever been in a situation where you wished you were piss drunk? I'm-- That's me, right now. Gods, what I wouldn't give for it to be New Year's...”

“My mother used to say things like that...” Elise whispered sadly, her eyes downcast. “Of course, she usually _was_ drunk, so I guess it's not the same...”

“Elise...” As much as Nerr felt like scum for even inadvertently reminding her sister of any horrible early memories, a small part of her empathized with Garon's many concubines. It was no surprise the horrid man could effortlessly drive someone to drink. But before she could say anything remotely comforting, Ryouma's voice cut through the doleful silence.

 

“Azura! Nerrida! Over here!” Her lips turned down at his order- as if they weren't already heading in that direction? Still, she began walking towards the collected Hoshidans, though much slower and less enthusiastically than the singer. The faint sound of footsteps behind her was almost consumed by the water rushing through the canals. She stopped and turned.

“Elise, what are you doing?”

“Coming with you. I said I'd show you the way.” Her response was so effortless, so... normal, it was almost easy to ignore the way she looked past the older woman, eyes narrowed as she glared at the Hoshidans.

“I don't think that's a good idea, Elise. I don't want you to get more upset than you already are--” Her words were clearly falling on deaf ears as the blonde girl marched past her, chin lifted defiantly. Nerr was almost proud- she was fearless, just like her brothers and sister. But that wasn't always a good thing, and it certainly wasn't good in this scenario. Sighing deeply, she trotted to catch up, and Elise smiled up at her, apparently glad to see she was no longer arguing the point. The younger princess reached out, grabbing her hand and tugging on it.

 

“Okay, so we need to ignore the tunnel to the left they're all about to go in- it just leads to a dead end- and--” She had already begun leading Nerr to the central tunnel when Ryouma stepped in front of them, arms crossed over his chest, a slight frown pulling his lips down.

“What is the meaning of this?” He asked, though it was unclear which princess he was directing his question to. The younger of the two opted to answer regardless, her brows furrowing in anger.

“Outta my way, lobster!” She pushed him aside with her free hand. Given that she barely reached his chest, she could not have reasonably forced him aside, but the high prince moved a step back none the less, perhaps taken aback by this tiny waif of a girl glaring him down. He directed his attention back to Nerr, his frown growing more pronounced.

 

“Nerrida, I trusted you enough to allow you to speak freely to this-- ...girl... But I will not allow a Nohrian royal- and potential spy- to travel with us.” A deep scowl settled on her own face.

“Shut up, Ryouma--”

“Yeah, shut up, _Ryoma!_ ” Elise backed, speaking over her sister. “She's a Nohrian princess, she doesn't--”

“This _girl_ is my sister, and I don't need your permission--”

“--You think you can just waltz into Nohr and start giving orders--”

“--whatever the hell you want, but I can go wherever--”

“--just lucky my big brother isn't here to--!”

 

“Enough!” He threw his hands up, voice raising in frustration and echoing throughout the tunnel. “Gods above, are all Nohrians this noisy? Nerrida, sister... This is our one chance to reach King Garon unawares; are you truly willing to jeopardize that just to be obstinate?”

“First of all, Ryouma, there _is no_ catching Garon 'unawares'.” She stepped forward, poking him in the chest (or rather, the crimson armor that covered his chest) to further emphasize her point. “He knows we're here, _everyone_ knows we're here; we haven't exactly been subtle about anything! And secondly, Elise is not going to 'jeopardize' anything. Even if she was going to run off and tell some castle guard our exact whereabouts, that would be rather difficult since she hasn't left my sight since the moment she realized we were here, nor would she be able to leave _now_ without us noticing. If this goes belly-up, it's because of _your_ short-sighted planning, so stop looking for a scapegoat.” Leaving the older man with a stricken look on his face, she turned back to Elise, who seemed just as uneasy after that short speech. “Now, I think you said something about the left route being a dead end?”

 

“Um... y-yeah. Follow me.” Her grip on Nerr's hand was somewhat slacker this time, her pace a bit slower. The older Nohrian girl could hear the Hoshidans behind her grumbling about being led into a trap, and Scarlet reassuring- that is to say, lying to- Ryouma, telling him that his plan was solid. It was almost admirable that she was willing to let people march blindly to their demise rather than tell her lover that he was fighting a losing battle, but mostly, it was pathetic. Two pairs of feet quickly closed the distance between them, and she looked over her shoulder to see Azura and Shura fall in step behind them. Her lip twisted slightly, though for different reasons as she looked between the two.

 

“You don't think this is a trap?” She posed to the singer. Lazuline hair swayed as she shook her head.

“I may not know Elise as well as you, but she seems earnest. Besides, I... I don't like thinking ill of my sisters.” She forced a little smile, one that Elise returned wholehearted, which in turn caused Azura's to brighten a bit. It was a warming sight, but the light feeling in her chest fizzled out as she looked up at Shura.

 

“We've got a new guide. I know you don't want to get involved too deeply, so you're, you know... free to leave at any time.” The thief sunk his hands deep in his pockets, an inscrutable look on his face.

“I said I don't wanna have anything to do with killing the royals who actually allowed me to stay in their country; I didn't say shit about stealing from 'em.” His pensive expression broke into a grin that would've been charming had it not been so devious. “I trust good old Ryouma-sama about as far as I can throw him, and hey, what's a few trinkets to the people who have everything? I got a crew to take care of.”

“What?!” Elise's joyous expression turned livid as she glared at the former Hoshidan man. “You're gonna steal from us?!”

 

“Hey little girl, you and yours have been stealing from _us_ since your ancestors were born- it's called taxes, and it's the reason you've got that silver spoon in your mouth. You're Princess Elise, right?” She blanched slightly, looking up to Nerr for guidance. It was clear he already knew exactly who they were, so it made no difference to confirm nor deny. She nodded, and the younger princess uncertainly nodded back to the thief, who pulled his hands from his pockets to cross them over his chest. “Yeah, I saw you once, out parading with the other royals for one of the festivals. You were dressed to the nines, just like your brothers and sister- who do you think _paid_ for those fancy clothes, huh? Me and mine, that's who, every time we buy a loaf of bread. So get off your high horse, 'kay? Slumming it up and pretending to be poor ain't the same as actually _being_ poor.”

 

“But--! But--! _Nerr..._!” She looked back to her sister, pouting. Even though she understood exactly why her sister was perturbed, being surrounded by those who took their wealth for granted whilst also seeing firsthand exactly how miserable the conditions of the less fortunate were left Nerr with precious little patience for any kind of whining. She reached out, laying her hands over the younger girl's shoulders.

“Elise... do you know why Nohr is at war with Hoshido?”

“Um... because they're mean?”

“It's because Hoshido has more food than Nohr does. Do you think that's fair, that they have everything while we have nothing?”

 

“No!” She said vehemently. Nerr nodded sagely.

“So why is it fair that _we_ should have everything while those around us have nothing? Charity begins at home, little one.” While the younger princess mulled over her advice, a slight frown marring her features, she turned back to Shura, a deeper frown on her own face. “Touch my siblings' shit, and I'll gut you like a fish.”

 

“I will keep that in mind as I take everything that's not nailed down.” He placed one hand over his heart, making a twisted oath. Slowly, he let his hand drop, his expression turning rather serious. “You, uh... you're actually okay with me going into your home and robbing you blind?”

“It's not my home.” She said shortly.

“But you're Princess Nerr, right? I mean, I've heard of you. You're a Nohrian royal- why the fuck you're pretending to be a mercenary, I have _no_ idea. Shouldn't you... I don't know; be clapping me in irons and having me thrown into the dungeons?” She leveled him with a grim, tired stare.

 

“...I don't think people should starve to death for lack of coin. Especially my people. Even if they're criminals.” Shura kept her gaze for a long time, before sighing and shoving his hands back in his pockets.

“It's a damn shame you went to Hoshido; someone like you could've done a world of good in a place like Nohr...” Nerr could not tell if he was being honest or not, but did not press the subject. Many things may have changed had she made a different choice, but she sincerely doubted that she personally would've been able to change anything for the better.

000

 

As they slowly made their way through the maze of tunnels, Nerr could not help noticing the sense of unease that seemed to permeate the air. Following Elise and Shura, she continued looking back over her shoulder. It wasn't so much that she cared, but the murmuring behind her was too quiet and layered for her to make out any individual words; just loud enough to work it's way under her skin and settle there like static. It made her whole body itch, and she rubbed her eyes, trying to alleviate the pressure building behind them. As her pace slowed, it allowed for enough time for Ryouma to close the gap between them, which he quickly did, falling in step beside her.

 

“Nerrida.”

“What.” She could address him just as affirmatively as he could her.

“If you believe this plan to be short-sighted and foolhardy, why are you following along with it?”

“I'm _not.”_ She told him firmly. “If I've said it once, I've said it a thousand times- you and I have different plans; we're just heading in the same direction. And even though I know my words go in one ear and out the other with you, I'm going to give you one last piece of advice before I wash my hands of you completely. Do _not_ attempt to confront Garon directly. He will kill you. He will kill your siblings, and your soldiers, and you won't be able to do anything to stop him. You need to find Xander; he will not take kindly to Hoshidans in his castle, but he is wise and pragmatic enough to see an opening to stop the war. He _might_ be able to tell Garon you surrender and thus, call an end to the complete and utter decimation of your country.” The high prince remained silent for a long time, the sound of their footsteps filling in the silence between them. His voice was quiet, and pensive when he at last spoke.

 

“You've thought on this a great deal, haven't you, sister?”

“I've studied diplomacy at great length. There are times when you cannot achieve an all-out victory, Ryouma. Sometimes... sometimes, it's better to settle for what you can get, rather than risk everything and loose it all.”

“...Scarlet feels quite the opposite. We've spoken at length about this over the past week, and she still believes that we should not settle for anything less than peace on _our_ terms.” The fact that he was bringing that... _woman_ into this discussion left a bad taste into her mouth.

 

“Yes, well, _her_ country isn't the one that's under siege, now is it?” She stopped suddenly, and Ryouma halted his steps as well. She looked up at the older man, frustration and annoyance battling weariness in her mind. “Ryouma... If you want to stand around, being patted on the back and told what a wonderful and smart leader you are, then go back to Scarlet and _stop_ pestering me. But if you can look past your own hubris for a moment and realize that _nothing_ is going to work out the way you want it to and accept that, then... I will try to help you. I'm not making any promises, because I don't make promises I can't keep, and we are dealing with a madman, but... I will _try._ I will speak to my siblings, and hopefully, they can convince Xander, and when Garon is good and dead, the two of you might be able to work things out.” The samurai sighed deeply through his nose, his eyes dark as he looked ahead, where they were approaching an arch that led to what seemed to be another fork in the path.

 

“I wish so desperately that I could tell you that you're wrong. That we can win, that everything can work itself out if only we hold onto hope and believe that we are strong enough to overcome any obstacle that we're confronted with... but I cannot allow myself to be so obstinate. That kind of thinking is why Nohr is occupying Hoshido in the first place.” He closed his eyes for a moment, his expression in that moment seeming as though it should've belonged to a much older man. “I hope, for all our sakes, that Prince Xander is as rational a man as you make him out to be.”

“He is. He may have a personal vendetta against me, but--” She broke off her sentence abruptly, tensing as her eyes darted to and fro.

“Nerrida? What is--”

 

“Shhh.” She shushed him harshly, heart thudding in her chest as she tried to block out the sound of walking and water rushing around her. “I heard something.”

“Something like what?”

“I don't know, but it didn't sound right.”

“Well, what's 'right' supposed to sound like?” Takumi asked from the front of the group, his voice taking on the affect of nonchalance, though it was too tight for it to be believable.

“...not this.”

 

“Yeah, there's some spooky stuff down here.” Elise let her gaze roam the massive structure. “I found a dead body in one of the canals, once!” At once, the uneasy murmuring reached a fervent crescendo. Ryouma stepped forward, ordering calm from his soldiers, though it was clear he himself was set ill at ease by that grim news. He forced himself to smile, though it came out as more of a twisted grimace than anything.

“Yes, well... Thank you for the warning, Princess Elise.”

 

Try as she might to hear it again, the sound no longer reached her. Relaxing her tense shoulders inch by agonizing inch, Nerr slowly turned back to Elise. The younger girl met her gaze with a brilliant smile. Luminous as her sister was, she could not imagine that smile standing up to death and tragedy and suffering, not playing out before her eyes. Inhaling deeply, she reached out, resting her hand atop her sister's head.

 

“Yes. Thank you so much for accompanying me here, Elise. I'll be alright from here. You should get back to Cassita.” Elise's bright expression dimmed as her smile slipped away.

“What? No! Why?”

“Because... we're going to the castle.”

“I know! That's why I'm coming, to show you the way! I don't want you to accidentally set off any traps!”

“Elise... I...” Despite the words being clear as day in her mind, she could not bring herself to voice them aloud. The sororal part of her mind demanded she do what little she could to spare her sweet baby sister the cruel reality of the situation... Fortunately, Takumi felt absolutely nothing for the younger Nohrian girl.

 

“We're going to go fight your father, and brother, and the waves of Nohrian soldiers that are standing between us and them! Do you _really_ want to see that? Do you want to see the people who probably guarded you all your life get stabbed and shot? Because that's what you're _going to_ see if you don't turn around and go home right now.” Nerr cringed at his tone more so than his words. That was the core of what she had wanted to warn Elise of, but she would've spoken with more... compassion, at the very least. The Hoshidan prince may as well have said, “We're going to the market to buy milk, stupid!” Elise stared at Takumi, her eyes growing wider as it began to fully dawn on her just what a battalion of Hoshidans storming into Castle Krakenburg meant for the people involved. Frantically, she turned to her sister.

 

“That's-- that's not-- that's not what you're doing, is it? You're not... with them... You're just... coming home, right?” Nerr looked away from her.

“Elise, if I could have 'just' come home, I would have done so months ago. You see how Garon reacts to my presence. You see how Xander reacts.”

“So what you're saying is... you're going to try and kill Xander and Father, right?”

 

“No!!” She cried out as a knee jerk reaction. The sight of Elise's mournful gaze boring into her was driving her mad, and she clawed at her skull. The guilt was eating away at her just as surely as the acid in Fort Dragonfall had. “It's-- It's not _like_ that, Elise... I-- I would never _think_ of killing Xander, I don't even want to _hurt_ him, he's my _brother!!_ I love him with all my heart and soul, despite what he may feel for me... but King Garon... The things he's done, Elise; they can be neither justified nor forgiven.”

 

The younger girl slowly backed away from Nerr, her eyes filling with tears as she shook her head, refusing to believe her words, refusing to accept them. For the first time since she'd made her decision that Garon's death was what she was living for, Nerr felt _bad_ for thinking that way. She still felt nothing but resentment and animosity towards the king, and she was still content with the thought of being executed after she had ended his life, but somehow _this_ was something she had never given any thought to. She had already accepted the fact that her siblings would be angry with her and hate her afterwards, but she had never truly taken into account that they might be _hurt_ by her actions, by the loss of both a sister and their father. Elise's pain, her fear and disgust, hurt her more deeply than any hatred could. Nerr lunged at her sister, kneeling down and grabbing her hands, holding them tightly enough to keep her from running (though, wasn't that exactly what she had _wanted_ earlier?).

 

“Elise. Listen to me, Elise, _look at me!_ ...the last thing I want is to tear your family apart more than I already have.”

“...so what will you do to Father...?” The blonde princess asked quietly, a bitter edge in her voice. Nerr loosened her grip on the girl's hands, aware that she was probably both hurting and scaring her.

“Maybe I'll just toss him in the dungeons like he did with me. It never hurts to have a bargaining chip...”

“I see...” Elise inhaled deeply, her mouth set in an uncharacteristically grim line as she looked her sister dead in the eye. “That settles it. I'm coming with you!”

“Elise, no!! Didn't you hear anything Takumi said? Didn't you hear anything _I_ said?! It's too dangerous, damn it! I will _not_ drag you into this fighting!” The younger girl pouted, putting her hands on her narrow hips.

 

“Don't be stupid, Nerr. I'm not going to fight anyone... and neither are you!” This time, she was the one resting her hands on the other woman's shoulders, her eyes fearful yet determined. “I'm not siding with or against you, sister. I just want this fighting to stop! I want everything to go back to the way it was before, and I _know_ it can; I don't care what you or Xander or anyone else says! You're all acting like big, stupid, stubborn children! Xander and Father are still super mad at YOU, but I know they'll hear _me_ out. They're _going_ to hear me out!” The older princess was taken aback by her sister's words... and her bravery. That forceful speech was so unlike anything the old Elise would've said. It seemed the war even changed that. Behind them, Takumi made a point of spoiling the mood by laughing derisively.

 

“Are you serious? Are you fucking _serious?!_ We are about to run headfirst into the heart of the Nohrian army, and you want to bring a little girl who's grand strategy is asking people to pretty please not fight!?” Nerr opened her mouth to retort, but she was cut off by Elise, who marched right up to the Hoshidan prince's face, glaring hatefully at him.

“What's your strategy, huh? Just murder everyone who doesn't look like you? Would you respect me more if I was a _murderer_ like _you?_ ” Surprisingly for someone who didn't seem to value the opinions of Nohrians, the youngest prince flinched at her cold words. “Maybe the war _can_ end without more fighting, but we'll never know if you just run around _killing_ everything! Don't we at least have to _try_ to end this without hurting each other even more?” Silence fell over the group. It was Ryouma, of all people, who stepped forward first.

 

“I agree with Princess Elise. There has already been so much bloodshed- too much. If there is even a chance to bring this to a heel peacefully, no matter how small, we must take it.” An agitated silence fell over the band of Hoshidans as they exchanged dark looks. Trembling slightly, Sakura took a tentative step forward as well, to stand beside her brother.

“I-I think that's what we should do t-too. M-Mother always wanted p-peace; I-is this really how we honor her l-legacy? By s-s-scoffing at the notion...?” The young princess shrank away as dozens of pairs of eyes fell on her, but Ryouma clapped his hand on her shoulder.

“Truer words were never spoken, sister. It is decided. While we _will_ defend ourselves, we will make no attempt to actively kill any Nohrian we come across. Is that clear?” Despite clearly not agreeing with the high prince's attitude, the soldiers all voiced their agreement. Nerr blinked slowly, still trying to take everything in. A slight tug on her sleeve drew her attention back to Elise, who was looking up at her with a concerned expression.

 

“Big sis? What's wrong?”

“...nothing. I just... I'm honestly shocked to hear those words come out of Ryouma's mouth. I think... I think I'm _proud_ of him. What is wrong with me...?!” The younger princess giggled.

“See? I already changed a Hoshidan's mind. It's not as hard as you're all making it out to be. Xander and Father will be a breeze after this!” While Nerr sincerely doubted either Garon _or_ Xander would entertain any notion of dispelling their mindset, she could not help but feel a spark of... something. Hope, perhaps. If nothing else, this was a step in the right direction.

000

 

It seemed that the more the walked, the longer the massive sewer seemed to go on. It reminded Nerr both of the Woods of the Forlorn and the looping rooms in the Sevenfold Sanctuary. A shudder ran up her spine, causing her gut to clench painfully. Reaching out with a hand that trembled more than she cared to admit, she tapped Elise's shoulder to get her attention.

 

“Are you sure this is the right way, Elise? We haven't, say... wandered into a house that's just cursed to look like a sewer that seems like it's changing every time you cross a threshold, but in reality, it's all just a construct of your subconscious mind... right?” The younger girl looked up at her, utter bemusement on her face, before she burst out laughing.

“ _What?!_ Oh, you're so funny, Nerr! That sounds like _exactly_ the kind of thing Leo would say. Do Camilla next!”

“I am not in any way joking about this.” Nerr said lowly, her lips set in a thin line. She stopped short, reaching out again to keep Elise from walking ahead. “There's a fork in the path. Elise, I need you to be completely honest with me; everything here looks exactly the way it's supposed to, yes? I'm not going to walk down one of those paths, then turn around and discover no one is behind me, and I'm alone with murdered statues, am I?” The blonde princess's face crumpled slightly.

 

“You're scaring me, Nerr...”

“Jeez, what's with you and things not being what they look like? You had a bad trip or somethin', princess?” Shura, who had been lingering behind, pulled up beside her, one brow cocked. Nerr looked away, muttering under her breath.

“I don't wanna talk about it...” The former duke continued staring at her for a long time, before shrugging carelessly.

“Whatever. I'm not interested in your life story. Everything here is exactly the way it's supposed to be. That left path leads to some interior courtyard- that's the one I lead the Hoshidans through.” Feeling slightly more at ease, the Nohrian girl inhaled deeply and nodded.

“Alright. Left path it is.” As she began veering towards the left, Elise reached out and pulled her back this time.

 

“W-wait! Camilla warned me to _never_ take that path! She said it's a death trap! We can take the right one- that's the one I use. It comes up right around my quarters.”

“And where are your quarters in relation to the throne room, Princess Elise?” Ryouma asked quietly.

“I live in the west wing of the castle. The throne room is in the top floor.”

“It'll be quicker going through a courtyard, then.” Nerr had only been to Krakenburg twice, but she had seen several courtyards from the main foyer, and vaguely remembered that Garon's throne was a few floors up from that. Elise looked distraught.

“But... but the death traps! What if you get hurt again, Nerr? What if you _die?!_ I don't-- I can't---” Her voice broke as tears welled in her eyes. Reaching into her brassier, the older woman pulled out her handkerchief, dabbing at the corners of her sister's eyes.

 

“Elise, look at me.” She waited until she had complied to continue talking. “The last six months have been a death trap. I have been impaled, stabbed, mauled, and partially digested. You would not _believe_ the sheer amount of bullshit I've had to overcome just to get back to Krakenburg. Yet here I stand before you. And I am not going to let anything, or anyone, stand between me and what I came here for... no matter _how_ much it tries to set me on fire.” Even though she was no longer tearful, Elise looked far from reassured.

 

“If you say so...”

“What is it, Elise? Hmm? What's really wrong here?” The young girl looked down, her violet eyes clouded with sadness.

“It's just... you seem like a different person now. So... cold. So hard. Like Xander...” She sighed deeply. “I guess... I didn't think I'd have to get used to you changing _too_...” Nerr thought those words would make her feel bad, guilty perhaps, but instead, they simply settled in the pit of her stomach like a rock.

 

“Neither did I, little one. Everything has changed since I was taken from Nohr. Seeing everyone around you die in horrible ways changes a person.” She forced herself to smile, knowing it didn't reach her eyes, but unable to do anything about that. “But don't worry, Elise. I promise I'm still the same person you know and love inside. And I'll always do everything I can to protect you, dearest.” That was a lie. Everything she was saying was lies, and she _knew_ Elise realized that too, but still the younger girl smiled back. It was easy to pretend it didn't look strained. It was easy to pretend everything still had a chance of being okay again.

 

“Aww, thanks sis. I'm so glad you came back home! I love you so much!” At the very least, that wasn't a lie, and she could feel exactly how much her sister meant it as she wrapped her arms around the older woman's waist, squeezing her as though she could somehow convey a lifetime of feelings through one hug. Nerr let her smile drop as she squeezed Elise back. That this could be her last chance was always creeping around the edge of her mind.

 

The dark, ominous thoughts were only fueled as they headed deeper into the catacombs. It was quiet, save for the sound of rushing water and the perpetual squeak of rats as they darted back and forth, not bothering to confine themselves to the shadows. The smell of raw sewage was all but unnoticeable over the fetid stench of rotting meat. It quickly became clear where the smell was coming from, as they passed the half skeletal remains of a human lying slumped in one of the corners. Their clothes were partially disintegrated, and a great deal of flesh seemed to have been gnawed off. One of their legs was caught in a trap, the massive metal teeth having completely shattered the bones of their tibia and fibula. While that was unnerving in and of itself, it quickly became clear that that poor soul was only one of countless who had lost their lives in the sewers. Skulls with large holes in them, bodies torn roughly in half, roaches and rats crawling about their exposed intestines, piles of shattered bone fragments that seem to have been crushed...

 

“I see Nohr is quite serious about not letting people sneak into their castle...” Ryouma muttered to himself darkly, his eyes narrowing as they passed a bony leg hanging from a snare. The rest of the body must have fallen down as it rotted, but there were no other remains below it. Nerr found it difficult to believe rats would've been able to drag off large bones. “Be on guard, everyone!” The high prince spoke aloud to his soldiers. It was clear Takumi needed no warning as he stared at everything in wide eyes horror, his complexion taking on the color of sour milk.

“What the hell is with all these traps? I mean, it looks like they've all been sprung, but I just _know_ they haven't- who's coming in and setting them in the first place? And why aren't they cleaning up all the corpses?!”

“C-corpses?!” Sakura, who had also been nearly slack jawed, immediately stiffened. “I-I-I thought these w-were just d-d-decorations!! To m-m-m-make it look s-s-scary...!!! I'm s-scared, nii-sama...!!!” While it seemed the youngest Hoshidan royal was close to soiling herself in fear, Nerr could not help but feel a hint of amusement as she glanced up. Several corpses hung from the ceiling, their faces withered, the flesh thin enough to see the bone structure beneath.

 

“Hehe... look.” She pointed up to them. “They _are_ decorations; for All Saint's Parade. Ha.” Indeed, the skeletal figures reminded her of the dolls her siblings had brought her one year from the festival honoring those dearly departed who died in terrible ways. Even though he was somewhere behind her, Nerr could hear the frown in Silas' voice as he spoke up.

“That is _not_ what All Saint's Parade decorations look like, Nerr. They're supposed to be cute!”

“They're _skeletons._ ” She would've argued the point further had a small hand not furiously latched onto her own. She looked down, immediately assuming it was Elise, and was surprised to see Sakura huddled close to her side, her eyes tightly shut. “You know this is no worse than what you've seen on the battlefield, Sakura...” She said, though not unkindly. The pink haired girl shook her head.

 

“Y-yes, it i-i-is. These p-people just died in t-traps. Like a-animals.”

“Well, if you're really that terrified, I guess I can hold your hand through this part. You still need to open your eyes, though; the last thing you want is to trigger one of these traps yourself.” Reluctantly, she did so, though she kept her gaze firmly on the filthy stone at their feet.

“Oh... th-thank you, nee-sama...”

“HMPH!” That angry huff was all the warning they had before Elise stormed over to them, her eyes flashing with rage. “What about _me?!_ I'm scared, too!!” She ripped Nerr's hand out of Sakura's grasp, roughly pushing the other girl away as she herself clung to the now free hand, her face screwed up with hatred. “Go to your own sister, Hoshidan!!” Sakura had stumbled a bit from the force of the shove, and she stared at Elise in shock for a long moment before bursting into tears and running back to Azura, who drew her into a comforting embrace at once. Nerr could feel that her mouth was hanging open, but could not shake her horror long enough to close it.

 

“Elise....! Good gods, what the hell was _that_ about!? That's not like you!” While her expression calmed a bit, there was still something dark in the younger girl's eyes as she looked up at her older sister.

“They already took you away once! I'm not letting them take you away again, not now that you're finally home. I won't let them!!” All at once, the Nohrian girl realized exactly how her sister must have felt upon seeing how different she had become. This aggressive possessiveness was downright terrifying in the henceforth sweet princess. If looks could kill, the Hoshidans would have murdered them a thousand time over by now, but Nerr had little time to worry about their grievances, or even her little sister's disturbing behavior. A loud growl, made hollow by the acoustics in the massive tunnel, echoed behind them. Elise noticed it as well, jumping and looking around fearfully.

 

“Uh oh... do you hear that?”

“Are there usually Faceless down here?” After dealing with them twice in a row, Nerr was beginning to assume they were lurking everywhere. Shura had already drawn his bow, notching an arrow as he too looked around frantically.

“There are never Faceless down here. Whatever that is, it sound feral.” The swishing of leathery wings soon accompanied the growling, growing louder and closer. By that time, all of the soldiers had armed themselves, still searching for the source of the sound as it seemed to be coming from nearly everywhere. Suddenly, the swishing stopped, replaced by the clicking of boots on stone. There was a small passageway offset in the tunnel, and it soon became clear that whatever was approaching them was coming from there. Nerr reached for her Yato, pushing Elise further behind her. She could only begin to fathom what monstrosity was to be set upon them- perhaps some kind of multi fused Faceless Iago conjured up in his spare time. A vague shadow seemed to take form in the darkness, and the princess unsheathed her blade. Whatever it was would not get past her. She would cut it down without the slightest hesitation and--

 

“Ah, Elise. _There_ you are! I've been looking all over for you!!” She immediately lowered her sword at the sound of the familiar voice, though she was clearly the only one. Elise peered out from behind her back before tentatively approaching the other woman.

“Camilla? What are you doing here?” The eldest Nohrian princess flipped her long hair back over her shoulders. Even though she was still half in the darkness, Nerr could see that it looked lank and ill cared for. Despite the obvious relief on the older woman's face, it did nothing to counteract the large purple bags under her eyes, or her sallow complexion. Even her form fitting armor seemed to be gaping a bit, hinting that she had lost more weight than could be healthy. She looked nothing like the vision of feminine beauty Nerr always remembered.

“Like I said, I was looking for you. Are you hurt, darling. Who are these people? Are you being kidnapped? Blink twice if you're being kidnapped!” The younger girl stepped out, heading towards her sister.

“What? No! These are--”

 

“The Hoshidans...!!” Camilla did not give her a chance to continue as she finally took in the appearance of those she believed to be kidnappers. It hurt Nerr more than she thought it would that her sister did not immediately recognize her, especially when Elise had done so. But perhaps, she was simply just as angry with her as the rest of their family. Regardless, Camilla unhooked the frosty silver ax dangling at her side as she reached out and grabbed Elise with her other, pulling the younger girl to her side. “I should have known you would be down here like the vermin you are, but I didn't think you would be that _stupid!_ How _DARE_ you bother my precious baby sister? Were you planning on stealing her away too, you fucking savages?! I'll make you regret ever leaving your filthy, heathen country!!” She charged at the crowd, ax raised above her head, and while Nerr was certain her sister could hold her own in a battle, even if the odd were stacked against her, the last thing she wanted was for her to get hurt... or slaughter the Hoshidans.

 

“Camilla, hold!” She just barely managed to step in front of the older woman, her own blade raised, but only in as a precaution in case Camilla tried to bring her Artemis down on her head. The elder princess came to a quick halt, lowering her holy weapon slowly as she looked down at the girl before her, a look of utter confusion writ on her face.

“...Nerr? ...is that you?”

“Yes, sister. It's me.” Still, she did not lower her blade; she wasn't sure what kind of mood the volatile woman was in at the moment. She quickly got her answer as a pair of strong arms wrapped around her, squeezing the breath from her and lifting her several inches off her feet.

“Oh, my precious baby!! I didn't even recognize you; I'd have cut you in half if you hadn't said anything! What happened to you!?”

“It's... a long story...” She gasped. Reluctantly, Camilla set her back down, though she did not relinquish her grasp on the other woman just yet.

 

“Oh, who cares! All that matters is that you're back home for good now! Hmm... how to go about this...? We might have to take you back to the citadel first, just until Xander and Father calm down--” Nerr pulled away from her sister, her expression dark.

“I'm not going back there, Camilla. In fact, I'm not going anywhere but straight to the throne room. I have a score to settle with the man I once called 'Father'. Namely, seeing if I can set him on fire while pushing him into the Infinite Chasm...”

“Oh, sweetie... I know you're mad at Father, and rightfully so, but you can't kill him. It's not possible. That won't accomplish anything but making him more upset. No, you need to just let your big sister take care of everything and--” This time, she was cut short, by none other than Hinoka stepped forward, her Amaterasu wreathed in flames and held at the ready.

 

“ _You_ need to back the hell off, lady, and get out of our way. I don't want to hurt you, but if you even _try_ to take Nerrida anywhere, I'm gonna have to cut a bitch. She's not crawling back to you _or_ that monster you call a father, not after everything you've done to her. If you want to help, just go away.” Camilla stared down at the other princess for a moment, her expression inscrutable. Finally, after a few painfully drawn out seconds, she smiled. At least, she pulled the corners of her lips upward. It looked like someone had sewn thread into her lips and was currently tugging it until she gave the appearance of a smile.

“I understand now. You _want_ to come back, but these horrid people are filling your pretty little head with their guilt and lies. They're trying to convince you everything will be alright if they kill Father... Don't worry darling; big sister will take care of these monsters for you.” She once again raised her ax, bringing it down on Hinoka's head. It would have cleaved her skull in twain had the Hoshidan princess not raised her own weapon to block the thick blade.

“Camilla, stop this! The only monster I need your help taking care of is King Garon!” Elise ran forward as well, tugging desperately on Camilla's sheer loincloth.

“Please listen, sister! They're not going to fight Father! I convinced them we all need to talk, and I just need to convince Xander now too!!”

 

“Oh, Elise... you're so pure. These byak demons are taking advantage of your innocence, sweetie- the only language Hoshidans speak is trickery and deceit. They already fooled Nerr into thinking they were on her side. But don't worry; I promise to save our precious sister. Once I've killed all her guilt-tripping friends, she's _sure_ to come back without any argument. Right? Right. She'll return to us; **she doesn't have a choice**.” Camilla grabbed her youngest sister's hand, roughly pulling her back into the darkness of the alley.

“Elise!!” Nerr charged forward instinctively, crying out as a projectile whizzed through the darkness, embedding itself firmly in her shoulder. The sudden shock dropped her to her knees, and she could hear the sound, not just of people talking- many people, barking out orders, it seemed- but also iron shod hooves and leathery wings echoing beyond the darkness. Ryouma approached slowly, his eyes narrowed, Raijinto held tightly in his hand.

 

“Damn it. I hadn't wanted to run into the Nohrians this early...” He glanced down at the still kneeling woman. Nerr was slowly working the arrow out of her flesh, gritting her teeth so hard she could've sworn one of them cracked. “What should we do, Nerrida? The last thing I want is to lead an attack against the Nohrian princess when it's clear she sincerely thinks she's protecting her sister from us...” With a final cry of pain, the young woman wretched the arrow free, tossing it away angrily. Her blood soaked sweater was beginning to stick uncomfortably to her skin.

“Camilla is out of her fucking mind. I need to find her and explain everything to her- _alone_ , because as long as she sees you all, she's going to think this is an attack, or abduction, or _something._ ”

 

“There's no way we're letting you go after that lunatic alone, Nerrida!” Hinoka's eyes flashed angrily as she cried out. “There are clearly soldiers out there, and I doubt they're going to just let you waltz up to the princess. Not to mention, did you forget she tried to _murder you_ the last time you saw her?!”

“...Of course not, but--”

“But nothing! I'm not letting you run headfirst into some death trap just because you still care more about these people than they care about you!” She could hear the angry tears in the red-haired princess's voice. Nerr could not decide how she felt about that, opting instead to ignore it, pressing her hand to her wound to staunch the blood flow. The pain helped a great deal in putting everything else from her mind.

 

“...fine. Do as you will. But stay back; I would prefer casualties to be as low as possible on _both_ sides, and I have no doubt in my mind Camilla has ordered these soldiers to kill you all on sight.”

“You too, probably...” She chose to ignore Takumi's muttered retort as well. Breathing deeply to both steel her nerves and bite back the pain radiating through her arm, the Nohrian princess shut her eyes as she stepped into the darkness. It would take a while for them to grow accustomed to the dark, but in the meantime, her sharp ears picked up on every tiny sound, the skittering of roaches and squeals of rats and dripping of water that leaked everywhere.

 

The voices of Nohrian soldiers was much further off. There would be none directly on the other side of the tunnel; she could not smell anything but rodents and mildew nearby, no source of warmth but the rats scurrying across her feet. As she reached the light on the other side, she stopped. And waited. For a very long time, waiting to see if any soldier would get impatient and come charging in. But there was nothing, no sign of movement on the other side. While she had bided her time, the others had begun filing in behind her. The only sound of breathing came from the Hoshidans, so Nerr decided it was a minimum risk to step into the adjoining tunnel. The sight of makeshift blockades made her stomach churn uncomfortably. Slipshod as they were, it still must've taken time to set them up, which meant there had been soldiers in the tunnels recently, despite Elise and Shura's staunch belief that soldiers did not enter the sewers. Garon must have already known they would be entering Krakenburg this way. The thought of that conniving, craven monster setting up blockades just _in case_ they made their way in that direction made her furious. There was being pragmatic... and there was being a coward. Hinoka stepped beside her, her lance raised and held in tightly balled fists.

 

“Where's that fake, bitch sister of yours...?” Her voice was a hateful sneer as she looked around the tunnel with narrowed eyes. At the far end of the walkway, a group of paladins were readying their weapons. Ryouma noticed them as well, his own weapon crackling to life.

“She'll probably be as far from here as possible, if she hasn't just taken Princess Elise and left the soldiers to deal with us.”

 

“No, Camilla wouldn't turn tail and run like some coward. She fights her own battles...” Nerr craned her neck slightly to look past some of the closest blockades. There were narrow dams running perpendicular to the walkways, leading all the way to the other side. Given how fast the water was running over them, however shallow it might have been, it made for a precarious bridge, but one that was relatively out of the soldier's range. “Camilla is most likely over there.” She pointed to the far end of the tunnel, where the highest concentration of soldiers were. “Silas, Felicia- you stay here and mind your flank. I don't trust reinforcements not to appear the moment we turn our backs.”

 

“Can do!” Felicia saluted, pulling a wide blade from the holster in her heel. Hinoka was much less enthusiastic.

“You're planning on charging headfirst into soldiers; aren't you usually the one telling _us_ how suicidal that is? We can lure them out in small groups, and--”

“Pick them off, one by one? Snipe them from a distance, like cowards? If that's how you want to fight, then be my guest.” The Nohrian princess set off in the direction of the dam. At the sight of movement, the first wave of soldiers began closing in, but she had no intention of giving them the chance to engage. Deeming them far enough to not be a threat, Nerr sheathed her blade and ran across the dam, her feet slipping over the the slick stone, but her momentum kept her going forward. She had almost made it to the other side when something large and blunt collided with her shoulder, the force of it knocking her into the water.

 

For a moment, everything seemed upside down, her mind awhirl with pain and confusion. In her panic, she gasped for air, inhaling a mouthful of filthy water instead. Choking, she tried to propel herself to the surface, but she could not move her right arm. The pain of transformation was drowned out by her fear, but whatever draconic instincts she had launched her upwards, a flailing mass of more limbs than an average human should have. With the gaping maw of her left arm, she pulled herself back onto the dam, only now taking note of the panicked shrieks that came from without her mind rather than within. The water on the other side of the dam was churning and bloody, and Nerr only just noticed a draconic maw occasionally bobbing above the surface before sinking back down again. A few yards from her, Takumi was struggling to keep both his balance and grip on his Fuujin. He glanced down at her for a moment, looking away again as another wyvern lord quickly closed the distance between them. Holding his bow up, he summoned the pale glowing bowstring and arrow, taking aim.

 

“Maybe next time, don't charge headfirst into things like an idiot.” He let loose his arrow, and it blew apart the wyvern's wing where it made contact, sending both mount and rider into the fast moving water amidst a rain of bone fragments and meat. “I won't always be around to save your ass, you know.” Breathing hard, Nerr stared at the younger boy for a long minute, before heaving herself to her feet with some difficulty.

“You tried to kill me once. This _just barely_ makes us even.” As hard as it was to walk when her body was even, the lopsided weight of her malformed arm made it nigh impossible to traverse the narrow ledge, but through sheer luck, she managed to stumble to the other side. There was barely time to catch her breath, as the soldiers on the other side had had ample time to converge on her current location. In the face of their raised lances and swords, she realized she could not drawn her own. Her arm hung limply at her side, slivers of white barely visible through the macerated red. The pain which had been blocked out by fear for her life was beginning to come back. She took a step back.

 

“Please, I don't want to fight you; I just need to speak to my sister!” One of the paladins scoffed.

“You byaks think we're all kinds of fucking stupid, don't you? Well, I got news for you; you--”

“Don't make quips, you fucking retard- just kill her!” The irate foot solider didn't even wait to finish his admonishment before charging at her. Normally, Nerr would have cowered. She would not have been able to raise a blade to a Nohrian soldier. But, as fate would have it, she had no blade to raise, only a monstrous abomination of a limb that cared not for the dilemmas of her human mind. Without even thinking about it, the princess raised her arm and swung it, smashing it into he soldier's chest like a hammer. Even though he wore a cuirass, the force of the blow sent him flying, and he hit the nearby wall with a painful sounding crunch. The remaining soldiers faltered, their faces pale and uncertain. Nerr raised her limb, the maw gaping as she brandished it at the Nohrians.

 

“I _said_ I don't want to fight! You all need to just back the fuck off, because I don't want to hurt you, but I _will!_ ” For a moment, it seemed they were seriously considering falling back, but the Nohrian army was not know for tolerating cowards in their ranks. Another foot soldier stepped forward, sword drawn, her eyes dark.

“You don't scare me, foul beast. I will not be cowed by a Hoshidan!” She charged, and though the princess swung her arm again, it seemed this one was ready for that. She ducked, drawing in close and trusting her blade forward. A quick twist was all the kept the fine steel edge from sinking into flesh, instead scraping loudly against more steel. As large and unwieldy as her organic weapon was, she could hardly use it to fight in close quarters. The soldier raised her blade, intending by the angle, to sink it deep into the flesh of her Nerr's belly, left unprotected by her breastplate. She could not even twist to try and dodge, all she could do was wait for the pain to come. And it did, only... not as sharp as she had expected. Not even as intense.

 

The other woman's eyes widened in shock that her blade had only just penetrated the padded cotton sweater, but she had no time to dwell on impossibility before her. There was a blinding flash of light followed by a deafening crack as a bolt of lightning struck the woman, causing her to convulse. Given that she was still holding the hilt of her blade, the current passed through the metal sword into the Nohrian princess's gut, but no sooner than she was certain she had escaped one death only to meet another did it stop. She still collapsed in a spastic heap, though the soldier fared far worse. Her vision was overtaken by dark spots, and the ringing in her ears was deafening. It took a long, long moment for her to realize the Hoshidans had joined her, dispatching the Nohrian soldiers with the ease afforded to them by their holy regalia. She groaned weakly as the burning itch of healing magic ran along her nerves, attempting to pull together the ripped flesh of her arm but unable to contend with gravity. At least the bleeding had stopped. A pair of firm hands wrapped around her malformed wrist, dragging her to her unsteady feet and holding her in place as she threatened to topple over yet again. She could hear arguing, but it sounded distant and hollow.

 

“--careful next time, Ryouma! What's the point in trying to help someone if you end up killing them instead?!” It took a lot of blinking to recognize Hinoka's messy crop of red hair before her. Ryouma looked none too upset, crossing his arms as best he could while retaining his grip on the long blade.

“Forgive me if my first thought is not caution upon seeing my sister impaled, Hinoka.” He turned to Nerr, his frown ever in place, though his eyes seemed a bit softer... maybe. Maybe she was just seeing things as her vision refused to focus. “Sister. You are well, yes? Say something.” She couldn't think of any words, instead pulling her arm out of the older princess's grasp and gingerly lifting her shirt. Ryouma was right; she really should be dead. The entirety of her torso was a dark blue, as if she had been crushed. It was possible the bruise came from the Raijinto's thunder magic causing all her capillaries to burst... but the skin didn't hurt to the touch. It felt rougher than usual... and slick. She could see little wisps of steam rising from her. The flesh along her ribs was even tougher, harder... plated into interlocking scales. She hadn't even had time to think about transforming- it had happened without any conscious thought or effort, in response to danger. That would've been a comforting fact to know, only... it wasn't receding as it usually did when she transformed. The skin remained pebbled and hardened, and the longer she looked at it, the more an unbearable itch began creeping up. Roughly, she tugged her shirt back down.

 

“Camilla... must be... ...this way.” It was harder than she had remembered to make her mouth move properly. Her tongue felt swollen and painful. It was only when she closed her mouth that she could taste the sticky, metallic tang of blood. She must've bitten into it when she had seized. Breathing deeply to try and calm both her body and mind, Nerr began walking. It was hard enough to focus on putting one foot in front of the other, but the sudden sound of angry cries and violent clashes from the other side of the sewer drew her attention. For whatever reason- a sudden signal, or perhaps, the building tension finally reaching it's breaking point- both sides had descended on each other, their blades gleaming in the murky light as arcs of blood followed their paths. It looked less like a battle and more like a bloodbath.

“Big sister!” Tearing her eyes away from the carnage, Nerr turned to see Elise running towards her, her clothes and hair disheveled and face streaked with tears.

“Elise! What--”

“I got away from Camilla! She won't listen to me; you have to make her stop, you have to-- AHHH!!!” A dark shadow had overtaken her, and the youngest Nohrian royal had time to do nothing but scream as an even darker blur swooped down on her, engulfing her in a cloak. Fear and rage boiled in Nerr's mind.

 

“ELISE!!!” Pain forgotten, she charged forward, trying and failing to draw the Yato. The deafening clamor of hoof beats filled the catacombs like thunder, and a chestnut destrier leapt over Elise's mystery abductor. An arrow whizzed by her head, and the Hoshidans had to throw themselves out of the way to avoid being struck with it.

“That was your warning shot; next one's going right between your eyes.” That voice sounded almost... familiar.

“Selena. I have Princess Elise. Stage one is complete. I will return her to Lady Camilla and--”

“NOOO!!! Lemme go, lemme go!!!” The robed figure had stood with Elise in tow, though it seemed to be having a great deal of trouble holding onto the thrashing princess given that they were nearly the same size. ' _Selena...'_ That name sounded familiar, too. As Nerr looked up to the mounted soldier, the first thing she noticed was long, bright red hair. She knew that hair. That was the same hair that had run her through in Chevalier, the same hair that had worked with Hans and let him escape. The smaller soldier, still wrestling to keep Elise under control, had short blue hair like Azura... or Flora... Hair that had been burnt to ash because _this_ hair was working with the monsters that brought death to everything they touched. Hatred and anger made her stomach clench in pain, and she doubled over.

 

“Nerr? What is it, are you alrigh--” She did not even give Azura a chance to express her concern, charging forward and launching herself at the girl on the horse. Selena couldn't even fumble with her bow before a mass of scales, horns and claws descended on her, knocking her from her saddle and onto the hard stone ground below. Her face blanched as tendrils of thin, watery saliva dripped onto her face.

“Oh gods, we screwed up...” Was all she could mutter, her voice high with fear, before Nerr set upon her. This was just a warm up for what she would do to Hans, she told herself as she attempted to tear apart the girl below her. Behind her, there were screams and shouts and the clang of metal striking metal, but they barely penetrated the haze of fury she felt.

_“_ _You were working with Hans! You were working with that MURDERER!!!”_

“I had orders!!” The girl below her barely had time to squeak out a weak excuse before Nerr's hardening jaw snapped on her raised forearm. She could feel the bones snap beneath the layers of muscle and leather. A pain filled shriek cut through the air, blending seamlessly with the high, sputtered sobs coming from somewhere to her left.

 

She didn't care about any of the noise; her mind was completely blank, running on an animal instinct. That was probably why she didn't feel the surge of the Dragon Vein until the flames washed over her. Her skin blistered and singed, but her pain must have been negligible compared to the the others, judging by their screams. Nerr clamped down harder on the arm in her mouth, biting through the pain just as she had when Jakob and Gunther used to set her broken bones. She could not breathe, the surge of heat threatening to roast her alive, but it seemed the gods took pity on her, for the flames soon stopped. Releasing Selena's mangled arm, the princess slowly looked up.

 

The dirty stones were blackened with soot, the stone crumbling into cinders in some places. Hazarding a glance behind her, she could barely see through the cloud of steam. Sakura was cowering behind Azura, who seemed to have use her water magic to form a somewhat protective barrier around them, judging by the way she struggled to remain standing. It must not have been large enough to protect the others, because they were desperately trying to put out their still smoldering clothes. Most of Takumi's long ponytail was gone, leaving singed, frizzy strands just brushing his shoulders. Hinoka alone seemed relatively unscathed, and though she was covered in blisters, she wasted no time in running towards Beruka, who still held Elise. Freeing one hand, she pulled a heavy ax from the depths of her smoking cloak and swung it as the Hoshidan princess brought down the flaming edge of her Amaterasu. The weight of ax was more than enough to deflect the blow.

 

“The Hoshidans must not be allowed to survive.” Her voice was a monotonous drone, as if the frenzied pegasus knight trying to take off her head was no more than a pesky mosquito. “I must complete my mission. Then Nerr will return and Lady Camilla will smile again...”

“No!! I won't let you take her away again! I'll kill you first!!” Hinoka's swings grew more frantic and, perhaps frightened by how close they were coming to her head, Elise renewed her attempts to get away. There was so much commotion going on that the second, smaller fireball caught them just as unawares as the first. It detonated right beside the sparing women, knocking them both off balance. With her captor momentarily distracted, Elise pushed her away, dashing over to Nerr. She grabbed her sister's malformed arm and tugged, trying to no avail to pull her off of the now still soldier. She wasn't dead; Nerr could hear her pulse racing, the sound of blood pumping so strongly echoing in her mind and making her mouth water.

 

“Henning! Big sister, please, _stop it!_ Get up, _stop!!”_ The older girl had been just about to push her sister away when the slow but steady clack of heels on stone gave her pause. Everything was still desaturated, but she didn't need to see the lilac of Camilla's hair to recognize her sister. Though... it would have helped. It would have been reassuring to see _something_ familiar in this deranged creature slowly staggering towards her. The elder princess's steps were uneven, her holy ax dragging on the ground as she trudged towards them, frost trailing behind her. She stopped, swaying unsteadily as she looked down at Nerr, her visible eye wide and glossy.

 

“...how disappointing. I wanted you to be dealt with before I slaughtered all your little friends... Oh well. I'll just have to do it myself..!” With movements faster than one would've expected from such a seemingly sluggish woman, the Nohrian princess raised her ax high above her head, bringing it down. Nerr could only just pull her head out of the way, but the silvery edge made contact with one of her horns, freezing it on impact. The force behind the blow shattered it, and Selena cried out as the sharp curved protrusion landed on her face.

“Nerr! Are you alright?!” Azura rushed over, stumbling once or twice as the other girl recoiled, leaping to her feet and attempting to put some distance between her and her manic sister. There was no pain, just the very deep-seated discomfort of feeling that something _should_ hurt. Elise had run over to Camilla, desperately attempting to quell this sister's murderous impulses as well.

“Camilla, what are you doing!? Stop it! That's Nerr you're attacking!”

 

“I know, sweetie. But she's being very naughty, helping these byak savages and putting you in danger like this.” She swung again, a wide, careless swing who's momentum nearly turned her around. Her hair was falling in her face, but Nerr could see that her lips were twisted into a rictus grimace that almost passed for a smile. “My little birdie has come home. Now I just need to clip her wings so she can't ever fly away again...!” The older woman swung again and again, aiming her attacks lower, one blow coming desperately close to nicking Nerr's shins. With a primal cry, Hinoka ran past the desperately dodging girl in a blur of white and crimson, raising her nageyari high and driving it deep into Camilla's hip through the large gaps in her gilded faulds. With a cry of pain, the older woman dropped to one knee, but refused to give up so easily. Injured as she was, she continued swinging her blade, overextending her arm to try and slash at the Hoshidan's legs. Nerr reached out with her elongated arm, the jagged maw at the end of it closing over Camilla's gauntlet, the taste of steel reaching her just the same as if she'd had closed her proper mouth over it.

 

“ _Camilla. STOP. Unless you want to loose this arm...”_

“Fine! Do it! I don't care! The Hoshidans have taken everything else already- you and Azura, Leo, Elise- just kill me now and be done with it!!” The older princess's enraged screams slowly dissolved into weak, anguished sobs as she dropped her Artemis, the holy steel hitting the ground with a dull clunk. Even though she knew it was foolish, Nerr hesitantly released her grip on her arm, her own arm slowly returning to it's normal size.

“ _Call off your troop_ _s_ _, Camilla._ _Enough lives have been lost here today.”_ The lilac haired woman remained still, silent. “ _Camilla... stop being petulant and think about this...”_ Even though her jaw was reforming, her voice still carried a tone of condemnation. Beruka, and a wincing Selena, approached their liege.

 

“What are your orders, milady? Do we continue fighting the Hoshidans?” The smaller one asked, her inflection never changing. For a long moment, Nerr was certain Camilla was going to give them the order to take no prisoners, because Nohrians would not bow to Hoshidans, but in that moment, Elise rushed over, throwing her arms around the other woman's neck and squeezing her tightly.

“Big sister... _please..._ please, just stop... make it stop...” Her soft voice was tearful, almost inaudible over the continuous clashing across the sewer. Little by little, it seemed Camilla's resolve was waning. She hung her head, looking as though she had just been handed a death sentence. Perhaps, as far as she was concerned, she had.

 

“...Selena. Beruka. Go give the order to ceasefire. If the Hoshidans continue their assault—”

“You may rest assured they will not.” Ryouma interjected staunchly. “Hinoka, Takumi; you give the order to our soldiers as well.”

“But--!!” It was clear Hinoka did not have any desire to make their side back down, but the high prince's cold gaze brooked no refusal. As the four soldiers made their way to the other side of the fighting, Camilla slumped forward, only Elise's grip on her keeping her from hitting the sooty floor face first. Now that Nerr's vision was in color once more and her mind was not in a tizzy of panic, the exhaustion the older woman felt was clearer than ever. She sighed softly into the mussed blonde hair before her.

 

“So this is what it's come down to... watching what's left of my family get taken away from me in the sewers... like trash... ...my mother was right about me.”

“Camilla, don't talk like that! You aren't losing anything!”

“Princess Elise is right, Princess Camilla. We are not kidnappers; we have no intention of holding any member of your family hostage.” At Ryouma's words, the Nohrian woman looked up, her eyes squinting slightly in the dim light as though she couldn't quite see him. Slowly, she began to laugh, a quiet giggle that soon grew to a full blow guffaw, though there was no mirth in her voice.

“That would be so much easier to believe if one of your kidnapping victims wasn't standing not three feet from you, Prince Ryouma. It's downright adorable how you condemn us for doing things, then turn around and do them yourself.”

 

“Camilla.” Nerr's cold tone cut through her sister's mockery. “This is not the time to lambaste the Hoshidans for their hypocrisy. Elise is not being kidnapped.”

“Well... what of Leo? The last I saw of him, he was headed to deal with your merry band of Hoshidans in the Woods of the Forlorn, and he hasn't returned since. What have you all done with _him!?_ ” Azura stepped forward, though a considerable amount of distance still remained between her and her sister-in-law.

“When last we saw Leo, he was alive and well, heading back north. If he has not returned home, that is of his own volition.” Camilla's eye narrowed as she regarded the bluenette.

“As if you wouldn't lie about this... You have no love for us. When offered the chance to return home, you rebuked it- rebuked _us!_ I wouldn't be surprised if _you_ killed Leo and threw his body into a ditch to rot...!” Azura flinched at her harsh words, prompting Nerr to move between the two women, as if she could somehow act as shield against Camilla's vitriol.

 

“But I wouldn't. I wouldn't lie about that. And when I say Leo was alive and well when we parted ways, I know you believe me, sister.” Still, the older woman seemed doubtful. Elise gave her shoulders a rough shake.

“Snap out of it, Camilla! I can't really vouch for Azura, but this is Nerr we're talking about! You know she wouldn't lie to us! And I'm _not_ being kidnapped! I'm just going with them to help them persuade Father and Xander to end the war peacefully.”

“Oh, Elise...” She reached up, gently brushing a lock of hair from her little sister's face. “Sweetie, you know that's not possible...”

“No I don't! You don't know anything isn't possible until you try! I want the fighting to stop! I want our soldiers to all come back! I want their families to be reunited; I want _our_ family to be reunited!! ...isn't that what we all want? To be a family again...?”

“...I don't know, darling...” She glanced up at Nerr, her eye dark, searching. “ _Is_ it?”

 

“...I can't live where I'm not welcome, Sister. And the moment I realized King Garon had sent me to my death, I knew I was no longer welcome under his reign. If Xander were king--”

“But Xander is _not_ king, and will not be for a very long time, dearest.” Nerr's jaw tightened.

“Then you will be alone, watching everything around you fall apart _for a very long time_ , Sister. Your father has already chased away four members of your family; how many more can you stand to lose?” Camilla flinched at her icy words. It felt like a disgusting, despicable thing to do, trying to turn a daughter against her father, but Nerr knew she was right. Azura had refused to return to him, Elise had run away from him, even Leo, it seemed, no longer wanted to return. It appeared that Garon now thought of his children the same way as he thought of his soldiers; expendable. The Nohrian princess reached out with her good arm, resting it atop her sister's head. Her words were softer now, in an attempt to ease the sting of her harsh warning.

 

“If one day there is peace... then we can be a family again. It can go back to the way it was before.” She knew she was lying through her teeth, but if that was the only way she could continue unhindered, then so be it. Camilla's tired gaze brightened slightly.

“Oh... I've dreamed of that for so long... Just imagine, our whole family, back together. We could have a picnic! And there would be games and food and...” She trailed off, her words slurring a bit. Elise's eyes widened in fear.

“Big sister? What is it, what's wrong?” Without another word, the older princess went limp, nearly crushing Elise with her dead weight. Nerr rushed forward, and surprisingly, so did Ryouma, taking a knee beside the women. The Hoshidan prince tilted his enemy's head back a bit, pressing two fingers to the underside of her jaw, his brows furrowed.

 

“Her pulse is a bit weak, but it's still strong, and she's breathing normally as well. It seems perhaps she's simply overtired.”

“B-but she'll be okay, right?!” The man got back to his feet, gazing back along the width of the sewer. There was no more fighting on the other side. It seemed deathly quiet, as though even the rushing water was not as loud as it had once been.

“I'm certain she will be fine.”

“Of course she will be, Elise. This is Camilla we're talking about.” Nerr got up as well, chancing one last glance at her sister. In the back of her mind, a part of her assumed this was just a trick intended to lower her guard. At any second, the older princess was going to spring back to life and attempt to hack her to pieces. She'd said she wanted Nerr to come home, but never specified that she had to be in one piece for that to count. Clenching her jaw, the younger woman continued on, down the walkway to where Camilla had most certainly been lurking earlier. That was probably where the route towards the castle was.

 

“Nerr? Where are you going? What about Camilla?”

“Her retainers will be back soon. Every moment we waste here is another moment for Garon to rally his forces against us.”

“What about our soldiers?” She paused, and glanced back over her shoulder to Ryouma. The way he stood there, looking at her... Shura's words from earlier echoed in her mind, _Can you GET more idealistic than that...?_ The adrenaline that had been surging through her veins and numbing her pain was beginning to run it's course, and the agony of her mangled arm was starting to sink it's teeth into her once more.

 

“... _your_ soldiers, Ryouma. I have a rendezvous in that castle I do not intend to miss.” She turned and began walking once more. It was not as though she could go very far on her own- she did not know the way, but a few moment alone while they tallied the dead and tended to the living, just to clear her head a bit, would do her wonders. _We can be a family again,_ she'd told Camilla. It was so, _so_ easy to lie and tell her siblings what they wanted to hear. Had they felt the same, when they told her that Father cared for her, and expected great things from her, and was eager for her to finally leave the citadel? Did they too think kind lies were preferable to the cold truth, or had Garon simply ordered them to feed her what he wanted her to think? Perhaps she could ask him. If this was going to be the last time she saw him, she deserved some answers.

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A/N- UUUUUGGGGHHHH!!! This chapter. Gave. Me. HELL!!!! It was impossible from the get go. I have never, NEVER had THIS much difficulty writing ANYTHING before. Ugh. But I gotta give mad props to my girl LuminousxRuin, who helped me brainstorm this when I was about to throw in the towel and call it quits. Show her some love and go read her Fates fic too if you can (over on FFN). I'm sorry if this isn't up to muster compared to anything else I've written thus far (not like THAT bar is very high), but I just could not deal with this much longer. Every second I wasted on this chapter was a second I was forgetting things I wanted to put in the next few chapters. It'll get better, y'all, I 


	22. Scarred Slope of Battered Hill

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Ch. 22- “Scarred Slope of Battered Hill”

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Casualties had been high on both sides of the battle in the cavernous sewer. More than a third of Hoshido's decidedly paltry forces had been slaughtered, but they certainly gave as good as they got, killing a great deal of the Nohrian soldiers as well. Many who were not dead were still in no condition to continue moving forward, their injuries too severe to be healed with simple staves, many of them too serious to bear anything but amputation. Nerr wondered if she would be on the same short list as she consistently tried and failed to ball her fingers into a fist. Sakura and a very huffy Elise had worked together, trying to channel their magic into the decimated meat and bone of her right arm. And while the flesh no longer looked like it had gone through a sausage grinder, it seemed the damage was much worse than she had initially thought. A sharp pain radiated up her neck, and the amount of concentration it took just to make her fingers twitch was giving her a migraine. She leaned against the sewer's wall, breathing hard, the slick mildew dampening her sweater.

 

“Hey.” She looked up, feeling her pulse thud in her head at the tiniest movement. Their hired guide was approaching her. The others had fallen a bit behind, Elise remaining closer to them. “I don't know what you're planning on doing once you get in the castle, but you sure as hell ain't gonna be doing it with a bum sword arm. Maybe you need to slow down a little.”

“Maybe _you_ need to shut the hell up and mind your own gods damned business.” She snapped churlishly. Shura merely scoffed at her contempt.

“Hey, don't get mad at _me_ , princess; I'm just tellin' it how it is. You _know_ they're probably going to have to chop that arm off, right?”

“Then it gets 'chopped off'. If that's all...?” The deposed daimyo frowned at her, though his expression was more thoughtful than angry.

 

“...what's your deal, ladyship?” It was Nerr's turn to frown, in no small part due to his new nickname for her. _What is it, my little ladyship...?_ Her stomach churned.

“What are you talking about now?”

“I just said you're likely going to need amputation. _Amputation_. That means completely removing your arm.”

“I am well aware of what 'amputation' means, sir; no doubt I'm more educated than you are.”

 

“Then why the fuck aren't you freaking out? I've seen people get more upset hearing that it's gonna rain! If the rebels and Hoshidans had _half_ your drive to get in that castle, Garon would be waving a white flag from behind his throne. I don't get it; you clearly love the monarchy. Why are you so crazy about this?” Nerr stared long and hard into the thief's dark eyes. He hadn't fought the Nohrian soldiers (he'd made it clear he was not invested in the Hoshidans' cause, after all), but she had spied him helping tend to the injured. A smudge of drying blood was flaking off his right temple. She was trying to figure out a way to put her thoughts into words he could understand. She sighed deeply, settling for the best way she could think of.

 

“What Kotaro did to you...” Nerr whispered slowly. “Garon did to me. Perhaps he did not burn my home to the ground... but then again, for all I know, perhaps he did. Perhaps he was that desperate to erase any and all trace of my existence from his memory. He killed my people. He destroyed my family. ...knowing that he draws breath while they don't makes me sick. I wanted to be a Nohrian soldier, and he took that from me. I wanted to love someone, and he took _that_ from me, too. He turned my brothers and sisters against me... and even if they see through all the lies he's told them, I will never, _ever_ be welcomed here again! You think I care if I lose an _arm?_ I have lost _everything_ that matters, I will _never_ get any of that back again! I don't care if I have to flop on my belly and lunge at that monster with my teeth- I will see him dead or die trying!” She puffed and panted, her rage physically exhausting her. Shura had remained utterly silent, watching her with growing eyes.

 

“...you're something else when you're pissed, you know that? You, uh... you got somethin' right here...” he tapped his own forehead, and Nerr reached up instinctively with her right hand, her limp fingers catching on the sharp points of the horns protruding from her skin. The right one was still rough where it had broken off. Although it was terrifying to think that a part of her had been hacked off, it didn't actually bother her, mostly because it hadn't hurt. It was like cutting her nails, or hair- it was just an unfeeling something that was shorter now. Shura was still staring at her head, and she was too tired to tell him how rude that was. “Does that _always_ happen when you're mad?”

“Yes.” She said shortly. Azura had told her the dragonstone her mother had left to her was supposed to contain her dragon form, but it seemed to be doing a poor job of it. She wasn't particularly upset by the fact, though. Those partial transformations had been a boon so many times, often supplementing otherwise crippled limbs-- The thought hit her so suddenly that her gasp sounded more like a wounded badger, and it was more than enough to draw the attention of the Hoshidans drawing closer. Elise and Azura were the first to express their fear and-or concern.

 

“Big sister? Was that you?”

“Is something wrong, Nerr?”

“No, for the first time, something is right. I can fix my arm.”

“What?” The songstress frowned deeply. “But Sakura said--”

“I have to make it transform, like the other one.”

“... _can_ you?” That threw Nerr for a loop. She was certain she _could_ ; after all, it seemed every other part of her body was ready to shift into something unhuman at a moment's notice, but the problem was, it was never something that she spurred of her own volition. It just... _happened_ , completely independent of her intentions, when she was frightened or angry. The Nohrian princess looked back over at the small crowd of Hoshidans and Nohrians.

 

“I need you all to make me angry.”

“You're a bitch, and nobody likes you.” Takumi supplied so quickly she was certain that was going to be his response regardless of what she had asked.

“I appreciate the thought, Takumi, but I don't care enough about your opinion for your words to hurt me.” she told him sincerely. “Anyone else?”

“That is enough.” Ryouma said sharply. “We do not have time to waste standing here and insulting you. The Nohrian castle, and King Garon, are somewhere above us, and we need to continue moving before _he_ realizes that as well.” With those stern words, the high prince marched past her, the few remaining soldiers under his command falling in step behind him. As the second prince passed her, he whispered just loud enough for Nerr to pick up.

 

“You look like a really stupid prostitute.”

“Thank you, Takumi.” Well, at least someone was trying to help her, albeit in the worst looking way. Given that they drew closer to the source of her hatred and rage with each step, Nerr was certain she would not have to wait long to once again be consumed with rage. How sad, that a girl who had once been almost impossible to anger was now left with such a short, ever-lit fuse. If Gunther could see her now... he'd be so disappointed to know that she was a slave to her emotions... _He'd be proud; he wanted you to be strong, and if hate makes you strong..._ The Nohrian princess paused mid-step. That... was not a thought she expected herself to have. Especially not as a satisfied, near gleeful thought.

 

“...I must be losing my damn mind...” She whispered to herself, setting off at a brisk trot to make her way back to the head of the small battalion.

000

 

The further they walked, the darker and more desolate the path became. Despite it's size, the darkness made the tunnel feel claustrophobic. Sakura was the first to voice concerns.

 

“Th-this doesn't really feel like it should be p-part of a castle. I-I-I think we might have made a wr-wrong turn somewhere...”

“Don't worry, girl; this is the right way.” Shura said confidently.

“Really?” Even Nerr could not keep the skepticism from her voice. Everything about this shortcut seemed too good to be true. An abandoned tunnel leading them straight into one of Krakenburg's courtyards? Azura quickened her pace a bit, falling in step beside the other princess.

“Believe it or not, I actually remember this part of the tunnel. There should be sconces up ahead and-- ah! See?” She pointed to the iron hanging mounted to the walls, their torches long since snuffed out. “I think we're getting close.” Ryouma seemed much less assured.

 

“I suppose it's comforting to know we haven't been led into a trap, although this certainly looks like a dead end.” The high prince stopped walking, and it was clear why. It seemed their path had been cut short, a solid wall keeping them from progressing. Shura laughed under his breath.

“Don't they got a saying about not judging a book by it's cover back in Hoshido? There's stairs on the other side, genius. Gods, it's no wonder the royals never closed this way off; they know everyone's too stupid to notice an exit when it's right in front of 'em.” Nerr's hands balled into fists, at least, her left hand. The heart of Nohrian power was almost directly above them. She would enjoy reaching into Garon's chest and squeezing that heart until it exploded. Taking a few steps forward, she turned back to the Hoshidans.

“All of you charging in at once is suicidal. I'll take a quick look around.”

 

“I'll come with you.” Ryouma did not wait for her response, walking past her and squeezing through a gap between the two walls. Nerr followed him, wincing as her injured shoulder caught between her and the slick stone. There were in fact stairs on the other side, narrow and steep, leading up to a small landing. The princess climbed them as quickly as she could, pushing past her blood brother, and keeping herself from throwing open the heavy door she encountered only by reminding herself that there were undoubtedly soldiers on the other side of it. A _lot_ of soldiers, by the sound of it. She frowned deeply, pressing her ear to the rough wood. That was an awful lot of commotion for a courtyard. Ryouma had finally caught up to her, having to remain a few steps below her as the landing was not wide enough for them both.

 

“What is it, sister? What do you hear?”

“...yelling. Lots of yelling. ...I'm not certain how lively things get in Krakenburg, but that sounds much too loud to be a typical courtyard...”

“Do you think it's a trap?” At once, his hand went to the gilded hilt of his Raijinto. Nerr shook her head, closing her eyes to try and concentrate on the sounds. There were so many it was impossible to differentiate one from the next.

“If it was a trap, they'd be quiet to lure us into a false sense of security. I don't think this has anything to do with us...” Her curiosity was eating away at her. It was extremely difficult to push the door open with her left arm, simply because she was not used to using that side of her body as anything more than a counterweight. Had Ryouma not been there to help her push the rusted hinges into action, she doubted she would've gotten it to move at all. It only opened a crack, but that was enough for her to see. Compared to the all enveloping darkness of the tunnel, the gentle dark of night was positively bright, and Nerr had to blink several times to allow her eyes to adjust. What she saw when she did made her stomach sink. There were dozens, quite possibly even hundreds, of soldiers outside, each of them armed and in full armor. Leaning over her to look out as well, the fear in Ryouma's voice was palpable.

 

“This isn't a courtyard... it's some kind of training ground!”

“What's going on up there?” Both royals looked down to see Azura and Shura at the base of the stairs. The high prince snarled, nearly running down the steps in his haste to grab the thief by his collar, slamming him into the wall.

“You! This is your doing; you've lead us straight into a trap!”

“What the fuck are you talking about, princeling; I said I'd get you to the courtyard and I did. And you'd better get your hands off me before you lose them...” Azura was less angry, but just as confused.

 

“What are you talking about, Ryouma? Shura is right; this way leads to a courtyard. I remember it.”

“Then why did you fail to inform us of the legions of soldiers who guarded it?!”

“... _what?”_ At once, the songstress dashed up the steps as well. Nerr moved aside to allow her to look out, and the bluenette woman gasped. Her eyes were wide with terror when she turned around once more. “It wasn't like that, I swear! It was just a normal courtyard; there weren't even any guards patrolling! Oh gods, what fresh hell is _this?_ ”

“Calm down, Azura.” Despite her words, and even her tone, Nerr herself didn't feel exactly calm. “It was probably just converted into a training ground. The army always has an influx of recruits when there's fighting going on, and those recruits have to be trained _somewhere_. It's not as if they've noticed us. We just need to backtrack and--”

 

“What the fuck are you retards doing?!” A loud, rough voice cut through the clash of swords, as well as through her rational thought. Without even thinking, she shoved Azura aside and glued herself to the small crack in the door once more, her eye darting frantically as she tried to find the source of the voice. She could hear it getting louder, and easy task now that the entirety of the amassed soldiers had stopped in their tracks. “This is a Full! Contact! Exercise I want to see _real blood_ , you fucking pussies! Got it!?”

“Y-yes sir!” Came the clearly uncertain yet frightened response, and once again, the mock fighting began, though it was much less mock this time around. Nerr continued scanning the small patch of courtyard she could see, desperately seeking-- yes! _There!_ There was Hans in all his loathsome glory. His armor looked much better maintained than it had the last time she'd seen him, the leather plates well oiled. They were probably new, right along with the sumptuous pelts that lined them. She couldn't imagine a beast like Hans willfully spending money on armor. The soldiers' uncomfortable affirmation came back to the forefront of her mind.

 

“...' _sir'..._?!” Since when was a miserable nobody like him in a position of authority?! She had been so caught up in her seething that she hadn't even noticed Ryouma come up behind her until she felt him press against her as he too looked out once more.

“...hmm... I suppose _that_ must be the commander of this group. I recognize him. He was with the Nohrian royals in Chevalier.” The prince pulled back, sighing deeply. “I suppose you're right, Nerrida. We need to fall back-- Nerrida? What the hell are you doing?!” She did not pay attention to his words, instead focusing all her attention on throwing her weight against the door to further open it. Every time she hit it, she could feel her flesh bruise, but it opened another quarter inch, which was enough to encourage her that it was working.

“Nerr, stop it! You're going to get us noticed!” Azura tried to pull her away, but she angrily pushed the girl away. Ryouma caught her before she could go tumbling down the stairs.

 

“Good. I _want_ to get noticed. I _want_ that festering piece of shit to see me, because I'll be the last thing he _ever_ sees.”

“Sister, this is not like you. Think rationally--”

“Fuck 'rationally', Ryouma! That-- that _thing_ killed the person I loved most in the world _right in front of me!!_ You do whatever you want. I'm going out there, turning into a dragon, and I'm going to eat him alive. I'm going to bring his head to Garon as a _fucking trophy!”_

 

The rage she had been waiting for roiled inside her, spilling out as she drew back and threw herself against the door one last time. It slammed open, far enough for her to rush out. The sudden appearance of this strange, feral creature in their midst was enough to give the assembled soldiers pause. It was only when she could see the full scope of the courtyard that she realized it was unlike anything she'd ever associated with a “courtyard” before. It merely consisted of a platform hanging freely over the massive crater Castle Krakenburg had been built into. Stairways were attached to it, leading to the various walkways that intersected the castle like veins, but the clearly didn't provide much support. The only thing keeping it, and the people upon it, from plummeting into the depths of the earth were the massive, discolored chains anchoring it to higher levels. Finally, one boot licking soldier shook himself from his stupor, calling out to the pale man who had wandered off to yell at someone else.

 

“Captain Hans! There's an intruder!!” A cruel chuckle reverberated through the cold night air as Hans turned and began walking back.

“Great! Drag 'em out here; we'll use 'em for tar-- ...get... pract...” His wide, sadistic grin slipped away like water from an oiled pan as he finally noticed who the “intruder” was. The sight of fear in his beady little eyes, the knowledge that _she_ was the cause of that fear, filled Nerr with a giddiness she could not begin to explain. The king's henchman raised a hand to point at her, and she prayed it did not go unnoticed by his soldiers that it was trembling slightly. “... _you..._!!” She smiled widely, so wide it hurt, pulling the stiff scar tissue on her face tighter than it was meant to go.

“Hello, Hans~ Did you miss me? I certainly missed you...”

 

“How the fuck did _you_ get here!?”

“Through the door.” She told him honestly, her voice dripping with honey. Just as he trembled, so too did she, but it was not fear Nerr felt. She shook with barely contained joy, salivating now that the first hurdle towards her peace of mind was finally before her once more. Swallowing the excess of drool that was beginning to leak from the corners of her mouth, she took a step forward. It went unnoticed by no one that Hans took two back in response. “I've been thinking about you nonstop since our rendezvous in Chevalier was cut short. Thinking about how I'm going to kill you. Thinking about how much pain you're going to be in, and how much fun I'm going to have... You _want_ this, don't you? You want this just as badly as I do; that's why you haven't run away yet.” When the burly captain laughed, it sounded more like a nervous yelp than a display of arrogance.

 

“Ha. Ha ha ha... Bwahaha!! You-you-you think I'm afraid? Of _you?!_ Y-you'd threaten me in front of my own battalion?! Oh, I-I'm gonna enjoy this... rip 'er apart, soldiers!” It was clear the majority of Nohrian soldiers had no intention of stepping foot in front of this small girl who causing this much panic in their commander simply by talking to him, but of course, there were those that respected such cowards. One such would-be hero charged at Nerr, his sword raised. Every time she had faced one of her own soldiers, she had been utterly unwilling to raise her blade against them. Now, she could not raise her blade even if she tried... but she could still raise her left arm. The flesh tore as bone elongated into a sharp spear, one that she thrust through the charging soldier's throat. Given that the diameter of her elongated limb was more that the width of the man's neck, the force essentially left him decapitated, his head hanging onto his neck by a few thin strands of skin as he crumpled to the ground like a discarded doll. Several other soldier screamed, their eyes bulging in terror.

“ _What the fuck is that thing!?”_

“It's not human!!” A few even turned and began running towards the stairs, though most were caught by their comrades. Nerr laughed, a hoarse, braying roar that was squeezed uncomfortably from her throat as her vocal cords shifted.

 

“ _Are ALL your soldiers this poorly trained, Hans? Dear dear, what will Father think...?_ ” Whether it was due to her calling out his poor leadership, or else, the knowledge that “his” soldiers clearly did not want to fight for him, Hans was quickly becoming as enraged as she was. The only difference was he was not enjoying it nearly as much.

“Dammit... dammit...!! What the fuck is wrong with you all?! Why are you so scared of this little bitch!? She's just a fucking child! She's all talk! Sacrifice yourselves if need be! For King Garon's glory!” As rousing as he thought his pep talk was, it seemed to have the opposite effect on his soldiers. Many of them shrank further away. One particularly brave soul dared raise his voice.

“B-but Captain--”

“ _What was that, grunt_?” Hans rounded on the woman, the cords in his neck so taut it seemed a miracle they had not strangled him yet. “Please, speak up and I'll relay your comments to King Garon! I'm sure he'll be sympathetic to you and your family.” The soldier's face paled as she shrank away from his threats. “Now shut up and KILL THAT CUNT!!!”

 

Given that it was clear _these_ soldiers obeyed Hans, not out of any respect, but simply fear for their lives and families, Nerr was reluctant to attack them... but she did anyway. As they brought their swords and lances down on her, it was clear they did not see her as someone with a life and family, so it was an easy enough matter to not see _them_ as sympathetic either. With every nick their blades cut into her armor, both steel and organic, it became easier to stop thinking about showing them mercy. Nerr had just closed the tooth lined mouth at the end of her wrist around one soldier's middle, crushing them until their organs began popping out through their skin under the pressure, when a sharp edge hit her in the back of the head. Had her skull not been covered in thick plates, the blade would've cut through the bone and killed her with ease. As it was, it was still a forceful enough blow to knock her to the ground, giving the other soldiers the chance to close in, each one attempting to drive their weapons into the most vital area they could reach. She could barely hear Hans laughing over the sound of angry grunts and blades cutting through the air.

 

“Bwahahaha! _There's_ the pathetic crybaby I remember! All talk, no action; just like your man-whore retainer. Don't let up, soldiers; we've got her right where we want her! Hell, I'll let whoever lands the finishing blow fuck her to death- you know that pussy's nice and tight!” She could've been disgusted by his crude language, or even horrified that the offer of such a reward seemed to spur many of the soldiers into redoubling their efforts, but she wasn't.

 

Nerr barely noticed what he had said, too infuriated with him even mentioning Gunther. She threw her head back, screaming in both pain and fury as her limbs twisted, muscle coiling around the bones like steel, threatening to snap them. But they did not break, only growing longer and sharper. Using the soldier's temporary shock, she drove her distended right arm up, straight into the underside of one's jaw. The limb retracted as soon as it hit bone, the body falling to the ground in a heap. Other soldiers scrambled over one another in their desperation to get out of range of her thrashing limbs. She did not care who she cut down or how, her mind only focusing on clearing enough space around her to get back to her feet. By that time, Ryouma and Azura had made their way out into the courtyard as well. Nerr was surprised. She sincerely thought they had gone back to find another route. She wouldn't have faulted them for it; far from it, it would've earned them more respect. But she had no concern to spare for them, not when Hans was unhooking an ax from his belt. She cracked her stiff neck, the sound even louder in her ears, as she trudged towards him.

 

“ _Do you still think I'm pathetic,_ _H_ _ans? Believe me; the only corpse that's going to be fucked around here is_ _ **yours**_.” The muscular man chuckled dryly.

“Ooh, look who's finally learned to talk like a real Nohrian soldier. I'm sure Daddy's so proud of you. Well, you ain't the only one who's stronger, girlie. I'm the newest general in the Nohrian Royal Army; lemme show you how I got my promotion!!” He charged at her, though Nerr was hardly going to be taken unawares by a frontal attack. She aimed the deadly point that had once been her fingers directly at his face. What surprised her was how much more agile he had become since she'd last seen him. He dodged her attack, swinging his ax wildly, cutting a deep gouge into the side of her face. She kicked out, her foot connecting with his chest and pushing him back, but he recovered faster than she did, leaping back towards her with a renewed blood lust.

 

She could block his ferocious attacks with ease, but they left her no room to parry. A boot hooked around her ankles, tugging her feet out from under her and knocking her back to the cracked stone floor. Hans looked more like a demon than a man as he bared his teeth at her in a sad imitation of a smile. He stepped on her middle, pinning her down as he lifted his ax high above his head. Nerr kicked and beat at him as she tried to get away, but she may as well have had a pin through her, as ineffectual as her struggles were. She could see the gleaming ax coming down on her... and then she couldn't. She couldn't see anything but a blinding white that seemed to engulf everything. A loud squelching sound spurred her to blink even faster, trying desperately to force her vision to return to normal as something heavy fell onto her chest. Something heavy... and hot... and wet. Even though there were still blinding spots bursting before her eyes, she could make out the felid form atop her. Scales that had once been mostly white were now predominantly red as purplish entrails slid out of the massive slash on her belly, soaking Nerr's clothes and armor in blood.

 

 _“_ _LILITH!!!”_ She tried to scream aloud even as she screamed in her mind, but the only sound she could manage was a garbled squeal.

“Aw, stupid giraffe...!” Hans sneered at the tiny creature before his wicked smirk fell back into place. “Don't worry; I won't miss again-- gah!!” The hulking man cried out as an arrow lodged deep in his bulging pectoral muscles. Nerr chanced a look back as he ineffectively tried to pull it free. Shura was pulling another arrow from his quiver, even as the Hoshidans ran out. Panic seemed to wash over the training grounds, the older soldiers readying their weapons while new recruits shied away, clearly not ready to face actual combat yet. Giving up and simply breaking off the arrow's shaft, Hans pulled his lips back into a snarl as he too noticed the Hoshidans. “Fucking byak savages... SOLDIERS!! Take no prisoners!!” At once, the battle erupted, with Nohrians falling onto the Hoshidans in droves. Amidst the chaos, the would be commander slipped into the crowd, disappearing. The soft patter of bare feet could hardly be heard over the battle cries and clash of blade.

 

“Nerr! Are you alright?!” Gingerly, the Nohrian princess lifted Lilith from her chest, noticing how labored her breathing was and feeling bile rise in her gorge as the coils of intestines stuck slightly to her armor. She handed the tiny dragon to Azura, paying the songstress's distress no mind.

 _“Get someone to heal her. Lilith...”_ She looked down at the glossy golden eyes and silently gaping mouth, her heart wrenching. She gently brushed Lilith's face with base of the spear tip her right hand had become. _“Don't worry, Lilith. You're going to be fine. I'm gonna kill that son of a bitch...!”_ Sparing her equerry one last glance, Nerr got to her feet, taking off after Hans. The other soldiers were not her concern. They were busying themselves with the Hoshidans, and the Hoshidans were fighting back as ferociously as possible. She could see the after image of Raijinto as Ryouma cut down two ax wielding soldiers from the corner of her eyes. Hinoka dodged an arrow, hurling her Amaterasu at the archer and pulling it back as it lodged in his chest.

 

One massively tall berserker stood in her way, ax raised and ready to drop on her the moment she came within range. Nerr did not slow down, dropping and sliding between the man's legs, too low for him to reach. Passing him, she drove her foot, the flesh of which had tightly coiled it into a sharp point, into his muscular thigh. Crying out in pain, the berserker dropped to his knee, even as more soldiers ran at her. The princess dodged the first sword swung at her head, thrusting both arms elbow deep into the gut of the poor woman and using her still writhing body as a shield against the other sword. She hurled the body at the other man, barely paying attention as they both skittered dangerously close to the edge. The berserker was trying to get back to his feet. Nerr swung her arm, the sharpened point of her fingertips slicing deep enough into his muscular neck to sever his spine. She was already running after Hans again before his corpse hit the ground. A barrage of spears rained from the sky as wyvern lords flew down, closing in on the Hoshidans. A tingle of magical energy through the ground preluded a massive whirlwind pulling the fliers into it's depths and tossing them back out. Some dragons hit the training ground, leaving bloody smears as their wings tore off, their riders in no better shape, while others simply fell into the depths of the crater.

 

She vaulted over one broken rider, pausing for a split second to get her bearing. Everything wavered in her desaturated vision, pulsing in time to her heartbeat. Even in the open air, the stench of blood and sweat and filth both human and dragon was overwhelming. She let her bony mandible fall open, trying to catch her breath even though it seemed to have little effect. However, while she could breathe no better that way, everything _smelled_ stronger. It was enough to make her gag, but at the same time, there was a combination of horrid smells that stood out amidst the rest of the fetor. If she had lips, she would've smiled as she took off again. Several cavaliers stood between her and Hans, each of them charging at her with lances and swords drawn. Her hand grew larger and larger. It would've been too heavy to lift had she not already been in the process of swinging her arm as it happened. It collided with the destriers like a cannonball, the spike protuberances jutting from her knuckles puncturing their barding and tearing into the horses as it knocked them and their riders off the edge of the platform. She could feel her muscles spooling back into her arm as it returned to it's normal size. Hans took a step back. There were stairs behind him, narrow as they were, but running away would've meant turning his back on her, and even he was not that stupid. He shifted his grip on his ax.

 

“Hehehe... I finally get to finish the job. My ax is waiting for that pretty little head of-- fuck!!” She had not waited for him to finish taunting her, instead charging at him, knocking his weapon away before he could swing it. She was not trained in hand to hand combat- her weapon's training had focused almost exclusively on swords, but she had grappled with Leo enough in her youth to know how to punch someone in the face. Only one of her hands even remotely resembled a fist, and every blow from her right arm left a deep, bloody hole. Nerr smashed her elbow into his solar plexus, knocking him to the ground and providing a better vantage point as she drove the jagged spike of her hand between his legs. His howl of agony was cut short by a swift kick to the face. Her foot was covered in thick plates. His mouth was not, and she could feel his teeth break off at the root. Groaning in pain and desperately clutching at the gaping hole where his manhood used to be, Hans tried to drag himself away from her, back towards the training ground proper, as if his soldiers would protect him. It seemed that they were in fact all looking at him, the fighting seemingly dying down slightly, but no one took a step in his direction. Nerr let him crawl, waiting until he had gotten a few feet away before following, her pace calm and even. Moaning and panting, the pallid captain looked back at her, his face drenched in sweat despite the chill of the night, bloody drool dripping from his swollen lips.

 

“Waih-- waih waih waih!! He cried out to her, holding one arm in a desperate attempt to ward off her advance, his words now garbled by his swollen mouth and missing teeth. “I-it wadn't ma faul! Garah-- he—he _ordur_ me!!” Nerr didn't doubt that for a moment. But she doubted the king had ordered him to _enjoy_ the slaughter he took part in as much as he did. And, regardless of orders, Hans himself had been the one to raise his weapon against both Gunther and Lilith. The princess lifted her leg, the foot screwing into a point before she stomped hard on Hans' side. The flesh tore, blood leaking out heavily, the wound widening as he writhed under her. The smell of hot, fresh blood made her mouth water, saliva dripping from her jaws and darkening the fabric of her sweater. Pulling her foot loose from the muscle with a soft schlicking sound, Nerr descended on him, staring into his eyes for a long moment. They were wide, and brimming with tears of pain... and _fear_. Just like the fear she has seen in Gunther's eyes, the fear of someone who knew they were about to die. He could not tell, but she was smiling, metaphorically grinning ear to ear as lowered her face to the exposed expanse of skin his armor left delightfully uncovered.

 

She sank the protrusions on her mandible into his flesh. Her draconic head seemed ill equipped for eating large prey, so she worked at him with her clawed fingers as well, pulling and ripping him apart to a chorus of screams, not just his but the vast majority of soldiers who looked on as well. She could not chew anything- she had no teeth- but instead swallowed large chunks of skin and flesh and offal as it came loose from his body into her mouth. All the while, Hans continued to struggle against her, hitting and screaming and sobbing, but she paid him little mind. For a moment, it felt as though she was no longer on a battlefield, but back home in the citadel, eating her dinner. It was a feeling that contrasted greatly with the knowledge that she was buried face first inside a man's chest cavity. The flailing had quickly been reduced to shudders, and even they stopped soon enough. It was only when she felt full, actually replete, that she stopped gorging herself and slowly got back to her feet. Hans looked as if his torso had exploded, huge quantities of flesh stripped off his ribs and even spine in some places. Her vision was beginning to return to normal given that she quickly noticed the red of Ryouma's armor as he approached her. He stopped short, eying the corpse on the ground before looking back up at her. Nerr said nothing, too busy trying to retract her horns back into her skull. The high prince wisely stayed silent, instead turning to address the Nohrian soldiers who had all fallen still and silent.

 

“Stand down, Nohrians! Your captain has been defeated! Drop your weapons, and your lives will be spared!” A quiet murmur spread over their ranks.

“She killed captain Hans...”

“ _Killed?_ That crazy bitch _ATE_ him!!”

“What do we do?!”

“I... I think we surrender...”

 

Slowly, each of the surviving Nohrians lowered their weapons to the ground. For a moment, she thought that was the end of it, and they were finally done here, but the memory of Lilith lying there and bleeding as profusely as Hans slammed back into the forefront of her mind. She ran back towards the front of the dragon statue where she had left her with Azura, skidding to a halt. A delicately built, nude woman lay on cold stone between Elise and Sakura, both of whom where holding staves. Nerr slowly approached, giving the scene a wide berth. She could see the massive gash, from which her broken ribs and split organs poked through. Feeling her breath catch in her throat, the princess drew closer, kneeling beside the girl. It had been so long since she had seen Lilith as a human that she had almost forgotten how pretty she was. Her long hair had come loose and her coif was askew, but other than that, everything looked just as it always had. The cloudy unblinking eyes, the translucently scaled skin now mottled with bruises... That was just a... a joke. A prank. An accident?

 

“...Lilith...? Lilith, can you hear me?” She touched the equerry's shoulder, ignoring how cold it felt. That wasn't odd- she was overheated, of course everything else felt cool to the touch. She pulled the girl into her lap as best she could with only one arm that obeyed her. “Lilith, wake up. You-- you should've been healed by now. I killed Hans. I made him pay for hurting you, and Gunther... Wake up... wake up, you're a dragon; you're stronger than this...!” Even as her pleas became more hysterical, her voice grew softer as her throat tightened more and more. Tears burned her eyes, blinding her even as they spilled over, cutting tracks through the blood smeared across her face. Sakura's voice was quiet and tearful as well as she whispered.

 

“I-I'm sorry, nee-sama... we tried...”

“We tried so hard! But we couldn't help her!!” Elise, in comparison, was all but wailing as fat tears dripped from her eyes. Nerr looked back down at the limp figure braced against her. But... but _why_? Why would she have done that- did Lilith not _know_ how desperately she hated loss? She said she had been watching her from her astral whozit- hadn't she seen how Gunther and Flora's deaths had affected her? Hadn't six years been enough time for her to learn that Nerr would never, _never_ want her or anyone else she loved to put themselves in harm's way for _her?_ That was why she had trained for all those years, so she could be _their_ shield and sword; not the other way around! She choked on a sob, tears that she had thought she no longer had wracking her entire body as she howled in misery, blind to the audience that still surrounded her. She could hear voices but they all blended together.

 

“They're giving up Then we're done here We've got a problem What is it Nerrida's fish-thing is... I think it's dead She's not taking it too well” She sobbed louder at those words, barely noticing that her cries now had a chorus as Elise and Sakura began weeping in earnest as well. Elise had known Lilith for years, and though she didn't know the equerry very well, the youngest princess loved everyone. Sakura didn't know her at all, but she was so very empathic. A tiny fragment of her brain screamed rage and hate at her. It was _her_ fault Lilith was dead- if she hadn't been so desperate to take Hans head-on, she could've gotten the drop on him and killed him without him even noticing. But no, she had to make a spectacle out of it. She had to draw it out to make herself feel better, because deep down, she was no better than him. Lilith had stepped in and saved her from her own stupidity. Gods above, what was the point of killing someone if she _still_ couldn't save people from them? What was the point in avenging someone if it only lead to more deaths to avenge? How was this _worth it!?_ She could only answer her self-loathing with another drawn out wail, curling herself around Lilith body. She tried to ignore the steps approaching her, the faint clacking of armor.

 

“Look up, Nerrida.” Ryouma's voice was soft, but she cringed away from it regardless.

“No...”

“Dry your tears, sister. Think about this girl's sacrifice. She gave her life so you could continue fighting. And what are we fighting for? We are fighting for Mikoto-sama and the whole world! Do you think this girl would want you to give up like this?” Nerr's tears stopped, as all the misery inside her coalesced.

“...how _dare_ you...”

“What?” She slowly, gently, lowered Lilith's body back to the cold stone, getting to her feet and turning to face Ryouma. She reared back and drove her fist into his face, the force of her blow knocking him back.

 

“Don't talk about her like you know her!! She's not 'this girl'- she has a name, you bastard! Her name is Lilith, and don't you _ever_ speak it!! Don't make her a martyr for your cause- she didn't know Mikoto; she didn't give a damn about her!! 'She gave her life so you could continue fighting'- 'So you can die for the glory of Hoshido', you mean!! Stop acting like you care- you _**never**_ cared! You've just been trying to trick me into _thinking_ you do so I'll be a good soldier and throw my life away for your cause! I _knew_ I couldn't trust you! Never! Trust! HOSHIDANS!!” She stumbled away from him, sobbing uncontrollably. To think, she had actually begun letting her guard down around him, believing his lies, _trusting_ him. For a few hours, she had actually thought of him as her brother, thinking that he felt the same towards her, but as was his nature, the Hoshidan high prince did not have the forethought to keep from recklessly charging ahead. He dared- he _dared-_ try to use Lilith to further his cause. In a showing of complete situational unawareness, Ryouma approached her yet again, wiping the blood from his mouth. His voice was icy when he spoke, just as it had always been before.

 

“There will be a time for mourning. But that time is not now. Rise up! Stop crying like a child, and get back on your feet! The sacred Yatogami chose _YOU_ , Nerrida. It chose a hero... not a _quitter..._ ” Sucking down gulps of air to try and compose herself, Nerr fumbled for the sword at her side with her left hand. It felt so wrong to even hold it like that, but she still managed to raise it high above her head. The older man took a step back, eying the shining blade warily. She brought it down with all her might, the draconic strength she retained in her semi transformed state driving the blade deep into the stone floor. Cracks spider webbed around the point of impact, and as she took her hand away, it remained standing upright. Ryouma stared at the blade, his face pale with a mixture of horror and rage. Nerr was surprisingly calm as she looked into his eyes, waiting for him to meet her gaze.

“...that's nobody's problem but yours, _brother._ ” If Hoshido needed a hero, it was going to have to find it's own.

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A/N- Aw, man. Now, I know this is short, and nothing but a savage revenge fantasy, but come on- Nerr deserved this, let her have a little closure. Boy, did I not let Lilith have her TL;DR speech. That speech always pissed me off. Like, you're dying. Don't be so loquacious. And Ryouma... Now, I hated Xander's “rousing” speech in Conquest too, but here's the thing; Xander _knew_ Lilith. Perhaps not well, but he clearly knew her. She's one of his little sister's servants, he's probably talked to her on more than one occasion. Ryouma cannot claim that same privilege. Ryouma does not know who Lilith is- he does not say a single word to her or mention her outside of this chapter- and the fact that he would try to attach her sacrifice to Mikoto's (and his own) cause is proof of what an underhanded, manipulative little shit he is. Really, Ryouma is just like, the worst person. It's clear he's going to be _terrible_ for Hoshido, what with his selfishness and manipulation. I mean, Tacomeat's _bad,_ but he's a stupid, moody teenager- I _expect_ him to be bad. Ryouma is clearly a grown man. Really, he and Xander are both just _awful_ people to put into a position of power (Xander even more so). And, while I know the Yato Ex Machina is _super_ important to the plot for whatever reason, it's really not if you look at it from a gameplay perspective. Like, if the only thing it's useful against is Anankos, you don't really need it in the the routes he doesn't show up in. But I actually have a head canon that makes the Yato pretty important to the plot, even if it doesn't need to ever be wielded, either in the game _or_ in this fic.


	23. Silent Sorrow

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Ch. 23- “Silent Sorrow”

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“ _I never wanted all this...”_

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The Nohrian soldiers did not attempt to stop them as they made their way towards the castle. They were too busy tending to their injured and collecting their dead. The thought of leaving Lilith behind was too much to bear, and Elise had to drag her from the equerry's stiffening body. A large group would've been suspicious in the castle, and while they had been lucky on the training grounds, facing a crowd of guards within Krakenburg would've been disastrous. Ryouma, Scarlet and Silas opted to scout ahead, following Shura to see just how difficult the path to the throne room would be. Hinoka, Azura and Takumi talked amongst themselves, discussing their strategy. Nerr had been edging away from them little by little until she found an alcove she could wedge herself into. It was a tight squeeze, but at least it felt safe. Enclosed spaces were safe- the citadel had been safe, Lilith wouldn't have died in the citadel.

 

 _Nerr..._ She pressed her hands over her ears, eyes darting as she tried to see who was calling her. No one was there, they hadn't even noticed she had left. The smell was starting to get worse, the carrion stench of rotting meat starting to waft up from her bag. Hans' head was heavier than she had expected it to be.

 

 _Nerr..._ Her eyes hurt, and her brain itched- it sounded like someone was dragging a fork over the floor, a loud screech that was digging into her ears. Flora dragged things when they were too heavy to lift but she was too proud to ask for help.

 

_Nerr..._

 

“I'm not here; go away...!” She whispered harshly to whoever was talking to her. A hand brushed against her wrist, and she jumped back, smacking the back of her head against the wall. Elise was gazing up at her, her bloodshot eyes miserable and concerned.

“Nerr? What's wrong, big sister? Why are you over here?”

 

 _Nerr..._ The scraping grew louder. She pressed her hands tighter against the sides of her head, paying no mind to the pain from bending the elongated cartilage of her ears.

 

“The buzzing in my head... it's driving me mad.”

“...there's no buzzing, sis.” Elise frowned, glancing around and standing on her toes to better address her sister. Her voice was a low whisper. “Listen- the stairs lead to an antechamber that's connected to Xander's quarters. I don't wanna bring the Hoshidans in there because they'll ruin everything- they always do- but if it's just you and me, we can talk to him!” Nerr shook her head, retreating further into alcove.

“No. No, talking won't do any good. Only death follows the best intentions.”

“That's not true! What happened with Lilith was an _accident!_ That wasn't your fault, Nerr--”

“Everyone dies when I try to do things....” Scowling, the younger princess grabbed hold of her sister's hand, bracing her feet on either side of the alcove and trying to pull her from it. Nerr wedged herself in tighter in response.

 

“People are going to die if you _don't_ do things! You're the only one Xander always listens to. If you told him to pour soup down his pants, he would! You _have_ to talk to him, Nerr!” As much as she wanted to argue, she did not have the chance. A blinding flash of light went off in front of her eyes, blinding her. For a horrible moment, she thought Lilith had come back to die in her place all over again, but the sharp whiff of sulfur implied that it was a human's teleportation spell.

“Well, well, well... Look who's still alive. You're just full of unpleasant surprises, Nerr...” Blinking away the splotches of light hindering her vision, the sight of the dark sorcerer swam before her, glinting in the light of the torches. His sudden appearance did not go unnoticed- the Hoshidan royals ran over to him, weapons raised. Scowling slightly, another rune inscribed circle appeared around him as he blinked out of their range, reappearing several yards away. Nerr shook her head, prying herself loose from her hiding spot. She was not interested in this game.

 

“Let's go, Elise...”

“Not so fast!” The very sound of his voice made her feel unclean. “Lady Elise, I'm here for you! Why don't you come over here and I'll protect you!” The young girl sneered at him, making a very rude gesture in his direction that she must have learned from Leo.

“ 'Why don't you come over here and I'll use you as a human shield', you mean! Nobody's blind to your evilness- you think I haven't overheard you cackling over all the ways you thought you could hurt Nerr?” It was clear from his expression that he hadn't. “You're dumb as a mule and twice as ugly, Iago; why don't you do us all a favor and go die in a fire?” Nerr had never been so proud of her little sister. She could not help but even smile slightly as she stroked the girl's head.

 

“Save your breath, little one. He's just doing his job. Unfortunately, his job is killing anyone who doesn't look like him. He doesn't care about right or wrong- he's just looking out for himself. A lesson I've taken to heart.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “Now, why don't you take me to Xander's chambers while the Hoshidans deal with him?” She didn't think she could talk to Xander. She just didn't want to continue looking at Iago. The king's advisor applauded slowly.

“Oh, _such_ big words, Hoshidan Princess--”

“Nohrian princess!” She called back to him as she followed Elise up the stairs.

“Wh-- hey! Wait!! Where do you think you're going!?”

“Anywhere this conversation isn't happening.” Even though she couldn't see him, what with her back turned to him and all, she could positively _smell_ the fury radiating off him.

 

“You think your little nonchalant act fools me, Nerr? You think I can't see through you?! I know you're a little goody two-shoes, just like Xander. You're weak, and soft! You can't do anything... _I_ can do whatever is necessary! Like THIS!!” Nerr would've just continued walking had it not been for the high pitched scream that echoed through the massive hall. She turned on her heel, eyes widening as she saw Takumi standing behind Azura, one arm wrapped around her neck, his forearm pressing down on her throat.

“Takumi! What the hell are you doing; _she_ isn't the spy!” The Hoshidan boy didn't answer her. He didn't even seem to notice her, staring ahead with unseeing eyes. His lips were moving continuously, and with the amplification of the room, Nerr could hear exactly what he was muttering.

“diediediediediediediediediediediediediediediedie....” Azura whimpered, ineffectively clawing at her brother's arm.

 

“Takumi...you're... hurting me...!”

“What is wrong with you, Azura? He is not that strong! Maybe _try_ struggling?” Iago laughed loudly, his smarmy voice reverberating and creating a chorus of Iagos.

“Oh, I knew this would be too much for your feeble mind to understand... And I need you to fully comprehend the totality of your defeat; otherwise, I can't fully enjoy myself, you see? In terms your simple brain can understand, Prince Takumi... has been on my side all along! Thanks to him, I've known your whereabouts every step of the way!”

“You're lying!” Hinoka raged, the flames surrounding her lance flaring and scorching the carpet. “Takumi would never--”

“Takumi didn't have a choice in the matter. He's feeble minded, just like the rest of you Hoshidans. It's a proven fact that you byak savages only have an animal intelligence at best. I'm surprised you can even understand human speech!” Nerr, for her part, heaved a long suffering sigh as she viewed she scene playing out below her.

 

“I should have fucking known it... _Why_ does this not surprise me?” Iago scowled up at her, his visible brow scrunched up in confusion.

“What are you talking about? Why isn't this upsetting you? You should be crying and saying, 'You're lying!'...!”

“I know you're telling the truth.” She said honestly. “Not to mention, why would this bother me? After all the things that have happened to me, that surely you know of, _this_ is what you think would break me? I _never_ liked that little shit! Always complaining that there was a traitor amongst us... Given how outspoken he was about this spy, it's only logical that it would be him.” Iago's eye was nearly bulging from it's socket as he fumed.

“Grrr... Stop ruining this for me! You're acting like it doesn't bother you, but I know it does! It _has_ to! You've been stabbed in the back, _again!_ By your own flesh and blood, and after you spent so much time looking for him and worrying about him...! I _beat_ you- admit it!!” The Nohrian princess remained silent for a long time, waiting for his heavy breathing to calm a bit.

 

“...No. Didn't come close, Iago. You can't get stabbed in the back by someone you never trusted enough to turn your back towards. At worst, he stabbed me in the front, and I've been expecting that from day one. Also, I was _never_ looking Takumi. If nobody had told me he was missing, I wouldn't have even noticed.”

“Stop! Ruining! This! For! Me!!!” Nerr didn't even laugh at his mounting frustration, simply raising a brow.

“...why are you so mad? Clearly, Takumi is too stupid to get the idea to betray anyone on his own; I assume he's still possessed.”

“Of _course_ he's still possessed, you miserable _cunt!_ But the spell wouldn't work without a kernel of dissatisfaction in his soul. He's always felt like an after thought in the royal family. He has _quite_ the inferiority complex. He desperately wants to prove himself. That's how he's survived all this time; his hatred kept him going all this time so he could deceive you all! Now it's _his_ turn to shine!” Iago laughed cruelly. Judging by Hinoka and Sakura's distraught expressions, this was all news to them. The sorcerer smirked at her, looking like a cat that was very pleased with itself. “He's deliciously evil, is he not? Better hurry up and kill him... before he kills your precious Azura!” As if to further drive the point home, Takumi tightened his grip on the songstress's neck. Nerr blinked slowly.

 

“...are you done yet? Yawn. Notice how I'm actually _saying_ the word 'yawn'- that's to drive home how bored I am with all this. Takumi. Hey, Takumi- look at me you little shit, I know you hear me...” With slow, herky-jerky movements, the young prince turned his head in her direction. She held up two fingers, rubbing them together. “I'm playing the world's tinniest violin for you.” She deadpanned. Takumi's lips drew back, a low growl emanating from his throat.

“grrrr.... stop... it...” This time, Nerr did smile, the same sardonic grin Iago had been wearing until a moment ago.

“Aw, I'm sorry; did that hurt your poor widdle feewings? Gods, I knew you were pathetic, but this is beyond the pale. It's no wonder nobody likes you, much less _loves_ you; just look at that _STELLAR_ personality of yours, always complaining and insulting... And really, you're going after _Azura?_ She's the only person in this ragtag group of misfits you Hoshidans call 'soldiers' who's _almost_ as weak and pathetic as you! Even _Sakura_ is stronger, but if you tried to sneak up on someone your own size, you'd get your ass kicked.” The boy shuddered violently, shaking his head.

“S-stop... it...!”

 

“Nerrida, what are you doing!? Stop!” Hinoka yelled at her, but the Nohrian princess paid her no mind.

“Ha! Look at him! What's the matter, crybaby? Are you mad? Then why don't you come over here and do something about it, you little bitch...” For a moment, Takumi loosened his grip on Azura's throat. She inhaled deeply. It seemed that she had just been desperate to breathe, but a high, warbling note rang out through the hall... for all of two second, before the prince smashed his fist into her face, effectively silencing her. Nerr cringed as blood began dripping from the singer's nose, while Iago guffawed loudly.

“Oh gods, that almost makes up for _everything!_ I'm _sooo_ glad I'm getting to see this all in person for once. It's quite a show! I wonder how it will end...”

“Well, you're going to have to tell me.” Nerr turned around once more and began continuing up the stairs. Elise grabbed her sleeve, trying to tug her back.

 

“Nerr! You can't just leave!!”

“She's right; you can't!” The whine in the older man's voice was palpable. “Are you _really_ just going to let him kill Azura like this!?” Once more, the princess stopped, slowly turning around and taking her time in walking back to the foot of the stairs.

“...actually, yes. I am perfectly willing to let him kill Azura.”

“What?!”

“Nee-sama!”

“You don't _mean_ that, Nerrida!” She looked over at the Hoshidan princesses, her gaze icy.

 

“Why should _I_ care? No one else seems to. _You're_ his family; why aren't _you_ talking him down from his crazy? Why aren't _you_ trying to save your sister? I know why; because you don't care. He thinks you don't care about him, and you're proving that he's absolutely right. We all know _I_ don't care, but I don't actually _like_ any of you people...”

“N-Nerr...” Azura gasped against the pressure on her throat. “Wha-- what are you... saying...?”

“If you're both weak enough to end up in this position, you deserve it. Go ahead; kill each other. I need to find my brother. But I just want to say one last thing before I leave you to your death match.” She turned her attention to Takumi. His eyes shone unnaturally bright as he stared at her, unblinking, a tic going off in his left eyelid. “Takumi... you're weak and worthless, and everyone is going to talk about you behind your back until the day you finally kill yourself, you overgrown baby. Well, enjoy having Hoshido annexed into Nohr because of your failure!” She turned and began walking away for the final time.

 

“Nnnnngh... n-n-nee-saaaan... I... I'll... kill you...!!!”

“What?!” Iago's shock barely had time to register before Takumi threw Azura to the side and charged after the retreating princess. Nerr had heard him coming, but had been unprepared for how quick he was. He tackled her, knocking her to the ground, her head hitting a step hard enough to put her in a daze. She was so disoriented that she could not fend off the barrage of fists landing on her face. Growling, she brought her elbow up and smashed it into his teeth, knocking him back enough that she could overpower him.

 

_“You are the ocean's gray waves, destined to seek life beyond the shore, just out of reach...”_

“NO!! Shut up!!” Iago pulled a tome from the depths of his feathery cloak, but as he fumbled to flip it open, a blur of white and red charged at him

“YAAH!” Sakura cracked her festal over his skull, snapping the wooden handle in half, but stunning him enough that he dropped his tome. She promptly kicked it away, and Hinoka drove her Amaterasu through it, setting it ablaze. “I-I won't let you interrupt her, you... you.. _bastard!”_ Iago reached up to his hairline, where a thin line of blood was beginning to trickle down his face. His expression morphed into a hideous snarl, and the young princess backed away from him.

 

“Oh, you will _pay_ for that bit of sass, young lady. I hadn't wanted to dirty my hands, but I suppose it can't be helped. You should use that filthy mouth for the only thing Hoshidans are good for...!”

“Eeek!” Sakura tried to run, but the sorcerer had already reached out and grabbed her by a hank of her hair. She struggled against him as runes began glowing in the air around them. He was going to teleport them both to gods knew where... and he would have too, had a glowing arrow not cut through the arm holding his quarry, the gust of wind resulting from it detonating knocking him off balance. Takumi lowered the Fuujin yumi, breathing hard.

 

“Let go of my sister, Nohrian scum...”

“Takumi!” Azura called out, coughing slightly. “You're--”

“I'm myself again.”

“It's about damn time...” Nerr pushed herself to her feet, spitting out a mouthful of blood. She had sunk her teeth into her tongue as he pummeled her. “You couldn't have snapped out of it _before_ you punched me in the face?” The prince glanced back at her.

“Oh, that was all me. I've been wanting to punch you in your smarmy, Nohrian mouth for months.” His face softened into a sincere smile. “But... thank you, nee-san. You know what to say to get through to a person.”

“Pissing little brothers off is my specialty.”

 

“Wh... what just happened...?!” Iago could not contain his lament, tugging at his long, greasy hair as he observed the scene playing out with a gaping jaw.

“I just woke up for good; _that's_ what happened! Those blackouts, waking up in places I didn't remember falling asleep... I thought I was dreaming that voice in my head, but it was _you!_ Well, no more. My brother and sisters need me, and I won't let them down! I am a proud prince of-- of... excuse you, I'm talking here!” Nerr rudely brushed past the prince in the middle of his dramatic speech, making her way towards Iago.

“Nobody cares, Takumi; monologue in your head like the rest of us do.” Iago took several steps backwards.

 

“Wh-what are you doing, you pesky cockroach? Get away from me!!” The Nohrian girl ignored him, her vision turning monochrome as her left arm elongated. Iago paled, his eye widening almost comically as he tried to run, but she reached out, grabbing him in the massive jaws that were once her fingers. He squirmed against her, every movement triggering the maw to tighten around him, driving teeth the size of arms ever closer to his soft insides. “Awk! N-no... no! I don't want to die!!”

“ _Well, I don't want you to LIVE, so it seems we're at an impasse...”_

“Please... listen!! I-I was under a spell the whole time! Th-th-this is all King Garon's fault! He _made_ me act this way! I would _never_ have done all those things to you! I-urk!... _like_ you... I think you're-urp! ... _wonderful..._ ” He was actually gagging- she could smell the bile on his breath. The notion of saying something kind to her was actually making him _physically_ ill. Nerr could not smile, but the thick feelers jutting from her skull wagged faster.

 

“ _Awww, I'm flattered... that you think I'm merciful enough to actually be listening to you.”_ She squeezed her grip around him, and he writhed in agony.

“Y-you spared those Hoshidans!”

 _“Because they could no longer fight. If you'd like that same mercy, then I'll have to ensure you're no longer a threat to me. Cutting off everything below the waist should accomplish that.”_ She squeezed harder, feeling bones break under her grip. Iago threw his head back, howling in agony as he thrashed.

“NOOOOO!!! STOP! Please STOP!!! Won't somebody save me!? King Garon is the evil behind all of this! I've been used! Have mercy on me!!”

“Pathetic...” Nerr blinked at the sound of a voice she hadn't been expecting to hear. Leo nonchalantly made his way towards her, as though Scarlet and Ryouma weren't bound in vines and dragging along behind him. Silas's hands were bound at the wrist, but he was at least allowed to walk upright.

 

“Leo!!” Elise's voice rang with joy at the sight of her brother.

_“Leo! It's been too long. How's tricks, little brother?”_

“Tricks are fine, sister.” He turned his attention to Iago, his gaze icy. “Any last words, Iago?”

“Lord Leo! I see you've apprehended the rest of the Hoshidans! Oh, thank the gods! You're going to save me from these byak savages...”

“...were you even listening to me just now? What part of 'any last words, Iago?' makes you think I'm on _your_ side? I am not your ally, you monster! You have always disgusted me, but your actions in Chevalier have shown that you are clearly beyond redemption. Our glorious kingdom would do well to be rid of the likes of you.” Nerr felt something hot and wet trickle down the inside of her hand and groaned in disgust.

 

“B-but... milord--!”

“I just came for a front row seat to the show.”

_“At least face your death with a modicum of dignity, you coward. A grown man wetting himself... killing you will be a mercy.”_

“No! No, please, I beg y--!!” The princess felt her hair singe as something hot flew past the side of her head. Iago's head snapped back as the hooked point of the holy nageyari pierced his skull, knocking his mask off and revealing the distorted flesh there. Hinoka tugged on it's chain, drawing back her Amaterasu as well as a sizable chunk of skin as the entry wound was ripped wider open. Shaking the gore from her weapon, she glowered at the Nohrian royals.

“You were taking too long.”

 _“...I wanted to do that...”_ Nerr muttered as she dropped the corpse, shaking her hand out as it returned to it's almost normal size and wiping it on her tights for good measure. Leo waited until she was done before nonchalantly waving his hand. The vines that had bound the two Hoshidans uncoiled, snaking back into the cracks of the stone floor.

 

“I believe these belong to you, Nerr.”

“Where's the other one?” Her brother frowned.

“What other one?”

“Never mind.” Oh, well. Shura had held up his end of the bargain. She hoped he wouldn't get caught by the palace guards. Elise bounded over to him, throwing her arms around his neck and nearly knocking him over in the process.

 

“I missed you _soooo_ much, Leo!! Do you have any idea how worried we were when you vanished? Do you!?”

“I apologize, Elise. I... I needed to clear my head... This castle can be maddening at times...” The princess frowned up at him for all of two seconds before her face split into a wide grin.

“I forgive you. Are you gonna join us?” Leo's eyes narrowed as his gaze swept over the Hoshidans.

 

“...have you defected to the Hoshidan's side as well, Elise?” She scowled once more, reaching up and cuffing his ear.

“No one's defecting anywhere, stupid! We're going to confront Xander and Father and try to end the war without any more violence. He might actually listen to you, brother; you've always been the smartest of us all!” The blonde boy glanced over to Nerr.

“...is that your plan as well? To confront Father in an attempt to end this war?”

“The less said about what I want to confront him with, the better...” Leo sighed deeply, removing Elise's arms from his neck and setting her back on the ground.

 

“I am as eager for an end to this tedious bloodshed as anyone... but I am still a prince of Nohr, and King Garon is still my father. If I go with you and he orders me to cut you down, I will be duty bound to obey. I cannot bring myself to do that.” She nodded grimly.

“I understand, Leo. Once upon a time, I felt exactly the same. There may be no common blood between us, but you are now and forever my brother. I would have nothing come between us.”

“Thank you, sister. And I know.” He looked back down at Elise, resting a hand on her head. Love his sibling as he did, Nerr had never seen him actually display affection towards any of them, especially not Elise, who seemed to be a perpetual thorn in his side.

 

“You got this head-strong streak from Nerr, I just know it... Be careful, Elise. This war is driving Father to the brink, and I don't know what he might do in a fit of anger. If anything happened to you... we would die. _I_ would die- that would kill me.” For a long moment, Elise just stared up at him, her violet eyes wide. She wrapped her arms around his waist, pulling him to a bone breaking hug.

“Aw, I know that, silly! But don't worry; I'll be fine.”

“Don't worry, Leo; I'll keep her safe.” The prince's eyes narrowed at Nerr's statement, and he looked her up and down.

“Always so reckless... Xander is stronger than you can possibly fathom, Nerr; stronger than either of us. And Father is perhaps stronger still. You're weak and hurt- I don't even know if you can keep yourself safe... I think you should rethink this, sister.” Nerr's eyes hardened.

 

“And then what will I do? Go back to Hoshido? If I die today, then so be it. Goodbye, Leo. I hope we can meet again, hopefully as a family once more.” She turned away from him, refusing to argue the point once more. The stairs seemed to go on for an eternity. Elise and the Hoshidans were following her, but she paid them no mind. Xander was somewhere at the top of those stairs, and beyond him, King Garon. Ryouma and Elise could speak to Xander. Leo, Camilla, Elise- they had all been happy to see her, at least to an extent. There would be no warm welcome from her brother. There were no words between them- even she knew that. The only way he wished to speak was through swinging swords and hers was in the courtyard beside Lilith's cold body. They could all stay far away from her while she had words with her father one final time.

000

 

The path leading deeper into the castle was deserted. It seemed as though no one lived there anymore. There were no guards, no servants, no signs of life. The only sound that echoed in the long halls was that of footsteps muffled by plush carpet... and the grinding scraping that grew louder and louder. Sakura trotted up to Nerr, who was seemingly leading the group, and tugged on her hand. The Nohrian girl hissed sharply in pain- she had tugged on her right hand, sending pain searing through her arm. At once, the young princess jumped away, as if it had been she who had gotten hurt.

 

“Oh! I-I'm sorry, nee-sama!”

“What is it?” She hissed through clenched teeth, trying to ride out the wave of pain. Sakura wrung her skirt between her finger, looking very uncomfortable.

“Um... um... I-it's _that...!_ ” She pointed behind them, and Nerr rolled her eyes as she turned to see what was of such pressing importance, feeling as though her stomach had bottomed out at the sight. The Hoshidans had decided that there was safety in numbers, those that had originally remained behind coming to join the ranks of their royals. The soldiers had parted, however, to make way for the golden sword literally cleaving a path through them. It remained deeply embedded in the stone, a long gap and trail of torn carpet leading all the way down the hall. The Yato would move forward a few feet, then stop, as if an invisible farmer was ploughing a field. With every inch it cut through the stone, it would grind loudly, a sound that made the hairs on the back of her neck stand on end.

 

 _Nerr..._ She remained where she was as it slowly inched towards her, finally stopping at her feet. She reached out with her left and hand a grabbed it. It came free from the stone just as easily as it would have come from a scabbard. Eying the blade suspiciously, she raised it to her ear. There was nothing. Just as there should have been. Glowering at the thing, she awkwardly sheathed it, nearly dropping it as the voice echoed loudly in her head.

 

_NERR!!_

 

“Nerr!” Elise was tugging on her sleeve, brows furrowed. “Are you okay?”

“...yes.” She pointed to a set of double doors. “I know this place. I came here during the fete...”

“Uh huh. You can get to the throne room through there too, but we're going to see Xander--” Nerr didn't wait for her to finish speaking, heading towards the doors. Her arm was on fire, and it felt as though her head were being split in two just as surely as the floor had. In the back of her mind, she could see the lords and ladies milling about in their finery, a string quartet playing faintly in the next room. _Nerr..._ She looked over her shoulder, blinking in surprise when Gunther wasn't standing behind her, telling her to stop gawking. Where was-- oh that was right. Garon. She would deal with Garon and then... and then the buzzing might stop.

 

 _Nerr..._ She pushed the doors open with her shoulder, not expecting them to be locked, but surprised to find they weren't all the same. He _knew_. He knew she was coming for him- that was why there were no soldiers in her way, why there was no--

 

“Hello, Nerr.” The torches illuminating the massive room cast a warm, flickering light over the dark figure in the center. He turned around slowly, loathing emanating from him in waves. “You have done well to make it this far... but that was just practice.” He held the violet scabbard holding his Siegfried before him in his left hand, and slowly pulled the ebony blade free. The elder magic that engulfed it radiated outwards, consuming the room and snuffing out most of the torches. Nerr shuddered as the cold washed over her. The blade pointed at her was a secondary concern- memories of foul elder magic choking the air before people died rising to the surface of her brain.

“I have no business with you, brother. If you wish to end this war, you will have that opportunity. I will have words with the man I once called 'Father'.” The crown prince scoffed loudly, his voice laced with disgust.

“For all your trials, you are still so naïve. Did you think I'd let anyone, even you, kill my Father, my king, right in front of me? If you insist on toppling Nohr, you'll have to go through me first!” Nerr's lips twisted.

 

“I'm certain you'd gladly stand back and watch him kill _me_.”

“Big brother, please stop!!” Elise ran into the room, pushing Nerr to the side as she stood in front of the older woman, her arms outstretched. “Why are you acting like this? This is _Nerr_ , out _sister!_ All she wants is to come home!” Xander's hatred turned to shock and dismay.

“Elise... What are you doing here? With _her?!_ Is _this_ where you've been in my absence? In the company of that-- that _traitor!?_ Have you turned your back on us as well?!” The young princess flinched at his accusations.

“No! I've been with Cassita, not that _you'd_ care! You don't care about _anything_ anymore; you're just as bad as Father!” Her anger quickly dissolved into misery, and she sobbed quietly. “...I just want the war to end... I want our family to go back to the way it was...!” For a moment, it seemed that Xander's stone faced facade was beginning to crack, but he quickly looked up from his youngest sister, hatred returning. Nerr glanced back, mentally groaning at the sight of Azura and Ryouma. It had been so close... Elise had almost done it, she had to give her sister credit. When their brother next spoke, his voice was as hard as his heart certainly had become.

 

“...I see. Is that child's logic how you swayed Camilla and Leo to turn their backs on their kingdom, their duty- to abandon us in our time of need? I'm afraid it won't work on me. As the crown prince of Nohr, I do not have the luxury to be so naïve, as to let the lies of savages turn me against that which I hold dear. Your reign of terror ends here and now, Nerr- for you and your beloved Hoshidans.”

“Crown Prince Xander!” Ryouma stepped forward, his face severe. “We have not come here to engage you in battle. We seek to discuss an armistice--!!” He was knocked to the floor as a beam of blood red magic shot from the stone in Siegfried's pommel like an arrow, striking the Hoshidan man in the chest.

“Ryouma!!” Azura knelt beside him, lifting him up. The middle of his crimson breastplate was scorched, cracks branching out from the point of impact.

 

“The trail of bodies you left in your wake says otherwise, Hoshidan. Were you thinking of the terms of your armistice as you cut down the mothers and fathers, sons and daughters, who stood in your way? And _you..._ ” He glowered at Nerr as if he had never seen a more hateful creature. “You lead them here. You lead them against the soldiers who had once fought to protect you... You despicable bitch. _I_ will exact the vengeance those who's lives you took cannot.”

“Xander, no!!” Elise cried out desperately.

“Silence, Elise! You've committed enough treason for one day. Show me there's still a shred of honor left in that craven byak heart of yours, Nerr.” Even Azura called out to him in anger.

“This is madness, Prince Xander! We've come here in hopes of reaching peace; you cannot--”

“Hold fast, Azura.” Groaning slightly, Ryouma pushed himself to his feet. “The prince clearly sees this as a matter of honor. As long as no soldiers intervene, neither shall we.” The songstress gaped at him, outraged disbelief writ on her face.

 

“Are you out of you fucking mind, Ryouma? He'll _kill_ her!!” Xander shook his head.

“She's right. I will. So you'll just sit back and watch while I slaughter your beloved little sister? ...these are the people you chose over us, Nerr. Always remember that.” He turned his attention back to the prince. “This isn't a trick; I'm no Hoshidan. You see? I have no soldiers nor retainers. And to ensure it remains fair on both sides...” The prince raised his hand over his head. Nerr could feel the energy seep through the ground, and jumped as the massive doors slammed shut. Gasping, Azura ran towards them, trying to pull them open.

“What did you do, Xander!?”

 

“I don't need to sneak around like vermin to deal with my enemies. I'll kill you all one at a time so you can see your demise coming, starting with the traitor. Come, Nerr. We duel in the great hall; it was your first venture into our castle... only fitting that it will be your last.” Nerr ignored him, walking over to the door and trying her weight against it. It seemed the two panels had been fused together to form an extension of the wall. She had grown so accustomed to simply walking away from Ryouma when she no longer wished to deal with him that she had forgotten that wasn't an option with Xander. She sighed, feeling all her strength leave her. Cool hands grabbed her shoulders, turning her around. Azura was staring at her with fearful eyes.

 

“Nerr, don't do this. You have nothing to prove to him. He will kill you!”

“Do you have any idea how many times he could've killed me by now, Azura? But if he's tired of playing cat and mouse, then so be it. I know I am... Perhaps when this insult to his honor is dealt with, he will be more open to peace talks. Just _don't_ let Ryouma near him. Let Elise do all of the talking.”

“But--!”

“Azura...” She leaned in close to the other girl, close enough that she could see herself in the singer's golden eyes, her voice a whisper loud enough for only them to hear. “If I die, and peace is achieved and Hoshido and Nohr live in harmony... kill King Garon for me. Grind up some glass and put it in his food, or push him off a cliff or something; I don't care. Hire an assassin. Just make him be dead. I'll be able to rest in peace then.” The singer cringed at her words, her lips twisting in displeasure.

“I'll... see what I can do...” Elise was requesting something as well, but hers wasn't going over as well.

 

“Xander, _no!! Please_ , don't do this!! Don't fight, don't hurt my Nerr!!” The crown prince sighed deeply, reaching up to pinch the crooked bridge of his nose.

“Stay back, Elise. There is no need for you to see this.”

“But--!!”

“I told you to stay here!!” He screamed at her. Elise quickly backed away from him, bursting into tears and wailing loudly. The older man turned his back on her, heading deeper into the chamber. Nerr approached the sobbing girl, kneeling down with a bit of difficulty. She never dreamed such simple movements could hurt so much. Reaching up, she brushed away the locks of blonde hair clinging to her wet cheeks.

 

“I'm so sorry, Elise.” She whispered to her sister. “You tried. You should always be proud of that. Look at me, little one.” Violet eyes brimming with tears slowly reached hers, and Nerr smiled with as much sincerity as she could. “ _Always_ try. It might not work out. You might get hurt. You might get others hurt, but if you truly, _truly_ want something, then try your hardest to make it happen. I didn't try hard enough. I gave up, because it was hard, and giving up was easy. Never, _ever_ give up, Elise- when you give up, you fail, and everything you had done up to that point is for _nothing!_ ” Her voice broke as tears choked her. Tears poured from Elise's eyes as she wept silently. Nerr took a deep, shaky breath to try and collect herself, drawing the smaller girl into a one armed hug.

“It's okay, Elise. Everything is going to be fine. I'm so glad you came all the way here with me. It was wonderful to spend my last moments with you.” She pulled away just enough to look her sister in the eye. “No matter what happens, little one, having you as my sister has been the best thing that ever happened to me.” She leaned forward, pressing a kiss to the girl's forehead before getting back to her feet. It was harder than she had thought it could be. She had already taken several steps behind Xander before the younger princess seemed to break from her misery induced haze.

 

“W-wait... 'Last moments'? 'No matter what happens'!? What are you talking about!? Nerr, NO!!!!”

“Goodbye, little one.” She did not turn back, did not spare a single glance behind her as she followed Xander into the adjacent room, though she could not deny the pain in her heart as the door clicked shut behind her, locking from the inside. The crown prince stood several paces from her, going through several stances. Any other time, she would have assumed he was warming up, or perhaps trying to intimidate her, but she knew the drill he was running perhaps better than he himself did. Swing, parry, thrust. Parry, riposte, block.

“Alright, Nerr. Time to settle this once and for all. I hope you've taken all my training to heart; I sincerely doubt the Hoshidans have felt it worth their time to further hone your skills. Don't hesitate like you always used to, do you under-- Are you paying attention to me?”

 

“What are you so upset, Xander?”

“What? What nonsense are you spouting now?”

“...parry, riposte, block. Pass back, pivot, long-point... Or did you think a few months would be enough to erase such things from my mind. That was the drill you ran when you came to visit me when I was little... when you were angry. So tell me, brother; what do _you_ have to be angry about? What loved ones have _you_ lost, how many people have died in _your_ place?” The older man's jaw worked as though he was chewing the words he wished to speak. Breathing out sharply through his nose, he adjusted his grip on his blade.

“I owe you no explanations. Draw your sword; this is no mock battle, little sister.” Nerr laughed humorlessly.

“Oh, so I'm your little sister again, now am I? Suddenly you care? Where was that fraternal concern when I told you how your father tried to have me _killed?_ If you're so worried about hurting me, allow me an audience with King Garon- I promise, there won't be any blood on _your_ hands.”

“That is _enough!_ No more words, Nerr; draw your gods damned sword!” She met his furious gaze coldly.

 

“...I _can't_. My arm is injured; it's going to have to be amputated.” Xander growled, baring his teeth as he stalked towards her. Her first instinct was to step back, but she would not appear frightened before him. She waited to feel the cold steel cut through her flesh, but the blow never came. Her brother had sheathed his blade and was reaching for hers. Nerr could not speak, taken aback by his unpredictable course of action.

“I will have no excuses from you, Nerr...” He pulled the golden sword free, nearly dropping it as it dragged his hand to the ground. A long time ago, Jakob had said something about it being strangely heavy, but the princess had no time to think of the balance of blade.

“I'm not making excuses Xander-- let me go; you're hurting me!” The blonde prince grabbed her right arm, wrenching it forth, the agony of the sudden movement tearing through her. She tried to pull away from his grip, but Xander ignored her struggles, placing the ribbed hilt in her hand and closing her fingers around it.

 

She opened her mouth to yell at him, right in his stupid little ear, that she could not hold the blade much less swing it despite what he may have wanted, but the only thing that escaped her lips was a shriek of misery. Skin peeled off in strips and hardened into the plate-like scales she was used to, weaving themselves down her arm, her hand, covering even the Yato's hilt. Transforming, even partially, always hurt, but this was beyond the pale. Xander released her and without his support, she dropped to the floor, breathing hard and trying to keep from gagging. It didn't feel like she was holding a sword- it felt as though her hand had been cut off and the pronged pommel had been shoved inside the stump that was left, scraping at her nerves and leaving her in agony.

 

“Oh gods... get it off of me...!” The rest of her arm felt as though it had fallen asleep, buzzing terribly but not exactly hurting. The damaged muscles and nerves were numb, allowing her to shake the limb frantically, but the sword would not come loose. If anything, the bands of scales seemed to tighten over it, just like her fingers had done when the Ganglari had tried to pull her into the Infinite Chasm. “Ugh.... gods, it's terrible... I can feel it _inside me..._!” Nerr was so overcome by the alien sensation that she hadn't noticed Xander drawing his sword until she found Siegfried's tip inches from her eyes.

“You can wield your blade once more, it seems. Now get up...” Groaning, the princess doubled over until her head rested on the floor. Wield her sword, indeed. She had no strength to move.

“Just kill me now, you bastard, and be done with it.” Xander's harsh eyes narrowed and he he reached down, grabbing her by her relatively normal arm and heaving her to her feet.

“I will fight you with honor. As the crown prince of Nohr--”

 

“You don't _have_ any honor, you son of a bitch! You serve a despot who orders the slaughter of his own people. You stand idly by while your family falls apart. This isn't _my_ fault, Xander; you can't blame everything going to hell on me not being here- I was _never_ here! I have never _been_ here! This is _your_ fault, because you're a weak, spineless coward, just like Hans and Iago-- no. No, you're _worse_ than them, because at least _they_ knew they were monsters. They reveled in it. You're just a pathetic, two-faced-- oof!!” Nerr reeled back as something blunt smashed against her face. Blood gushed from her nose as the cartilage snapped. Xander was lowering his buckler, holy blade raised instead.

“If you have anything to say to me, traitor, say it with your sword. Haah!!” He swung, and it was only through instinct that the princess brought her own blade up to block him. She knew her brother's moves- she had sparred against him for years... but that had been different. He had moved slower, his blows restrained- likewise, she had been faster, healthier, more eager. Now, the crown prince was demonstrating why he was considered one of Nohr's strongest knights. His movements were so quick and fluid as he slashed at her that Nerr could barely follow his strokes with her eyes, instead relying solely on the instinct honed by years of training. Gunther had taught her to give no ground, but she had to put _some_ space between herself and his wild swings. His eyes were just as crazed.

 

“You would call _me_ a coward, after you turned your back on us just because it was easier? Slaughtering the men and women who once protected you, then claiming you acted for _peace_ to comfort yourself?”

“I didn't raise my sword until someone attacked me first! Even then, I wasn't trying to kill anyone!” Xander blocked her riposte, knocking her back with his buckler.

“If you had come home, they wouldn't have _needed_ to attack you!” He swung again, his sword denting her breastplate and cutting into her stomach as it raked down her. The toughened skin there might have been enough to stop a normal steel sword, but the elder magic imbued in Siegfried penetrated her skin, gouging a deep slash in her midsection. Nerr cried out in pain, but her anger kept her grounded.

 

“I _couldn't_ come home because your father would have _murdered me!!_ ” She screamed, driving the Yato into his side. The ebony plates of maile he wore guarded against the majority of the sword's edge, but it still managed to shear away quite a bit of metal, allowing the point to penetrate his flesh. Grunting in pain, Xander pulled back, his hand going to the wound just above his hip. The smell of his blood was muted by her own, but it was still there. He looked from his hand back to her.

“...you're much stronger than before. I'm impressed. But I'm afraid that's still not enough.” He was on her before she could blink, and she lifted her sword to parry his blow without thinking. That was a mistake. Nerr could feel the parallel blades slide into her flesh below her left arm, where the cuirass she wore did not reach, sliding in and scraping against her ribs as it severed the muscles there. The door slammed open, but she could not hear it. She could not focus on anything but the pain searing her. The princess stumbled back, hitting the wall behind her, the impact setting her nerves ablaze as she fought to remain in control of her breathing. Panicking would only make her bleed faster- Xander had taught her that. Xander had taught her how to deal a swift, killing blow, ensuring to twist the blade to sever anything it came in contact with. That she was not on her deathbed already was proof that he was toying with her... punishing her. Azura's voice sounded far away as she screamed.

 

“Gods, she's getting killed! Ryouma, _do something!!_ ”

“Nerrida! Get back on your feet! You are stronger than this Nohrian!” Despite her best efforts to remain calm, Nerr felt her heart begin hammering at the mere sound of Ryouma's voice, encouraging her to demonstrate Hoshido's might.

“LEAVE US!! You didn't helped the first time, don't act like you're going to start now. This is between me... and my... my brother...” She pushed herself from the wall and managed to take two steps forward before collapsing. Her vision was faded in and out, as though she could not keep her eyes open. She could barely squirm as a strong hand lifted her by the tattered remains of her cloak. Xander's eyes were flecks of steel. It was hard to imagine there had ever been a time when he'd looked at her with warmth and affection.

“What's wrong, Nerr? Is this really all you've got?” The brother she remembered would have smiled as he said those words, teasing but encouraging all the same. He may have hurt her during their sparring sessions, but never simply for the sake of hurting her.

 

“Xander... please...I don't want to fight... I just wanted to come home...” Nerr could hardly understand what she was saying; her head was pounded and she felt like she was going to be sick at any moment. If he wasn't so angry, Xander probably would've noticed that and given her a wide berth- when she vomited, it usually ended up all over his shoes. “You... you have so much power... why are you using it against me? I love you- all I ever wanted was to love you! I'm not the one destroying your family or threatening Nohr; that man you're protecting is! Don't you see that?! You're just as much a pawn as I was! Where is the justice in that...?” The crown prince inhaled deeply, letting out a long, slow sigh as he looked away from her.

 

“Justice is an illusion. The righteous suffer and the wicked are rewarded because life is not fair. When kingdoms and lives are at stake, justice does not matter.... don't you see that by now?!” With every word he spoke, he seemed to grow more and more enraged. “If there were justice in this world, we wouldn't be wasting away in Hell while the Hoshidans laze about in paradise! If there were justice, you would have returned to us when given the choice! You would've loved us as we loved you!!!” This time when he drove his sword into her gut, he did twist it before wrenching it back out and letting her fall back to the floor. She could barely hear him as he lifted Siegfried above his head.

 

“May your belief in justice comfort you in death. My justice is defending my homeland!” The edges of the blade seemed to flash like lightning as he brought it down on her, to sever her head or drive through her heart, she did not care. She had just begun to close her eyes when a blur of cream streaked past her, intercepting Xander's blow and hitting the ground hard. Nerr's first hazy, pain fueled thought was that it had been an exceptionally large cloak thrown at the prince to distract him, until her brother's desperate shriek of “ELISE!!!!” cut through the air. He threw Siegfried to the ground and knelt. Nerr could not see what he was kneeling beside- she could not move without her intestines threatening to squeeze through the hole in her belly- but as he lifted it up, she felt her blood run cold. Elise lay in his arms, her face pale and drawn in agony, tears squeezing through her tightly screwed eyes.

 

“Elise! Please, speak to me! _Elise!!!”_ The young girl groaned loudly, whimpering with every slight movement. Every breath seemed to be agony for her, yet when she opened her eyes, her voice was strong.

“Xander... your sword... lay it down... for me... Nohr... needs more from you... _we_ need more... from you... not just strength...” She groaned loudly, thrashing in her pain and only making whatever injury she had endured worse. Xander tightened his grip on her, trying to calm her with one hand while he pressed the other somewhere on her ribs. The plain brown kirtle she had worn was bright red.

“Don't speak, Elise! Save your strength!”

“N-no... I have to... try...” Her breathing was growing more labored by the second. “We need caring... and warmth... and-- and tears... We need... peace... Try to be at... at pea...” She had begun lifting her hand, but the tiny limb had fallen back down, knuckles hitting the blood splattered stone and remaining there. Xander gasped sharply.

“...Elise? Elise! Answer me! ELSIE!!!!” He shook her small body, but the princess's head simply lolled to and fro limply before falling against her shoulder. With a shuddering whimper, the crown prince slowly, ever so gently, lowered his sister's body back to the floor, laying her hands across her chest. Nerr groaned, biting her lip clean through as she fought the pain in her gut to roll over to her hands and knees. Her sweater was so over-saturated with blood, she could feel it dripping from the cloth. Her hands and feet were numb, but she ignored that. She ignored everything as she dragged herself over to where Elise lay, those few short feet the greatest distance she had ever traveled.

 

“Elise... Elise, wake up...” She slurred, pawing at the girl's shoulder in an attempt to rouse her. “You're not dead... I know you're not dead, Elise, you're just-- you're just playing... you're playing a trick on me... wake up. Wake up! _WAKE UP!!! WAKE UP, ELISE, WAKE UP!!!!_ ” She shook the girl's body violently, ignoring the way her own wounds widened. She had just left Elise, despondent but decidedly alive, what- had it been a few hours ago? Minutes? One did not go from alive to dead in mere seconds, especially not Elise, especially not like this, especially not because of her. It was just a dream. She must have been sleeping, like Elise was. If she went to sleep in her dream, that would probably wake her up. Nerr curled up beside her sister, resting her head on the other girl's shoulder, just like they used to sleep when they took naps together in the citadel. She'd go to sleep and Flora would wake her up and she'd have to train with Gunther and then she could ride with Lilith for a while. Everything would go back to normal when she woke up.

 

_Nerr..._

 

“Nerr! Nerr, wake up!!” Someone was slapping her, and as she cracked her eyes open, she could see a gentle shade of blue above her. Well, there was Flora. “Wake up, Nerr! Don't fall asleep, dammit. Wake up!” The slap came harder this time, and the bright stinging cleared some of the cobwebs from her head. There was no smiling maid standing over her. Only Azura.

“Azu... wha...?”

“You have to stay awake, Nerr!” Vaguely, she could hear something hitting against something in the distance, maybe feet marching in formation, _little soldier, be strong, be brave..._ Another slap left her ears ringing. “Wake UP! Someone is coming. Ryouma, help me!!” There was a loud crash, the sound of wood cracking, of doors hitting doors. Amidst the cacophony of voices, she could barely hear the faint clanking of plate approaching her. Nerr blinked hard, trying to fend of the sleep that threatened to draw her back. Azura was telling her not to go to sleep... Azura was yelling at Xander.

“Get back, you murderer! You're no better than your father! Your sister threw herself on your sword to stop you and Nerr from killing each other, and you _still_ intend to fight!?”

 

“...no.” The prince's voice was barely even a whisper, the stench of salt and misery wafting from him. “Leave this place. I care not where you go, but do not stay here. ...just go.” Slowly, Xander turned away from them, not bothering to even look at the Hoshidan soldiers who had poured into the room.

“Ryouma-sama, are you alright?”

“The door locked!”

“We couldn't get--”

“What did the anyan do to you?”

“Is Azura alright?” Even though the Hoshidans had apparently broken the door keeping them at bay, the banging continued. A loud slam echoed through the chamber, followed by the sound of sabaton clad feet and boots marching in.

 

“Prince Xander! Is everything okay?” A screechy, high pitched voice called out to the prince.

“Is-- is that Lady Elise? What happened to her!?” A much deeper male voice seemed to spark a firestorm of fear and anger.

“The princess, she's dead!”

“The Hoshidans killed Lady Elise!”

“Filthy savages!”

“Your bastard prince tried to blitz Ryouma-sama!”

“It's a trick! We're being ambushed!” As the Hoshidans joined in the fervor, swords and lances were drawn and raised.

 

“Stand down... I said stand down!” It seemed to take all of Xander's strength to raise his voice enough for it to be heard over the rabble. “We will not engage the Hoshidans. Not here, not now... They will leave--”

“They killed our princess!”

“They slaughtered our brothers and sisters!”

“You don't mean to deny us justice, Prince Xander?”

“That is an order!”

 

“Shut up, princeling!” One of the soldiers from the depths of the crowd shouted. “King Garon's orders trump yours, and he ordered that we take no prisoners. Kill the Hoshidans!”

“YEAH!!!” The rest of the Nohrians cheered in approval, and one of them, in silvery armor, charged into the crowd of Hoshidans, lance lowered as she ran. Like the first drops of rain that quickly became a downpour, the soldiers fell onto each other, driving their blades into whatever exposed flesh they could find. Azura cried out in fear as the fighting broke out, feet and blades both coming dangerously close to her head. If she had any sense, she would have crawled away, but she cast self preservation to the wind, draping her body over Nerr's. Had she been in any position for coherent thought, the Nohrian princess would've joked about the flimsiest human shield, but the cold spreading up from her hands and feet was becoming too much of a distraction.

 

“Azura-sama!”

“Orochi's! Help me!” Something jostled her, and as she blinked, violet flashed above her.

“Gods above, what happened?!”

“Xander stabbed her. Please, help her!”

“Don't worry, Nerrida-sama; Orochi will fix you.” She could just feel the burning itch of her lacerated organs beginning to knit themselves shut, when it stopped suddenly, marked by a high scream. Another body fell beside them, a Hoshidan archer. The man gurgled as blood flowed freely from the gash in his throat. A Nohrian with a broad ax stood before them, fresh blood dripping from their armor. They lifted the ax, it would tear through whoever it hit like wet paper. Nerr just hoped it would be quick, she didn't want to--

 

“NO!!” The screech of metal shearing was unbearable. Something hard and heavy, with sharp edges, fell on her legs, not severing the flesh or breaking the bone, but simply bruising and crushing.

“Oh gods, Prince Xander! I-- Guuuhh!!” The ax wielding soldier spoke no more as the metal of their helmet deformed, crushing their skull. Xander? Groaning weakly, Nerr tried to raise herself to a seated position, only to be forced back down.

“Lay down- Nerrida-sama. You'll die faster if you move.”

“Nnnn... n-no... don't... not me... h-heal Xan...der...” She tried to reach out to the body covering her legs as her insides were seared with healing magic, but she couldn't move, she couldn't even keep her eyes open.

000

 

Nerr awoke with a jolt, as if she had been dozing and just remembered that she was supposed to meet Xander for their sparring lessons--

 

“XANDER!!” Forcing herself upright with great difficulty, she called out for her brother, remembering blurry bits and pieces of seeing someone fall. Elise, seeing Elise fall, feeling herself fall... The Nohrian princess looked around, only at that moment realizing that the clash of weapons had fallen silent. Bodies littered the floor where lords and ladies had once gathered to dance, Nohrian armor scorched and punctured, Hoshidan robes torn to shreds. Blood coagulated on the floor.

 

Groaning, Nerr pushed herself to her hands and knees, nearly falling face first into the gore as she realized her right hand no longer laid flat on the ground, the Yato still bound to her deformed limb. Tearing her eyes away from it in disgust, the princess managed to stand, stumbling as she scanned the bodies looking for someone familiar. A cavalier with fluffy lazuline hair lay with her limbs sprawled at awkward angles, her armor basted in drying blood. It was doubtful it was hers- the arrow lodged in her right eye had probably been what killed her. The pink robes of one of the fallen Hoshidan samurai caught her gaze, the reddish brown splotch that had bloomed over the back hideous against the light rose color. Breathing hard, Nerr paused. Her head was spinning. Where were the others, where was Azura and the rest? She didn't see them, though she hadn't inventoried the entire room yet. Perhaps they thought she had died and left her amongst the rest of the dead. A guttural groan from the far corner of the room caught her attention. A sign of life. Picking her way across the sea of corpses, the Nohrian girl followed the sound. She gasped, recoiling from the sight of Xander sprawled out on the floor. He half leaned against the wall, his hand weakly clutching at his side where intestines sticky with blood hung over his black armor.

 

“Xander!!” Violet eyes fluttered open as she knelt beside him. His circlet had fallen off, the blonde curls it usually held back falling into his ashen face.

“Nerr...?”

“Oh gods... hold on, brother. Just-- just hold on. I-- I'll get you help--”

“No...” He whispered. It sounded like he could not speak any louder. “The Hoshidans... will not help me... Just as I would not help... them. I... I deserve this. My hands... are stained with the blood of innocents...”

“Who cares!? I can help you Xander. Let me just-- I have to take off your armor, then I can--” A leather covered finger pressed to her lips, the pointed tip of his gauntlet nicking her skin.

 

“Shhh... There is nothing you...can do...” Tears welled up in Nerr's eyes, burning her eyes and choking her.

“...I know!” She wailed. “Gods, why? Why did you-- why do you even bother protecting me?! This is just like when we sparred! It's just like when you let me best you so Father would let me leave the citadel....!!” In contrast to her hysteria, the crown prince seemed remarkably calm. Of course, Nerr knew full well it was just the blood loss making him too tired to react strongly. Though that had little to do with the way he smiled up at her, just as he used to.

“You are... my sister... It is my duty to... protect you...”

“But you're _not!!_ Can't you see that!? You _think_ you're helping, but all you're doing is making everything so much worse! What am I supposed to do now!? Gunther is dead, Flora is dead, Lilith is dead, Elise is dead, you're--” She broke off, unable to contain her sobs any longer. “It doesn't matter if the war has already ended- I can't _ever_ come back home anymore. There is no _home_ to come back to; everything is _ruined!!_ ” Nerr buried her face in Xander's neck, knowing that she was supposed to be comforting him, but feeling too small and worthless to even try. Why? Why did everything have to go so horribly wrong? If Xander had killed her, that would have been alright. If _Hans_ had killed her, that would have been alright. What did she offer the world? Not warmth like Lilith. Not joy like Elise. Not strength like Xander. A heavy, shaking hand came up, clumsily stroking her hair.

 

“Dry those eyes, little princess... Let me see you smile... like you do in my memories... I have so many memories of... of our family, joyous... wonderful memories... the happiest days of my life...”

“Then why did you throw it away!?” She pulled back to glare at him, though there was no room for anger in the abyss of her sorrow. “Does your loyalty to your king _truly_ mean more to you than your family?! If you'd just listened to me or Elise--”

“--I would have had... to watch my father cut you down... We may always have a choice, sister... but that does not guarantee the outcome will ever be different. Choose to steal or choose to starve; you can die either way... Things do not happen simply because... we wish they would...” His voice petered out, and Nerr's breath caught as she she shook him.

 

“Xander! Oh gods, don't leave me, Xander!!”

“...I'm here, sister...” He muttered, his eyes closed as his breathing grew shallow. ”I letchu slip away from me... liddle princess... 'm sorry...”

“Don't--”

“I love you, Nerr... I have... always... loved you... trust my words... not my act...tions....” Xander's head fell against his chest. She waited in silence for him to continue speaking, but no sound came, not even the hoarse rasp of his breath.

“Xander... Xander...? W-wake up! Wake up, brother! Don't fall asleep, wake up! _Wake up!!!”_ She shook him, even slapping him as Azura had slapped her, trying to rouse him. He remained still and silent. “XANDER!! _WAKE UP!!!_ ” There was a commotion coming from the adjoining room, but Nerr paid it no mind, continuing to shake her brother desperately.

 

“Nerr! You're awake!” The Nohrian princess glanced over her shoulder, unable to see anything but a blue and white blur approaching her through her tears. Azura knelt beside her, drawing her into an embrace. “Thank the gods. We were too afraid to move you; Orochi said that might make you worse.”

“To hell with me!” She shrugged off the singer's arms, draping herself over Xander's still form. “She should have healed Xander. Who cares if I die? Xander was the only one who could have worked to bring this war to a peaceful end. Not me- I can't do anything. I have no power. I have _nothing!”_ She tightened her arms around her brother, sobbing in earnest. A small, light hand rested on her arm.

 

“...I didn't know Xander as well as you did. I had seen him a few times, when we were children, but we never spoke. I don't think he ever even looked at me. I'm certain it's not his fault; none of my step-siblings were allowed to talk to me unless it was to harass me... ...in all honesty, I don't think he cared very much for me. I was just one of many to him. But you, Nerr... he cherished you. Even though I would be hard pressed to believe it watching him trying to kill you, it seemed clear to me that you were the only thing in this war he seemed to care about. He had Ryouma, the heir to Hoshido's throne, alone and unprepared. He could have won this war without batting an eye- I have no doubt he could have bested Ryouma... but he didn't. He paid no mind to the horde of Hoshidan soldiers, nor the fact that he could have had the entire royal family in the palm of his hand.”

“What's your point, Azura...?!” She wailed, her voice muffled by the sweat soaked ascot she was pressed against.

 

“...he would not have wanted you to lay down and die here. If he had, he wouldn't have given his life so that you could live. He would not have tried to order his soldiers not to fight. I cannot understand the pain you feel, Nerr. I cannot comprehend losing _everything_... but I think I know you well enough to know you do not want to stay here. Your sister wanted peace. Your brother wanted you to live. You want to honor their wishes.” Little by little, Nerr's breathing calmed as her tears slowed.

“...if I stayed here crying... Xander would have g-gently scolded me... but... I would have ignored him. And he would've tried to comfort me anyway, because th-that's what big brothers are supposed to do... He wouldn't w-walk away and leave me with the dead- he would've s-stayed because even though he couldn't help, he _cared_...! Elise would've tried to cheer me up, but she would've just started crying with me too, and then Gunther would come along and I'd stop because he _always_ made everything better. Everybody could do something but me. I'm nothing. I'm worthless.”

 

“As long as you carry their memories inside you, Nerr, you're not worthless. ...everyone matters to someone. Didn't you say something like that? Please don't give up, Nerr. You matter.” She closed her eyes, slowly breathing in and out. The stench of rot was beginning to permeate the air. Don't give up, Try and try and try again, no matter how much you fail. Gunther used to tell her that when she was little, when she had first started learning how to hold a sword and had cried that it was too hard. _'You have not truly failed until you give up, my lady...'_ Garon had probably expected her to give up by now. He had probably expected to lay down and die the moment she had realized she meant nothing to him. He never expected her to continue drawing breath. But she did... just so he wouldn't have the satisfaction of knowing he'd bested her. Vengeance seemed a hollow victory now. But within the ugly, fragmented husk of her soul, she could still feel a kernel of spite rooted inside her. She clung to that feeling, that audacious anger, and it gave her the strength to pull herself away from the corpse she held. Leaning forward slightly, Nerr pressed a soft kiss to Xander's brow, furrowed even as he grew colder, as though he could not find respite even in death.

 

“I love you too, brother. Please apologize to Elise... from both of us.” Sighing, she pushed herself to her feet, nearly toppling over. Her legs felt too weak to even hold her own weight, but Azura reached out, steadying her. The songstress stood as well, her golden eyes dark.

“King Garon is waiting for us. That's why there are no soldiers apprehending us. They're there, us ahead... waiting...”

“Good. I am waiting too. I will lead King Garon to the death he deserves.” Her muscles tensed, and the sword bound to her arm twitched. Xander's blood had begun to flake off. It would soon have a fresh coat.

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A/N- Bruh, when you're writing something and it just takes forever and you're half asleep and fall asleep in the middle of writing and then wake up and have no idea what the fuck you were say... that's this chapter in a nutshell. I cut SOOOO much of the in game dialogue because it just wouldn't work. There's no way Xander would have been able to monologue like that with a lethal blow. Elise is lucky I left her speech in. So, if you're wondering why Elise died so quickly but Nerr managed to survive two very severe injuries, that's because a lot of factors come into play to decided your chances of survival. As a soldier, Nerr is almost in peak physical condition. As a healer, Elise is essentially a wet paper sack. Nerr knows the physiology of injuries- note how she never pulls arrows out unless there's a healer nearby. She also understands the psychology of battle- she has been injured many, _many_ times before, and has built up enough of a tolerance to the pain that is doesn't send her into a state of shock. She keeps herself calm because panic raises blood pressure which, when you're bleeding heavily, can spell insta-death. When you hear stories of people loosing a limb and dragging themselves to aid, it's because they keep calm, which keeps their pulse slow which keeps their blood inside them where it should be. Also, for Elise to die as quickly as she does in the game but with absolutely NO blood anywhere in sight, it seems pretty obvious that she suffered an internal hemorrhage, probably of the arteria pancreatica magna (the pancreatic artery). Again, some people might even survive such trauma for a while yet, but Elise being young, physically weak and psychologically unprepared for the pain of such an injury, would probably quickly go into shock and die.

 

“ _At what price will it all end...?”_


	24. A Tale of Black and Red

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Ch. 24- “A Tale of Black and Red”

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A/N- _“With the fragments of love I'll now discard, I'll forge a sword of vengeance with the broken shards and destroy all those who have destroyed me...”_

000000000000

 

Nerr paid no mind to the Hoshidans as she headed towards the throne room. In her mind, she could hear music, could practically see the figures spinning in pairs, gold and silver and jeweled adornments glittering like stars. Something crawled over her foot and she shuddered at the unexpected sensation. A rat was scurrying towards the shadows, dragging it's disease-ridden belly over her. So there were rats in the castle, too. She had thought that was just a citadel problem. The doors before her burst open, the synchronized beat of marching steps providing a harmony to strings in her mind.

 

“There she is! There's the traitor!” Even though it was only natural for vermin to be in the castle, the thought of Elise and Xander having to fight with rodents and roaches during their meals was a depressing one.

“More soldiers!”

“They never fucking end!” She used to catch rats in the citadel, especially in the winter. Gunther used them to teach her how to clean and skin animals.

“ATTACK!!” Dozens of feet pounded on the thick carpet. Knife goes in, guts come out. Knife goes in, guts come out.

 

“Knife goes in...” She thrust the Yato deep into the belly of the first soldier that reached her, just below his navel, the tip of the blade cutting through layers of muscle and organs and poking through the other side. The man whimpered loudly in pain, dropping his blade as the golden sword slowly cleaved up, only stopping when it reached the tip of his sternum. Lacerated bowels slipped out, filling the air with the stench of sewage as the soldier collapsed into his innards. “...guts come out.” The rest of the soldiers paused for a moment, perhaps not expecting to have one of their own die so quickly. Their shock quickly faded as they charged at her with renewed fury. Nerr frowned at them, unmoving, unspeaking. ' _...I'm your princess... you're not supposed to attack ME...'_ One unlucky paladin was knocked to the side as the Yato connected with his skull, shattering it and sinking into the folds of his brain. Another berserker cried out in fear as a massive black jaw closed around her head, the thick teeth severing her neck with ease.

 

She stepped over their corpses, leaving those that avoided her to the Hoshidans. The throne room seemed to sparkle, the light of the many torches gleaming on the thick roots that branched over the walls. Garon sat on his throne, holding his massive ax in one hand while the other lazily tapped on the stone armrest. He slowly stood, his ermine cloak falling from his shoulders and pooling onto the seat. Raising the ax, the king slammed it down, the pointed counterweight sinking deep into the stone, sparks shooting out. They seemed to come together, forming a bright white flame that surged down the mountain of stairs and across the room itself, coming to stop a few feet before Nerr. As the flames extinguished, she could see that the long red carpet that marked a path to the throne had been seared away. The stone itself had liquefied, red-hot glowing globules of rocks quickly re-hardening along the trail the flames had taken.

 

“My beloved third in line for the throne... I'm so happy you made it home.” By the time the Hoshidan royals had reached the throne room, sprinkled with fresh blood, Garon had made it more than halfway down the stairs. The king ignored them, his narrowed crimson eyes never leaving Nerr's. “It has been so long since I've seen your face. I thought you would have died ten times over by now. Yet here you are. For someone who's spent her whole life as a pampered shut-in, you've achieved something approaching competence. ...I've never been so proud.”

 

“Yes.” The princess nodded and approached him as well, shaking off Azura and Takumi's attempts to keep her away. “I took your lessons to heart. The hate and cruelty you preached... I finally learned. I have something for you, Father.” She reached into her bag, pulling out the stinking mass of flesh that had once been Hans' head, her fingers digging into the macerated meat of his neck. It was barely recognizable as such, with a great deal of the flesh scraped off. One could even see the gouges left by teeth on the reddish brown skull. She tossed it towards the king, and it landed with a dull thump at his feet. Garon looked down at the macabre offering, his face as impassive as his daughter's voice. “My way of saying 'thank you' for destroying everything I ever cared about.” The older man looked up at her, a cruel smirk tugging at his lips.

 

“Me? Oh no, child- you did that yourself.” Hatred and anger swirled inside her.

“You killed my mother. She's dead by your hands, as is Gunther, as is Flora--”

“The next thing you know, you'll be blaming me for the rain. People die, and you just want someone to pin it on. You would even blame me for my children's deaths, though it's clear the fault for that lies with none but you.” Her stomach clenched painfully at those words. Seeing the knife he was twisting was having some effect, the king continued, louder, his voice echoing through the room. “If you had just stayed in Hoshido- hells, if you had just _died_ like you were supposed to, they would still be alive! It wasn't enough for you to tear your brother's heart out in a metaphorical sense; you had to all but do it literally as well. I'm certain your savage byak family is proud of you... you filthy brother killer.”

 

“I--”

“Don't let his words get to you, Nerrida!” Ryouma rushed up beside her, his hand on the hilt of the Raijinto as he glared up at King Garon. The ashen man smiled wider, his teeth bared like a dog's.

“Yes, that's right, let the savages who laid waste to the lands you were raised in do the thinking for you instead. Die for their country, their honor... idiot girl, you can't even inherit their throne.” That barb was so unexpected, so non-sequitur, that it threw Nerr off her guard more than any cruel insult he could have thrown at her. The throne?

“...what are you--”

“Don't listen to him!” The high prince cut her off, raising his voice even louder. Garon laughed coldly.

 

“Oh, did they not tell you? Women are worth nothing in Hoshido. The younger prince has more of a claim to the throne than _you_ do. You'd have to wait for at least three people to die before you get your chance to rule, to say nothing of their children...” The laughter stopped, and the king's eyes were dark as he looked back to her. “Should anything have happened to Xander and Camilla before you revealed yourself to be the traitor that you are, _you_ would have been queen of Nohr! You may have been my pawn- just as every other soldier in my command is!- but I raised you as a princess for _a reason!_ ” There was sincerity to the anger in his voice. How could she have been his heir if he'd intended for her to die in Hoshido? Azura's words from months ago came back to her, that he could have just as easily kept her locked in the dungeons all her life. Nerr said nothing, quietly digesting these facts. Her silence seemed to unnerve Ryouma. Her blood brother grabbed her shoulders, trying to shake a reaction out of her.

 

“He's lying! Nerrida you know--”

“No, it is _you_ who lies, High Prince, and she knows it. You never told her how little value she has, did you?”

“That-- that doesn't matter to her!” Hinoka cried out, the hint of a quaver in her voice indicating that she was trying to convince herself of those words as much as she was Garon.

“Oh, but it does.” The king whispered harshly. “How little you know of your sister. She may have filthy, Hoshidan blood flowing through her, but she is a Nohrian through and through. She craves power as much as I do- does _that_ look like the face of peace and mercy to you? Like father, like daughter...” The king threw his head back and laughed, every sharp bark mocking the Hoshidans.

 

“...I'm not fighting for a throne...” Nerr whispered, just loud enough for the king to hear. She stared at her feet. They were almost black with blood and filth. Slowly, the laughter stopped.

“What?”

“I don't care about a throne, much less the Hoshidan throne. I don't care if Hoshido is burned to the ground. Everything you destroyed... all the lives you took. All the lives you ruined, and will continue to ruin... that's what I'm going to do to _you_.” She charged at him, paying no heed to her aching body begging her to stop. She pushed past the pain, bit down all her discomfort, and lunged at the king, intending to drive the Yato through his jaw. It came so close, the gilded sword actually cutting through a few of the hairs of his long beard, but the blade seemed stuck fast as though she had met a wall. She even gripped the scale encrusted hilt with her left hand, trying to bring the sword down on his flesh, but it would not move a centimeter more towards him. “...what...?” Garon chuckled almost warmly as he looked down at her, his expression amused.

 

“Do you think you're the first person who's tried to kill me, idiot girl? Did you _really_ think your little letter opener could scratch me? And here I was giving you credit... I am blessed in ways you cannot imagine. Allow me to demonstrate.” His hand shot out faster than her eyes could follow, wrapping around Nerr's throat and hoisting her into the air. The princess gagged as her feet instinctively kicked, trying to find something solid. Garon's eyes shone with a malicious glee as he tossed her back into the crowd of Hoshidans like a rag doll. The soldiers she bowled over cried out in pain as they were knocked aside, and Nerr felt the stone floor scrape open her cheek as she slid over it. Amidst the moaning Hoshidans, she slowly climbed back to her feet. Azura rushed over, trying to steady her.

“Nerr! Are you okay?!” The Nohrian girl did not waste time answering, instead charging back towards the king, bringing her sword down on him from every angle. Garon countered her attack with his ax, but she was too nimble to be caught by such a slow, heavy weapon. She leapt back as the old man brought the serrated head down where she had been standing, shattering the floor. As he worked to pry it loose, Nerr stepped on the handle and pushed herself off, hoping the added momentum of falling would be enough to break through whatever spell he was using. The edge of the Yato brushed against his ebony crown, but would go no further.

 

“Idiot girl...” Garon had succeeded in reclaiming his ax from the stone, and wound up, hitting the princess with the broadside of the massive head as though it were a club. Nerr cried out as she hit the wall, feeling something snap in her side. “Trying the same thing and expecting different results is the definition of insanity. Anankos blessed me with strength, and it's thanks to _you_ that he received his tithe.” The king began stalking towards her, any and all amusement he'd shown up till that point gone in lieu of hatred. “It was supposed to be _you..._ _YOU_ were the one who was supposed to die... And you will...!”

“Nerr! Get up! I'm going to sing, he'll be vulnerable, so-- Graaaaahhh!!!” Azura's words were cut short by the ball of flames engulfing her. The stench of burning flesh and hair immediately brought Nerr back to the frozen tundra of Freesia, she was watching Flora's skin crumble off again--

“STOP! Stop it, please!!! That's your daughter, STOOOOPP!!!!!!”

“ _STEP_ daughter.” Garon hissed as he clenched his fist, snuffing out the flames. Azura collapsed in a smoking heap.

“Nee-sama!!” Sakura tried to run forward, but was forced to stop as well as more flames reared to life before her. The king glanced down at Nerr with a sneer, then turned and made his way back to Azura. The songstress lay on the floor, breathing hard as her skin blistered. Garon reached down and grabbed her by the throat as well, lifting her to her feet.

 

“I knew she'd been sired shamefully by some peasant, but I gladly claimed her as my own, just as I did with you, Nerr. But then she turned on me, brainwashed by the savages who stole her in the dead of the night. Arete sang that song too many times for me to not recognize it, and you would _dare_ use it against me...?!”

“Azura!”

“Nee-san! We'll save you!”

“Stay back!!” Garon roared as the Hoshidans readied their weapons. He held the limp singer before him like a shield, reaching up with his other hand and grabbing her jaw tightly. “Take one more step, Hoshidans. We'll see how pretty she can sing with no jaw.”

 

“Forget... about... me...” Azura rasped, gasping for breath in short, pained bursts. “Just... attack him...!”

“Gladly!” Nerr was back on her feet, her feet poised to charge at the king once more when Ryouma's voice gave her pause.

“Hold! King Garon... what are your demands? We came here, not for more bloodshed, but to discuss peace. If you are reasonable, I'm sure that Nohr and Hoshido can come to an agreement. Now, please... Let Azura go so that we can discuss this. She is your daughter- you don't want for her to get hurt any more than we do.”

“...Wise decision.” Garon lowered the girl he held, pushing her away. Nerr was closest, and managed to catch her before she hit the ground. Large portions of her hair had been burned off, leaving an uneven, frizzy mess.

 

“Azura. Are you okay?” Groaning quietly, the singer opened her eyes. They were glazed in pain.

“You have to... kill him... Anankos... he infects everything... don't let him destroy...”

“Shhh....” Nerr hushed her, laying her down on the floor. Garon was still speaking to Ryouma.

“--nothing less than total, unconditional surrender from Hoshido. You are to transfer control of your kingdom to Nohr immediately; any dissenters will be executed.” The Hoshidans behind him grew vocal in their outrage. But the king ignored them, raising his hand as the air around him glowed with a rainbow of symbols. “Also... I require your life. Yours _and_ Nerr's.” A ball of flames hit Ryouma, knocking him off his feet as his clothes and the tips of his hair were singed off. His armor concealed the extent of the damage, but given the way he moaned in agony as Sakura tried to heal him, it was safe to say he had probably been more injured than Azura.

 

“Gods, are you fucking kidding me? Pathetic...”

“Indeed they are, daughter. So, what say you? Are my terms acceptable?” The Nohrian princess slowly climbed to her feet, looking Garon up and down. She could not kill him. She could not lay a hand on him. She should have been terrified of him, but for the first time... she wasn't. Perhaps she simply had no more capacity for fear, nor tears. When she blinked, she was left with an after image of banners adorning the throne room, illuminated by thousands of candles. She had worn pointy shoes that pinched her toes unbearably.

“I can understand your terms. Even agree with them. I can understand why you want us dead- Ryouma is the symbol of his people for whatever reason and, well... you just don't like me. But it won't end with us. You'll destroy everything you come in contact with, but that won't be enough to make you happy. You can't ever _be_ happy.”

 

“Ha! Are you talking about me or yourself? How many of your loyal subjects have you slaughtered, Nerr? Just look outside! Look at the trail of death you leave in your wake! You murder anyone your shadow falls upon, wreaking more destruction than a plague. Sir Gunther would be so proud of you--”

“ _Don't speak his name!!!”_ While fear and misery left her, anger and hatred still held a place in her heart, and Nerr swung the Yato at Garon's throat. He caught the blade, lowering it calmly, not even a drop of blood staining it's surface. His calm in the face of her frenzied breathing infuriated her.

“... _There's_ the killing instinct Xander always thought you lacked. The only one who needs to be stopped here is _you._ ” The king turned back to Ryouma, who was back on his feet, albeit very unsteady on them. “Will you drop your pathetic sword and surrender? Or will you continue to fight and ensure the deaths of everyone you hold dear?” The brunette prince snarled, unsheathing the Raijinto.

 

“I will not surrender my empire to a madman!”

“I don't care if you kill me; I'm not going down without a fight!” Takumi added, summoning a glowing arrow with his Fuujin. Nerr wrenched the Yato back from his grip, her teeth bared.

“You are threatening the wrongprincess; I have _NOTHING_ left to lose, Garon, and _everything_ to gain with your death.” Even before the words left her lips, the Yato had begun to shine, not a reflection of the light in the room, but a glow that seemed to come from within the metal itself. “What the fuck!?”

“Look... Raijinto is glowing!”

“So is the Fuujin!”

 

“What!? What is this?!” In sharp contrast to their almost wonderment, Garon sounded... frightened. The light seemed to swell, growing brighter and brighter to the point that Nerr could no longer look at it. It reminded her of the first time she had looked up at the dazzling white clouds in Hoshido, too bright for her eyes, long accustomed to Nohr's darkness. A warmth spread from the hilt of the sword up her arm and through the rest of her body. It felt almost like a healing spell, only without the fierce pain that accompanied them. The warmth grew hotter and hotter still. It felt like her hand was going to catch fire. When she thought she could take no more, the light burning her eyes even through their closed lids dimmed. Hesitantly opening her eyes, the princess could not help the quiet gasp that escaped her. She remembered how the Rainbow Sage had transformed the Yato, turning it from dull, ancient brass to newly gleaming gold. As impressive as that had been, it paled in comparison to this. The blade was longer now, curved slightly at the tip. Even within the bindings of her scales, she could feel that the hilt had taken a more comfortable, familiar form. Two of the stones set near the guard, the topmost ones, now glowed with a pale blue light. The entire _sword_ glowed a soft azure. Almost in a daze, Nerr gave it a test swing, watching as a trail of light was left in the blade's wake. It felt lighter, more balanced.

 

“What the hell happened...?” Ryouma asked, his voice filled with awe. “The Raijinto feels... different.”

“So does the Fuujin. This is what the Rainbow Sage was talking about, remember? Unlocking the Yatogami!” _Light... Blazing..._ Nerr shuddered, shaking her arm (and the Yato by extension) as something seemed to buzz through her nerves and into her ears.

“Shut up! Don't tell me what to call my sword.”

“Call it whatever you like- it still has no hope of penetrating my defenses. Anankos blessed me with his divine strength!” Garon had finally overcome his shock, and swung his ax up, preparing to bring it down on Nerr's head. She reached up with her left arm, grabbing the serrated head in her massive secondary mouth, the taste of steel and elder magic burning the tongue in her primary mouth. The king's eyes widened in shock, in fear.

 

“Perhaps you're right.” She intoned. “But there's only one way to be sure.” Her right arm extended as she swung her sword, the Yato falling on Garon's upheld wrist and slicing through his greave and flesh with unnatural ease, sliding through the gap between his bones and severing the hand from his wrist. She still held the ax, but the hand that had been holding it as well hit the floor with a quiet thump. Garon's lips quivered as he fought to speak, the shock delaying the pain he must have been experiencing.

“No... no no no no nonononono... this can't be! Anankos' blessing...! _No one_ makes me bleed my own blood!!!” Nerr dropped the ax, and it crashed to the floor.

“You said if I fought back, you'd kill all my little friends, but the thing is, I don't actually like these people. We're just here for the same reason; to see you _dead_.” The elderly king doubled over, clenching the stump of his wrist as blood dripped onto the floor. His face was a pale, sweaty, rictus mask of agony as his left hand began to glow. The smell of cooking meat and the sizzle of hot flesh reached her, making her salivate instinctively. Breathing hard, Garon straightened, grabbing the long handle of his ax with his left hand. The raw stump of his right was seared black.

 

“You... have just sealed your fate. I'll cast your soul into the eternal darkness of Nohr. Anankos will have his tithe!!!” As if that had been some signal, the doors half hidden in the walls burst open, swarms of Nohrian soldiers pouring out of them like ants. Nerr did not bother even glancing at them. Garon was the only one who held her attention.

“You're wrong, _Father._ I carry the darkness of Nohr within me. I'm not afraid of the dark. But I'll burn you away with the light...!!” She swung the Yato, but it struck the haft of the ax, the vibrations coursing up her arm unbearable. Garon used her momentary incapacitation to kick her back with enough force to leave a dent in her cuirass.

 

Nerr hit the floor, but tucked and rolled, springing back to her feet and launching at the king once more. The Nohrian soldiers had washed over the room, many of them heading for the Hoshidans, who let loose fierce battle cries and charged into the fray as well. Those who aimed their attacks at the Nohrian princess met their end quicker. As she cut out throats and severed spines, she did not feel the shame and guilt that came with cutting down her people. These were not her people. They were obstacles. Distractions. Nuisances. Things standing between her and Garon. One cavalier fell as she drove her blade into his gut, but he wasn't dead, still groaning and writhing. Nerr brought her heel down on his neck. That did nothing but pull another anguished cry from him, so she stomped again and again until there was finally a crack and he went still. A whimper to her right drew her attention, and she slowly looked up. A young woman wearing a cuirass similar to her own stood there, watching her in silence. Her hand shook so violently that the silver sword she held slipped from her fingers as tears rolled down her cheeks.

 

“Arron...” She whispered brokenly, looking down at the fallen knight. Perhaps they were married, or lovers, or maybe this woman had feelings for him and had never had a chance to say anything before he was taken away from her before her eyes. Nerr's flesh and bones twisted into a salivating maw. The tearful soldier barely had time to glance up at the shadow that descended on her before the top of her skull was crushed. Her body from the jaw down twitched as it fell to the floor.

“...you're together now. You should thank me.” Behind her, the bloodshed was less one-sided. Hinoka was managing well enough, driving the red-hot blade of her Amaterasu into the skulls and bellies of the Nohrians who come within range of her, but Saizou was having a much more difficult time with his shorter blade. His left eye was bleeding profusely as he lashed out blindly at the swordsman who was aiming for his exposed chest. Silas had fallen, his leg twisted at an impossible angle, but before the berserker who must have struck him could cleave him in half, her arms began turning black as ice snaked up, following the gangrene. One fell off, shattering as it hit the ground. Nerr turned away from the carnage. If she let herself, she would get hypnotized by it. She still had words for her father.

 

The majority of soldiers, unsurprisingly, did not go out of their way to attack her. Given that she was covered in blood but still moving while their brothers and sisters _weren't_ seemed to be warning enough for most, though some fools, either through devotion to Nohr or a lust for glory, still tried to cut her down. Nerr ducked below one sword, swinging the Yato and partially severing her attacker's leg. The split bone snapped in half as the swordsman hit the ground, his screams piercing her ears. The princess grabbed him by his loosely flopping leg and swung him into the oncoming band of cavaliers. They stumbled, falling to the ground as well. One, who still held their sword, swung at her, but the Nohrian girl nimbly avoided the blade, leaping up and landing on her attacker's spine. There was a quiet grunt as they fell still, and while the others reeled in shock, Nerr drove her sword into the back of their skulls, stilling them as well. As she stared down at the pool of blood quickly growing wider, an uncomfortable surge of emotion welled inside her, and she laughed to let some of it loose. It was just like when she had been told she was going to the fete; she had been so nervous, so excited, so happy, she could do nothing but laugh. Her awkward titter did little to help, so she laughed louder.

 

“Have you any idea how sickening the sight of a Hoshidan laughing over the corpses of proud Nohrian soldiers is, girl? You do your heathen race proud.” Nerr looked up. Garon was glaring at her, the loathing he felt for her coming off him in waves. As far as she was concerned, there was no more Hoshido or Nohr. The war had ceased to matter in her consciousness. No, there was only Her and Everyone Else... and Garon fell firmly into Everyone Else.

“Haven't I done good, Father? Aren't you proud of me?” She charged at him, swinging her blade furiously. For once, _he_ was the one backing down, _he_ was the one who was afraid because whatever dark magic had protected him before was useless now. “I'm not showing my enemies mercy. I'm killing them, idiot girl! I'm _strong_ now, Father! _WHY AREN'T YOU PROUD?!_ ” She drove the Yato into one of the gaps of armor, pushing the sword in further and further. Garon went still, his ax falling from his hand as blood dripped onto the stone at their feet. Slowly, crimson eyes turned downward, staring at Nerr. They both had that in common, deep red eyes. Even her mother didn't share that feature with her. Perhaps that was why she never once doubted that the Nohrian king was her father.

 

“It was supposed to be _you_...” He hissed, flecks of spittle accompanying his hateful words. “That was the only thing you were good for... _You_ were supposed to die, then they would all have been safe... But you couldn't even do that right, and now they're _dead_ because of you...” It took her a moment to realize he was talking about Xander and Elise. _Anankos will have his tithe_ , he had said. So that was why he tried to have her killed in Shirasagi; to appease his heathen god? Nerr twisted the blade as much a she could, shoving it in even further as she stood on her toes to better meet the king's eyes.

“Your god doesn't care. Gods _never_ care. They spite us by making us think that they do.” She whispered. “That's why your children are dead and I'm alive; to spite you. I exist... just to spite you.” With that final taunt, she kicked him back, his body falling off the golden blade with a quiet sucking sound. Garon remained still, the only movement that of his occasional blinks. He would die just as he made her live- slowly and in agony. Nerr turned to the room at large where the fighting had not even slowed. Her left arm grew larger, and the pain of magic surging down it made her wince as she lifted the wide mouth to the ceiling. A massive burst of boiling water hit one of the many chandeliers, snapping the chain and sending hot water and twisted metal into the crowd. People screamed, but it quickly grew silent as everyone stared at her.

 

“I tire of this. Garon is defeated. Soldiers of Nohr _and_ Hoshido, lay down your weapons. If you do not, _that_ will be you.” She pointed the Yato at the bodies trapped beneath the mangled chandelier, limbs still twitching and jerking. Perhaps thinking it unwise to question someone who had just killed the king, the room at large collectively laid down their weapons. “Good. Nohrian soldiers, return to your barracks. Heal your wounds. Do _not_ attempt to come back with reinforcements, because I swear to all the gods, if anyone tries to be a hero, I will hunt down and eat your family.” The Nohrians could not take the opportunity to get out of the room fast enough, tripping over the bodies of their fallen comrades in their haste. Nerr stepped over the fragments of stone and metal, her feet squishing in the puddles of blood. Ryouma and Takumi were the first to reach her.

“I can't believe you actually did it...” The younger prince whispered, looking past her at the king's prone body, a smiling tugging at his lips. “We're free of him. He's really dead!” Ryouma remained much more subdued.

 

“Yes, but at a very high price. Both Nohr and Hoshido have suffered so many losses... but time heals all wounds. Our next order of business is forging a peace treaty as soon as possible--” Hoshido's heir went quiet, stiffening. The air had grown heavy and oppressive, the same sort of humid pressure that accompanied a thunderstorm. Nerr looked back over her shoulder, to where the source of the miasma seemed to be. Garon was sitting up. He slowly, deliberately, climbed to his knees. At once, weapons were raised once more, but the king paid them no mind. It seemed almost as if he didn't even realize there were other people in the room. His head fell back as he stared up at the ceiling, his lips moving as he silently mouthed something to himself. Holding her Yato at the ready, Nerr slowly approached him, jumping back as his arms moved, but closing in as she noticed he had not moved to reach for his ax or cast a spell. He simply spread them wide, his mouth moving faster and faster as the sibilant whisper of his gibberish reached her ears.

 

“...what are you doing, Garon? The best thing for you to do is just lay down and die. You will _not_ win this battle.” Suddenly, he stopped speaking, lowering his head centimeter by centimeter until he locked eyes with her.

“...no?” The blast of hot air knocked her off her feet, but it was the screaming that actually hurt her. The anguish of Garon's bloodcurdling yells was palpable as it seemed to drill into her ears and bore into her brain. She watched in silent horror as his limbs elongated, taking on more mass. The plate of his armor cut into the expanding flesh, literally cut into it, leaving bloody gouges before finally breaking free. Every part of him swelled, his spine breaking through his skin before muscles and blood vessels could catch up to the bone. His jaw pushed forward, protruding from his face as his skull grew larger and wider. She could see the ashen skin ripping apart, too small for the bone, as several more eye sockets were carved into his skull. Nerr could feel his pain because she had felt it before, the first time _she_ transformed, the agony of her body breaking down and reforming into something wrong and alien. It was over as quickly as it had started, but the horror had only begun. Her draconic form was large, but this... _thing_ was massive. To call it a dragon felt like an insult to herself. With it's spade-like head and short legs and thick tail, it was nothing like her long, elegant cervine shape. But it was clear that every stocky inch of the monster was pure, condensed power. It swung it's flat head towards Ryouma. A single, glowing red orb rolled around his skull, the same eye visible in bits and pieces through more than a dozen sockets.

 

“ _Peace... Treaty...? I Think... Not...”_

“Gods above, what _is_ this thing!?”

“ _GwaHaHaHaHa... Are You Really... Surprised...?_ _The_ _B_ _lood_ _O_ _f_ _D_ _ragons_ _F_ _lows_ _T_ _hrough_ _M_ _y_ _V_ _eins..._ _A_ _s_ _I_ _t_ _F_ _lows_ _T_ _hrough_ _Y_ _ours...”_ The glowing eye swiveled, and it was as if ten were staring at Nerr. “ _Anankos_ _S_ _imply_ _S_ _trengthened it... His_ _F_ _inal_ _G_ _ift_ _T_ _o_ _M_ _e..._ _I_ _s_ _T_ _he_ _P_ _ower_ _T_ _o SPITE_ _Y_ _ou...!”_ Garon did not have wings. Only talons, each almost as large as the rest of his body. Nerr saw it coming down on her, and lifted the Yato, intending to cleave this abomination into chunks if that was what it took for him to stay dead. But the blade did not pierce the thick hide very far. Only enough to get stuck, bending and ultimately snapping in half as weight continued to fall on it. She was knocked flat, her armored arm the only thing keeping her from having been completely crushed. But a partial crushing hurt just as badly. Her arm was shattered, a massive sliver of bone poking out through several of the cracked scales. Her ribs hurt more than they ever had when Xander had broken them in the past, and she had to fight for every breath, hearing herself gurgle as she tried to inhale.

 

“Nerrida!”

“Nerr!”

“Oh gods, he destroyed the Yatogami!” A cruel, distorted laugh reverberated inside her mind, disorienting her.

“ _Even I_ _A_ _m_ _S_ _urprised. I_ _E_ _xpected_ _M_ _ore_ _From_ _Hoshido's_ _M_ _ost_ _C_ _herished_ _R_ _egalia..._ _A_ _nd_ _T_ _heir_ _P_ _recious 'Chosen One'...”_ Nerr had no retorts. She could barely breathe, much less think. This wasn't happening. She had not come so close only to have any sort of satisfaction snatched from her hands in the last second. It had to just be a bad dream; someone needed to wake her up. The floor vibrated as feet dashed towards her. People were standing in front of her, talking, yelling up at the nightmare monster.

 

“Hold fast, Nerrida. The Yatogami may be destroyed, but the power of the Raijinto remains strong!”

“Don't forget my Fuujin Yumi!”

“And the Amaterasu!”

“ _Ha Ha Ha..._ _Y_ _our_ _H_ _oly_ _W_ _eapons_ _A_ _re_ _M_ _ere_ _T_ _oys_ _A_ _gainst_ _M_ _e..._ ” She could hear them scream, could see the feet lifted off the ground as they were knocked back.

 

“N-- No...” She rasped, forcing herself to move. Little by little, inch by agonizing inch, Nerr managed to force herself off the ground. She could barely breathe at all- it felt like she was gasping underwater. The crimson glow was a hazy halo in front of her.

“ _Your_ _F_ _amily_ _I_ _s_ _W_ _eak. I_ _W_ _ill_ _D_ _estroy_ _T_ _hem_ _N_ _ow. I_ _W_ _ill_ _D_ _estroy_ _E_ _verything_ _A_ _nd_ _E_ _veryone_ _Y_ _ou_ _H_ _ave_ _E_ _ver_ _K_ _nown_ _O_ _r_ _L_ _oved. You_ _W_ _ill SUFFER_ _B_ _efore I_ _K_ _ill_ _Y_ _ou...!”_ Her... family? Xander- he was bringing his massive talon down on Xander and Leo! Only willpower moved her legs, and she managed to push Leo out of the way before it could crush him. She heard a crac

 

The darkness was everywhere. Above her, below her, inside her... It was cold and heavy, and she shivered, wishing she had something to cover herself with. But there was nothing, so she simply curled into a tighter ball. She couldn't tell if her eyes were closed, or if the darkness was so all consuming they were open and she didn't realize. She assumed they were closed. She was so tired, more tired than she had ever been in her life. Rolling over onto her side, she tried to get comfortable, but it was hard to do so when her bed was wet and lumpy. Maybe she spilled something on it. She didn't care. She would deal with it later. Sleep was the most important thing right now.

 

“Rise and shine, Lady Nerr!”

“...huh...?” She tried to open her eyes (they _were_ closed), but it was too hard. It felt like they had been sewn shut, and that was fine. She could sleep easier then. A cold finger poked at her cheek and she groaned, trying to shy away from the intrusive touch. The rude finger simply trailed over her face, freezing all the skin it came in contact with, before trailing along the scalloped ridge of her ear. _That_ was going too far. Nerr groaned angrily, batting away the hand. Her arm felt like it was made of solid lead, and collapsed back onto the bed just as quickly as it had lifted. She could hear someone giggling-- no, not someone. Two someones.

“Oh, so you _are_ awake. And here I was thinking you were asleep.” That teasing voice was so familiar. Putting more effort into it than she had ever put into anything before in her life, Nerr managed to open her eyes a crack. There was something blue hovering over her. Azura? No, no there was too much black to be the songstress. Blinking hard to try and combat the sleep still clouding her vision, the princess realized she was looking at a frilly maid's uniform.

 

“...Flora?”

“There she is! I was beginning to think I would never rouse you today.” Nerr groaned weakly and rolled onto her back. The bed felt horrible. Had someone switched her down mattress and replaced it with one full of hay? It even _smelled_ bad. Yes, she definitely must have spilled something on it, but _when?_ She didn't even remember coming back to her room. She _was_ in her room, right? Maybe that was the problem, maybe she had crawled into one of the many other rooms that had been abandoned due to the leaking ceilings. Her eyes slowly scanned her surroundings. The high, mullioned windows, her armoire, the paintings on the opposite wall...

“...I _am_ in my room...”

“Heehee. Well, of _course_ you are, Lady Nerr. Where else would you be?” Nerr blinked and turned her head to the other side. Lilith was standing at the foot of her bed, her hands clasped in front of her, a wide smile that somehow didn't shine in her eyes the way it usually did.

 

“You're here too, Lilith?” That was odd. Her equerry usually didn't come into her quarters unless she was explicitly invited. Maybe Gunther had told her to come. The younger girl nodded, her expression never shifting even the slightest.

“Mmhmm. I've prepared Bravane for you. You have practice this morning!” Nerr groaned again, closing her eyes and letting her head fall limply to the side.

“Ugh... no. I'm too sleepy. I feel like I haven't slept all week.” That had to be the only reason the damp, sticky covers weren't bothering her. The pillow squished slightly as she adjusted her head to try and get comfortable. She could hear the teasing in Flora's voice, could feel the chill hovering just over her skin.

“I know just the thing for a sluggabed like you.” Nerr tensed, bracing herself for a chill that never came. She cracked one eye open, surprised to see the maid lowering her hand, her expression almost... forlorn. “...Actually... never mind. I think you're going to have to wake up on your own this time, milady.” Against the dark of her uniform, Flora's complexion looked gray. She looked almost as tired as Nerr felt. So she was in charge of waking herself up?

 

“...in that case, I'm going back to sleep. If today isn't worth the ice magic I've come to know and loathe over the years, it can't be that important.” Since Lilith had readied Bravane, that probably meant Xander was coming over to ensure she still knew how to ride- a soldier always needed to know how to ride. But... when her brother came over, it was usually a big to-do. Begrudgingly, Nerr opened her eyes again, to find both servants standing side by side and looking down at her with almost mournful expressions. Were they really _that_ disappointed that she was still tired? “Come to think of it, where's Jakob? I don't smell breakfast.” All she could smell, really, was the off putting stagnation coming from her bed. The citadel was strangely quiet, too quiet considering her brother was coming. “And I don't hear Felicia breaking plates... or Gunther yelling at me to get out of bed.” The blunettes exchanged a meaningful glance, but full of a meaning Nerr didn't understand. “What does that mean? What is it? What's going on?”

“Um...” Flora looked away from her, but before she could question her further, a pair of hands grabbed her shoulder from the other side, shaking her.

 

“Still in bed? Wake up, lazybones! Heehee!”

“Heh heh... you're hopeless, aren't you?” Nerr turned her head to see Xander and Elise smiling down at her. “Your retainers have been awake and working on your behalf for hours, now.” The prince childed her in a teasing manner. She frowned at his words.

“Well... that's their job, isn't it?” Xander never seemed to pay much care to her servants before. Her eyes shifted back and forth between them, their warm smiles, yet oddly emotionless eyes. Behind them, she could see a large stain on the wall. Damned water damage. Every year brought more and more leaks, more and more decay... Nerr pushed the thought of decay from her mind, not wanting to be reminded of the horrid smell any more than she already was. “Good morning, Xander. And Elise. You're here early... and... together...” Her siblings usually came one at a time. And she'd never known her little sister to willingly accompany their brother, preferring to visit the citadel during “civilized” hours. “That's... Is it my birthday?” She asked helplessly, trying to make head or tales of this confusion.

 

“Perhaps we just wanted to see you.” Xander said quietly, his smile almost cryptic. Nerr frowned deeper at his words. That was beyond kind, but so unusual that she could not shake the feeling that there was something he wasn't telling her. Regardless, it was a sorry show of decorum for the liege of the house to remain in bed while she had guests. She wasn't bedridden, but gods did it feel like she was. The princess huffed and puffed unbecomingly, using every ounce of her strength to force herself into an upright position. The mattress squished and shifted below her hands in the most disgusting way possible, the moisture it contained squeezing out over her fingers. She refused to look at them. Everyone stared at her.

“Sorry...” She muttered, feeling the heat rise in her cheeks. Well... feeling as though the heat was _supposed_ to rise in her cheeks. She didn't feel the usual flush she did when she was embarrassed. “I don't know what's wrong with me today. I've never been so tired before in my life...” Elise leaned forward, smiling and paying no attention to the disgusting covers she was leaning on.

 

“Well, you better get it together or you'll be stuck in here forever, big sis!” That empty, vapid smile on the usually emotional princess should have been off putting, but in truth, just being near the girl made Nerr smile, feeling at ease. Even though she was sitting, she could feel herself drifting off once more.

“That's okay. As long as I have all of you with me, I'll always be happy.” She yawned, feeling her mind slip further and further towards sleep. “I had the worst dream... it was awful. Leaving the citadel doesn't seem that great anymore. I think I'd be happy staying here for the rest of my life...”

“...are you sure about that? Is that really, _really_ what you want, big sis?” Elise's voice sounded so dark, so sad, so unlike the brilliant ray of sunshine she usually was. Nerr opened her eyes again. The torches in their sconces seemed to be much dimmer than usual. The water damage was spreading even more, leaving massive patches of black mold snaking over the stones, the carpet stained a disgusting rusting color. Her lips twisted in disgust. Were there _any_ rooms left in the citadel that weren't soon to be overtaken by the rain? What had Elise asked again? Did she want to stay here? Forever?

 

“What do you mean? Of course it is! Better safe than sorry...” Better with the creeping mold and bitter winters than outside where death lived. “This is what Father wants for me, too.”

“Listen to me carefully, Nerr.” She looked up at her brother. His smile was gone, his eyes dark and cloudy. There was sweat beading at his hairline despite the chill in the room. For the first time, she noticed he wasn't wearing his circlet. She hadn't known he could even take it off- it seemed as much as part of him as his armor. “What do you think Father's true intentions for you are?” Nerr almost laughed. A quick snort escaped her before she reigned in her mirth.

“What a weird question; normally, _I'm_ the one asking that and _you're_ telling _me!_ Heh heh...” She looked around, but it seemed none of the others found the same humor in the situation as she did. They all stared at her, eyes wide, expecting... unblinking. Staring eyes, dozens of eyes-- no, that wasn't right. She must have been dreaming that... Shaking her head a bit to clear it, Nerr tried to focus on Xander's question. What did the king want for her? The same thing he wanted for all his children, obviously.

 

“He wants for me to be a soldier. And a wise leader. That's why he insists I train and study so hard, obviously. He's my father! He's given me everything, everything I could ever hope for; this castle, my servants and retainers- he raised me-- ...n-no... no, that's not right...” How could a man she'd only seen once or twice in her life have raised her? Her head felt odd, as did her ribs... and arms. And legs. And back. She must have gotten her ass handed to her by Gunther when they trained last night; that was probably why she was so exhausted in the first place... “Well, I mean, Gunther raised me. And you, I guess. But, you know what I mean!” Nerr glanced around the room once more. The mold was spreading, fuzzy black and slimy white tendrils covering every surface. The windows were so grimy, she could barely see through them. The washed out complexion of the people staring down at her looked even more sickly against the putrid backdrop. She wanted to go outside, on the roof, in the stars and fresh air, away from the stench of rot. “Where _is_ Gunther, by the way? He usually never lets you in while I'm still in bed- it's 'improper'...” Xander ignored her question, leaning down. She could smell a sharp metallic tang on his breath.

 

“What does Father want from you, Nerr?”

“He-- He wants me to follow in your footsteps! To join you and our siblings and conquer Hoshido. For the glory of Nohr, remember?” She answered him desperately, hoping, praying he would get off this tangent so they could get out. The mold was spreading out over her covers. She scooted back, feeling something pop and ooze over her hands as she moved. “That's why he gave me that sword and-- and--” And that was why it had exploded in the middle of Shirasagi, tearing her mother to ribbons, why it had tried to pull her into the Infinite Chasm, just like Gunther who had been swallowed by the darkness-- “NOOOOOO!!!!”

 

Nerr tried to kick against the saturated covers, slimy streaks of blood painting over her legs as she moved desperately to dislodge them. She tried and tried, but she could not move. The unsettling feeling in her ribs was even worse than pain, and she whined, groaning and whimpering at the horrible sensation of flesh rubbing in ways it shouldn't. She doubled over and cringed. Something was poking her in the arm. Shifting slightly, she touched the sharp thing. It was one of her ribs, snapped in half and sticking out through her skin. Reaching behind her, she ran her fingers over her spine, feeling the knobs over her vertebrae sticking up in all the wrong places. It was with a detached, morbid fascination that she pushed back the covers to see the shattered bones of her legs, her intestines poking out through a hole in her stomach.

 

“This is... _He_ did this... he did _everything._ He killed them, he's why they're dead... He's why _you're_ dead, he-- Am... am _I_ dead?”

“Yes.” Xander's voice was grim but even. She could see his insides too, slipping out through the gash in his side. “At least you died quickly. But heroes always persevere, Nerr, surely you know that.” She blinked up at him slowly. The shock that had overwhelmed her in that instant had died away, leaving a numbing blank in it's place. She felt no fear, nor sorrow, nor even anger. The room had taken on a less monochrome hue, becoming more... visceral in appearance. Her bed seemed to pulse beneath her. The smell was still terrible, but there had been so many worse smells. Xander seemed to take pity on her, and explained himself slowly, with all the patience of a long-suffering older brother. “You can still go back. But you must make a decision; you can choose to remain here... or you can go back and fight with your allies.”

“...Allies?” A loud, distorted bark of laughter rang so loudly in her head that she nearly fell off the putrid bed in her haste to cover her ears. But that did nothing, for it was not a sound coming from an external source.

 

 _“Your_ _H_ _ero_ _I_ _s_ _D_ _ead. Admit_ _D_ _efeat_ _N_ _ow_ _A_ _nd_ _Y_ _our_ _S_ _uffering_ _W_ _ill_ _B_ _e_ _M_ _inimal._ ”

“This is far from over, Garon! My sister's heart is strong!!” Ryouma's voice was hoarse with fury. Azura's sounded tearful, but there was still a hint of angry defiance in her tone.

“I know Nerr is still present here!”

“ _Yes,_ _A_ _s_ _A_ _L_ _ingering_ _S_ _pirit! Very_ _W_ _ell. You_ _H_ _ave_ _B_ _rought_ _T_ _his_ _T_ _orment_ _U_ _pon_ _Y_ _ourselves!”_ She could hear something slam into something else, breaking things, possibly people judging by the screams. Nerr blinked slowly, lowering her hands from her ears.

“...they're still in danger.” The former crown prince nodded.

 

“Yes. They are all waiting on you, Nerr. They believe you will rise again, like a phoenix from the ashes, and fight alongside them.” The princess could hear voices, so many voices, all calling out to her. But why, she wondered. If they saw even a fraction of what she saw, they _knew_ she was dead. And yet they _still_ expected her to help them, they wasted time wailing for her to wake up when they knew she could not. Frustration seethed inside her, but quickly turned into exhaustion. She leaned back against the pillows, paying no mind to the pustules that burst under her weight, oozing hot pus over her back.

“Oh gods... do I _have_ to?” The spirits before glanced at one another.

 

“Well... I suppose that's up to you, Lady Nerr...” Lilith's hair was loose, the two tone locks falling over her bare chest, but not long enough to conceal the massive gash nearly bisecting her. Something wet slipped out from the tangle of organs, falling to the floor with a soft splat. Nerr did not feel sad looking at her equerry's killing wound. She didn't feel anything but disappointment and weariness.

“Then I don't want to. I'm _so_ tired...! I did everything I could, but it wasn't enough. I tried so hard, and failed every time. I gained nothing and lost _everything_. Do I truly not even find a reprieve in death...!?” She blinked, and something wet dripped from her eye. She reached up, assuming it was a tear, only to pull back her finger streaked with red. She didn't want to imagine what her face looked like. “...all I wanted was to go home again... and here I am. With all of you.” She gazed around the room, taking in Elise's bloodless face and the charred husk that used to be Flora. The walls pulsated in a uneven rhythm, massive tumors and oozing scabs painting the stone. Vessels snaked across the windows, obscuring the stormy sky outside. This was Hell; not a metaphorical Hell, but a literal place of torment and sorrow where she had ended up in death... and it was _still_ better than what she had left behind. “Even like _this_ it's better than what awaits me out there. I want to STAY. I want to be here with you all and-- and... Where the _fuck_ is Gunther!? Why isn't he here too!?” That was all that was missing- she almost had her perfect, happy family again, but without him it just wasn't _right_. He was all she wanted...

 

“We don't know, Lady Nerr.” Flora rasped in a harsh whisper, flakes of ash crumbling from her lips as they moved stiffly. “We haven't seen him.”

“...perhaps he wasn't expecting you yet. Perhaps he thought you were stronger than this. _I_ certainly did.” Nerr's eyes narrowed as she slowly turned towards Xander, pointing an accusatory finger at him.

“You shut your fucking mouth, Xander. When I told you he had been murdered, you didn't give a damn. You probably never cared about _any_ of your subjects; that's why you just smiled and licked Daddy's boots like a good boy.” She had expected the prince to get angry at her, to rage and yell that she was wrong, which is why his calm nod threw her for a loop.

“You're right, sister. I did not care about your retainer, and I still don't, and I never will. I cared much less for my people than I should have. That was why I thought _you_ could succeed where I failed, that _you_ could bring peace to the world and lift our people out of the darkness... I thought you could be a hero, little princess. Clearly, I overestimated you.” Nerr let her hands fall limply to her sides as her brother's words washed over her. Everything he said made her angry and disappointed and sad.

 

“...why are you doing this to me, Xander...?” She whispered, unable to speak any louder without her voice breaking. “What did I do wrong, what did I do to make you hate me...?” Cold steel bit into her shoulders as he grabbed them tightly, leaning over the writhing flesh she lay on to look into her eyes. His own were sticky and clouded, the once vivid violet now dull and ugly.

“It is not your time yet!” He seethed through clenched teeth, an almost manic look on his pallid face. “We are _dead_ , Nerr; we are not going anywhere! You have been blessed with an opportunity that _so many_ people wish they could have. Do you not think _we_ would draw breath once more if only we were able!? Do you think I _want_ to be dead, to witness the pain and suffering my own blood is causing, yet be powerless to stop it!? But I would gladly die a hundred, thousand times more if it meant you could live, little princess...” Water dripped from his eyes onto her face as she stared up at him. He was wicked, trying to lay guilt on her, acting as though his failures now haunted him... though perhaps they did. Perhaps he was lamenting what had landed him in this hellscape. But... he was her brother, her dearest brother that, even in the face of his petty cruelty, she still loved with all her mangled, destroyed heart. He died so she could live. She owed him that much. Elise stepped closer, her brows furrowed, lips pursed sadly.

 

“It's not that we don't want you here, big sis; we do. It's just... they need you more right now.”

“I see. I have to go back. I have to keep fighting. ...miles to go before I sleep, it seems.” Heaving a heavy sigh that seemed to wrench itself from the core of her being, Nerr flung the covers aside, forcing her shattered legs to move. The sight of the bone sticking out through the flesh was wholly unnerving, but there was no pain. It had been agony when she had broken both legs jumping off the landing in the citadel at Leo's dare, but she had managed to pull herself upright even then. Inhaling deeply, she swung her legs over the side of the bed, bracing herself to fall. Every tendon in her body that had not been ripped apart trembled as she prepared herself. Shutting her eyes, she pushed herself up. And stood. Opening them once more, Nerr slowly took in the gentle glow of snow drifts and ice sculptures so pure they appeared blue and purple in the night sky.

 

“Well, look at that. You got up by yourself. Never dreamed I'd see the day...” Blinking, the princess slowly turned to see Flora standing behind her, no longer a crumbling charcoal statue, but beautiful and whole once more. Her former maid smiled at her. “Have you made up your mind, Lady Nerr?”

“...no.” She admitted quietly. She had not made up her mind- her hand had been forced. “But I can see I'm not welcomed here. At least, not at the moment. When the world no longer has need of me, perhaps...” The Ice tribalist reached out, brushing a lock of hair from her face, her smile taking on a sadder note.

“You were always welcomed _here_.” She glanced around at the illusory Ice Village before turning her attention back to Nerr. “I know full well that actions speak louder than words, and my actions were unforgivable, but... I always cared so deeply for you, Nerr. I tried to hate you, when I was first brought to the Northern Citadel... but I couldn't. Not when you were so kind to me. That kindness is what I'll miss the most.”

“...I miss it too, Flora.” Chilled fingers squeezed her hands.

 

“Hey, now, none of that. You keep acting so cold, you might freeze us both solid. That's supposed to be _my_ job.” Nerr could not help the small grin that tugged at her lips, and Flora smiled wider in response. Her voice was quieter when she spoke next, but overflowing with emotion. “I am so proud of the woman you've become, Nerr. I honestly believe you could be a hero if you wanted to. Now go. Go back and save them and save the world from Garon's madness. We will always be watching over you, my friend.” Pulling her hands free, Nerr wrapped her arms around the other girl's shoulders.

“Thank you, Flora. For your words, _and_ for helping me wake up one last time.” Her arms seemed to be growing colder, but before she could even think to wonder what was happening, the form in her grip collapsed, leaving snow dusting her arms as she looked about the weathered stone of the training yard in Krakenburg. The massive, carved figure of a dragon loomed over her, the same form Garon had taken, this one bound in chains as it's stone mouth roared it's discontent.

 

“It's quite a sight, isn't it?” Turning, she noticed Lilith looking up at the statue as well, her lips quirked up. “To think, that's what our ancestors looked like... Strong and awe inspiring... I never could see myself like that, but you, Lady Nerr... Every time I saw you take your true form, I couldn't help but feel pride.”

“That's nothing to be proud of, Lilith. I'm a blood thirsty, savage monster.” Golden eyes turned serious as they seemed to pierce through her.

“That's not you, milady. That's your instincts; that's what I warned you about. They're a siren's call that's easy to give in to, but I know that's not who you are. You are gentle and kind...” The equerry approached her, reaching up and cupping her cheeks with delicate hands, searching her face. “I won't ever forget the warmth of your hands when you tended to me in the stables. You held me and sang to me to comfort me, even though you didn't know what I was... That is who you are- that is who you will always be.”

 

“Lilith...” Her eyes burned as her throat constricted. Lilith laughed softly, wrapping her arms around Nerr's back and rubbing her gently through the thick cloth.

 

_“Yurari yururei... utakata... omoi... meguru hakari...”_

 

The princess let her eyes slip shut, lulled by both the gentle voice and the almost familiar words in a tongue she had never heard before. The hand on her sweater tugged suddenly, and when she opened her eyes, she was once again in the great hall of the castle. There were no bodies, no sign of death or destruction anywhere. Something tugged again, and she looked down to see Elise beaming up at her. Giggling, the youngest princess threw her arms around her sister's middle, hugging her tightly.

 

“Be strong, Nerr. I love you more than anyone else in the whole wide world! I know you're sad- I'm sad too, but you're strong. You can do anything, I know you can!” Doubling over, Nerr returned her embrace.

“I'll try my hardest, little one.” With another titter, the blonde girl pulled away, her smiling dimming ever so slightly as sorrow filled her eyes.

“Hey. Can you give Leo and Camilla a message for me? This is probably my last chance to tell them how much I love them and miss them already and-- and—” She blinked, large tears dripping from her lashes as her breathing grew wavery. Before Nerr could even think to comfort her, Elise had already wiped away her tears and returned to smiling. “Just tell them they're always on my mind _and_ in my heart, okay? And that I miss them. And that they'd better get along, or I'll haunt them! Heehee!” She sincerely doubted either of her remaining siblings would want anything to do with her now, but she forced herself to smile regardless.

 

“Of course, darling Elise. I'll tell them. I love you above all else. I'll miss you, dearest.”

“This isn't really goodbye, silly. It's more like... see you later. Oh, I almost forgot! You're gonna need this!” She held out her hands, which contained nothing, but looked up at her older sister so expectantly that Nerr had no choice but to reach out as though to grab something. The moment her fingers neared the air by Elise's palms, a gleaming, golden shape materialized from the air. She recognized it as the Yato, or at least, part of it. A curved guard akin to that of a cutlass joined the scrolling hilt to the pronged pommel. The blade remained broken, snapped off cleanly just above the stones set into metal, two glowing brilliant sky blue, the other two inert and purple. Nerr slowly wrapped her fingers around the ribbed hilt, the familiar sense of warmth creeping up her fingers. She nearly dropped it, though when she noticed the air in front of her was empty.

 

“Let me guess...” She whispered to herself as she turned. Indeed, Xander stood behind her, his circlet back in place, looking as grand and regal as he did in her memories.

“Time has stopped for us here, but you have so much more life to live, little princess. You can accomplish what we couldn't, you can save this world! ...is what I would say to you. But that is selfish of me. I should not expect you to fix what I failed to. Not when I've done nothing but hurt you and push you away.” He shut his eyes tightly, the pain in his expression palpable. Nerr approached him.

“Xander...”

“I am so sorry, Nerr.” She could see tears clinging to his lashes. “I'm sorry that I was weak, that I failed you so, so completely. I turned my back on you when you needed me the most, but know that I _never_ wanted things to turn out like this. Gods, if I could do it all over again, I would never let you slip away from me...”

 

“...it's okay, brother.” She whispered, and this time, she actually meant it. Resenting him would do her no good now. She reached out, wiping away the moisture from his cheeks with the pads of her thumbs. “I know why you made the choices you did. You wanted to protect your family, your country... I'm so sorry that I made everything worse...!”

“You didn't, Nerr. Things have been going wrong for so long, things too faint to see but that have had a far reaching impact. I should have seen them nonetheless. I should have put a stop to my father's reign the moment I realized what madness took hold of him. ...he's not well, Nerr. Put him out of his, and our, misery. Seize the future. Do it for those of us who cannot.”

“I will, Xander. I will make you proud, if it is the last thing I do.” The crown prince smiled, the furrow between his brows relaxing slightly.

 

“You always have, little princess. But you may need some help. Here.” He reached down, unsheathing his Siegfried and wrapping her hand around the hilt. She had expected to recoil from the elder magic imbued within it, but the power that once disgusted her now felt like little more than a warm breeze playing at her fingers. “It no longer serves me and purpose. Use it's power.” He paused for a moment, before gently brushing the backs of his fingers over her cheek. His gaze was an indecipherable mix of mournful emotions she could not untangle. “I loved you more than you could ever know, Nerr...” Transferring the Yato's hilt to the hand that held Siegfried, she reached up, placing her hand over his, and taking once last moment to enjoy the warmth, not just of his touch, but of the feeling of being safe and secure. All her life, she had seen Xander as a mighty pillar that could not be toppled, a shield that could protect not just her, but everyone, from all the evil in the world. She had been wrong to think that way, but gods, she missed that sense of security...

“I love you too, brother.” Something dark and miserable flickered over his face, but it was gone before she even truly noticed it. The loving affection she long remembered was back in his eyes.

“Go now, my beloved sister. We will always be with you.” The great hall began to bleed away, fading and blurring like a painting soaked in water. She forced her eyes to remain open as Xander's form faded as well, making sure she took in ever last memory of her brother.

 

It did not take long before she was once again somewhere else, this time atop the roof of the citadel. Where they had held their final mock battle, where she had won her “freedom”. The freedom to be lonely and miserable. Nerr looked around, taking in the spires with their cracked masonry and the windows, now dark and lifeless. She had wanted so badly to return home, but this was not her home any longer. She glanced down at the sword and a half she now possessed. The carbuncle set within Siegfried's hilt glowed just the same as the Yato's stones. They both pulsed, and if she drew them together, she could see that they were pulsing in time, like a heartbeat. Like _her_ heartbeat. She could just barely feel the tinniest flutter in her mangled chest. It was connected to her, it's power was her power. Garon had thought he'd bested her.

 

“No... he will not win. Not this time. I won't give him the satisfaction...! Yatogami... Siegfried... lend me your strength... let me make them proud...” She drew the swords together, laying one hilt over the other so that it seemed that the black dual blade was a part of the golden hilt. It was, she could see that it was, the space between the blades filling in as the darkness was washed over in shimmering light. It actually felt _right_ in her hand, the light from now three lit stones no longer blinding her, but instead, reminding her of the light that used to flood into her cell as a child when the heavy iron door swung open. The night sky turned brighter, the stars no longer pinpricks but an all consuming mass. Everything was white, and Nerr could feel her pulse quicken and the light washed over her, like a gentle flame.

 

_“_ _S_ _emaru boushitsu... rangyoku awaku hikari michite...”_

 

Her breath caught in her throat at the sound, a voice coming from everywhere and nowhere all at once. She looked around desperately, trying to find something _, anything_ other than her in the expanse of nothingness. But there was noth-- there! It was there, there was someone there! Nerr ran towards the figure, unsure of how she even managed to propel herself forward when she could feel nothing beneath her feet. She may as well have been in a void, but she didn't care, running faster, faster than she had ever run in her life. The figure was growing bigger, just a little, but that still meant she was a little closer.

 

 _“Hatenu reimei... anata o..._ ”

 

She knew that voice- she didn't care about the lyrics, the melody, because the _voice_ was what called out to her. She was so close. She could see someone in a hood, violet flames licking at their feet- _his_ feet, she knew it was him. Pumping her legs harder than she ever dreamed possible, she reached out, as though that desperate gesture could somehow bridge the distance between them. He was turning around, he knew she was there.

 

_“Hitori... omou...”_

 

 _'Oh, dear gods, just let me see him one last time...!'_ There was a face obscured by the hood, but that was all she could see because the world around her exploded into red as she exploded into pain. Every fiber of flesh and bone was reworked into pure agony. Bones didn't just reknit themselves; they dissolved completely before turning the raw material into _new_ bone. Her body was recreating itself, and it was the most unholy misery she could imagine enduring. She would not wish this pain on _Hans_. She had to scream, to shriek and writhe and vomit, but she could not move as the pain overwhelmed her, paralyzing her. She could not breathe, try as she might to inhale. Surely, she was being born, but it felt more like dying anew. There were... sounds, sounds aside from the endless scream in her mind. People. People making sounds with the cadence of speech, but that met her ears as gurgling retches and gagging. It was repulsive, and she tried with all her might to at least cover her ears, but her arms were held in place by something wet and slimy.

 

Fighting with her body, she inhaled, a small, shallow gasp of air that nearly choked her. It seemed a battle of willpower to open her eyes, but when she managed to close them with relative ease, she realized that they had been open the whole time. She simply couldn't see. She opened and closed them again and again, blinking as she forced her lungs to inflate with each tiny, stolen gasp. Each time her eyes opened and the world remained dark, she grew more despondent, but finally, a faint hint of color seeped into her vision. It was dull and muted and ugly, but it was something other than the unyielding black that had engulfed her. Feeling her strength begin to leave her, she went limp, as the light grew brighter, enough to make out more color, more contrast... And all at once, she realized she had not been revived at all. Lumps of flesh surrounded her, crimson and yellow, oozing blood and lumps of raw fat jiggling as they moved. She glanced at the floor, a lake of blood and pus. It had not frightened her when she first died, because the world had shaped into Hell slowly, and she had been surrounded by loved ones who's presence mattered more than the grotesque nature of her surrounding, but here and now, she had awoken directly in a nightmare, surrounded by monsters. Nerr opened her mouth to scream, but no sound came out, only air that she desperately needed as she struggled to escape the hold of the creature holding her. But while her body tried to flail, she could only manage ineffectual squirming. Nonetheless, panic welled up inside her as the demons squealed in her direction.

 

“S#e's #o#i#g@”

“#o#s #b#v#, s#e'# a#i#e@”

“N#r#... #e#r...@@” A softer, gentler gurgle sounded above her, belonging to the tendrils wrapped around her. She looked up from habit alone, knowing she could not prepare for the horror she would see. A soft blue met her eyes, like the Hoshidan sky, or Flora's hair. A gentle color that acted as a balm against the sea of nauseating, hateful hues. The longer she stared at the cerulean expanse, the easier it was to distract herself from the rotting corpse she was in. Eventually, she could see white, and gold, and pale peach flesh against the blue canvas. Azura was staring down at her, eyes wide and filled with tears that flowed unchecked. When she opened her mouth, Nerr could still hear the distortion of burbling whines, but it seemed more like background noise, the tone and inflection leading itself to her being able to decipher the words them self.

 

“Nerr! You're alive! Oh gods, you're really alive!!” The songstress gave herself over to sobbing, doubling over and covering them both with her blanket of hair. The world looked less disgusting through the azure strands. Nerr could now make out stone and metal and thick twisting roots that looked more like engorged veins than ever. Her breathing came a bit easier now, even though her chest seemed too small for her heart and lungs. Her pulse was an erratic throbbing in her ears, one that seemed to course all the way down her left arm. Turning her head slightly, the princess looked down at her arm. It was exactly as it had been before she died, wrapped in thick scales that grew over the Yato's hilt, stopping just at the scrolls carved into the hilt. Only now, it was whole once more, engulfed in a soft light that seemed to grow stronger the longer she stared at it. There were sounds in the background, beyond that of the people who still looked grossly misshapen to her. Battle cries and roaring and a cruel laughter echoing in her mind. Garon... The thought of that name alone filled her with determination, one born of pure loathing. Struggling against Azura's grasp proved more effective this time, and she managed to pull herself away ever so slightly. The singer redoubled her grip.

 

“Nerr, stop! What are you doing!? You have to stay still!”

“Not... yet...” She could not put her thoughts into proper words, for it seemed her mouth had not yet caught up to her brain. It took more effort to figure out how to move her lips than she remembered, but then again, it had become incredibly difficult to move _anything_. She felt like a newborn foal as she rolled off Azura's lap, her arms and legs so weak they shook like leaves in the wind as she put all her energy into standing. One step was all she needed, but she somehow managed to take two, then another, then another still, until she had tottered her way over to the massive dragon in the middle of the throne room. The Hoshidans had surrounded it, but if anything, _they_ looked outnumbered. Garon swung his thick tail, knocking Tsubaki and Hayato away. The rolling red orb stopped it's constant tracking, focusing directly on her through several eyes.

 

“ _No... It Can't Be... I_ _K_ _illed_ _Y_ _ou... You're_ _S_ _upposed_ _T_ _o_ _B_ _e DEAD!!!!”_ The Hoshidans, those who had not been present when she first awakened, all looked towards her. Nerr had to avert her gaze, unable to endure the sight of those quivering mounds all swiveling in her direction. She kept her eyes locked on Garon. Distorted as he was, he alone looked normal in the scene laid out before her.

“I wouldn't... give you the satisfaction... of dying...”

“You're alive...” The wet groaning beside her was deeper than the others. Ryouma's crimson armor looked like flayed muscle, his ridiculous hair the only thing that made sense to her eyes. “Everyone!” He rose his voice, addressing the other beasts. “Nerrida is revived!”

“It... wasn't my time...” She muttered, offering an explanation no one asked for.

 

“Damn straight it wasn't! We're gonna kick their asses, Nerr!” Hinoka's voice was a raspier gurgle, but even that sounded more familiar when there was no “ida” tacked onto her name. Standing beside her and in stark contrast to the illusion of a scalped skull she bore resemblance to, Takumi looked... like Takumi. There was no blood or raw flesh appearing on him, just lips twisted into a scowl that also looked just like Takumi.

“It's always about _you_ , isn't it?” He griped... for all of two seconds, before a genuine smile lit up his face. “Just kidding, nee-san. I'm so happy you're okay...”

“M-me too! I was so w-w-worried about you, b-but... you came back! Y-you're really, really back!!” Sakura's voice was almost as gentle as Azura's had been, but Nerr could not shake the vision of rent flesh and organs when she glanced at the young girl. Garon's baritone sneering in her mind came as a welcomed distraction.

 

“ _Let_ _T_ _hese_ _F_ _ools_ _T_ _hink_ _Y_ _ou_ _A_ _P_ _hoenix-_ _I_ _t_ _M_ _atters_ _N_ _ot. You_ _O_ _nly_ _D_ _elay_ _T_ _he_ _I_ _nevitable. Ready_ _Y_ _our_ _S_ _word_ _S_ _o_ _T_ _hat I_ _M_ _ay_ _S_ _hatter_ _I_ _t_ _A_ _new!”_ He twisted, bringing the massive clawed appendage he had in lieu of wings down on her. The warped creatures around her screamed, the sound driving into her ears and cut through her brain. The squealing horrified her, not the attack that had already taken her life. Nerr thrust the Yato upwards, and this time, it did not snap in two, did not even bend. The finely honed edge cut through the thick, draconic flesh with ease, severing muscles and tendons as though they were little more than silk thread. Garon howled in pain, and the princess used his shock and momentary distraction to drag her blade through his flesh, slicing the scaly appendage in half. Hot, foul-smelling blood rained onto her. The Nohrian king pulled his ruined wing back. “ _NOOO!!! This_ _C_ _annot, WILL NOT_ , _B_ _e!!!”_

 

“It can, and _is_.” She sneered at him, her voice growing stronger in her contempt. Through the glaze of blood, the Yato glowed brighter. She brandished it at him, a twisted joy welling inside her as he shrank back ever so slightly. “You see? Do you see!? It won't _ever_ be destroyed again, and neither will I- not by _your_ hands! It gets it's power from the faith of everyone I love, everyone I've lost because of _you!_ Even your children pray for your death, monster! They _despise_ you, and they love _me!_ ME! _I'm_ the one who—”

“ _SILENCE!!!!”_ He shrieked at her, his voice cracking even in their minds. She could taste his anger, his hatred, all tinged with sorrow, her words cutting him deeper than her sword ever could. “ _Impudent_ _F_ _ool--”_

“Indeed I was for believing I could rest in peace while you still lived. Do you know why I chose this path, _Father?_ Because you were always meant to be at the end of it. I will right all of your wrongs! Death itself cannot stop me, and as you will now learn, _neither can_ _ **you**_.” Her once father laughed, a manic guffaw that sounded more like screaming than any sort of laughter.

 

 _“The_ _O_ _nly_ _T_ _hing I_ _A_ _m_ _A_ _bout_ _T_ _o_ _F_ _ind_ _O_ _ut_ _I_ _s_ _W_ _hat_ _W_ _ill_ _B_ _reak_ _F_ _irst-_ _Y_ _our_ _S_ _word,_ _O_ _r_ _Y_ _our_ _B_ _ody!”_ Nerr could feel the magical energy under her feet as Garon drew it from the earth, channeling it through his own body. He raised his massive head, opening his mouth as the power from the Dragon Vein burst forth. For a moment, it seemed that nothing had happened, but then she smelled it. Water. She looked around, past the mangled bodies carpeting the throne room's floor. She could hear the water burbling, as though from a stream. It welled up from the massive crack he had created with his ax, spilling forth in such quantities that soon, the entire room was flooded enough that their feet were covered. Everyone murmured in confusion, wondering what foul magic he had up his metaphorical sleeve, when a fearful shriek cut through the air. Sakura was covering behind Hinoka, though it took a long moment to realize what had terrified her so. The floor was moving. No, not the floor, the corpses scattered about it. They all seemed to be writhing. At first, it seemed they were being jostled by the water, but Nerr quickly realized that was wrong. They were _becoming_ the water. Their flesh grew translucent, revealing the muscle beneath before it too become clear. Layer by layer, they dissolved from the inside, the heavier parts of their armor falling through them in some cases. As the liquefied soldiers climbed to their feet, intense violet flames ignited around them. They were exactly the same as the monsters that had attacked Shirasagi, and had attacked their boat as they traveled to Nohr. It would be so easy to lay the blame for those attacks at Garon's feet, but in her heart, Nerr knew this was not his power.

 

“What are these things?!”

“Eeek! Zombies!!”

“It doesn't matter what they are!” Ryouma charged at the nearest water creature, cutting it in twain. It sloshed over his feet as it collapsed. “We will send these monsters to Hell where they belong!”

 

So engrossed in his rousing speech, the high prince didn't even seem to notice the water rising once more, taking the shape of a person until it pulled a sword from it's own body and slashed at him. Be it that they didn't care that their opponents could reform as quickly as they were cut down, or else, were just desperate to not go down without a fight, the soldiers threw themselves onto the homonculi. Nerr paid them no mind, her attention never wavering from Garon. She had just begun running towards him when a faint glow lapis caught her eye. Azura slowly, deliberately, raised her arms over her head, just as she had done in Cyrkensia. And just like then, her pendant glowed, bathing the room in a cool light. But this time, it was not just the sliver of stone. Hinoka paused in the middle of bisecting a watery paladin as the flames of her Amaterasu grew, wreathing the entire nageyari in coral colored fire. Just as quickly as they flared up, they died down to their normal levels once more, but Azura's pendant did not. It shone brighter than ever, and when the blunette woman opened her mouth, it sounded as though a chorus of songstresses were singing alongside her.

 

_“_ _You are the ocean's gray waves...”_

 

The moment those warbling notes reached him, Garon cried out in agony, stumbling slightly.

 

“ _What..._ _I_ _s_ _T_ _his...!? No... No,_ _Y_ _our_ _T_ _ricks_ _W_ _ill NOT_ _H_ _elp_ _Y_ _ou,_ _N_ _ot_ _N_ _ow! Not_ _W_ _hen I'm_ _S_ _o_ _C_ _lose...! Anankos! Great_ _O_ _ne! Give_ _M_ _e_ _S_ _trength..._ _Y_ _our_ _T_ _ithe_ _S_ _hall_ _B_ _e_ _P_ _aid_ _W_ _ith_ _I_ _nterest!!”_ It seemed the king was digging deep to find the last dregs of strength that remained to him, but in turn, Nerr felt more powerful than she had ever remembered. Azura's voice filled not just the room, but her heart, her very soul. She could hear an orchestra in her mind, sweeping and grand, the symphony giving her courage and strength. It seemed to be having a similar effect on the rest of the soldiers, judging by the renewed fervor with which they swung their weapons. Her eyes met Garon's, and they narrowed in expectation.

“Have you made your peace?” She did not give him a chance to answer, taking off towards him like an arrow. She sidestepped the battles between the living and the dead, kicking up foul water as she ran. The air was saturated, but the droplets that burst against her skin were pure, like a gentle rain in spring.

 

_“_ _Sing with me a song, of Birthrights and Love... The light scatters to the sky above... Dawn breaks through the gloom, white as a bone... Lost In Thoughts All Alone...”_

 

Nerr slashed at the claws that swiped at her, pivoting and driving the Yato deep into the tendons of his front leg. Garon howled, but just as quickly brought the mutated wing that had not been injured down on her. Though she did not fear death, she would not let him cause hers this time. She ducked and rolled, feeling the ground shake beneath her as slimy water mixed with blood and gods knew what else washed over her. She leapt back to her feet, fully intending to rend this wing as well, but found herself instead facing a gaping maw lined with teeth as long as she was tall. She could see down his slimy throat, could see embers coalescing within the darkness there, but could not throw herself out of the way before the massive fireball hit her. It sent her flying, knocking her back into the water. That she was already drenched was the only thing that probably kept her from being reduced to cinders by the flames them self, but damp did not hinder the magic contained in them. It bit all the way down to her bone, the right side of her body having born the brunt of the attack. She could not stifle her scream. If felt like she was once again in the acid of Fort Dragonfall, her flesh being eaten by the intense heat.

 

 _“_ _Never_ _F_ _orget_ _T_ _hat_ _Y_ _ou_ _C_ _hose_ _T_ _his_ _P_ _ath. You_ _C_ _hose_ _D_ _eath_ _A_ _nd_ _D_ _efeat.”_ Her vision was blurry, and she could not open her right eye, but she heard his tail slicing through the air and coming at her. Nerr threw herself down, the water, filthy as it was, soothing her burns. For a moment, she let herself breath, her heart thumping painfully against her chest.

 

_“You are the ocean's gray wave, destined to seek life beyond the shore, just out of reach...”_

 

Azura's voice calmed her frenzied pulse every so slightly. Garon's made her head feel as though it were splitting in two.

 

“ _You_ _C_ _hose_ _P_ _ain_ _A_ _nd_ _S_ _uffering. You_ _C_ _hose_ _D_ _estruction. Your_ _D_ _eath_ _I_ _s_ _A_ _t_ _H_ _and,_ _And This Time, It Will Be Final!_ _!”_ Gritting her teeth so hard she could swear one cracked, the Nohrian princess forced herself back to her feet. The titan dragon was turning around, to either attempt to crush her once more or finish burning her away, but his massive size made him slow. Nerr lunged at the thick tail still in her view, driving the Yato deep into the muscle to give herself an anchor. As the king thrashed about, her left arm twisted and deformed into sharp teeth that she dug into his flesh as well. Little by little, she pulled herself atop him, leaving a bloody trail of footholds in her wake.

 

_“_ _Yet the waters ever change, flowing like time...”_

 

She planted herself at the base of her neck, digging her tooth-like fingers deep in his scaly hide to keep him from throwing her off as he writhed. Raising the Yato high, she hissed at him, knowing he could hear her despite her quiet voice.

 

“This is for my mother.” She stabbed blade into his neck, hot blood pouring out over her legs as he howled. She cut through the cords of muscle as she pulled her sword free, only to thrust it in once more. “And _this_ is Flora!” The entire beast shuddered, dropping to it's knees as she stabbed it ferociously, drawing ever closer to it's spine. “This is for letting Hans run free. _This_ is for the people you turned against me! _This is for making your children fight your battles, you coward!!_ ” She was drenched in his blood, but she barely noticed.

 

_“The path is yours to climb...”_

 

All of a sudden, the ground beneath her vanished in a flash of light, and she hit the ground hard. No, not the ground. The cold, slick steel of armor. Nerr blinked, looking down and trying to ignore the dark, cloudy half of what she saw. Garon lay below her, his snow white hair and beard now red, his throat mangled and bloody. She could see his eyes, eyes so similar to hers, growing dim. And yet still, even while on death's door, he had to make it clear how much he loathed her.

 

“I should have killed you... when I had the chance... when you were a child... there was always something... _wrong_ with you...” He whispered raggedly, his voice laced with hatred. Nerr's voice was just as cold.

“Then why didn't you? Why... tell me _why!_ ” She half expected him to remain silent, to refuse her this last bit of closure, but to her surprise, he parted his lips once more, blood trickling over them even as his ashen skin grew less opaque.

“Because Anankos demanded he be paid... for his blessings... and I would not lose any more children...!” For the first time since she had known this horrid man to be her father, his gaze lost some of it's anger, it's malice. All she could see in him now was sorrow. “Yet, despite all I've done to protect them... my children are lost to me all the same... All I did was for them... gods... let me see them one... final time... let me apologize...” His breath caught, strangled in his throat as the last bits of bone and blood within him turned clear. For a moment, he lay there, like water poured into a container, but the thin membrane that held him together quickly burst, spilling over her.

 

Nerr breathed a quiet sigh as she looked down at the sodden clothes and armor that were all that now remained of King Garon. For his children... At any other time, she would have scoffed at the very thought, but in that moment, she felt he had been sincere. Even a monster could know love. She had been so caught up in the almost anticlimactic end to the battle that she hadn't even realized the fighting had well and truly stopped. The watery remains of all the other soldiers had also burst, leaving armor and weapons and nothing else. Even the blood had been washed away. Azura had stopped singing, but the echo of her voice seemed to linger in the air. She lowered her arms slowly, and from where Nerr sat, they seemed to be shaking. _She_ seemed to be shaking, as though she were utterly exhausted. The Hoshidans approached her, relief and joy on their faces that quickly became horror as the songstress collapsed. Ryouma caught her, lowering them both to the ground as Sakura began waving her healing staff. Getting to her feet, the Nohrian princess approached slowly, apprehensive of intruding on what seemed like a family affair. Despite the glow of the youngest princess's festal, no part of Azura's body reacted to the healing magic. As she drew closer, Nerr could see that her skin was growing translucent in places too, just as it had when she had seen her at the lake beyond the Chevois border. The Hoshidans were in a state of panic.

 

“Azura! What is this?”

“What's going on, what's wrong with you?”

“You don't look good, nee-san...”

“I-I don't know what to do! M-my festal isn't w-w-working...!” The singer closed her eyes, a slight smile on her lips even as her brows drew together in pain. Every huff of breath sounded labored.

 

“It's okay, Sakura... you can't do anything... Not now.” Takumi dropped to his knees, taking her hand in his own, his voice laced with panic.

“What are you talking about? There has to be _something_ we can do!”

“This is some kind of Nohrian spell, isn't it?” Hinoka tried to mask her fear with anger, but it did not fool anyone. “We-we'll find one of their mages and make them--”

“Hinoka, _no._ It isn't Nohrian. There's so much I haven't told you all... and now I can't... I'm so sorry.” Ryouma gripped her tighter.

 

“Azura, you can't say that. You can't _mean_ that. The war is finally over. We can finally know peace, but what is it worth if you can't experience it with us!?” Takumi cried out as the hand he held dissolved. Her legs and other arm were quickly loosing opacity as well, and judging by the tears dripping from her eyes, every moment was agony. Yet she continued smiling.

“I'm... I'm sorry, Ryouma nii-san. But I... I've had my peace. I was happier in... Hoshido than... I ever dreamed I could be. Thank you for... being my family. Please... please be happy...” Slowly, she opened her eyes. The very color seemed to drain from them as she looked up at the other princess. “You too, Nerr. I promise you... everything will be... fine...”

 

With one final, breathy sigh, her body collapsed, leaving a fine mist in the air as her dress and pendant fell to the ground. Sakura screamed at the sight, while Hinoka swore and turned away, pressing her fist against her eyes. Takumi remained stock still as Ryouma's grip on the wet, filthy gown tightened. Nerr just blinked slowly, her gaze falling on the glint of gold and azure that had fallen to the floor. Dragging her legs forward took more effort than she felt it should, but she managed to get close enough to bend over and snag the gilt pendant. It was still warm. The lapis fleck continued glowing, sparkling as she turned it slightly. She could hear an echo of music in her mind. _Yurari yurureri..._ She closed her eyes and the echoes ceased as everything was consumed by darkness.

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A/N- Okay, I won't lie. It took me too long to write this. Helped in no small part by the fact that I kept tearing up while I was writing it. When I play Birthright, I end up skipping half the scenes and rolling my eyes throughout the other half. It's not an emotional story. It's not. The parts that _should_ be sad, such as everything after Lilith dies, fall flat because the story is perpetually framed as a “good triumphs over evil” narrative. The deaths don't matter because the good guys still win in the end and that's what's important. Maybe it's just me, but Conquest's ending didn't feel like it was supposed to be _happy_. Hopeful, yes, but the game still feels somber, probably due in part to the subdued palette. Birthright ends all sunny and cheerful with you riding a pegasus and looking up at a massive marble statue of an angel-Sue that probably took months to carve. It's not just hopeful, it's _happy_. Never mind that the death toll is higher because, according to the gameplay, you killed almost every person you met. Never mind that a young child, the one person who, above all others, was said to give a dark kingdom trapped in hell a glimmer of hope, is dead. Mikoto would be happy... that a young boy who probably isn't even sixteen is left ruling a kingdom because his adult sister said fuck it (and judging by her ending in the other two games, Camilla is probably going to leave the castle altogether, leaving this young teenager to deal with a country in turmoil all by himself, cuz remember that Odin leaves too). Birthright is the same bland, boring shit that most other Fire Emblem games end up being (Pokémon has a deeper narrative than garbage like Echoes...). I'm not saying Conquest was perfect, I'm not even saying it was great, but it was different, and I ended up feeling sympathy for both sides. I felt _bad_ when Ryouma died, I felt _bad_ for Takumi at the end. I felt nothing for these same characters in Birthright, and actively wished I could kill them most of the time. It took gutting who they were and imposing my own ideas on them to actually make me not want them dead. Literal pawns on a chessboard inspire more sympathy in me. Sorry, IntSys, but you've failed on a grand level. Next time, let your writer actually _write_ the story, or just skip the story all together and give me maps and music, because that's the only thing you can actually do well. The epilogue will probably be pretty short on this one, so thank you for sticking with the story this long, and I promise you won't have to endure it much longer.


	25. Cast Me Not Away

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Ch.25- “Cast Me Not Away”

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“ _Say you'll be with me...”_

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Nerr opened her eyes. For the longest time, she simply remained inert, staring up at the dimly lit canvas. Everything to the right of her remained black. She did not dwell on the darkness, instead going back over all the events she could remember in her life in order, as though she were skimming through a book. Her arm hurt, the fingers buzzing painfully as if it had fallen asleep. It probably had- she had no idea where she was, but by the smell alone she could tell she was no longer in Castle Krakenburg. The fingers on her left hand twitched, and she realized there was something in her palm. Groaning softly, she pulled her arm free from the scratchy blanket that was tucked under her neck. Azura's pendant gleamed softly, the beaded chain wrapped around her wrist to keep it in place. She could still remember the chill of the mist the songstress had become against her skin. Suppressing a shudder, she flexed her right hand, hoping to alleviate the pins and needles sensation in her fingers. They weren't cooperating with her. Breathing deeply, Nerr focused all her strength into moving her hand. Even when her arm had been decimated, she could at the very least make her fingers twitch. She had bested death; she would not be laid low by numb fingers. Still nothing. The tingling seemed to be getting worse. Maybe if she moved it manually, that would help. Reaching over, she pulled the blanket down. She couldn't see. A casual glance revealed only darkness. Her eyes were open, both of them, she could feel it, but while she could still see blurry colors on the left side, the right remained black.

 

Groaning softly, she turned her head to the right, her neck stiff and painful. There was nothing there. She stared at the empty space at her side. Nothing. She remembered Shura's warning about amputation, but she had expected something being left behind, a stump at the very least. Her torso was wrapped in bandages, but even through the thick padding, she could see that there was no longer a slope leading from her neck to her shoulder. There was only torso. But her arm still hurt, it tingled and buzzed unbearably and she desperately needed to move it. Nerr did not blink, did not breathe as she continued staring at the nothingness where her sword arm had once been. She didn't feel anything, at least, not in an emotional sense- her body ached all over. Or perhaps she felt so much of everything that it just felt like nothing. She could not gauge the passage of time. There were sounds, dull, muffled sounds of people talking and moving, but those sounds were so far removed from her that they might as well have been happening in another world. Then and there, in that singular moment, Nerr lay alone in a void, unaffected by what went on around her, not affecting anything herself. She simultaneously existed and did not.

 

Eventually, she returned her head to it's original position and closed her eyes again. The war is over, the narrative in her mind explained. The story has come to an end. She did not know what happened to characters after a story ended. She assumed they simply... stopped. She could stop.

000

 

She had been unconscious for a week, according to Sakura, who broke down in tears when she walked into the makeshift tent (which was really just a tarp put up over some blankets). The young princess thought for certain she would die. First Hana, then Azura- she had stopped holding out hope for people to live because that just made it more painful when they didn't. She fluttered around Nerr, feeling her forehead, checking her bandages (the way she cringed as she looked at the scarred flesh that was once an arm did not go unnoticed). She was lucky, Sakura said. They had suffered a lot of casualties. The countryside of Hoshido, where they currently were, seemed to be untouched by the Nohrian army. That was good, she said, but they were all dreading seeing the capital. Ryouma had discussed plans to marry Scarlet, she said. He wanted to open trade between Nohr and Hoshido as quickly as possible, she said. The reason she couldn't see anything on the right side was because they had to remove that eye, it had been so badly burnt, she said.

 

Nerr was only half listening. The sounds being made didn't interest her. They sounded like gruesome whines and snarls. If she kept her eyes closed and sank deep, deep into her mind, she could hear a faint whooshing sound, like the wind over the ocean. Sometimes, she could swear there was humming, but she couldn't tell who's voice it was. It sounded familiar, but at the same time... not. There was little time to try and unravel the mystery voice, however, because the moment they realized she was awake, the Hoshidans had not given her a second of peace. They hounded her constantly, bringing visions of death and rot with them, refusing to give her a reprieve. Hinoka squealed that she'd be back on her feet in no time and they'd teach her how to wield a sword left handed. Ryouma snarled that her knowledge would be essential to forging a relationship with Nohr. Takumi... stayed quiet. He rarely came to see her and when he did, he never looked at her. Usually, he would just bring food and leave. Nerr wished the rest of them would do the same. Sakura tried to teach her how to use chopsticks, but she hadn't been interested in the strange utensils when she could use her dominant hand, and wasn't interested in them now. Silas brought her a fork one day. A massive scar pulled at the flesh from his cheek all the way down to his neck, twisting his normally jovial expression into a half snarl. His eyes remained kind and caring, however, as he assured her life would be okay in Hoshido. Ryouma had asked him to stay on as an advisor, so she would have friends nearby.

 

Nerr had vaguely wondered what he had meant by “friends” until the cavalier casually mentioned that hearing Jakob propose to Oboro had inspired him to propose to Felicia, and his delight when she said yes. The princess once again stopped listening. There was love in the air. Everyone was happy. She wanted to vomit. Later that night, as she tried to drown out the sounds of conversation, Nerr picked through her few belongings, trying to tamp down the instinct to reach out for things with the right hand she no longer had. The Yato lay in it's scabbard off to the side, the faint glow of the metal providing a bit of light in the gloom. Of course no one would leave that behind- it was a symbol of Hoshido's might, it was the sword that slayed the wicked Garon and brought peace to their lands. Nerr kicked it behind a crate so she wouldn't have to look at it anymore.

 

Everything else was lined up in a neat row. Her dragonstone, her hairpin, now just plain, broken brass, having lost all of the jet it had been inlaid with. The handkerchief she'd worked on had remained safe, tucked close to her heart, though her copy of _The Prideful Princess_ was a total loss, the pages torn and stained brown with gore, much of the ink faded away after having been wet for so long. She still laid it out gently, her touch almost reverent. Azura's pendant lay beside her dragonstone, the sliver of blue laid within the scrolling gold the same hue as her rune. Nerr had no idea why she had woken up with it. Surely it belonged more to the Hoshidans than her. She would not question it. She simply picked the chain up and, with a measure of difficulty, put it over her head. It rested just below her heart, and the echo of waves in her mind grew louder. Someone was calling her name.

000

 

Shirasagi had been, to put it lightly, decimated. Many of the homes and storefronts had been burned to the ground. Where trees with pink leaves once stood, now only blackened husks remained. The people of the capital were still trying to clean up the destruction left by the Nohrian army, but the stopped in their efforts the moment the soldiers stepped into view. At once, cheers filled the air, a jubilation at odds with the destruction around them. The hope shining in their eyes turned to pride and joy as Ryouma stepped forward, his voice ringing out over the ruined city, announcing that the war was won and never again would King Garon terrorize their people. Vaguely, Nerr wondered what Camilla and Leo were doing. Cleaning up the dead. Sending condolence letters to the families of the fallen. Arranging funerals for Elise and Xander... She turned towards the west. She could not see the mountains that led up to the Infinite Chasm, but they were there, and on the other side of them was Nohr. A land that no longer had a heart. People jostled her as they pushed past, rushing towards the other soldiers to cheer and congratulate them. Nerr began walking.

 

“Nerrida? Where are you going?” Hinoka's voice could barely be heard over the rousing cries of happiness and relief. She did not answer. She did not stop. She continued walking until the pain in her feet was too much, but even then, all she did was pull her dragonstone from the filthy, peeling bag at her waist and clutch it tightly. She clenched her jaw and endured the pain of her body growing larger and heavier. It hurt more than usual, there was so much burning, especially on her right side. She could feel the remains of her clavicle elongating, growing more mass. It was over in seconds, seconds was all it took to grow a front leg from where no arm had been. At any other time, Nerr would have been ecstatic, or at least curious as to how the hell that was even possible, but now, all that mattered was that she could walk again with only a minimal limp. That leg was wasted away, more of a vestigial limb than anything, but it was there. She could move it a bit. That was something. She kept walking until long after the sun had set. Climbing the crag was easier with three legs that had long claws for gripping and wings for added propulsion. Lightning split the sky above her as thunder filled the air, but there was still no scent of rain. There _were_ gnarled trees, their winding trunks and branches looking long dead, and dilapidated forts.

 

She kicked down of the ancient doors to one, her foot breaking through the soft, rotten wood. The air was stale and thick with dust. There were no rats, not even spiderwebs in the corners. Nothing had lived here for a very long time. Limping over to the corner furthest from the door, Nerr laid down, tucking in her wings and curling her tail around her. The bricks were cracked, many of them missing. Part of the roof had collapsed. When she blinked, she could see tall windows, their huge sheets of glass set in lead tracery. Her armoire, packed with shirts and dresses she hadn't worn in years, stood against one of the walls. Autumn was just beginning. The princess lowered her head and closed her eyes. _My ladyship, please do not sleep on the floor. You'll catch your death of cold that way..._ Nerr ignored Gunther's gentle chiding. The floor was fine. She could move later.

 

Time did not flow at the Chasm. There was no snow, nor rain, no sun or stars. A veil of darkness had been draped over the land. Nerr found she did not get thirsty in this overgrown form, though the moisture that usually collected on her skin enough to run down in rivulets no longer did. Once or twice, she got hungry. Her brain yelled at her to hunt, she craved meat and fat, but that would mean leaving her safe haven. Even getting up to head outside the derelict fortress took more energy than she wished to spare. Lichen grew on the trunks of the trees and covered some of the stones, and she scraped that away, swallowing without bothering to chew. Occasionally, she came across small blind things crawling under rocks, and she ate those too. She no longer tasted what went in her mouth. Even filling her belly did not matter, only reaching the minimum requirement of sustenance was of any concern. The moment she deemed she had eaten enough, she crawled back to the rotting fortress. When she closed her eyes, she could feel a large, warm hand on her head, the weight comforting her as she drifted somewhere between sleep and waking. People were speaking to her, a litany of buzzing voices, all familiar and yet not at the same time. The only one she could actually understand was Gunther's, a quiet whisper that sounded like it was so close, yet somehow echoed in her mind as though it were coming up from a deep well.

 

The words were comforting at first, assuring her that he was so proud of her, she had become so strong, so brave, she had done so well. But as the cycles of dozing and waking continued, he seemed to grow... not angry. Anxious, perhaps. He missed her. He wanted to see her again. They were so close to one another. The buzzing and waves crashing in her ears made her head ache unbearably. She followed his voice half blind, in a daze. Out towards the rickety bridges that spanned the length of the chasm. The closer she got to darkness, the louder the roar in her mind grew, and the clearer Gunther's voice became.

 

If you ####, we can be together...

 

“ _What?_ ” How could she hear him over the waves?

 

I want to see you again. And I could if you ####... As long as you're ######, I can't see you...

 

“... _what are you saying, Gunther...?_ ”

 

####... If you ####... ####...

 

“L#o#! D#w# t#e#e!”

“I #e# h#r! #e#r#d#!” Nerr cringed violently as the gurgling screeches pierced her ears. Like a fork scraping a plate and then scraping her brain. She looked up in the direction of the horrible sound, a sharp pain coursing through her head at the sudden movement. There was something overhead, something other than the ever present clouds and lightning. A white blur grew larger as it approached her, large feathered wings kicking up dust as a pegasus landed on the ground beside the posts to which the weathered bridge was connected. Two people dismounted from the saddle, and it took a moment for her brain to catch up with her eyes and put names to the faces she was looking at. Hinoka and Takumi. She recognized their hair; their clothes were different, fancier, more expensive-looking robes. The moment her feet touched the ground, Hinoka charged at her. The Nohrian girl tensed, her instincts still geared up to expect an attack, but no blow came. Thin, wiry arms wrapped around her long neck, squeezing tightly.

 

“Oh, th#nk th# #ods, t#ank t#e go#s... yo#'re okay... tha#k the g#ds...!” The elder princess's voice still sounded like disgusting squelching in her ears, but she could better make out what was being said.

“What the hell is wrong with you, just disappearing like that? Do you have any idea how long we've been looking for you?!” Takumi's voice was angrier, but clearer still. Nerr blinked, or at least, she did in her mind, very slowly.

“... _no._..” She remembered leaving Hoshido, but that was it. There was no time after that. It could have been hours or years for all she knew or cared. Hinoka pulled back slightly. All the world looked gray except for the barest hints of red in the older girl's hair and clothes. Nerr recoiled from her further.

 

“It's been almost two weeks, Nerrida. We've been looking for you nonstop, but there was so much going on we couldn't get away from the city long enough to come out here. What are you doing here? It's not safe. We have no idea what the Nohrians are plotting- they could come out here any minute and kill you!” Her words went in one ear and out the other. She'd rather listen to her tinnitus.

“.. _.why are you here?_ ” Takumi scoffed so loudly, the thunder sounded quiet in comparison.

“Uh, to find you? It's not like people come here on vacation. C'mon, get up; I'm not setting foot on that bridge.” Nerr stared at the boy for a very long time. Perhaps he could feel her eyes on him, because he looked away, busying himself with the pegasus' reins.

 

“.. _.no. Go Away_.” She lowered her head once more, letting her long neck slip through the ropes and hang over the chasm.

 

####....

 

_“What are you saying? What am I supposed to do...?”_

“You're supposed to come back with us, Nerrida! Sakura has been crying nonstop, Ryouma hasn't slept in days- why are you doing this to us? We lost our mother, we lost Azura- now we constantly have to worry about losing you too! Why are you punishing us like this!?” Hinoka's voice gradually shifted from desperate to enraged, her fists clenched tightly at her sides. Part of Nerr wanted to apologize. Part of her wanted to bat this nuisance away. _'Be kind._.' a voice that reminded her of her own whispered.

“ _...I'm sorry_.”

“That's it? You're sorry?! You go missing for weeks and you just apologize like that makes it better!? How can you--”

 

“Nee-san.” Takumi's voice was low, holding almost a warning. “It's fine. We found her, she's sorry, just... just let it go, okay?” The Nohrian girl could smell the anger radiating from Hinoka, could see her practically vibrating in her fury as she tried to control her breathing and failed miserably. She huffed through her nose, turning on her heel and heading back towards her steed.

“Fine. Let's just go back.” The word 'no' was on the tip of Nerr's tongue, but if she actually said it aloud, that would only spark more ire. There was nothing stopping her from going to Hoshido or leaving Hoshido. She had done it before. There was no outer bailey she was not allowed beyond, no massive, heavy door that she could not push open. The princess looked around, as if taking a moment to assert for herself that there truly was no boundary keeping her in one place. She glanced back down at the chasm. The waves continued lapping at her mind, the buzz of voices ebbing and flowing with her pulse. She didn't know what they wanted. She could figure it out later. Getting to her feet was a harder task than she would have thought, but she managed to hobble from the bridge. The Hoshidan prince's eyes landed on her forequarter.

 

“Your leg-- I mean, your arm-- leg-- whatever. It's back! You're healed!” Nerr glanced down at the withered limb.

“ _No._ ”

“What are you talking about? This is just like what happened with your foot, remember? It was all messed up, then you kept it dragon-y for a while and it healed!” She didn't know why he seemed so excited. It was... odd, wrong, to think that Takumi might be _happy_ that she was back to normal. It felt to Nerr that her blood brother tolerated her existence at best, as though they had somehow reached a truce and mutually agreed not to loathe one another. But that was it, at least, as far as she was concerned. To see this boy practically beaming up at her, his face so expectant, as if to say of course she was all better now, made her stomach churn. She closed her eyes, thinking about the way her hand moved when it released it's grip on her dragonstone. She had to take a moment to visualize it, because it had been so long since she'd had fingers, her body couldn't remember the way they flexed. Nerr felt herself growing smaller, weaker... so much weaker. The moment her spine erected, she collapsed, unused to not distributing her weight on only two legs.

 

“Nee-san!” Her vision blurred and swam as color flooded back, once again only on the left side, at first the dark, subdued hues of the Chasm as well as Takumi's soothing blues and whites, almost like Azura's. She glanced down at her right side. There was still nothing there but a limp, empty sleeve. She wanted to ask why the prince looked so upset when he should have known that arms did not magically grow back, but the the words did not have time to form on her tongue as Hinoka approached them. She knew it was Hinoka, she could recognize the princess even in her new robes, but the red she wore, the red of her hair and eyes were too bright. The red of macerated flesh, of fresh blood that spilled from gaping wounds. The red seemed to leech into the rest of the world, contaminating the one familiar darkness into something twisted and wrong. Nerr could not stop her breathing from growing frantic no more than she could stop her pulse from speeding. The throbbing in her head grew more and more painful. The anger that had been writ on the Hoshidan princess's face faltered, revealing concern in her too red eyes.

 

“Nerrida? What's wrong? You look terrible...” She approached, and the sickening hue of blood and pus branched further out with every step she took. Nerr raised her arm to shield her eyes from the sight of it, but there was nothing there to raise. The more she breathed, the less air she seemed to take in, which spurred her to breathe faster. “Sister!”

“Nee-san!” The demonic retching bended as the colors blurred and faded to a welcomed black.

000

 

She didn't remember waking up. All she knew was that one moment she was watching the Infinite Chasm distort into Hell, and the next, she was staring up at the dim plaster ceiling of a room in Castle Shirasagi. Her mouth was so dry it hurt, her throat too tight to swallow, her lips cracked and bleeding. It was quiet, at least. Even the staccato chatter that always plagued her had been reduced to a faint hiss. It was tolerable. As Nerr glanced around the room she lay in, she realized she didn't know where she was. The windows, with their strange paper that diffused the light, were the same shape as the ones in the room Queen Mikoto had shown her, what was supposed to be “her” room, but nothing else looked the same. There were no toys, no paper scattered around. Maybe it had just been cleaned up, though. There was no need to keep a shrine to a memory when they had the real thing to look at and remember.

 

She tried to sit up, but her body would not cooperate with her. For a moment, the thought that they had cut off her other arm as well, to ensure she could not leave again, made her blood run cold, but a quick glance and wiggle assured her that she still had her three remaining limbs. She was just too tired, too weak to actually move them. There was a faint scraping sound, and the room filled with a brighter light as the door slid open. A tall figure stepped inside and closed it once more, reverting the room back to it's murky darkness once more. As the person turned around, Nerr recognized the shaggy mane of hair that pooled over his shoulders. Ryouma didn't even seem to notice her as he moved to kneel beside her, stopping abruptly as their eyes met. A heavy silence hovered between them, one that he finally broke.

 

“I see you're awake. That's good.” Nerr said nothing, tracking his every movement. The way he sat on his knees looked incredibly uncomfortable to her, but he showed no outward signs of discomfort. Only the way his hands tightly gripped his robe, knuckles standing out against his skin. “Why did you leave, Nerrida? There was so much commotion when we first returned to Shirasagi that we didn't even realize you weren't there for hours. Do you have any idea how much we panicked when we searched every nook and cranny of the town and saw no sign of you?” That was almost exactly what Hinoka had said, in that same accusatory voice. The Nohrian remained silent, her expression blank, just watching him. “We organized a search team for you, manpower that could've been spent rebuilding what was destroyed in the war. Needing to clear one's head is one thing, but running off with no warning for weeks? Are all Nohrians that self centered, or is it just you?” He paused, clearly expecting an answer to that query. She gave none. She could see a tic going off in his jaw. “I know you hear me. Don't just lay there; say something!”

 

Nerr tried to swallow again but couldn't, her mouth was too dry. Ryouma seemed to notice her difficulty and reached somewhere above her head, grabbing a pitcher and a cup and pouring water from one to the other with a deep scowl on his face. He sloshed some of it over the sides of the cup, but seemed too upset to care. Surprisingly, he braced her neck as he held the cup to her lips, rather than just throwing it's contents over her like she half expected him to. She could not drink as fast as he tilted it, the water spilling over her lips and down her neck, but she didn't care, too grateful for the relief it provided for her bleeding lips. When she turned her head away, he let her fall none too gently back to the thin pillow she had been laying on. Nerr took a moment to catch her breath. When she lay perfectly on her back, she could not see the high prince in her periphery. She had to turn her head to actually see him. She didn't bother.

 

“Why do you need me back?” She whispered, her voice ragged and stiff from ill use. For a moment, Ryouma sputtered indignantly, perhaps not appreciating his question being answered with another question.

“What the hell are you talking about? You are a part of this family—”

“But why do you need me? I've been a part of this family for less than a year. For fifteen years, you made do without me. We are strangers, you and I. Why do you need me?”

“You are our sister—”

“But why do you need me?” This time, she did turn to face him, her eye cold and bitter. She did not allow him to break her gaze, meeting his head on. The fingers twisted in his robes tightened their grip, the delicate silk looking ready to rip at any moment.

 

“...you are a member of the royal family of Hoshido. When our people, your people, see us, they expect to see you as well.”

“Why? I'm don't look cute like Sakura. I don't look strong like Hinoka. Takumi's children will inherit the throne before I can. So for what reason do I need to be put on display other than to prove to the Hoshidans that they won and Nohr lost?”

“There are things you can do for Hoshido other than be a figurehead.” Ryouma sighed, rubbing his forehead. Nerr's head had been hurting since the moment she came to. “Three weeks from now will be my coronation. I had hoped that Shirasagi would be well on the road to recovery before I bothered with political affairs, but Yukimura advises me that they are intertwined and I am forced to agree. I would like to extend an invitation to the Nohrian royals, a peace offering of sorts, but my knowledge of Nohrian royal decorum is negligible.”

“Then ask Scarlet.”

“I already have, and she know as little as me. I have also asked Silas and your servants, but they all agree that you would be the authority on such things.” Well, at least she had finally wrestled the truth from him. She wasn't here because he cared, but because he needed her. At least that was less insulting than him keeping up a lie.

 

“So... you want me to be your advisor.” The older man's eyes brightened, heartened by the fact that he seemed to be getting through to her.

“Not just an advisor. An ambassador. You are in a unique position to help lay the groundwork for a lasting peace between our two nations. Were Azura still with us, I know she would rise to the occasion, but... she is not. And so it must fall to you, sister.” Nerr did not respond to his heartfelt layout of the duties he expected her to fulfill. She simply stared at him, unblinking, in dead silence.

“Ryouma...” She said finally, after more than a minute of quiet. “What is my favorite color?”

“What?”

“My favorite color. Most people have one.”

“I-- I don't--”

“My favorite food, then? Book? Song? Flower?”

“What does this have to do with anything?” He asked, clearly exasperated by these random questions.

 

“What does peace for Hoshido have to do with anything? You know so little about me. You know nothing. That's why you speak as though I care about your problems. I gave you advice that you did not follow. I fought alongside you, even when I regretted it. I killed the biggest obstacle standing between you and peace, not for you but for me and me alone. How can you possibly think I actually care about what happens to this country? Every time you bring me here, I leave. You are the emperor of Hoshido. Lasting peace is _your_ problem. This whole continent can go up in flames for all I care.”

“No! You do not mean that!” Ryouma reached out, grabbing her shoulder, or rather, the space where her shoulder used to be. He tensed, cringing, but did not pull his hand away. “I know that you have lost so much. I know that everything must seem dark and hopeless to you now. But it will not always be that way. Things will get better- you will get better. And one day, years from now, you will tell your children how you made the world a better place for them. A place where they can be happy, and you can be too.”

 

...he was almost as good at giving rousing speeches as Xander. A long time ago, she would have taken those words at face value and bought into the narrative he was weaving. But she knew this snake's game, she could smell his lies as he tried to draw her into his plans. He was cunning, a quality that would be useful as a leader. But she was smarter. And once again, in his desperation to coax her into falling in line with his wishes, he proved how ignorant he truly was. Nerr had dreamed of having children, a long, long time ago. She would let her mind drift when she was supposed to be studying, playing out vivid fantasies of beautiful children with lilac hair and violet eyes cradled against her as she leaned back against a broad chest. Strong arms with weathered, calloused hands wrapped around her, warming her very soul and leaving her content in the knowledge that she was loved... But Ryouma would never know that. He would never know anything. She turned away from him, closing her eye, suppressing a shudder as the horrible pins and needles sensation ran up her right arm again.

 

“I'll kill myself before I have children. There is nothing of interest for me, out there, on earth, at all. Leave me be.” She could hear his teeth grinding in frustration, but the prince said nothing, getting to his feet and stalking out of the room, slamming the door shut behind him hard enough to tear the flimsy screen. Nerr knew he would be back, and as the days passed, she was proven right. Some days he came alone, other times he accompanied his siblings, though they rarely crossed the threshold of her room. Servants, not hers, just random props that all looked alike, brought her meals and checked her wounds to make sure they were healing. Her side was no longer wrapped up, and she could see the massive jagged scar where the skin from her back had been pulled over the hole and sewn closed.

 

There were no mirrors in the room so she didn't know what her face looked like. She didn't want to know. All that mattered was reaching up and feeling the mangled brass above her ear, ignoring the uneven, distorted flesh her fingers brushed against. There was barely enough hair to hold it in place. The right side of her head had barely any hair at all, just a few frizzy wisps. One day, Scarlet came in, looking wrong in Hoshidan robes. She thought Nerr might want to wear something a little less broken up, and had brought a gold and pink monstrosity that looked like a flower impaled with several massive pins. It was a traditional Hoshidan styled comb, the Chevois girl tried to explain, but Nerr did not listen to her. She made a conscious effort to keep her eye shut tightly and hum loudly to block out slimy hisses that invaded her ears with every word Scarlet spoke. True to her name, she was very red, her dress-like robes almost pulsating as though she were draped in tumors and guts. The princess could only cover one ear, and that was not enough.

 

“Go away... go away!” It was a small blessing that she did not make a fuss and simply left, though it was not enough. When one of the many interchangeable maids came in hours later bearing a tray of food, Nerr could not bring herself to lift it to her mouth. Weeks of surviving on so little left her limbs jutting from her body like sticks, her ribs poking up through her skin, but even though her body cried for food, the memory of rot and fetor contaminated everything, even the smell of the food she wanted to eat. If it smelled like blood, like meat, a fresh red smell, she could have gorged herself without a second thought. But it didn't. It reeked of sickness and decay. She turned her back on the food, keeping her eyes shut tight and breathing through her mouth so she wouldn't have to smell it. Felicia came to see her once. She didn't recognize her former maid at first. It was a foregone conclusion that the Ice Tribe heiress no longer served her, which explained why she hadn't seen her in so long. Long pink tresses now just barely reached past her ears, the ends tucked under the rest of the hair in a fluffy bob. Her blue eyes were as bright as Nerr remembered them being, but her smile seemed forced. The princess immediately told her to leave; if being in her presence was so difficult, the other girl was more than welcomed to not bother. After all, Jakob didn't and that was working out just fine. A hurt look overcame Felicia's expression. That wasn't it at all, she had exclaimed, kneeling beside her former liege and bumping into a basin of water in her haste. As she scrambled to clean her mess, her voice was soft.

 

“I'm sorry that I haven't visited you, Lady Nerr. It's not that I didn't want to-- ...well... it kinda is... b-but not like you're thinking!”

“...then how?” The pink haired girl wrung the cloth she had used to mop up the water (the cloth Nerr kept on her head to try and soothe her headaches), dripping the water onto her own knees but barely realizing.

“...I can't stand seeing you this way...” She whispered, her voice tight with tears, and when the princess looked up at her, she could see that her eyes were as well. Felicia sniffled as tears squeezed from her tightly shut eyes and slowly made their way down her cheeks. “I remember when we were leaving Nohr. Your arm was getting worse and worse- no matter what we did, it wouldn't heal. But I kept saying, let's just give it a little more time, Lady Nerr recovered from worse injuries than that... and they listened to me... and you didn't get better. You got worse, and by the time they finally saw about you, they had to cut your whole arm off, and it's not fair! It's not fair that strong people like you and Flora have to suffer and weak people like me don't! I couldn't help Flora! I wanted to help you and I couldn't even do that much! I'm sorry!!” Felicia wiped her tears away as she wailed, but they sprung anew just as quickly. Not so long ago, Nerr would have made every effort to comfort the sobbing girl, to assure her that nothing was her fault and she had nothing to be sorry for. Now... she just wished Felicia would shut up or at least cry somewhere else. If nothing else, she kept her acerbic thoughts locked away inside her mind where they belonged, festering away with the other awful things she thought. It seemed that silence did a good enough job, however, because the pink haired girl eventually calmed down, wiping her face on her sleeve one last time. Her eyes were swollen and bloodshot, but at least she was quiet.

 

“I-I'm sorry, Lady Nerr. You've got enough problems without me crying on your shoulder... that's what Silas is for anyway!” She tried to make her voice sound chipper, but it seemed she noticed Nerr's dark expression because her attempts at lightheartedness quickly reverted back to an awkward silence. “Are... are you mad at me, milady?”

“...why would I be mad?”

“Because... Silas and I are engaged? I know you were mad when you found out Jakob was dating Oboro...” Mad? No, she hadn't been mad, just disappointed and disgusted and bitter. But the inner workings of her heart were no one's business but her own.

“That was different. Jakob was my retainer. You're just a maid. You're free to do as you please.”

“...oh.”

“Does that not please you? Do you want me to get mad and make a scene?”

“N-no--”

“Silas is a good man. You'll be happy together.” A slight smile tugged at the corners of Felicia's lips.

 

“I really hope so. He really is a sweetheart. When we first started talking, I could barely stand him but--”

“Felicia?” Nerr cut her off, her own lips curled into a displeased frown. “I don't care. If this is what you came here for, you can leave.” She didn't care about other people's happiness. She didn't care that their lives were moving forward and that good things were happening to them. If they wanted to be happy and in love, they could do it away from her. The tribalist faltered, the temperature around her dropping sharply.

“Uh, n-no, that's not why I came here. This is for you.” Felicia lifted something dark and folded, letting it fall loose. It was a black tunic with long sleeves, simple and plain and decidedly not Hoshidan. “Silas and I were walking through the bazaar in the city square- they've fixed it a lot- and we saw this and he said that you don't really have any clothes but what you're wearing now because you won't wear Hoshidan clothes.” She was right. A few days ago Takumi came in carrying something folded too, but it was much larger, a pile of cloth in too many colors and patterns.

 

He said that his retainer Oboro had put it together for her. Given that there was no love lost between the two women, she was fairly certain her blood brother meant that he'd had his retainer put it together for her. He dropped it beside where she sat and all but ran from the room. Nerr looked through the robes, distaste curling her lip. It was a kind enough gesture, but she had no need for, nor inclination to wear Hoshidan dress. She was not Hoshidan. She would not let people think she was Hoshidan, especially not Ryouma. This was probably all his idea anyway, to dress her up like one of them to better flaunt her around like a trophy. Grinding her teeth in anger and disgust, she'd gathered the offending things as best she could with one hand, nudging the ridiculous door open with her foot and dumping them outside it. Gingerly, Nerr reached out, gritting her teeth when she remembered she was trying to extend what was no longer there, and brushed her hands against the dark cloth. Simple linen, like most of her clothes back in Nohr. Most everything the Hoshidans wore was silk, a texture that felt strange to her. She missed the feeling of clean, soft fabric. Felicia let her take it, refolding it as best she could with one hand.

 

“Thank you Felicia. You and Silas both, truly.” The former maid smiled slightly.

“Aw, it was nothing, but you're welcome any way, Lady Nerr. Do you want me to help you change?” Her fingers gripped the tunic tightly.

“That's not your duty anymore.”

“I know.” She said quietly, almost sadly. “But I don't always do things because it's my 'duty'. Sometimes, I just want to help a friend.” Nerr looked up at her, blinking through her confusion. Friend... A small part of her mind wanted to laugh and scoff. They weren't friends. Friends shared things with one another. Felicia had said nothing about getting so close to Silas, just like Jakob... but then again, she hadn't asked. She never inquired into anyone's life. She almost felt guilty about that. Almost. Instead, she just tamped down everything she felt and nodded. In truth, Nerr was grateful for the help. Pulling the shirt she wore over her head wasn't impossible, but it would be incredibly difficult with only one arm to maneuver. Felicia's hands were cold as they brushed her skin. She flinched, pulling her hand away as her fingers met the jagged line where the flesh had been sewn together. Something heavy settled in Nerr's stomach.

 

“I'm sorry. This must be uncomfortable for you. I can only imagine how disgusting I look to an outside observer.” Felicia shook her head, and it served as an odd sight to no longer see the wildly swinging ponytail.

“It's not! And you don't! You look strong, and brave... like Sir Gunther used to. I was just scared I might have hurt you- I know my hands are cold...” As she unlaced the neck of the tunic, the pink haired girl fell silent for a long time. Her voice, when she finally spoke up again, was a small whisper laced with uncertainty.

“...how does it feel, milady? Like... does it hurt? It looked so painful... I never saw that much of a person not attached to a person before...” Nerr could only imagine. They cut out her shoulder blade- she could feel that when she leaned her back against something. She thought about what she should say, how to describe the sensation of a limb simply not being there anymore.

 

“...sometimes. Not a real pain per se, but... it's a horrible irritation. It feels like my arm is asleep and I can't do anything to relieve that. ...it feels like it's still there. I can feel it, I can feel my fingers. I still reach for things... and when I don't grab them, that's when I remember.” Felicia paused, the black cloth gathered in her hands as she stared down at her once ladyship. Her pale blue eyes seemed impossibly large in the gloom, and they shone wetly.

“...I'm so sorry, Lady Nerr. I just... I'm so sorry!” She dipped her head, shoulders shaking silently as tears dripped from the tip of her nose.

“Felicia.” Nerr called to the maid but said nothing more, waiting for her full attention. “It's fine. Everything is fine.”

“B-but—”

 

“It's fine, Felicia. It's nothing you need to get yourself worked up over her.” The princess paused. “...can I have that shirt now? You probably don't feel it, but it's cold in here.”

“Oh! You're right, I'm such a feather head!” Felicia pulled the tunic over Nerr's head, and she managed to work her arm through the sleeve on her own as the thin cloth flowed down her torso. The right sleeve hung limp, conspicuously empty. For a long moment, both women just stared at it. “Um... oh! Here...” Felicia grabbed the sleeve and tied it into a knot at the base, leaving it shorter. It was still very noticeable, but it no longer dangled, which Nerr appreciated greatly.

 

“Thank you, Felicia. It's better like that.”

“Oh, don't mention it. Maybe one day when you're not wearing it, I can just cut that sleeve off and sew it up. I'd offer to do it now, but I don't think you could endure any more grievous bodily harm.” She smiled slightly, wanting to be amused by the girl's self deprecating humor, but not able to put her heart into it.

“You should go now. Run into the arms of your beau. Try not to trip and accidentally push him off a cliff.” Felicia giggled slightly at those words, getting to her feet and stretching lackadaisically.

“Well, okay. If you need anything, you can still call on me, Lady Nerr. Maybe I'm not your maid, but I am still your friend.” The smile that tugged at her lips was a bit more sincere this time. She remained where she was until well after the other girl left the room, sliding the door shut behind her.

 

When she could hear no more retreating footsteps, Nerr stood as well, nearly toppling over as she tried to find her balance. The tunic came down to her knees. Once muscular legs now stuck out from the hem like bones covered in mottled, melted skin. With slow, deliberate steps, the Nohrian girl walked over to the singular window. Paper rather than glass. In Nohr, paper was a luxury, used for books and tomes, while the sand that was useless for farming found new life in glass. She remembered sitting by the tall windows in her room, watching Xander or Gunther train, or just staring out at the seemingly endless mountain and thinking about “some day”. She could not see through this paper. Were Hoshidans so blasé to the natural wonders of their world that they had gotten bored with them? Frowning, Nerr reached out, pressing her finger against the translucent screen. It tore, yielding under the slightest pressure.

 

It must have never stormed, or even rained heavily in Hoshido. Strong winds had broken several windows in the citadel. The whole place was falling apart. She missed it so much... Digging her fingers into the paper, she tore a larger hole, leaning down to look out. Everything was so bright and vivid, it hurt her eyes. That bright blue sky, like Flora's hair, like Azura's... _Nerr_... Her head snapped up, and she instinctively looked around for the source of the voice before she realized it was coming from her head... and at the same time, not. It definitely came from a certain direction, even if she could not hear it with her ears. She narrowed her eye, trying to pinpoint exactly where it hailed from. Well in the distance, northwest from where she stood, she could see the verdant canopy of a forest. The craggy peaks of the Infinite Chasm could be seen beyond. _Nerr_... The voice, the sound, grew louder the longer she stared in that direction.

 

“...hmm.” She did not have long to contemplate the voice for the shoji doors slid open once more, just wide enough to allow Sakura to slip inside. Unlike the others, she did not bother closing it behind her, leaving that small gap for light to filter into the room. Nerr stared at her, waiting for her to speak, but the priestess said nothing, looking at her hands. Were it anyone else, she would have let the silence stretch on indefinitely, but the sight of Sakura's downcast eyes and gloomy expression left her with a twinge of guilt. “What is it, Sakura?” The younger girl squared her shoulders. She looked like she was preparing to do something unpleasant.

“...R-ryouma nii-sama's Enthronement is t-tomorrow...” Nerr would have wondered how they managed to put together a crowning ceremony so soon after returning to a war torn land, but it quickly dawned on her that she had no idea what day it was, to say nothing of the month. Glancing back at the brilliant blue sky, she was confident in saying it was daytime, but aside from that, she had no idea how much time had passed since the end of the war. She decided it was best to keep that to herself.

 

“Why isn't he telling me that.”

“Because he k-knows you won't care...” Sakura whispered, her tone almost... harsh.

“Then why send you?”

“N-nobody sent me. I came on my-my own. Everyone was discussing who should tell you, b-but...” ...but they didn't want to. They knew she wouldn't care; they didn't want to step into the abyss of misery that surrounded her just to receive an eye roll for their trouble.

“Well. Now I know.” A heavy quiet filled the air, charging it in a manner similar to the air before a storm.

“...-n't--... --care...” The young princess mumbled, her words all blending together to form one long, unintelligible word. Nerr could have just ignored it as she ignored everything else. If she didn't feel like speaking clearly, whatever she was saying couldn't really be that important, right? Still, Nerr could not stand not knowing things. When she heard people talking, her mind demanded to know what they were talking about. Was it her? Was it something she did, something she didn't do? Time had not changed that mindset.

 

“What did you say?” Sakura quickly looked up, her eyes flashing.

“I said, why don't you care!?” The Nohrian recoiled slightly, taken about by this harsh almost yelling. Even though the bright orangey red eyes staring up at her held sadness, there was undeniable anger in their depths as well.

“Excuse me?” The priestess looked away from her, twisting the hem of her skirt between her fingers. Her voice was softer once more, but still sounded upset.

 

“You never care... about any of us... about anything. We were so happy when you came back- Mother said we would be a family again... But it's like you never came back at all. We always leave a place for you at the table, but you're never there... It feels like there's a ghost living here with us.” The anger faded from her voice, leaving only sadness. “...I wanted to talk to you... I wanted to spend time with you... But I know you'll just say no. No, you won't say anything at all...” Nerr stared at the girl, emotions simmering inside her, a blend of anger and exasperation and a pinch of guilt. Her knee jerk reaction was to jump down the girl's throat, to yell at her that she had no right to complain when she understood nothing, but... just thinking of that made her tired. There was no explaining soul crushing defeat to someone who had not experienced it- it was just like explaining how it felt to lose an arm. The older girl turned away from her blood sister, looking back out the hole she had made in the window.

 

“I will go to Ryouma's coronation.” There was an audible gasp behind her.

“R-really? You m-mean it? Oh... Ryouma nii-sama will be so happy! He says we wouldn't have even won the war if it hadn't been for you.”

“...is that so...” She was surprised he would even give her any credit to begin with, but he was probably spinning the story so that her Hoshidan pride had made her strong enough to slay the wicked Nohrians who stood against their desire for peace. Sakura was still talking.

“--isn't much time. We all have our outfits for the ceremony, but I'm sure Oboro-san could find something for you to--”

“No.”

“Huh?” Nerr looked over her shoulder, seeing nothing but the wall because she had turned to the right meaning Sakura was looking at an empty socket surrounded by melted flesh.

 

“I'm not wearing a kimono or whatever you call them. What I have on now is fine.” She imagined the young girl looking her up and down, probably frowning slightly.

“B-but—”

“But nothing. If it is truly my presence that is desired, and not what I represent, then it shouldn't matter how I'm dressed.” When Sakura didn't say anything for a long time, Nerr turned to face her better. She was fiddling with the tassels affixed to her cloak. Red tassels, red strings like shreds of muscle that looked like they could just be peeled off from her arm after the javelin hit it. She turned away quickly, fixating her gaze on the blue, blue sky. Almost at once, her breathing, which she didn't even notice growing frantic, began to calm.

 

“I-I guess you're right... I've never seen that dress before.”

“Felicia gave it to me.”

“Oh. Well... I-it's pretty. It suits you, nee-sama. I... I'm going to go tell Ryouma nii-sama that you are coming to the Enthronement. That'll at least be one less thing for him to worry about. He's been so stressed over having the Nohrian royals come--”

“Wait, what? Nohrian-- you mean Leo and Camilla!?” Gods above, how had she not heard about that? How long had she been in this room, or at the Chasm or in Hoshido? What year was it? She spun around, rushing towards Sakura and grabbing her shoulder tightly. “They're coming here? To Hoshido? Tomorrow!?” Her sister stared up at her with wide, fearful eyes. Nerr could only imagine what kind of crazed monster she looked like, but she didn't care.

 

“Y-y-yes! Th-they're already in Hoshido- they'll be arriving in Shirasagi tomorrow...” She let her go, turning around once more and running her hand through her choppy, frayed hair. She could feel the grease clinging to the strands. Leo and Camilla would be here. She hadn't seen them since... since Elise and Xander were still alive. She hadn't even said goodbye... but that didn't matter. They would be here tomorrow, they would be close to her again. For a moment, a shining imagine of them embracing lit up her mind, a glorious dream where they came to rescue her and take her home... Of course, that couldn't happen, but it was so vivid, so beautiful and perfect that she could not shake it. Lowering her hand, she walked back over to the window, feeling like she was trapped in some sort of dream state. The clouds were so white. The voice calling to her was louder now, but it seemed less pressing than it normally did. Her siblings were coming. Maybe they could be a family again, if only for a few seconds. She wanted that so badly...

000

 

Nerr could not tell if the crowd in Shirasagi was larger or smaller than it had been the day her mother had died and the war had begun in earnest. It looked big, but she could barely see. Everything was so bright. It had been so long since she'd felt sunlight on her skin. Even though her sleeve was long and her tights covered everything but her toes, the Nohrian girl still felt as though she was on fire. Suppressing a shudder, she eased further into the shade cast by the new statue to adorn the town square. Gone was the coiled figure of the Dawn Dragon the Hoshidans worshiped, and in it's place stood a figure they seemed to revere even more. Her mother looked as serene chiseled from marble as she had in flesh. Nerr's most vivid memory of the late empress dowager was of her face pale and twisted in pain as she died. She stopped thinking about that.

 

Her Hoshidan siblings were standing in the the full sun, wearing long, complex robes that looked heavy and hot. There was so much red, red and gold and bones split in half and oozing marrow onto the floor-- She looked up at the sky, shielding her eye from the intense light. That was a little better. Scarlet stood amongst the royal family- apparently, she and Ryouma had made their engagement official, and they would be wed sometime later that week. All Nerr had paid attention to from the randomly snatched gossip she heard was that no one was pleased to know their new empress consort would be a Nohrian. Bad enough the last one had been a foreigner, but at least she looked Hoshidan. The princess couldn't pinpoint where the voice that had sneered that tidbit had come from- the whispers where everywhere, ebbing and flowing every time she tried to concentrate on something in particular. None of the voices sounded familiar.

 

She couldn't see her brother and sister anywhere. Maybe they hadn't come. Maybe people noticed that she was busy scanning the crowd instead of watching Ryouma, decked out in robes and armor much more ornate than his usual attire and atop a raised platform. She must have stood out like a sore thumb in her black on black. She prayed Camilla and Leo would do the same. People were talking. Men and women who looked almost as elegant as the royals were stepping forward, kneeling before the high prince. Nerr recognized Lord Izana and Fuuga. There was no two-tone head of curls; Shura was not there. She wondered if Ryouma had kept his promise to pay the duke for his aid. Maybe he just hadn't wanted to see the royal family again. A man with dusky blue hair limped forward. One of Yukimura's legs was held in some sort of very mechanical looking splint.

 

“People of Hoshido!” He addressed the crowd. “Let it be known that on this day, Ametsuchi Ryouma, High Prince of Hoshido, has succeeded Empress-Dowager Mikoto. He takes the throne at the cusp of a new era of peace in our land. Ryouma-sama...” He bowed to the prince, handing him a simple wooden scepter. It seemed odd to Nerr that there was no crown in sight, but maybe it was somehow buried in Ryouma's hair. The brunette smiled as he took the staff.

“Thank you, Yukimura-san.” Fixing his expression into a sterner look, he addressed his people. “My people. As emperor, I vow to uphold the values my mother represented so well. Justice. Charity. Equality. And above all... peace. We shall lead the world into a new age of prosperity.” Applause erupted in the square. Nerr's fingers twisted in the cloth of her tunic. In front of her, the Hoshidan royals were talking amongst themselves.

 

“Nii-sama looks so r-regal! I-I'm so happy....” Given the ways she was sniffling almost nonstop, constantly reaching up to dab at her eyes, it seemed “happy” was a bit of a stretch for the youngest princess. Scarlet reached out, pulling her into a half hug.

“You okay, Sakura? Why are you crying? This is a great day!” The priestess nodded slightly.

“I-I know... I was just thinking of how happy this would make Mother... and Azura... and Hana...!” Her face crumpled as she wept silently. The Chevois woman cringed slightly, but patted the younger girl on the head.

“Hey, cheer up. You know they're happy, and they wouldn't want you crying over them when you should be happy too.”

“That's right.” Hinoka put a hand on her sister's shoulder, though her own smile looked a bit forced. “That's right. They're probably watching over us right now, tearing up themselves...” She trailed off, quickly fisting away a tear that had started trickling down her cheek. With the crowd now calm once more, Ryouma raised his voice to reach them all. With his fist raised, and his expression so severe, he looked downright pissed.

 

“Before you all leave this day and return to your lives, I have a few more words for you. ….With any war comes casualties. But the casualties of this war have been almost too much to bear.” Nerr felt her jaw tense- Xander would have made a similar speech, and now Camilla was going to have to-- “I speak, of course, of our beloved Empress Mikoto.” A hateful chill surged through her blood. What about all of the soldiers, the civilians? She wasn't even thinking of the Nohrians- their grief would be felt on the other side of the Chasm, but what of the Hoshidans who had fallen in this wretched power play? Was their loss not too much to bear? Was Azura's bearable by comparison? He was still talking, but the new emperor glanced over his shoulder for a split second at her. Perhaps he could feel her glaring at the back of his head.

 

“Still, we must move forward. The crisis out world faced is finally at an end, the killing has stopped, and now, our children and our children's children can finally know peace. After generations of war between our countries, we have made peace with Nohr.” The hopeful looks directed at Ryouma turned bitter and dark, but he continued. “I know some of you here probably find that difficult to believe, but there can be no light without shadow. The two compliment each other... And so, too, do the two greatest empires that ever were. But the divide has grown too pronounced. We cannot grow brighter and brighter whilst to the west, children die from hunger. We in Hoshido must share our light, and our bounty--”

 

“And what do those anyan devils share with us?!” An outraged voice from the back of the crowd called out. “Nothing but death and destruction!” Murmured agreements swept over the crowd, more voices speaking up, bolstered by the knowledge they were not alone.

“To hell with the Nohrians! They deserve all the suffering they endure.”

“Mikoto-sama made a barrier to keep them out and now you want them waltzing in!?”

 

“No, she did not!” Ryouma yelled back, his deep voice silencing the crowd. “My mother's barrier did not keep Nohrians out. It drained from them the will to fight. Which is why provinces like Mokushuu and Izumo regularly traded with them. The magic our empress used was meant to foster peace. Unfortunately, she could not, or simply did not, think to apply that same magic to her own people. All Nohrians are not savage, war-mongering demons. They are people, just the same as you. For all the destruction King Garon wrought upon our land, we paid Nohr back in kind.” A cheer went up among the crowd. “Stop it! Stop that!” Ryouma seemed to be getting frustrated. “Do you not see what you are doing? You are celebrating murder! You cheer the thought of people dying, people with families, people who were loved, and yet you think yourselves better than the Nohrians?

...I will be the first to admit that I was like you. I wanted to grind my foes to dust so that they would never again be a threat to my homeland. And then I did just that. And I regret it every day. I regret following my father's example rather than my mother's. I regret thinking in terms of 'us' and 'them'. There is no us and them! We _are_ them- the only difference is we were lucky enough to be born in a land blessed by the gods. We were lucky enough to not have famine after famine leave our country a wasteland. And as the gods are my witness, no longer will I allow us to take that for granted. We have much to learn from our Nohrian brothers and sisters, and we shall. We will move forward on the same path towards a brighter future. Together. ...Thank you for your time, and may the gods bless you.” He stepped down, and while there was applause, it sounded much more subdued, more reluctant, than before. The buzz of whispers, some disbelieving, most upset, was louder than the clapping. The new emperor approached his siblings, and Nerr spoke up before she could stop herself.

 

“That was some speech. I'm surprised all the crying didn't distract you.” She glanced over at Sakura, Hinoka and Scarlet, who were all quickly wiping their eyes. “I'd have sworn the people were actually buying it... until you started sympathizing with Nohr. Good job on ruining your political future.”

“Yes, I'd noticed that... the anger, not the crying.” Ryouma frowned deeply, his expression dark. “I don't know why I always thought peace would be simple. ...perhaps because I only thought of peace for Hoshido. Perhaps if you had kept your word and left us in Chevalier, I would still only think about peace for Hoshido. I wouldn't have seen the Nohrian's suffering- I'd have just seen the enemy.” He sighed deeply. Nerr stared at him, her eye constantly darting to the crimson plates of his armor and away again. Her head was killing her.

“I think about that too. Well... regardless of the reason, you sound like an actual leader now.” Her blood brother smiled at her words, a smile she did not return.

 

“I'm glad you think so. When I was writing my speech, I wondered to myself, 'how would Nerrida talk about the Nohrians?' ...and then I had to scratch out a lot of swearing and remember not to refer to the crowd as 'fucking idiots'.” The other royals laughed at that, and it seemed the tension had finally eased off a bit. “Hopefully you all didn't notice how nervous I was up there.” Nerr didn't blame him for being nervous- she had honestly been expecting someone to try and assassinate him. Takumi spoke up, his face brighter and more open than she had ever seen it.

“You looked collected and regal. Not that I'm surprised- this is the great Ryouma we're talking about.”

“It was quite a moment when Yukimura-san handed you the scepter.” Hinoka beamed.

“Indeed. It was quite a moving scene...” A sultry voice cooed from behind them. Nerr whipped around, nearly falling in her haste to see the source of that oh so familiar voice. Camilla and Leo were dressed similarly to her, though their clothes were lavish and ornate, befitting royalty. Her heart raced but her expression felt as though it stayed the same. Given that most of her face was stiff, the thick scar tissue from the burns she'd suffered making it painful to emote, that wasn't too surprising. Ryouma stepped forward and bowed lowly.

 

“Prince Leo. Princess Camilla. I am honored you could make it today.”

“Well, it wouldn't do for Hoshido's 'newest allies' to miss the emperor's coronation, would it?” Leo's voice was amiable enough, but there was a marked chill in his tone, as well as his eyes as they darted over to Nerr. She looked away from him, angling her right side away from his gaze. “I'm surprised you didn't start crying, Nerr. You're usually prone to an excess of emotion, especially when it comes to moving things.”

“Oh, I thought it was moving... my bowels.” She retorted without thinking, a pure instinct to match wits with her little brother. “I know you've been busy since the war ended. I'm certain you've had more pressing concerned than making nice with the enemy. Still... I'm so happy to see you both...”

 

“...yes, because that rictus grimace of agony screams 'happy'...” Gods, was it that bad? She turned further away, nearly turning her back on them.

“Why are you hiding from us, Nerr?” Camilla asked quietly, her voice growing louder as the click of heels on cobbled street approached. “Bad enough you left without so much as a goodbye, now you won't even look at us? Have you grown that tired of us?”

“No, Camilla--” The older woman put a hand on her shoulder, only there was no shoulder there. She gasped, recoiling.

“Oh gods! What happened to you?! Your arm--”

“War. War happened.” The younger princess stiffened, staring at the ground with such intensity her eye hurt. Had she been just as horrified stumbling upon Elise and Xander's bodies? Had she thought that was why Nerr seemingly left without a word? Leo's voice remained cold.

 

“You're alive. That's more than can be said for some people...” Once again, the tension returned. Scarlet stepped forward, her hand on Ryouma's elbow and her voice jovial, though it seemed a bit forced.

“So! How are you liking Hoshido? This is your first time here, isn't it?” Ham fisted an approach though it was, she at least managed to shift the subject.

“Hoshido is a beautiful country.” Camilla admitted. “It looks like something out of a fantasy painting. It's hard to believe the sky can be so blue all the time.”

“It's warm.” The Nohrian prince said bluntly, but Nerr felt the weight behind his words. She still marveled over how mild weather was here. It felt so strange to not be woken up by shivering, to not contend with freezing wind and blizzards that could mean death at any moment... “Although I can't say I'm fully comfortable walking around here just yet, what with all the curses, insults, death threats, and people spitting at me.”

 

“Maybe you should try dressing less Nohrian.” Takumi intoned with a shrug, flinching as Nerr affixed him with a resentful glare, one that Leo mirrored. “What? I'm not saying it as an insult- it's only been two months since Nohrian soldiers all but burned Shirasagi to the ground. People aren't going to take too kindly to seeing someone walking around, rubbing their... Nohrian-ness in everyone's faces. We have tailors here...” He trailed off weakly. Camilla tittered, though when the younger princess glanced at her, she could see her face looked stiff.

“Perhaps we will 'go native', so to speak. Hoshidans do such lovely things with silk. I'm certain Elise would have loved to--” She broke off, covering her face with her hands and sobbing openly. Leo was at his sister's side at once, rubbing her back comfortingly. Nerr stepped back, feeling her heart thud painfully. They looked like a family, sharing their grief, their love. She was intruding, just by looking at them. She belonged in their fold no more than she belonged in the Hoshidans'. She turned away, unable to bear the sight of them- she could practically see Xander and Elise beside them, an after image that would not fade. Ryouma's voice was heavy and plaintive.

 

“I am so sorry for your loss. Those who fell in the war will never be forgotten. We won't easily forget how many lives were lost to Hoshidan blades... Nerrida will never let us, I assure you. All we can do from this point forward to atone is prevent such destruction from ever happening again...” Camilla lowered hands, her eyes bloodshot and cold.

“Right you are, Emperor Ryouma. But you'll have to forgive me if your words ring rather hollow to me. If I were involved in the death of your youngest sister, would you truly believe I could ever atone?”

“...no.” He whispered. “Were it in my power as emperor, my first act would be to bring back your family. Azura as well- it is cruel that she was taken from all of us just as the war came to an end...”

“I miss Azura nee-sama so much...!” Sakura wailed, burying her face in her arms. Hinoka's hands balled into fists as she muttered to herself, her voice tight with tears as well.

“I didn't spend enough time with her when I had the chance...”

 

“Again with the crying?” Takumi sounded exasperated as he looked at his sisters. “Look, it might have taken me a while to warm up to Azura, but in the end... I-I really miss her, too...” His voice cracked slightly, and he finished in a whisper. Leo seemed as uncomfortable with the display as Nerr would have if she were paying attention to anything but the demonic buzzing in her head.

“...you all are going to need to learn to hold it together if you're to attend my coronation. I will tolerate no maudlin sentiments. We can't have all of Nohr thinking Hoshidans are such emotional fools. It would only add insult to injury.” Nerr's head snapped up at those words.

“ _Your_ coronation...? But... Camilla is the heir apparent...” She looked between her siblings, breathing growing quicker. Was Camilla even standing there? Maybe she was just imagining it, maybe she had watched her sister die as well and had forgotten it, or maybe she was just dreaming. Maybe she was dead and this was hell again and everything would turn red once more ' _Is this a nightmare? Am I dreaming? Am I even alive right now...?!_ ' She could barely hear her own frantic thoughts over the roaring sound in her ears.

 

“--ly right, sweetie. I was.” She had no idea how long Camilla had been speaking before she'd heard her. “But I all but begged Leo to take my place, and he graciously agreed. I have no desire to rule a kingdom, and I doubt I would be anything but mediocre. Nohr needs better than me right now...” She paused, and glanced at Nerr, her eyes a myriad of emotion. “Truth be told... had anything ever happened to Xander, I had intended to let you ascend the throne in my place, Nerr. ...I always knew you had it in you to be a fantastic leader...” She trailed off, looking forlorn. Silence fell over them, so heavy Nerr could feel her shoulders hurt. If anything had happened to Xander... How could that “if” seem like it had been so long ago? She could not imagine ruling Nohr. Sitting on the throne that was meant to be her brother's, wearing the crown that was meant to be her brother's... Where was he buried? He was screaming in her mind, a bitter cry of anger and sorrow. She wanted to see him. To know where he was, so be close to him, to know the exact place his voice would come from, unlike hearing it come from everywhere like Gunther's.

 

“So there you have it.” Leo said, his expression never shifting from that hard facade. “You all should know that I have big plans for Nohr. I think a bit of... shall we say, competition? Would do Hoshidans well. They can do without quite so much cheap entertainment in Nestra.”

“What, you're gonna ban Hoshidans from certain parts of the country?” Takumi asked in disbelief.

“Of course not- what would that accomplish? I'm going to raise taxes for tourists.”

“That's even worse!” Scarlet half laughed. Frowning, the prince- no... future king... turned on his heel. Before he could take more than a step away, Nerr pinched his short cape between her fingers. He paused, but did not look at her.

“Yes?”

“...where are Elise and Xander? I... I would like to see them...” She whispered. _'I would like to go home...'_

 

“They are buried in the royal cemetery, just as all royals are. At least, those who's bodies we find.” The accusation in his voice was unmissable, but it was his next words that actually hurt. “But it doesn't matter, because you will not be seeing them.”

“What!?”

“Why the hell not?!”

“What are you talking about?” Her blood siblings voiced aloud the onslaught of thoughts that flooded her mind. Her mouth remained closed, silent.

“Prince-- King Leo, surely you don't intend to deny Nerrida a chance to say goodbye to her family...” Ryouma reasoned. Leo's face was as hard and cold as Xander's had been when they crossed paths in Cyrkensia. He looked so much older than 16 years in his hate.

 

“I do, in fact, Emperor Ryouma. Regardless of reasons, regardless of justification, you,” He pointed at Nerr, who was still weakly clutching his cape. “Are still directly responsible for the deaths of more than half of the royal family. The Hoshidans may have killed our soldiers, but they were enemies. You were one of us, Nerr. And you betrayed us. Most of the kingdom is demanding your head on a pike, and regardless of who you might be- or rather, had once been- to us, the people deserve justice. ...If you ever return to Nohr, you will be executed.” The Hoshidans were outraged on her behalf, but all Nerr felt was a cold, numb detachment. The people, the world she once loved so much, wanted her dead.

“...so when can I come home...?” Her younger brother sighed, looking like he had lived countless lifetimes of pain.

“...stay in Hoshido, Nerr. Don't be responsible for us losing another family member.” He pulled his cape from her, walking away without so much as a word of goodbye. Camilla took a step to follow him, but stopped, turning back to her hosts.

 

“Please don't think poorly of Leo because of this. He simply... he's under a great deal of stress at the moment. One of his retainers left without a word, along with one of mine, and he's heartbroken.”

“We understand all too well, Princess Camilla. A canyon is not carved in a day, and neither is a solid relationship between Nohr and Hoshido. However, I sincerely hope time will work to heal at least some of these wounds.” Ryouma's voice was warm, his expression open and sincere. Nerr didn't trust him one bit, but Camilla seemed to, because her smile looked a little less strained as.

“As do I. I must take my leave, everyone, but I look forward to seeing you at the coronation ceremony.” She dipped into a curtsy as the Hoshidans and Scarlet bowed.

 

Nerr remained as she was, hand still raised though there was nothing for her to hold. As her sister walked away after Leo, the brightly lit world seemed to grow a bit dimmer, duller, as if the true source of light was vanishing. Returning to Nohr was a death sentence. It was almost funny that that was exactly what she had been wary of at the onset of the war. ' _Oh gods, take me with you... Don't leave me all alone... again...'_ A hand settled on what was left of her right shoulder. She did not flinch or move away or even acknowledge it. Nerr felt it's weight, but other than that, there was no sensation. No pain or warmth- everything felt numb. Was there damage done to the nerves that remained, or was her mind so doused in static that she did not register what she was feeling?

 

“Do not take this to heart, Nerrida. The Nohrians... they need time to heal. You will see them again soon. They are your siblings after all.” No. Not anymore. Didn't he realize that? Didn't he realize that she had burned every last one of her bridges and now, she well and truly trapped? Nohrians did not forgive so easily, and they never forgot. The Hoshidans, however, acted as though the tension had been minimal. Hinoka's sigh sounded much lighter than it should have now that she knew that Leo would be the future ruler of the west. Leo, who bore grudges for years. Leo, who had stolen her cat, her first and only pet, to get back at her for something she had done when she was eight, something she'd done in retaliation for his actions... This war was not over. Nerr could feel it in the marrow of her bones, a seething hiss in her ears that warned of calamity.

 

“Too bad they're leaving so soon. They're going to miss the festival!” Death was coming, everything was red...

“...festival?” She asked blankly. How could... how could they have a festival? They were still rebuilding. They should still be in mourning. Hinoka frowned slightly, her voice a bit more subdued, as though she was talking about something shameful.

“Oh yeah... I forgot you've never seen a Hoshidan festival before.” Nerr had never seen any festival before. She had heard about them, the celebrations of holy days her family had been required to attend. The Hoshidan princess was still talking, growing more energetic the more she spoke. “It's like... the biggest party you can imagine. So turn that frown upside down and get ready to dance!” Sakura clapped her hands together in excitement, smiling though there were still traces of moisture on her cheeks.

 

“Oh, it's been s-so long since we've had a proper festival. D-do you think there will be dango? I miss dango...”

“Of course there'll be dango.” Takumi said dismissively. “What kind of festival doesn't have street food? Just... try not to embarrass yourselves this time you're members of the royal family.” Ryouma grinned.

“That's an odd thing coming from you, Takumi, considering last year you were the one who drank so much sake you climbed on the stage while the minstrels were playing...” The other Hoshidans laughed as the second prince covered his face in humiliation. Ryouma's mirth softened into a smile as he looked at Nerr, who was staring past them all. “I think some mindless enjoyment will do you well, sister.”

 

“Yeah!” Hinoka supplied. “We can help you with the games--”

“No.”

“You think you can do the ring toss left handed?” Scarlet grinned. “Well, look at you. I'm impressed.” The Nohrian girl shook her head, never letting her gaze shift from where it was fixated.

“No. I mean no, I will not be attending this festival. Parties and I do not mix. I've had all the crowds I can stomach for one lifetime. I'm going to sleep.” The Hoshidans stared at her, crying out in protest. Sakura rushed forward, her expression of breaking down.

“B-but nee-san, all you've done for weeks is sleep...! Come to the festival! Please, it's just one day!!” Nerr fixed her with a stare that bordered on hateful. Her chose her words very carefully.

 

“...I'm sorry. Does dying not earn me a bit of rest? Because need I remind you, I died. I lost parts of my body. I lost my family. I've been exiled from my home. ...I came to your coronation like I said I would. I'm done.” She began heading east. They were talking about her. How could they not be after she had spoken so harshly to sweet, innocent little Sakura who could never, ever, EVER replace Elise and how dare they even think she could!? Elise who would run after her, grab her hand and dig in her heels to try and stop her from leaving, _Big sis, no!_ Nerr shook off her hand violently. But there was nothing there. No Elise. No hand. She needed to sleep. There would be peace when she slept.

000

 

Nerr's feet carried her to a large lake in the middle of a clearing. There was a short wharf jutting out into the water. She had once seen a woman, a vision in blue and white and gold, glide over it, singing sweetly. No sweet music filled the air now, not even that of birds or insects. There was only a burst of harsh, staccato screaming that came so suddenly and loud that the princess stumbled, falling to her hand and knees on the sandy bank. Water lapped at her fingertips. The voices quieted a bit, an ever present buzz, but bearable. She stared at her hand, sinking into the wet sand. _Nerr... Yurari yurureri..._

 

“ _You are the ocean's gray waves..._ ” She blinked slowly. Her hand was still there.

 

 _“Desperate to seek life beyond the shore, just out of reach..._ ”

 

A loud voice echoed through the air, but it was almost... soothing. Something comforting in it's familiarity. Nerr looked up, blinking methodically to see if the figure would vanish like they sometimes did. It didn't. Awkwardly pushing herself to her feet, she walked into the lake, stumbling over slick pebbles but not stopping until she was in up to her knees. She stared out over it's surface. The sun painted the lapis water with golden streaks.

 

“So are you a hallucination, or a vengeful ghost?” Azura turned just enough to gave her a sidelong glance. Nerr felt that she could ever so slightly see through the songstress's form, but maybe that was just her eye playing tricks on her.

“Do I _look_ vengeful, Nerr?”

“That innocent facade can hide a lot of crazy. ...I have your pendant.” She held up her hand, the beaded chain still wrapped around her wrist. “Did you want it back?”

 

“I can't do anything with it. Throw it away.”

“That seems a waste. You don't want to give it to Sakura, or Hinoka?” After all, Azura seemed to have loved them both very must.

“Hmm...” She sounded thoughtful, but said nothing, to which Nerr responded with nothing. They seemed very similar. Two ghosts, one trapped amongst the the living, the other trapped away from them. Slowly, Azura lifted her arm, pointing out towards the middle of the lake. “Tell me Nerr. What do you see in the lake?”

“...water. Why; what am I supposed to see?”

 

“I think you might see something else. ….try not to think. Clear your mind and focus on my voice. Focus on the lake. Don't look away.” Nerr stared out over the crystal clear water, shining in the sunlight. Over the staccato hiss in her mind, she could hear Azura's voice, high and clear.

 

_“Sing with me a song of conquest and fate. The black pillar cracks beneath it's weight. Night breaks through the day, hard as a stone, Lost in Thoughts All Alone...”_

 

While the songstress sang, the static in her mind fell almost completely silent. The colors seemed to dull a bit. Even the lake seemed to grow darker, save for the middle, which shone like a window with a light on. Someone was standing there, right there in the middle of the lake. The moment she blinked, the human shape was gone.

 

“Azura?” She looked over to her side to find nothing there. The water remained still and calm. A cold feeling settled in her stomach. _Nerr_... It was coming from the water, just as it had come from the depths of the chasm. Maybe Azura knew what she had been seeking and was telling her what to do. The brush behind her rustled, a tall figure clad in white and red stepping into the clearing.

“Nerrida, what are you doing out here?” Ryouma sounded tried, as though he had no energy to be mad at her. “I thought you were going to sleep?”

“I am.”

“Then you need to go back to the castle.”

“I will.” The emperor made a noise that sounded like he was satisfied with her answers. When he spoke, however, his voice was uncertain.

 

“Were you... singing... a moment ago? I know I heard singing, and I thought... It sounded a lot like the song Azura used to sing...”

“I was lost in thoughts all alone.” Ryouma chuckled slightly. If Nerr bothered to turn around to face him, she was certain she would've seen him smiling wryly, his dark eyes cast with sadness.

“I suppose that's why you're standing in the water. Azura used to do that. Mother as well...” He sighed deeply. She could hear him turning to leave. “Just come back before it gets dark, Nerrida. Hinoka's going to have a fit if you run off again.” She said nothing, and it seemed that had been expected, because her blood brother did not press the matter, simply heading back the way he had come.

 

The voice calling to her grew more insistent. When she could no longer hear Ryouma's steps, she began walking as well, heading deeper into the lake with every step. The water was just barely tepid, but the sun was warm. By the time she had gone to waist high water, her feet could no longer touch the bottom. Inhaling, she ducked her head under, opening her eye while the empty socket filled up. Everything was clear and beautiful, bubbles floating like strings of pearls. The light shone even brighter, warm and comforting, almost as familiar as the voice that called out to her, louder and louder until she could feel it pressing against her lungs and heart and brain as she awkwardly tried to make her way towards the glowing beacon with only one arm. _Nerr... come home, Nerr... we miss you..._ Yes. She missed everybody as well. She would go home and amend her mistakes. And everything would be fine. The light grew brighter and brighter, blinding her completely as she drew closer, until it finally

000000000000

“ _For I know I cannot bear it all alone.”_

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A/N- w00t! Finito! This was WAY longer than I had originally planned for it to be, but I'm still pleased. There was no way in Hell I was gonna let Nerr off as easily here as I did in Rising Dark. Brain damage and PTSD and hallucinations are not enough. So yeah, she had an eye enucleation and a forequarter amputation (fancy talk for removing the eyeball and removing the entirety of the arm, including the scapula [shoulder blade]), on top of all the stuff that was wrong in TRD. Now, here's my quandary. I have started a version of this for Revelation, one that would tie in everything and go more into some Vallite lore (There's SOO much cool shit I could do with Valla and Anankos- the possibilities are endless!! I'm certain people would rather me move on to other stores about other things (other FE games, at least), but there's the rub; the other FE games don't actually inspire any thoughts in me. I consume them, and nod and say “Okay, that was a story. Guess it's done now. What's the next one?”. I think it's because the characters in those stories are very clearly their own characters. Whereas the avatars- Mark, Kris, Robin, and Corrin- are meant to be player characters. Now, if you don't want them to be self insert characters, you can keep their default name and play them like the canon character they are. But for me, as soon as I give a character a name, they become my character, who has their own mentality and morality. Nerr is not Corrin; if she were, she would be named “Corrin” and she would be a Nohr hating, Hoshido loving fool.

I love the narrative of Fire Emblem games; it's the characters that ruin that narrative for me, but I feel that if I were to apply this style of writing to other games that don't have player characters, it would ruin those games. If I made Marth as nihilistic and cold as Nerr, he wouldn't be Marth any more. However, if I made my Kris stand-in nihilistic and cold, Marth could play off that. My biggest point in these stories is that war changes people- it should. People should not be unaffected by the act of willfully murdering other people en masse regardless of their reasons and justification, but in Fire Emblem, more often than not, they are, and I wanted a story about a character that wasn't. Maybe when FE Switch comes out, it will be an interesting story that I'll feel could be better with some tweaking without having to just completely change all the main characters, but until then, I feel like I should stick with what I enjoy. Thank you so much for sticking through this to the end.


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